* ~ The Eighth Year Universe Series ~ *
PART FOUR
Brave New World
Chapter 40: High Hopes
A/N: The chapter title is from the song:
High Hopes by Panic at the Disco.
It was Hermione's first day in the Auror office, and so far, she loved it. She already knew a few of the Aurors by name because they were generally quite friendly, but now that she was in their bullpen, they regularly stopped to chat when work was slow.
"No, Rob, I don't think I can okay that."
"But you have the authority to do so."
"Yes, I have the authority to do it, but I don't see why you need an Auror box," Hermione told the Auror in question, "Nobody uses them anymore."
"I'll modify it," He said.
"To do what?"
"Be a time machine, obviously."
"Okay," Hermione said with a smirk, "I'm a muggle-born, so no, I will not release an Auror box to you so that you can become the next Doctor Who-"
She cut herself off when she saw Sadie step nervously into the department. Her eyes were bloodshot, and she looked ill, "Oh no…."
"What?"
"That's my friend. I need to go," Hermione said. She got to her feet.
"If I tell Spalding that you've gone home ill, can I have the Auror box?" He yelled after her.
"Yeah, sure!" Hermione replied. She grabbed her handbag and walked to the door to meet her friend, "Sadie! I thought you were in Egypt."
"I'm meant to be," Sadie said tearfully, "But I need you, Hermione."
Hermione nodded, "I'm here," she promised, "Come on, let's go home and get the kettle on. Then we can talk."
Sadie swallowed and nodded. She let Hermione hook her arm through hers, and they left the Ministry silently. Once they were outside, they apparated to Grimmauld Place, and Sadie unlocked number 11 by placing her hand on the door.
The two friends made their way into the kitchen, and Sadie sank into a seat at the table. She rested her head in her hands and took a deep breath.
Hermione put the kettle on the stove to boil and sat down opposite her friend. She reached across the table and took her hands, "What's going on?"
Sadie looked up tearfully, "I think…I might be pregnant."
"Yeah," Hermione said softly, "I think you might be too."
Sadie's eyes widened, "You do?"
"You were really sick for a long time," Hermione said gently, "I wasn't convinced that it was related to Egypt, but I figured you would have known if you were pregnant. I mean, when did you last have a period?"
Sadie grimaced, "I'm going to sound so stupid, but not since the honeymoon. I just figured it was all of the travelling and-"
"It doesn't sound stupid," Hermione assured her, "I was on the run for a year, remember? Travelling does mess them up. You're not stupid, okay? But you could have done a charm to check."
"I know," Sadie said. She bit her lip and looked at Hermione, "But I'm scared."
"Yeah," Hermione managed a weak smile, "I bet you are. Do you want me to cast it for you?"
Sadie nodded, "I feel sick."
"It's the nerves, Sade," Hermione said as she got to her feet, "If you don't want to see the spell change colour, close your eyes."
Sadie shut her eyes tightly, and Hermione cast the spell that revealed pregnancy. A grey smoke swirled around Sadie's stomach; if she wasn't pregnant, it would stay grey. If she was pregnant, it would turn pink.
Hermione bit her lip as the smoke began to change colour until it settled at a vibrant pink. She mumbled another spell which caused silver numbers to appear in mid-air. Hermione did some calculations then cancelled out the spell.
She put her wand down on the table and said, "Open your eyes, Sadie."
Sadie did, and the moment she caught Hermione's eye, she knew the answer.
"I am, aren't I?"
"Yes," Hermione replied quietly, "Eight weeks, Sade. It's a miracle you hadn't noticed."
"Eight weeks," Sadie said as tears rolled down her cheeks, "But that means…."
"Your honeymoon," Hermione said with a sheepish smile, "Yeah, that's when the baby was conceived."
"Oh Merlin," Sadie whispered, "But I've been travelling and drinking and – oh my god – I just-"
"You didn't know," Hermione said. She moved to the other side of the table so she could pull her into a hug, "And the diagnostic charm I just did was basic, but there were no alarm bells, so I doubt you did it any harm."
