Chapter 36, Before Storm

Through dark forests, the elves rode towards the Rocky Valley. Along small paths, they galloped until finally the slope was too steep for the horses, and they had to be left behind.

As Legolas was striding the last steps of the journey upwards, glimpses of the all-too-familiar sight flashed between rocks and bushes - an army of elven soldiers down in the valley, waiting in straight lines to meet their King.

It had been sixty years since he had last been in front of these people, and everything was different. Almost everything - the only thing that was unwaveringly the same as before was the coat over his shoulders.

Everything inside and outside of the coat had reformed.

His world was turned upside down, and with every step he observed his surroundings closer. The soldiers down in the valley looked the same. Their weaponry, their clothing, their postures were the same as always, but the look in their eyes told him differently.

They were now people with a purpose.

The mountain slope might look the same - small junipers growing here and there, dotted with purple spots of heathers, delicate light green hay swaying in the wind, but each plant had a new meaning to him.

Each species brought vivid memories of a certain elf smelling them, listening to them, embracing them with all her heart.

His life had gone through an explosion, and its cause was strolling by his side. Inside her soul blew violent gales of uncertainty, yet her posture was calm.

It was not easy for her to ascend this slope today. Soon she would have to be standing on a cliff beside him, and all these elves would be watching her. No, not her, they would be watching them - Sulrochil and Legolas, and that image would not make it any easier for her.

With Sulrochil, the scene of the elven army brought a new meaning to Legolas. No longer were these soldiers expendable. They were their people, their family.

Never before had Legolas thought about it, but now it was apparent - he would not wish for their people to go to war, but into battle they were heading. Not because they had to, but because they wanted to. They were their people, their family. For your family, you will do anything.

To defend your home, you shall do everything.

"I have made a grave error!" Sulrochil suddenly burst out.

Slowly, Legolas emerged from his reverie and turned to look at her, "Of course you have."

"You have no idea what I am talking about." Sulrochil glared at him. "You are not even trying to understand."

"I understand you perfectly. You do not make slight slips. Moderate mistakes are not on your table. When you fail, it is "the blunder of the millennia". So, what is it this time?"

"I requested elves who have a great sense of hiding, but I should have asked for elves who feel things intensely. The meeting yesterday was so confusing I could not feel myself properly. Everything is still obscure, but after what Dathon told us, I understand that we have something wicked against us, and I would like to begin everything anew. Can I select new elves?"

"No need for that," Legolas assured. "Those six elves Hithfaeron and Noruinivel chose for you are indeed best at hiding, but they are also the elves of deep emotions. All thirty volunteers would have passed your hiding test, but they knew better what you must be after. They are not our best Captains for nothing."

Sulrochil did not answer, and Legolas continued, "I can tell you are astounded. But you surprised me today, as well. You must have given a lot of thought into how to be a leader."

"Given a lot of thought? Me?" she asked and knitted her brow. "Never. Did you really ask if I have thought about it? I have not considered it at all. I only do what feels right."

"You do it well, even though you have no training."

Sulrochil paused to weigh her feelings, "But there has been training. Of course, no formal training, but I have been in the army, and I have had leaders. I lead in a similar way to how I have been led. In my heart, I know what it is to be led well. You should be proud of Hithfaeron - he has planted this into my core."

"I never would have believed you could be patient."

"You said we lead by love."

"Love is not patience," he said, and let his hand brush the side of her fingers. "If anyone knows that, it would be me."

"Everyone is older than me, more experienced, more trained, more everything. I have got nothing to offer them but love."

"I understand you can do it for Hithfaeron or Noruinivel, and I appreciate it," he said. "But they do not oppose us. Dathon is wholly different."

"Dathon needs our love," she said. "Perhaps more than anyone else."

"I disagree," he said, "but this is not the right time to debate over this. We shall address these issues after the war. And then there is the mystery of you against Tauriel. You have made me hear all sorts of things about her - I was certain you would throw all of it at her face."

"She has done nothing wrong."

"No, she has not. Neither have I, but that never stopped you from throwing dirt at my face."

"You have not done anything exactly wrong," she said, "But not exactly right, either. Thus you deserve it."

"Always," he sighed, "I have not done anything wrong, yet I am the one who is forced to hear all of it."

"I very well cannot shout my blames at the people who have caused everything."

