* ~ The Eighth Year Universe Series ~ *
PART THREE
The Eighth Year
Chapter 42: Family Planning Week
It was Monday morning, the seventh and eighth years were all cramped into McGonagall's classroom, and family planning week was beginning. McGonagall had gone over the rules one more time and had informed them that they were to remain in the classroom after they had received their child. They were not to leave until McGonagall had dismissed them. Some people were dreading it, and others were relaxed about it. Some were even excited for the chance to get extra credit; Hannah, in particular, was one of these people because she was hoping to get into an elite French healing programme after Hogwarts.
"I will begin with the couples. Will Harry Potter and Daphne Greengrass please come forward?" McGonagall asked.
They were wary about being called forward first, but Harry and Daphne walked to the front of the class all the same. Once they had reached the professor, she clicked her fingers, and a house-elf appeared.
"Kreacher!" Harry exclaimed in surprise.
"Master Harry, sir!" Kreacher squeaked. In his arms, he was holding none other than his favourite person on this planet. The blue-haired little boy he was proud to call his godson, "Teddy!"
There was some chuckling as Harry took Teddy from the house-elf. The little boy squirmed excitedly and bounced as his hair transitioned to look like Harry's mop. He grinned at the boy who was nearing his first birthday now, "Well, who's a clever little boy then," he said as he tickled him.
McGonagall smiled slightly, "As you are already a godfather, Mr Potter, I felt it made sense for you to take care of Teddy this week. His Grandmother informs me that she cannot wait to spend a week in the Caribbean with her sister," she shot an amused look at Draco, who chuckled.
The professor handed a sheet of parchment to Daphne, "This is the map to your quarters for the week, along with the password to get in. You will need it when you leave here."
"Thank you, professor," Daphne said as she and Harry sat back down in the classroom with Teddy, who was now bouncing very excitedly on Harry's lap.
"We got off pretty easy," Harry said quietly to Daphne, "Teddy is brilliant. He's the easiest baby in the world to look after."
Daphne smiled at how happy her boyfriend was to see his godson, "He is the cutest baby I've ever seen," she admitted as Teddy grabbed her finger and tried to bite it.
Harry was going to tell the boy off, but he didn't need to. Daphne gently pulled her finger out of his grasp and said, "Hey now, Teddy, fingers are not for biting," she waved her wand and conjured up a teething toy, "Now this is for biting."
Teddy narrowed his eyes at the toy for a moment but then seemed to believe it was safe because he grabbed it and immediately put it into his mouth. Harry laughed and turned his attention back to his classmates. Draco and Hermione had been called to the front of the classroom where McGonagall had opened a cupboard full of clay models of babies, which were pretty creepy. She placed one model on the desk and said, "Both of you must prick your finger and let a drop of blood fall onto the model. It will then take on your personality traits and looks and become a combination of you both."
"That's freaky," Neville whispered in Harry's ear, "Like in that creepy movie you showed me with robots taking over the world."
"It is pretty creepy," Harry agreed in amusement.
"Wow," Hermione said in awe as she pricked her finger with one of the tiny needles provided, "That's very advanced magic," she said as her drop of blood fell onto the model.
"And very dangerous, Miss Granger. Everything that we are using for this class has been developed in the Department of Mysteries," McGonagall told Hermione as Draco's drop of blood fell onto the model. Instantly it began to transform, it grew blonde curly hair, and its legs and arms grew. Its body began to move, and it screwed its face up then opened its eyes which were the same hazel brown shade as Hermione's.
"Woah," Draco and Hermione said in unison, that was indeed fantastic magic. McGonagall handed the baby, who was dressed in a pink sleepsuit, to Hermione, "She is six months old, and you may name her."
Draco was handed the map and password, and they took their seats next to their friends. Neville whispered, "This is definitely like something out of a horror film."
"Oh hush, she's cute," Hermione said, "And she does look like us."
"Which is kind of weird and creepy," Draco admitted as he looked at the child. It did have his nose, "I suppose we have to come up with a name for it."
"It?" Hermione asked with a raised eyebrow, "She may not be real, but she's still a girl. What about Darcy?"
"Yeah, okay," Draco said simply.
"My first doll was called Darcy," Hermione said thoughtfully.
Harry snorted, "That's why this is freaking me out so much. Once this is all over, I'm going to show you a movie called 'Chuckie', and you'll get where I'm coming from."
Hermione rolled her eyes as Sadie and Theo walked to the front of the class to receive their child. They went through the same process and ended up with a 5-month old boy with Theo's black hair and Sadie's blue eyes.
They joined their friends at the table, where Theo eyed the fake child suspiciously.
"Is anyone else finding this incredibly weird?" Theo whispered.
"Yes," Harry, Daphne, Draco and Neville replied.
Hermione rolled her eyes at Sadie, "No. It's just a project. They aren't going to kill us in our sleep; this isn't a Muggle horror movie."
