Chapter 41
"And then my father said when I become Slytherin's seeker next year, he'll hire Maxime Flaunt from the Wimbourne Wasps to personally train me during the summer," Draco boasted as he held court surrounded by his usual sycophants. He'd been boasting about everything and anything for over an exceedingly long hour now.
Harry sat between Theo and Blaise on a nearby sofa and regretted many of his recent life choices as he stared ahead, barely taking in a word Draco said. Beside him, Theo, that annoying little blighter kept shooting Harry amused looks while hiding his smile behind the rim of his brightly coloured children's cocktail they were served by an antsy house-elf. Blaise also looked vaguely amused but honestly, that was how Blaise almost always looked no matter the situation. But Theo seemed to have developed sudden psychic powers because Harry could tell Theo knew exactly how much Harry disliked being 11 years old at that moment.
After Harry and Tom had returned from the wonderful day they spent at Tom's real home, they had enjoyed an early but delicious dinner in the observatory with Dorus, Theo and Barty, where they'd eaten several dishes cooked with the chickens they'd used as sacrifices during their Yule ritual. Afterwards they'd all gone separate ways to their rooms to get ready for the Malfoys' annual Yule party. In Harry's case this meant taking the antidote to the aging potion Tom had gifted him. And suddenly finding himself in his 11-year-old body again, after having enjoyed being his adult self for barely two days, was a real disappointment somehow.
Worse yet, since Harry was going to visit Sirius the next day to spend a few days with his godfather he wouldn't be able to put more of the aging potion to good use until almost the end of the Yule holidays when he'd return to Nott Manor.
If Sirius even let him return that was.
Harry sighed and sipped his own fruity cocktail which sadly lacked any alcohol. Somehow he'd envisioned attending an official Malfoy party as something a little more exciting than being stuck in a small reception room while Draco bragged about his life in excruciating detail. But as it turned out, it was tradition that during parties held in the evening children below Hogwarts age weren't even allowed to attend, and children of Hogwarts age could attend but in a separate room away from the adults. Only those Hogwarts students that were of age could join the grown-ups.
Not that Harry could really blame the adults, mind. He understood all too well that the adults wanted a chance to socialize and talk about adult subjects without a bunch of children and young teenagers running around.
This was also the reason Harry himself hadn't even received a personal invitation, because Harry wasn't personally invited.
Theodorus Nott was personally invited to the party, and since he had two children of Hogwarts age in his care at that time, he could bring them with him as long as those children understood that they were supposed to stay out of sight for pretty much the whole evening.
Harry sighed again, ignoring Theo's quiet chuckles while Draco had moved on to the topic of shoes and how his mother had taken him shopping in Prague by portkey for the very special new shoes he was currently wearing.
Since Harry could feel himself become more and more agitated while coming closer and closer to hexing Draco with some amusing animal body parts he decided the best thing he could do was tune out the room all together and think about more pleasant things.
Such as the amazing day he'd had with Tom. How welcoming Tom's home had felt. And how absolutely mind-blowing it had been to actually kiss Tom.
Harry still wasn't sure how the hell that had even happened, but somehow how it had.
Somehow Harry had put his lips on Tom's, had pushed his tongue in Tom's mouth until he'd felt Tom's tongue against his own.
They had kissed.
Really, truly kissed. The very best kiss in Harry's lives, in fact.
And yes, Tom had sort of rejected Harry, but also not really. He had merely wanted time, but he had been quite clear that he considered their future relationship inevitable and all Harry had to do was wait and it would happen eventually.
Tom cared for him, Harry realized. And he cared for Tom. Really, truly cared for him.
In fact, one could say that Harry loved Tom.
Harry's eyes widened because holy crap, that was some realization to have. As he was sitting there in Malfoy Manor, listening to Draco drone on about cufflinks, Harry knew with certainty that he loved Tom.
Harry Potter loved Tom Riddle.
That realization took his breath away, but at the same time Harry's face wanted to break out in the largest, sappiest smile ever.