Sadie sobbed, "But Hermione, I'm only 19! And this means my life is over!"
"No," Hermione said firmly, "No, it doesn't. Come on, Sadie; we should have this chat somewhere you can be comfy."
She clicked her fingers, and a false door at the back of the pantry opened. Hermione half-dragged Sadie through the secret passage into the drawing-room, then she forced her onto a comfortable sofa in front of the fire.
Sadie grabbed Hermione's hand and pulled her onto the sofa next to her.
Hermione sighed as Sadie rested her head on Hermione's shoulder, "What am I going to do, Hermione?"
Hermione sighed. She kicked off her heels, undid her tight bun with a flick of her wrist and got comfortable on the sofa, "What you are going to do, is stay calm."
"How can I do that?" Sadie asked breathily, "What about my course? And what about Theo? He doesn't even have job stability, and what is he going to say? Oh my-"
"Shh," Hermione hushed her, "Panicking is bad for the baby. You need to just take a breath and calm down. You will have to drop out of your course, but that's not the worst thing in the world. In fact, maybe it's a sign, you hate it, Sade-"
"I know," Sadie sniffed.
"And what you really want is to own your own apothecary," Hermione continued, "So you could get a job in an Apothecary while you're pregnant. I know Ichabod, who runs the one in Diagon Alley, he'll let you work whatever hours you want, and you would learn a lot."
Sadie shuffled so that she could lie with her head in Hermione's lap.
"As for Theo, you don't have anything to worry about there, and I think deep down, you know that. This is just the panic speaking right now, but Theo has plenty of money regardless of job security, and you know he will be shocked at first but delighted. He has always talked about how much he wants a family."
"Yeah," Sadie said quietly.
"We'll make it work, Sadie," Hermione promised her, "The boys are on that secret mission, but it's meant to last a week at most. I expect they will be home tonight, and when they get home, we are going to sit down and tell Theo everything, and he is going to panic, okay? You know that, but that doesn't mean he doesn't want this. He'll just have a little cry, Draco will set him straight and tell him that he will be a wonderful Dad, and then he'll apologise to you for freaking out."
Sadie smiled, "You really are perceptive."
"It's a curse sometimes," Hermione joked.
"Thank you," Sadie said softly. She shut her eyes and took a deep breath.
"Anytime," Hermione said, "Now, when do you need to go back to Egypt?"
"I have a week's sick leave," Sadie replied.
"So we have a week to get everything sorted for you then," Hermione said, "Starting with a hot bath, I think."
"That would be nice, but I'm comfy," Sadie yawned, "And I don't sleep well in Egypt without someone to cuddle."
Hermione smiled in amusement, "So you're going to use me as a pillow for your afternoon nap then, yeah?"
"You're just so comfy, Mione," Sadie mumbled as she nestled into the dark-haired girl.
Hermione chuckled, "Once everyone knows, and Theo has had his little freakout, we're going to get you to St Mungo's for a check-up tomorrow. Okay? I know it's not essential, but it wouldn't hurt with all of the travelling that you've done."
"Uh-huh," Sadie yawned. She reached up and grabbed Hermione's hand, then slipped into an uneasy sleep.
"Is that light?"
"The trees are definitely thinning out up ahead," Neville said, "Dave, is that the end of the rainforest?"
Dave hissed, and Harry nodded, "He said yes, we're nearly out."
"Thank Merlin for that," Theo said, "We've been in here for days. I need to get home and floo Sadie to apologise."
"I'm sure she feels as guilty as you do about your last conversation," Draco assured Theo.
"I hope so," Theo said, "But she's been miserable lately. I've been wracking my brain in here to come up with alternative job options for her."
"Did you come up with any?" Harry asked.
Theo shrugged, "Nothing I know she would definitely want to do. She loves reading and writing though, so I thought maybe an author or a researcher?"