"No, but it is Hogwarts," Neville pointed out, "I fail to see the difference sometimes."
Sadie shook her head, "They're just innocent little fake babies. What should we name him anyway, Theo?"
"I don't know," Theo floundered, "Andrew?"
Sadie frowned, "I actually like Andrew."
"It was the first thing that popped into my head," Theo muttered to Neville, who snickered.
The other couples were given babies before the pairing of the singles. This meant that Blaise and Ginny were given a dark-skinned baby girl with bushy hair and brown eyes. They joined the little group, and Ginny, who was holding the girl, muttered, "Okay, is it just me or is this bloody freaky?"
"Not just you," The majority of the group chorused.
"What do we name it?" Ginny asked as she looked at the fake baby.
"Sara?" Blaise shrugged, "That's what my first cat was called."
"This just got even weirder, but alright," Ginny said in amusement.
Harry snorted and was very grateful that he just had to look after Teddy for the week. These freaky fake doll human things were creeping him out. After that, there were no couples which meant it was time for the singles to get paired up, and Neville found himself dreading being paired with Hannah or Susan.
Terry Boot was paired with Luna, and they ended up with a 6-month old which got named Alexander. Ginny's ex-boyfriend Michael Corner got paired with Annie, which was slightly awkward considering that he was best friends with Terry, her ex-boyfriend. They ended up with a 9-month old baby girl with tanned skin, dark hair and dark eyes who was named Annabelle.
Ernie was paired with Meghan, a match that probably wouldn't go down very well because they had never exactly been the best of friends. They got a blonde-haired, blue-eyed baby boy who was named Thomas.
After this, Hannah was paired with Justin, and Neville breathed a sigh of relief. However, he couldn't help the frown that knitted itself onto his face when he saw Hannah walking away from the desk with a little girl with mousy brown hair and blue eyes. Neville's friends didn't miss the look on his face, and neither did Susan as hurt burned in her eyes. They called the fake baby Olivia, and Neville tore his eyes away with another half-hearted comment about how creepy this all was.
When Zacharias Smith and Sally Smith were paired together, there was some sniggering. They weren't related despite their surname, but they were both disliked individuals. Ever since all of the drama that had kicked off around Sally, she had lost many friends, her best friend Annie included. Neither of them looked particularly happy as they were given a blonde-haired, hazel-eyed boy who they reluctantly named Jackson.
Mandy Brocklehurst was then paired with her on-off boyfriend, Maxwell Harper. The pair ended up with a baby boy with brown hair and blue eyes who was named Danny. Only a few people were left now, and Neville was getting nervous about being paired with Susan as Gabrielle Delacour ended up paired with the seventh year Hufflepuff Mason Rockwell. Their fake child was also a boy with blonde hair and brown eyes. He was hastily named David because it was the only thing that Mason could think of on short notice.
The only people without babies now were Neville, Anthony Goldstein, Lilly and Susan. Neville tried not to look too awkward or nervous as Susan glanced at him, but he did breathe a sigh of relief when McGonagall called Anthony and Susan forward. He just hoped that Susan hadn't noticed because he didn't want to hurt her feelings, but things had already gotten awkward between them, and he didn't want to compromise their friendship further with weird feelings about fake babies this week. Anthony and Susan were given a cute baby girl with red hair and blue eyes who looked remarkably like Susan; they sat down in front of the main group and named the girl Sophia.
Finally, Neville and Lilly were called forward, and Neville hoped it wouldn't be too weird. He and Lilly were friends, but living together and raising a fake creepy doll baby would test any friendship. They pricked their fingers as the others had done, and their doll transformed into a baby. Neville made a face at the weirdness of it all, but when it was finished, it did look like a combination of Lilly and himself. The baby girl had Neville's mousy brown hair and Lilly's bright blue eyes.
"This is officially weird," Lilly muttered as she was handed the baby and Neville was handed the map to their quarters for the week.
"It's weird," Neville agreed as they joined their friends, "These things are going to take over the bloody school."
"It's all a bit too 'Chuckie' for my liking," Lilly said, and Harry nodded his agreement.
"You guys need to show me that film," Neville said as he glanced between them.
"Not until this week is over," Lilly said as she made a face at the baby, "Otherwise, you'll sleep with one eye open all week, and you'll be terrified of babies by the end of it."
"Fair enough," Neville said in amusement, "We're going to have to think up a name for it, aren't we?"
"Yep," Lilly said, "I was gonna suggest Chuckie but let's not tempt fate."
Harry snorted, "Don't call it Charlotte, Alice or Emily either then. In all the horror films, the creepy dead child is called one of those three names."
"Good point," Lilly realised, "Like nine times out of ten, the creepy child is called Alice."
Neville looked oblivious, "So what are we calling it then?"
"I don't know," Lilly said, "How about Aria?"
"Aria?" Neville asked in amusement, "It's pretty cool but quite unusual."
