This chapter took me SO long. I'm so tired of it that I don't even want to talk about it anymore. It's a hack job of a chapter that gave me much trouble and when I finished it, I didn't even proofread it. I just wanted to post it to be rid of it. Not to ruin your reading enjoyment of course!
Please leave a review if you can. You can also find this at AO3 under the same pen name.
Thanks!

CHAPTER 39

I walked down the grounds towards the gates of Hogwarts, eager to go. I never before felt so relieved to leave the school behind me for a week at home. Most of the time (ergo; all of the time) I didn't even go home for Easter but Hogwarts had become near unbearable recently. Besides, I wasn't actually going home anyway. I was going to visit Grandfather.

I dearly hoped he hadn't told mum. It didn't seem likely, they didn't really talk at all, mostly mum's doing (although he didn't put any effort of his own in anyway), so for him to catch her long enough to say that I'd spend the week with him through Easter was seemingly impossible. Also, if he had told her, I would've gotten a letter from her already. Or a Howler. But still. Stranger things had happened.

Most students leaving the school over break had already left, taking the Hogwarts Express towards London in the morning but since Grandfather resided in Scotland it made very little sense to take the train to London only to come back again right after.

Hogwarts had gone upside down in the past weeks. Marietta had been in the Hospital Wing constantly, an expert from St Mungo's even coming in to see her, but it was all a blessing in disguise because the student body was swarming for any news and in the infirmary she'd be safe from snooping (Madam Pomfrey made sure of it). Some people would ask us, as Marietta's dorm mates, about what had happened but soon enough that stopped as it became apparent we knew nothing. All attention after that was once again solely on Harry Potter. How people found out that apparently only Marietta and Potter knew what had happened that evening I don't know.

Also, Gryffindor suddenly took a big dive in house points. It didn't seem quite Umbridge's style; she seemed to go straight for her detentions. Besides, the points were taken sporadically throughout the weeks and not at once.

After that night, Umbridge was suddenly the new head mistress of Hogwarts. The rumour was that Dumbledore had been arrested for treason against the wizarding community. Or more like they had tried to arrest him but that he had done some Merlinian wizardry, stunned Minister Fudge and disapparated out of Hogwarts, despite the fact that disapparation out of Hogwarts was impossible. Other versions of the gossip described him escaping on the back of a dragon while others said he hadn't escaped at all but had transfigured himself into a dust speck so the Aurors couldn't find him anymore. All agreed though that the Ministry of Magic had tried to arrest Dumbledore and that Dumbledore had evaded that arrest. What the Ministry had tried to arrest him for, nobody seemed to have any clue about, although "being disruptive" seemed to be the least crazy of suggestions heard in the days after his disappearance from the school.

As head mistress Umbridge quite immediately started a new system of order in the school in the form of (and simultaneously enforced by) the Inquisitorial Squad. In name they were supposed to support the High Inquisitor (now also head mistress) in her duties but in practice they seemed to be all Slytherin students who took great pleasure out of their new found power.

Through it all I had just tried to keep my head down and make the most of it till the spring holidays and now they had finally arrived. At least now I could leave Hogwarts for the week. Breathe in peace for a week. If Grandfather permitted it. I had tried not to think about what this week would be like. My mum's voice floated about my mind whispering 'He ruined mine and your aunt's childhood. I didn't start making happy memories until I left for Hogwarts.'.

I looked around myself. I was still at the Hogwarts gates and although it was hard to say, Reekes Manor should be about halfway between Hogwarts and Glasgow, very roughly speaking. I had debated getting the Knight Bus but it was a bit more expensive and it got you a bit nauseous so instead I walked to the Hogsmeade town hall, hoping to floo to Glasgow. I had never visited his place without my parents and brother and definitely never out of school. I wasn't sure what to expect. I wasn't even entirely sure where it was exactly, really, having never gone by myself. I just had an address.

Arriving in Glasgow I wasn't quite sure how to proceed. Reekes Manor was protected against intruders, so I wasn't able to just floo inside, so I hoped I could get in through the front gates. I sighed, feeling a bit overwhelmed for a moment as I stood between the busy Saturday shopping crowd in Glasgow's wizarding main street. I had never gone out on my own without friends or family like this before. Not outside of Diagon Alley.

I didn't know Glasgow town very well, I only ever passed through on my way to or from Grandfather's, but it seemed lively and vibrant, the wizarding street snaking its way through the Muggle centre, winding below and above street level, shops and pubs overflowing with business.

A little girl whined for a sugar quill while her mum pulled her forward, away from the sweets boutique. Two young wizards were laughing as they sat smoking pipes on a bench outside a shop, probably on their lunch break, great wafts of purple smoke billowing up around them. Someone in the flat above was playing the famous Not Quite Over You album by that old band the Hobgoblins with the windows open. I had no idea where to go or what to do. I let out a nervous sigh. I'd have a cup of tea, I decided. That ought to calm me down.

I went into a tiny pub just across the street from the floo hub. It was bustling inside but there was an empty table by the wall that I perched down at, asking for a cup of tea. It was mercifully warm inside, fires roaring in two hearths on opposite ends of the room. The Scottish wizards and witches were shouting at each other in a way that betrayed fondness and I just sat there quietly. I was far too English for any of this, I quickly decided.

Blowing the heat off my tea I tiredly thought back to the last weeks at school. With the spring holidays coming along it wasn't long till O.W.L.'s and N.E.W.T.'s and Mathilda was truly treasuring any moment she had with her boyfriend. She'd drag me to his classroom in between periods so she could wait outside and snog him for just a moment as he came out, before he'd rip himself away from her with a groan saying he had to get back to his textbooks.

One Sunday afternoon he and Warrington joined us in the library, equipped with their study materials, and Mathilda was delighted to have them. I watched her and Adrian as they sat closely together, not quite touching, interacting in silly gestures. He'd reach over to teasingly flip the pages before she was done reading, she'd hide his inkpot when he was too concentrated on his essay to notice. I seriously wondered how they'd both fare next year when Mathilda was still in school and Adrian would be out into the world.

Warrington had leaned over to me and made a gagging noise as we both looked at the slimily happy couple. 'No, they're sweet.' I said unsure and he chuckled. 'It's giving me a toothache.' He complained and I couldn't help laughing too at that moment. Mathilda and Adrian were too busy with each other to notice.