"Hermione thought about being a researcher," Draco mused, "But she said she loves reading books, and researching all of the facts that go into them would ruin that for her."
"I didn't think of it like that," Theo admitted, "The thing is, Sadie is smart enough to do pretty much anything she wants, but she's pretty picky about what she does want to do."
"You know how to pick them, Theo," Neville joked.
Theo smiled slightly, "She's a pain in the arse, but she's my pain in the arse."
Harry snorted, "Is that as romantic as you get?"
"Guys, look," Neville said eagerly.
They were in full sunlight now. They walked a little faster, and then with a collective sigh of relief, they realised that they had managed to escape the rainforest.
"We're out!" Theo cheered.
"What now?" Draco asked. He looked around, "Do we just wait for them to pick us up?"
In answer to his question, a portal appeared in front of him. On the other side, Sheppard stood to wave them through.
"I guess that answers your question," Harry joked as he stepped through the portal. The others all followed his lead, and once they were all through, the portal vanished.
"Welcome home, boys," Sumner said. They were standing in the office that he shared with Sheppard.
"Please tell us we weren't the last ones out," Draco said.
"You were. The other group came back a few hours ago," Sheppard said.
"But you would have finished first if someone hadn't been bitten by a rattlesnake," Sumner said. He looked pointedly at Harry.
"Sorry, Sir," Harry said sheepishly.
"As it is, you still pass this test," Sumner continued, "Aurors McKay and Brown were both pleased with how you did in there. You were particularly well commended by Auror Brown for coming up with that antivenom as quickly as you did."
"And Auror Carter highly commended you on your spell modification Recruit Nott," Sheppard added.
Theo smiled proudly.
"So overall, boys, it was a good job. The rest of you can head home, but I need to question Potter about why he brought a Boa Constrictor into my office."
Dave looked up lazily from where he was sleeping on Harry's shoulders. The other boys tried their best not to snigger as they left the office.
Harry glanced up at the clock, partly to avoid meeting Sumner's eye and partly because they had genuinely lost track of time in the rainforest. It was just before 5 pm, and he couldn't wait to get home to Daphne.
When the door shut behind the other three boys, Sumner turned his attention on Harry, "An explanation, please Potter?"
Harry cleared his throat, "Well, this Boa Constrictor is actually called Dave. His entire family were killed by poachers who wanted their skin to use as a fashion accessory. So Dave was lonely, and I was talking to him about how I was lonely too-"
"You speak parseltongue," Sheppard said.
"Uh, yes sir," Harry said, "It's a long story, but when Voldemort tried to kill me, he transferred a bit of his soul into me, and it lived in me for 17 years. When I walked to my death to sacrifice myself for the people I loved, Voldemort tried to kill me, but he actually killed the piece of himself in me. It's soul magic and love magic, so the whole thing is pretty complicated."
"How does that translate into you being able to talk to snakes?" Sumner asked bluntly.
"Well," Harry said, "I sort of developed some of the abilities that Voldemort had. One of which was being a Parselmouth. After the bit of his soul in me died, it didn't come as easily to me, but I guess it's like riding a bike. Once you know how to do it, you never forget."
"Right," Sumner said slowly, "So the snake-"
"Dave," Harry corrected.
"Dave," Summer said with a frown, "Told you he was lonely?"
"Yes, sir, so I asked him if he could lead us out of the rainforest if I promised to take him home with me," Harry said, "And he did get us out of the rainforest."
Dave hissed.
"He says he also saved my life because he found the mongoose that they got the antibodies from," Harry added.
Sheppard raised an eyebrow in Sumner's direction.
Sumner looked Harry dead in the eye and said, "Son, are you taking the piss?"
"No sir, Dave is genuinely a lonely snake who I feel a lot of empathy for," Harry said, "And I really can talk to snakes which I hope won't make you view me in a negative light. I know that people view it as a bad thing because of Salazar Slytherin."
Sumner shook his head, "I wasn't worried about that, Potter. I was more concerned with the giant snake you brought home with you. Are Boa Constrictors even legal as pets in this country?"