"Like Dathon?"

"He and the others."

"Alright, he has done something gravely wrong," he said. "Still, you can act patiently towards him. I do not recognise how."

"I could be him," Sulrochil said. "I am one of them, always have been. Dathon feels deeply, as I do. If I was in his position, I could have done the same. He made a mistake, but we can forgive him."

"He has done more than "a mistake"," he said. "And we let him off the hook too easily."

"Punishing him would not have produced anything of value," Sulrochil said and turned to look at Legolas. "You are wearing the coat you have worn for many centuries. When you pulled it over your shoulders, it brought back the old baggage of disdain. It is like the bitterness is woven into those seams. You have to emerge from the bog of hatred."

"The love in me is hammering it down," he said. "But it is not going to happen all at once."

"I know," she said. "But your life was locked inside a wooden box deep in a hole in the ground. Destruction triumphed, joy was diminished. You are still living the old life. It is hard for you to be anything else, and exchanging into this new world of ours will take time. You see, for me, this coat is love. When I put this on, I felt only love."

The path took them all the time closer to the King, who was standing on a cliff. The army standing down in the valley suddenly looked excessively undersized.

"Of course, you feel the love as well," Sulrochil continued. "But your burden has grown into you. It is impossible to delete it at once. There is so much old ache inside you. I would ask you to share it with me, but I cannot take it from you - no one can. However, could you allow your soul to lean toward me? I will be here, and I will not fall."

Once, there had been a time when King Thranduil's army was so large it was impossible to see the last elves in line. Now, they neatly fit in the small valley, but their hearts were more abundant than ever. Each and every one of them was full of love toward their Prince and his betrothed, who finally brought love and the sense of family to them again.

"It is not a weakness to forgive," she continued. "It requires strength - and that is something you do possess. We do not forgive because we let someone off the hook, but we need to set ourselves free. If we let the old suppressed grief define us, we are imprisoned. To break free, we need to forgive."

"This is not the right time," Legolas said, eyeing the darkness of the gathering clouds in the east. "It is war again, and I cannot let my heart soften to these matters."

"You have always been alone. All the time, you made decisions alone and took the consequences alone, and it is hard to change. Destruction pierced your heart at age six. That is when your soul is just beginning to bloom. At age six, you begin to see the world differently and begin to seize the incredibleness of the world. Yet, your soul was injured. Alongside the crippled Father, you took the first footsteps into life."

"Today, we are to kill again," he said. "And if you look closely at me, that is what I am - a tool of destruction. Useful for killing, very handy when someone needs to be eliminated, hardly valuable for much else. You deserve more, but forever your delicate soul is being crushed under my sins. Today, you are thrown right into the middle of misery again - just because of me."

"Today, we shall do what we must," Sulrochil said. "But it is love that sustains us. Can you let love flow through your veins so that everything you do today is made with love? When you draw your bow, it is because you love. When you slash with your knife, you do it so that someone else can live. Today, could you be a device of love?"

"I have been heartless. I have made cruel things," he said. "The entire land is gloomy and full of disrespect."

"Our people see the cause of it - the six-year-old boy, walking alone in the twilight."

"They pity me."

"No one pities you!" Sulrochil exclaimed. "Look at what you have become!"

"You pity me, as well."

"No!"

"Tell me the truth," he insisted. "What did you think of me before you knew me?"

"Nothing," she said. "It was not my place to think anything of you."

"I see," he said. "You are afraid to admit the truth."

"You were my Prince - I would have given my life for you."

"Very much appreciated, thank you," he stated. "All I have managed to achieve is a miserable pathway paved with dead elves."

"I still would give my life for you, but now I know I do not need to."

"No," Legolas said.

"What I need to do is love you. To love you means to let you be the one to give your life for me - if it ever comes to that."

"It shall not, because I shall thrash whoever endangers you."

"I know," Sulrochil said. "But that means only visible foes. There are far greater threats to us - inside our minds. Do know this: when your soul falters, I shall be there to keep you in the land of the living."

"It shall not waver."

"I did not say 'if', I said 'when'," she stated. "To be a rock is impossible. To never stumble is for gods."

"Stop right there!"

"No, because you need to hear this now," she pressed on. "We are elves. We feel - we feel more profoundly than anyone. You are one of the mightiest elves to ever have lived on earth, and it means your inner world is far greater than everything you see around you. Whether you like it or not, the fall will happen."