So this was what it felt like, Harry mused, to be in love. This glowing cloud that absorbed you whole.
He'd known for a while now that he was attracted to Tom and even that he cared about Tom, considered him the closest friend he had.
But now he knew that his feelings had grown so much that it had become love that he felt. Harry barely managed to keep his face straight and subdue the smile that wouldn't be amiss on the face of a lovesick fool, but now he suddenly had the urge to start laughing because holy crap, Harry Potter loved Tom Riddle who was in essence Lord Voldemort and no one knew.
Dumbledore still believed Harry would one day vanquish Tom while Harry would never do such a thing. Fuck Tom, certainly, and marry Tom, maybe, hopefully, but Harry knew from this moment on that he would never, ever hurt Tom no matter what the world expected of him.
Harry basked in that glowing feeling of happiness for the rest of the evening.
It wasn't until the party came to an end and Harry found himself strolling through the opulent corridors of Malfoy Manor that unwelcome memories tried to invade his mind. Being stuck in an unfamiliar room surrounded by three dozen Hogwarts students, most of which he knew by name, had kept the memories of his previous life at bay, but now he recognized the exact corridor he'd been hauled through on his way to see Lucius, Narcissa and Bellatrix when they'd been caught by snatchers. Hermione had been tortured here and Harry could still hear her agonized screams. Pettigrew had looked so, so scared while his own silver hand choked the life out of him.
And Harry didn't even want to think about what had really happened to Luna while she'd been imprisoned in this house surrounded by depraved men.
"Harry," Theo said quietly as he walked beside Harry to the entrance hall. "You all right? You look white as a sheet."
"Fine," Harry managed to say, desperately pulling his mind back to the here and now. "Just tired. Been a long day."
Before Theo could respond they arrived in the hallway where Tom, Dorus and Barty stood waiting for them. At once the chilly thoughts that had invaded him were replaced with that welcoming glowing feeling and Harry smiled at Tom as he fell into step with him while they left the manor to walk towards the apparition point beyond the gates.
"Enjoy your evening at the metaphorical kiddie table?" Tom asked with a knowing smirk as he glanced down.
Harry sighed. "I hate you so much right now."
Tom's smirk stayed firmly in place. "Not quite the impression I got earlier today, my dear."
That glowing feeling in Harry's chest intensified until he was genuinely worried he might spontaneously combust. Was this flirting? Was Tom flirting with him? Harry hadn't a clue, but he suspected it might be the case. "Yeah, well," Harry replied with an airy wave while he was this close to accidental self-immolation. "I have it on good authority we're inevitable so I figured I might as well get things going. Gryffindors have little patience, after all."
Tom's smirk transformed into a smile that made his cheeks dimple, which what the fuck? Since when did they do that? Harry's neck objected fiercely while he stared up and up at Tom's smile in quiet disbelief. And once again Harry hated being in his 11-year-old body because Tom was so fucking tall and Harry was a tiny glowing shrimp.
And then Harry learned the very valuable lesson that being distracted by someone's smile to the point of not looking where you were going made you trip over grassy borders beside the gravel path, and he would have face-planted right then and there if Tom hadn't caught his arm and pulled him back upright before he could wipe out completely.
"Still hate you," Harry muttered, quickly resuming his walk, his cheeks now glowing for an entirely different reason than love. "So did you and Barty at least have a productive night?"
"We did, yes," Tom said, cheeks still dimpled until he schooled his features into a more familiar mask of fond amusement. "Lucius and Dorus introduced us to many influential wizards and witches, some of whom seemed interested in hiring us to work on their wards. So first contact has been made with wizarding high society and from here on out we're going to have to keep networking."
"Fascinating," Harry said, lying through his teeth.
Tom wasn't fooled, though, and he snorted quietly. "You have many talents, my dear, but politics will never be one of them."
