Amanda's choice

by AmandaYoungFan

For years, she's done the Entity's bidding, thinking somehow, her doing so was also doing the bidding of the man she respected most, John Kramer. But seeing the survivors outside of the trial have made her question if what she's doing is right. What happens to a killer in the realm who no longer has the drive and stomach to do the Entity's bidding? (Feel free to comment)

44. The morning after

As the sun had rose the next morning, the rays had pulled Jake from sleep. There was no alarm clock in the realm, so when the sun woke you, it woke you. He looked out into the glare, wondering what time it actually was. He guessed around 8 a.m., or maybe 9 a.m. The watch he'd left at his bedside said it was 12:30 when he'd carefully picked it up and looked at the face, but again, it was not to be trusted.

Thankfully, the selection process for the trial, Jake and Amanda had discovered to their relief, did not select anyone that was still sleeping. For a long time, he'd worried about being pulled from bed and having to run and hide while still foggy with sleep and dressed only in his underwear...Or less. He hadn't been told by the Entity about the process, but after all these years, he'd figured it out on his own. It only started after at least four survivors had been awoken, and dressed. It occurred to him that if everyone stayed in bed and in their underwear, the trials may be on hold for awhile, but then he reasoned the Entity probably had a way around that.

He felt a weight pressing against his body and looked to his left. Amanda's head was pressed into his side and one arm hung loosely on his chest. Her hand was lightly clutching the cloth of his t-shirt. She was laying diagonally in the bed, one leg pointed out over the side. He smiled. Even in her sleep, she couldn't help but cling to him.

She was only in her underwear, and the sun's rays were dancing off of her tan, making her glow. If he hadn't known, it would be impossible to tell that only the night before, she'd been with Morrison. But then again, sex rarely left any visible evidence, and last night, Amanda had used everything short of acid and a blowtorch to clean him from her.

With Amanda being peacefully sleeping, He thought about it. He REALLY thought about it. He focused on that fact that his wife, even though she'd had his permission, had taken part in a physical affair. Last night, while of course it had been on his mind then, he hadn't been focused that deeply. After all, they'd both known with almost certainty that it was going to happen. And once she'd come through the door, his main focus had been working to calm her down, since the experience had clearly had an awful effect on her.

So he focused only on the events that had happened. He forced himself and thought about her and him together, and tried to form a mental image of it, as though he'd walked in on them in the middle, and had witnessed the event taking place with his own eyes, walking into Frank's cabin as he was laying on top of Amanda and doing what he had done.

And then, just to see if he could be, he tried to be angry about it. He tried to be jealous about it. He tried to convince himself that she'd lied last night. After all, she was manipulative, and certainly had the ability to be a first-class liar. He worked as hard as he could to try and make himself believe that she'd enjoyed it, and was looking forward to it happening again. He tried and tried and tried to build himself into a rage...And no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't. He looked at her still form, the way her head was pressed into his side, and felt no anger, just the sensation of love.

In no hurry to get out of bed, Jake just lain there. Careful not to wake her, he lowered the arm that was draped across the pillow above him until he could gently rest his hand on her bare shoulder. He wondered how he could feel no animosity. After all, her actions last night had been basically cheating on him. No matter the circumstances, even though she had been given his permission, she'd been with another man. It was physically an act of betrayal, even if it hadn't been one emotionally. Yet the way he felt about her had not changed.

Being analytical, and since there was nothing for him to do at present but lie there unless he wanted to wake her from her peaceful slumber, he instead allowed himself to enjoy the feel her body pressed to his, and think. He quickly answered the question in his mind why nothing was pissing him off about it. First and foremost was her demeanor when he'd first laid eyes on her after her return. She'd been angry and disgusted and unable to hide her shame. Her face virtually a mask of rage and disgust and hatred of herself. Her very first action had been to burn the clothing that she considered...Contaminated by Frank.

The second thing was her behavior in the bathroom. He couldn't see the items from her toiletry bag that she'd dumped on the floor, but knew they were there. When she'd later asked the Entity for that douche bag, he knew immediately that she'd been so desperately looking for the one of her own, and in her frustration at being unable to find it, she'd dumped the bag on the floor. He'd even heard her muttering, almost scared, that she didn't have one.

And of course...The third thing: She hadn't looked at him until he'd made her...Until she had finally been forced to meet his eyes. He wondered if she'd have looked at him on her own at any time once her douche bag had failed to appear. She might have just stared at the floor indefinitely until she'd found another solution to clean herself like she felt she needed to. But once he'd insisted she look at him anyway, and she'd finally listened, her immediate reaction had been to break down in complete shame. Amanda felt in that moment she'd completely betrayed him. She had been doing everything she could to clean herself of him to make up for the betrayal she'd felt she committed. And for several moments, he'd personally witnessed her actually being physically obsessed to feel she was clean of him before she even tried to summon the courage to face him.

So there it was. That's why even when he pictured them together, and tried to lie to himself that she secretly enjoyed it, he couldn't. Not at all. Her instinct after it was over was to physically feel like she was clean again. It was not an act, there was no way she could fake that level of desperation. And then later, when in the presence of the Entity, she'd still been thinking about being clean, knew the Entity could use its powers to deliver one, and quickly asked for it before it left. Every action pointed to one thing. Complete and total fear that somehow, Jake would hate her and think less of her for what she'd done, and panic and desperation to try to lessen the impact now that she was back home with him to look at her.

And even that had not been enough. The douche bag, the shower, hadn't even come close to finishing that job.

He'd counted. She'd used the thing five times and had been readying number six when he'd finally stopped her. If he hadn't, he knew she would have used it again and again, until she was raw and injured herself somehow, And it still would not have been enough. The only way she'd truly felt clean was after he'd made love to her. He'd known it then, he knew it now. She'd physically had to feel him inside of her before he could make her understand that nothing was different, and he did not think less of her, at all.