"Exactly what I needed to hear on the verge of war."

"True," she stated.

"Well, thank you for the kind words," he said. "And all the encouragement."

"You do not need encouragement," she said. "You will lead our people to victory today - where the orcs are concerned. They shall prove to be as dumb as before, if not dumber. You shall beat them with blindfolded eyes, using only your left hand."

"What I heard was 'you will fail'."

"There is pain inside you, and that must be suppressed for one day," she said. "So if I managed to pester you enough, and you shall have it within your power to shove all your agony into the abysses of your soul for today - then I did the right thing."

The first rays of sun came through the cloudy sky when the elves reached the cliff.

Everyone else stepped aside, letting the Prince and his betrothed stand beside their King. Sulrochil lifted her jaw, put her hand on her quiver's strap, and drew strength from Legolas. The King looked at her, and with tiny eye movements, he made her discern that he was pleased to see her - and her new coat. Even quicker was his glance at Legolas' hair, but the brief spark of amusement in the King's eyes did not go unnoticed by Sulrochil. She could not be sure what the others had seen, but it warmed her heart to find out Thranduil wanted to make her feel welcome.

Sulrochil studied the army down in the valley only to find out every single one of them was gazing at her with curiosity.

"This is the day of the war," the King said to the army standing in the valley in front of them. "Yet another in a long row of days full of blood and tears. But I give you this: this is the last day of fighting for our people."

All of nature was silenced when the elves bowed for their King.

"Today, you are not alone," King Thranduil continued. "It is finally occurring again - you do not have to meet the battles merely with your own strength. Once again, there is love shielding our people, and therefore we will gain victory today. With love, we can do this.

"We all have anticipated this day for a long time. An elven army without love is brutal, demolishing everything in its way, leaving only bloodshed behind. Today there is love - we all have overheard the whisper in the wind revealing to us what has taken place over the past few days.

"Legolas is here with us again," the King said, and paused for a moment to let the people bow to their Prince. "And he is not alone. This is Sulrochil." He turned to look at her and extended his arm towards her to show her to everyone.

The entire army of elves gave her a bow with their hand over their heart. Sulrochil watched their movements as they all straightened themselves again, and grabbed the straps of their quivers to stand at attention.

Not an eye blinked when the valley full of elves saluted her in straight lines. Sulrochil glanced at the King, and his eyes showed that he wanted her to know that this army was hers.

She glanced at Hithfaeron, who stood at attention as well. Not even a hint of disregard for her will, even though he had been her leader for many centuries. During those years, the sight of Hithfaeron's slight hand movement for 'stand easy' had been drilled into her heart.

Legolas and Thranduil used a different gesture - only a slight eye movement - but deep in her heart, she knew she had to mimic her former Captain's hand gesture to convince everyone that the army might be hers, but she was theirs as well.

Sulrochil's fingers swept the air, all elves released the grip on their quiver straps. All eyes bore into her, and even though it was invisible, she felt in her heart the warmth of hundreds of smiles around her.

"Our souls yearn for rest," the King continued. "Our souls crave peace, and today we shall deliver it. Our mission is simple: to overcome the last outpost of darkness in Middle-earth, so the men can live in peace when there is no evil in this world anymore. That is the wish of Legolas and Sulrochil.

"That is the gift we are going to present to them today.

"Their love is our home, and today we shall defend our home. Our real homes are far from Shadowland, but the sentiment is the same - protect everything good and pure. And it is not only love that will aid us today. We gained an immense advantage yesterday. In Shadowland, the opposing groups of enemies are slaughtering themselves. Since yesterday, we have had reports of full-scale massacre between the disparate groups. They kill each other, thus making it easy for us to push into their area.

"This did not come by luck. This was brought to us by Sulrochil. What we are about to do today would not be possible without her.

Only small rustles were heard when every single elf around them bowed to Sulrochil. She stood in awe and could not imagine what she should say and when she turned her eyes expectantly to the King to ask him to continue, she also saw the King lift his hand to his heart and bow to her. She could only hope her turbulence would not show to anyone, and when the King again stood straight, resuming his indifference, he nodded to Legolas.