Lilly shrugged, "It's a character in a book series I like," she said offhandedly.
"Fair enough," Neville said, "The creepy living doll has been named Aria."
Lilly snorted in amusement, and McGonagall called the entire class to order, "You are now excused to go to your quarters and settle in. This morning, you can be absent from your first-period class, but you must drop your child off at the daycare centre before your second-period class. Bring the child back alive to pass; the happier the child is, the better your grade. Any questions?"
There didn't appear to be any, so McGonagall let the seventh and eighth years go. Harry shot the others an amused look, "Well, it's going to be an interesting week," he said.
From the looks on their faces, they were clearly all thinking the same thing.
MONDAY - DAY 1
"Are we supposed to sleep in the same bed?" Lilly asked in disbelief as they explored their quarters properly that evening.
"Looks like it," Neville said matter of factly as he walked backwards and forwards with Aria to keep her asleep.
"Isn't the whole point to make sure we don't sleep together and have children?" Lilly joked as she fell back onto the bed, "I don't even get why McGonagall is making us do this."
"It's not her; it's the Ministry. They are trying to prevent another generation of Neville Longbottoms and Harry Potters," Neville shrugged.
Lilly frowned up at him, "What do you mean?"
"My parents were 19 when they got married, and Harry's were 18," Neville replied, "They were all 20 years old when Harry and I were born. The Ministry is trying to make sure we don't all get out of school and get married too quickly."
"Why do the Ministry care how quickly people get married and spawn little puking things?" Lilly asked with a raised eyebrow.
Neville chuckled, "Well, they care because of Kingsley and those who are desperately trying to push the new reforms through. They want new blood in the Ministry. They don't want women sitting at home with babies. They want them in the Ministry, pushing forward change."
"That does make sense," Lilly said thoughtfully, "And I suppose it's useful to teach us how big a commitment a baby can be, or even a relationship."
"Exactly," Neville said as he put the baby down in the other room. He walked back into the main bedroom and continued, "And look at Hannah and me. If we had rushed into marriage after the war and I had discovered that nasty side of her, then it would have been too late. You've got to be sure of how you feel about someone before you have a baby with them because you will definitely see each other at your worst when you're both sleep-deprived and stressed."
"That makes a lot of sense," Lilly said thoughtfully, "We all grew up quickly because of the war. But for a lot of us, we grew up in terms of magic and spells. We're more advanced than other people our age in that way...but not necessarily emotionally."
"Exactly," Neville said as he sat down on the edge of the bed.
"When did you go and get wiser than me, huh?" Lilly asked as she surveyed him.
"I don't know, at some point during the war," Neville laughed.
"Oh yes, I forgot about that little revolution that you led," Lilly said. She grinned over at him, "General Longbottom reporting for duty, huh?"
"Shut up," He laughed as he shot her a grin.
"Silence."
"He doesn't cry," Harry grinned as he glanced over at his girlfriend.
"This isn't the best way to teach us about the consequences of having children," Daphne laughed, "Giving us a perfect one."
"Well, I'm the boy-who-lived, and you are amazing, so we will have perfect children," Harry joked.
Daphne laughed and rolled onto her stomach in their bed, "What makes you think we'll last that long? Look at Neville and Hannah."
"Yeah, they broke up," Harry agreed, "But that doesn't mean that we will. I've seen the worst parts of you, and you've seen the worst parts of me. We can handle them; Neville and Hannah couldn't, which meant that they weren't right for each other."
"And you're so sure that we are?" Daphne asked with a slight smile.
"I'm 100% sure," Harry said as he leant down to kiss her lips gently, "I can picture our life together. If you say you can't close your eyes and see yourself walking towards me in a wedding dress or holding a baby with a mess of black hair, you're lying."
Daphne smiled sheepishly at him, "Alright, you're right. I can picture our life together, but unexpected things can happen, Harry."
"And we'll get through every unexpected thing together," Harry said simply and confidently.
Daphne smiled broadly at him, "I love you."
"I love you too," Harry said softly as he reached over to kiss her properly. She leant in and deepened the kiss. It had barely lasted for a couple of minutes when a shout from the room next door forced them apart.
"Perfect child, huh?" Daphne asked in amusement as she pushed herself out of bed.
"Almost perfect," Harry yawned, "He'll be wanting his bottle. He only gets one at night these days. Bring him through here, and we'll feed him."
"Alright," Daphne said as Harry's yawn caught on.
TUESDAY - DAY 2
"I come bearing good news!"
The Great Hall was much louder than usual that morning, with all the children crying and shouting. Draco, Hermione, Harry and Daphne were the most at ease as they sat at the table and talked over the noise as Darcy quite happily watched Teddy changing his hair colour every 5 seconds.
"What's that?" Draco asked as he shovelled down bacon and eggs.
"Well, apart from the fact that this family planning thing is ridiculously easy," Harry said, which got chuckles from the others, "Melody was finally let out of the hospital wing today. She's been moved to St. Mungos, where she can be more comfortable during the testing period. McGonagall said she'll officially be joining us next Monday."