'So, how are you then?' He had asked after a minute. 'Still free of that ginger pest?' He added and I felt my face heating up as I shrugged. 'I suppose.' I had told him. 'You're better off.' He countered confidently. 'Maybe you should get yourself a nice Slytherin boyfriend, like your friend did.' He had added and I snorted. 'Slytherin has all the best boyfriends.' Warrington argued for his house, but it was clear that he was trying to make me laugh which I appreciated. I had remembered what he had said after he had kissed me before Christmas; he was decidedly not interested in me and it still felt clear; he was just being friendly.

I couldn't say I was quite comfortable with Cassius Warrington, he was still older, still a boy and still on the Slytherin quidditch team, but I had gotten used to him which made it slightly easier not to get into an anxious fit every time he said something worrying (and when he said something not even remotely worrying; honestly it wasn't hard to get me into a fit).

'That pin you're wearing.. Is that for that new thing Umbridge started?' I had asked him after a bit, pointedly looking at the small silver "I" that was fastened to the front of his robes. He looked down momentarily and then back up, grinning lazily, not able to hide his glee. 'Yeah. The Inquisitorial Squad.' He corrected me. I quickly noted that Adrian was wearing no such badge although I didn't remark on it.

'So, what do you do then? We have the prefect system already, don't we?' I had asked and he put down his quill, giving up continuing his essay for the moment. 'Honestly? No idea. Boss those prefects around, I suppose. Our new honourable headmistress..-' he rolled his eyes '-..wants to push her command.' He told me.

'I'm sure you won't abuse your new position.' I had said, only slightly mockingly. He had suppressed his smile. 'And just for that confidence I'll award Ravenclaw five points in your name.' He had said. I had frowned back at him. 'You can give house points?' I asked. 'And take them! I'll take those five points right back, actually.' He had said smugly. I thought that Gryffindor going down hundreds of points in those past days made a lot of sense all of a sudden.

'Are you okay, love?' A gruff, Scottish voice pierced through my ponderings and I looked up, startled from my musings. I had been in deep thought but suddenly I was back in the dingy pub in Glasgow and it turned out someone had disturbed me.

It was a friendly looking wizard, a pointy hat on his head. 'Callum, your turn!' Some of his friends shouted behind him. I looked around him to see them playing a low-key game of gobstones. He ignored them, his concerned eyes on me. 'You seem young. Are you here alone?' He asked and his questions put me on edge.

'I'm of age and I'm not alone. I'm meeting my grandfather.' I lied. He narrowed his eyes slightly and I could tell he knew I wasn't being entirely truthful, but I wasn't about to let a stranger know, good intentions or not, what my deal was.

He returned to his gobstones and I quickly finished my tea and paid so I could leave. Maybe I should just get a carriage. They were slower than the Knight Bus but also cheaper. I didn't have much money left at all and I still had to get back to Hogwarts at the end of the break. For the first time I cursed myself for buying Felix Owlbert.

I gave the witch sitting on top of the carriage the address and she looked surprised that I wanted to go there. 'The perimeters are charmed. You can't get in. It's just that moody old wizard and his crazy house elf.' She said and I blushed minimally. 'It's where I need to go.' I merely said. She sighed but then shrugged and motioned for me to get on. I did so wordlessly.

I sat in the back of the carriage in silence as we hobbled along the cobblestones towards my grandfather's manor and I huddled into my cloak as I saw the swirls of green hills and distant mountains and the blue and grey skies whizz by in a magical flurry of movement until the terrain became increasingly unmanageable, the carriage having to hop over brooks and rivers, having to squeeze through the gaps of trees in spots of forest and make its way over neglected hiker's trail, until it finally came to a halt. It had taken a while, almost forty-five minutes by my best estimate, but I was happy to keep my money.

I paid the witch and she pocketed the silver before hightailing it out of there. The air cracked as the carriage departed and left me alone on the mucky path before the gate to Reekes Manor. In the distance I saw the small castle stand bleakly amongst the sober surroundings, the impressive mountainside as a backdrop. The last time I had been here outside of Christmastime, I'd still been a child.

I stepped forward hesitantly, eyeing the gate with doubt. There was magic that only made it open for family but I wasn't sure if it was connected to the Reekes name or if it was a blood magic kind of deal. Mum was always the one to open the gate and although she was now called Wiggleswade, the house knew her still as Reekes. I, however, had never been named "Reekes".

First things first I decided to pull away the ivy that had wound itself through the cast-iron bars, making it so the gates could actually open. When the worst had gone, I took a deep breath and reached out, putting a single finger to the cold surface. For a second I thought nothing would happen but then the iron started to creak and the gates swung open. A grin spread on my face. 'What do you know, I'm family enough!' I muttered as I picked up my bag, walking on.

Unlike last time I had been here, it now was a careful spring. Grass springing from the earth, hopeful little flowers rearing their heads, the rocky terrain muddy and wet. I nearly slipped down the path twice as I walked to the castle. I saw a thin string of smoke come from somewhere within the castle walls and I picked up my step. A fireplace to warm myself by seemed like the best thing to look forward to. Spring might be here but Scotland remained as brisk as it had been.

I crossed the drawbridge and noted that unlike in winter, when everything was muted and quiet, there were sounds all around me now. I heard frogs croak, birds chirp and the water in the dull moat babbled. I looked over the edge and saw fish ripple through.

When inside the castle walls I took a moment to collect my nerves. Grandfather was a scary wizard, judgemental and authoritative, so even though I was invited, I felt far from welcome. I sighed, tightening my grip on my bag, and stepped out from underneath the fortification and into the courtyard, decidedly making my way up to the front door. I bit my lip and rapped my knuckles against the heavy wood. It was barely a second before the door swung open, Grandfather's house elf Krinkly bowing deeply before me. 'Mistress Cecilia!' He exclaimed. His large ears flapped up and down as his back shot back upright. 'The Master has been waiting for you.' He squeaked. He moved aside hurriedly so I could go in. The door closed behind me.

Krinkly snapped his long fingers and my cloak flew off my shoulders into his arms, almost burying him underneath it. I took off my hat myself, peeling my gloves off after. I kept my Ravenclaw scarf wrapped around my neck. It was a chilly old house. 'The Master is in the drawing room.' Krinkly said, although I could've guessed; it was the only furnished room left pretty much.

I put down my bag, feeling serious doubt about the whole enterprise but it also felt as if it was too late to back down. My grandfather was waiting for me down the bare, though stately, hallway. I put a foot forward and then another and kept it up until I was in front of the drawing room door, knocking. 'Come in.' I heard the booming voice of Malcolm Reekes call out and I pushed down the handle, going into the room. 'Welcome.' Grandfather said to me.

