It was 6:30PM on Wednesday, when Rafael entered his apartment, his hands full of grocery bags. "Rafi." His mother said, rushing toward him.

"What's wrong mami?" Rafael asked, seeing the worry all over her face. He felt his heart rate speed up. His mother took one of the grocery bags out of his hand, and walked to the kitchen. He followed her, and waited for her to answer his question.

Lucia placed the bag she was holding on a counter. seconds later she began to unpack it." I'm going to the store in a little while."

"Mami, I just got back from the store." Rafael stood close to his mother. He placed the bags he was holding on a counter.

"I'm sure you forgot something." Lucia answered, walking to the fridge, She placed a milk carton inside, and closed the door.

"Mami what's wrong?" Rafael repeated, trying not to panic

"I'm going. You need to talk to Olivia alone. I don't want to make her uncomfortable."

"You're scaring me." Rafael replied.

"I know." Luica sighed loudly.""Olivia and I were having a very nice conversation. After an hour, I saw she was exhausted. She didn't sleep last night, I suggested she take a nap, and she took my advice. About half an hour later I heard a blood-curdling scream. I ran to her room, and found her shaking. After a minute. She told me she was fine. I tried to comfort her, but nothing I said helped. She kept repeating she was fine until I left the room." Rafael didn't say a word. He quickly finished unpacking and putting away the groceries. Lucia walked out of the kitchen area, picked up her coat,. looked at her son, and spoke again. "I'll be back soon Rafi." She said, before exiting the apartment. She knew by the look on his face that her son was in deep thought.

BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB

2 minutes after his mother left the apartment., Rafael was prepared to talk to his best friend. He knocked softly on her closed bedroom door. "Liv?"

"Come in." She replied.

He slowly opened the door, and walked into the room. Olivia, as always, looked beautiful, but she also looked exhausted. She was wearing the black sweatshirt dress he bought her. "Are you Ok?" He asked, locking his eyes with hers.

"You're mother told you? I'm fine Rafa."

"No, you're not..You will be, you're not now though.."

"Yes I am. She answered quickly." I've had nightmares for a long time. It's nothing new."

"Liv, you have to deal with what happened to you."

"A lot has happened to me."

"You know what I mean. You have to deal with what recently happened to you. Have you called Dr. Lindstrom?"

"No."

"You can't stay silent forever." You need to talk to someone." Rafael wanted her to confide in him, he fought the urge to beg her to talk to him, because the truth was she was under no obligation to tell him anything, and he didn't want to make her feel obligated. "I want to help you get a restraining order. I can't do that if I don't know who hurt you."

"If there is a case. You can't be the ADA on it, and I'm relieved. I don't want you to go through that."

"You wanna spare me?" He laughed sarcastically."

"Yes, she said immediately.

"Olivia, no one expects you to deal with everything on your own."

"I expect it." She said softly.

"I know. You don't think anyone can handle hearing what you go through. You think no one is strong enough to deal with your pain, but you're wrong. I'm strong enough, and I'm always here for you. You have a whole squad of people who want to help you. Even the all power Olivia Benson needs to lean on someone sometimes. It's ok to be human."

Rafael watched a tear roll down Olivia's cheek. He rushed to the bed, and sat beside her. "I'm sorry. I was too harsh. "You haven't spoken to anyone about what happened. You need to bring the person who hurt you to justice. He whispered,

"You don't think I lean on you?" She replied. "I lean on you everyday. I'm just not ready yet."

"What would you say to a vitem?"

"I'm still processing." She paused for a long moment before speaking again. "Rafa I'm sorry. I know I haven't been myself since... before... before what happened . I'm working on it. I know I need to speak, I will."" Rafael nodded slowly. "Can we change the subject?" She added after a moment.

"My mother felt the need to go to the store, even though I just went shopping, and we have plenty of food. I bought your favorite ice cream.

"Are you trying to make me fat?"

"No, but you did lose weight Liv. Weight you didn't have to lose. Sometimes that happens when you're stressed." Olivia was shocked. In times of extreme stress she did lose weight . She never knew he noticed. "As much as I love my job, I'm happy to have some time off. " He gave her the half smile that always warmed her heart.

"What are you talking about?" She asked, confused. "You're in the middle of a trial."

"Liv, tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Don't worry. I'm happy the trial will continue after the holiday. I would be worried if the jury was out now. They would rush things to get home."

