38.

Pansy:

Gryffindor vs. Slytherin.

Who would think that Pansy liked to study? Or well, rather, the reward after studying.

They were, again, in one of the unused rooms at Hogwarts. Hermione smiled proudly, because the mouse her girlfriend had been practicing with for Transfiguration had turned invisible, bones included (sometimes it would partially fade it and there was only a white skeleton left on the table that moved, turning the head from side to side, which was pretty gross to see). Pansy raised her arms up, stretching. She was really very tired from trying so hard lately. Even though she didn't tell Hermione, she practiced alone in her bedroom when she had free time or after dinner, until all her classmates arrived and went to sleep. Sophie would give her advice sometimes, even if she wasn't as good at Transfiguration as Hermione, she was still good at it. Rachel only listened to music and tried to distract her when she was around, until Sophie kicked her out of the bedrooms "for being tiresome."

"I'm so happy," Hermione said, facing her once the mouse returned to normal. "I knew it would work out for you."

"Well... you corrected several things for me that I had no idea were wrong. The books didn't say that. It's thanks to you. And McGonagall's guidance, of course. She surely would hate not getting part of the credit."

"If you would pay more attention in class..." she scolded her, going to one of the windows to free the mouse. Hermione used to say that if they were forced to practice with animals, then at least they could leave them alone to get on with their lives instead of locking them in cages.

"I listen to McGonagall," she defended herself.

"And if you took more time to sit down and practice…"

Pansy giggled guiltily, and deflected the subject:

"Whatever. And my prize?"

"Did you win something?" She returned, with a raised eyebrow and crossed arms.

"Well, my great magical ability deserves it."

"Of course," she murmured, rolling her eyes.

She approached Hermione with a smug smile, happy to tease.

"You know, Pansy You can just ask me for a kiss, instead of making excuses."

"That's not fun," she said, as she extended her arms to rest on Hermione's shoulders, crossing her wrists over the back of her head, trapping her in a kind of hug.

Hermione glanced toward the door, making sure it was still closed. Whenever there were these kinds of advances in this room she would get nervous, so she would search around with a nervous attitude, as if a teacher were going to catch them on the spot.

"Nobody will come."

Pansy's attempt to calm her, resulted in the opposite, as Hermione tensed a bit, starting to blush.

"What, you don't want me?" She teased, almost touching her nose to Hermione's.

She didn't answer her, she just blushed more. Pansy gave a silent laugh.

"Are you thinking the wrong things, Granger?" She asked then, with a more flirtatious tone and a sly smile spreading across her face.

"Of course not," she answered quickly.

"How pretty you look when you lie," she teased her, releasing her neck.

Pansy walked over to one of the tables, sitting on it. She crossed her legs, leaving one of her hands on her knees and the other supporting her on the wood. She gloated at having Hermione's undivided attention, especially since for a few seconds she had been lost in places other than her face. She felt confident in this position, which she needed to feel in order to stick with what she had in mind.

"Tables aren't seats," she scolded her.

"Well, try to enforce the rules, Prefect," she scoffed.

Hermione was quiet for a few seconds, she seemed nervous, but managed to articulate confidently:

"You are not subtle."

Pansy shrugged as she raised one of her eyebrows. "So?" she seemed to say with her body.

"You want me to come closer so you can kiss me," Hermione said angrily, pointing out the obvious. "Your excuses are weak."

"Do you want me to be direct?" She was exasperated. "Come."

Hermione's face was still red, but she moved closer. She was too proud not to.

"You know what I can't help thinking?" Pansy asked once they were close. Hermione looked into her eyes, waiting for her to continue.

"What?" She spluttered in bewilderment.

Pansy pursed her lips to keep from laughing. She was curious, too curious. Hermione was very closed on these issues, especially when it came to talking about them. So how could she know what she wanted? Pressing, clearly. She came to that conclusion after her impromptu "sex education talk" days ago. Because despite all the times she denied it, she knew well now that Hermione at the very least would have imagined it. She thought about that too, and the more she did it, the less she wanted to tease Hermione and the more she wanted to goad her... I mean, they're a couple! She still remembered the sting on her lips from the kiss they shared in the Astronomy Tower. She wanted that. She wanted more than that.