The room was as it had been during Christmas. The silk wallpaper, the old furniture, the rows of paintings displaying sleeping Reekes ancestors. The only difference was that through the large windows this time I didn't see a snowy stretch of nothing but a lush, wet garden. I remembered it well from when I used to come as a child.

Grandmother had still been alive at the time and mum hadn't yet so severely cut them out of her, our, life yet. We would visit over the summer mostly. In most of my memories Aidan was in Hogwarts already so during the schoolyear we couldn't come (or that was my mum's excuse anyway) but in the summer Aidan and I would run through the endless gardens, hide under bushes, pick up sticks and pretend to be in great magical duels.

Aidan, being quite a deal older than I, would dictate to me what games we'd play. He'd call himself the star Seeker for England and I'd be the snitch and I'd shriek and laugh as he ran after me. At the time I thought I was very fast, evading him so long, but later on I realised that Aidan just let me escape over and over again. He always made sure I had fun.

We'd catch fairies and built them homes out of twigs and moss, we'd teach the Jarveys rude words (although they knew most of them already), we'd find vole holes and camp outside waiting for them to come out, and once in a while we found a gnome, although we saw very little of them, and we'd swing it across the stream that ran down the mountain. Aidan swore that they couldn't swim so it couldn't come back.

I had very happy memories coming here and although the garden was still recovering from winter, the leaves new and small and the flowers only sprouting, it made me excited to go out and see more of it. I tore my eyes away from the windows, looking at where Grandfather was seated in his high-backed armchair.

'Thank you for inviting me.' I said timidly as I shuffled up to him, leaning over so I could kiss him on both cheeks, as I had done since I was a child. 'How is my granddaughter doing?' He asked and I tried to smile but I was afraid it came off a bit more like a grimace. 'I'm doing well, Grandfather.' I answered him. I sat down on the sofa.

For a moment it was quiet. It was usually dad who started conversation. He'd ask Grandfather about some of the business ventures he was on or maybe about one of the paintings on the wall, even though the paintings were always the same. I kept my mouth shut. Fortunately, Grandfather broke through the silence by asking me how my trip up here had gone.

'It was fine. I have my own pouch of floo powder so I flooed to Glasgow from Hogsmeade and took a carriage the rest of the way.' I told him. He hummed in approval. 'The carriages are a great mode of transport. They are a bit slower than, say, the Knight Bus, but they are private which is invaluable.' He said in a way that suggested that the Knight Bus was invested with vermin. 'I suppose.' I agreed out of politeness.

It was quiet for another moment. 'I assume you would like to freshen up. Krinkly will take you to your room.' Grandfather said. He snapped his fingers and Krinkly appeared by my side with a faint popping noise and I jumped in fright to have him next to me so suddenly. 'Take Cecilia up to her room.' Grandfather commanded the house elf and it bowed once again so low that its ears swept the floor. 'Why of course, Master, immediately.' He answered.

I walked after the elf and together we made our way back to the Entrance Hall and up the staircase to the first floor. For the first time I wondered where I'd stay. Although I assumed my grandfather had a bed to sleep in, most of the house was stripped bare. The lonely exception to that was the drawing room that was there to keep up appearances presumably, but everything else I'd seen of the house was empty. I had never stayed the night before.

Down the corridor from the stairs there was one closed door that Krinkly swung open and when I walked in, I was surprised to see it held furniture. It wasn't a lot, but it looked comfortable and pleasant enough, so I smiled as I thanked Krinkly. 'Call Krinkly if the Mistress needs anything at all.' The elf told me, and I assured him I would. He disappeared with another pop and I turned to the room.

It was quite a large room and I guessed it would've been a study of some kind in the olden days; there were built in bookcases against the back walls next to the door. There was nothing on them now except one small, rather dried out potted plant.

Stepping further into the room I inspected the furniture, a simple bed, wardrobe and bedside table as well as a chair, and realised that it must've been bought recently. All the furniture in the house (or the little that was left at least) was centuries old, made of dark heavy wood and it was all well taken care of. These, instead, were made from a light oak, beat up (so probably second-hand) and it looked small and out of place in the room. Did Grandfather get it especially, so I'd have a place to sleep?

Though, the room was very light, feeling bright and fresh, the large windows facing the gardens and although the weather was dull and grey, it still looked spectacular. It was much muddier and a lot less green than it would be in summer, or later in the spring, but I could clearly see the shape the landscape would take. A straight path through the middle that would run all the way to the stream, the carefully grown bushes and flowerbeds down the sides and the fruit trees at the end. And then to the right, growing up it had been my favourite part, the quaint piece of wilderness, walled off by a rough stone wall that was covered in moss, the mountains rising up behind it. The whole garden seemed to be fairly overgrown but it seemed mightily unimportant. I couldn't wait to go out there.

My bag and cloak were deposited at the end of the bed and I dug out another jumper, pulling it over my head before swinging my cloak around my shoulders. I left the room, went downstairs and ran into a room that I knew to be the music room. Of course there wasn't a single instrument in there, not even the wallpaper was still on the wall, the expensive silk sold off a long time ago. Grandmother had always called it the music room when she was alive. I had never questioned the lack of instruments. There were, however, two glass doors leading towards the terrace outside.

It smelled so fresh out that I stood still for couple of seconds just to close my eyes and breathe in deeply, the wind blowing through my hair. At Hogwarts I was always too busy with studying or with my friends to just go outside and besides, despite the air being clean and crisp, it didn't have that wet green lining to it that the gardens gave it here. I felt nostalgic, thinking of my parents and grandparents sitting on garden chairs having tea on the stone terrace (while having tense but polite conversation) as Aidan and I went off on adventures, still unaware of adult worries and arguments.

I spent about an hour in the garden (walking to the stream and back) before going back in, shrugging off my cloak as I walked back upstairs to my room. I was about to sit down on the bed when Krinkly interrupted me. 'Mistress Cecilia is wanted in the drawing room for afternoon tea, please.' He said and I awkwardly nodded my head to the elf. 'Tell Grandfather I'll be right down.' I said. I swapped my shoes, they were muddy, and I had a feeling Grandfather wouldn't appreciate them, but as I moved to leave the room, there was a tapping on the window.