"Uh…shouldn't I be asking you that, sir?" Harry asked.
He was sure he heard Sheppard snigger before he replied, "Yes, it is legal to keep them as pets, but there are rules. You need a permit so that we can find you if your snake kills someone, and you need to put certain security measures in place to ensure the snake can't escape from your property."
"Thank you, Sheppard," Sumner said with a nod, "I am afraid that reptile care is not my speciality."
"My brother keeps snakes and lizards," Sheppard informed Harry, "I can put you in touch with Garry at Reptile Control. It's in the backroom of Eeylops. He will need to come out and do some inspections, then help you put all of the security in place."
Harry smiled at Sheppard, "Thanks, Sir, that would be really helpful."
"Right then, Potter," Sumner said finally, "Get yourself home. We will see you tomorrow morning."
Harry nodded and thanked the two men, then left the office. He got quick a few funny looks as he traversed through the training centre with a huge snake sleeping on his shoulders.
"Harry, is that you?"
"What other men have been casually walking into my house this week?" Harry joked as he followed Daphne's voice into the kitchen.
"Very funny. I haven't cooked for two because I didn't know when you would be-" Daphne turned around from the pasta pot and dropped the ladle in her hand, "Why the fuck do you have a huge ass snake around your neck?"
Dave lifted his head slightly and hissed feebly.
"His name is Dave, and he's not too happy about the fact you woke him up," Harry said, "Hang on, let me just explain to him who you are."
Daphne stared at her fiancé in disbelief as Harry looked the snake in the eye and began to hiss at it. The snake hissed back, and a full-blown conversation was had, of which Daphne understood nothing.
"He apologises. He didn't realise that you were his master's fiancé," Harry said once he and Dave had finished talking.
"His master?" Daphne asked, "Harry, that better not mean what I think it means."
"He was lonely!" Harry exclaimed, "I couldn't just leave him out there in the rainforest all alone. His entire family were killed by poachers who wanted their skin, just like my entire family are gone. He helped us out of the rainforest, you know?"
"I don't care if he helped you out of the bloody rainforest," Daphne said hotly, "We can't have a giant snake living in our house. We have a toddler!"
"We don't have to worry about that. He won't hurt Teddy," Harry promised. He looked at the snake and asked it in parseltongue, "You won't hurt Teddy, will you, Dave? He's my son, or at least he will be soon when we adopt him."
Dave shook his head slowly and hissed, "No, master. I will not hurt anyone that you love. I will only hurt those who seek to hurt you."
"I wish I had met you years ago when I knew lots of people like that, Dave," Harry hissed solemnly. He looked up at Daphne once more, "See?"
"No, I don't see because I don't speak fucking parseltongue!" Daphne said a little hysterically.
"He said he won't hurt anyone that I love, only those who seek to hurt me," Harry translated, "So you and Teddy don't need to worry."
"Great, so he's going to crush anyone who hurts you to death?" Daphne said with a shake of her head, "Unbelievable!"
"Daphne, I didn't think you would be so against the idea," Harry admitted, "Do you have something against snakes?"
"I don't think having a huge snake in the house is a great idea when we have a toddler," Daphne said hotly, "And I have had a very stressful day, so you picked a terrible time to come home with a giant fucking snake!"
"His name is Dave!" Harry exclaimed, "Why do people keep calling him a giant fucking snake? He has a name, you know? He has feelings."
"Oh, for the love of Merlin!" Daphne said. She put the pasta pot down on the table a little violently, "I am so fucking sorry that I didn't know Dave had fucking feelings, Harry!"
"Daph, calm down," Harry said gently. He set Dave down on the floor and walked over to her, "He won't be in the house. I'll get Nev's help, and I'll create a little cabin for him in the garden. I'll get Hermione to use one of those climate charms to recreate the rainforest. I'll go out and visit him, but you and Teddy don't have to worry."