The old saying, actions speak louder than words, was truly correct about Amanda. No matter how much she improved and healed to feel better about herself, nothing would ever matter more than how Jake saw her, and looked at her, and felt about her. Jake's opinion of her was the only thing she cared about, the only thing that mattered, and it would be for as long as she was with him. He'd had to show her with his body what he had told her with his mouth. Once he had, the nagging things breaking his wife's psyche that night had finally been proven wrong and she'd finally believed that nothing between them had changed at all.

People looking at their relationship from the outside, if they could also see into it from the inside, might find themselves flabbergasted that she was still so often crippled by fear over losing him, especially when he'd made it so clear he loved everything about her. They'd be equally flabbergasted that Jake continued to ceaselessly hold her hand and reassure her, time and time again, that everything was fine and no she was never going to lose him; even if the current fear that had set her off was something they'd been over, time and time again before.

If they'd said so, he'd have told him to pound sand. Life had made her the way she was. Her fears were not merely irrational, not simply invented to torpedo her happiness, they were the fears of a woman who had gone from being alone and having absolutely nothing, to finding happiness and being given absolutely everything. Making acceptance even harder for her was the fact that she'd done what she'd done. In the real world, perhaps she could have sought counseling. She'd mentioned it a few times while they were in New York, and admitting she might need a touch of extra help, Jake knew was a strong admission. But they'd had to leave very quickly, and it was not available here.

Besides, Jake knew he would feel the same way himself had he been in her shoes instead of his own. She'd lied, she'd manipulated, she'd killed. Her regret and sacrificing herself weren't yet enough for her to accept that she'd made up for it. Pouring everything she could into being the perfect embodiment of the wife she'd always wanted to be still wasn't enough to quell her sometimes irrational fears that all her joy would suddenly be yanked from her in a moment. She maintained the belief that good things didn't happen to people that did what she'd done. Karma indicated they were supposed to die miserably, not be granted love, a marriage, and virtual immortality. She was of course grateful for him, for all of it, but it would take more time before she could accept the fact that something was suddenly going to steal everything she needed, loved, and wanted, and leave her with nothing but her depression and hatred of herself.

So fuck everyone else's opinion. He'd known since the moment he'd committed himself to her that he was going to have to work overtime to make her believe she deserved him. She'd given him every chance to simply write off their first sexual encounter as simply a meeting between two lonely people. In fact, knowing of how many people had used her for sex before, a pert of her probably believed that Jake would turn out to be exactly the same. But he never for a moment used her. Having her there with him that first night she was a survivor had filled him with complete joy. He'd decided then, and still believed now, that she was worth everything he was doing for her. She would not be where she was now without him. He said that not because he needed it to boost his ego, but simply because they both knew it was true.

Could she have found happiness with, say, David, or Adam, or Ash? Yes. But eventually, the self doubts would have fractured them, no matter how good the rest of the relationship was. She needed more than just a man who loved her. She needed a man who understood her, and had infinite patience and was willing to put in the hard work to make her believe that she could let her defenses down and allow herself to be happy and grateful. To convince her that karma was not going to swoop in and destroy her happiness once she finally allowed herself to believe it.

And again, despite what others may think, she'd grown by leaps and bounds. Most of the time, she was as happy as could be. Her mood swings were becoming less and less frequent and he knew she was accepting more and more that they would have and love each other, forever. Yes, last night's mood swing had been the lowest he'd seen her. She'd hated herself and her actions more than any other point in the time that they had spent together. But how could it not be? She'd physically done the worst thing she'd ever done in their marriage. It was the worst act a spouse could commit in general. Still, he'd helped her through it, and savored the fact that she was now completely at peace as she snuggled against him. Now that it was firmly behind them...How that he'd shown her with his body he needed her just as much as he had every other time they'd shared their bodies...He knew if she had any other lows from now until Frank's destruction, and she probably would, they would affect her far less than they had last night.

As he watched her, she shifted, and Jake had a moment to think she was waking up. But Amanda simply got further onto the bed, sliding over next to him, and raising her head from his side to rest upon his chest as she pressed herself against him. His lips broke into a wide grin. She was just the cutest little thing he'd ever seen. But just as quickly as it had seemed she would remain asleep, it seemed as though she finally sensed he was looking at her. Suddenly, her adorable little head lifted, turned, looked at him sleepily, and smiled.

"Hello, gorgeous," Jake said as he smiled back at her. Amanda had happily beamed brightly as she stared at him with her half-closed eyes.

Then she snuggled back into him, holding him tightly, sighing into his chest. "Let's not do anything today. Let's just stay in bed and take the day off." She raised the bottom of his t-shirt and ran a finger around his belly button.

"What about the trials?" Jake gently rubbed her bare shoulder. "They might need us in some of those today."

Amanda kept running her finger around his belly. "We'll just lose as fast as we can. You know sometimes there's dead weight in the team. Today is our day to be the dead weight, and when we die, we'll just be right back here in bed. It's a repayment for all the times I've virtually had to carry Quentin across the finish line."

He continued rubbing her shoulder, and she slowly ceased the movements of her finger and slid her body up next to his. And then, impulsively, she kissed him. Jake could feel the intensity...The relief, the love...It was no surprise at all, based on how well he knew her, that her reaction right now as as if she had gone to bed expecting to wake up alone, and when she opened her eyes to see he was still there, she was now finally so overwhelmed she couldn't help but move up to his face and show him her gratitude that he hadn't disappeared on her during the night with her lips.