I saw it was a small brown Tawny Owl, a school owl I realised, carrying a letter for me. I walked back to the window, opening it up just enough for the owl to come in without letting the room cool down tremendously. It was cold enough without that. I took the letter from the owl, apologising for my lack of treats, I hadn't brought them with me from Hogwarts, and the owl left through the window looking quite disappointed. I looked at the address and saw indeed my name, but the handwriting was unfamiliar. I was curious who at Hogwarts would send me mail on the first day of the week long spring holiday but I stuffed it in the pocket of my robes, leaving it for later. Grandfather was not the kind of person who enjoyed waiting.

'Cecilia, sit down, tell me how you like your tea.' Grandfather said as I came in. He was standing by the side table, holding the tea pot and a tea strainer. 'Just a splash of milk if you could, no sugar.' I requested as I sat down, and he poured the water through the strainer into two cups before adding milk to both. He didn't take sugar either. He handed me the saucer and cup and took his own with him back to his favourite armchair.

'Tell me,' Grandfather began, stirring the milk through his tea 'Are your classes all going well?' He asked and I nodded timidly. 'Yes, Grandfather.' I replied. 'It's a lot of work though, N.E.W.T.'s are coming in next school year, you see.' I explained and he nodded. 'Do you have a favourite class?' He asked and I shrugged. 'Arithmancy.' I said, feeling a bit shy about talking of my best subject. I should have known of course that with Grandfather, I didn't need to say much.

'Ah yes, Arithmancy, the numeral magic.' Grandfather called out. He sipped his tea importantly. 'I was a rather accomplished Arithmancer back in my school days and I would've grown to be a capital practitioner if I hadn't gone into property management after Hogwarts.' He orated. I shifted in my seat, trying to get comfortable; I knew how well he liked to embellish his talents and there was no use diverting the conversation. He'd just find a new way to make it about himself.

'I was of course expected to go into property management by my father as I was heir to his estate. I was never awarded the luxury of further exploring Arithmancy, nor any of my other many talents, but I live with no regrets as Reekes Park is, as you can tell, a breath-taking piece of land.' He told me, stretching out his arm towards the large windows and I nodded. It was difficult to pay attention. Usually, when we'd visit over Christmas, I would zone out during his self-indulgent speeches, counting on dad to keep up the conversation.

'I noticed you took a walk in the garden.' Grandfather commented after a moment. I nodded. 'It's as beautiful as I remembered.' I told him. It was no lie; it was gorgeous in its sobriety. He smiled, although his smiles were never warm. 'Reekes Park has never failed to charm its visitors.' He replied, putting his cup and saucer down, folding his hands over his right knee as it was crossed over the left. 'I can see why.' I merely answered. 'In large part due to its proper management, of course.' He added. 'Of course.' I answered.

'Cecilia, tell me, what are your plans for after school.' He questioned. I resisted the urge to shrug. 'I want to work for the Ministry. I was thinking something legislative perhaps, although honestly; I'm not quite certain yet.' I said apprehensively and Grandfather nodded, feigning understanding. 'It's good to keep your options open.' He said but something in his tone of voice suggested to me that perhaps he had very specific ideas about it. I hurriedly took a sip of tea myself.

Grandfather wasn't going to leave me wondering about his intentions, only shifting slightly in his seat before divulging his train of thought to me. 'As you should know, the estate is entailed to your brother, I'm speaking of Reekes Park of course, but I foresee that you're much more suited to look after it.' He said in that large, booming voice he always spoke with and I didn't know what to make of it. 'I beg your pardon?' I said politely. 'Oh,-' he elaborated unhelpfully, misunderstanding my befuddlement'-it's how it used to be, these old-fashioned rules and laws. It all goes through the male line.' He said.

'Have you ever thought about what it takes to manage an estate?' He asked me and I shook my head. 'It is all rather complicated. I would not bore you with the details now, but it is a full-time occupation. One would have to devote their life to the task. I would like to show you during your stay here.' He said and I nodded, not quite understanding what he was getting at.

'I am an old man, Cecilia.' He spoke. I didn't say anything. 'Although, Merlin prevents it, I do not hope to expire anytime soon, it will without a doubt be sooner than I wish.' He went on. 'This family has produced no great promise for the continuation of this estate. Your mother, as you know, wants not to be involved, your aunt I would not want to be involved and your brother has no mind for anything of this subject. So it must be you.'

I was certain that he was going to have to carry on that sentence because it could not possibly stop there. I had no idea what to say to that. 'What?' I thus replied cleverly. Grandfather was not to be deterred. 'You escaped my notice for a long time and that is my own fault; I was foolish to stick to the entailment. The entailment can be side stepped, if we so wish, in favour of you.'

I didn't know what to say and I saw the wrinkles in his forehead scrunch together as he made himself ready to speak up again. I could tell he was looking for a certain kind of reaction from me, but I couldn't possibly imagine what that reaction might be. I stayed silent and I saw his lips part but then there was a pop by the door and we both turned our heads to see that Krinkly had apparated into the room, looking upset and out of breath.

'Mistress Wendela is here!' Krinkly squeaked in a panic about two seconds before mum burst through the door, a face on her that was so livid that sparks seemed to spatter off her. 'You!' She growled at Grandfather who stood up with remarkable ease considering the kind of glare that was fixed on him. I stood up as well, a lot less relaxed, nearly spilling my tea. I put the cup and saucer back on the side table.

'I can't believe you!' Mum shouted and for a short moment I thought it was me who she was shouting at and I already shrunk back into my robes, but I realised it was actually Grandfather she was angry with. I looked at him and saw that he looked annoyed by the dramatics.

'That your daughter would want to spend time with me when you so clearly hate it?' He asked, squaring up, not intimidated by his oldest child. Which was a feat by itself; mum could be very intimidating. 'No, Cecilia is curious and kind; if her grandfather asked her to come visit, she'd come.' She bit back. 'I just can't believe that you invited her! We had a deal: Only during Christmas and their birthdays. Cecilia's last birthday is the first one you even showed up at in years! Don't try and tell me you miss spending time with her.' She added cynically. Before he could answer she let out a shriek of frustration. 'After all the times I have told you that I don't want you in my kids' lives!'

I quickly shuffled to the side, standing out of the way, by the wall. I had never seen mum yell at Grandfather like that before. I had heard her speak ill of him countless times to dad and during visits I had witnessed some small rows, but she would've spent days mentally preparing beforehand, just to keep her mouth shut during the majority of it, so it never got out of hand. Not like this.