"You dreamed of me."

"Of course not," Hermione denied, taking a step back.

"Or more than once?" She continued, grabbing her hand to keep her from walking away.

"Pansy," she muttered irritably.

"I did dream of you."

"No...!" She yelled, but didn't finish the sentence. "What? Your...? You did?" She asked curiously.

"Oh, is that what you want to talk about?"

She was offended and again tried to escape, so Pansy slid off the table, chasing her. As soon as she stopped, she put her arms around Hermione, before she took even three steps away from her. She seemed surprised by the gesture, enough to keep still and forget about her escape intentions. Pansy snuggled closer to her body, lowering her head to hide her face in her neck. She heard an annoyed sigh, followed by arms hugging her as well.

This was another position she felt confident in, but a different one, a less arrogant one that showed the confidence she felt with, and for Hermione.

"Aren't you mad at my little joke anymore?" Pansy whispered.

"Do you always have to try to upset me and make me nervous?"

She gave a choked "aha" in response, and she could bet Hermione let a smile escaped because of that, as she tightened her arms around Pansy's waist, pulling her closer.

"It's a good icebreaker," she added, keeping her tone low.

Her statement was honest. What other way was there to test the waters? But Hermione didn't speak, nor did she move, perhaps thinking she was teasing her again, so she dragged her cheek up her shoulder, getting close enough to her neck that she could give her a quick kiss there.

"Pansy," she sighed, low.

She really liked the sound, so she repeated the action again. She felt Hermione stir, but she didn't seem uncomfortable, she wasn't trying to pull away. She moved up, kissing closer to her jaw now. Hermione's head moved up a bit, allowing her more room. She felt her crazed heartbeat as she pressed her lips to her skin, so she stood there savoring the moment. Pansy's heart raced even more, competing with the other. Again she moved, but now to kiss the edge of her jaw; distributed several kisses throughout it. She straightened then, when she reached her chin, searching her face. Their eyes met and she didn't have time for anything else, as Hermione lunged for her.

They had never initiated a kiss like this, in such a... fierce way. Her legs collided with the desk behind her, she had recoiled from inertia, from the way Hermione pushed to get to her mouth. She released the hug, bringing a hand to the edge of the table, grabbing it to regain her balance; the other stayed at her waist, and she moved it to caress the small of Hermione's back. Her body pressed harder against her, and since she couldn't move further back across the desk, the friction was pleasant. Feeling the tongue on her lips, asking for access, she opened her mouth wider. Hermione's hands were making her desperate, moving around her waist, one of them in a position that also allowed her to touch part of her abdomen. Without thinking, she stopped grabbing the desk to stroke one of Hermione's legs. She tightened her grip on the exposed skin near her knees and then climbed up, her palm stroking the trail until she reached the hem of her skirt. Hermione then stopped invading her mouth to give gentle suction to her lower lip and mimicked her actions, leaving her waist to place her hands on her legs. She stroked the top of her knees with her thumb, then moved up the outer side of her thighs, reaching the back of them. Her hands were so soft that her touch almost didn't tickle her. Hermione kept stroking, never trying to penetrate the clothes. She insisted, pressed herself more against her... until a soft gasp escaped Pansy. That seemed to alert the other, as she parted their mouths to look into her eyes again.

"Excuse me," Hermione murmured.

Pansy could have scoffed, said sarcastically "no, thank you," but she didn't feel quite in the best shape to do so. And looking closely, Hermione didn't seem much better.

"Well," Pansy cleared her throat. "You certainly did win the award."

With her "ice breaker" joke, she got Hermione to blush and turn her face. She restrained herself not to tell her that she looked cute, out of pity for her, that she would surely turn redder. She took advantage of the silence to try to calm herself.

