I'm very pleased everyone is enjoying reading this arc as I am writing it. Start the fic.
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The morning came fast. A plan was already concocted, using the butler uniforms they would have a double cover posing as government agents to gain access to the Mystery Shack and their younger doubles. They would each wear a couple of butler outfits and hope it would be enough to fool the locals. However, to keep their identities even more secret they agreed to dye their hairs.
Dipper volunteered to go first. He laid back in the recliner chair, resting his head in the sink behind him.
"This chair from the living room was easier to move than I thought it would be."
"That's a popular opinion."
"I'm up for this but I can't seem to figure out what color you want to dye your hair. I mean, I picked black because it seems like it would be the easiest to come back from; but you? I'll be honest, I've been racking my brain over what you would choose. I know I should have just asked but you know how I love a mystery. So I tried to figure out which ones you wouldn't want, first to be eliminated was blonde because duh!"
"I'm just going to choose onyx, Dipper. People give us less thought if we actually match."
"Onyx? Don't you mean black? I mean, aren't they the same thing?"
"Of course you would say that. You don't come from money."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means exactly what it means. Now hold still, I need to start."
Later...
The Northwest construction crew wasted no time in dismantling the cabin. This was fine as Dipper and Pacifica had already left and were headed into town.
"Okay, our ensemble is almost complete. We just need some black sunglasses."
"Why black sunglasses?" asked Pacifica.
"It completes the whole government agent look and they less they recognize about us the better."
"...The fact that we match should be enough to throw them off."
"Better safe than sorry."
Walking the streets of Gravity Falls it didn't take long for Dipper to be swept up in nostalgia.
"Just look at this town! This is exactly how it's supposed to be!"
Pacifica rested her face in her palm. "Oh boy, here we go."
"All the stores are family owned, people are just walking about enjoying the day..."
"Dangerous monsters watching them from the woods."
"Dangerous monsters watching them from the... I see what you did there."
"Everyone in this town ends up missing you and your sister. Everyone, even the monsters, missed you!
"Well you know I would have come back if I could."
"I know, your parents stopped you when you were kids... but your not kids now."
"...Pacifica, exactly what are you trying to say?"
"I'm just going to be straight with you. I think you and Mabel should come and visit Gravity Falls, back in our time."
"Wow! That's... I don't know."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Well look at this place, it's perfect the way it is! Neither Mabel or I want to ruin that mental image from when we were kids."
"Dipper, perfection is an impossibility. You and Mabel taught me that."
"Technically you're right but the imperfections of the town and the people in it are what makes Gravity Falls perfect. And as a town grows and evolves some of these imperfections are removed or improved, what they don't realize is they might lose little by little what makes their town great."
"...Dipper... Sigh. Alright, we don't have time discussion on this. Let's just find some sunglasses and head off to the Mystery Shack, but know that this conversation isn't over!"
Gravity Falls woods...
"Okay so here's the plan, our younger selves were actually witnesses to a federal crime last night and we need to question them."
"And what do we do if this case last more than a day?"
"We say the 'incident' was bigger than we thought and need more questioning with them."
They were approaching the Mystery Shack and Pacifica was admiring her handiwork on Dipper's disguise, just a little hair dye and and a tux and he looked like a completely different person. Of course she did have to apply some cover up on his birthmark but he raised no objections about it. A brief case in her hand, her purse on her shoulder (there was just some things she refused to give up on), and a spring in her step she kept pace with Dipper pretty evenly.
However, she was so focused on her appraisal she didn't see where she was going and nearly fell. Luckily, Dipper managed to catch her but she got a full view that this wasn't some gopher hole she tripped over. It was a hella big hole; she couldn't even see the bottom... it was all just blackness.
"Trust me! Out of all the attractions here, you don't want to fall into the bottomless pit. There is literally nothing bottomless!"
"Yipe."
"Try to be more careful."
"Sure thing!"
Dipper and Pacifica walked around the bottomless pit not knowing that it would play a pivotal part in the final case together.
As they got closer to the Mystery Shack, Dipper felt like the bushes and trees were closing in on him.
'Has the forest always been this close to the Mystery Shack, or is it just because I'm bigger now? No! That doesn't make any sense, it wasn't like this when I went to visit Soos. Then again, he probably did do grounds keeping since my thirteenth birthday. Maybe I'm just nervous... Wait, why would I be nervous? I thought of everything!'
