Warning: do not read in public
I am absolutely pumped! The adrenaline from signing the final draft of the publishing contract still floods through my entire body as I enter the recording studio to pick Calliope up from work. Eliza left me with a ton of notes and editing homework that I will have to complete until I meet her again on Thursday. Which is the day after tomorrow, Arizona. It's fine though. I can do it. She and I agreed that I should scratch most of the sexual content and rewrite the rest of them into much less detailed versions. It will make it age-appropriate for a broader range of young adult readers. More importantly, it will make it future in-laws adequate!
"Hey, Crystal!", I beam at the receptionist with a full-dimpled smile.
She gives me her biggest grin in return, showing the small gap between her front teeth. "Arizona, it's good to see you." Handing me one of the visitor's badges, she turns the clipboard around so that I can sign in. "Callie is in her usual studio, you can go right through."
"Thank you." I remember the first day my girlfriend took me to the studio with her. Had it not been for her, I surely would have gotten lost in the maze of corridors of soundproof walls. I just followed her like a puppy, much less confident of my place in our relationship. And then, when I walked in alone for the first time, I received a lot of questioning looks. People stared at me like I did not belong here, and it did not help that it took me a while to find Callie's studio number. So much has changed since then. By now, I know this place like the back of my hand. Everyone who works here is aware of who I am. Additionally, I am very much at peace with myself and in our relationship.
Walking past a few of the security guards and greeting every single one of them, I finally make it to the studio that my gorgeous brunette always books. Callie says that there is something about this particular studio that makes her feel and sound better, but she cannot describe what it is. The lamp next to the door glows red, indicating that no one is supposed to go in, unless it is an emergency of course. Leaning against the opposite wall with my eyes focusing on the light, I pat my leather briefcase. It sounds so surreal that there is a signed book contract with my name on it inside this bag. Well, you better believe it, A, cause this is not a dream.
The minute I realize the light has switched to green, I knock and enter. "Hey, Ellie", I say when I am face to face with the recording engineer. "How's she doing today?" I have learned to ask Ellie before asking my girlfriend. There is no one on this planet that judges Callie's work harder than the brunette does herself. At times, it can be quite challenging. She is her own toughest critic and during many of her recording sessions, her perfectionism makes an appearance.
"I think she's doing amazing, her voice is really coming through in her new song. But I am just the technician and she is the boss, so you know I heard this song at least fifteen times already. Fifteen times today, that is." Ellie is used to musicians recording the same song over and over again. She once told me, that she had a band who could not keep it together for a whole song and it took them three days to record it. The whole album took over a month. That was when she had learned to be patient. According to her, my wonderful girlfriend and her obsessive need to make it perfect is pretty normal in this business. Plus, Callie is always polite about everything.
Sitting down on the only empty chair, I smile at Callie through the thick glass, knowing that she cannot hear me unless the microphone is on. Her teeth flash brightly as she gives me a megawatt smile in return. She looks so much at home behind the studio's equipment and with the big headphones on, and I can see that she is having fun. A, your girlfriend is hot!
"Alright! That sounded wonderful, Callie", Ellie compliments her, using the intercom system that connects the studio with our room. But we both know Callie is not happy, yet. "You wanna go again, don't you?" She has that certain look on her face when she is not one hundred percent satisfied with her performance and it is exactly the same look she is presenting right now right this second. "Alright, you're the boss", she says, not even needing a verbal confirmation from the brunette. "Tell me when you're ready."
I watch Callie sip some tea from her thermos jug – presumably mixed with honey to oil her vocal cords – gurgling it around before swallowing the liquid. It is something that I have seen multiple times before and I find it beyond sexy. Because you know what she can do with her mouth, Robbins. "Okay, I'm ready."
I slump back into the chair and place the headphones that Ellie hands me on my head. Practically feeling the goosebumps before they even appear, I know that whatever song she is about to sing will blow me away, They always do. She always does. And it is not just her voice. Callie's songwriting skills are unquestionably outstanding. The only reason that she has not produced one record after the other is her acting career, and honestly, I get it. Even more so, I would not want her to be touring all over the world while I am stuck in college.