"That's great!" Hermione piped up.
Daphne nodded happily as she kept a close eye on the two babies, "Yeah, I bet she can't wait to get back to a relatively normal life."
"It's brilliant," Harry agreed as he too started to eat almost as hungrily as Draco. Although he hadn't had quite as little sleep as Draco had, he had been working through the night obsessing over his project again. They hadn't made it to the manor like they had planned because of Dean and Tracey's deaths, and now this whole family planning thing had gotten in the way of their plans too.
The family planning thing, for Harry anyway, wasn't as hard as it had seemed, but maybe he and Daphne were just good at it. Teddy was now eleven months old. He was crawling, walking by holding onto surfaces, and saying a lot of words now. He could also pretty much feed himself, so he fed himself his own sandwich for breakfast and Harry and Daphne then dropped him off at the daycare centre. They attended all of their classes and then picked Teddy up, had dinner in the Great Hall and went 'home'.
After that, things got complicated as Harry had Quidditch practice. He came into the living room, wearing his scarlet training gear, and he grinned when he saw Daphne on the floor with Teddy, who was changing his hair colour to anything she held up to him.
"You have no idea how cute you are with him," Harry remarked as he kissed Daphne on the cheek, "Are you sure you'll be okay?"
Daphne smiled, "Oh yeah, me and Teddy will be fine. Don't worry, just have fun at practice!" she called, and she waved to Harry as he left the room.
"Bye Hawwy!" Teddy called, and the last thing Harry heard was Daphne saying, "Aww! How clever are you, Teddy!"
Two hours later, after the most awful practice ever because almost all of the seventh and eighth years on the team were exhausted due to the family planning project, Harry dragged himself into the living room where he saw Daphne lying asleep on the couch. He smiled and woke her up; she was drowsy at first, and then she looked around with a frown.
"Harry! Teddy...he was sleeping...but I must have...and oh for Salazar's sake! He's gone!" Daphne was panicking as she looked around the room.
Harry only smiled, "Daphne, don't worry," he said calmly.
"Harry!" Daphne shrieked, "Your godson is missing, shouldn't you be more worried about-' she stopped speaking when Harry got on his knees and started crawling around the living room, "What the hell are you doing?"
"You'll see," Harry said simply as he crawled into the corner of the room and grasped something invisible that squirmed and giggled. Daphne sighed in relief from behind him as he pulled his invisibility cloak off of his godson.
"Teddy, what did I tell you about playing with Uncle Harry's invisibility cloak?" Harry chastised the boy but not too badly. He couldn't get angry with the little boy.
Teddy only giggled, "Daddy!" he shouted as he pointed at Harry, making Daphne laugh from the couch.
"No," Harry corrected the boy, "Harry."
"Daddy!" Teddy shouted again.
Harry tried again to correct him, "No, Harry."
"DADDY!" Teddy shouted on a louder, final note.
From behind him, Daphne said, "I don't think you're going to win this one."
Harry laughed, "I think you're probably right."
WEDNESDAY - DAY 3
Draco and Hermione had been finding this whole baby thing pretty easy. Darcy slept at night, ate all of her meals, giggled and was cute and rarely cried. It helped that Draco was the baby whisperer, of course, which amused Hermione to no end.
When Darcy had been put to bed that evening, Hermione found Draco pacing the living room anxiously. She frowned and put her book down, "What's going on?"
"What if we can never have this?" Draco asked her quickly, "What if we can't have this life, Hermione? Babies...or a family...what if we can't have it because of me?"
Hermione sighed, "Draco, I know that your project is freaking you out, but you've got to relax. Yes, purebloods have fewer children, but you don't have a case study of a pureblood and a muggle-born, do you?"
"Yes," Draco said irritably, "I do, and I haven't told you about it because the prognosis isn't good, Hermione!"
Hermione's frown deepened, "What have you been keeping from me, Draco?"
"Andromeda," Draco sighed, "My Aunt Dromeda...she married a Muggle-born."
"And they had a child," Hermione said, "They had Tonks. So what is the problem?"
"The problem is that they didn't just have my cousin Dora," Draco said quietly, "My Aunt Dromeda is from the Black family. They are the most inbred of all of the pureblood families, and she suffered because of that even though she married a Muggle-born."
"What do you mean she suffered?" Hermione asked quietly; she had paled slightly.
"She had three miscarriages before she had Dora," Draco said as he stared at the floor, "And two stillbirths, all because of deformations caused by the inbreeding in her family. I am a Black as much as I am a Malfoy, Hermione. How can I do that to you? How can I put you through that?"
Hermione sat down weakly on the bed, "You don't know that it will happen to us, Draco. Andromeda was the one carrying the children, and she was the one from the inbred family. It might be different if the Muggle-born is the one carrying the children."
"Might being the keyword," Draco said quietly.