"Ah what a wonderful day to sucker idiots out of their money!"
The familiar voice resonated with Dipper, bringing forth a flood of different emotions. He stood perfectly still, his vision started to blur from the tears welling up in his eyes.
"Grunkle Stan!"
Dipper took two large steps towards his great uncle before Pacifica tackled him into the bushes. His torso was trapped in the vice grip of her hug, pinning him to the ground.
"Pacifica! Let me go, Grunkle Stan is alive in this time period!"
"Dipper, no! We have to keep a low profile, remember?"
"So what?! I'm sure we could let him in on this! We already let our younger selves in on it!"
"Dipper, we BOTH know that's because you and I don't remember this adventure! Because of this there's a smaller chance of polluting the time stream, but if you let your whole family know then there's no way..."
"Well why not just Grunkle Stan?! He could help us and I could..."
Pacifica held him tighter. "I'm sorry, but you know why we can't! He has to stay in the dark as much as possible!"
"But he's alive now! He's right there! I-I..."
"I know! I know, but you can't let him know who you are!"
"But I still have so much I need to say to him!"
"I'm sorry! We should've seen this coming!"
"But can't I even just talk to him? Can't I even just say 'hello'? He's back!"
"No! He's not! WE'RE back! This Grunkle Stan just happens to be alive in this period of time! I'm sorry! I know this must hurt!"
She looked up at him with tear filled eyes. "But you already know why you can't let him know who we are!"
"I... know you're right but..."
Pacifica sat up and held Dipper's chin in her hands. "I know this going to be tough, but I need you to be the man that I know you are and listen to your head."
Dipper solemnly nodded in agreement. "You're right, Pacifica. If I really care about Grunkle Stan than I can't drag him into this just so I can spend more time with him." Dipper took off his sunglasses to reveal his eyes and face had gotten rather red and puffy from his tears. "Look at me, Pacifica. I'm pretty sure government agents aren't supposed to look like this."
Pacifica offered a sympathetic smile and opened the briefcase to reveal her deluxe make up kit inside.
"I can help with that."
The Mystery Shack...
Wendy was sitting at the cashier desk with her feet up on the table, reading a magazine. She had been thinking about her little chat with Dipper after their adventure with the shapeshifter, the little guy had been friendzoned pretty hard and Wendy was considering giving him more space. She couldn't complain too hard though, the floor show had been pretty entertaining so far.
"For the last time, I did not come here to offer an olive branch!" snapped Pacifica.
The heiress was dressed incognito and was currently trying to stay at arm's length away from Mabel.
"Sure you did! Why else would you give back the party crown!"
"I wanted to offer a rematch and your pig just snatched it out of my hands!"
"He's a pig, he thinks it food, that crown doesn't belong to either of us now!"
They had been going back forth like this for about an hour now and Wendy already had to choke back a couple of laughs.
The sudden jingling of bells alerted her to a new customer entering the gift shop.
In walked a man and woman wearing tuxedos and sunglasses. Wendy squinted her eyes at the man, there was something familiar about him but she couldn't quite place it.
They immediately caught everyone's attention, especially Mabel's.
"Huh. Manly build, rugged chin, as tall as Grunkle Stan... all the right ingredients for a instant crush... so why do I feel nothing when I look at him? Oh my glitter! Am I... growing out of my boy crazy phase?! NOOOOOOOOOOO! I need girl support! Stat! I HAVE TO CALL CANDY AND GRENDA!"
Mabel dashed out of the room in a panic just as Grunkle Stan walked in.
"Government agents! Oh Sweet Moses!"
"Calm down, Mr. Pines!" Adult Pacifica soothed. "I'm Agent Southeast and this is Agent Cedar."
Adult Pacifica non-verbally signaled for Adult Dipper to pick up where she left off but it never came. An awkward silence filled the room as Adult Dipper stood still, unanswering the question, just staring at the old man in wonder. Adult Pacifica delivered a sharp elbow to his ribs to snap him out of his stupor.
"We're here to see the kid known as Dipper!" Adult Dipper's voice was hoarse and cracked in a very unprofessional tone.
