The Envelope 37
Author's Note: In this chapter we have a flashback and a ghost-talk piece that are in italics. Please review and let me know what you think of the story.
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Don Ressler rose from his seat having listened to the mayor, the head of the organization that saw the project through, and a famous author from DC and walked to the podium and microphone. He had learned to speak to crowds better in his years as AD, but this was a personal speech.
"Thank you everyone who joined us here today," Don said to the group of people sitting in chairs in front of him. "I want to take a moment to thank the District Library system, the architects who created this beautiful structure, the workers who put their blood and sweat into making it so child-friendly, and the mayor of Washington DC for his continued support of this endeavor."
He looked down at his two children sitting in the audience.
"My children may not have their mother with them any longer, but what they do have, thanks to Raymond Reddington is a memorial to her that will help countless children explore learning, play, and adventure. They will have a beautiful space, created in their mother's honor to come and sit with friends, read a book, explore art, or just remember their mom. They will see children learning and exploring in this library that was created because Raymond Reddington loved their mother like a daughter. A beloved daughter."
Don felt his voice getting hoarse and cleared his throat.
"Liz grew up in Michigan with her adoptive father and aspired to one day be a psychologist and FBI agent. Well, she accomplished that, in spades. She helped solve countless cases and bring in some of the most dangerous criminals around the world, and all with a…smile on her face."
The audience chuckled at his comment.
"She loved adventure, and bad jokes, and ridiculous socks, and greasy food, and her friends. She was the bravest woman I have ever met, and the fiercest advocate for the wronged and the neglected in our world. She made everyone around her accountable. She made everyone she encountered a better person. And she made me a better man."
Don looked out at the crowd.
"I miss her everyday," Don said as he willed his eyes to stop watering. "But now, I can visit this beautiful, beautiful, library with our children and feel like she's still with us. In the laugher of children, the looks of awe as they walk into the space, and the giggles as they play. And Liz would have loved everything about that. Raymond Reddington knew that, so he gave that to us, all of the citizens of Washington DC to enjoy. So, please join me as I officially open the Elizabeth Keen Children's Library."
The applause erupted and Don smiled at the crowd through glazed eyes and then walked back to his seat with his friends and his children.
"Good job," Valentino said as she wiped at her nose and teary eyes and handed him Kit.
Don gave her a tight smile and quickly wiped at his eyes.
"Ladies and gentleman, please enjoy the library," a woman from the podium said and people started to rise to walk inside.
"I didn't know where else to go," Liz said as she stood at his door, her marriage having just fallen apart.
Don let her inside and took her coat, hanging it on his coat rack before he invited her to sit.
"What happened?" He asked as he sat in a chair opposite her.
"Everything," Liz said as the tears started to fall. She told him about Tom, the fight, how everything was a lie…
He got up and sat next to her, wrapping an arm around her and letting her cry against him, railing against the injustice of the world and the life she thought she had. And she fell asleep, snotty and wrung out against him. He sat there for a half hour after he knew she was asleep wondering if he should just lean back and try to catch some shut eye, or wake her, or try and extricate himself from her so she could sleep on his couch.
He finally decided on extraction and started to pull away, but she fell against him more and he was trapped with her nuzzled against him. He didn't want her to wake up like this and think he'd taken advantage of the situation, but the more he tried to maneuver away, the more she seemed to pin him against the sofa. Finally, he resolved to pick her up, he slipped his one free arm under her knees and, despite his own knees screaming as he stood with her against him, managed to stand and carry her to his room where he laid her, fully clothed in his bed and covered her with the duvet.
Don returned to his sofa and crammed his too-long body onto the too-small frame and pulled a too-light blanket over his body to try and fall asleep.
He woke to a sight that he didn't think he'd ever see, Liz Keen standing in his t-shirt and shorts cooking something in his kitchen.
"Liz?" Don asked as he unfolded himself from the sofa and massaged his throbbing neck.
"Thank you for taking me in last night," Liz said as she moved a spatula around in the pan. "And for listening to me cry and pour my heart out."
"No problem," Don said as she stood and cracked his back, he was going to be paying for sleeping on that sofa for days.
He walked stiffly toward the kitchen and looked at her.
"I woke up in the middle of the night and grabbed these out of a drawer, I hope that's…"
"It's fine," Don said dismissively. "You look like they are about 3 sizes too big but…"
Liz lifted the t-shirt briefly and showed him her waist. "Draw string."
He chuckled.
She placed the eggs on two plates with the toast that was already there.
"I mean it, thank you," Liz said as she offered him the plate and then she looked at him funny.
"What?" He asked.
"I think you should change after we're done," she said with a cringe. "I think that's my snot all over your shirt."
Don looked down at the white streaks on his shirt and chuckled. "Yeah, probably."
"Sorry about that," Liz smiled at him.
"It's fine," Don said as he took a seat on a stool. "What's a little snot and tears between friends?"
Liz laughed at his joke and he was happy to see a smile on her face again after everything she'd been through.
Two hours later, his friends were relaxing in his yard, drinking, and eating kebobs.
"How are you doing Dembe?" Don asked him as they stood in his kitchen alone. After the memorial dinner Dembe had disappeared for a few months, reappeared for a little while, then had disappeared again.
"I am working on a project to help farmers finance small scale farming in sub Saharan Africa," Dembe said with a smile.
"Wow, that's amazing," Don said as he leaned against his counter. "How did you come up with it?"
