So, baby or not baby? (Of course that's a rhetorical questions, I gather you all know the answer by now ;D)
October 2021
- So it's been out of date for four months! exclaimed Anna.
- Oh. Wow. So you might be…
- I might jolly well be, she agreed.
- Well. We'll have to stop by the store to buy a pregnancy test on the way home, he said, smiling. I must say that would be a very fine ending to this very fine two days.
Seeing that she didn't seem as thrilled as he felt, he added:
- What is it love? Are you freaking out?
She passed her hands on her face and sighed:
- No, no, I'm not… Yes, alright well maybe a little, she admitted. I mean, this is not how we had planned this to happen.
- But does it really matter my darling? he said, taking her hand. You said yourself you wanted a baby last summer. Maybe we'll have one, only a little bit sooner than we expected. Do you mind? I know I don't.
- No, not really, I guess, she smiled. It's just my control-freak self who's rebelling. I'll shut her mouth.
He laughed.
- Now, let's finish this breakfast and be on our way home. I'm rather dying you take that test now, he smirked.
x x x x
They were both pacing the living-room, while waiting for the test's result. They both froze when the timer dinged at the end of the three minutes waiting time.
- Shall I look? asked John. Or do you want to?
- Look, she replied, inhaling sharply.
He took the test and Anna knew the answer when a wide grin broke out on his face.
- Oh darling! We're having a baby!
Before she could answer anything, he swept her off her feet and turned around on the spot, holding her in his arms. She laughed as tears shone in her eyes. As he put her back down on the floor, she said:
- Well the mood surely is quite different than the last time I took that kind of test.
John brought his hand on her cheek, wiping a stray tear:
- Are you happy, though, my love? Really?
She turned her head and kissed the inside of his palm.
- Of course I am. What was it you said to me once? "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans"? Well, let's go with that one.
He shot her the happiest of smiles.
- Oh Lord, I'm going to be a father!
She looked at him with a pretend-shocked look, as he slowly realized how his last words must have sounded like to her, regarding Timmy.
- I mean, oh God, that's so not what I meant, I'm sorry... You do know I love Timmy and I already consider myself his father, do you? This baby is not going to change that. I hope you're not mad…
- John! she cut, laughing. Stop badgering! I know what you meant, you have the right to be excited about this baby. Don't apologize! It's alright. I'm excited too to have this baby with you.
- Oh thank God, he sighed. I was so scared you'd take it the wrong way.
He pulled her into his arms and they stayed embraced for a long moment.
- So, he asked again after a while. Do you know how far along you are, approximately?
- Let me think… she frowned.
She checked on her phone calendar and went on:
- My last cycle was about six and a half weeks ago. I had not bothered, since I had irregular cycles with the implant. It's a frequent side effect. Anyway, I'll make an appointment with my OBGYN to have an ultrasound. Then we'll know for sure.
- I can't wait.
- But please, I think it would be best we didn't tell Timmy yet. It's still very early, anything could happen.
- Alright, as you wish.
- God I hope I won't be too sick… I can't really afford to miss work.
- We'll see. I won't let you put yourself at risk though.
- I'll have to stop night shifts anyway. It's the hospital's policy. Pregnant women are not allowed to work nightly.
- Very good policy, he pointed.
- That means less money for us. Night shifts are better paid.
- I don't care. We have enough money as it is. Money is secondary to your and our baby's health.
She smiled to him. He sure was going to be annoyingly overprotective, but it was so cute.
- I have to tell Mary, she said. She's going to be over the moon!
She took her smartphone out, took a picture of the positive pregnancy test and forwarded it to Mary, with the comment:
"Surprise Wedding present!"
She only had to wait a mere thirty seconds before her phone rang in response.
- Hi Mary!
- Anna! What the hell?! You're pregnant? beamed her friend. You had not told me you were trying? I thought you wanted to wait until after the adoption?
- Well yes, I wanted. But it seems I forgot that my implant went out of date last June, and not next June. So here we are.
- How are you feeling?
- Good, good. There was a little time of freaking out, you know me. But I'm happy. And John is so thrilled, it makes me happy.
- I can imagine. Oh Anna I'm so glad for you two. You'll be a wonderful family!
- Thanks Mary.
- So, I have to go now, but congratulations to both of you!
Anna hung up, smiling. John, who was looking at her, said:
- I gather she's pleased.
Anna laughed.