She kissed him until she had to draw a gasping breath, then she settled her head next to his on her pillow. "How are you," Jake asked her. "I mean, really...Now...How are you? I knew what you needed before you could sleep. I needed it to. I'm assuming that those annoying thoughts and voices are currently quiet, especially now that you see that I'm still here, and still loving you, just like always?" He gave her a gentle smile.

She nodded. the tone of sincerity and care in his voice made Amanda's eyes wet. "Yes. I'm better. In fact, I'm better than better. After...I felt what you said in your body when it was connected with mine, I felt as wonderful as I did when you first told me you wanted me to be yours. You knew, as you always fucking do because you know me far better than I know myself, that I needed you more in that moment than any other time. I think even more than we were our honeymoon, and you know how special it was on our honeymoon...When it put the period on the ink on our marriage certificate. That's why you practically dragged me out of the shower...Because you looked at me and you knew the only thing was that would fix me. Last night...was using your body to heal me. REALLY heal me. And you did."

She brushed a strand of hair from his forehead. "I also want to apologize...For how I acted after. Last night...And I know this is going to sound completely crazy, but...Before I made the trip over the border last night, out of nowhere, I started hearing this voice in my head. It was like it was screaming at me, telling me bluntly what you tell me with your patience and care. It screamed at me that I was being stupid worrying that I was going to lose your love, and yes, it actually told me that you would end up making love to me like you did last night, because you knew me inside and out, and knew I'd need it, and it was right on every count. You've given me everything, and the only physical thing I have to give you in return is my body. The thought that what I did would make you want it less, and less, until you didn't want it at all, fucked me up, because if you no longer wanted my body, I felt like there was nothing I could physically give you at all. I'm not worried at all about that now. I was with another man, and yet after I came back I believe that we had the best sex we've ever had because we put everything we had into it. I know I did, and I felt you doing it to."

She rested her hand on top of his head. "Anyway, as that voice from nowhere screamed at me like a drill sergeant, I worked hard to believe it, and I did believe it more than I thought I would have. The only problem was that it's a long walk from their camp to here, and Claudette's description of her date wasn't enough to distract me from my negative thoughts. Pretty soon the only thing I was focused on was cleaning myself. When that didn't go as planned, well...You saw my mental shirt circuit in the bathroom. I don't know where the voice came from. Maybe it's the part of my mind that you and I have worked so hard to heal, and it's finally pissed off enough to scream at me until I quit listening to that other part of my mind that says I'm no good and don't deserve to be happy. I hope that voice keeps screaming, because even though it's rude, it's right. It yelled at me in the way I know you'd never have in you to do yourself even when I frustrate the fuck out of you."

Jake gently put his fingers her under her chin and held her face in place as he looked at her. "You have never frustrated the fuck out of me. Never. You remember our first night here. You were entirely blunt and warned me what to expect. I knew it would be hard to bring you out of the darkness because you felt it was where you belonged. I've fought to bring you to the light and give you the happiness and love I know you deserve. I've almost got you completely into the light, and I know you feel more and more each day that you really do deserve your happiness. I never regretted a single moment of it. You made me a proposal that night, you remember? If I wanted you, you were mine. And what did I say? I do. And I still do, and I always do.

"I know that now...AGAIN. Sometimes it must feel like you're married to an Alzheimer's patient because of how you constantly have to keep reminding me of the things that I already know in my heart." She sighed. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I let the negative part take over, even when the other part of me knew that it was irrational, and told me so. I'm sorry I acted like scared idiot, because, as that screaming voice told me, the only way you could have been any more supportive was if you held my fucking hand while Frank did it. I truly am listening to you, and I truly believe you, even if my actions sometimes say otherwise. You're so fucking patient with me it's beyond belief...And...Jake...I'm sorry that even after last night that I ever could have let myself believe that you'd ever think less of me for any reason, because you've never once made me feel that you ever have."

Jake stroked her hair and smiled. "Honestly, I'm glad you did break down. Normalizing it for the past week helped us both, but seeing you when you came back here, afraid to look at me, desperate to wash him off you... When you got here last night, you weren't thinking at all about what you needed to do to cope, and you were the one who physically had to do it. You were only focused on how I felt about it, and how you could fix it so it wouldn't bother me, if I was bothered. You put my feelings above your own. If that isn't love, Amanda, I don't know what is. I of course accept your apology. I was thinking while you slept about how you had talked in New York about counseling. I mean...You've been dealing with things and coping with things that would make a psychiatrist faint. You've had no one but me to help you get through him, and quite frankly, even though you break down from time to time, it's much less now than when we first started out. We've had no one but each other to work you through it, and I am truly proud of the progress you've made, not only with my support, but on your own. You're a fighter. And...I fucking love you."

She smiled. "That's my line. But I'll let it slide...Because this basket case you put a ring on fucking loves you too."

He pulled her in, giving her a brief kiss. "Even though you've been kicking yourself...Honestly, I feel like it needed to happen last night the way it did. We got through it like we always do. Next time, we both know now it'll be easier, because there will be a next time, in less than a week. And it'll happen, and then you'll come back here, and then you'll clean up the dirt, and then, just like I did last night, I'll carry you to the bed and give you the second best sex of your life, because I want to. Because I want YOU. I'm only promising second best because I don't think our emotions will be as high as they were last night when we had our best." They smiled at each other.

He gave her a gentle shove. "Now get up, lazy bones. After all the bitching you've done about the dead weight in your trials, you don't get a pass now. I think washing our bodies will lead to us needing to give each other a pick me up better than any cup of coffee, even Starbucks." He winked at her.

And so they got up. As they started the morning routine, nothing was different from all the morning routines that had come before it. It was absolute. Nothing between them had changed. Amanda fucking loved him, and Jake fucking loved her.