"Many farmers just need upstart money to get the seeds and equipment, then, once they have that, they are successful farmers," Dembe said. "I provide the small business loans for the start up and they pay me back, zero interest."
"Zero?" Don inquired.
"I don't need the money," Dembe said. "I just want to help people."
Don nodded, "so, is that where you have been disappearing to?"
"Sometimes," Dembe said.
"And other times?" Don asked.
"I spend time with family, or alone," Dembe said. "I am finding it challenging to be alone again after so many years with Raymond."
"I get that," Don said with a nod. "You know you are always welcome here."
"I know," Dembe said.
"The kids love you," Don said. "And I miss you."
Dembe pulled his friend into a hug and walked from the kitchen to join the others in the yard.
Don stuck a straw into a juice box for Kit and was about toe re-join everyone when he heard her.
"How are you doing?" Liz asked from behind him.
Don turned on his heel and saw her leaning against the door frame to the living room.
"Liz," Don said as he walked toward her. He hadn't seen her in almost a year.
"Hey stranger," she said with a smile as she took his hands in hers and pulled him into the living room to hug him.
"How are you?" She asked as she gripped him against her.
"I miss you and I miss him…" Don said. "But the library, your library, is beautiful."
She chuckled. "Leave it to him to make it a circus theme."
Don looked at her and snickered. "He made our lives a circus from the moment he walked into them."
"Exactly," Liz smiled.
"How is he?" Don asked.
"Good," Liz said. "We've talked a lot. I didn't want him to die, but it was nice to have him again. Does that sound weird?"
"Sort of," Don said, he stepped back and kept his hands on her hips.
"The kids are…amazing," Liz said in awe. "Kit is growing so big."
"He is," Don smiled. "He loves school, going into SK…and Agnes…"
"How is our daughter ten?" Liz asked, her eyes wide.
"I know, right?" Don chuckled. "She's so funny and such a great athlete."
"After you," Liz chuckled. "Not me, I have no team sport skills and I can barely swim."
Don leaned in and kissed her gently on the lips. "How are you?"
Her eyes got watery, and she looked down at the ground between them. "I think I need to stop this."
"Stop what?!" Don asked, alarmed.
"Visiting," Liz explained. "At first it made me so happy to connect with you. But now…"
"Now?" Don asked, his brow furrowing.
"Now, it makes me sad," Liz explained.
"Sad, why? What can I do?" Don asked, anxiously.
"Nothing," Liz smiled at him. "You are doing all the right things. You are a fantastic dad, a great AD, a wonderful friend…I'm just jealous I'm missing it. I'm missing you."
"Liz, you have me," Don said softly.
"I know I do," Liz said. "But I shouldn't, not anymore. I'm just being selfish at this point."
He looked at her confused. "Don't leave me, not again. Please Liz."
"Ressler…"
"I'll do anything," he said, anxiety and panic caking his voice. "Honestly, anything. Keep coming back to me. Please Liz. I need you."
She leaned in and kissed him soundly on the lips. When she pulled back, he was smiling, convinced he had implored her to stay, Don let out the breath he had been holding.
"I love you," Liz said softly.
"I love you too," Don said with a small smile.
"Goodbye," Liz said before she disappeared in front of his eyes.
"No, no, no, Liz!" He called to her. "Liz, come back to me, please…come back."
He looked at the ceiling and his hands what had just rested on her hips. He could still feel her lips on his. Don closed his eyes and breathed in the scent of her, she was still with him, if he just stood there smelling her, and feeling her, and hearing her voice, she wouldn't leave him. She would always be there, with him. He needed that more than anything in that moment, for Liz to never leave him again.
A child's curdled pained scream came from his yard and in a moment, Don bolted through his kitchen, out his back door and toward his child. He ran past everyone to protect the child that needed him and was screaming in pain. Kit was crying and screaming and inconsolable.
Don's heart was racing as he picked up his child and Christopher clung to him with tears pouring out of his eyes.
"What happened?" Don asked frantic.
"Bumble bee," Kit wailed even harder.
"Where?" Don asked him.
Kit opened the palm of his hand and Don saw the swollen red mark and the stinger sticking out of his palm. It was the first time Kit had ever been stung, and he had probably grabbed the bee thinking they could play, and the bee had other plans.
"Oh babe, it's okay, I'll fix it," Don said as he carried his son inside followed by Ozturk and Aram.
A freezie was immediately given to Kit to stop the screaming and the boy fell into a state of whimpering and sucking on the cold sugary treat while his father pulled the stinger, cleaned it, put cream on the sting, and a band aid that Don was sure would fall off within 5 minutes of application.
"Better?" Don asked him as he leaned down to look in his son's eyes as he sat on the kitchen counter.
Kit nodded and wiped at his face.
"Ready to go outside and play again?" Don asked.
Kit nodded and Don pulled him down off the counter.
"No more touching bees, okay little man?" Don asked him.
Kit nodded.
"Can you two take him outside and I'll clean this up?" Don asked.
Aram and Ozturk walked Kit outside and Don leaned his head against the upper cupboards and took three deep breaths. His heart was still hammering in his chest at the thought of his child hurt and the fact that minutes had passed had not calmed him down.
He cleaned up the swabs and band aid papers and threw them in the garbage and looked over at the door frame where Liz last greeted him. He couldn't smell her anymore, and the feeling of her hips was a memory on his hands not a reality. She was gone.
He knew, in that moment, that she wasn't coming back to him anymore. She was truly gone. Don leaned his head against the cabinet and closed his eyes. He needed a moment to feel the loss once again.
To be continued…