- She is. Now we should go pick up Timmy at the Carsons.
x x x x
Unfortunately for Anna, the sickness only got worse and worse in the following days. From occurring only in the morning, the nausea and vomiting spread to the whole day, and after two weeks, she even had to get up at night two or three times to throw up. She could barely keep any food, and she had already lost five pounds. John looked at her, worried and helpless, and tried to care for her at best he could. Her first OBGYN appointment was in two days. He had tried to make her call the doctor's secretary to have an appointment sooner, but she had been as stubborn as ever, and had waited for the original appointment. She had managed until now to continue going to work, although John wondered how she managed to stand all day, not to mention handling complex medical situations. That day though, after seeing her rush to the staff bathroom for the third time in the space of two hours, and almost fainting when she had come back, Phyllis Baxter had forced her to go home, and told her she didn't want to see her again before she had seen her doctor and got better. Too exhausted to ride the bus home (the bike had been left to its own devices for two weeks now), she had called John to pick her up at the hospital. When she had finally sat in his car's passenger's seat, he told her sternly:
- Now will you please rest?! You won't get any award for killing yourself for duty. Or losing our child. You have to take care of yourself Anna, for God's sake! Don't you think you've given enough time and energy to the hospital in the last eighteen months?! Now I'm getting you into bed until we see that OBGYN tomorrow!
She didn't even answer, but only feebly nodded, her eyes closed.
x x x x
At five o'clock the following morning, Anna had once again come back from the bathroom, when she shook John awake:
- John! John!
He was immediately alert and replied:
- What is it love?
Her voice wavered as she answered:
- I'm bleeding…
- Oh no…
He sat up in the bed, lit up his bedside lamp and looked at her, his hair ruffled up with sleep.
- Hum, er, what should we do? Do I drive you to the hospital?
Anna frowned and thought for a minute, then she sighed.
- We have an appointment with Dr Turner in three hours' time. I think it can wait until then. I'm not in any pain for the moment, and the bleeding is quite mild. If we go to the A&E, they'll just have me wait for an ultrasound, and I might not get it before eight o'clock. So I'd rather wait that time in my own bed than on a stretcher in the A&E hallway.
- Alright… But please tell me if anything gets worse?
- I promise, she said, putting herself back in the bed.
He looked at her for a moment, wondering how she could be that calm. Or was she just pretending to be calm for his sake?
- Anna?
- Hmm?
- How do you stay so calm? Aren't you a little worried?
A tear escaped her closed eyes before she whispered:
- I'm terrified John. I'm just trying my best not to lose it.
- Oh, Anna, I'm sorry… he said, taking her into his arms. I'm so scared too…
x x x x
Three hours later, Anna and John were anxiously waiting in Dr Turner's waiting-room in the OBGYN department. At last the secretary called after her:
- Mrs Smith-Bates, the doctor will see you now.
Both John and Anna entered Dr Turner's office, who smiled when he looked up to them:
- Anna, hello!
- Hi Patrick, answered Anna.
- Mr Bates, he added, nodding to John.
They were on first-name-terms with Anna, as they had often managed patients together (the last one having been Mary, some months ago).
- Mr Smith-Bates, corrected John, winking to Anna.
- Sorry. Please, sit, the two of you. So, I gather there is news of an early pregnancy?
- Yes, agreed Anna, but the news might not be so good I'm afraid. I've been bleeding for a few hours now. And I have some pelvic cramps.
- Oh. Is the bleeding heavy?
- Not so much. Like a light period I'd say.
- And do you know how far along you are?
- If I count right, my last cycle was about nine weeks ago, so that'd make a seven-weeks old pregnancy.
- Alright. Well I think first thing we have to do is an ultra-sound. See what's going on.
- Doctor, interjected John, she's not telling you, but she has been awfully sick for the last two weeks. She keeps vomiting a dozen times a day, and even at night. She has lost some weight, she's exhausted. Her head nurse ordered her back home yesterday, she wouldn't take any sick leave sooner.
- Ah… I see that Mrs Smith-Bates is like every other doctors-patients I've been caring for. Always caring for the others, never for themselves. Well we'll have to see to that. Now, if you'd please come with me, we will perform the ultra-sound. If you're alright with it Anna, we'll do it vaginally, it gives a far better view at this term of pregnancy.
- Yes, sure, she replied, and started to undress.
A moment later, she was settled on the exam bed, and Dr Turner was performing the ultra-sound. It didn't take him long to see what was going on. A frown appeared on his face, as Anna exclaimed:
- Oh, what the f…
She clapped her hand on her mouth to prevent herself from saying the actual F-word, and Dr Turner smiled to her. She had a sufficient knowledge in interpreting an ultrasound to have figured out what made the OBGYN frown.
- I gather you are seeing what I'm seeing then, Anna?
- What?! asked John nervously. What are you seeing?!
- Do you want to tell your husband or shall I? asked Dr Turner.
- I'll do it. Correct me if I'm wrong though?
- Sure.
Dr Turner turned the screen a little closer to Anna, so that she could point on it.
- John, you see those two little black bubbles with something like a white bean in it?
- Yes?