They'd showered together, and washed themselves, giggling. And as Jake had predicted before they'd gotten out of bed, the feeling of their hands on their most sensual areas had both quickly made them horny beyond belief. Amanda had been unable to take it anymore and had jumped into his arms, and thrown her head back under the hot water as Jake happily and pleasantly took her under the warm water. The feeling of his seed filling her as her pussy spasmed in ecstasy around his cock once again made her feel cleaner deep within herself than douching ever would have.

After they'd dressed, a sudden idea struck her. "Jake...I just thought of something." He spread his arms. "We've made Frank believe that you "punish me," but keep it controlled. Obviously we're both trying to get Frank to actually ask me to join Legion...Do you think he might do it faster if we make him believe the punishment has gotten physical, and make him believe that now you're physically hurting me, I'll be broken enough that he can safely recruit me faster?" Jake stared at her, and she could see his mind working the suggestion over. Amanda said, "Plus, if I actually had snuck out on you, it would certainly help sell the story next week if I show him a healing wound, because controlling Jake would certainly do more to me than stand me in a corner once he found out what I'd done. Knowing Frank, it would probably make his dick hard knowing that you hurt me after I was with him. "

Jake shrugged. "I mean, it's possible. I know we'd both like for this to be over sooner than later. Since you told him you snuck out on me, I can believe the version of me you created for your benefit would be pissed enough to physically hurt you. The only question is whether he's so big of an asshole that he'll keep putting it off because he enjoys screwing you and then sending you back to me with the thought that I'm going to keep making you physically suffer. I'm honestly 50/50. But we can at least try it once, and see what happens. The only question is, if you do have an injury, will it actually stay on you, or will you just automatically heal?"

Amanda pondered. She wasn't sure. Injuries after a trial would if they waited to sit by the fire. But what about something small and self-inflicted? Jake suddenly said, with a sharpness in his voice, "Oh...And no fucking way am I giving you the injury myself, not even if it's fake. I'd rather cut my hand off than hurt you, even if you asked me to."

She skipped over him smiling, and kissed him. "I was a cutter. I can do it myself. I've got an idea for the injury, It'll be awful, but manageable. I'll ask the Entity on my way to find the thing I'll need to injure myself if the injury will remain after. If it will, then I'll go through with it, you won't have to do it."

She had a brief conversation with the Entity, and smiled slightly that the being was as cordial as it could be when she reached out to it. Of course, they were helping it with its "oversight," but still, no matter how much it felt like it was becoming a friend, a small part of her would feel guilty at bothering the God with trivial questions, even if she WAS one of its favorite humans. She told it of her plans.

"Your assessment is correct. If you injured yourself, and relaxed at the fire, it would heal. However, I will frivolously use my considerable abilities to usurp what occurs naturally by the flames. Do you have a specific location in mind?"

Amanda thought for a moment. "How about the outside of my left thigh?"

There was a pause. "Done. Anything you do to yourself in that location of your body will heal in a natural way, rather than with the accelerated speed of the realm. Once everything has reached its satisfactory conclusion, I will remove what I have done and it will heal completely by the abilities of the other survivors, or the fire." Then, it sighed. "I find myself increasingly hopeful that one day in the future you will make a request that will provide me a true challenge to my abilities." The tone became lightly sarcastic. "Perhaps an alternate realm that the pair of you can use for, in the human vernacular, a summer home for you to store the automobile and the douche bag."

She grinned. "Don't worry. Someday...I'll completely surprise ya."

As the first trial of the day was starting, the Entity quickly bade her goodbye to focus its attention upon it. Her question answered, she opened the door and walked into Bill Oberbeck's deserted cabin and started looking around.

Bill only had one pack of cigarettes as far as she knew, and he always carried them with him, so when he left the realm, undoubtedly they had left with him. But he'd left a lighter behind, and it was possible that somewhere in this cabin, she might find a cigarette that had fallen from his pack, unnoticed and waiting to be found.

She searched the drawers, but they were empty. She looked and looked, under the bed, under the couch, anywhere she thought a dropped cigarette could have rolled. She found nothing. Bill had guarded his cigarettes seemingly as well as he'd guarded his troops.

She was about to rethink her plan when her eyes fell on a dirty glass jar on the shelf. She lifted it off and hit paydirt. She'd found Bill's "ashtray," and it was almost filled to the brim with butts he'd smoked from his never-ending pack of cigarettes. She dumped the jar on the table, and selected one that was only half-smoked. She scooped the rest back into the jar and stuck it back on the shelf. Even though the cabin was empty, she absently brushed the ashes and tobacco scraps off the table and onto the floor. No sense leaving behind a mess.

"Prize" in hand, she went back to her own cabin, and showed Jake the half-smoked butt before flopping on the couch. "Found exactly what I was looking for."

"You're sure you want to do this?" Jake walked over to the couch uncertainty, but he held the Bic in his hand.

"Fuck no," Amanda answered him honestly. "It's gonna fucking hurt like Hell. But if the pain cuts down the amount of time I have to spend with him before he officially breaks the rules so much that the punishment is the Entity getting rid of him, it will be fucking worth it."

She held the butt in her hand and Jake passed her the lighter. He said, almost angrily, "I'll tell you one thing...If "Jake" existed, and I met him, I'd cut his dick off myself. I can't stand abusers. Physical or otherwise. It's why I have grown to hate Morrison so much. He doesn't use his hands, but he is emotionally abusive. His manipulating you to serve his needs is abusive as hell."

She held the flame over the burnt end of the cigarette. Bill's brand wasn't a favorite of hers, but the smoke smelled positively divine, and she resisted the urge to take a long, satisfying drag. The precise location had been determined, somewhere that would be out of sight when she was dressed. As the end of the cigarette glowed red, she stood up and told Jake to slide her shorts and panties down. Taking a deep breath, she turned the cigarette in her fingers and pressed the red cherry into the outer skin of her left thigh.