"You're not wrong," Harry was all too happy to concede. It was one thing to make a few strategic friends at Hogwarts, something Harry didn't mind doing one bit. But the thought of having to spend the rest of his life boozing and schmoozing with people he probably couldn't even stand made him want to scream in utter despair. "Let's leave the politics to you, and I'll find something else useful to do to help us out."
"It's a deal." Tom said, but before Harry could contemplate what exactly he meant by that in terms of their potential future relationship, they reached the apparition point and Tom grabbed his elbow and popped them back to Nott Manor without any ceremony.
Harry's eleven-year-old body did not like apparition one bit and Harry swayed in place before Tom steadied him with a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"Best to call it a night," Tom said as they stood staring at each other for a few moments too long. "Your godfather expects you bright and early tomorrow morning."
"Yeah." Harry wasn't sure why he was hesitating to leave Tom's side. He was tired and it wasn't like they had anything urgent to talk about that couldn't wait, yet Harry found it incredibly hard to just walk away without some sort of gesture of affection.
So in the end Harry decided to do the thing Tom seemed to accept from him and he threw his arms around Tom's waist and hugged him. Tom chuckled quietly but still wrapped an arm around Harry's shoulder while Harry buried his face against Tom's robes. "Thanks for showing me your home today," Harry mumbled, because he felt he needed to give some sort of excuse for this spontaneous hug.
Of course, that was the moment Dorus and Theo, soon followed by Barty, popped into existence right beside them.
"Good night!" Harry all but yelled as he sprang away from Tom, who also took a step back that was a little too quick and uneven.
"Yes, sleep well, my dear." Tom offered him a nod, face giving nothing away.
Theo looked as if he wanted to ask a million questions while bursting out in laughter and Harry all but ran into the Manor to avoid his friend's obvious amusement on his behalf.
Thankfully, Harry really was exhausted and sleep came almost at once and before he knew it, Harry was showered, dressed and packed, belly full of the lovely breakfast buffet the elves had prepared. Dorus and Tom stood waiting for him by the front door.
"Have fun," Tom said with a hint of discomfort in his voice. "Don't let Black drive you crazy with his sermons against anything Slytherin. And if you need my assistance, send Kreacher. Dobby also knows to listen for a summons from you." He then handed Harry a small scroll of parchment. "If you decide to come clean with Black, make sure he signs this."
"Thanks," Harry said with a grateful smile, accepting the secrecy contract and sliding it inside his pocket. "I'll see you in a couple of days."
Dorus joined him outside to apparate him to Black Manor in Cumbria and a strange sense of anticipation and worry settled in Harry's stomach that had nothing to do with the uncomfortable way of travel.
On the one hand, Harry was genuinely looking forward to spending time with his godfather. He'd been able to spend depressingly little time with his godfather in his first life, after all. But Sirius had proven only recently that he still was susceptible to Dumbledore's lies and machinations, no matter how many seeds to the contrary Harry had planted in his mind so far.
So Harry would wait and see how Sirius was doing before he decided how much to tell the man, if he even was going to tell him anything at all.
Harry managed to stay on his feet as Dorus apparated them to the front gate of Black Manor and without pause Dorus tapped his wand against the closed iron gate to announce their arrival.
"Thanks for letting me stay with you so far," Harry said as they waited, because it couldn't hurt to be polite.
"You're very welcome," Dorus said with a grin that seemed entirely too amused. "You and Tom have chased away much of the rut I'd found myself in this year, and for that I am most grateful. You're more than welcome back and I'll come to get you three days from now."
"I appreciate that," Harry said, but before he could say more he spotted Sirius all but storming towards the gates.
"You are not welcome here!" Sirius bellowed, eyes blazing as he glared at Dorus.
Thankfully, Dorus decided to simply ignore the open hostility and ignored Sirius, nodded at Harry and apparated away.
"Was that really necessary?" Harry asked as Sirius, now visibly calmer, opened the gate with a tap of his wand.
"Yes, Harry. I won't have Death Eater scum on my property." Sirius waved Harry inside the gates.
