Chapter 3 ~ Sweet Like Vanilla & Honey

When Sam steps out from the bathroom, Dean's sitting at the bed, facing him.

He looks kind of miserable, Sam realizes, but he gulps down his concern, though his eyes soften, and his posture loosens up a notch.

"So …", Sam says and pats over to his duffel. "What is it that you wanna talk about so badly?" He rummages through his duffel.

"Why don't you sit down for this?" Dean's voice is hoarse and wrecked all of a sudden.

Sam perks up and looks at his partner's back – a bit surprised. Then again, he may doesn't have to be surprised at all.

"So – you're gonna break up now? Is that it?", Sam tries to keep his voice steady and he succeeds.

Sam keeps his eyes on Dean, making sure he's not going to face him while he drops the towel, slips hastily in his boxers and jeans.

"What? – No. – I'm not … I mean …", Dean trails off and huffs out a breath.

"Look. – If you think you are responsible for me – or – I don't know – something like that. You aren't, okay?" Sam pulls a shirt from the duffel and pulls it over his head. "You don't need to feel like you have to watch out for me."

"Stop. – Sam. Wait.", Dean lifts his hand to stop him and looks back over his shoulder." Pump the breaks. – would you just … sit down? Please?"

Dean waits until Sam sits down on the chair by the table. His gaze catches on the gash on Sam's cheek, assess it. He wants to ask if he can have a look at it. Stand up and walk over to the man he loves and take care of the wound. Even check him over for other injuries, like they usually do after a hunt.

But he tells himself he can do that later. Because if he doesn't tell Sam now, he may wouldn't fill him in at all.

Sam stares at him. Half hurt, half mad.

Dean can tell, Sam's having a hard time keeping it together.

"I'm sorry, Sammy.", Dean eventually says and sighs. Then he stands up and joins Sam at the table. "I didn't mean to be an asshole, okay?"

Sam chuckles – it sounds hurt. "Oh really?"

"Yeah." Dean frowns at him. He wants to reach out to Sam, touch him, but he's too far away to reach him from where he sits across the table, and that's maybe a good thing. "I've had a hard time, you know? Figuring things out …"

Sam leans back in the plastic-chair and crosses his arms in front of his chest. He's not looking at Dean. He keeps staring at the ugly puke-green carpet at his feet.

"… thing is … after we got you back. – Bobby told me something about you."

"Wow. – Nice. Bobby told you something about me. – So … it's such a bad thing, that you don't want me near you anymore? That it?" Sam shrugs and stands up, walking towards the bathroom-door, then turns on his heels and pins Dean down with his look. "I've been a whore, Dean. – What could possibly be worse than that? Huh?"

Dean swallows. Hard. Keeping his eyes trained at Sam. He wants to tell him that it doesn't matter what he's been before, and that he's not supposed to talk about himself like that, but he gulps it down with all the guilt he carries deep down in his guts.

"You're my little brother, Sammy.", Dean's voice breaks. "You're my brother. – That's what."

Sam freezes. His eyes go wide. "What?", he stutters.

There's absolute silence for a couple of minutes.

Sam shifts from one foot to another, seeming to weighing his options as he snatches a glance at the door, and looks back at Dean then.

"We're siblings. – My mom gave you to Jody. She thought you wouldn't be safe if anyone knew you'd be alive …at least that's what I think.", Dean tells him, but he's not quite sure Sam's even hearing him right now.

"You sure?", Sam asks in disbelieve. He sounds as if Dean's been telling him obvious fake-news.

Dean nods at him. Still watching. Still observing. "Yeah. I am."

"So?", Sam asks and huffs out a breath, then shakes his head as if it doesn't concern him at all.

"What?", Dean asks back, because he can't understand why this doesn't seem to shake Sam up at all.

"Wow …" Sam finally moves. He sways slightly, but makes it over towards the bed and slumps down on it. "What else am I supposed to say?", he asks Dean. "It's kinda fucked up though …"

"Dude. – It's six-ways-from-Sunday-fucked-up.", Dean chuckles nervously.

"Think we can be glad I ain't a girl. – That'd be much worse I guess." Then Sam hums, observing Dean cautiously, trying to figure out where Dean stands with his opinion.

Dean gives him a weird look, telling him it's not funny. – Not at all.

"Look. – Okay. We're brothers …" Yeah, even to Sam it feels weird saying that, and he feels like it should bother him, but it actually doesn't. "… but it doesn't change a thing – does it?"

Not a little bit.

It's just another shit-thing to happen in his live aside from everything else. So far, the one good thing he's had – besides Jody Mills being his mom – is Dean. And he sure as hell won't give that up, because some shitty fate-dude decided to mess around with them.

Dean looks at him in disbelieve. "So … it's that easy for you?" … he had figured Sam'd freak out.

Sam shrugs. "Yep."

"How?", Dean asks, his face scrunched up in confusion. Because he doesn't get, that Sam can be so cool about it.

"Because – it doesn't actually change anything between the both of us. – Not for me anyway. – So, that's the reason why you've been acting like a fucking dick?"

Dean shrugs. "Yep."

Sam huffs out a breath and shakes his head. "Why wouldn't you tell me earlier?"

Dean explains to him why he's been holding back and what it felt like for him – and long story short: It soon turns into a major-chick-flick-moment deluxe.

They talk, and the more they talk about them being brothers, the more Dean loosens up and seems to be at ease with himself. A weight seems to fall from his shoulders the more they chat.

The fact that Sam doesn't seem to mind at all, and that he thinks that it's funny that they're brothers, lightens Dean's mood even more.

SPN

They end up sitting on the bed, some sappy soap-opera playing on TV, volume turned down, as they talk.

They are taking turns in drinking from the bottle of whiskey.

Sam laughs out loud, when he's joking about how he's going to call Dean his big brother, when they're going to have sex.

Dean gives him a weird look, because he doesn't think it's funny – not at all. It's even freaking him out – massively.

So, he tells Sam to shut up, because if he's going to call him that, there won't be any sex at all for days – or even weeks – if not months.

Before they fall asleep, they share a tender kiss and Sam wraps himself around Dean, head nestled into his big brother's chest, while he strokes his back.

"I love you.", Sam whispers into Dean's shirt.

"Love you too, baby boy.", Dean whispers back and tugs Sam impossibly closer.

SPN

A/N:

THE END of Part 4 ~ Brothers ?

I hope you enjoyed it? Let me know what you guys think ?