Adult Pacifica took a step forward to try and preserve the tough as steel image government agents were supposed to present.
"We believe he and the precious little blonde girl witnessed a federal crime." explained Adult Pacifica.
Grunkle Stan jumped back.
"Involving illegal dangerous waste management?!"
"I...What? No! It..."
"Involving fraud?!"
"No! They just witnessed..."
"Pug traff..."
"No! This doesn't involve any of your Get Money Shenanigans! You are INNOCENT for once! Deal with it!"
Grunkle Stan was about to ask a question when a green paper airplane flew past both of them.
"What the...? Wait! Was that a five hundred dollar bill?!"
The 'government agents' exchanged a look but said nothing.
"Not that I need to chase after it or anything! Pfft! Yeah right!" Grunkle Stan scoffed.
The money paper airplane flew out the door and Grunkle Stan started to sweat. Three seconds went by and then Grunkle Stan ran out the door.
"MOOOONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!"
"Wait! Stan!" Wendy chased after him. "That better be for me! You still owe me three months pay!"
Young Pacifica walked over to the Mystery Couple.
"You're, like, welcome! A five hundred is smallest I have on me so, like, consider yourselves lucky I... Hey! Are you, like, okay?"
Adult Dipper was doubled over breathing heavily while Adult Pacifica was trying to comfort him.
"You have to understand, Stan was already an old man by today's standards. For him, it's like having a ghost visit him."
"Ghosts are stupid! I could never be bothered by such a... what's with the look? You're looking at me like that's a problem I'll have to face one day. Cut it out!"
"We have to get moving! They won't be outside forever!" Dipper commented.
Outside...
Grunkle Stan danced a cocky jig now that he had caught the money airplane. Wendy on the other hand was out of breath, holding her hands on her knees, trying to recuperate.
"For an old man, you can really move when you want to!"
"Here's a little secret, Wendy. I'm not just collecting money for me; before I came to Gravity Falls I was raising a little girl with a young woman I dated once. Couldn't make the relationship work so I left, but every now and then I still send that kid some money. I understand she has a pretty good life at the moment, calls herself Star-Fan-something-with-a-bunch-of-numbers!"
"Hey, Mr. Pines!"
Grunkle Stan jumped at Soos' sudden appearance.
"Gotta get a bell for you! Well whatever, where'd you disappear to?"
"I saw this dot while I was sweeping the parking lot and I just had to catch the thing, dude."
"...I worry about you Soos."
"...Yes!"
Back inside...
"We don't have a lot of time! Where's my younger self?"
"Upstairs on some weird conspiracy board trying to plot out where the shapeshifter is." explained Young Pacifica.
"Go get him! We need to get moving!"
"Alright, I'll try!"
Young Pacifica went further inside until she was at the foot of the stairs.
"Hey Sherman! Mr. Peabody wants to talk to us! Get your butt down here!" shouted Young Pacifica.
"Bite me, Penny!"
"What did you say, you little troll?!"
The long distance bickering continued for a minute or two until their adult selves decided the three of them should just make their way up the stairs to the shared bedroom. The nostalgia slapped in the face as he looked around the room. The roof was a lot shorter than he remembered but that was probably because he was an adult now, and his and Mabel's makeshift mini-golf course was still there but it was a little damper than he remembered.
Young Pacifica on the other hand was overly grossed out at how much of slob the young boy was.
"This is the guy who you want to be with instead of being rich?!" Young Pacifica asked her older self.
"Oh he does grow out of some things!"
"Like what?"
"Like leaving his underwear everywhere."
"Wha...EWWW!"
Adult Dipper had regained his composure while Young Dipper looked ready for business. A pen in his mouth and journal in his hand, the kid looked like he had been up all night researching.
"I've been going over it on my conspiracy board and I'm afraid we're looking at our worst fear come to light! There's no way how the shapeshifter hasn't already journeyed into town! We can never trust anyone again!"
The Pacificas gasped but Adult Dipper wasn't having it. He snatched Journal #3 from his younger self.
"Not while I have something to say about it!"
He put the book on the bed and grabbed a black light. He turned to the page about the shapeshifter as the other three gathered around him and turned on the black light.
"Oh. Right. The invisible ink. Forgot about that." admitted Young Dipper.