Grandfather snorted at what mum had said. 'What are you so frightened of? That you're actually proven wrong? That I'm, in fact, not this horrible person you make me out to be?' He asked rhetorically but mum answered anyway. 'I'm frightened of you actually proving me right! That you'll ruin her life the way you attempted to ruin mine and Tamora's!' She shrieked out, seemingly gobsmacked that she even had to say it. I flattened myself out against the wall as to not be noticed as I looked at my mum and her father argue.

'Ruin your lives!?' Grandfather shouted back. 'I have done nothing but try to raise you two up for greatness!' He countered but mum scoffed. 'Greatness? Look around yourself. The whole house has been stripped bare to finance your greatness. Do you even know how embarrassing you are?' Mum yelled. Grandfather was about to answer but mum turned to me sharply, pointing from me to the door and spitting an equally sharp 'Let's go!'

I ran to the door as if I was hit by a whipping spell and was followed by mum, but Grandfather wasn't about to let her have the last word. 'Embarrassing? I am embarrassing?' He kept shouting as he stalked after us into the hallway. 'That common job of yours? Are you enjoying play-acting that plebeian life? With your poor, ill-bred husband, that tiny, filthy flat? Making friends with the likes of-' but he was interrupted by mum as she turned to him mid-corridor, pricking her finger into his chest.

'And the life you and Mother provided for us in this big stupid castle was the perfect home life? You didn't even care about us, just about your brainless quest for lost wealth and prestige. You were just using me and Tamora.' She accused. 'Tamora and I!' Grandfather corrected, bellowing after her as she spun around, legging it to the entrance hall.

By the front door, mum raised her wand. 'Accio Cecilia's bags!' She rushed to say but upstairs we could hear the bags knock into a closed door and mum eyed Krinkly, who had followed us into the front hall. 'Get her bags.' She ordered. 'Mistress Wendela, Master does not want Krinkly to-' he began to say but mum was not in the mood for it. 'Just get the pissing bags!' She snapped at him and with a squeak he disapparated.

Grandfather was not impressed with mum's temper. 'You and your sister may have decided for yourself that spending time with your father is abominable, but Cecilia is old enough to decide for herself whether she wishes to stay here or not.' He stated icily and I froze momentarily, scared of being dragged into the fight, but fortunately mum wasn't about to let that happen. 'She's not of age and therefor I decide where she'll be spending her holidays. And it'll never be here!'

Right at that moment Krinkly popped back with my bags and I took them from him, feeling rather red-faced and sheepish as I pulled my cloak over my shoulders, murmuring a dumb thank you to the house elf. 'Out, Cecilia!' Mum called out and I didn't need to be told twice, fleeing through the big oak doors, into the courtyard.

'You come back here, Wendela Reekes!' Grandfather roared from the doorway. I felt mum's hand on my back, pushing me forward hard enough that I couldn't look back, having to watch my feet to not stumble. 'You know bloody well it's Wiggleswade, Father!' She shrieked back and she shoved me across the threshold of the wicket gate that led underneath the castle wall. We scampered over the drawbridge and down the pathway that would lead us to the gate and off the estate.

Mum didn't say a word to me as she extended her wand arm, the Knight Bus arriving seconds later. She only briefly spoke to pay Stan Shunpike and to tell Ernie the driver the address, but the heat of her argument was still steaming off her voice and the normally chatty twosome didn't bother her much. Anticipating the long journey from Scotland to London, we went all the way to the top floor of the triple-decker and sat in the back.

I felt my stomach eating itself up, not sure of whether to say something to mum or not as she was staring straight ahead, her knuckles white as her hands were gripping into the velvet cloth of her dark blue robes. Eventually, when the Knight Bus had momentarily stopped around Derbyshire to let an elderly witch with a crooked cane off, I decided to speak up.

'Mum? I'm sorry.' I mumbled pathetically. I had of course agreed to come to Grandfather's house for the week, knowing the risk of mum maybe finding out, but having been caught right away on the first day made me feel dumb and disrespectful rather than rebellious.

Mum looked surprised though, her body relaxing a little as she looked at me. 'Oh, no darling, I'm not angry with you.' She said. I felt tears prick in my eyes all of a sudden and I hurriedly turned back to the window, rubbing them away. 'Cecil, Cillyhead, I love you.' She whispered to me as she leaned closer, putting an arm around me. 'My argument with your grandfather had nothing to do with you. I'm not angry with you.' She said again.

I didn't know whether to believe her or not, so I just kept looking out the window. She didn't say anything either, but she kept her arm where it was, softly massaging my shoulder in a comforting manner throughout our journey and I did feel my heart still and my tummy unknot itself.

When we stepped off the purple contraption just outside the Leaky Cauldron, mum grabbed my elbow and linked it with her own, and together we walked inside, greeting Tom and making our way into Diagon Alley. I could even feel a small smile slipping onto my face again as we walked the familiar cobblestones.

'You want to get some hot ice cream?' Mum asked as we passed Florean Fortescue's and I immediately agreed, the weather still cold and my limbs feeling stiff and because I felt encouraged by mum's jovial attitude towards me, despite everything.

We exchanged a few friendly words with Mr Fortescue before taking one of the small tables by the window, sharing a scoop of the coffee flavoured ice cream, steam billowing up, obscuring my view of mum. I took a spoonful, blowing on it before sticking it in my mouth, the bittersweet substance melting on my tongue. It was still a bit too hot and I breathed in big puffs of air to cool down my mouth.

'Cecilia?' Mum asked as I took a second bite. The soft smile had left her face and I quickly looked away. 'Can we agree that you'll never lie to me again?' She asked and I felt my cheeks flush. 'Technically I didn't lie.' I said, knowing it was a stupid thing to say. She didn't mind pointing it out. 'Arguing semantics has never done conversation any good.' She said dryly and I nodded, looking at the bowl of piping hot ice cream.

'Well, I don't think promising to never lie again is very realistic, but I won't about something like this.' I said after a moment and I heard mum chuckle. 'What more could I wish for?' She asked rhetorically, taking a bite herself now as well, hissing out right after. 'Bloody hot!' She swore.

'I really am sorry.' I added after a moment. 'I don't even know why I didn't tell you.' I said but mum sighed, eating another spoonful of ice-cream, steam coming out of her ears. 'Of course you do. Because I wouldn't approve. I'd have stopped you from going.' She told me. I didn't say anything and neither did she after that so we just went on eating.

We went home right after we finished our ice cream, going in through my dad's shop. Julia, the shop assistant, was manning the floor but she called out dad from his office, when she saw me and mum come in, and dad rushed out, smiling widely when he set eyes on me and opening up his arms even wider. I ran into them, hugging him fiercely around the waist. 'Hey there, Cillyhead.' He murmured into my hair and I didn't say anything back, just holding him tighter.