Harry wanted to point out that at no point Dorus had actually been on Sirius' property but he realized that arguing about these things was probably futile so he kept his mouth shut.
Remus Lupin came walking up the tree-lined lane that led to the Manor at a much more sedate pace than Sirius had and Harry wasn't sure what to make of his presence. He didn't mind Lupin, not really, but at the same time he'd never been very close to the man in his previous life, either.
There had been potential for a real friendship during Harry's third year, but then Lupin had buggered off and not been in touch during Harry's fourth year, when Harry really could have used a supporting adult on his side and after that Harry had only really had contact with Lupin sporadically, mostly through Order business. Yes, Lupin and Tonks had made Harry the godfather of their son, for which Harry was grateful, but that didn't change the fact that Harry barely knew the man.
Well, perhaps this holiday Harry could spend some time actually getting to know Lupin then. One thing was for sure, though. Harry wasn't going to tell Lupin the truth, not right now at least. Not until he was sure Lupin simply wasn't going to run out again when the going got tough. Not to mention, he only had one secrecy contract, which was meant for Sirius.
"Are you all right?" Sirius looked him over top to bottom several times. "Did they hurt you?"
"No one hurt me," Harry said with a tired sigh, already done with Sirius' paranoia. "No one tried to kill me, either. Well, except maybe Draco, who tried his very best to bore me to death with his ridiculous monologues about his perfect little pureblood life during the party last night, but everyone else has been nothing but kind to me."
"Party? Last night?" Sirius widened his eyes dramatically as he stared at Harry. "You mean the Malfoys' Yule party? You were there? Harry, that's practically a Death Eater rally!"
"I really wouldn't know what it actually was, Sirius," Harry said snootily, giving his godfather a level look. "Seeing as I was stuck in a separate room with all the other children drinking rainbow coloured drinks sweet enough to make every honeybee in this world weep tiny tears of joy. The adults may have been worshipping Voldemort's rotting remains or they may have all danced naked around a pink Christmas tree, I haven't a clue, honestly."
"Merlin, Harry," Sirius said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I did not need those mental images."
"I think he's got a wonderful imagination," Lupin said as he finally managed to join them.
"Thanks, Mr Lupin!" Harry chirped, trying to act a little more like a child unless he gave the game away entirely.
"You may call me Remus."
"Sure, Remus," Harry said with a happy little smile, inwardly experiencing a small sense of shock and surprise, because Lupin sure as hell had never given Harry permission to use his first name in his previous life. Perhaps that was because Harry had first known him as a teacher? Either way, it was something that stood out as being different, but not unwelcome.
"Come on," Sirius said while gently giving Harry a small push towards the large, gothic manor. "Let's get you settled. We just got done decorating a room especially for you."
"Really?" Harry's orphan heart leaped a little at the idea of his godfather giving him his own room.
"Of course. And if you don't like the colours we can change it," Sirius quickly assured him.
Harry expected something garishly Gryffindor, but was pleasantly surprised to find a suite of rooms, with a floorplan very much like the guest room he'd occupied in Nott Manor, decorated in dark wood and with blue, green, gold and red accents.
"Hogwarts colours," Harry said happily as he stepped into the room while Sirius and Remus hovered near the door, both obviously eager to see Harry's reaction. "I love it, really."
"I'm glad." Sirius grinned as he stepped further into the room. "Moony here vetoed Gryffindor colours and I wasn't about to have a Slytherin room after we'd just done away with most of that in this house, so we settled for general Hogwarts colours."
"It's great. Thank you." Harry didn't have to act since he truly was grateful his godfather had given him his own rooms. In his previous life Sirius hadn't even gone through that trouble, instead letting Molly Weasley divvy up the rooms in Grimmauld Place, with Harry stuck rooming with Ron instead of finally having a space of his own.