Adult Pacifica's mind raced back to when she found a blank page about the Jersey Devil in Adult Dipper's journal.
"Invisible ink..."
"It says here that the real weakness is in the eyes. By shining a light into them it has no choice but to temporarily revert back to its original set of eyes."
"So what?" asked Young Pacifica. "Are you going to have us, like, just go around town shining pen lights into everyone's eyes?"
Adult Dipper smirked. "I have a better idea! Remember when you and Soos went Pterodactyl hunting?"
"Cameras A, B, and C!" Young Dipper's face lit up and raced off to the desk between his and Mabel's bed.
"Pterodactyl? Like, like the dinosaur?" asked Young Pacifica. "Wow! You're a bigger loser than I thought! Dinosaur hunting is seriously stupid! I knew you were a nerd but I at least thought you were a smart nerd! Dinosaurs are extinct; basic knowledge!"
"Oh yeah?!" Young Dipper challenged. He threw something at Young Pacifica's feet, whatever it was it was sharp enough to sink into the floor. "A real Pterodactyl fang! Analyze it and weep!"
Young Pacifica pulled out the fang and looked it over. "Yeah right! This thing could be anything!"
Adult Dipper gave a sharp whistle attracting the young heiress' attention. "Oh I wouldn't be so sure about that." He opened his tuxedo coat to show his dinosaur dagger.
Young Pacifica looked down at the fang and then at Young Dipper's back. She struggled to find the right words but whatever she wanted to say was immediately forgotten about when she spotted a certain pillow.
"Wait! Is that a picture of the cashier lady downstairs on a pillow?"
Young Dipper gasped and quickly jumped to hide the pillow.
"Are those drool stains on the picture? Oh my gosh! You kiss a picture of her on a pillow! You have a DISGUSTING crush on her don't you? AHAHAHAHA!"
Her laughter was cut short as her adult self lead her out of the room by pulling on her ear.
"Ow! Ow! Ow! Masochism is never the answer you know!"
"Neither is being a little brat! I wouldn't worry though, you'll forgive yourself one day. Well... thirteen years or today depending on your point of view."
At the head of the stairs Adult Pacifica finally let go.
"You know, you really shouldn't beat yourself up so much. You could give yourself childhood trauma!"
"I wouldn't have to if you just tried to be nicer! Especially with crushes! You know how we were...er... are... whatever!"
"Yeah, we liked to carry the picture of whoever we're crushing on. It's still better than what that nerd is... wait... do you have one of YOUR Dipper?!"
Adult Pacifica was caught off guard by this sudden accusation.
"What?!" she started to sweat. "I'm too old for something like that!"
"Oh yeah right! How about some punch? Because you are super thirsty!"
"Oh please, I have my feelings for Dipper completely under control!"
Young Pacifica snatched Adult Pacifica's purse.
"Hey!"
"You might be older, but the one thing I know is that the more things change the more they stay the same. So let's see what kind of picture you have of Indiana Dick Tracy!"
"Wait! No! You don't understand..."
Adult Pacifica grabbed the purse but her 12 year old self wouldn't let go.
"I need to know what kind of picture it is! Embarrassing picture, hot picture, Bigfoot picture, I need to know where I'm going to stand!"
The tug of war lasted only a few seconds before something came flying out and landing behind Young Pacifica.
"Is that a Dipper plush doll?"
"No..."
"..."
"Yes. I made it myself... It helps me sleep at night."
Back in the room the Dippers were having an unrelated conversation.
"Did the author REALLY have six fingers? That's SO crazy! What kind of person has SIX fingers?" asked four fingers.
"Little Britches, you know why I can't tell you!"
"But... I need to know! You have all the answers and..."
"Which is exactly why I can't tell you them."
"But..."
"I know it's rough but that fire you feel, that burning curiosity, it becomes a major corner stone of who I grow up to be. So you need to find those answers on your own."
Young Dipper was about to press the issue but the Pacificas came back.
"My bright eyed little self would like to say something!"
Adult Pacifica pushed her younger self towards the 'little' Dipper.
"I'm..." Young Pacifica looked like she was about to be sick and even dry heaved for a moment. "I'm sorry, about what I said about your crush on that Ginger Trailer Trash."
