Gwen and Leon had been pouring over trade route maps since dawn, taking their breakfast together. Formulating plans to protect supply lines with the impending war was not a task she had ever expected to be responsible for, but Leon was fortunately well-trained in the effort. She more than once wished Arthur and Morgana were there. While she trusted Leon, she was not the person who should be making these decisions. The dark thought crept into her mind again, that dreadful fear that lived in her chest, the one that worried Morgana wouldn't be coming back, that their luck in dealing with Morgause's treachery had finally run out.
How could Arthur possibly cope with her loss, the only family he had left? She blinked away tears, trying to refocus her attention on Leon. Just as she was about to suggest they take a break, she heard the signal announcing the king's return. She and Leon exchanged a worried look and rushed to the gate.
Gwen spotted Morgana, dismounting from the horse with Merlin's assistance. She didn't release his hand, to Gwen's relief. She's returned to us.
Relieved, Gwen ignored decorum and hugged Morgana so tightly she thought she might break her. Morgana didn't mind, and hugged her back just as fiercely.
"Come, let's get you cleaned up, we still have so much to do before your wedding," Gwen said, finally letting her go.
"I believe that was technically called off. Aren't you supposed to be marrying my brother instead?" Morgana teased.
"Well, yes, but don't you want to marry Merlin again now that the spell is broken?" Gwen asked, worriedly.
Morgana hugged her again, reassuring her. "We already took care of it ourselves, and good thing too, I believe it prevented that spell from taking me over. No, you and Arthur should still wed. We can celebrate both of our marriages. Did you get a dress made?"
"Working on it. It's all so very fast," Gwen said, worriedly. "Everyone will think I'm with child."
"Nonsense! Marriage before a war is common, and our king needs to produce an heir who isn't his older sister. Unless you'd rather wait? Tournaments held in your honor and all that."
"Certainly not," Gwen said. "Arthur would insist, but frankly I'd really rather not. We can speak more of this later, more pressing matters. As soon as you've gotten settled in, I need to speak with you and Arthur, about Agravaine. In private."
"Of course. Can we do it while we take our meal? I am famished," Morgana asked.
"I am sure Aithusa is too. She's been a very picky eater since you've been gone," Gwen said.
"Poor baby. She missed her mama!" Morgana said, and quickened her steps so she could find her dragon.
. . .
After feeding Aithusa, Morgana washed quickly and Eilidh helped her dress, wrestling her into a dress that felt entirely too tight. "Ouch! Eilidh, do be careful," Morgana said, as the girl laced her bodice. Aithusa hissed.
"Begging your pardon, Milady. Did I hurt you?" the girl asked, confused, looking at the dragon warily.
"No, it's just... you laced me so tightly, my chest is hurting," she said, wincing.
"Apologies, Milady, I'll loosen the laces. But I haven't laced you any tighter than normal. Are ye starting your bleeding, Milady? Same happens to me when I do," Eilidh said, loosening the lacing around the bodice.
"Oh, of course, that must be it," Morgana said, unable to remember when last she'd bled.
"Dinner is in His Majesty's chambers, as Lady Gwen requested," Eilidh said, giving a curtsey and leaving.
Morgana looked at herself in the mirror, and touched her breasts, which looked bigger to her.
Merlin walked into the room to find her with her hands on her breasts.
"Need an extra hand with that?" he grinned.
"Have I gained weight?" Morgana asked, examining her reflection in the mirror.
"I am far too fond of my head to answer that in any way other than, 'As always, my beautiful wife, you are a vision of perfection,'" Merlin said, wrapping his arms around her from behind and kissing her neck. "Are you ready for lunch?"
"Not if you keep doing that," she smiled. "Come, Husband, the King awaits."
. . .
Gwen explained the news about Agravaine and Mithian.
"So, he was under a love spell as well? I honestly would have thought the opposite," Merlin said.
"I thought he was acting strange myself. Quite out of character, frankly," Arthur said.
Gwen shrugged. "That's the interesting thing, Mithian claims there was no spell; he truly loves her. He knew right away what she'd done when he was arrested, because no one else had access to his seal. But he was prepared to be found guilty of treason, even executed, to not implicate her."