The beat drums through the on-ears straight into my brain and my foot immediately begins to tap lightly against the ground below. It's catchy. Callie's hums join the music, her voice is clear and inviting. Eyelids fall shut, hiding the brunette's deep, soulful brown eyes from me as she concentrates on her song.
Me? I do almost the same. I focus on her, on the lyrics she will disclose, knowing that they will transport a message to me and everybody who will hear the song. Watching as she takes a deep breath, I listen closely while my teeth chew on the inside of my bottom lip.
"Can you imagine
What it would be
Like if we never met?
We never kissed?"
Uhm, no! And I don't even want to. Because I would most likely still be fulfilling my fantasy by writing fanfiction instead of knowing the sensation of her lips on mine. I would be forced to use my imagination, which never, not in a million years, holds a candle to the actual things Callie makes me feel. And I am not just talking about the physical reaction and attraction. I have never felt a love as strong as this for someone. She is the air that I need to breathe. The desire to be near her is all-consuming.
"Can you imagine
If we never got
To spend those nights
In each other's arms?"
Oh God, I would probably still be living with my parents – or maybe in a dorm room with a roommate that hates me. Law school would still be my hell on earth and I don't think I could have convinced my father to let me get out. And let's not talk about the fact that I would not be Callie Torres' girlfriend. Because, no. Just, no. I refuse to imagine this. Honestly, not having Callie in my life does not even seem like an option anymore.
"Oh I don't know how it feels
But it probably would kill me
Probably would tear me down"
Yes! I want to yell at her, this is exactly how I would feel. This and so many things I cannot even put into words. But, if the goosebumps that are covering every possible patch of my body are not enough of an answer, I would try. And if every word I know would not suffice, I would study dictionary after dictionary to find the right words.
"So I don't think about it
Cause my heart can't take it if you were gone
If you were gone"
The sheer attempt to picture my life without her in it gives me a headache. No one knows the 'what-ifs' in life, but I am one hundred percent certain that I would not be in the possession of a publishing contract. Heck, my story would still be safely concealed in my nightstand's drawer at my parents' home.
"Can you picture yourself
Getting over me
With someone else"
As sappy as it sounds, she has absolutely ruined me for anybody else. If Calliope is not the one by my side, I do not know who else could be. She means everything to me.
"I can't cause I feel like we
Are the exception to the rule
I know this love is true"
Me too, baby, me too. She has my heart, it is completely hers. I know that I can trust her. Her voice just got louder and higher and I feel as if I am about to melt into a puddle of lust. How can she evoke such reactions from me? Should that not be illegal? No, Arizona.
"And I don't know how it feels
But it probably would kill me
Probably would tear me down
So I, I don't think about it
Cuz my heart can't take it if you were gone
If you were gone
The last line runs on repeat a few times and I wonder how it would sound if more voices joined in, like a choir or a group of background singers. Knowing that what I am hearing is practically just the foundation, I cannot wait to hear the final product.
"Don't rewind anything
Too excited to see what tomorrow brings yeah"
There was a time in my life where my tomorrow looked just like my today and my yesterday. Back in law school – it seems like that was forever ago – every day was the same. Sure, the classes and professors changed, and most days I saw different faces in different seats of the lecture halls, but the quintessence was still the same. And then I met Callie, who changed my whole world with that one phone call.
"You changed my world around
And I'm not scared to go falling down in love
What if you were gone"
The song tapers out as the Latina throws in a couple of 'oohs' and 'aahs'. For a moment, I am rooted to my spot, utterly spend from the roller-coaster-ride of emotions that I just experienced and totally flabbergasted by what I just heard. When I snap out of my thoughts, I get up and almost rip the chord of the on-ears out of the pluck. "Sorry", I mutter towards Ellie but I am not sure she heard me. Does that stop me? Definitely not. There is only one thing on my mind: getting to Callie. "God, I love you", I confess the second I stand right in front of her. Placing my hands on the lower half of her back, I pull her closer before pressing my lips firmly against hers. Definitely tea with honey.
"Calliope? Where are you?", I call out after being done talking to my parents. My mother – after the initial hesitation and making sure that I was not getting scammed – is super excited about my publishing contract. My father on the other hand, is very apprehensive of the situation. He fears I will not manage to juggle both, the workload until to meet my deadlines, and classes. Thus, he is once again worried that I am throwing away my future and it does not matter how many times I tell him otherwise. "Calliope?", I ask again when I step into our bedroom.