"We can't let this ruin us, Draco," Hermione said as she glanced up at him, "We can't let our worries for the future ruin our present. All of this is a 'maybe' or a 'what if?', none of it could happen or all of it could."
"But you want a family, Hermione," Draco said quietly, "And you deserve one. You deserve a simple, happy family. I can't guarantee that I can give it to you, and I'm starting to feel like letting you go might be the best thing for you."
"No," Hermione said. She shook her head and met his grey eyes, "Because I don't want to be let go, Draco. I want a family, yes, but I want you more. I don't want to bother starting a family unless it's with you."
"But-"
"I know the risks," Hermione said simply, "I knew about them before you told me. I've always known about the problems that occur during pregnancy because of pureblood inbreeding. It doesn't change the way that I feel."
"Well, it changes the way I feel," Draco said quietly, "Because I don't know how I can put you through pain like that and not let the guilt eat me up."
"Draco," Hermione said softly, "The future is the future. Just focus on the present, please?"
Draco sighed but nodded, "I promise that I'll try," he said as he crossed the room and sat down next to her on the bed.
Hermione wrapped her arms around him and sighed into his embrace, "Then, for now, that's enough," she whispered gently.
THURSDAY - DAY 4
Lilly had looked after Aria for the last few nights after getting over her initial grossness at changing nappies and the like. As a result, she handed the baby over to Neville on day four so she could go and grab a few more hours of sleep.
Neville had needed to do some important Herbology work down in the greenhouse, so he was resigned to having to take Aria with him. At first, it had been fine, but then she had started crawling around on the bench, and after the fourth time Neville had to catch her from falling, he decided to put her in one of the pots to stop her from falling off. He gave her a toy, and she quite happily sat there as he worked away.
"Neville, did you put the baby in a plant pot?"
Neville jumped and looked up at Lilly, "Uh...maybe."
Lilly raised an eyebrow at him, "She's in a plant pot, Neville."
Neville nodded, "Yes...she is. She kept crawling off of the bench, so I figured she'd be safer in there!"
"How many times did she fall off the bench?" Lilly asked in amusement.
"About three times," Neville admitted sheepishly.
"Oh my lord," Lilly said as she shook her head, "We're totally failing this project."
"Sorry," Neville said genuinely,
There was a giggle, and at that point, Neville and Lilly both realised that Aria wasn't in the pot anymore. She was being lifted and thrown around by the Venomous Tentacula, and apparently, she was finding it great fun.
"Oh no," Neville mumbled, "Audrey, put the baby down!"
"Audrey?" Lilly asked in disbelief, "You named the plant Audrey?"
"No," Neville said quickly, "Sprout did, it's from-"
"A musical about a man-eating plant," Lilly snorted, "Yes, I'm aware of it."
"Audrey, can I please have the baby back?" Neville asked.
Instantly the plant dropped the baby into Neville's arms, and Lilly took her from him with a shake of her head, "Honestly, Nev, it's a good thing you and me aren't together. Between this and me nearly dropping her down the grand staircase yesterday, I can only conclude that we would be terrible parents."
Neville laughed, "Come on; we wouldn't be that bad," he joked.
Lilly laughed with him as they stepped out of the greenhouse into the chilly air, "You know Neville, people go on about you being this big, impressive war hero these days, but I don't think you've changed a bit. You're still that guy who fumbles around and gets so lost in his work he loses track of things, like a baby, for example."
Neville blushed slightly, but he was smiling too because Lilly proved to him that not all girls were Hannah and Susan. Not all girls thought he had changed, and that was a sentiment that meant a lot to him at the moment, "I didn't lose track of her. I just needed to get work done, and I thought she would be safer in the plant pot."
"You were so busy talking to me that you failed to notice that the venomous tentacula had picked her up," Lilly grinned, "But then again, you also managed to sweet-talk it into giving her back, which was very impressive, by the way."
"Well, thank you," Neville grinned, "It's one of my many hidden talents, sweet-talking venomous tentaculi."
"Roll up, roll up!" Lilly joked, "Everyone roll up to see the amazing Neville Longbottom and his infamous plant-talking abilities!"
Neville looked at her in amusement, "What on earth are you doing, Lil?"
"The circus," Lilly said with a frown, "That's what they say at the circus."
"The circus?"
"You've never been to the circus?" Lilly asked in disbelief, "Oh dear god, Nev! You are missing so much; there are tigers and lions and elephants! Oh, and trapeze artists...I have to take you to the circus; I'm going this Easter."
"Are you asking me out on a date?" Neville asked in surprise.
"No," Lilly scoffed, "I'm telling you that you are coming to the circus with me so I can educate you in all things weird, wonderful and fantastic like fortune tellers and clowns. Oh, it's brilliant, Neville, you'll love it!"
Neville smiled broadly at her, "I can't wait," he said honestly.
