Ellana bent down and ran her fingers through the long shards of grass. They had been riding for a few days towards the Frostback Mountains and were stopped at the same lake in which they rested on their journey to Cumberland – where Ellana had discarded her boots. She shifted her gaze across the hilly landscape, wondering if they were still here…

"Your boots are in my pack." Cullen smiled while approaching her, "If you're looking for them – I picked them up after you left, incase… just incase you wanted them."

Ellana raised an eyebrow, "Oh… I didn't know that you had seen that."

He brushed his hand against her arm and lightly traced small circles with his thumb. She felt herself tense at his touch; for some reason, she found it inexplicably frustrating that he had taken her boots. He pulled away to return to the horses and Ellana felt relief wash over her. She wanted a few moments to herself.

'Time to get back to the others.' She pulled herself up the slope and began heading towards the rest of the group who had already gathered on the dusty trail. Cullen was engaged in a conversation with Avexis; she caught the tail end of it as she inched closer to their location.

"…yes, it's quite windy but the views are extraordinary. I am sure you will like it." Ellana guessed he was speaking to her of Skyhold.

"To be fed and sheltered is all that I require. I will lend my assistance however best can serve your forces." Avexis' cold voice caused Ellana to cringe. It was horrible, hearing her like this.

Cullen saw that she had returned and nodded towards Avexis before heading over to Ellana. She was throwing back a short drink of water before preparing to mount Cullen's horse.

"It's difficult to figure out what to say to her." Cullen nodded towards Avexis.

"Mmm…" Ellana mumbled.

He continued, "Maker, I'm trying not to say anything that speaks of emotions but I find the task to be somewhat impossible. I feel badly when she has to correct something I've said – "

"She doesn't have feelings for you to hurt. No need to feel bad." Ellana curtly placed the water jug back in the horse's pack. Clearly, anger and exhaustion were getting the best of her today.

Cullen remained quiet for a few moments. "I look forward to getting to know her more back at Skyhold. She is kind and eager to help."

Ellana spun around to face him, "You won't get to know her. Not while she's like this! Not after what the Templars did to her. Until we find a way to reverse tranquility, none of us will be able to get to know her!" She snapped.

Cullen lightly stepped backwards and furrowed his brow.

"Let's get moving." She coldly spoke and hoisted herself onto Cullen's horse, eager to continue their journey back to Skyhold.

Ellana was extremely tense for the next hour as she and Cullen rode along with the rest of their companions. She was incredibly frustrated, but couldn't place who or what she was angry at. Cullen's hand would occasionally grace over her leg, lightly brushing her as a way to check in on how she was doing; sometimes she ignored it by pretending to have fallen asleep. He was determined to engage her in small talk, frequently commenting on their current progress for the day, how the Nevarrian city had looked – it was never-ending. Why couldn't he just let her rest and remain silent.

Finally, Ellana snapped. "Why don't we talk about the fact that you seem to have regained Templar abilities. When did that happen?"

"You know when it happened." He glanced down at her long hair, blowing in the wind against his chest with confusion, "In the Circle when…" he trailed of.

"You didn't know of it beforehand?"

Cullen was startled, "Of course not. I would have told you – you know that."

She remained quiet.

Cullen wasn't sure what had gotten into her today. Her mood swings had become frequent since they departed Skyhold for Nevarra, but she felt exceptionally detached and cold today. Frankly, he had enough of the tiptoeing around her and preferred to face the issue in a more direct manner. "What's going on with you? You're upset – and you have a right to be. What the Templars did to your sister was wrong. The fact that you have to learn this new skill after everything we did to obtain the Litany is not fair. But you've seemed to assign the majority of blame and frustration to myself these past few weeks. Have I done something to offend you?"

She gave him a sharp glare over her shoulder and pulled at the horse's reins to cause an abrupt stop. Swinging her leg over to one side, she quickly jumped off the horse and began to walk towards the others; they had noticed Cullen's quick drop in pace and had also pulled their horses to a halt. "I'd like to ride with one of you." She called up towards Cassandra.

Cullen was dismayed and jumped off his horse to run after her. "Ellana – what is going on?" He reached out for her arm, yet she pulled it out of his grasp and turned towards him with a ferocious look in her eyes.

"What is going on?" she yelled, "Cullen – you have Templar abilities again! What, are you a Templar once more? Am I supposed to just feel completely fine about that?"

The group ahead glanced at each other in confusion and awkwardly continued a bit farther on the trail to give Ellana and Cullen some privacy. Cassandra gave Cullen a sympathetic stare before turning around and shuffling the others ahead. She knew the tension had been building between the two of them for weeks and this was bound to happen… she'd just hoped they would return to Skyhold before it erupted.