The door to our en-suite bathroom is wide open, and even despite all the steam from the hot shower, my eyes fall on my very naked girlfriend and the water cascading down on her. I instantly feel the throbbing between my legs. Between witnessing Callie in her element, recording songs all afternoon, and seeing her very sensual body in all its glory, I really stand no chance. Damn it, Robbins, get it together. Forcing myself to look away before I end up attacking her in the shower, I try to find something to distract myself. What is the least sexiest thing I could do right now? Glancing around the room, I spot the laundry basket right where I left it when I was folding our clothes before my parents called. Perfect! Putting those away should do the trick.
Pulling out various drawers on both of our dressers, I begin with my self-given chore – but my plan has one big flaw. From here, I still have a direct view into the bathroom. And other than looking at the item in my hand to know where it goes, I don't need my vision to guide my hands. Just focus on the damn underwear in your hands, A. It's one of Callie's and I remember the last time I pulled it down her long legs like it was yesterday. FOCUS! I place it in the top drawer of her dresser and my fingernails grace something that is definitely too hard to be underwear – or any piece of clothing for that matter. My eyes go wide when I realize what it is. Heat rushes into my cheeks and between my legs, my heart starts palpitating harder in my chest.
Somehow a small part of my brain registers that the water stopped running and that the brunette's low humming is now very audible as she dries herself off. I make up my mind in a split second, discarding myself of all of my clothes, and step into the harness. Never in my life did I think that I was missing something when it came to pleasing women, or that I was less of a lover. I am gay, for crying out loud. Tonight will be the first time that I am the one wearing something like this, but I cannot wait to experience this with Callie. Let's hope you can show the same amount of stamina, A.
Listening to Callie rummaging and moving around in the bathroom, I quickly slip under the covers on my side of the bed before she spots me. And then I wait. And wait. The sound of the blow-dryer begins and ends moments later because she usually only dries the roots. I keep waiting. Knowing my girlfriend's routine, she is most likely to apply moisture to her silky-smooth skin next. I decide, that I am done waiting, so I call out her name once more, "Calliope?" I wanted to be patient, I did. It is simply not one of my strong suits.
"Yes, love", she answers, her voice low and a little raspy, strained from all the singing she has done today. I probably would not have an ounce of a voice left to talk after today. But then again, I am not a singer.
"Would you mind coming in here for a moment?" She does not need to know that it will be a long moment, right?
Emerging from the en-suite, Callie pulls one of her old private school t-shirts over her head. "What's wrong? Is everything alright? Did something happen to your parents?", she worries. She cares like crazy, and it is one of the things I love about her the most.
Gently patting her side of the bed so she sits down, I answer her questions, "My parents are fine and nothing is wrong. I just wanted to cop a feel." Shifting a little closer to her, I turn onto my left side, shooting her a wink and a dimpled smile. The moment the brunette's body is within reach, my fingertips seek out any sort of skin-on-skin-contact. Landing on her thigh, my hand immediately inches under the fabric of her shirt only to stop abruptly. "Someone is going commando..." As my teeth nip at my own bottom lip, it takes all the willpower I have to not push her onto her back and roll on top of her. I did not expect that.
A coy laugh paired with a moan escapes her full lips. "I forgot to grab fresh underwear before I stepped into the shower", she explains, but honestly, I could not care any less. On the contrary, fewer clothes to remove until I can have my way with her.
"Mhmm perfect", I murmur in appreciation and let my fingers glide up her body, softly caressing her belly on the way to my goal. My eyes find Callie's and – even in the soft light of the Miami sunset that streams through the windows – I can see the arousal in those dark chocolate orbs. Someone should probably close the curtains, Arizona. "You were amazing today", I whisper as my hand gingerly cups her breast, eliciting a whimper. "I could have listened to you all day, but I am also very happy to be home, to have you all to myself.
"Uh-huh", is all she gets out before she stops my hand and sits up straighter. For a hot second I think she is not in the mood, or too tired. Both of which would be valid reasons for me to stop everything in an instant. But then her eyes lock on mine once again and I swear they are even darker than before. She reaches for the hem of her shirt to lift it up and over her head.