"Good. It's yours, Harry." Sirius sat down in one of the armchairs in front of the fireplace and gave Harry a long look. "I know you've got a muggle family and that you also want to spend time with your friends, even if I'm not very happy with some of them," Sirius quickly held up his hand to ward off Harry's protests, "but none of that matters, Harry. I just want you to know these rooms are yours and they'll always be yours, no matter what. You're family, and while we'll probably end up disagreeing on plenty of things in the future, you'll always have a home here."
Harry swallowed, and then swallowed again. This Sirius was already about a dozen times more mature than the one in his first life had ever been and it gave Harry good hope that they could work things out between them eventually. Either way, Harry was genuinely touched Sirius had gone through this kind of trouble for him and he ducked his head. "This means a lot. Thank you."
"Sure, Harry." Sirius got up and patted Harry on his shoulder. "How about we go see about your present? It's in the family room."
Harry blinked in surprise and then followed Sirius and Remus out of his rooms and through the mansion. He'd given Sirius a large gift basket from Honeydukes like he'd given to most of his friends, which he'd ordered by owl. It was an appropriate gift from an 11-year-old. Harry hadn't sent anything to Remus, since he'd only met the man for less than five minutes in St Mungo's at that point so he assumed Remus would forgive him for his lack of gift.
And honestly, Harry hadn't even realized Sirius hadn't yet given him a gift for Yule. He'd assumed Sirius had given him Kreacher for a hot minute, but after the truth came out about that little faux pas, Harry had completely forgotten he hadn't yet received anything from his godfather. He'd received so many gifts, mostly from complete strangers, that it had utterly slipped his mind.
The manor was large and rather gloomy in places, with patches here and there that had obviously already been redecorated, Harry noticed as they walked from what was the family wing of bedrooms to the family sitting room.
"Go look under the tree," Sirius said with a huge grin as they entered a freshly decorated room with white walls, shining wooden floors and lots of colourful accents. It was a far cry from the stifling dark furniture and brown walls Harry had spotted in other rooms.
A large Christmas tree stood near one of the windows, decked out in an array of colourful ornaments, some of which weren't even attached to the branches but floated or zipped around the tree. Below the tree was a suspiciously familiar looking package.
Harry pretended not to notice what it obviously was and ripped the golden wrapping paper open to reveal a Nimbus 2001.
"Do you like it?" Sirius asked eagerly. "It's only just come out on the market, literally two weeks ago."
"It's amazing," Harry said, admiring the broom. He'd never actually flown a Nimbus 2001, since currently he owned a Nimbus 2000 and in his previous life he'd followed that up with a Firebolt, also courtesy of his godfather. "I have a Nimbus already, but not this one. I bet this one is faster."
"Yep, that's what the salesman said," Sirius agreed with a satisfied smile. Then his face fell a little and he gave Harry an almost pleading look. "Just, go easy on Gryffindor, okay?"
"Absolutely not!" Harry answered with a smug grin.
Sirius sighed dramatically and shook his head. "Fine. Want to try it out? I got one, too."
"Sure!" Harry jumped up from the floor, broom in hand. Then he noticed Remus looking rather wistfully at them both. "Would you like to try my old broom, Remus? It's in my trunk."
"Well, I wouldn't mind joining you," Remus said in a hesitant voice.
Sirius offered Remus a ridiculously fond smile. "Of course you're joining us, Moony! And do use Harry's broom, because the only alternative is a Star Sweeper that my grandmother used when she was a kid."
After a quick detour to Harry's bedroom they soon found themselves flying around the manor.
"This is an incredible broom," Remus exclaimed, holding on for dear life as the Nimbus accelerated.
Sirius laughed at him while he flew circles around Remus. Meanwhile Harry was trying out his new broom in earnest. It was a little faster than the other Nimbus, especially when taking corners, Harry concluded. He would definitely be using it in future matches, but he'd also keep his old Nimbus as a backup. It was probably a good thing Harry was no longer friends with Ron, because he could well imagine the sour look on Ron's face should a friend of his own two basically brand-new Nimbus broomsticks while Ron had none.
