Chapter 41

June 12, 1996

A couple of hours before sunset, Sookie carried Leif into Godric's room and laid with him on the bed. Godric was still dead for the day, but she knew that he'd be rising soon. She had almost dozed off again when Godric smiled and turned to face her before he opened his eyes.

"It sounded like you two had a good night."

"Yeah, I felt you out there snooping."

He laughed. "I was there to keep you safe, just in case. Pam was snooping."

She smiled back at him. "I know. I knew it was going to be fine, though." She sighed. "I'm sorry I've been so mean to you. The last eleven months have been hell, but I'm pretty much right where I want to be right now. Maybe it would have turned out better my way, maybe not. But I guess you weren't completely wrong."

He grinned at her. "You really are something else, Miss Stackhouse. I don't think you realize how special you are."

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I smell good and taste better. I know Eric enjoys it, but I don't really think it's such a plus to be the tastiest prey."

"No, Sookie, that is a very small part of what makes you special. I heard last night that Eric fell in love with you years before he became Vampire, so it can't just be that."

"I guess."

"What else, then?"

"My disability? I got called 'special' a lot because of that. It wasn't a compliment."

"What if I had another human in here with me today? A woman or a man?"

The change in subject matter threw her a little. Sookie shrugged. "I would have been really embarrassed? But you don't ever bring anyone home."

"No. And why not?"

"I kinda didn't think you were into that sort of thing any longer."

He laughed. "I guess that's one way of putting it. Why else?"

She shrugged again. "I don't know."

"I don't trust anyone enough to bring them here."

That confused her even more.

"Even though you can't be glamoured, neither one of us hesitated. I let you in the same room with us, dead for the day and completely vulnerable, not two weeks after I met you, even though I knew that you had already killed a vampire as old as I am."

"I would never hurt you or Pam. But I think that most people wouldn't, if they really knew you."

"It's one thing to think it. It's quite another to entrust your life to it, especially after living as long as I have. But I have never doubted your loyalty and honour, even though you claim to hate me more often than not. And I not only trusted you from the very beginning with my existence, I trusted you with my child's."

"I never really hated you."

He smiled at her. "I know. But you weren't even a little bit scared to pretend that you did. You dare to treat us as equals, and somehow make us see you that way as well."

"The first vampire I ever met was the guy I'd been in love with forever. He was still Eric. Why wouldn't I just see y'all as people?"

"Because we aren't. We're monsters, Sookie. Death. I've killed thousands just for sport."

She frowned. "But that's not who you are now."

"No, I have regretted it for a very long time. But I have never met another human who makes me want to be a better person, even though I'm not one."

Sookie reached over the baby and idly traced the lines on Godric's arm while she thought.

"You're a lot like that tattoo, Sookie. Somehow, you just get under our skin."

Pam stuck her head through the door. "Why wasn't I invited to this party?"

Sookie smiled at her. "Because you were still dead, Snoop. I should get back. Eric will be waking up soon."

"Well, you wouldn't want to be late for round three." Pam sat down on the edge of the bed and sniffed. "I smell that you two haven't learned your lesson about the blood."

Sookie blushed. "Yeah, like you weren't listening anyway." She got up and bent down to pick up the baby. Pam put her hand on Sookie's arm. "Leave him. I'll bring him if he needs you."

That made up for Pam's teasing a little bit. Sookie smiled, kissed Pam's cheek, and left. Pam laid down next to Leif, who was sleeping peacefully.

Godric said, "Pam, I think that renewing their bond was an important part of their reconciliation."

"I suppose. But we all know that they're going to go right back to swapping blood like they don't know any better. You always taught me that blood is sacred."

"Maybe I was wrong about that, too."

"Hmpf. What if he turns her accidentally?"

Godric smiled and stroked her hair. "So, that's where this is coming from. You know that he is too young. He wouldn't be able to turn her even if he replaced all of her blood with his. If she agrees to be turned, it will need to be by someone else. But it needs to be her decision."

Pam looked down at Leif and wondered how in the hell she felt this much guilt over wanting so desperately to leave him, a human child, an orphan. Technically, at least.

…

Sookie undressed and snuggled up against Eric and nodded off. Leif was now alert a lot of the day, and Sookie had been up all night. She was beat. She woke up when Eric wrapped his arm around her and kissed the top of her head.

"I almost thought I was dreaming, rising with you in my arms. I can hardly believe that you're real."

Instead of answering, Sookie put her hand on his chest and kissed him. Eventually, she pulled away and snuggled back against his side. "I missed you, too. So much. And I felt so guilty. I was scared to death that you were never going to speak to me again."

He tipped her chin up so that she would look at him. "You did what you had to. And you are mine, Sookie. I'm not going to throw that away. Especially when I've fucked up so many times."

She kissed him again, and reached down and stroked his dick. He moaned into her mouth. She kept up the rhythm with her hand while she scraped her teeth on one nipple and gave a sucking bite to the other. She mouthed down his abdomen, and then sucked one of his balls into her mouth.

"Fuck, Sookie."

She was so incredibly hot, eyefucking him while she sucked his cock. And she was so fucking good at it, definitely the best he'd ever had. He knew that he wouldn't last long, but it felt so good that he didn't want it to end.

"I'm going to cum." She hollowed out her cheeks as she stroked him, and he came hard in her mouth. She crawled back up the bed and kissed him, and the taste of her mouth and his cum made him hard and ready again.

He hadn't closed the bond since she'd told him to open it the night before, and he was scared that she would ask him to. He loved feeling her inside of him again. And it made him feel so much better to really know just how much she loved him and how horny she was for him and how angry she wasn't.