She seized Jake's wrist with her free hand, squeezing it like a vice as her teeth clenched in pain. "FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUCCCCKKKKK!"

She sat down, retaining enough of her senses to stub out the cigarette butt on the floor, then fanning the burn with the air she generated from her waving hands. "No tight shorts for a few days," Amanda told Jake with a weak grin, and tears of pain in her eyes. Her teeth clenched as wave after wave of pain radiated off of the burn. It hurt more than the sacrifices in some ways. The pain of sacrifice was extreme, but was over quickly. Even though this burn was small, the pain radiating from it was ceaseless. She forced herself to let it go for as long as she could before wetting a washcloth in cold water and pressing it to it. It was the best she could do with no ice.

Jake looked at her with a heartbroken expression. "Why did you do it now instead of putting it off for longer?"

"I needed it to be now," She said, taking his hand. "You wouldn't have waited to punish me. By the time I go back, it'll look like I've had the burn for about a week. A fresh one wouldn't have been as believable. Now lets cross our fingers that it has the desired effect on him, because I'm gonna be really fucking pissed if I did this for nothing. Fuuuuuuuuck it hurts."

Jake dropped on the couch next to her and held her hand comfortingly until the pain finally became manageable enough for her to move around.

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For two days, Amanda had worn pants that did not chafe the burn on her thigh. After the second day, her usual tight shorts had left no major problems, only a slight twinge if the cloth rubbed the slowly healing burn in a particular way. The burn had managed to heal to a scabbed circle surrounded by a bright red ring by the time Claudette's date rolled around. She was relieved that it would be healed completely, and she wouldn't have a blemish. Now that the realm had removed the scars on her thighs from her cutting, she had grown to love her sexy, unblemished legs and wearing her short little shorts to show them off.

About an hour before the sun went down on Claudette's date night, as he had the last time. Jake made sure Frank got sloppy seconds. This time, their hot sex had been solely to get Frank's goat, and Amanda hadn't needed to feel him inside her to help her cope as she had last week. She truly believed that this would change nothing, and the pessimistic voices in her head remained totally silent. As she'd left, the two shared a long kiss. She'd closed the door behind her and Jake resumed reading his copy of "Jurassic Park."

Upon her arrival at the camp, Frank had been waiting expectantly for her on his familiar log. His grin to her, unseen by Joey and Claudette, was smug. After they left, she walked to her usual place by the fire, her braless breasts bouncing softly under the pink cropped tank top she wore. Jesus, I know I basically did it for drugs, but bouncing around like this...Now I really do feel like a fucking prostitute.

This time, he did not wait for an invitation. As soon as Joey and Claudette were out of eyesight and Amanda had settled against the log, he swooped in, sitting on the ground beside her, and immediately his manipulative lies started flowing. "I've done nothing but think about you all week. What happened between us...The filling of you with my healing energy...It was like a dream. Seeing you again reminds me it wasn't a dream, it was reality. You have no idea how special you've become to me, and to your sisters."

One thing was for sure. His dick had been like a steel bar all week waiting for her to come back. He'd jerked off to the memories of fucking her twice a day for the past week, and it had been almost as satisfying as being in her for real. He glanced at her, thinking, You're special to me alright, you were stupid enough to cheat with someone who will do even worse things to you than the asshole you married. But that's your own fault for being stupid like all women. You've believed every single fucking lie.

Shifting to a faux mode of protector, he looked her over. Her shoulders were hunched and tense, but she looked no worse for wear. Frank said, "It means so much...What we shared. It looks like you managed to settle the issue with your husband of sneaking out the last time."

Once again, Amanda used the trick of thinking of Jewelsysmooch to trigger a sudden rush of tears. She really did miss that cat.

As she started weeping, inwardly, Frank sighed. Now he was going to have to listen to her bitch and moan and pretend to care about whatever her asshole husband had done to her for her actions last week. She was still mobile, so it couldn't have been so fucking bad she needed to cry over it. Whatever it had been, at least it wasn't enough to scare her off. Was she a ticking cry bomb at home like she was here? Fuck...Her regular weeping fits would be grating, but not so much that he couldn't fuck her. And hopefully, once he did what else he needed to, she'd start losing this weak behavior and kill. Forcing a tone of concern into his voice, he asked her, "What happened?"

Amanda unbuttoned her shorts and slid them down. Frank first looked at her bikini panties, thinking of how he was going to rip them off her later and ram his duck in her pussy. Mmmm...So tight...Then his eyes were finally drawn to the circular, healing burn on her thigh. "What's that from?"

Hollowly, Amanda said, "He was smoking when I got back last night. He was yelling, I've never seen him so angry. Then...He made me pull my shorts down...And he put his cigarette out on me." Amanda scrunched her face in an expression of fear and horror to sell it as she buttoned her shorts again. She'd save Jewelsysmooch for more crying later. "I couldn't believe it. He said I'd crossed a huge line, the corner wasn't enough. I defied a direct order, he said. But then after...He said he felt guilty later. And to make up for it he said I could come tonight, and I did...So he must really feel guilty, right?"

As she had spoken in her halting, but hopeful tone, she had called on her memory of her mother. It was the same tone in her mother's voice when she told her daddy would be better tomorrow...Before it had changed from hopefulness to helplessness as she realized they were both trapped in Hell with her father.

And, thanks to experience, the lie about Jake feeling guilty would also suffice. After all, had gotten a gift after every blow the next day. Instead of a trip for ice cream like her father had done, Jake would have believably let her return here as she wanted...An easy, simply gift.