"Should we leave?" Hermione asked shyly.

She swallowed hard in reaction, because it showed in her voice: she was certainly not the only one in the room somewhat embarrassed.

"Pansy?" She insisted.

"Ah, the question" she recalled. The truth is, she had no desire to leave that room. She wanted to continue. Didn't Hermione want it too?

"Today is the Gryffindor game, remember?"

And then she hated the world even more than she already hated it. How long until the game? Fifteen, thirty minutes? She had forgotten that something existed outside these four walls. But not remembering it didn't make it unreal. If they kept going, they weren't going to any games, at least if it was up to Pansy to stop.

Today it would be decided which house would get the Quidditch cup, Hufflepuff or Gryffindor. She didn't have a choice, did she? Hermione is very loyal to her friends and several of them are part of the team. They had already agreed this afternoon to meet Ginny and Luna in the stands, too. What excuse could she make for missing the game? Or did Hermione even want to miss it?

"Yeah, come on," she agreed reluctantly.

Hermione gave her a soft smile, and she couldn't help catching herself and mimicking it. Pansy smoothed her clothes, while the other nervously arranged her hair (which was funny because it wasn't like Pansy had been touching her hair, so it could be tangled).

"Hey," Pansy stopped her before she opened the door.

She leaned closer, indicating to turn around and release the doorknob, and then ran her thumb across Hermione's lower lip.

"A small lipstick stain," she clarified to her stunned face and embarrassed by the gesture.

"Oh... err..." She swallowed. "Thank you," she said, turning quickly on her heel to open, now without interruption, the door.

. . .

As they left the room, they both went opposite directions. Each one had to go change their uniform before going to the stands and they didn't have much time left...

Pansy walked into their common room and heard no voices or laughter. As the game was about to start, she was not surprised to note that the place was empty. Most in Slytherin would go to support Hufflepuff today, somewhat ironic if you thought they were disqualified because of them. All in order to oppose Gryffindor!

She didn't want to waste time so she picked up her pace. By chance, she noticed that there was someone in the armchairs. One of the single person green ones placed in front of the extinguished fireplace. She would have ignored her and gone on her way if that person had not noticed her too and turned around. It was Daphne. She seemed surprised that someone had actually entered the common room now. And the most curious thing was to notice that she was crying.

Pansy looked away, uncomfortable, and kept walking towards her bedrooms, wanting to pretend she didn't see anything.

"What are you doing here?" Daphne growled, wiping any trace of sadness from her face.

Pansy sighed, fearing the worst. She turned, raised her hands to indicate that she was not planning to attack, and replied:

"I'm just going to change my clothes. I'll be leaving right away."

"You must be very happy," she muttered.

She didn't know what to answer, so she tried again to escape to her bedroom. She had no interest in fighting Daphne. It was a good day, too good, she wasn't going to ruin it.

"Are you really proud to be in a relationship with a Mudblood?"

"Don't call her that," she hissed angrily, looking into her eyes. Daphne was hell-bent on pushing, perhaps feeling vulnerable at being caught crying.

"Oh, did I offend you?" She asked, with a smug smile.

She clenched her fists, took a breath to compose herself, and went to her bedroom to change. She chose the first shirt and pants she saw, dressed in a hurry, and went out again, determined to ignore Daphne and go with Hermione.

"I saw you with Isa the other day, they seemed to be having fun," Daphne said.

She was blocking the door, arms crossed. She ignored her, moving to the right to try to dodge her and get out. Daphne extended her arm, resting her hand on the right wall, blocking her way.

"Are you having fun talking bad about me?"

"I'm not trying to fight you Daphne. Can't you just ignore me like the rest? Draco, Blaise... They don't even glance at me and that's it. Can't you do the same?"

"You humiliated me on Valentine's Day."

"Uh... Hello, do you suffer from memory loss? You attacked me for half a year without rest!?"