"How could I forget that." She almost whispered. "Rafa since I had him, I have never been away from Noah on Thanksgiving, on any holiday. I need to be with my son!" I have to leave."

Rafael squeezed her hand before she could get off the bed. "Who says you have to go anywhere? You think I would let you be away from Noah on Thanksgiving.? He's coming here."

"How?"

"How? I arranged everything. Don't worry about it." Olivia squeezed his hand , and held it like a lifeline. "Don't be so surprised, I have your back Olivia." He said, surprised and touched by her reaction.

"Thank-you", she said, her voice cracking.,tears glistened in her brown eyes

"Don't cry Liv. It will be nice to have this place full of people for a change. Fin's dropping by, Rollins and Carisi are joining us for dinner. and my mother will be here. She's happy I'm hosting."

"I have to apologize to your mother." Olivia said, mortified . "When she came in here...I... I... She wasn't prepared for what she saw,"

"You don't have to apologize. You have nothing to apologize for, and she's a lot tougher than she looks." He smiled. and Olivia smiled back. She knew her friend's words were true. Over the past weeks Olivia and Lucia had grown to know each other well. Olivia trusted, liked, and respected Lucia Barba. "When you go to bed tonight. I can stay with you if you want. We can stay here or go back to the couch."

"You don't have to do that."

"Do you want me to?"

"Yes." She answered softly, after a few seconds.

"OK, then I will." He answered, squeezing her hand again.

BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB

Fin arrived at Barba's apartment at noon on Thanksgiving Day, holding Noah in his arms. Olivia rushed over to take her sweet boy out of Fin's arms. and into her own. Olivia's voice cracked as she thanked Fin for his help. Fin smiled and moved away to give Olivia and her son one on one time together, He walked to the kitchen where Barba led him to the pie, They both took a piece, and walked to the dinning table where they quietly talked. Olivia held Noah in her arms for a half an hour before she placed him on the couch cushion beside her.

Sonny, Amanda, and Jesse arrived at Barba's at 2PM, just as Fin was getting up to leave. You leaving? " Amanda asked, approaching the dining table.

"Yeah", Fin replied, getting out of his seat. "I wish we could all eat together, but I gotta meet up with Ken. I'll host everybody next year." He walked to the door, opened it, and called over his shoulder.. Try the apple pie." He then exited.

"Thanks for inviting us." Sonny and Amanda said in unison.

"Thank-you for coming". Barba replied. He rose from his chair, walked over to the door and locked it,

"Where can I put this?" Sonny asked, holding up a new box for blocks for Noah and Jesse to play with.

"Near the couch" Barba answered.

Sonny listened, and made his way to the living area. He knelt down and set up the blocks. He looked up at Noah who was sitting on the couch happily holding his mother's hand. Olivia was smiling, and it was good for Sonny to see, he hadn't seen her smile like that in months. Barba and Noah served as good medicine for her.

By 3PM Noah and Jesse were eating what they could, by 4PM, they were done, and cleaned up. It was now 5PM. The adults were eating at the dining table while the kids were playing with blocks on her floor. "How ya doing Liv? Amanda asked, as she cut a piece of meat. She took a few bites, chewed, and swallowed.

"I'm fine Rollins. I'm doing good."

"You've been through a lot." Amanda replied, making eye contact with Olivia.

"I'm good Amanda."

"You can talk to me."

"Amanda, I'm great. The children are here. Don't worry I'm coming back to work."

"I know Liv. I never said you weren't. You'll get through this."

Carisi, Barba, and Lucia felt the tension building between the 2 women, and they didn't like it. Carisi cleared his throat and spoke quickly. "So Rollins and I are getting married on December 23, save the date. Amanda chose the month".

"Then Sonny decided it was important to him to be married by Christmas. Liv, I never asked. Will you be my Maid of Honor?" Amanda asked, hopefully.

"Of course Amanda." Olivia said with a smile. she was touched by Amanda's request, She was relieved that Carisi changed the subject. The focus was no longer on her.

"Mrs. Barba," Carisi added "We would love it if you come"

"I'll be there, I'm honored that you would ask me", Lucia answered.

"Rafael." Carisi continued. "Will you be my best man?

"Sonny, I'd be happy to. Thank-you for asking me. The 2 of you are very lucky to have each other." As he spoke to Sonny, his green eyes drifted to Olivia.