They spent the rest of the morning chasing each other around the manor and across the expansive grounds, which included a vast stretch of countryside comprised of hills and lakes and some woodland. By the time they stopped for lunch Harry was exhausted and entirely windswept, but he felt grateful that he'd been able to spend a few hours simply having fun with Sirius and Remus. That was, after all, an entirely new experience.
"I'm not joining you for lunch, alas," Remus said as he gave Harry back his broom. "I'm visiting my mother and aunt for Christmas dinner."
"It was nice to meet you, Remus. Have fun with your family." Harry offered Remus a bright smile and gave him a little wave, meanwhile realizing it was Christmas day. He hadn't even thought about that since this year he'd celebrated Yule with all the appropriate rituals, meals and parties.
Sirius and Harry had lunch in a small family dining room, with large windows that looked out across a walled garden full of vegetable beds, which were mostly bare, though Harry spotted a few cabbages and some kale here and there. Lunch was steak and onion pie with mash, a hearty but welcome meal after all their morning exertion.
While Harry enjoyed his meal and listened to Sirius tell a story about some Hogwarts adventure or other from his own schooldays, he decided to tell Sirius the truth that afternoon. They were alone, Remus wasn't set to be back until late that evening, and Harry didn't think he'd have this opportunity again anytime soon, since Sirius had already let it drop that Andromeda and Ted were visiting the next day. And most importantly, Harry wanted to be able to act his own age when around his godfather. Pretending to be eleven got old very quickly and the less Harry had to do it, the better. And Harry was sure Sirius, as he was now, with two fewer years spent in Azkaban and having received expert care in St Mungo's after his release, was mentally stable enough to learn the truth and accept Harry and his second chance at life.
"Is the family room secure?" Harry asked once they were done eating. "I have something important to tell you, but it is highly sensitive information."
"Yeah, there's no portraits there, and we stripped the place, so I know there are no artifacts or spells there used for spying." Sirius seemed to accept Harry's strange request without any issues and they quickly moved to the family room where Sirius' ancient house-elf Vivi served them tea and little pastries for dessert. Harry knew Sirius was still annoyed he'd lost Kreacher, and Harry did feel a little bad that Vivi now had to do most of the work by herself, old as she was, but Harry also knew Sirius was filthy rich and could easily buy a new house-elf to help him out around the manor.
"So," Sirius said after he'd served them tea. They sat on opposite sofas with a coffee table between them.
"This is going to sound crazy but all I ask is that you hear me out." Harry cleared his throat, suddenly inexplicably nervous and unsure where even to start. Well, he was a Gryffindor so he decided to simply jump right in. "I've died and come back. In my first life I lived to 18, only just, and in this life I woke up on the day I got my Hogwarts letter."
"What…what?" Sirius' eyes widened while his mouth sank open.
Harry raised a hand. "Hear me out, please. I'm not playing a prank, I'm utterly serious."
Sirius nodded dumbly, not even bothering to make a pun about his name, which told Harry that at least Sirius was willing to take the conversation, well… serious, pun or no.
"In my first life I was sorted into Gryffindor." Harry stopped talking to roll his eyes when Sirius' face lit up and he gave Harry an enormous grin. "Yeah, yeah, I'm a Gryffindor at heart, there, moving on. I became friends with two other students and together we solved many mysteries and I faced Voldemort and his followers many times, always barely making it out alive. To make a very long story a lot shorter, Voldemort came back at the end of my fourth year and I defeated him at the end of my seventh year, even though I never actually went to school during that year since we were too busy being on the run because Voldemort had taken over the country the previous summer."
"That's incredible, Harry. Where was I in this? Did you get me out of Azkaban then, too?" Sirius seemed at least willing to entertain the possibility that Harry spoke the truth without arguing, and Harry counted that as a win so far.