With a reassuring smile, he stepped one step backwards so he could also bow to Sulrochil. "I have not been here in the last sixty years," Legolas began. "Today, I have returned, and I am not alone. This is Sulrochil, and I admire her courage. What she did yesterday in Shadowland was incomparably invaluable to us.

"You all know what she and her group will be doing today - I will not repeat it because the rocks might have ears - but without her, we could not eradicate all evil today. So, there you see, she is everything our kingdom needs right now - myself above all others."

Sulrochil turned to look at Legolas, shocked. Did I hear what you just said correctly? You cannot say that to them!

I just did. Legolas turned to stare at Sulrochil. Did you know you are beautiful?

In silence, Sulrochil glared at him. Keep your eyes in check!

I watch whatever I wish. Legolas smiled back at her, his eyes full of love.

I can tell! You are irritating me on purpose!

You irritated me earlier. Now it is my turn. The collar of your coat is charming. There is one problem, though - it is way too tight.

Stop this! There is an army full of people waiting for us to say something wise and encouraging. Do they expect me to say something? There is nothing, absolutely nothing, I can say after this.

They do not expect you to say anything, especially anything wise. They just want to observe our love. We cannot kiss, nor can we touch in any way in front of them. The only thing I can do is annoy you, so you frown at me for a few seconds before your eyes melt and overflow with love. I already see the breeze of love in your eyes, and it is beautiful. You are glorious. You are-

And you are irredeemable.

The delightful smile on both lips made them slowly begin to drift towards each other. Neither knew what might have resulted if they had not been interrupted by a loud announcement by one of the guards, "The Chief Archery Master Nardhon."

Sulrochil saw an elf approach carrying a bunch of arrows. The arrows seemed both familiar and strange at the same time until it hit her - these were Legolas' arrows. Of course she had seen them in his quiver during the past few centuries when he had carried those.

"My Lord Legolas," Nardhon said, and bowed. "Here are your arrows."

A surge of disappointment went through Sulrochil when she realised Nardhon gave all the arrows to Legolas, who took all of his former arrows out of his quiver. He gave them to Nardhon and put all the new ones in the quiver. She had assumed she would be receiving a portion of them, and she berated herself for being so self-centred - they are only arrows, and she could shoot any kind. She would not need these - but still, it hurt. She was so profoundly in her reverie, it took a while for her to realise Legolas tried to pull her back from distant skies to stand on the cliff with him. Sultithen, look at me. Slowly, Sulrochil directed her eyes to Legolas, and when their eyes met, she felt his plea for forgiveness. I am sorry I did not explain this to you, but you made me forget everything.

"Sulrochil," Legolas said when he saw she was admittedly listening, "you are carrying old arrows. Arrows that belong to your past. Please, pass them to Nardhon." Legolas paused and waited as Sulrochil hesitantly emptied her quiver and handed them to the Chief Archery Master, who bowed after he had received them.

"What is mine is yours," Legolas continued. "My arrows are your arrows." He took half of his arrows and showed them to Sulrochil. "These are our arrows now."

Sulrochil tried to reach the arrows, but Legolas did not release his grip. "May these arrows give us victory today against our adversary." With a warm smile, he tucked the arrows into her quiver.

Do I need to say something? she thought, trying not to fall off her feet. Why did you not tell me about this and what is expected of me?

"May our arrows lead us today to a triumph," Legolas said and assured Sulrochil that she could say something if she preferred to, but that no one expected anything from her.

"May our arrows lead us today to victory," Sulrochil thought, intensely watching into Legolas' eyes, "but let us not forget that these are not arrows of hatred, but of love. We are not here today because we are cruel and want to hurt our enemy. We are here because we love."

"Today, we will fight for freedom," Legolas said, and his smile told Sulrochil that she indeed had given everyone what they wished to see - unspoken messages of love in their eyes. "Freedom to love, freedom to live. For too long has evil rampaged in Middle-earth, and today we shall put an end to it."

"Trust that I will be there for you always," Sulrochil thought. "Our beings are being reshaped. Now, we are creatures of love, and we need that love to define us. We must let go of old selves, old beliefs - let go of everything we know and let love go straight through us. Our people need our love."

The King stepped forward, nodded to Legolas and Sulrochil and addressed his words to all the warriors. "A full quiver is unimportant if your heart is empty. Today our hearts are not void but overflowing with love. Only with love can we win today.

