Chapter Forty-Three
Shock rendered her speechless the second Sesshoumaru set her down before Kaede's hut instead of within some random clearing as expected.
Light poured through windows in a warm glow, inviting. Kagome felt her heart constrict. The old woman's hut had acted as the inutachi's main base of sorts. A home to return to when their journey became too weary. She summoned her courage, preparing to expose old wounds again and recount what had happened with Inuyasha despite the pain it caused her. She owed Kaede that much.
Pushing the covering over the door aside, she was immediately met with a tight hug- long sleeves wrapping around her- the old woman's height forcing her to bend down slightly.
"Ye have returned," Kaede muttered, gnarled hand patting her hair.
"U-uh, sure have?" Kagome blinked, understanding slowly dawning on her. "Wait...you already know...don't you?"
"A certain young girl told me, in order to spare you the grief of recounting it," Kaede glanced behind her where Rin slept peacefully, Jaken snoring not too far away.
Tears collected in the corners of Kagome's eyes, deeply touched. She was ushered inside- but not before catching Sesshoumaru's speedy exit, apparently not wanting to linger in the village.
Kaede poured her a cup of steaming tea, the two sitting by the irori and not saying much of anything for a while.
The weight of losing so many was a familiar burden to Kaede. As the village miko, she had brought many lives into the world by acting as a midwife- and gently lay others to rest, holding their funerals. Many people had come and gone during her time as a priestess.
"So my sister wishes to pull Inuyasha with her into the netherworld once more," she sighed heavily.
Nodding, Kagome's brows furrowed. "Is there anything you can think of to make her change her mind?"
"When she was alive, Kikyo was the type to nurture life. She encouraged Onigumo to live and cared for his wounds daily, despite the agony he went through just to keep breathing. I do not believe she would have wanted this fate for Inuyasha. The hate and sadness baked into her clay bones have changed her. There is no reasoning with her, I fear. Despite her cold countenance, she is now a being of pure feeling. And that feeling is the cool fury of injustice. She believes she is owed something, after suffering so much."
"I guess I can understand that to some degree," Kagome mumbled, wrapping both arms around her drawn-up knees. "I don't know what I'll say to her. Or to Inuyasha. I kept writing lists of impassioned speeches I could give to inspire someone to live again...but they were all so cheesy and hollow. The only thing giving me comfort right now is the belief that Miroku, Sango, Kirara and Shippo would want me to try."
"Ye will find the right words when the time comes."
"I hope so, Kaede," she mumbled, burying her face in her arms. "I really hope so."
Laying within that nostalgic little hut should've been comforting. She could pretend that her friends were still there- Inuyasha reclined against the wall, Tetsusaiga propped up against his shoulder- or feel Shippo's hair tickling her neck as they snuggled. But instead, other things were plaguing her mind. Kagome blushed, ducking her head and retreating further into her sleeping bag.
A flash of red eyes and bold magenta markings resounded in her mind, and Kagome grit her teeth, thighs squeezing together.
Stupid Sesshoumaru.
Sleep proved evasive for a long while as she turned over the new feelings awakened just a few hours ago- but ultimately, as the sky brightened outside, she was left with emptiness. Sadness. She'd wanted their friendship to go back to normal. Ever since the incident in the cave, he'd been a tad distant.
Now it felt like the space between them had only widened.
As always, Rin brightened up her day, like a pinch of zest in an otherwise overcast, bland morning. She'd gasped endearingly at Kagome's gifts of home cooking and early learning books- along with some writing utensils. She tucked into Mama's bento box immediately for breakfast, cooing at the explosion of rich tastes and flavours on her tongue. Even Jaken seemed happy, snatching the new and improved MP3 player with a gracious 'thank you, human.'
When Sesshoumaru deigned to return, Kagome hated the faint sense of awkwardness between them. He barely looked at her, and she forced herself to cover her disappointment up.
Kaede restocked her supply of arrows- and had even gone to the trouble of polishing her spear.
"Won't you come with us?" Kagome couldn't help but ask, lingering outside the hut. "Kikyo might be different, but you're still her sister. Maybe she'd listen to you."
"I have tried speaking with her on multiple occasions, only to have such sentimental thoughts proven wrong," Kaede sighed, clasping her shoulder and giving it a firm squeeze. "There are people who rely on me here. I feel I would only hinder matters. However...no matter what fate befalls my sister and Inuyasha, ye must not blame yourself if things do not work out, Kagome. Ye are not responsible for their happiness or choices."
She knew the old miko was just trying to offer comfort, but Kagome could only nod mutely, not reassured by such flowery words.
She would feel responsible either way.
Sesshoumaru started walking away- his cue to leave and wrap up the conversation. Kagome scrambled to bid farewell to Kaede, promising to visit after the New Moon looming just six days away.
Rin politely waved at the miko, before taking Kagome's hand during the walk away from the village.
Kagome squeezed it, holding back the sting of tears. "You didn't have to go to the trouble of explaining everything to Kaede for me," she said softly, glancing at her with a wobbly smile. "But I'm grateful. It made things a lot easier."
The little girl brightened, swinging their joined hands. "You're welcome!" she chirped.
They met up with Ah-Un again, who had been lingering at the border of the trees, gorging themselves on vegetation. Kagome attached some of her things to their saddle, giving them carrots as an apology for the weight. Ah-Un didn't seem to mind, but gratefully accepted the carrots with satisfied snaps of their mouths.
"...You have a letter, Rin," a certain silky voice called from the front of the group.
"Huh?"
Kagome and Rin blinked as an envelope was passed down to Jaken, who eyed it suspiciously, handing it over to the little girl.
She glanced at Kagome with confusion, who grinned and fluttered her hands. "Open it! I want to see who it's from."