Daphne shook her head in disbelief, "I give up."
"Daphne-"
"I am not in the mood, Harry!" Daphne exclaimed as she stalked up the stairs.
Harry sighed and turned to Dave, "I swear, she's not normally like this. She'll warm to you when she gets to know you."
Dave hissed, "I will not eat the child. They do not fulfil my hunger."
"Yeah," Harry grimaced, "I'm just…I'm just not gonna pass that one on Dave."
When Draco and Theo reached Grimmauld Place on Thursday evening, they were both exhausted and looking forward to a night in their own beds. They both went into number 12. Theo was intending on having a brief chat with Hermione, then heading home to floo Sadie.
When the door clicked shut, Draco called, "I'm back, love!"
"Is Theo with you?" Hermione's voice floated down the stairs.
"Yeah," Draco called back, "Why? Do you need him?"
"Yes! Come up to the drawing-room."
Theo frowned at his best friend, "Do you think everything is okay?"
"I hope so," Draco muttered. They jogged up the stairs together, and both of them got a shock when they saw two people in the drawing-room.
"Sadie!" Theo exclaimed, "You're meant to be in Egypt."
"I know," Sadie said. She had stopped crying, but her eyes were still bloodshot and puffy.
"She's got a week-long sick line," Hermione said, her eyes met Draco's.
Draco's eyes widened with realisation.
"Why?" Theo asked as he knelt in front of her, "What's wrong?"
Sadie bit her lip, and Hermione whispered, "Just tell him, Sadie, there's no easy way to do this."
Sadie looked at her husband and said, "I'm pregnant, Theo."
Theo didn't know what to say to that. He stared at her, completely frozen in shock. He opened his mouth, "You…you…."
Sadie shut her eyes tightly, expecting the inevitable freak out.
Draco crossed the room swiftly and pulled Theo to his feet. He pulled his best friend into a hug roughly and said, "Don't freak out."
"Pregnant," Theo breathed.
Hermione put an arm around Sadie, "Eight weeks. It happened when you were on your honeymoon."
"Go figure," Draco said, patting Theo on the back.
Theo pulled away and began to pace the room, "Eight weeks, so it's due in March…well, that's a good star sign…it's not too cold, not too hot, but probably the best time to be pregnant. It would be horrible to be pregnant in the middle of summer-"
"Theo-"
"But this is good. It's good. It's a surprise; I mean, how did we even? On that night in Paris with the wine…oh bugger, it must have been that night…but it's good. If it's a girl, we can call it Almina. I always wanted to do that. I mean, as long as Sadie's okay with that-"
"Theo-"
"And I mean, we're young, but I've got enough money. I just need to get through training, but what if I get kicked out? What do we do then? Well, I could do other things, I am smart enough-"
Hermione got to her feet and slapped him, "Theo! Shut up."
All three of them watched him warily. This could go one of two ways, he could hug Sadie and come to his senses, or he could –
"Oh fuck, who am I kidding? I'd be a shit Dad, look at the only role model that I had. Sadie, you'd be better off leaving me."
"Theo-"
"No, no, that's a dick move. I'll leave you, but I'll give you money. You can raise the kid with Draco and Hermione. That would be better for everyone."
"No, it wouldn't!" Sadie snapped as she got to her feet.
"Calm down," Hermione said sternly, "You have a baby to look out for, and you already have high blood pressure, so sit down in that chair right now."
Sadie sat down and crossed her arms.
And Theo burst into tears.
Draco sighed and drew him into a hug, "It's going to be alright, Theo. You remember what you said to me when I freaked out after Pansy told me she was pregnant?"
"Not to drown yourself in the shower cause a bath would be better?" Theo asked tearfully.
"After that," Draco chuckled, "But it's good to know you haven't lost your sense of humour."
"I told you that you weren't your father," Theo mumbled into Draco's chest.