- Those are two embryos. You see the little blinking thing inside the beans?
- Yes?
- That's their heartbeat.
John looked at her, baffled:
- Are you telling me we're having twins?
- Looks like it.
- Jesus, he breathed. But why are you bleeding then? If both are well?
- That's the thing, added Dr Turner. You see that third bubble, that's filled with grey and white?
- Yes?
- That was a third embryo.
- Third?! gasped John. Wait, "was", you say?
- Yes. There was three embryos, and one of them is miscarrying.
- Oh. Wow. Anna… he breathed, taking her hand.
Her eyes were filled with tears.
- We're losing one baby… she said, wiping her cheek.
- Honestly, Anna, continued Dr Turner, you know as well as I do how dangerous triple pregnancies are. I can't say I'm not relieved it won't happen. Would you have been so keen on having triplets?
She laughed sadly.
- No, not really… Two babies are already one more than we had hoped for… But still, I'm a bit sad to say goodbye to this little one.
John took her hand and brought it to his mouth to kiss it.
- I'm rather relieved, he said. Three babies my God. I'm not sure I would have been up to it. I'm not that young anymore…
- Well. Anyway, things are done now, concluded Anna.
- But, doctor, asked John, will the other two be OK? How can we be sure we won't lose them too?
Dr Turner looked at him with a sad and honest smile:
- Unfortunately, we can't. We will have to wait and see what happens. And, he added, looking pointedly at his stubborn patient, the mother will have to take it easy! So, now, Anna, I'm writing you a two-weeks-long sick leave.
- What, two weeks?! protested Anna.
- TWO WEEKS, and no discussion! repeated the doctor. And you'll go down to the lab and take a blood test to make sure you're not dehydrated after all the vomiting. And I'm prescribing you something to make it stop. From what your husband tells me, you're suffering from hyperemesis gravidarum. That's serious, but we have some rather effective treatments now. Of course, the first and most important treatment is rest. Do you hear me Dr Smith?
- Yes, yes, I hear you Patrick, answered Anna ruefully. I'll rest, I promise.
- I'm glad to hear that. And I'm confident that Mr Smith-Bates will ensure that you follow my prescriptions.
- I will Doctor.
- So, I want to see you back in two weeks, before you go back to work, if you are in any state to. We'll check on the ultrasound if both remaining babies are growing as expected.
An hour later, after Anna had been to the lab to have her blood-test done, and they had been to the hospital's pharmacy to have her anti-nausea pills delivered, Anna and John found themselves in John's car, a bit baffled. John exhaled loudly:
- Pfeeeww, that was unexpected. I can't wrap my head around the fact that we came that close to having triplets.
- Oh my God… sighed Anna. Patrick's right, twins are largely enough trouble as it is… Jesus I hope everything will be fine.
- Let's take it one day at a time sweetheart.
- There's pretty much nothing else we can do anyway, agreed Anna.
x x x x
Later in the day, Anna had been settled on the couch with some tea. Dr Turner's pills seemed to have improved the situation a bit, although she didn't want to call it a victory so soon. Maybe it was also the fact that there were only two embryos left instead of three. Mary had picked up Timmy from school, and had brought him back to their home. The three adults were having tea in the living-room while the kids were playing in Timmy's bedroom.
- So, twins, really?! smirked Mary. You were never one to take the easy road, were you. Though I must say, very good way to learn about it: you're so relieved not to have triplets, that you don't even have the time to freak out about having twins! I must say that's clever.
Anna laughed.
- I am freaking out a bit though.
- Did the doctor say if they were identical?
- We can't know at that stage. What we do know though, is that each baby had its own bubble and its own placenta, which is good because it makes the pregnancy less risky for the babies. So either they came from two eggs, either it's just one egg that split very early, there's no way to know. Later, if ever we see it's a boy and a girl of course we'll have our answer. If it's two boys or two girls, we will never know for sure.
- OK I understand, said Mary. So, how do you feel?
Anna slowly breathed out before answering:
- Tired. Shocked. Relieved. Grateful…
Mary laughed.
- And what about you John?
- About the same, he answered, reaching for Anna's hand. And I dearly hope everything will go well.
Anna smiled fondly at him.
- But please, Mary, we're not telling Timmy yet, so don't tell George either.
- Alright. I won't.
That night, Anna lay in bed curled up into John's arms. She felt slightly better, having been able to drink and eat a bit more than the previous days. She had received her blood tests results a few hours earlier, and there was nothing worrying. She sighed as John softly stroked her hair.
- We'll manage, won't we John?
- Of course we will my love. One day at a time, like we said this morning. As long as we have each other, we will make it.
- There's no one else in the world I would have done this with. I love you John.
- I love you Anna. Now sleep.
He kissed her forehead as she closed her eyes and smiled.
BabieS!