"Look thoroughly at Sulrochil and Legolas," the King said. "For them, we shall fight today."

Not a sound was heard from the valley when the hundreds of elves bowed to their King - and their Prince and his betrothed.

The forest around them was glimmering brightly as all the trees graciously hummed their approval to the crowds of elves surrounding them.

The woods pleaded, the trees wailed. The forest had a message, and it should be delivered to the King. The message had been there from the beginning, but the trees' shouts had always fallen on deaf ears. Their desperation grew as, year after year, their voice was disregarded.

Noruinivel knew no one would take the advice to the King if not her. Uncomplainingly, she stood still under a friendly birch, waiting for Sulrochil and her group to begin their journey. With a quick eye movement, she invited Dathon with her to request an audience with the King.

"My Lord," she said when they finally had the King listening. "You are in danger."

"That is hardly news," he responded. "It is the King they always fancy."

"It is different this time. I am afraid-"

"It is Uilosson," Dathon cut in.

"Uilosson?" the King said, disguising his surprise. "He is long dead."

"He was in the forest a few days ago, my Lord," Dathon said. "His spirit was lingering above the lilies-of-the-valley that so unexpectedly had sprouted. And, my Lord, do not assume for one moment that he was the foundation of the forest's recovery. He was behind the wickedness that had ruined it originally."

"Highly improbable," the King said. "An elf cannot damage a forest."

"No," Noruinivel said. "An elf cannot, but he is not alone. Uilosson was tempted by evil. The forest told us-"

"Sauron has been defeated - it shall be easy to demolish any remnants of his followers today."

"It is not Sauron," Noruinivel insisted. "But another sort of evil."

"Go on."

"Always, I have felt silent spots here and there in the forest. Empty. Dark. It is profoundly troubling for the trees. Since yesterday, these spots occur more often and are more distinct. I wish to evade them, but I cannot. They come closer, go further again, and I am certain there is someone in those black points between two nothings. Between two moments of nought, she goes."

"She?"

"The forest is frightened, my Lord. In the middle of two voids, she walks and tempts vulnerable people right there in decent, companionable woods! I cannot see her, but I know she is there. Were she not, I would feel the whole forest, the whole sky. The world would be whole without her - these empty, lucid blacknesses tell me there is someone."

"How do you know to call her 'she'?"

"The forest has disclosed this piece of information to me."

"There is no proof that she is there, except your feelings."

"Not only my feelings, my Lord," Noruinivel said and bowed. "The forest's message is clear. It has always been willing to aid you, even though you have aspired not to seek its guidance."

"But the time is different now."

"It is," Noruinivel said. "I feel it, my Lord. You are walking along treacherous paths."

"No matter the outcome," Thranduil said. "I will be fine."

"Sulrochil feels it as well."

"That young lady should be renamed the Fair Maiden of Disorientation. She feels all sorts of things. If I were to change something due to her whims, I would be but a weathervane."

"Would you accept Lady Galadriel's prediction? Tauriel brought her intelligence from Lothlorien. 'Bellow out, she is to come, To win your love, To send you a dove, And fly you above all the splendours of the world-'"

"That," the King interrupted her, "is a piece of an old poem. It hardly signifies anything today."

"We do not know it, my Lord," Noruinivel said. "Please, forgive my directness, but I must speak now. You must have considered whether Uilosson was behind the death of your wife. Is he after revenge for not ascending the throne?"

"He is an elf. He does not desire retribution over this sort of matter."

"The Sorceress desires-"

"Now, let us assume for a brief moment that there exists this Sorceress. And let us assume, as well, that she is behind all this - and, do know this, I firmly gainsay these presumptions. Because if they were the truth, she would have had almost three thousand years to reach me. Why would she have waited this long to strike again?"

"Something has changed this time, my Lord," Noruinivel said.

"Old wives' tales, Noruinivel. Nothing more than that, and I would never have believed you falling for them."

"The timing is suspicious," Dathon said. "Whoever is behind this has had three millennia to attack anew, but why now? Are they after Legolas? Or Sulrochil?"

"It is only in both of your imaginations that this could be the same creature who killed the Queen in the past. Shadowland popped out of nowhere a short time ago - most likely they are only residues of Sauron's-"

"No," Noruinivel interrupted. "Shadowland did not appear out of nowhere. Evil never rises without a cause! This is ancient. The fo-"

"They are after what all evil creatures are - annihilating as many good people as they can before being killed. Plundering as much as-"

"My Lord," Noruinivel snapped. "You are the target!"