Wrestling with crisp white paper, Rin tore it open and carefully pulled out the letter, squinting at the characters. Since she found reading a little difficult at the best of times- never mind while they were walking, Kagome scooped the girl up and placed her in Ah-Un's saddle.
"It says; Hello...Rin," brown eyes crinkled at the edges. "You don't know...m-me but my...name is…"
Since she fell quiet, Kagome ducked in close to read over her shoulder, gasping. "Souta! Aww, that's so sweet. I had no idea he'd written a letter. Though I'm curious about why he's talking to you."
"Apparently the boy wishes to become 'pen pals' with her," Sesshoumaru uttered, hanging back to match their pace, walking on Ah-Un's other side so that they both had access to snooping rights over Rin's shoulder.
Kagome grinned, clapping her hands, "ah- so cute! I never would've thought of that."
Rin was still struggling, so Sesshoumaru leaned in slightly, golden eyes roving over the page.
"I live 500 years in the future. I hope we can be friends. What is it like living there? What are your favourite things? Mine are…" his brows furrowed with concentration, trying to discern the new word.
"Soccer," Kagome finished, pretending to kick something. "It's like playing with the Kemari ball," she explained.
Rin and Sesshoumaru made brief noises of understanding, reading on together and only stopping when crossing an unfamiliar term such as 'Ramen,' 'Gacha machines' or 'Gundam models.' Kagome inwardly sighed, wishing her brother had been a tad more considerate of the Feudal Era's residents lack of knowledge on such things. But Rin seemed ecstatic.
She smiled so gently and so widely while reading the letter. Even after they'd finished, she clutched it close and re-read the characters carefully over and over again.
"So...we're walking towards Inuyasha's location now, I take it?" Kagome asked, making conversation.
"No, something has come to my attention. We head for Bokuseno first."
She arched a brow, not even pretending to know who that was. "Why? What's happened?"
"Naraku seeks to use incense to boost the undead priestess' barrier during the New Moon. Bokuseno knows much about how to thwart such things that rely on natural herbs. We have enough time for the journey, do not fuss."
Kagome lifted a shoulder, "wasn't going to. I trust you," she muttered offhandedly.
Sesshoumaru fell quiet. He paused, mouth parting as though about to say something-
"I want to write back right away!"
The miko and Daiyoukai jolted, having been briefly lost in thought. Rin glanced between them expectantly, holding her letter tight. Sesshoumaru stifled a sigh, "you may do so, but understand- the miko and I will not be returning to the future for some time."
"That's fine!" Rin grinned, a glow lighting up her face. "I don't mind at all!"
The demon lord stared, severe features softening just a little. Golden eyes strayed to Kagome, who shot him a knowing look.
What a softie. If they didn't have the New Moon to think about, she wagered he'd deliver it a lot sooner.
Sesshoumaru quietly huffed, causing her to feel a fierce plume of affection- which immediately had him stiffening.
Red swamped his golden gaze.
Kagome's heel dragged on the ground, causing her to stumble. Quick as a flash, the burning embers were snuffed out, but the damage had been done.
Sesshoumaru squeezed his eyes shut, exhaling slowly. He then quickened his pace to widen the gap between them once more.
Kagome watched him go with a crestfallen expression, avoiding Rin's questioning look. They didn't exchange more than a few words for the rest of the day.
After making camp and settling down beside Rin, who very much loved her new sleeping arrangement (a pink sleeping bag) Kagome looked up at the cloudless and clear skies above.
While everyone else slipped into sleep, she remained wide awake.
After bathing, hoping it would ease whatever tension Sesshoumaru felt by trying to keep herself as clean as possible- she'd noticed him returning from the forest. Damp bangs had curled against his forehead. Silver hair plastered to his shoulders. His armour was slightly askew.
He'd bathed, undressing and redressing without her assistance.
It shouldn't have bothered her. It really shouldn't have bothered her.
Kagome squeezed troubled blue eyes shut.
But it did.
Now, of all times, Kagome wanted him close, wanted to sleep beside him again. Despite how selfish she knew that to be- she couldn't help it. His sturdy presence had become something of a comfort to her.
She found herself feeling more isolated than before, and she could blame it on periods all she wanted, but there was something else going on. Some kind of underlying wariness in Sesshoumaru's eyes whenever she drew close.
Drowning in emotion, Kagome winced as her abdomen clenched, silently suffering from her monthly cycle's aches and pains. She couldn't help but mentally call out for him, hoping he might draw in close. Hold her again.
She fell asleep wishing for it.
Unbeknownst to the miko, a pair of hooded, deep molten orange eyes stared at her from across the camp, unblinking.
Sesshoumaru scraped sharp claws down the bark of a tree- aged wood splintering. Panting softly, he swallowed a pool of saliva within his mouth.
He felt immersed, knee-deep in the rich, metallic, animal scent of her blood. It was there in every inhale like ash choking his lungs.
Enough.
Standing from his spot, Sesshoumaru reigned in his instinctive reactions, seizing control once more. This was not normal. He never succumbed to whimpering like a pup for a female during her heat. He could be affected, yes. But to this degree? Never. It deeply unsettled one so proud.
Striding to Jaken's sleeping spot, he prodded the imp awake with a harsh nudge of his boot.
"Ack! Y-yes, milord?"
"Guard them," Sesshoumaru bit out, storming away from camp without another word.
He needed to vent some frustration. Now. If he did not, he would remain distracted and vulnerable to attack for the rest of the week.
And… the miko would grow even more despondent. This was not the winning attitude she needed in order to take victory during the New Moon.
Striding through the forest to gain some distance but keeping his pack within his keen hearing range to monitor them, Sesshoumaru let youki flow free, lacing it with certain pheromones. The call was unmistakable.
He wanted something, and if a passing demoness happened to want it too, they knew where to find him.