"I honestly would never have expected it. In my visions of Agravaine, he had been only self-interested and ambitious, and bent on destroying Uther's legacy. Perhaps I corrupted him more than I realized," Morgana said. She frowned, thinking about how, in her vision, she had also coerced Mithian into betraying Arthur. Morgause's plan had been exceptionally cruel, however. "It is heartbreaking that he loves her so and she loves him not."
"Indeed, and I assume that marriage will be annulled when they reach Nemeth. But at least we know Agravaine didn't betray us," Arthur said. "After the war, his name will be cleared."
"In the meantime, we have to keep up the ruse. Morgause will expect that Nemeth will not let the soldiers through from Gaul, and we will continue to let her think that until it is too late. In return, we have to find those poppets and, I suppose, unlink them somehow," Gwen said. "I gave Mithian and Agravaine my word that we would protect them, and Nemeth. We need them, and they need us."
Arthur took her hand and kissed it. "Very wise, My Queen." She suppressed a smile.
Merlin sighed. "I just wish she had come to us instead of allowing herself to be blackmailed into a complicated marriage and betrayal scheme. We probably don't even need the poppet. Those are spells easily broken by any proficient sorcerer. I suggest we send Mordred and Kara to Nemeth after the wedding and they can handle it."
"Speaking of the wedding, we've now covered the more pressing matters, so how are those plans progressing?" Morgana asked.
"Are you really sure you want us to take over your preparations? You put so much work into the wedding!" Gwen said.
"You put in far more work than we did, Gwen," Morgana grinned. "We will still say our vows again at the sunset ceremony as we'd planned with Aglain, with just an intimate group. Then, you'll have your wedding the next day. We can share the banquet. I see no reason to make you wait to be wed."
"Celebrating our marriage at the same time as our two dearest friends, we'd be honored," Merlin agreed.
Arthur nodded. "I agree. The threat of war reminds us that we should hold on to our joy and happiness where we can find it. Life and love are fragile."
"The kingdom needs a queen in these difficult times. They will look to you for comfort and strength during the battle ahead," Morgana said, taking her hand and giving it a light squeeze.
"I am grateful for you, Morgana," Gwen said, smiling with tears in her eyes.
Arthur agreed, "As am I, Sister. We just might survive this war because of your actions."
Morgana smiled teary-eyed at them both, feeling a deep gratitude that she lived in a reality where her brother and soon-to-be sister-in-law loved her.
Merlin kissed Morgana on the temple. "Come, my love, we have work to do. If there's one thing I realized by confronting Morgause, it's that my battle magic could use some work."
"As could mine. I've focused most of my studies on the art of healing, and not enough on fighting. Arthur, I'm afraid Merlin won't be training with the knights any longer, we'll train with the full use of our magic, instead," Morgana said.
"I think that's best. Merlin is really quite terrible with a sword, it's demoralizing for the knights, and while humorous, distracts from my training," Arthur smirked.
"Oh, you're still training to be a prat? I thought you'd have mastered it by now," Merlin grinned, as he and Morgana left Arthur's chambers, narrowly avoiding the cup his brother-in-law threw at his head.
. . .
"I don't want to hurt you," Merlin frowned.
Morgana put her hands on her hips. "Really, Merlin. You aren't going to hurt me. And if you do, you can heal me. This is important."
He sighed. "Okay, let's try again."
They sparred in the field, a combination of practice swords and magic. Morgana was able to disarm Merlin nearly every time, and it was obvious he was holding back.
"This isn't working. I'm going to get Mordred," she said irritably.
She mentally called for Mordred, who soon came from the knights' practice yard.
Against Mordred, Merlin finally stopped holding back. Mordred was an excellent swordsman, and extremely agile, but Merlin was incredibly powerful. Merlin had just cornered Mordred and he was about to yield when Morgana knocked Merlin back with a powerful spell.
She rushed forward with her practice sword, and before she could hit him, he pushed her back with a counter-spell. "Harder!" she shouted, her eyes flashing with gold and fury. "Don't hold back because I'm a woman! I'm not holding back! Morgause certainly won't!"
Merlin struggled to stand and raised his practice sword and struck back. She hit him full force with her practice sword and knocked his legs out from under him. With him flat on his back, she pressed the practice sword to his throat. "Now you're dead, Emrys."