"If I am the objective of this ancient creature," the King said, and let his eyes sweep over both Captains in front of him, "why wait this long to attempt to kill me?"

"Their inclination is not to kill you-"

"But to use you," Dathon finished Noruinivel's sentence "If they, Uilosson and the Sorceress, were behind the death of your wife, my Lord, their intention was to wound you."

"Their only reason was to make you suffer," Noruinivel began but stopped and closed her eyes. "They have waited this long because-"

"It takes a long time to break an elf's soul," Dathon said. "They have a vile plan to intrude in our Kingdom by crushing your soul, my Lord."

"If that is their purpose," the King said, "it is not going to succeed."

"Only an elf would know what needs to be done to shatter an elf's-," Noruinivel whispered but could not finish her sentence. In a blink of an eye, she composed herself and addressed her words to the King, "My Lord, one more question. Would you accept additional shielding around you?"

"I do not matter anymore," the King said. "My time is over. It is the same whether I live or die."

"You matter to them, my Lord," Noruinivel said. "Legolas and Sulrochil need you here now - more than ever. You do not wish for them to use their betrothal year learning to lead a kingdom, especially when said kingdom would be bereaved by its King's drastic loss. Everyone wishes to let them use their year roaming freely in the woods, staring into each other's eyes in the silly way of only newly-found love, so that when they finally marry, they are ready. They need time to love, not to grieve, my Lord."

"It is not like you to oppose me."

"And it is not like you to let anyone get off this easily, my Lord," Noruinivel said and bowed. I will do today everything to shield my kingdom and the people in it, my Lord, including you. Especially you, my Lord. I will tail you to the end of this.

"You intend to follow me today," the King said, boring his eyes into the Captain.

"This is a new era."

"I am from the old regime," the King said. "Do not track me."

"No, my Lord." This is about you, my King. It has always been.

"Good," the King replied. Noruinivel had, of course, lied, and she had no intention of obeying the King. But he also knew in his heart the genuine reason for it - and therefore let it go. If his children wished for him to be safeguarded by Noruinivel, who was he to discredit it?

"Regard the forest, my Lord," Noruinivel said. "It has a message for you."

"A word of dire urgency, I presume," Thranduil said. "What have the trees sung for you this time?"

"The trees are not to reveal it to anyone but you, my Lord."

"Well, then their secrets shall remain disclosed."

"I cannot make them unveil their confidential advice. That shall be exposed only for you, my Lord, but I can remind you of their appeal that they have been shouting out for as long as you have been our King."

"Enlighten me."

"Become our true King, my Lord," Noruinivel whispered. "It is the will of the forest and the longing of our people. We chose you to be our King. You were to lead us with all the wisdom the forest can give, but the joy was stolen from you. You were intended to seek the wisdom of the woods with your… I am afraid your path has not been the one we would have preferred for you, but please, hear the forest now. Let the wisdom of the forest unlock your heart, not for the sake of our people, but for the sake of your children.

"If our suspicions prove to be accurate, you are in peril. We are not concerned about your death. It is not the killing of your body that we fear, but the mangling of your soul. If these assumptions are the truth, you shall be faced with the one you have wished to meet for so long - the one who took your wife away from you. You shall be filled with vengeance, and that, my Lord, is what we fear - the forest and I.

"Become our true King, my Lord, the one that our people for so long has waited, wished, and prayed for. The one that we elected you to be, the one whose heart is filled with the congeniality of the forest, the one who is the true King of the Forest. Embrace the wisdom of the trees. Let their amiability fill your soul. Let the spirit of the forest fill your heart so that there is no room for any desire for revenge."

The forest vibrated in the way that happens only on the eve of war - it sang of the beauty of nature and the horridness of battles.

"Heed the advice of the trees, my Lord. Welcome her."

The King let Noruinivel speak. He did not wish to interrupt her, but neither did he want to solicit her advice. Slowly, he scrutinised the small birches arising here and there. Their slender stems swaying in the wind, the tiny leaves trying to catch the first daylight. Could they have a message for him?

A faint hope flickered in the heart of the forest, but it was smashed to pieces with one single word.

"No."