FRIDAY - DAY 5
Everyone else was taking family planning week somewhat seriously, but as far as Theo was concerned, the baby wasn't real, and it was just a class. He had failed other classes, so he didn't mind failing this one. On Friday, Sadie said she trusted him with the baby, and Theo scoffed as she headed out with Hannah and left Theo thinking about the many ways he could kill the fake baby and fail the class.
First, he realised that he could say what he wanted to the baby, and as long as he said it in a friendly way, the baby would smile and giggle, so he had spent Friday morning freaking Sadie out by showing her this new skill.
He sat cross-legged on the floor with the 'baby' talking to him in a sweet baby voice, "I'm going to kill you, Andrew, I'm gonna kill you," he said to which the boy giggled and clapped his hands.
Sadie stared at Theo in shock and horror; her mouth formed a perfect 'o'. She shook her head in disbelief, "Sometimes I wonder how I ended up dating you," she said simply as she put her jacket on.
"You're still leaving it with me, after that? Seriously?" Theo asked in shock. He'd been hoping to scare her enough to let him get the day off and not have to watch the baby.
"Yep," Sadie said simply as she walked towards the door, "If you do kill the baby and I hope you don't, it just means we don't get the extra credit. You're the one who needs it, though, not me. Bye, Theo!" she said with a smirk as she left the room. It was times like this that Theo could grin and say his girlfriend was definitely Slytherin material.
After she left, Theo tried to drop the baby out of the window, but Draco caught him doing it and grabbed the baby before it fell. He got a smack around the head, but that didn't stop him from trying again by accidentally dropping the baby into the lake. Unfortunately, the giant squid spat him back out. Then he tried to use the baby for Quidditch practice, but Harry disapproved, and after that, he eventually gave up.
Draco and Harry had both agreed that he was a sadistic git who shouldn't have kids, but Theo only scoffed and said, "If this was actually my kid, I wouldn't do this, but it's just some freaky piece of clay that's alive and shit. That's some spooky stuff."
"When you put it like that...you have a point..." Draco admitted.
Harry barked out a laugh, "Well, as mine is alive and living, I disagree...and Theo, please stay away from my godson."
SATURDAY - DAY 6
Things weren't going smoothly for Susan, Anthony and Sophia. As Susan and Anthony were good friends, they got through okay, mainly because Susan did everything because she wanted the extra credit. It was fine until Susan had to go to Quidditch practice on Saturday.
"Ant, come on! I'll be gone for an hour and a half, two hours at the most. She'll be asleep all of the time; you probably won't even have to change her nappy!" Susan begged. She was already in her kit, ready to go.
"Can't you just skip this practice?" Anthony asked irritably, and Susan was about to reply when the door opened, and Annie walked in, smiling, "Hey Suse. I thought I'd help Ant babysit while you're at practice."
Susan smiled at Annie and hugged her, "Ugh, thank you, Annie! You are a lifesaver," she kissed the girl on the cheek, "I'll be back soon!"
"See ya," Annie waved as Susan darted out of their quarters. She went to practice, and she played well, then on her way back, she bumped into Neville. It was the first time they had seen each other alone since all that had happened, and it was even more awkward considering he was holding a baby.
"Hey," Susan said weakly, "Having fun?"
"Not particularly," Neville yawned, "Lil thinks we'd be terrible parents because I let the venomous tentacula kidnap the baby, and she nearly dropped it down the grand staircase."
"Wow, and I thought Anthony was bad for not looking after it for a few hours while I went to Quidditch practice," Susan chuckled.
"I'm sorry about the way I said what I said," Neville said out of the blue, "And I know we're pretending that things are fine, but they aren't. I shouldn't have been so horrible to you, but I did mean what I said."
"I know," Susan said quietly as she tore her eyes away from his.
"You're one of my best friends, Susie," Neville said quietly. He had used his childhood nickname for her that he hadn't used for years. Her eyes snapped up to meet his, and Neville smiled slightly, "I don't want to lose that."
"I know," Susan said, "I understand Neville."
"But that doesn't make it hurt any less," Neville said with a nod, "I get that."
"We'll get back to normal," Susan said with a nod.
"I know we will," Neville said, "I have faith in our friendship."
"So do I," Susan said with a weak, almost pained smile as Neville walked away.
SUNDAY - DAY 7
As the week drew to its end, the 'gang' ended up in Daphne and Harry's 'quarters' for a catch-up.
"Have you been enjoying it?" Harry asked the others.
Neville frowned, "I like the whole aspect of having something to look after it, and it's cute and all. But it's not real, you know?"
"You like having something to look after?" Lilly asked in amusement, "Did you tell Harry about how you let the venomous tentacula kidnap her and that you put her in a plant pot?"
Harry laughed so loudly he startled Teddy in the next room, "No, he didn't tell me that, Lil. You let the venomous tentacula kidnap your baby?"
"Fake baby," Neville corrected, "I mean, if she was my real baby, I wouldn't put her in a plant pot or try and feed her to Audrey."