After meeting her in Hogsmeade on Valentine's Day, they hadn't met in a fight again, much to her relief. Daphne seemed to avoid her, she didn't know if it was because she had really scared her or just didn't want to find herself in an unfavorable situation again, but she did, rather than some derogatory comment in the hallways she didn't make. Pansy now always had people around her, if she wasn't with Sophie and Rachel, and even her other roommates, she was with Hermione and several other Gryffindors (and also Luna, of course); maybe that's why Daphne had less interest in looking for trouble.

Besides, why did Isa matter in all this? As far as she knew, Isa and Daphne only spoke a couple of times and went on a Valentine's date together... Nothing very remarkable.

She tried to escape to the left, but was again cut off.

"What do you want from me?" Pansy got mad. "I didn't do anything to you. Literally nothing. I understand it, yes? We were competitive with each other in a thousand things, but it is not like that anymore. You won, congratulations. You are 'the princess' here. Leave me alone."

"I won?" She screeched. "You always took everything from me. And you keep doing it!"

"Pardon?"

"I was friends with Isa! Not you!"

"What?" She was taken aback. "Isa spoke to me, I didn't look for anything. Why is it my fault that you were a monumental moron and they got tired of you?"

Daphne pulled out her wand and pointed it straight at her face. Pansy raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Why do you always have to talk too much?" she lamented. She took a step back, but the wand was still pointed straight at her forehead, not deviating even a millimeter.

"As children I started to like Draco and you then became infatuated with him, and he managed to like you better than me."

"I don't..." Pansy tried to defend herself, but Daphne wouldn't let her speak.

"I became interested in fashion, my family's work. But of course you too, huh? And of course, they all highlighted how well you knew how to dress or apply makeup! I'm part of the Greengrass family, fashion is my thing. You shouldn't be better than me at that!"

"I wasn't trying to surpass you to piss you off!"

"According to everyone, you were funnier, more cunning, more educated. They all preferred you," she hissed in anger and pain. Daphne's eyes were wet again, gathering tears.

"And you are the most beautiful! Everyone says it, you're not just the cutest in Slytherin, but in the whole damn castle.'

"What good is that to me ?! Draco didn't prefer me for being prettier. Isa either. In the end they all went with you." Her voice finally broke and with a jocular, sad tone, she added," In the long run, people want more than just a pretty blonde face. They prefer someone with personality.'

"That's what all this is about?" She was exasperated. "Just because you're jealous of me, I have to put up with you?"

"I was so happy at the beginning of this year! You were broke. Draco and everyone spoke so bad about you, if you had listened to them... my friends, everyone, preferred me. I was able to give you back all the pain you caused me."

"I insist: I never tried to hurt you." Pansy was starting to get nervous, because Daphne kept pointing her wand at her, and she seemed more and more angry.

"But I was barely able to enjoy it, since everything started to work out for you again," she advanced, keeping a firm grip on her wand. Pansy backed away further, unsure whether or not to draw her wand, doing so could start a duel. "Draco was the first to stop laughing at my jokes, then the others. Again I was an ornament there, even without you. Instead, you, you made a lot of new friends, just like that, so easy. But Isa cared about me. I also had someone."

"Oh shit" Pansy thought, as she noticed how the couch prevented her from escaping.

"They really heard me. And I them. We got along well. Until you blew it!"

"I didn't do anything," she growled, tired of that subjective view of events. "You decided to attack me. You disappointed Isa alone."

"Pulse!" She exclaimed.

Pansy hissed in pain as she hit the ground. She had been sent through the air, backward over the chairs, landing on her left arm. It hurt, it hurt a lot. Tears gathered in her eyes and she had a hard time remembering how to inhale again, breathe again. She groped at her clothes as fast as she could with her right hand, grabbing her wand. She raised her arm, pointing at Daphne.

"This is stupid," Pansy remarked in a choked voice. "I don't want to fight."

"I hate you," she growled, beginning to wave her wand to cast another spell, but was stopped by a hand that held her tightly by the wrist.