Frank had left her sitting quietly as he worked out how to play it. It was a good wedge, and he decided to drive it in further. "I don't know, Amanda," he lied. "If he did it once, then the line is crossed, and now he knows he can do it and get away with it. He's being nice now, but you know his true colors will show again. He might be sitting back at your cabin right now planning to put out his next cigarette on your other leg."

Thank you, Jake. Frank thought. Fuck, this was perfect. He wouldn't have to pussy-foot around. He could take things to the next step. He wanted her for his personal sex toy, absolutely. But now he could use it to unleash the killer inside of her that he knew simply needed his gentle, manipulative push, to bring out of her. He couldn't wait to fuck her, that was a given, and mattered the most. But being able to bring her to Legion and once again use her skills to make them a perfectly-running kill squad, and make up for Joey's failings, was a close second. Instead of carefully re-awakening her killer instincts, he could convince her to tap into them immediately, for revenge against what Jake had done to her.

"But you...Amanda?" She was staring at the flames. "Amanda. Look at me." She looked at him. "You have the ability, you know that, right? The ability to make him pay. You have the ability to make sure he never hurts you again. You were a killer once. Yes you had second thoughts and guilt, and yes, you thought falling in love with a seemingly-nice survivor was the way to go, but I think you see now that was a mistake. You see now that he doesn't love you. I love you, Amanda. I understand you in the ways that he doesn't. If you have the support of someone who understands you as a killer, and who loves you even when you kill, like I would, you could find your calling again. You said you're not really friends with them, right? So if you go back to killing them, it's no real problem, is it?"

Amanda shifted her eyes around, pretending to think. In actuality, she wanted to jump up and down and scream. the wound worked. he was finally accelerating his plans and openly talking about making her a killer again. The next step would be to ask her to join Legion, she was sure of it.

Frank moved in for what he thought was the kill. It was time to make himself look further like a hero, and Jake a villain. Once she gave herself to him completely, he could treat her like dogshit and make her love it.

"And...If you re-learned...You'd see him in the trials. You could make him pay for what he did to you in them. Sacrifice him. Mori him...Make him scream in fear of you. You screamed in pain when he did that to your leg, right?" Amanda nodded. "'Wouldn't you like to hear him scream in pain like you did in a trial with him?."

Frank saw it got her thinking again. Good. But fuck, he could see in her eyes some stupid little shitty thing was holding her back.

Amanda said, "But...Even if the others aren't really close to me...Do they deserve for me to go back to murdering them? We're not best friends, but they're all kinda nice to me."

Frank finally got exasperated and he grabbed her by her shoulders and yelled in her face, "Do you think they would if they knew you were trailer trash like Jake does? No fucking way! They'd think you were garbage. They'd think you didn't belong with them! They'd look at you the same way everyone else does when they see trash. They only put up with you now because you dress hot, and seem like one of them, that's the ONLY reason! These fuckers are all cattle to be slaughtered. They deserve to be slaughtered, and we deserve the ability to kill them over and over again! I know I've earned it."

Amanda pulled herself bodily from his hands and cowered away from him, covering her face with her hands. FUCK. What the FUCK are you doing, Frank? "I'm not mad at you," Frank said, gently rubbing her shoulder. I'm...Just trying...I'm desperate to make you see...I need you to see that me and Julie and Susie are the only ones that care about you. I can put you on the top of the food chain again. I can help you relearn the way to make Jake pay for that burn on your leg. I can help you learn how to kill him, over and over again, and the rest of them, for not being able to appreciate you the way you are. They all deserve to pay, Amanda. Every last one of them."

Fuck Frank, kid gloves. She doesn't want to flee one screaming asshole to share a bed with another one. You can lose your temper with her after you've got her ass trapped in your camp, if need be. But by then she should be pliable enough to command her without even raising your voice. He put his arm around her. She stopped cowering a little. He's smoothed the waters once again.

She sat there for a moment, letting him hold her. "I don't know how I'd even start," she finally said.

Gotcha. Frank relaxed entirely. He couldn't even remember what had first made him realize her capabilities. His arrogant mind was so flabbergasted that she'd gotten the drop on him that he'd forgotten about it entirely. He did remember the casual way she'd sliced the branch off of the log, however.

"You have that knife on your wrist for a reason. You just need someone to remind you how to use it on people instead of trees. That person...Is me. And then you need punish your hubby for ruining your life. As you Mori him, you can think about all the times he stood you in the corner. You can think of this abuse, and the way he was going to abuse you in the future. And you can punish the rest of them for only being nice to you because they don't know you came from a trailer. You can make them pay, all of them. You'll be my killer queen. You're going to live with me in my cabin. We'll sleep in the same bed. In between making them suffer, I'll heal you with my energy over and over again. Day, night...You want that don't you?"

Come on Amanda. Say yes. Be a dumb cunt like I know you are. Come on. Now that I see that wound, I don't want to wait anymore. I want you here, killing for me and taking my cock every time I spread your sexy whore legs.

She looked at him for the first time since she'd arrived, she smiled. "I do want that...I can try to let you...Teach me again, I hope I can learn quickly, and make you happy."

Frank's dick swelled at her smile and the look in her eyes. It was cold, calculating, and evil. "We're gonna start right now. We'll see how happy you make me. Then after, I'll bring you back here...And fill you with my healing energy again, to celebrate. Wait for me." He went into Julie and Susie's cabin.

More healing energy and disgusting spunk. Oh fucking joy."

She pushed the thought from her mind. As she enjoyed being blessedly alone, Amanda felt increasingly satisfied. He hadn't asked her officially to join Legion yet, but he WAS going to train her now. It may not have been necessary the last time, but it might be again, and now she was going to get him to commit his first removable act. If she played this right...If she pleased him enough in this stupid training...And if she...Ugh...Let him fuck her again...He might throw in the invitation to Legion as well. Frank then would have physically done everything the Entity was prepped to punish and remove him for. Frank would no longer exist in the realm by the end of Claudette's next date.