"That's the name of the venomous tentacula apparently," Lilly said through her laughter.
"So Sprout is a fan of "Little Shop of Horrors" then," Hermione grinned.
Harry looked clueless, "What?"
"You have never seen "Little Shop of Horrors"?" Hermione asked in disbelief, "Oh my gosh, I loved that movie as a kid! It was about a giant plant that fed on blood, so its owner fed it people."
"Ooh, so it's a horror?" Harry asked eagerly, "We can watch it after we watch "Chuckie" in the Room of Requirement!"
"It's not a horror," Hermione laughed, "It's a musical."
Neville laughed out loud, "That's settled then. We're watching it after "Chuckie". Hey Hermione, have you been to a circus?"
"Yeah," Hermione said in amusement, "Haven't you?"
"Nope," Neville said, "Lilly thinks it's shocking that I haven't. She's taking me to see a circus at Easter. How cool is that?"
Harry raised an eyebrow at them, "Like on a date?"
Lilly rolled her eyes, "No, why does everyone think it's a date? I'm just introducing Neville to the circus. I mean, who hasn't been to the circus?"
"The last time you introduced me to something, it was a boyband," Neville snorted.
"And you loved it. You still hum along to 'Picture of Me' in the greenhouse," Lilly cut in.
"Shut up," Neville snorted, "I do not."
"You bloody well do," Lilly grinned.
Harry chuckled in amusement, "If it makes you feel any better, Nev, I've never been to a circus either. But don't worry, I won't crash your date. I have no desire to go to a circus; clowns freak me out ever since Dudley forced me to watch "It" when I was like ten."
"It's not a date, Harry," Neville said irritably, "I literally just broke up with my girlfriend. Lil and I are just friends."
"Friends who have a shared interest in really cool things, like circuses," Lilly added in amusement.
Hermione chuckled, "And boybands."
"I hate you for telling them all that," Neville said, but he was smiling as he glared at Lilly.
Hermione smiled, "Well, I'll tell you one thing. Draco and I have been finding this week easy."
"Yep," Draco said with a slight smile. Everyone had noticed that Draco had been kind of off all week, but those who knew him best knew it was because of his potions essay.
"Maybe we're just going to have perfect children," Hermione said with a pointed look at her boyfriend.
Daphne laughed, "If our children are anything like Teddy, I'll be happy," she joked.
Harry grinned in amusement, "Our children?"
Daphne rolled her eyes, "I meant metaphorically, Harry, but you are the most serious boyfriend that I've ever had."
"Nah, Theo's more like Sirius than me," Harry joked, which caused a groan to go around the room at how truly awful the joke was.
"It's definitely been an eye-opener, though," Sadie yawned as she stretched in her chair, "Theo hasn't been much use, though."
There were some chuckles, "Yeah, I caught him trying to kill the baby," Draco said with a roll of his eyes.
"So did I," Harry said, "He was trying to use it as a Quaffle."
Sadie shook her head, "I've given up trying to stop him killing the baby. He thinks it's funny. He assures me he won't do it to our real baby if we have one."
"That's not really that assuring," Lilly joked as she and the others laughed.
"I know," Sadie chuckled. She was exasperated at her boyfriend's behaviour. The others laughed, as much as some of them had enjoyed the week they were looking forward to having their normal lives back when it ended the following evening.
MONDAY – DAY 8
When the final day came, it was with shock that most of the couples found themselves at least a little bit upset at the prospect of losing their 'children'. The way it worked was that each pair had a set time to meet McGonagall, and the 'child' would be turned back into the clay model. Once it was in clay form, any bruises or injuries would be seen clearly, and its 'mental' state would be assessed. Classes were suspended for the seventh and eighth years that day, and most couples came out of the room crying.
Lilly and Neville were practical when they handed over the baby; it had really freaked Neville out. The others were okay when they said goodbye, and everybody passed with an E or an O. It hadn't been a challenging class after all. Like McGonagall had said, there was one exception to every rule, of course, and that was Theo who got a 'T' on the grounds of 'trying to kill the child, several times.' Draco and Hermione came out of the room with an optimistic viewpoint, however.
Hermione slipped her hand into his, "I want a life with you, Draco, and I know that you want a life with me too. That is why we're going to get to work at Potter Manor as soon as possible to find out what causes this infertility problem."
Draco smiled at her and gripped her hand tightly, "Thank you for taking this seriously."
"Well, we have the time and resources to look into it," Hermione said softly, "So we can at least try."
"All the same," Draco said as he kissed her, "Thank you."
As they were first to be given their 'child' who was, in fact, Teddy, Daphne and Harry were last to hand him back. When they made their way to McGonagall's office, they found Andromeda drinking tea and eating biscuits with the Headmistress.
"Hello, Teddy," Andromeda smiled as she took Teddy from Harry's arms.
Teddy shouted, "Gramma!" loudly.