Young Dipper looked at her seriously for a moment, analyzing her and her apology. He crossed his arms and sneered "Apology NOT accepted!"
"WHAT?!"
"Just because your adult self is forcing you to apologize doesn't mean you aren't still Pacifica Northwest; the meanest and overall worst girl in all of Gravity Falls!"
"Why you no good little PUNK!"
With that shout Young Pacifica threw herself at the young Pines and wrestled with him on the floor.
"Do you think we should stop this?" asked Adult Pacifica.
"Why? You know we grow out of it."
"I mean... You're not wrong..."
"For what its worth I'll apologize now. I'm sorry, I was a stupid kid back. You're so much more than a Northwest."
"You say the sweetest things!"
"I'LL KILL YOU!"
"Well, usually."
Downstairs...
Candy and Grenda had come over after hearing Mabel's call. They had her seated in the living room and were currently doing their best to help her with her recent boy-immunity.
"I'm telling you girls, this guy hit a 0 on my hunk radar! I think I'm growing out of my love for boys!"
"It's okay Mabel, as your friends we will steer you back onto the correct path." assured Candy
"We need to know how bad this is so we're going to hold up some photos of some hotties and you tell us the first thing that comes to mind!"
Grenda held up a poster of Several Times.
"Dream Boat Banaza!"
Candy held up one of Grenda's mother's inappropriate romance books.
"The more Jarrod the better!"
The Dippers and Pacificas came down the stairs, Adult Dipper only looked into the room for a moment but it was long enough for all three girls to get a look at him.
"And that stud?"
"Absolutely nothing!"
Gravity Falls (in town)...
The Dippers and Pacificas were in the middle of town square.
"Okay team, so nobody catches on to us I think it'd be a good idea for us to split up into teams of two!" Adult Dipper proposed.
"Good idea! I'll go with you and the Pacificas can... I don't know, do each other's probably fake blonde hair."
"Hey!" the Pacificas objected in unison.
"Wrong on all accounts Big Guy, I'm going with Adult Pacifica and you'll be going with your Pacifica."
"Bad idea! You can't really expect me to work with the likes of... of... of HER!"
"Of course I do. Because I do! Everyday!"
Adult Pacifica smiled. "I like spending everyday with you."
"Me too." Adult Dipper smiled back.
"Yeah?" Adult Pacifica leaned closer to him.
"Yeah." Adult Dipper leaned closer to Pacifica.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah?"
"Yea—HEY!"
The Mystery Couple find themselves being pushed away from each other by their kid versions of themselves.
"The more you flirt the farther away the shapeshifter gets!" accused Young Dipper.
"I am a FLIPPIN minor woman! And the last thing you want to do is mentally scar yourself!"
The adults let out a small chuckle.
"Fine, but I'm afraid the teams aren't going to change. We'll take the south end of town and you two will take the north. Look at it this way, you'll have to learn to work together at some point."
Omake
Young Dipper and Young Pacifica walked into town glaring at each other.
"Listen, I don't want to end up with you and you don't want to end up with me!"
"Well duh, what's your point?"
"Well here's the thing, even if our adult selves don't remember this adventure there are still things you don't forget when you grow up."
"Where are you going with this?"
"If we can make them remember this adventure then there's a chance we won't end up together and, like, create an alternate time line or whatever."
"...I don't like the idea... but I don't like the idea of hooking up with you even more. What's your idea? Break some bones?"
"Yeesh! Nothing like that! Listen, you're a loser so you've probably never been kissed by a pretty girl, right?"
"I...you... how dare... what?!"
"So I'll just be your first kiss..."
"Oh please no!"
"You'll remember it when you grow up..."
"I think I'm going to be sick!"
"Ourselves will remember it and then we won't have to end up together. You never forget your first kiss after all."
Dipper stared at her for a moment. She stared back. Then another moment passed.
And then Dipper ran off screaming.
"DIPPER! YOU COME BACK HERE AND KISS ME SO I WON'T HAVE TO GROW UP AND KISS YOU! …...wait a second..."
That's it for now. Sorry about the wait, short answer is life got in the way. It was the ending the was really lagging anyways. So tell me if you enjoyed this. I could use some enthusiasm after the hoops I've been jumping through outside this story.