"Forþ fleoge!" he shouted, sending her flying backwards. She dropped her practice sword, and landed on her backside with a grunt. Merlin dragged himself up and walked over to her, pressing his practice sword to her stomach.
She flashed to a memory, of a vision she'd had so many years ago, of his sword piercing her abdomen.
The look of horror on her face lasted just long enough for him to realize what he'd done.
"Morgana," he gasped, flinging the practice sword to the ground and helping her up. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you. I would never hurt you."
She shook her head. "I'm fine. It's just a practice sword."
"This is why I don't want to spar with you," he said quietly. "Not because I don't think you can handle it, but because…"
"Because it would remind me of visions where you killed me. Oh, my love. I'm okay, truly," she said, kissing him gently.
He nodded, still looking unconvinced.
"We can't let our fears get the best of us. We need to be at our best, so we can win this war," she said firmly. "That's all that matters."
They trained the rest of the afternoon, and came away with several bruises.
"Go see Kara about your face, Mordred," Morgana said, pointing to what would surely be a black eye that she had given him.
"You could heal it yourself, but you just want me to tell her who gave it to me," he pouted.
"Nonsense, Kara can always use the practice. Besides, I know how much you like spending time with my pretty ward," she said with a grin.
He blushed and quickly left.
"You're sure I didn't hurt you?" Merlin asked, worried.
"You only knocked me off my feet the one time, Merlin, I'm fine. You did well today," she said, taking his arm. "I could use a hot bath though, I'm quite sore."
"I think I'll join you," he said, groaning in pain.
"Oh? In that case, I expect a massage," she said with a grin.
"Only if you return the favor. You really are quite tough," he complained.
. . .
Morgana leaned against Merlin's chest in the tub, the hot water soothing her sore muscles. He worked on massaging her hamstrings.
"You're sure you're okay? I knocked you back pretty hard," Morgana asked.
"I've been knocked down sparring many times. Trust me, Arthur has never held back with me," he sighed.
"It's been awhile since I've had the pleasure. Uther would've thrown him in the dungeon if he'd actually hurt me sparring, so he was quite careful once we were adults. When we were still children though, he had to give it all he had to best me, and often he still couldn't," she smiled at the memory.
The thought made him smile too. "What was he like as a child? Was he terribly insufferable?"
"Often, certainly. But I suppose so was I, just in different ways. He was spoiled and arrogant, and I was spoiled and morose. We were quite a force to be reckoned with by our caregivers."
"I think I would have liked you anyway," he smiled.
"Gwen did, at least. Or she was polite enough to not let me know she didn't. She's always been the same, as good, kind and no-nonsense as she is now. And what were you like as a child?" she asked.
"Much different. I didn't have many friends, and tried to keep to myself. I wasn't always in control of my magic, and it made me very nervous. Worried my mother half to death. I was afraid for her too. That's why I was eager to leave for Camelot. I felt I could blend in better, hide in plain sight."
"Well, you were sure wrong about that. You couldn't even blend in on your first day here," she laughed.
Merlin groaned, remembering the fight with Arthur that ended with him in a cell, and eventually the stocks.
She smiled wistfully, remembering the first time she saw him from her window. "I noticed you right away. I thought you were incredibly brave for standing up to Arthur like that. Even more so when you knew who he was."
"Brave? Or a complete idiot?"
"Why not both?" she laughed. "It worked out though."
"It did," he said, running his fingers over the ring on her left hand. "I still can't believe my good fortune."
"Don't be so happy. I might still die on a battlefield in a few weeks," she said, trying to joke, but her own voice sounding flat.
"I don't believe that," he said, kissing her shoulder. He felt her shiver at the contact, and continued kissing across her shoulder. "I've seen the future myself. I saw it in the Crystal Cave."
Her voice trembled as she whispered, "What did you see?"
"The child you would bear me," he said, pulling her closer. "The future I desperately want."
She felt tears stinging her eyes as she turned to look at him. "I've seen her too. She has your eyes. She's beautiful."
"Because she looks like you," he said, kissing her. "And you are the most beautiful woman I've ever laid eyes on." He kissed her again heatedly, and pulled her onto his lap to straddle him, giving little care to the water splashing over the sides of the tub onto the floor. There was nothing a little magic couldn't fix.