Dad told me we would chat at dinner and he wanted to hear all about my time at school in the last few months. Mum followed me upstairs, not kicking off her shoes like I did, which told me she had somewhere to be soon. 'Did you have work today?' I asked, hoping she didn't have to blow off her job to come pick me up from Reekes Castle. She shook her head. 'No, I took a couple of days off to help Ruby move some things around the house.' She said, referring to my grandmother on my dad's side.

I watched her tinker around the dinner table, organizing some piles of parchments, some of them being her work notes for Prophet articles, others just being bills that still needed to be paid. She tapped a plate with crumbs on it with her wand and it swished away into the kitchen. It was clear that mum and dad used it as a workspace, only using the end to eat. It was just the two of them when I was in Hogwarts. Mum had her own office in Aidan's old room, but I knew she liked sitting at the dinner table late at night while dad sat on the couch and read. Silent companionship.

'Mum?' I asked and she hummed in acknowledgement as she continued tidying up the table. 'Why are you so against me getting to know Grandfather?' I questioned. Mum looked up and frowned at me, as if she couldn't fathom me even asking that question. I was quick to add; 'I mean, I do get it; I know that you and Aunt Tamora had a difficult relationship with him and Grandmother growing up, but you've never let me or Aidan figure it out on our own.' I considered my words. 'I mean, you said it yourself, if I had told you, you would've stopped me from visiting him.'

Mum's face softened and she sighed. She put down the parchment she was still holding and took out her wizarding watch, looking at it with some thought. She sighed but then sat down on the sofa, patting the space beside her. 'Come sit with me.' She said. I obediently did as she asked and she pulled me against her, her arm around my shoulders similar to how it had been in the Knight Bus and her hand stroking my hair away from my face as she leaned her cheek on top of my head.

'As you know, your grandparents and I always had a complicated understanding and when your grandmother passed away in '89, I suddenly had a sort of freedom to review my association with them that I didn't feel I had before.' She said, talking slowly as if she was being careful not to say something she didn't mean. 'Mother was the most forceful between the two so when she was still alive, I never felt it was possible to just cut them out.' She told me and I nodded, trying to understand the best I could.

'Cecilia, your dad and I have always done our best to give you and Aidan autonomy over your lives. We wanted you to make your own choices, discover your own interests. Your childhoods, you must understand, were very different from mine.' She continued. 'My first taste of freedom was when I started at Hogwarts and even then it took years for me to...' She cut herself off and she was quiet for a moment. I couldn't see her face in our position, but I could feel her tense shoulder.

'Tell me, Cecilia, what does Slytherin pride itself on?' She asked me eventually and I thought a moment as to ensure my answer was precise and complete. 'Ambition. Cunningness. Resourcefulness.' I replied after a beat. Mum hummed. 'And that can mean many different things in many different contexts but for my parents that meant restoring the family name and the family vault to its former glory.' She told me. 'To use whatever means they possess to do that. And I'd like to point out that Father sees you as one of those means.' Mum said and I listened carefully, storing away the information diligently.

'But I'm just as much a Slytherin as them but I didn't want what they wanted. The family reputation, the bloody wealth that was lost generations ago. I wanted the liberty to think for myself. For me to emancipate myself from my family and my family history.' She let out a big sigh. 'But when you seek only power you have no respect for those who have none and my ambition of having freedom and happiness was not acceptable to them. At all.'

Mum sat up a bit, kicking her shoes off and putting her feet up on the coffee table, and I glanced at her momentarily to see a sombre mood having overtaken her face. 'And ultimately that's why I'm so against you and your brother getting close to your grandfather because I know the prize of his agreeableness. Him being pleasant ends when your usefulness ends, and I just don't want you to have to go through that hurt.'

I snaked my hand into mum's hand, squeezing it supportively. 'I wouldn't call him pleasant.' I murmured and she chuckled. Mum complained a lot about her family and her upbringing but rarely went into any detail or depth. Her speaking so candidly was humbling and I didn't know what to say. Mum often came across as resentful and borderline unfair when she spoke about her parents, both her father and her late mother, but her short analysis just a minute ago was calm, collected and far more objective than I usually heard her talk. Although I noticed that even now she didn't go into much detail.

'I maybe put too much of that distrust on your aunt too.' Mum said after a moment of silence. 'Part of me believes that we went through that misery together and she might be the only one who understands, but on the other hand, she never rejected that life so outright like I did.' Mum murmured tiredly and I hummed. 'Maybe you also just associate her with the bad memories of your childhood.' I speculated. I felt mum smile. 'Yeah, maybe.' She agreed. 'It's all terribly complicated.' She said with another sigh. 'Have you thought about seeing a Head Healer sometimes?' I asked, not at all joking, but mum laughed. 'It's not quite that bad.' She said and I let it go, not wishing to start an argument.

'Turns out Grandfather wanted to talk to me about entailment.' I said after a second, sitting upright and looking at her face for her reaction. 'I didn't know what to say but I suppose he wants me to run the estate when he's gone.' I said and mum snorted. 'I can see why he wouldn't want me to do it. He must know I'd just blow the place up.' She said with a grin. I smiled too. 'I don't want to run an estate either.' I said after and she shook her head. 'You won't. Besides, he's getting ahead of himself. Gringotts will probably foreclose on the whole bloody castle. It's a miracle that Reekes Park stayed out of their hands for over a century of near bankruptcy.'

For a good five minutes neither of us said anything, just processing all that was said as we leaned into the couch cushions comfortably, but then my mind wandered to my cousin. 'What do you think of Stacy? She's having a bit of trouble adjusting, I think, in Slytherin.' I posed to mum and she chuckled lightly. 'I think Stacy hasn't quite yet discovered the joy of not minding others so much.' She said. 'Slytherin is very connection oriented, and I can imagine many of her housemates might object to her being adopted and she's just trying to get ahead of that. But she'll settle.'

After that Mum had to run to an appointment to get her robes adjusted at Madam Malkin's so late that afternoon I was home alone. I considered going downstairs to the shop to see dad but he said he would see me at dinner and I didn't want to bother him so I went up to my room instead (even though he'd never object to me visiting him, work or no work).

I went into my bedroom to see that everything was as I left it and I went to sit on the windowsill, looking out the window at the hustle and bustle of Diagon Alley. When I adjusted, I felt something in my pocket and I curiously pulled out a letter. I suddenly remembered the letter that had arrived for me at Grandfather's. I hadn't read it yet and I had completely forgotten about it!