Cullen threw his hands up in exhaustion. "No, Ellana – I do not expect you to be completely fine with the fact that I have Templar abilities again. I just – I don't know, I haven't asked for them! They've just returned and I am equally confused as you are."

She glared at him, "And after everything that has been done to my sister! What – if we are arguing in the future will you just silence me?"

That hurt – immensely. "Ellana…" he whispered, "I would never do that to you, in that way. Would you ever even use your magic against me? Why are you asking me this?"

"No, I would not; but that doesn't matter! It's that you could. You could just stop me at any time. Wave your hand and I'm done, falling over and gasping for air. How is it fair that you have that much power over me?"

"Power I would never use!"

"It doesn't matter!" She screamed at him. Cullen had never seen Ellana this enraged before – much less having it directed towards himself. He didn't know what to say. She continued, "And what of our children? If they are mages – will you just silence them if they are unable to control their magic at first?"

"Our – our children?" Cullen stammered, "What are you – Ellana, no of course not! Why would you even bring something like that up? I would never…"

"Or maybe they'll want to follow in your footsteps and become one of you! They'll look like you, why not follow that path… my children, Templars. That's a comforting thought."

Cullen stood back and stared at Ellana in awe; she was on an endless ramble of nonsense now – he had no idea what she was talking about. Why would she be worrying about their children becoming Templars? This didn't make any sense. He noticed that she began to quiet and so he attempted to get through to her. "Ellana… why is this on your mind? Have I ever given you the impression that is what I'd want for… if we have children?"

"It doesn't matter, Cullen!" She glared at him again, "Do you know how half-elves are treated in Thedas? Horrible! The shemlens – you treat them horrible. Most pass as humans to avoid a lifetime of mistreatment and because they can – pass as a shem. They'll look like you! Only you. I'll be – I'll be lost. My children won't look anything like me, they won't know of what it means to be Dalish; to be an Elf. I'll just be throwing away everything that has molded me into who I am – won't be passing any of that along to them." She began to cry, "It's not fair. You shem come in and just erase our history. I can't even have children who will look like me; and now you have your Templar abilities to silence me at a whim. You hold all the power and I hold none..." her voice broke off before she angrily snapped, "You can't even let me decide to throw away my boots."

Cullen mouth had dropped open in complete shock. He had no idea that Ellana had been worrying about these things. He felt angry that she stood before him, in earshot of the rest of their group, shouting them at him now in a fit of rage – and yet he felt guilt and disappointment in himself for failing to consider them. He knew that half-elf children looked like humans… he knew of the mistreatment they would often face if their true identity was revealed… and yet, he had never considered how that may impact Ellana's thoughts on having children with him.

He took a step closer to her, "Why didn't you talk to me about this?"

"We're talking now." She curtly threw at him.

"No, we're not. I mean talk – you could have come to me about this. I understand, more than you may think. Why have I become the enemy in this, rather than us facing it together?"

Ellana gave him a sorrowful look and lowered her eyes, "I don't think you can understand, not fully."

A few moments passed in silence. Cullen stepped forward and whispered, "Where do we go from here?"

"I don't know." She turned away from him, "I'd like to ride with Cassandra for the rest of the journey."

"Of course." He nodded and slowly walked back to his horse. He grabbed her boots out of the attached bag and threw them on the ground.

…..

The next day, Cullen was roaming the forest lands with Alistair searching for dry wood to bring back to camp in order to start a fire. He hadn't spoken much with Ellana since their argument the previous afternoon. They had collected quite a few useable logs and were returning to camp when Cullen noticed Ellana and Silvhen in an open field, beginning the practice of her necromancy training. Cullen's shoulders tensed as he watched the two elves. His mind was brought back to their early days in Haven and Skyhold when he would train Ellana in physical combat, trying to protect her against the Red Templars. Even back then, she had seen him as something other than them – the Templars. With all of their history, how could she now see him in that light? He sighed and felt a pang of jealously rip through his chest as Silvhen instructed Ellana on how to wield her magic.

"Not only useless in helping her with this… also a hinderance." He sadly mumbled, "only making things harder for her."

Alistair placed a hand on his friend's shoulder and pulled him towards camp. "You guys just need some time… you're not a hinderance to her."

"I am." Cullen tore his eyes away from the two Dalish elves and slowly started making his way back to camp.

Even though Cullen is adorably sweet, I was thinking about how it would all feel for Ellana: having his Templar abilities return (that would make me feel a little weird, I think!), losing her ability to live with her Clan, having children that will not resemble her. It's an awful lot! I think for the right person, it's something that makes sense and she would do - but it would certainly cause a lot of inner turmoil, in my opinion & for my Inquisitor.