Daphne widened her eyes in dread, turning her head. Isa was looking at her face, they seemed to be horrified by what they were witnessing. The anger in Daphne's eyes disappeared, scared too, she was even a little pale.

"Isa... I..."

"Are you okay, Pansy?" They asked, ignoring Daphne as they released her.

They held out their hand to help her up. As she stood up, several tears fell. Pansy looked at her left arm in reaction, at the sharp stab of pain that shot through it. Isa touched it, trying to be gentle, but stopped immediately when they heard Pansy's moan.

"I think... Ehm. The infirmary? Yes, the infirmary. We need to go," Isa decided hastily. They seemed afraid to take command.

"Isa," Daphne tried again.

This time Isa looked at her, they seemed to scream silently that they disliked her, only that they were too kind to show it. Daphne's face contorted in pain and as soon as she blinked in puzzlement, she began to cry.

"Don't hate me," she sobbed, bringing her hands to her face, to cover the tears.

Isa said nothing, just looked at the ground in discomfort and advanced towards the door.

"Can you walk? Is your arm the only thing that hurts?" They said, as they held the doorknob.

"I'm good."

They nodded then, opening the door and moving to the side, so Pansy could get out. Before Isa closed the door, she heard a louder sob coming from the common room. Daphne sounded torn. And although she had no cause to feel empathy for her, she did: she felt sorry for her.

. . .

When she got to the infirmary, Isa was quickly kicked out. Pomfrey gave them a quick "thank you" for helping their housemate and didn't let them stay. Pansy almost laughed at their look of shock and surprise when the door was slammed in their face.

According to the nurse, she had broken her arm in the fall. She didn't feel like she had landed hard enough to do so, and Pomfrey seemed amused by her observation.

"Sometimes the dumbest falls are the worst," she explained to Pansy. "Many falls from a broomstick at Quidditch matches are nothing more than a scare and a broken bone or two. For the gravity of falling from such heights, silly. But you have no idea what a mess I had to attend to because of a silly slip in the shower. Or by some distracted student who stuck her wand in the eye of a classmate; that happens every so often in the first year, everyone is too excited and nervous."

Pansy winced at the anecdotes as she watched the nurse work. She took a potion out of one of her cabinets after a quick general examination: making sure that when she fell she had not also hit her head, check that there were no bruises...

"Drink it all. Then I'll give you some juice to clean the taste."

Not wanting to obey, she raised the potion to her mouth and gulped it down. She wrinkled her nose at the taste, it was one of the most disgusting things she had ever had the misfortune to taste. I will no longer complain about my mother's food, she thought, grabbing the cranberry juice the nurse had served her.

"You'll have to stay here for a few hours, until the bone is finished mending. It is possible that it will exhaust you, because of the pain and the energy it consumes from your body. If you need to sleep, you can stay as long as you want."

"Can't I go back to my bedroom now?"

"No. You will stay here until you are completely healed, Parkinson."

Pansy snorted, earning a scolding look from Pomfrey. She sat on the bed since she was not sleepy, using the backrest to support her back, like a makeshift chair. She winced as she moved, so she tried to adjust her arm so that it was in a firmer position and wouldn't continue to bother her until she healed.

The infirmary door opened. Hermione was there, next to Isa. Pomfrey sighed in annoyance, but nodded, allowing them to enter.

"What were you thinking?!" Hermione asked hysterically.

She didn't seem to want an answer. She'd been scared, and she was channeling the feeling in anger, scolding Pansy. Her arms were crossed, but she softened the gesture as she looked at the arm.

"What happened? Does it hurt?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine," Pansy soothed. "A broken bone."

"Isa told me you were here."

"I thought you wanted me to," Isa explained. "I tried looking for Rachel and Sophie too, but couldn't find them…"

"On the Hufflepuff bleachers, probably," she deduced, amused. "Who won?"

"Gryffindor, they must be celebrating now," Isa replied.

"I can't believe Greengrass…" Hermione muttered, not interested in the outcome of the match. "What the hell is wrong with her?"