Dear Cecilia,

I am so sorry! I saw you were leaving Hogwarts for the holiday so I sent you a letter at your parents address and your mum sent a letter back that I was mistaken and that you were still in school. I should've understood by then but I, like a total dunce, stubbornly wrote back saying that you had definitely gone home, that I had even asked your friend; Mathilda Goodfellow?

I cannot express my apologies well enough, I feel like a complete idiot. I hope you didn't get into too much trouble?

Lots of regrets,

Stacy

PS: I sent you a letter originally to ask if you wanted to have lunch with me the weekend you come back to school.

I smiled at the letter. I hadn't even asked myself how mum found out I was at Grandfather's; I just assumed she had sensed it somehow; mum was very resourceful. I'd write to Stacy in the morning to tell her that she needn't worry and that I'd love to have lunch with her when I got back. I thought back to mum's words. Stacy still had to learn the value of standing on your own. She pulled stupid stunts that landed her in detention just to get recognition from her peers, but she was also not being true to herself. She shrugged it off because she must, not because she is truly okay with bullying and teasing her fellow students. But I shouldn't be too hard on her. She had been alone for most of her life. She must be desperate for peers.

The rest of the week mum forced me to work in the shop with dad. As punishment for going behind her back she said. I would work open till close (I wasn't worth much as a workforce; dad and his shop assistant Julia were much more adept at it) and afterward I'd do my homework

Despite my full schedule, time spent with my parents was wonderful. We'd have dinner together, Aidan joining us most evenings and we laughed and joked and talked. We'd usually play Exploding Snaps in between the empty plates after we finished our meals. I'd lose, dad would win and mum and Aidan would complain about how much either of them had deserved to win.

I teased Aidan about Grandfather wanting Reekes Castle to be entailed onto me instead of him and dad joined my pestering with much enthusiasm as Aidan good-naturedly admitted to my superiority, eventually trumping me by telling me that he'd write Grandfather to say that he much agreed with his decision and that I'd be the perfect heir to the estate. That shut me up, knowing Aidan was a wild card and he might actually do it.

One night my grandparents came for dinner as well, from dad's side of course, and Nan made a real effort to scold me for going behind my parents' back, making me flush red, but Granddad just clapped me on the back heartily and asked for a glass of firewhisky as he sat down.

That night Aidan sat with me after we cleared the table. We were up in my room and I attempted to get through some Arithmancy homework but Aidan had no respect for my schoolwork and continued to talk to me even after I told him I needed to focus. 'Nina was saying she wanted to visit you on your next Hogsmeade trip. She wants to get to know you better.' He said and I was surprised by the news. None of Aidan's previous girlfriends ever expressed a wish to be closer to me.

'Why?' I asked, my surprise probably evident on my face. Aidan chuckled, rolling onto his side as he was laying on my bed. 'Because she knows how important you are to me.' He said and I couldn't supress a small smile. I looked back down on my Arithmancy calculations.

'You want me to figure out how you will do in the future?' I asked Aidan as I gestured to my textbook. 'I don't want to know!' Aidan said but I had already picked up my quill. 'I'm figuring it out.' I muttered as my eyes scanned the numbers, going through the chart. 'Nina Bugg right? With two g's?' I confirmed. He groaned but then nodded.

'Alright, well, your heart numbers are both 4's.' I started, tracing the chart with my finger. 'Why, that must be good, right?' Aidan piped up and I smiled. 'Yeah, the 4 is stable and dependable.' I said. 'Although, it's also predictable and it stagnates.' I added. Aidan snorted, but he didn't interrupt as I continued.

'But you, Aidan, you have a 5 for your social number and that leads to great instability.' I said. 'You can be irresponsible, impatient and you can't commit. When this relationship ends, it most definitely will be your doing.' I told him and he groaned. 'Don't say "when" it ends!' He replied and right after 'You can stop it now, I think. I reckon I've heard enough.' and I looked up from my parchment with a grin. 'Is it getting too serious?' I asked cheekily and he rolled his eyes. 'I just don't care for the Arithmancy readings of a mere Hogwarts student.' He said snidely, a twinkle in his eyes.

I pretended to be hurt as I closed my book and screwed the lid of my inkpot shut. 'I'm top of my class, you know!' I argued. 'I had an O for the subject on my O.W.L.'s.' But Aidan shrugged his shoulders. 'Just leave it.' He said and for the first time I realised that he was just slightly more serious than I had first realised. I turned on my desk chair fully. 'Are you alright?'

I saw a glimpse of a rather restrained face before he brightened up and shot me a smile. 'I was just thinking about my colleague. He has a girlfriend that he really likes but he feels she doesn't really like him. And I think he's right.' He said. I was thrown off by the change of subject, but I adjusted and offered to read them. 'I was hoping you'd say that, I'm quite curious. My colleague's name is Aldrich Atkins. He's a real tosser, actually, but we have a drink after work sometimes.' He said.

I did a quick calculation in my head. 'Alright, and his girlfriend?' 'Her name is Gemma Farley.' He replied immediately and I was already halfway through her name when I realised, I knew that name. 'Gemma Farley? Wasn't she in your year?' I asked, although I knew the answer.

Gemma Farley had been in Slytherin and had been in the same year as my brother. Aidan, the proud Gryffindor, had been at odds with her the whole time they were at Hogwarts, it getting especially nasty when he had been named prefect for Gryffindor in his fifth year and she was simultaneously made prefect for Slytherin.

'Yeah, I already knew Atkins was a huge twat, always kissing arse with the boss, but turns out he's going out with her as well. She does some work for the Daily Prophet or something and recently she is sent to our offices quite a bit for advertisement samples.' He rambled as he sat up a bit more on my bed, leaning his back against the headboard. He was suddenly sounding very much like he did when he was sixteen. I had only been eleven or twelve myself but that never stopped him from complaining to me about what a rotten house Slytherin was and how everyone in it was even more rotten. He never dared say it when mum was around.

'Didn't we meet her in Diagon Alley over Christmas break too?' I asked him and he looked thoughtful for a second. 'Oh, yeah, you were there, weren't you? Yeah, we ran into her.' He said. I was about to ask why he was so interested in her relationship with his annoying colleague but before I could we were called down by mum for dessert. Dad had gone out to get pie from Plum Fairy's Pastry Shop. 'We're coming!' Aidan shouted back, swinging his legs off my bed. I noticed he was wearing socks with snitches on them which I found funny as he was the worst flyer I knew.