"Exactly," Draco said, "And you aren't yours either. You are a good person, and you are going to be a great father. Remember everything that we talked about in isolation? About how we're going to write the wrongs of our fathers? We're going to show our kids that we love them, and we're going to take them to Quidditch games, cheer them on, teach them that love is equal?"
Theo nodded and sniffed, "It's going to be okay."
"Yeah, it is," Draco said. He glanced at Sadie over Theo's shoulder, "Me and the guys will keep you on the straight and narrow at work, and we will all look after Sadie."
"Starting with getting her to St. Mungos for a check-up tomorrow," Hermione said pointedly.
"Are you going to take her?" Theo asked. He drew back from Draco and wiped his eyes, "Because I can't see how either of us will get away with not going to training."
"I don't think I'll get away with not going to work tomorrow," Hermione admitted, "I managed to slip away today, but I had to give a crazy Auror a decommissioned Auror box to do that."
"What the fuck?" Theo asked.
"Don't ask. He's Irish," Hermione said with a wave of her hand, "The point is, I don't see how I can get away with taking liberties like that two days in a row."
"You do know someone who can get away from work whenever they want," Draco pointed out.
"She'll kill me, though," Sadie muttered.
"Sadie, I don't think it will be that bad-"
"You weren't there when she found out that Pansy was pregnant," Theo cut in.
"That was different," Hermione said pointedly, "Pansy was only 17, and we were in the middle of a war. You are 19; you are married. You haven't done anything wrong."
Sadie sniffed and nodded, "I know."
"Bill lets her do whatever she wants," Hermione added, "So going to the appointment with you wouldn't be an issue."
Sadie sighed and nodded once more, "Can you get her to come over?"
Hermione nodded and glanced over at Draco, "Would you do the honours?"
"Why do I have to do it?" Draco asked.
"Because she's your crazy ex-girlfriend," Theo joked weakly.
Draco didn't even retaliate. He just walked to the fireplace and floo-ed Potter Manor. Theo sat down on the arm of Sadie's chair and kissed her forehead, "We'll get through this," he promised.
Sadie nodded and bit her lip as Daphne stepped out of the fireplace.
"What's going on?" She asked a little abrasively.
"I need your help," Sadie admitted.
"With?" Daphne asked. She glanced at the three solemn faces in the room, "And what's with the bodyguards?"
"With an appointment," Sadie said quietly. She caught her best friends eye, "I need you to come to St. Mungo's with me tomorrow because I'm pregnant."
"Pregnant?" Daphne echoed.
"Yes," Sadie said simply, "Eight weeks."
"Eight weeks," Daphne scoffed, "Your honeymoon?"
Sadie nodded, and Daphne looked up at Theo, "You idiot."
"It's not all my fault! She didn't cast the charm either. It's 50/50," Theo objected.
"Yes, but you knocked her up, Nott!" Daphne said as she punched him in the chest.
Theo winced, "She's my wife!"
"And? She's only 19!"
"Who cares?" Sadie snapped.
All eyes were drawn to the usually quiet, blonde woman.
"Who gives a shit, Daphne? He's my husband, and I love him," Sadie said simply, "He will be a wonderful father, and this is what we wanted. Yes, we didn't want it now, but if Tracey was here, she wouldn't be yelling at me! She'd say, what's meant for you won't pass you by."
The words of her dead best friend softened Daphne. She pulled Sadie into a hug and murmured in her ear, "I'm sorry."
"It's okay. I knew you'd do it," Sadie said, squeezing her friend tightly, "You did when Pansy told you she was pregnant too."
"Yes, well," Daphne said as she drew back, "Slytherin men are adept at getting their other halves pregnant at inopportune times."
Draco rolled his eyes, "Thanks for that painful reminder, Daphne," he said dryly.
"So, will you take me to St. Mungo's tomorrow?" Sadie asked.
"Of course I will, you idiot," Daphne said affectionately, "But right now, you need to go home, and you need to get her set up in bed with a warm hot water bottle, not too hot because that's not good for the baby. Make her a milky cup of tea and look after her, do you hear me?"