"Luckily they helped me," she confessed, she sought Isa's gaze. "Thanks."

"It's nothing. I don't like Quidditch matches, so I was napping in my bedroom when I heard the noise. There was also my friend Chris, but he sleeps like a dead man."

"Why did Daphne attack you?" Hermione asked.

"She was jealous because I'm friends with Isa, it seems."

"I... I'm sorry to be another cause for you to have trouble with her."

"It's not your fault, Isa," Pansy said. "I think... I've never really understood Daphne until now. It seems that she is the type of person who would blame anyone else in the world to be the victim. She doesn't know how to see things otherwise. If she hadn't been jealous of me, she would have found another cause to hate me more."

"Were you a couple?" Hermione asked, looking at Isa.

"No. I liked her, but... I didn't like what I saw when I got to know her better."

"She really grew fond of you," Pansy pointed out.

Isa seemed a little embarrassed. They put a hand to the back of their neck, scratching it.

"She's nice when she wants," they admitted. "Did you know that she can play the piano? But not compose, just play classical music. Classes that she had to take because of her parents. She… has a lot of interesting things." Isa smiled, remembering something. "When she really laughs, she has that "piggy" laugh. I found it adorable when I found out."

Pansy pursed her lips to keep from laughing about that detail. She was sure Isa wasn't saying it as a criticism, but as a good and cool feature of her. But surely Daphne would not see it the same.

"But then… in the blink of an eye, on our date during Valentine's Day, she went from telling me about a song that she really liked and that she would like to learn to play, to trying to harass you. I just... I could only think "what the heck?" I tried to stay out of it, not get involved, I didn't even know what to think. Was that part of her? I didn't like it at all, I always knew she was a little frivolous, but... that was too much. After that day I started avoiding her, I didn't even want to talk to her. She took offense and started avoiding me too."

"The Slytherins and their self-sabotage desires," Hermione concluded, letting out a sigh.

"What are you talking about?" Pansy asked with an arched brow.

"I don't know everything that happened, but it's a shame that she overshadows her good things with anger, jealousy, envy... You did that to me, Pansy, earlier this year. You were trying to be cruel to me to push me away because you were afraid. Like I said: self-sabotage."

"I am hurt and you call me a coward?" she grumbled.

Hermione giggled and then leaned in to kiss her on the cheek.

"I'll be brave for both of us, don't worry."

Pansy clicked her tongue, trying to look angry, but the smile escaped her helplessly.

Besides, she had to admit that her girlfriend was right. Daphne didn't realize that she could be more than a pretty face, that she was the only one getting stuck. And she took it out on everyone for it, ruined her friendships, isolated herself... for no reason. Pansy came back to the same conclusion: she felt sorry for her. After all, she could somehow identify herself.

Isa and Hermione were talking about the details of the fight. She overheard Hermione saying that she went to warn Professor McGonagall about this before coming to the infirmary, just in case Snape would turn a blind eye and let Daphne get away with it. Pansy made a face of disgust at that, as Daphne had a lot of points deducted, Slytherin would have trouble winning the house cup... but she knew it was the right thing to do. Not because she was angry, which yes, she was, a lot, her arm hurt terribly. But because Daphne needed a wake-up call. Perhaps with luck, she would learn from her mistakes that way, just as she herself did when she met Hermione.

She wondered at the fact that she was thinking about this whole situation in a very mature way. Daphne caused her a lot of pain. But instead of wanting revenge, she just wished that she could become a better person in the future, that she would no longer be the type of person who takes it out on others. Hermione would be very proud right now if she could hear her thoughts.

She wished McGonagall or Dumbledore could hear her thoughts too, so they would give her house points for this. Just as during their first year they did with Harry, Ron, Hermione and Neville, making Gryffindor win the cup. She could almost hear the voice of the director in her mind: "A good person always wishes good things for her friends, but also, she does not wish evil on her enemies." How cool would it be to beat Gryffindor like that!