Disclaimer: Everyone dies. The end. I do not own Alex Rider.

Chapter 39: Answers

Something was off with Alex.

The last few days hadn't been quite as smooth as they should have been and everyone was on edge. There were no signs that kidnappers were going to jump out of the woodwork, but being in another country, completely marooned from all hope of support was a little more unnerving than the unit was used to. Everyone had their own way of coping; some were just more annoying than others.

Alex though, was the worst. More than once, he had restlessly paced the house until someone – usually Cameron – got fed up with him and either gave him something to do or took him out. The outings seemed to help, which was nearly the opposite to what Nico had observed before. Before everything had gotten massively complicated.

There was, of course, always the fear that Alex was just going to get up and leave one day. After everything they had sacrificed… well, Nico just hoped that Alex realized just how much they had given up. Their lives, and any hope of a normal life, was gone just by taking off around the globe with him. Mission failure at this point meant they were all dead – because they currently had no hope of returning to the UK. Persona non grata.

Nico's eyes drifted to where Alex was, for once, sitting on the sofa, bent over his maths coursework. He had shown little interest in continuing his studies, but Jacobs had sat him down nearly at gun point that morning, with the ultimatum that someone was going to finish their coursework whether they liked it or not.

Unfortunately, Jacobs had also decided that Nico was the best minder and he too had been sentenced to an afternoon in the sitting room.

But that little bit of structure had to be a good thing. Even if they were stuck in the country for years – and god, did Nico hope it wasn't that long – there was something to be said for having purpose. Duties. A sense of accomplishment.

Alex sighed loudly, but didn't look up from his laptop.

The one piece of normality from their previous lives.

There were no reports to be read. No updates on movement in their area. No signals that anyone had successfully tracked their movements. Nothing but bored soldiers.

And Nico had to admit, bored soldiers weren't exactly good things to have.

They just had to keep up appearances that they were a perfectly normal group of gringo tourists that had decided to stay local. Easier said than done when their neighbor wanted to chat them up at every opportunity.

Alex typed something harshly into the laptop, before snapping the lid shut. He sent Nico a wary look. "That's all my tutor gave me last month," he said, seeming to dare Nico to argue with him.

Looking for a fight.

Nico held back a sigh, he wasn't going to give one to him. Of course, that was the problem with forcing coursework on Alex – they didn't have an unlimited supply. No one had planned for him to go off the grid for months on end. "You've got other courses?"

Alex shrugged, dumped the laptop on the table, and slouched into the sofa. "All I've got is science. English and lit were supposed to be reviewed last week, so nothing new." He waved his hand in the direction of the table. "And government is pointless."

Nico raised an eyebrow. "Pointless?" That seemed a little harsh, even for Alex's normally pessimistic viewpoint.

Alex picked at a thread on his shirt. "Well, it's not like I've got much of a chance of that helping me in the future. UK Government," he scoffed, then peered deliberately at Nico. "You don't think this is magically going to be over one day, do you?"

"Yes." He didn't even hesitate. He couldn't afford it. If everyone lost hope, then they were really sunk. He just hadn't thought Alex was quite to that point already. "They're not going to forget about us."

"They're not going to forget about you, you mean."

Nico jerked back. "What?"

"You don't understand them. They've done all this," He waved a hand around at the room. "Because they have to keep up appearances. But I'm just a mistake that they've had to keep cleaning up after."

That was more words in a row than Alex had said in over two weeks. And all of them were laced with the cold hard finality that he was alone. Alone in a house of soldiers. "You have us." That was met with an eyeroll, so Nico diverted. "And you have that agent, Ben, wasn't it? He helped us get here. He doesn't seem like to type to just forget about you." Nico wasn't about to mention the mysterious Jones, though it was clear that whoever she was, was Ben's superior. Someone high up in MI6.

"Ben doesn't understand. He just sees a kid." Alex pressed his fingertips to his eyelids. "You all just see a kid."

But that's what you are. Nico didn't say it aloud. Alex had made it more than clear that he disliked being called a kid. He was independent. Completely resistant to any suggestion that he couldn't do something. Shouldn't do something.

"Well… except for Jones," Alex added softly. "She knows she screwed up and created this mess."

And what exactly this mess was, they still didn't know. Alex had been cagey on the details the entire time. Just some terrorist organization after Project PRISM files, that were somehow connected to Alex, by threads he wasn't willing to give up. "So… if she made the mess, she's working to clean it up."

Alex snorted and blinked his eyes open to stare at Nico. "You really don't get how things work in MI6."

"Then explain it."

