43.
Love, Love, Love
"Hey, Shizuru," Natsuki was laying in bed, her wife's arms wrapped around her, "I don't know that I ever asked this before, but…why was it that you fell in love with me?"
Shizuru looked at her, "Ara?"
"Oh, I know that you do, and it's mutual. It's just…I know why I fell in love with you. You were always kind to me. You made me feel like someone gave a damn about me. But…what made you fall for me in the first place?"
Shizuru smiled, "It's funny that 'fall' is the term we use, isn't it? I certainly fell a long way because of it."
"Okay, if you're going to get all depressive and brooding about the Festival again, I'm regretting bringing this topic up."
"Oh, it's not because of you. The Festival has been on my mind a good deal lately. But as to your question, it's actually a happy memory for me.
"I remember seeing you, back then in your first year of middle school, and you were…well, you know what you were like then."
"Dark and mysterious?" Natsuki grinned.
"If by that, Natsuki means standoffish, rude, and prone to menacing stares, then certainly," Shizuru smiled serenely.
"Which of us is the meanie, again?" Natsuki laughed.
"Natsuki was sitting alone, and it caught my attention. At first I thought, 'Well, if I can tease this lonely little girl, she'll join my entourage, and have friends of her own.' But then, you showed no interest in me. And that's the first thing that got my attention. You weren't interested in me because of my status, or my family, or even because of some of that 'Class-S Relationship' nonsense that the other girls had. You were determined to be on your own.
"And it didn't take me long to figure out why. A few discreet inquiries, and I learned that your mother had died, or so we thought at the tiime. And that you had spent a year recovering from the accident. I was intrigued. And impressed. And when you finally opened up to me? That's when I knew that I was in love with you."
"What? Because I decided to talk to you on my own?"
"Of course. It meant that you trusted me. And that meant something to me. Because you weren't one of those lovesick schoolgirls. You came to me out of genuine feeling. And it touched me in a way I'd never felt before. I knew then that your trust, your friendship meant more to me than anything else going on in school at that point. And...it was sheer torment. Because I knew also that I loved you romantically, but I was so sure at the time that I would never be able to express that to you."
"Well," Natsuki smiled, turning around so she could return Shizuru's embrace, "I'm glad you were wrong about that."
Shizuru started giggling.
"What? What'd I say?"
Shizuru tried to stifle her giggles, to no avail, "I know you wanted to hug me back, Natsuki, but when you turned around, I'm afraid that Sachiko put a larger space between us."
Natsuki looked down at the baby bump, chuckling, "Maybe, but I've still got my arms around you, and I'm not letting go."
"Anyway, that's why I started teasing you, back then. Because I loved you, but I didn't think I'd be allowed to. So, I was left with teasing. But yes, it was when I knew that I mattered to you, and I alone, that I fell in love with you."
"Honestly, Shizuru, I said before that Nao and I were similar, and that you were the one who kept me from turning out how she used to be. But honestly, I think that if you weren't there for me, I'd have been worse than Nao."
"Oh?"
"I was on a quest for revenge. And my Elements were pistols. And my Child was one of the few with artillery. The only thing that kept Duran's power limited was my unwillingness to admit that there was a person who mattered to me.
"But with the power I did have? You're the reason I never actually killed anyone, y'know."
"I am?"
"I'm not just talking about what happened with District One, either. There were so many clandestine missions against various facilities, and occasions where I was in seedy bars with the same kinds of perverts that Nao was hunting for.
"I certainly beat the crap out of a few handsy guys, and some guards at various District One facilities. But I never killed anyone. I kept thinking, 'Shizuru thinks you're a decent person. Would you be able to look her in the eye if you killed someone?' And I held myself back. I mean, I was still prepared to kill in self-defense. I wasn't going to let those creeps take me out. But only as an absolute last resort. Only if I knew I could justify it to you and you would agree.
"By comparison, all Nao did was rough some guys up and rob 'em blind when she was on her own. If I'd been left on my own, I could have been a cold-blooded killer."