"You escaped Azkaban in my third year. Before that I honestly hadn't even heard of you, because no one told me anything. I was a very ignorant little bugger my first life. Anyway, you had learned that Wormtail was hiding at Hogwarts and you terrorized the castle on and off while Fudge stationed a hundred dementors around the castle, so that was a fun year for everyone." Harry gave a little shudder. God, he despised dementors. "The truth came out at the end of the year, but Wormtail got away and there was no solid evidence and Dumbledore, that fucker, refused to arrange a trial for you even though that's his fucking job, and you went on the run. You…er…didn't make it to the end of the war. Neither did Remus. Lots of people died."
Sirius blinked a few times and then leaned back in the couch with a wary sigh. "That's why you knew how to get me out of Azkaban this time then."
"Yeah, I had several plans going for getting you out. Thankfully Amelia Bones realized the truth once I pointed her in the right direction and she got everything sorted faster than I ever could have."
Glancing down at his lap, Sirius nodded and was silent for a few long moments. "And you? Did Voldemort do you in?"
"No, Dumbledore did." Harry relished the shocked look on Sirius' face when he dropped that little truth-bomb.
"Dumbledore?" Sirius could barely get the words out, as flabbergasted as he was. "Dumbledore killed you?"
"By proxy and from beyond the grave, but yeah, he did." Harry inhaled a deep breath and drained his tea. It would always be difficult to talk about this betrayal, he realized. This kind of pain would never really go away. "Voldemort had made horcruxes, containers to hold pieces of his soul. We destroyed them all, but as it turned out, a piece of Voldemort's soul had gotten stuck in me when the rebounding killing curse blew him up. According to Dumbledore, I had to let Voldemort hit me with a killing curse, which I did. By some loophole I survived and the horcrux inside me was destroyed." Harry paused for a few seconds to give Sirius time to absorb all the information.
"Dumbledore lied. The only way to get rid of the piece of Voldemort's soul in me was to destroy all of me. After the war was over, Dumbledore shared the truth with the Ministry, who arrested me, gave me a sham trial where my two best friends in the whole world testified against me, and then they chucked me through the Veil of Death."
Sirius rubbed both hands across his face. "This is…Harry, I'm so sorry…Dumbledore really orchestrated your death?"
"Yes, just like he orchestrated your illegal imprisonment, Sirius," Harry felt compelled to point out. "Dumbledore is a chess master, and while he's always had the good of the wizarding world in mind, he is not the innocent, dotty old man he likes people to think he is. Dumbledore is a ruthless general who is not afraid to sacrifice dozens of innocent people to achieve his goals."
"I'm starting to see that, yeah," Sirius whispered, eyes bright and cheeks pale. "How did you end up back here then?"
"Through some fluke, while we were hunting Voldemort's horcruxes, I'd become the Master of Death. Yeah, that's a real thing, not just a children's story," Harry said with a chuckle, seeing Sirius' incredulous look. "When I died I met Death, who offered to send me back. I took that opportunity."
"And now you're here," Sirius said with an expression full of both triumph and disbelief. "And now you can do away with Voldemort before he even comes back, right? I'll help you, Harry, just tell me what to do."
Ah, here was the thing that Harry was unsure about. Tom had warned him about telling Sirius the truth about him, but Harry wanted to at least try telling Sirius the truth. So far Sirius seemed to accept everything Harry told him and his responses were quite stable and not at all unreasonable. If he really freaked out, Harry could always obliviate him, at least about the revelations concerning Voldemort.
"Yeah, about that," Harry said with a narrow-eyed look, watching Sirius' responses like a hawk. "Creating those horcruxes had driven Voldemort utterly insane. Before making them he was a young man named Tom Riddle, and Tom, as it turns out, is a reasonable and intelligent wizard, not hell-bent on death and destruction."
"Harry," Sirius said warily, leaning forward to give Harry a questioning look. "How do you know this?"
"Because Tom and I are connected. We share a soul, Sirius." Harry exhaled a long, quivering breath. "Death put his soul back to rights and I brought Tom back with me. He remembers everything as well."