You are trying to seduce her, Arizona, not the other way around! The approving moan that vibrates deep in my throat was unstoppable. It sounded almost like a growl. God, she's gorgeous. And I cannot wait to have her writhing beneath me.
"You okay over there?", she chuckles, catching me with my eyes wide open, staring at her slack-jawed. Leaning back into the pillow and maneuvering her very naked body under the blanket, Callie turns so we are facing each other, a smile tugging at her lips. "I love you", she declares, her breath hitching when my fingers once again rub over the skin of her breast, tweaking her nipple as they go. "Someone is impatient."
I push myself up so I am supporting myself on my left lower arm and elbow, mindful of the appendage between my legs. After all, I do not want to give my plan away too early. "I love you, too." My voice is barely above a whisper, a husk against her collarbone where my lips begin kissing her soft, tanned skin.
The brunette's hand grips my shoulder a little tighter, gravelly groans leaving her mouth while she enjoys my caress. "I wanna feel you, too", Callie states, letting her fingers wander under the blanket and along my torso. "You know, as much as I enjoy you being naked, I much rather undress you myself. You took my fun away."
If only she knew how much fun I am going to give her, she would not mind at all. "I can put my clothes back on, if you want, Calliope", I tease her in a mock attempt at getting up, to which she pulls me back down instantly. That's what I thought. "I never intended to take away your fun, Calliope, but I figured I can beat you to it and that way, my intentions are very clear." By now, my hand is completely spread out over her boob, the nipple hardening against my palm as my fingers draw light patterns on her skin. "I thought you wouldn't mind." Leaning closer once again, I gently bite into her shoulder and nip my way across her chest. Finally close to one of her hardened buds, I first circle it with my tongue and then suck it into my mouth, receiving a low moan in return.
"I do- don't mind, Arizo- na", she stammers and pushes my face away from her skin. "I just love ripping your clothes off."
Before I have a chance to react, I am pushed onto my back and Callie is partly on top of me. She is holding me as close as possible, kissing me as if it was the last night on earth and she has to make it count. Our tongues are dancing to an unknown melody, teeth clash every once in a while. It's hot. It's needy and it's loving at the same time. Her left hand begins to roam over my chest, fingernails carelessly scratching at the skin. When she is done exploring my breasts and her fingers travel lower in search of my sex, she gasps in surprise. "Someone is packing tonight."
I bite back the groan that dares to slip past my lips when she pushes the harness firmly into my center. My fingers dig into her upper arm, leaving crescent-shaped marks as they do so. "Fuck, Calliope", I moan eventually. "That was not part of my plan." Of course it feels good. Her actions are taking my breath away. But it is not what I envisioned while I was waiting for her to be done in the bathroom.
"So tell me, Arizona, what was your plan?", she asks seductively, her voice impossibly raspy and her eyes filled with desire as she keeps rubbing the fabric against my mound. "Hmm? What did you want to do to me?"
Taking a moment to regain control over my entire system and finding my words again, I admit, "I wanted to try and be the one to... use this on you tonight." When I get nothing from her, no reaction of any sort, I scramble to explain, "But I would never just do it, Calliope. Yes, I wanted it to be a surprise, but... but I would never lead you on and then just do something without your consent. Never. Especially not this."
"Relax, Arizona. I didn't think you would. I am merely asking what you want to do to me? Because I am up for almost anything", she reassures me, moving the harness around again so that one of the straps creates delicious friction against my bundle of nerves. "I am still waiting for an answer here." She is taunting me, giving me no chance to catch my breath.
"Shit." Why are my words not coming to me right now? It is like my brain is failing me on purpose, leaving me at her mercy. My head falls forward, landing on her chest as I struggle to form a coherent sentence. "Iwannafuckyou", I mumble into her skin, feeling her body shake as her giggles fill the air. Knowing that she is not mocking me, I take a couple of deep breaths and try again, "I want to fuck you with the strap-on." The statement is somewhat bold, I know. And a few months ago, you would not have said it like that, Arizona. But the more confident I grow in our relationship and the better I know Callie, the easier it is to just say what I want. Tonight, I want to take charge.