"Yes, Mum," Theo said with a slight smile.
"Thanks, Daph," Sadie echoed.
Daphne leant forward and kissed her on the cheek, "Get some rest, and I'll see you bright and early tomorrow."
Theo hooked his arm through his wife's, and they left the drawing-room.
"Thanks, Daphne," Hermione said, "I would have taken her, but I already had to take today off work when she came home from Egypt."
"It's fine; it's the least I can do," Daphne said. She opened the balcony door and breathed in the fresh air, "Once upon a time, I would have been the person she would have told."
"I'm sorry," Hermione said sheepishly.
"No, don't be," Daphne said. She leant against the railing and looked out into the darkness as cars rushed by on the streets below, "I'm glad that she has you."
"She has all of us," Draco said as he joined them, "And she's going to need all of us."
"This isn't going to be easy by any stretch of the imagination," Hermione agreed, "We're all going to need to check in on her and keep her occupied."
"Yeah," Daphne said. She leant against the railing and said, "Just do me a favour and don't get knocked up, okay? Because I can't deal with anymore surprise bloody pregnancies."
"Neither can I," Draco admitted.
"I won't," Hermione said with a smile, "I'm extremely careful."
"So am I," Daphne admitted, "The last thing I need is a baby on the way and a toddler."
"You'd be a sucker for punishment," Draco joked, "Do you want to stay for a cup of tea?"
"No, I need to go home and kill my fiancé."
"Why?" Hermione called as Daphne traipsed across the drawing-room.
"Because he brought a giant fucking snake home, and we are adopting a toddler!" Daphne answered before disappearing into the fireplace.
"Yeah," Draco said sheepishly, "He brought a Boa Constrictor home from our secret mission in the rainforest."
"He did what?"
When Daphne stepped into the kitchen of Potter Manor and saw Harry feeding Dave a dead rat, she lost it.
"Oh, for the love of fucking Merlin!"
Harry jumped, "What?"
"There is a fucking Boa Constrictor in my kitchen!" Daphne shrieked, "My future husband brought a giant fucking snake home, and my best friend is fucking pregnant!"
"Woah," Harry said, "Start from the beginning."
"There's a giant fucking snake-"
"Yeah, I know. I swear I'll build him a house tomorrow, so he's not in your kitchen," Harry said quickly, "Whose pregnant?"
"Sadie," Daphne said, throwing herself onto a stool at the breakfast bar, "She got pregnant on their honeymoon. I'm taking her into St. Mungos for a check-up tomorrow."
"Holy shit."
"Yeah."
"How are they both?" Harry asked.
"Shocked, but okay, I think," Daphne said with a shrug, "Hermione seemed to do a good job calming Sadie down today, and I'm sure Draco prevented Theo from having a full-blown breakdown."
"Is that why you're so upset?" Harry asked knowingly, "Because Sadie told Hermione before you."
"Yeah," Daphne admitted, "We used to be best friends, but now…."
"Things change, Daphne," Harry said softly, "People grow apart, and other people come together. You and Lilly are closer now."
"Not that close," Daphne muttered, "And sweet Salazar, what I would give to talk to-"
The floo roared to life.
Floo Signature: Lillian Moon.
"- Lilly right now," Daphne finished.
Harry chuckled, "Access granted."
Lilly's face appeared in the flames, "Hey Daph – oh my god! Why the fuck is there a Boa Constrictor in your kitchen?"
Daphne glared at Harry, "Thank you, Lilly! Thank you for being the only sane human in my bloody life right now! The Boa Constrictor is called Dave, and he brought him home from the fucking Amazon rain forest!"
"What the actual fuck, Harry?"
Harry scoffed, "Come on, Dave," he said as he put the snake on his shoulders, "We know where we're not wanted."
"Women," Dave hissed.
"It's not too late to call the wedding off, you know?" Lilly's voice said from the kitchen.
"Don't fucking tempt me," Daphne muttered in response.
* ~ TBC ~ *