"Whereas, I became one," Shizuru sighed.
She rose from the bed. Natsuki rose after her, and embraced her, "Shizuru, the people at District One that you killed, they were none of them good people. And that's not just me saying that to justify what you did."
Natsuki went over to her closet, and found a large box in the back. From it, she pulled a stack of manila folders.
"I asked Yamada to do me one last job. To find out how many people died in the events at District One, and who they were. Not just names, but histories.
"They were killers, Shizuru. All of them. Starting first and foremost with the three old women you mentioned to me. Each one of them was a HiME who had won her own Festival, going back 1200 years. And then, they willingly perpetuated that same tragedy on the next batch of HiME. That's the fate that Mai broke, may whatever gods exist bless that girl.
"And the goons in the black suits. Every last one of them had bodies to their name. The scientists? You don't want to know about the kinds of experimentation they performed to perfect their mind-wipe techniques on witnesses.
"I set this aside after reading it, because at the time, it seemed like you'd accepted that what happened then wasn't your fault. The star's influence, combined with what happened between us in that garden, it broke you for a bit. But it's not who you are or were. I mean, Shiho killed, as well. So did Mikoto. I don't see you rushing to judge the two of them for their actions, so why blame yourself?"
Shizuru smiled weakly, "It's easier to forgive others than one's own self. Self-forgiveness can seem self-serving."
"So is self-recrimination," Natsuki pointed out, "Anyway, I saved these files for you, in case you ever needed to be shown that the people you killed during the Festival weren't saints. They were thugs and killers. Just better dressed than most. And then they poked and prodded at a vulnerable teenaged girl until the whole damn mess blew up in their faces. Reito told you, remember, that it was the Obsidian Prince who had Nagi tell you just where to find them. You could have been resolved to kill them all you wanted, but you'd have had no idea what to do about finding them without that.
"And why did the Obsidian Prince decide to waste his own people? Well, because he decided that humanity was no good and wanted to wipe the slate clean. Trust me, Shizuru, you're very good at getting people to do what you want them to do, but your skills are nothing compared to an otherworldly being with over a thousand years of practice at it. You were manipulated, and this time the manipulators were the ones who got burned."
"You're very kind, Natsuki," Shizuru said after a moment, looking at the folders.
"So are you. Besides, I think Nao said it to me the best. The problem for you, is you never learned to master fear."
Shizuru blinked, "Ara? Fear?"
"It's kinda embarrassing to get tongue tied as a writer. How did Nao put it? It was right after my motorcycle accident. Oh, yeah, she said, 'Fujino was more scared than all of us, in those days. She was just really good at hiding it.
"She was scared of herself, most of all, back then. Scared that she was a deviant. Scared that you'd find out and hate her. Scared that everyone saw through her. Scared that you'd die in the Festival. That girl was a mass of frayed nerves. She just hid it behind a serene smile, a tea cup, and a soft voice. Until Kikukawa outed her, and she cracked. Then, all of that fear turned into a murderous rampage.
"The one thing Fujino never learned how to handle well was being afraid.'"
Shizuru blinked, then laughed, "Oh, that is too good. I thought I'd given Nao too much credit back then, but it turns out that I hadn't given her enough."
"Pardon?"
"Well, when I first confronted her, at that sea cliff. Remember. I told her that she was too self-conscious, that if she'd been more oblivious, she might have had an easier time of things. But, of course, it was her who observed me for what I was, the whole time."
"C'mon. Let's get dressed for the day. We've got Haruka's baby shower to attend, after all."
They were just about ready to go when Nao came up, holding her phone, "Um…hey, bad news. The Baby Shower is being called off."
Natsuki and Shizuru exchanged glances, "Nao, did Haruka miscarry?"
"No. But it's not a good situation. Her husband was just arrested for embezzling funds from the Suzushiro Construction Company, and she's filed for a divorce."
"Oh, poor Haruka!" Shizuru shook her head, "Natsuki, come on. We're going to go see how she's doing."
8888888
Haruka was not, to say the least, doing well. She was a seething mass of rage and grief.