That seemed to catch Alex off guard, but he quickly plastered an annoyed expression on his face. "MI6 doesn't really care about their own. It's only when they mess up and create an international spectacle that they remember they exist. Even then, recovery time is just an option and if something more pressing comes up, well, it doesn't really matter whether they're in tip top shape or not." He shrugged carelessly. "The same goes for teenagers that get trapped into the wrong situation, time and time again, scraping by with the tiniest bit of luck. Once that luck runs out, well, then you're on your own. It's your own fault and there's nothing anyone can do to help you anymore."

Nico stared, trying to parse out the meaning in the words. The hidden meaning. Because that wasn't straightforward Alex-speak. That was long repressed loathing toward a system that had seemed to be tightly woven into his very existence for the past several months. It was personal. "So… you think your luck is out?"

"I know my luck is out. It's been out for more than the past twelve months."

Twelve months.

The only thing was, they hadn't met twelve months ago. Barely six months ago, if you squinted at it right. Which meant that those thoughts and feelings were connected to something that had happened long before any of them had ever met. And whatever it was, Alex was clearly reluctant to reveal – whether because it was shame or because someone more powerful had threatened him, there was no telling.

Nico swallowed. "But… you didn't ask for these terrorists to come after you."

Alex laughed, cold and heartless. "Whatever helps you sleep at night. But this is all my fault Nico. It has been ever since the beginning. If I hadn't…" He cut himself off and looked away. "If I could go back and keep fourteen-year-old me from ever inves—I mean, keep him from doing the wrong things, I would."

Those were not the words of a teenager. Not any that Nico had met. Those were the words of someone who took the guilt of everything and placed it on himself. "It's not like you went out searching for trouble."

Alex blanched and pushed up from the sofa. "Don't pretend you understand."

Nico just stared at him as he left. It wasn't like he went searching for trouble, right?

A mug clinked against the counter and Nico glanced up. Cameron. Off the night shift.

Alex was the only one of them that had any shot at a normal sleep schedule and even he didn't seem to take advantage of it half the time.

Cameron poured the last of the tea out, then joined Nico at the table. They were all looking a little scruffy around the edges now. Just another thing that would have to be addressed if – when – they finally went home.

"Quiet night?" Nico asked.

Cameron shrugged, then ran a hand over his face. "Kid was up half the night."

And clearly, no one actually staying in the room with Alex had realized it… Nico blew out a breath. "You were supposed to have good news for me." While there were many perfectly logical reasons for Alex to be awake most the night… logical didn't seem to apply to him most of the time. "I don't suppose he told you why he was up?"

Cameron snorted. "The moment he volunteers any information without us pulling it out of him, I'm checking him for drugs."

Which, fair enough. Alex had kept them at even more of an arm's length since they fled the country, but he hadn't exactly been chatty before that. It wasn't a good sign though. If they had lost the little bit of comradery they had, there was no telling when Alex would make his next move – for better or for worse, and most likely without them.

"If we move now, might be able to curb the restlessness for a bit." Cameron traced a pattern on the table, before looking up and meeting Nico's eyes. "He's got a self-sacrificial streak a mile wide and we need time to get through his thick skull again."

That was probably half the reason for all the outings. Though they were no doubt teaching Alex useful skills about getting out and about in the local area, there was the hope that maybe, if he didn't feel so restricted, he wouldn't be as tempted to do something stupid. Though from his conversation with Alex just a few days earlier, he wasn't quite sure what might get through to him at this point. "A bigger place might be good."

"The shared room does have its advantages," Cameron pointed out.

"But I had no clue he was up half the night," Nico said. It was a shared space and Alex hadn't made any attempts at claiming it. Hell, he spent half the nights on the sofa. He didn't like showing any vulnerability, but had for some reason decided that sleeping in the open was better than sharing. It was probably a psychological thing.

"We can head further inland, not as easy to disappear, but… We'll all look more out of place, but there are still some tourist towns. We should be able to find something…" He trailed off; lips down-turned in an unhappy expression. "We've only got so much money and this is… indefinite. We need to start bringing in money."

God, money.

They were all so used to the nearly unlimited coffers provided when on mission. No expense too large – within reason, of course. They always had what they needed to get the job done and nothing more, but never worried about not having a secure place to crash.

"And you're proposing, what…?" Nico certainly didn't have a head for business and opportunity. Jacobs probably didn't either, since many of his skills laid in patching people up. If he was thinking manual work, Mickey and Cameron might be able to find something, but… they'd be up against everyone and his brother trying to find work in the country. Undocumented work wasn't usually easy to come by.

"Native English speakers are sought after like the plague here," Cameron said, "Families want their children to speak perfect English, to pass their exams with flying colors, so they can go to university in the US or the UK. And a lot of people are willing to pay out of pocket, no questions asked."