Andromeda chuckled, "I hear he enjoyed his week here."
"I hope so," Harry said, "He certainly seemed to. He and Daphne got on brilliantly."
"I knew that he would warm to you," Andromeda said with a fond smile, "He's not scared of new people at all. He's very outgoing, as I'm sure you noticed."
Daphne chuckled, "Yes, I had noticed," she agreed.
"Well, we had better be getting home," Andromeda said as she set her teacup down, "Thank you for the tea Minerva."
"Not a problem Andromeda," McGonagall said. It was as if she was talking to an old friend.
Andromeda smiled at Harry, "I'm sure you have heard by now that Narcissa has taken it upon herself to invite Draco and Hermione, along with her parents, to the Alps at Easter."
"Yeah, we had heard," Harry said in amusement, "Will you be going?"
"No," Andromeda said with a shake of her head, "I had thought about giving you Teddy for the week, but then this came up. So I wondered if you two would like to spend Easter weekend with Teddy and me at the cottage down in Cornwall?"
Harry glanced at Daphne, who gave him a slight nod. He smiled back at Andromeda, "We would love to," he said.
"Fantastic," Andromeda smiled as she kissed Harry on both cheeks and hugged Daphne, "I will look forward to it."
"So will we," Harry said honestly as they smiled down at Teddy.
"Say goodbye, Teddy," Andromeda said as she tickled the boy.
Teddy waved a chubby little hand at them both, "Bye Hawwy!" he shouted, "Bye Daffee!"
Teddy had taken to calling her Deedee all week so eventually getting something close to her name out of the boy brought a lump to Daphne's throat.
"Daphne, are you crying?" Harry asked in surprise.
Daphne hastily wiped her eyes and shook her head, "No, I'm just going to miss Teddy."
"Oh, don't be silly," Andromeda said kindly, "You can visit as often as you like, and we will all see each other at Easter."
"I'm already looking forward to it," Daphne said with a genuine smile, "Bye, Teddy!"
Andromeda smiled at them as Harry kissed Teddy on the top of the head to say goodbye. With that, she left the office, and Harry and Daphne turned to McGonagall to receive their grades.
McGonagall smiled, "You will both be pleased to know that you are top of the class. I have awarded you both an O+. Everyone else who performed well did so knowing that their child was a dummy, but you had a real child, and you were still more than up to the task. Well done, you make a stronger partnership than I had imagined."
Daphne and Harry shared a grin, "Thank you, Professor," Harry said happily, and with that, the couple left the office in a very good mood.
"We're top of the class," Harry said smugly.
Daphne grinned, "Bet that's a new feeling for you," she teased.
"Oi! I was top in DADA, I'll have you know," Harry defended himself.
Daphne laughed and kissed him, "I was only kidding," she said as she glanced around to make sure that the corridor was empty, "But as much as I enjoyed having Teddy this week, I'm looking forward to getting you all to myself again."
"So, what do you want to do when we get back to the tower?" Harry asked.
Daphne grinned, "I'll give you a hint; it involves a bed."
"Sleep?" Harry suggested, "Good idea, I'm knackered too."
The remark earned him a smack on the arm, but he probably deserved it. He grinned at Daphne and whispered as they approached the common room, "Don't you find it ironic, Daphne? That we're going to celebrate getting an O+ for family planning class by having sex?"
Daphne laughed loudly and said, "Oh, screw irony, Harry. The entire class was pointless, we both know the contraception charm, and neither of us are stupid enough to have sex drunk and not perform it properly."
Harry chuckled as they reached the door and its riddles.
"Well, you say that, but the smartest witch of her age forgot the charm one time, and the saviour of the wizarding world happened," James's voice said from behind them.
"James!" Lily scolded.
Harry and Daphne turned to look at the portrait.
"What?"
"You just told Harry that he was an accident!" Lily scolded.
"So?" James asked stupidly.
"So now he's going to feel bad!"
Harry snorted, "I kind of guessed, guys; you were in the middle of a war after all. It's not exactly the time when you plan to have a baby."
Sirius smirked, "Smart kid."
"Shut up, Sirius," Remus chuckled.
"You can't talk," Sirius snorted, "You had a kid in the middle of the war with my baby cousin."
"Oh, here we go," James rolled his eyes, "It's the tragic love ballad of Sirius and Remus!"
Lily chuckled.
"I mean, she's my baby cousin, and she's a Hufflepuff!"
Harry sniggered, "And they made a really cute kid who I love to bits."
Remus grinned out of the portrait at him, "And I am thrilled that you are looking after him."
"Even if he is a living reminder of your betrayal," Sirius muttered.
"Sirius, you were dead!"
"He's got a point, Pads."
"What? Jamie! You can't agree with him!"
"You were dead, Sirius."
"That's not the point! Eternal love goes beyond the grave Lily flower!"
"Come on," Daphne giggled, "Let's leave them to it."
* ~ TBC ~ *