'You coming?' He asked as he got up and I rolled up my parchment. 'I hope dad brought walnut; I'm really feeling like walnut.' I said, putting the roll in my drawer. I forgot about Gemma Farley as we gathered around the dinner table and picked at the (unfortunately not walnut but still good) peach pie with our dessert forks and laughed as Nan recounted her run in with another customer who jumped the queue at Eeylops Owl Emporium when she went to get some owl treats earlier in the week.

Friday was my last day working in the shop, Saturday being the day that I'd take the Hogwarts Express back up to Scotland. Dad was in his office, paying bills, and Julia was dusting off the books in the window. There were no customers at the moment. We had a surge just after lunch but now it was just Julia and me.

I was sorting receipts behind the desk and it took some focus to make sure I did it right but the task was tedious enough that soon my attention drifted and I noticed the odd way in which Julia was dusting the books.

She had a rag in her hands and she carefully reached into the window display and picked up each one individually to drag the cloth gently across the cover, ridding it off dust. 'Why aren't you using magic?' I asked her, wondering why she was being so roundabout in her methods. Julia looked up and I saw her processing the question before she laughed. 'Old habits.' She said. 'Oh, right. You're muggleborn.' I replied.

She nodded, putting another book back, sighing heavily. 'But you're right, I'm wasting time.' She said and she pulled her wand out of her pocket, muttering a spell under her breath as she waved it around. 'Probably better like this.' She said brightly as she walked my way, the rag flying into the window display.

'You have that a lot?' I asked her. 'That you do things the muggle way?' but she shook her head. 'No, not that often. It's just things I don't do a lot, it's just a reflex. Everything else I'm used to doing by magic by now. I've been living in the magical world for nearly seventeen years after all.' I nodded my head understandingly. We were quiet a moment longer as I sorted out the last of the receipts and she went on to trying to magic the mop to wipe itself across the floor.

'Did you have a hard time transitioning to wizarding society?' I asked, putting away the last of the receipts. 'When you were young, I mean? I added. She looked up with a puzzled glance briefly before shrugging. 'Sometimes.' She answered. She didn't say anything else and I turned on my stool to look at her as she was struggling to get the mop to do its job; it was just swinging about a bit, barely wiping the floor. 'More of a flick on the wrist.' I supplied helpfully. 'I've always been rubbish at household charms.' Julia grumbled.

She did as I suggested and the mop straightened out, swishing forward. Julia whooped, pocketing her wand. 'Which one of those hundreds of O.W.L.'s of yours was for hexing mops?' She asked jokingly and I blushed a little but smiled. 'You want to work for the Ministry, right?' Asked Julia and I nodded. 'Yeah, a life of public service for me.' I said with humour. She chuckled. 'I'd say you're wasted on the Ministry. Government is just mind-numbing mediocrity.' She told me. I didn't answer her as I didn't know what to say to that.

'Is muggle government similar to ours?' I asked after a moment and she laughed. 'It's bigger. And definitely similar in many ways, although it's different too.' She replied all too vaguely. 'To be honest, I don't really know anymore. I was only a child when I left the muggle world and it wasn't like I was keeping up with politics then.' She said. 'Why the sudden interest in muggles?' She asked curiously right after. 'I have a muggleborn friend in Hogwarts and he and I talk about it sometimes.' I said.

Julia snapped her fingers. 'Oh, Mr Wiggleswade mentioned it. You bought him an owl for Christmas, didn't you?' Julia asked. 'Dad told you that?' I asked, feeling embarrassed. 'Not too many details, no worries.' Julia said. 'He's very discrete.'

I groaned, leaning my arms on the register and my face on my arms. 'I just thought it would make life easier for him.' I explained but Julia put a hand on my shoulder. 'No need to justify yourself. I think it was very considerate of you.' She said. I turned my head sideways to be able to see her. 'You think so? No one really gets it, I think.' I told her. She nodded.

'One of the hardest things for me growing up was that in the summer I was completely cut off from everyone.' Julia said. 'I spent a year learning all these fantastical things, meeting these great people, in Care of Magical Creatures I'd literally pet unicorns; the stuff of fairy tales for muggles.' Julia sat down on the stool next to mine, the one dad usually sat on.

'But then I'd go back home, back to the muggle world, and I could tell no one about it and I couldn't contact anyone from my life at Hogwarts either. It was almost like I had had this insane dream. Most of my family couldn't know about it nor any of my childhood friends. It was just me, my parents and my younger sister and despite their best effort there was no way that they could understand. And it was lonely.' She said.

I took a moment to digest what she said. 'Thank you for telling me that.' I sighed. 'Makes me feel less of an idiot for spending that much gold.' I said. 'How much did you spend?' She asked in return. 'A little over 20 Galleons.' I admitted and she let out a laugh. '20 Galleons!? That's a little more than considerate!' She joked and I blushed. 'Tell me about it.' I only murmured.

That evening we had a quiet night in; it was just mum and dad and Aidan. We had dinner, stayed up talking till late and when it was finally time to go to bed, I spent twenty minutes just hugging them all, accepting their loving kisses on the cheeks, forehead, the top of my head, with much pleasure. Aidan ran his big, warm hands through my hair as he embraced me in his arms, murmuring to me that I'd be alright. Mum told me she could hardly wait for the summer. Dad just smiled that smile at me that told me all he felt. I felt so loved, so at home.

And still, lying in bed later and looking at the ceiling, I was happy to return to Hogwarts the next day. I had attempted to read a few chapters of Pride and Prejudice, the muggle book Felix had given me, but I felt too content to make myself focus on anything too complicated, so I put it in my bag to read on the train the next day. Right now I just wanted to think about going back to school.

It had been difficult for a while, for many different reasons. The Quibbler's interview with Harry Potter had made me worry a lot, Fred Weasley had made me feel all kinds of ways, Felix had blown up a lot of dust as well, and now the whole thing with Marietta. And I had felt exhausted by it all by the time the holiday started, completely worn out. But no longer.

I felt like I could handle it all now; being with my family, although briefly, had recharged me. I could support Marietta and Cho, I could stop worrying about the dumb hole in my heart that Fred had left, I would stop worrying about things I couldn't control like stupid interviews with Harry Potter and I felt determined to get my close relationship with Felix back on track, I wasn't going to feel awkward about that anymore and wouldn't allow him to either. I felt ready for all of it.

Cheers to you for getting through this chapter! Maybe motivate me by leaving a review? :)