Her victory celebration may have been a bit less enthusiastic had she known then that Frank had one final, painful, experience to leave her with later.

Frank returned with a small bundle in his hand. He snapped his fingers, and Amanda hid her flash of anger as she followed him into his cabin. She was getting really fucking sick and tired of being ordered around like a fucking dog. He watched her body, drooling, as she stripped to her panties and slipped on what was in his hand, a dark hoodie, dark pants, and a mask, entirely black. Frank told her they were Julie's. The clothes were a decent fit, and the black pair of sneakers Amanda slipped on her feet were only lightly snug. Julie's shoe size was apparently one smaller than Amanda's own.

Frank looked at her, dressed in black, the hoodie pulled up over her head, mask on her face, and smiled. "It's like it was meant to be. Your slashing is good, just do to people what you did to that branch on the log. What I want to focus on tonight is how well you stalk. If you pick that up easily, well...I might have an invitation for you before you leave this camp tonight." Frank winked.

Amanda's eagerness to let Frank hang himself was tempered by his order. Who was there to stalk? Frank? Amanda decided to be bold, with a dreamy quality to her voice. "But who? There's no trial."

Frank smiled again. "Claudette is out in those woods. Stalk her, scare her, but not enough that she runs back to your camp. We don't want to give the game away tonight. Just...Threaten her a little and make her a little less sure of herself when she's out in our woods."

Amanda was uncertain. "But she and Joey are on a date, and out of all the survivors, she's one of the few I'm kind of close to. I mean...I'm not sure if she's the right person to..."

A cloud passed over Frank's face. It took every ounce of his willpower not to snap at her again. This was the second time she'd questioned him. He took a breath. No yelling. He was a master at manipulation. Think, Frank.

"I don't know how to tell you this. I should have told you from the beginning, but...I hesitated, because I didn't want to make you worry. Joey is...A bit of a player, to be honest. He seems to be doing alright with Claudette, and this will be...A sort of test to see his devotion to her. If he cares for her, he'll defend her if someone is stalking her, right?"

"Well...I mean...I guess so," Amanda replied outwardly. Inwardly, she thought, Frank. You mother fucking asshole.

"She's lonely, isn't she? Claudette. I mean, she's dating a killer. Does she not fraternize with anyone else besides you in the survivor camp? I mean, if she's desperate, and hurting, it would be understandable that she might fall for Joey's charms, you know? This will give us a chance to see if Joey's got good intentions with her."

Amanda gritted her teeth at the rage. The motherfucker had the gall to suggest Joey was the fucking prick here. Aloud, she said, "She does kind of keep to herself. She's a bit naïve. I trust you, Frank. I'll do it."

Frank smiled. He'd kept his calm and gotten what he wanted. "Hmm. Does she hurt? Claudette? Is that why she keeps to herself?"

Amanda shrugged. "I mean I'm closer to her than the others, but not best friends...It might be so. She hurts from something."

"Do you think she could benefit from my healing power the way you have?"

Her body tensed. She almost gave the game away. RIP HIS FUCKING BALLS OFF AMANDA. DO IT! She clenched her teeth in fury behind the mask as she sloooooooowly got herself back under control. Oh no. This motherfucker was NOT suggesting right in front of her that he wanted to fuck Claudette too. Nuh uh. No way.

"I'm not sure," Amanda said, hesitatingly.

"Well, maybe we'll find out. I love to heal, Amanda. If her relationship fractures, she'll be hurting. Obviously she's not tough enough to be Legion...But maybe you can help me help her. Tell her about my abilities if she hurts. Help her come to me and help me heal her. You want to help me, do that for her, don't you? You want her to feel the energy and healing I made you feel, right?"

WINGMAN? Now he was trying to get her to play fucking WINGMAN TOO? Can this motherfucker be any more low? Christ he makes Hoffman look like fucking Santa Claus. I can't believe I'm even thinking this but if it was a choice completely between these two, I'd fuck Hoffman instead. Fuck that is so wrooooooong. Again, she slooooowly tempered her rage.

"Of course I do, Frank. You've healed me. I want to help you. Tell me what to do and I'll do it for you," Amanda actually felt something like bile in the back of her throat and had to swallow it down. Claudette. Fucking innocent, sweet Claudette.

"I knew I could count on you. We'll make those plans later. Right now, I'm ready to see you move, killer queen."

Amanda really hated that motherfucking nickname too. Thanks a lot for it...Cunt Face.

He swept her in his arms and kissed her and Amanda had to swallow the fucking bile again. "Time for your training. Let's go." He gave her ass a slight smack and walked out ahead of her.

As she followed him, Amanda wondered if she should forget about the necklace. She would still cut his dick off, but now she wanted to stuff it up his asshole.

She followed Frank out the door and into the woods. Amanda slipped in the familiar crouch she'd once used as the Pig. It felt dirty. It felt WRONG. She hated the way it felt, and she hated the memories it brought up. She had never wanted to do it again. Even faking it was difficult to deal with. She couldn't think of any way being the Pig might even feel remotely comfortable, unless she was the pig while she was cutting off Frank's dick.

After looking in the darkness for about five minutes, Frank had finally spotted Claudette and Joey kissing by a tree. A flashlight was weakly illuminating them from where she'd laid it on the ground.