My announcement must have evoked something inside her because the next thing I know is that the pressure against my center is gone and my beautiful girlfriend groans in excitement. "Then come and fuck me, Arizona", she whispers into my ear before letting herself fall back into the pillow beneath her, waiting for me to make my move.
I am on top of her within a second, groping every part of her body within reach and kissing her fiercely. I will never get enough of her, that much I know. Her scent is intoxicating, her skin the smoothest I have ever touched and every little moan that slips past her lips and into my mouth is such a turn-on that it lights my whole body on fire. I am immensely enjoying this and I know she is too, but then a thought crosses my mind. Crap, A, you forgot to grab the lube.
Sensing my hesitation, the Latina takes my hand in her own, guiding them between her legs. She tears her lips away from mine and breathlessly groans, "Do you feel how wet I am?" Dipping both of our fingers between her folds and against her clit, she twitches beneath me. "The sheer thought of you using the strap-on on me is so arousing."
Oh God, definitely no lube needed. Instinctively, my fingers make their way towards her warm entrance, collecting the moisture only to bring it back up to her clit. I start with small circles around her bundle of pleasure, as light as the touch of a feather until I steadily increase the pressure. My mouth encloses one of her nipples, sucking gently. Callie is moaning and shifting below me, actively trying to get more contact. "Stop it, Calliope", I breathe out, blowing hot air against her areola. "This is my turn."
"Then get to it", she groans in response, grinding her hips against my fingers with even more vigor. When I still don't comply, she dares me, "Get to it, or I'll do it myse-." #
Cutting her off by taking her nipple back in my mouth and letting my teeth graze over it, I revel in all the little reactions I get out of her. She's so wet, and knowing that I am the reason is a big stroke for my ego. When I push myself up and support myself on my forearms on either side of her head, I simply stare at her for a moment. Scratch that, A, you're openly ogling her. Her breathing is ragged, her chest is rising quickly underneath that flushed skin. She's a work of art. I nudge her nose with mine and then lean close to her ear, whispering, "Are you ready for me, Calliope?"
"Please", my girlfriend whimpers when I use my right hand to let the silicone dildo glide through her folds, effectively parting them. She spreads her legs further apart to give me all the room I need. "I want you."
Realizing that she is more than ready for me, I connect our lips while I guide the faux phallus to her entrance and into her. Momentarily forgetting how to reciprocate the kiss, I feel her gasping against my mouth and still my movement. "Are you okay?", I wonder, concerned that I unintentionally hurt her. "Do you want me to pull out?" I think I was barely even inside her, maybe a couple of inches. But the last thing I want is to cause her pain. "I can-"
"Just hold still for a moment", she states, her voice low and husky, and then elaborates further, "It's been a while since I was on the receiving end of this, so I just need a moment to get used to the stretch." Sending a killer wink and her signature megawatt smile my way, I think I die a little bit inside. She's so incredibly sexy. "Okay, I think you can move now."
"Let me know if it hurts", I tell her to which she nods, so I slowly move my hips again. This is my first time ever using a toy like this, so I am extra careful, pushing in and pulling out only a fraction of an inch at a time. Judging by the sounds Callie makes, you must be doing something right, Robbins. The Latina is a freaking Goddess beneath me, with her head thrown back and her damp hair a mess on the pillow, her eyes closed and bottom lip held tightly between her perfect pearly white teeth. I feel her fingertips dipping into my shoulder blades and her legs come up to rest on my buttocks the moment the toy is completely inside her. Fuck, I think I just slipped another inch deeper. This feels really good. Way better than you anticipated it to feel on your end, Arizona.
Gasping for air, a tanned hand pushes against my shoulder, indicating me to stop moving. "Give me a second", she pleads. Her other hand climbs higher, fingers tangling in my hair and pulling lightly, keeping me in place. "I'm good", she says after a minute and rocks her hips against mine, effectively grinding the toy into herself. Maybe she should be on top?
I shake my head. That is an image for another time. Right now, I want to be in control and give her exactly what she has given me so many times before. So I pull out until only the tip of the fake dick is inside her and then I slam back in, tearing a moan from her throat. "So good", I husk, hoping that she feels everything I am feeling. "Is this okay?" Callie nods and I assume she does not trust her words right now. But it is enough of an affirmation that I keep going at a steady pace.