He kissed her and then kneeled on the bed, sitting on his heels, and put her calves over his shoulders. He pulled her ass up onto his thighs and slid home.

Sookie didn't think she had ever been this horny. Seeing the heat in his eyes and feeling whatever it was that he'd felt when she was looking at him and making him feel good had been such a huge turn on. It had felt almost like awe, and how could she not want him even more after that? She could feel what he liked best, and she could tell how good it felt, and a little bit of her still couldn't believe that she was the one who could make him feel like that. She thought that part of her would always be that sad little girl that everyone made fun of who could never possibly belong to someone like him. And she realized that she was in awe of him, too.

He was hitting her g-spot with every thrust, and he was so big and was fucking her so deep, and she didn't even really know any longer which feelings were whose. But it didn't matter because it felt so good.

"Oh my God, Eric."

"Sookie, I love you."

"Yes, baby, right there." He yelled out something in Swedish that she didn't understand, and they both came.

He put her legs down on either side of him and leaned forward between them to kiss her again, holding himself up with his hands. She put her arms around his neck and kissed him back. "Eric I love you so much."

He smiled and kissed her nose. "I love you, too."

Leif called out to her in his head just as Pam knocked on the door. Sookie pulled up the covers and Eric told Pam to come in.

Eric noticed that, even though Pam and Sookie teased and bantered, Pam was so gentle and affectionate with both her and the baby. He thought that maybe he should be jealous. They were so physical with each other! Pam was always stroking Sookie's hair or kissing her cheek or patting her hip, and Sookie seemed to always go to Pam for physical comfort when she was upset. Pam was always nearly drenched in her scent after they spent any time together. But, he knew that Godric would never allow anything to happen. And, as much as she gave him a hard time, he didn't really think that Pam would, either. And he could feel exactly how Sookie felt about Pam; she loved Pam deeply, but not like that.

He knew, probably better than anyone else except Sookie, how hard her life had been because of the telepathy. The hurt and disappointment she felt when she heard unpleasant - or downright mean - thoughts about her, especially when they were thought by people she cared about. And then, more often than not, they blamed Sookie for hearing it, even though she almost always tried so hard not to read their minds.

What a revelation this must have been for her. She could finally relax, strangely enough, surrounded by vampires who cared about her like family. No wonder she had clung to Pam and Godric, especially since Adele had hurt her so badly. And that had pissed him off more than anything, and he couldn't reconcile it with the kind woman he knew.

As miserable as he had been in Texas, he had read between the lines enough to know that Sookie had had it so much worse. And that was before he had nearly ruined both of their lives. She thought herself so weak, but she was really the strongest person he knew. No matter what happened, she pulled herself back together eventually and kept on going. Of course it affected her - how could it not? But she usually came out stronger, and somehow still thought the best of people.

Sookie sat up and took the baby from Pam. She smiled down at Leif, who was smiling back up at her. "I love you, too, handsome." She laid on her side and latched Leif on. He was hungry and got right down to business. Pam sat on the edge of the bed.

"Did he really just tell you he loved you?"

Sookie shrugged. "Not exactly. He looked at me and felt love. I think, anyway. It sure felt like it. But I'm almost positive he knows I'm reading his mind, too. So, maybe?"

Eric said, "That almost sounds like a bond."

"It's a little like that, but it's different, too. I don't feel his emotions like my own, like I do with yours. I just… I don't know. Sense them. It's a little like the difference between reading something and experiencing it yourself, I guess."

"It was definitely love. I… I gave Leif some of my blood. I'm sorry, Sookie. I know I shouldn't have."

She reached across the baby and tucked his hair behind his ear and stroked his cheek. "I knew you were going to, Eric. I gave Godric grief about it, because you really should have asked first, but I'd have told Godric not to let you going in if I'd been against it. If you'd asked, I would have said yes. You're his father, and I knew you would want to protect him. I would have worried if you hadn't. And I would have doubted your sincerity about wanting a relationship with him. But you can't bond to him forever, Eric. It wouldn't be fair."

Pam stood up and kissed Sookie's cheek. "You need to exchange blood three times to form a bond, Sookie. Giving him a drop or two every other month won't hurt him, and it's one hell of an insurance policy. Have fun, kids." She left the room.

And then it was just the three of them in the bed. And, for the very first time, they felt like a family doing family things. Eric looked at her and smiled, and she didn't know if it was because of her feelings, or because he felt it, too. But, either way, the look in his eyes told her everything she needed to know, and she stroked his face again.

Leif had fallen asleep again, and she popped her nipple from his mouth. He stayed asleep, and Eric gently picked the baby up and laid him in his crib.

"You haven't fed, Sweetie. I'm sure I can spare some blood, especially if you give me a little of yours. And Leif only nursed from one side, too. But I need to call Gran first before it gets too late. I have to let her know I won't be home again tonight."

Eric laid back with his hands laced behind his head to wait. His dick was certainly standing at attention. He felt like he had to be the luckiest vampire in the world.

…

The phone rang, and Adele got up and sat at the stool by the counter to answer it. "Hello?"

"Hey, Gran! Leif and I are going to stay over at Pam's one more night."

"Oh, that's nice, Sookie. Any big plans?"

Sookie laughed. "Nope. Just hanging out. We might watch a movie later on. But I'm tired and don't want to drive home in the dark."

"Well, then, I'm glad you're staying. But I could use a hand with a few things tomorrow afternoon, if you don't mind."

"Sure thing, Gran. We should be home in time for lunch. Love you!"

"I love you, too, Sookie."

Adele hung up the phone. Bill Compton, leaning against the counter beside her, smiled. "Very good, Mrs. Stackhouse. I couldn't have done it better myself."