"Harry, have you gone utterly mad!" Sirius jumped up from the sofa, tea cup clattering to the floor. "Bringing back Voldemort? The man who killed your parents? Who murdered James, and Lily, and my brother Reggie and so many others, Harry, how could you do this?" Sirius sounded utterly heart-broken, his eyes glistening with unshed tears.
"Tom is not Voldemort," Harry insisted, heart constricting at seeing Sirius' extreme reaction. He desperately tried to find the words to turn this whole mess around. "Tom isn't insane, Tom never wanted to kill all those people, I swear, Sirius."
"For fuck's sake, it's that Thomas Gaunt fellow, isn't it?" Sirius' voice took on a slightly hysterical note. "You actually called him Voldemort to his face, pretending to be joking, but that was him, wasn't it? Don't you lie to me, not about this!"
"He is not Voldemort!" Harry jumped to his feet as well, sick of seeing a pissed off Sirius looming over him. "He was insane when he did all those things!"
"Who cares if he was crazy or not?" Sirius' face became more and more flushed as his voice became louder and louder. "I grew up in a dark family, and I know enough about horcruxes to know you have to kill someone to make one. So Tom murdered at least one person before he became insane as you claim."
"Myrtle's death was an accident," Harry said, but that argument sounded weak even to his own ears. He didn't know how else to defend Tom, because in truth Tom had done many things that were unforgivable, but Harry simply didn't care. Being betrayed while giving your life to save the world did that for you.
"I don't know what is true about all you just told me, Harry, but here's what I think happened. Voldemort is back, just like Dumbledore said and he got to you while you were staying with that Death Eater scum." Sirius' face became a mask of utter conviction, eyes flinty and mouth a tight line.
"Oh, for fuck's sake, nothing happened at the Notts," Harry muttered, completely done with Sirius' prejudice against his friends.
"There are many ways to influence someone's mind, Harry, ways you don't know about yet. Voldemort made you believe all this nonsense of him being insane before. Think about it! It's the perfect way to get you on his side." Sirius briefly looked up at the ceiling. "He also made you believe Dumbledore wanted to kill you. Yeah, that's something Voldemort would do, to turn you against the light." Sirius took a step around the coffee table in Harry's direction. "I'm taking you to see Dumbledore, to examine your mind, because Voldemort did a number on you without you even realizing."
"Fuck." Harry slipped his wand from his holster, ready to obliviate Sirius, but he hadn't counted on Sirius being very tall, with long arms and quick reflexes and before he even know what had happened, Sirius had reached across the table and had snatched Harry's wand from his hand. "Fuck," Harry said again, though this time it sounded a whole lot more desperate.
"Harry, we're going to help you get better, to realize the truth. Voldemort made you believe all this nonsense to turn you against us, believe me. Dumbledore can help you." Sirius reached out again and before Harry could dart out of the way Sirius grabbed his wrist and pulled him closer.
Like hell Harry was going to see Dumbledore and spill the beans to the old man about everything, but as Harry tried to pull himself free from Sirius' iron grip he quickly realized that as an eleven year old he stood no chance against the strength of a grown man and without his wand he was utterly helpless to defend himself.
Fuck, Harry needed help. Thankfully, he knew just who to call.
"Kreacher! Help me!"
With a sharp crack, Kreacher appeared, eyes shining with determination as he pointed a gnarly finger at a very surprised looking Sirius. "No good former master is not hurting the Little Master!" And with a flick of his fingers Kreacher sent Sirius flying back right into the Christmas tree, which toppled over completely, scattering ornaments everywhere.
The force of Kreacher's attack made Sirius drop Harry's wand and Harry quickly rushed towards it, picking it up and casting a stunner at a very dazed looking Sirius. Then he stood in the middle of the room, trembling while feeling defeated and lost.
"Kreacher," Harry whispered, as his throat slowly closed around a horrible lump. "Get Tom."