Now there was a thought. Teaching English wasn't entirely out of their wheelhouse. They had all done bits here and there, working with local liaisons, providing conversational partners. But it required a relationship. Something that had to be built. It wasn't likely to just appear overnight. "But if we move…"

"If we move, we'll have to start making those connections immediately. Find reputable employers that won't ask too many questions."

Easier said than done.

"I'd send you or Jacobs first, to be honest. Or we'll risk raising the wrong type of attention."

Because people were intimidated by Mickey's height. And Cameron wasn't much better. "You've talked to them?"

Cameron shrugged. "They don't like it."

Of course they didn't. Here they were, a unit of highly trained specialist soldiers from the UK, looking at teaching English just to be able to keep a roof over their heads. They were all operating under a situation that was so far out from the norm of what their training dictated. There was no telling what would come next, where the next threat would be, what Alex's next move would be.

"We have no choi—"

"NO!"

The yell was unmistakable. Alex.

Nico didn't even think twice, just bolted out of his seat toward the bedroom. Cameron wasn't far behind.

"Just-! No!" Alex yelled, again.

The scene that greeted them was not expected. Mickey had Alex pinned to the floor, though that pin was rather unwieldy. He was clearly trying not to hurt Alex, but Alex was wrestling and fighting, giving as good as he got. He probably would've already twisted out of Mickey's grip, if it weren't for their weight difference.

But Mickey was trying not to hurt him…

"Hey!" Cameron shouted, doing a terrifying impression of their drill sergeant. "What the ever-loving hell is going on here?"

Mickey jerked his head toward the partially open window – which they had all deemed as being too small for Alex – and narrowly dodged Alex's attempt at headbutting his nose. "Would you just stop?"

"Would love to," Alex growled, twisting to the side and nearly breaking Mickey's hold. "That was the plan." He threw his head back again, this time smashing into Mickey's face with a crunch.

Nico stepped forward, not entirely sure what his plan was, but doing something… Stopping them. Helping them.

Mickey stopped trying to be gentle once there was blood running down his face. "Yeah, how about not that plan then," he snarled, gripping Alex's arms and pinning them to the small of his back. Alex bucked, but Cameron stepped in, a pair of cuffs appearing and snapping shut around his wrists.

The cuffs seemed to do the trick, because Alex froze.

Mickey let go and sat back on his heels, wiping the blood off his face. "And now, I'll let you explain your so carefully thought-out plan to your guardian."

Nico blanched at that. Because yeah, he was still the guardian in this picture. And Alex was clearly going off the rails if he was trying to leave via the bedroom window.

"You all are idiots." Jacobs shoved past Nico into the bedroom and took one look at Alex, pale and panting, on the floor. "Get him up or he'll try suffocating on us. He still has bad ribs, no matter how he pretends."

Alex glared as Cameron manhandled him into an upright position. "I don't need your help."

Jacobs just snorted and crouched down in front of Alex. He grabbed Alex's chin to examine the blooming bruise on his jaw. "Sure, say that when you're not being locked up to save you from your own stupidity." He glanced at the cuffs knowingly. "What happened to that promise to talk before you did something rash again? Wasn't nearly dying because of your supposed informant enough?"

Alex flinched at that, but his eyes darted away. "Doesn't matter anymore," he spat.

"Hmm…" Jacobs turned to give Mickey a once over, then motioned him out of the room. "Let's get you cleaned up." He sent a pointed glance at Nico, but Nico wasn't sure how to interpret it.

Alex pressed against the wall, face set in a scowl. "You can just… leave me alone and go back to your regularly scheduled programming."

Nico raised a careful eyebrow, before settling down on the floor across from Alex. He had expected to feel angry that Alex had attempted to leave again. Instead, he just felt resigned. They were all playing a waiting game and they knew it. "We're not leaving you alone." Especially not in cuffs.

Cameron settled against the wall; arms crossed across his chest.

Alex's anger was still simmering though. Resentment at being caught. "You don't get it."

And no, he didn't. He didn't understand why Alex was so insistent to get away. It had been the same tune he had sung months earlier – but Nico thought they had built some bridges when they removed the memory device. Found some trust and acceptance. "Then why don't you make us understand?"

"And you'll what, keep me in cuffs all the time?" Alex bit out.

Nico shrugged, the appearance of calm on his face. He wasn't going to rise to Alex's bait, but he was certainly going to take advantage of the hair trigger he was on. "What have we so erroneously missed in our judgement of your character these past several months?" There was the little fact that he acted like an escape artist at times, but it didn't make him bad.

"I…" Alex's eyes darted between Nico and Cameron, before fixating on a spot off in the distance.