When my hips grow tired of all the thrusting and my arms are about to give out on me, I lay my body down atop hers. Her skin feels hot and sweaty and I can only guess that mine must feel the same. This is definitely a workout. "I love you", I breathe against her face, rotating my hips to give my thighs a break. "Are you okay?"
"I am fan-tas-tic", she replies between moans, her body moving with mine. "Are you sure this is your first time?" The nervous laugh that follows her question leaves me astounded and I inadvertently stop. "Keep going, please?", she begs, her words ripping me out of my amazement. "I'm getting close."
That is all of the encouragement I need. Lifting myself up again, I begin pounding into her with renewed vigor. Callie's groans and growls get louder every time I enter her, a telltale sign that she is indeed close to her climax. Yeah, and if you don't keep it together you'll reach yours just from watching her, A. The friction that the straps are creating between my legs is not helping. "Fuck, Calliope", I moan. "Come for me."
As if on cue, my girlfriend lets out a cry of pleasure as she tumbles over the edge and headfirst into her orgasm. The fingers in my hair pull tight – such a turn-on. Her legs cramp around my hips and it is harder to move.
Blowing a few loose strands out of my face, I wait and let her ride out her high. I am so close to following her into the bliss, I just need a little bit more. So when I feel her body relaxing, I slowly begin to rock my hips again. "Can I keep going?", I ask, needing her consent but wanting to continue all the same. Right now, I don't think I will ever want to stop. Until exhaustion takes over, that is.
She cannot form words yet, let alone sentences. But she nods and pulls me down into a searing, passionate kiss while using her feet to pull me as close as possible. "You feel amazing", she tells me when she breaks away from the kiss for a second, meeting me thrust for thrust.
Before I have the chance to say anything, our mouths meet in another kiss that is filled with fervor and ecstasy. It is intimate and intense, full of fire and love for one another. My muscles are tired, my knees hurt and my arms feel like jelly, but I push through, knowing that my release is only seconds away. When it hits me, it's like a freight train. Full force and so strong that my vision tinges white for a moment. I can hear Callie's moans dying in her throat as she crashes into her second climax of the night, her back arching off the mattress. Fingernails are clawing at my skin and possibly drawing blood, but I cannot bring myself to care. This is freaking hot!
When my girlfriend's body stops spasming beneath mine, she lets herself fall back into the bed, causing me to slump down on top of her with an umph. At first, I don't move. I simply relish in the closeness and the post-orgasmic euphoria. Yeah, I definitely get it now. "Do you want me to move?", I ask when I manage to get my breathing back under control.
Callie rubs her face, trying to clear away the haze. "Ugh", she grunts, "I think we have to, 'cause I think I made a mess?" Opening one eye, she almost looks embarrassed. And Calliope Torres does not deal with embarrassment easily.
"What do you mean?", I wonder, carefully pulling out of her and leaning back onto my calves. The silicone appendage is shining with her juices and I am that close to jumping her bones again until I spot the wetness on the sheets. My eyes go wide. "You... you squirted?" Fucking hot! I cannot help the proud grin that plasters itself onto my face. That's a first! I had no doubt that she was enjoying herself, but now I have visual evidence of how much pleasure I gave her. "Calliope... that is-"
She holds her hands up, stopping me from going any further. "That never happened to me!", Callie exclaims, clearly flustered. She is avoiding eye contact.
I don't think I have ever seen her like this, especially not during or after sex. It is cute, but it is not necessary. "I think it's amazing! I caused your body to react this way, do you know how awesome that is? Sure, we have to clean the sheets, and possibly have to sleep in the guestroom for tonight. But I don't care. Because we are hot and I just had one of the best days of my life." Reconnecting our lips in a kiss that is very different from its previous ones, full of love and appreciation for the other. "And maybe next time, we'll put a towel or two down before we start", I offer with a grin that earns me a slap against my upper arm.
A/N: So, I know this took a little bit to get out to you, I actually had the first half done right after Christmas but then I couldn't find the motivation to get the second part on paper. I'm sorry. By now, you should know that I finish my stories, but that means that I'm doing it on my own terms and in my own time. And sometimes that means, you guys have to wait a little longer. But since none of us writers on here are making 0 money writing/publishing fanfiction, it is not our only responsibility.
Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it!