He felt a flash of anger. As the weeks had passed, and they'd been growing closer and closer together, Frank had been getting more and more resentful that Joey had found himself a girlfriend. He'd savored having both the girls to himself while Joey pounded his pud alone. He'd been pleased to make Joey listen as he fucked his former girlfriend. He was the leader. The girls served him, and Joey served him also, never once complaining about Susie's sexual noises in the night...and the morning...Noon...The afternoon...Early evening...

When Joey had said Claudette was coming over the first time, Frank had put up a fight over it, but really, he'd wanted it to happen. Frank had already been thinking of ways to bag her, before Amanda and her perfect looks distracted him. His hostility had made Claudette bring her along. He'd definitely made the right choice focusing purely on Amanda, but now that she was almost his, he could go back to his original plan. He would fuck Claudette and ruin her relationship with Joey, with the dumb cunt Amanda's help. He'd have his cake and eat their pussies too.

If Claudette started thinking Joey couldn't protect her when she came over, Frank knew he could convince her HE could, and she'd start getting closer to him for Frank's protection and use mental games on her he'd used on Amanda. She'd give in even faster than amanda did. Then he could give her a dose of his cum before he sent her back to her camp for good. She wasn't as hot as Amanda, but manipulating the goody two-shoes into his bed, even once, would be good for kicks. He could lord it over her in the trial. Once Frank boned her, Joey wouldn't be able to keep dating her. He wouldn't be able to stop thinking about her and Frank. And Frank would tell him it had been a test. See Joey? You couldn't trust her, she was unfaithful. I did you a favor. And eventually, Frank knew, Joey would fall in line.

Claudette would be hesitant, of course, after all, she barely knew Frank. But she was friends with Amanda. If he used that friendship and had Amanda lie for him about his abilities, Claudette would trust her enough to try. Amanda is your friend, he'd tell her, and she trusts me enough to move to my camp. You can trust me too, Claudette. Let me show you how I healed Amanda...She'd buy it, eventually. If she didn't, well...One night when she came over, he'd just grab her and take her anyway. Joey believed Frank's every word. He'd never believe Claudette if she told him Frank had taken her against her will. He'd claim she was trying to drive a wedge between him and Frank, and still send her packing. It was perfect, like every one of his plans.

He snapped his fingers and pointed. Amanda, ever dutiful, slipped towards the kissing couple in her crouch. He found himself surprised she moved so fast in a crouch. It was definitely a different stalking method than the quick jogs he and the other Legions did. But if that was what she knew, fuck it. If it worked like he wanted, she could crouch a whole fucking match as long as she four killed for him. He wondered if heartbeats could start up outside a trial, because Amanda was getting closer and closer and Claudette wasn't noticing at all. Was that why Amanda was in the crouch? He'd find out soon enough. He guessed though that it was working because they were outside a trial. No way Amanda had an ability to crouch stalk a survivor in a trial without triggering their heartbeat. If anyone was gonna get that ability, it would be him.

Claudette's heartbeat may not have increased, but Amanda's own heart was beating in her chest. Fuck I don't want to do this fuck I don't want to do this FUCK I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS.

Because she was in the crouch, Amanda knew, she was virtually undetectable inside and outside of a trial. In the darkness, she was able to get right next to them. Thankfully, the familiar pig mask had been replaced by this mask that was entirely black, so she wouldn't be as recognizable, but...She still felt about as shitty as she possibly could in that moment, stalking the most innocent survivor in the camp and while she was on a fucking date no less. Frank hadn't told her to attack, so she just stayed there in her crouch, virtually right on top of them, and waited to be spotted.

Claudette opened her eyes as she'd been kissing Joey, and before long, they eventually dropped to the crouched figure of Amanda, lit up in the weak glow of her flashlight. Her mind took a moment to register that there was a KILLER right next to them. She let out a hitching breath, screamed, and ran. Amanda quickly darted out of sight before Joey turned to see what she was looking at. He looked in the direction Claudette had run and shouted after her, "Claudette? Claudette! Wait!" And then he followed after her.

Frank, watching the whole thing, couldn't believe it. FUCK. Amanda could have literally stabbed her to death before Claudette even knew she was there. Her stealth abilities were far beyond his expectations. With her in Legion, even if she covered half the distance she had in a trial, they truly would be the most powerful killers in the realm. She'd get them a ton of kills, and as the leader, Frank would get all the credit. He deserved it anyway, after all, she wouldn't be there if he hadn't busted his ass recruiting her.

He'd thought it would take more time. He thought that she'd be rusty. But in less than a few minutes, she'd done exactly what he'd ordered her too. Perfectly, and precisely. Every one of his commands followed to the letter. Claudette would be scared, but not too scared to return to the realm, and Frank could start working on her. After all, Amanda could "protect" her since she'd be initiated into Legion. He sighed. Ahhh, Amanda. She'd made him happy beyond all of his expectations. Now it was time to return to his cabin and let her please him again.

But as the minutes ticked by and he stood there, he was getting less and less pleased. Where had the stupid fucking cunt gone? What was taking her so fucking long? He glared at the ground in his irritation and then, if he'd been capable, he would have pissed his pants.

SHE WAS RIGHT THERE.

Somehow, she'd crept from where he'd last seen her, and had made her way back to him and been in a crouch beside him for he didn't know how fucking long, He'd not seen her at all. He'd completely missed her. Jesus fucking Christ why couldn't he have seduced her and brought her to Legion ages ago? She was a perfect fuck, and he'd make her into a perfect killer.

Behind her mask, Amanda smiled knowing that she'd scared the fucking shit out of him.

Frank caught his breath, and not wanting to give her too much praise, said, "Pretty good, Amanda. There's definitely a lot of potential in you. You have satisfied me enough to heal you." He snapped his fingers. "Come."

The darkness, and the mask, hid Amanda's face as she silently mouthed fuck you Frank in a litany. Frank walked ahead of her and led her through the woods.