"You think we missed something major, so what is it? Come on," Nico pressed, trying to find that infinitesimally small chink in the armor. There were a few buttons that always served to get a rise out of him… "All I see is a kid that's in over his head."

Alex's gaze snapped to his with a heated glare. "I'm. Not. A kid."

Nico shrugged. "Prove it."

"I don't need to prove anything to you!" Alex pulled at the cuffs – he was going to have more bruises if he didn't stop.

"You're telling us to give up, aren't you?" Nico settled into his spot. As long as Alex was still talking, there was still hope.

"It doesn't matter!" Alex shook his head and kept tugging on a wrist. The cuffs weren't likely to break.

"If it doesn't matter, then why do you try so hard to hide it?"

"I was a spy!" Alex's face immediately blanched, but his attempts to get away became even more desperate.

A spy.

But surely no one would take a teenager as a spy…?

Alex clearly believed that he was telling the absolute truth – and it wasn't something he had intended on sharing.

"So, there, let me go!" He shouted.

He was going to rip his wrists to shreds and then Jacobs would be unhappy with all of them.

Nico reached out and placed a hand on Alex's leg and was rewarded with another freeze. At least it meant he stopped struggling. "Okay, you were a spy." It seemed so utterly impossible, yet, at the same time made a lot of sense. It explained the terrorists' interest in him. Not because of a connection to a family member, but to him. Directly.

"I…" Alex's eyes darted back to Cameron – implacable as always – before coming back to Nico. "You think that's normal."

"Do I believe that you were put in that situation?" Nico weighed his words carefully. It was almost too far fetched an explanation. But Alex wasn't pulling desperation ruses, not now. It left an uneasy feeling in his stomach, because it was one thing for a teenager to volunteer. It was a completely different matter to think that an intelligence agency had decided to take on a sixteen-year-old operative. Or younger. "You haven't lied to me before." Left details out, for sure, but outright lying just wasn't Alex.

Alex flinched. "I… I was a spy. Stupid fourteen-year-old me."

Fourteen. Nico didn't let himself glance at Cameron, he knew what he would see there. The absolute horror that a kid had been pulled into the very underbelly of society. There was nothing innocent about that and it explained so much.

"I should've died ten times over. Would've been better." Alex set his jaw and looked away. "But then I decided to go join a terrorist group at fifteen, because a dying assassin told me it was my destiny. They just wanted me under their thumb, like everyone else."

Nico studied Alex's face closely. Still not lies, but still not the entire story. Not if MI6 was so desperate to keep him alive now. And Alex was definitely not an unbiased story teller. Whatever truths he gave them were the ones that he felt would be the most likely to get him out – or killed. It was all manipulation. "And MI6 protects you now."

"I turned on them once, what's to keep that from happening again?" There was a distinctly bitter note to his voice. "It has never gone back to normal and people keep winding up dead. This is all my fault and we've just been dragging things on for the past six months." Alex looked at him with a desperate expression, tugging on the cuffs once more. "Let me go before I destroy everything you've ever worked for."

"No."

Alex's head whipped around to look at Cameron.

Cameron just kept glaring at the floorboards. "No, we're not just going to let you go prance off into self-martyrdom."

Good.

"I don't care what you think you've done or caused, we've all but broken our oaths, just to keep you safe. You're a good kid, we've all seen that. Whatever happened in the past is important to know, but won't change what our goal is."

Alex's jaw worked for a moment, before settling into a mulish expression. "Just like that?"

"No," Cameron crouched down and shook Alex's shoulder slightly. "You're going to sit here and tell us the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, and we'll decide what the next steps will be. If you'd feel safer with only one companion…" Cameron grimaced, the shrugged. "Then we'll figure something out and split up. But we're not leaving you alone for those tossers to come off you as they please."

And if Cameron said so, the others would be on board. If the other two reacted with nothing less than the shock and horror Nico felt, they were all going to be on the same page. MI6 hadn't done enough to get Alex out, so it was up to them to keep him safe until someone made a break in the case.

Cameron peered down at Alex's hands, before nodding to himself. "Now, I'm going to get Jacobs to come and take a look at your wrists, but I'm not letting you out of those until you've proven to me that you're not going to try breaking my men again."

There was no mistaking what Alex thought of that plan, but he didn't say anything.

Cameron clapped Nico on the shoulder as he left the room. "Tonight, we're getting some real answers."

Nico tried to give Alex a reassuring smile, but really, he was just as glad to finally be getting somewhere. Now it all depended on how well they could trust Alex's statements.

A/N: He's coming clean! More or less. Really though, it's Alex. How much is he actually going to tell them... Thoughts and predictions welcome!