"How could that bastard do this to me and my family!?" She asked with a frightful shout.
"He fooled many people, Haruka," Shizuru went to her and put her arms around her, "Not just you. He fooled your parents. He fooled the board of directors. He even fooled me, for I thought he was an earnest and decent young man, too."
Haruka cut her a wry smile, "Because you have a lot of experience with that sort of thing?"
"Hey, she's trying to be supportive, you think-skulled nitwit!" Natsuki said, "You don't have to get snide about it."
Haruka blinked, then sighed, "Sorry, Fujino. It figures that marriage, even your psuedo-marriage, is just one more area where you'd beat me.
"I mean, what you have isn't official, after all, but you two are still a lot happier than I turned out to be, in the end."
"It's not the end, Haruka," Shizuru said, "And it's hardly a competition. I had hoped that you'd found a loving man who would hold you dear and cherish you, the way you deserve to be."
"So…," Natsuki sighed, "I hate to be the one to ask this, but…how much did he steal, and can they recover it?"
"Just about 440 million yen," Haruka sighed, "And as for recovering it, I guess you didn't turn on the news when Nao told you about it, but it turns out he's got children with other women. I am…utterly disgraced."
"How are you disgraced?" Natsuki asked, "He's the lying, cheating bastard."
Haruka glanced at Shizuru, "She really doesn't grasp higher society, does she?"
"Believe it or not, it is one of the things I find more endearing about her."
"Look, Kuga, the media is saying that I was either in on the embezzling, meaning no other company will trust me ever again, or that I was an ignorant buffoon to let this sort of thing happen right under my nose, in which case, no other company will trust me ever again.
"And of course, the company can reclaim anything of value that was his to recompense as much of their stolen funds as possible, which means that I'm going to lose my house, the car, and a bunch of other stuff. I'm having to move in with my parents again, and I'm now carrying my husband's illegitimate daughter because I'm divorcing the bastard. Ugh."
"Well, I, for one, have never felt that a child could be considered 'illegitimate'," Shizuru said flatly.
"I should have just shacked up with Yukino, after all," Haruka sighed, "Then, at least, I'd've had someone who cared about me, wouldn't stab me in the back, and wouldn't have left me knocked up while they went off to jail."
"With a few other poor kids tossed in for good measure," Natsuki sighed, "What a piece of work."
"But it's too late, now. Yukino is spoken for," Haruka sighed, "And I have no idea what I'm going to do now."
"Haruka Suzushiro, if you weren't pregnant, I would slap you right now," Shizuru said sharply, "You, the woman who challenged me while I had a weapon and a monster at my disposal, you're backing down from a challenge? I saw you take out an armed gunman. After he pistol whipped you! And you're throwing in the towel? You are not the Haruka Suzushiro I remember."
"Well, if you have any suggestions, I'm open to them," Haruka sighed.
"For one thing, we will take you at the Fujino Conglomerate. It will go a long way to establishing your innocence. I will have our lawyers pour through the accounting and demonstrate that you were not involved in the embezzlement."
"That's fine," Haruka said, "But it doesn't clear up the rumors of my ineptitude."
"Oh, but it will. You see, if we can demonstrate that you had no possible way of knowing, then it means that you weren't inept. And, as an opening gambit, the Fujino Conglomerate will purchase this house for the amount needed to recoup your losses, then reserve it as a dwelling for our vice president in charge of Shipping."
"Shizuru…" Haruka gasped.
"Haruka, don't you understand that, for all intents and purposes, you're like family?" Shizuru smiled at her, "You're like the annoying little sister nipping at my heels that I never had."
"And you're the spoiled brat older sister I never wanted," Haruka cried, hugging her.
"Okay, well, I'm going to go out and tell the others that Haruka's okay," Natsuki said, "And then maybe we could do some normal cheering up, like taking Haruka to dinner."
"So boring, Natsuki," Shizuru sighed.
"I could suggest staying in and cooking for her," Natsuki smirked.
"Dinner out it is!" Haruka yelped.