Harry did not attend the rest of his classes that day. Wanting to get away from everything he ventured to a place he had only needed occasionally this year, a deep window alcove in the Astronomy Tower that overlooked the grounds. There he sat under his invisibility cloak, a repelling charm keeping away other students like him who might be looking for some peace and quiet.

It was there he stayed for the rest of the day, head resting against the windowpane. The weather was mild and clear, allowing him to look down at the grounds all the way to Hagrid's hut, to watch the little dotted figures of students going to and from the Greenhouses. He moved as little as possible, his stomach muscles and the back of his legs aching from the curse Malfoy had used on him, as did his face though he bore no visible mark of what had been done...but he was trying to forget about that.

The duel with Malfoy was insignificant. It was of no consequence to him. He didn't care about what happened, nor Umbridge's blatant efforts to set up him and suspend him. But as much as he told himself he didn't care about it, nor could he face it. Snape, Malfoy, Umbridge, his schoolwork and McGonagall's warning about his exams...it was too much to comprehend in one day.

Harry understood himself enough to know he was in no state to find Ron and Hermione, that simply going about the rest of his day was no longer an option. It felt like he was precariously balanced on a knife's edge, frozen as he waited for the wind to make him fall one way or the other. That he had shouted at Professor McGonagall was enough of a sign that he had completely lost the plot. And so instead he stayed in that alcove, hiding from his problems until he was ready to face them, whenever that might be.

Every now and then he dozed, catching up on a little sleep from the night before, but for the most part he was looking down to the grounds. He could see small dotted shapes of people, and keeping track of the time he knew Ron and Hermione would be among those heading down for Care of Magical Creatures. He felt bad about skipping out on Hagrid, he'd never missed a single one of his lessons before.

Somehow the entire day flew by, Harry completely at a loss as to how the hours passed. Students had been coming and going from classes all day, but he hadn't paid them any attention. His mind felt completely apathetic, and though it occurred to him this state was likely what Snape had been pushing him to achieve he didn't give it much care.

It seemed that someone had alerted Sirius about what was going on. Late in the afternoon he had heard his godfather repeatedly calling for him through the mirror, each time increasingly anxious to reach him. Any other time Harry would have answered him as quickly as possible, particularly if he had reached out more than once, but today he did not. He couldn't stand to hear another lecture, to hear someone else talking about the state of his grades, or worse, trying to force him back to Occlumency.

Naturally, McGonagall was looking for him too. Three times now a Hogwarts ghost had passed by, and he had heard them murmuring his name, no doubt set onto the task of tracking him down. But he made every effort to conceal himself. He stayed exactly as he was, moving only to cast a warming charm when he felt the cold coming in through the window pane. It was only that and the setting sun that gave him any indication of the late hour, but even when he stomach clenched in hunger he felt no motivation to go down to dinner.

He didn't know what he was supposed to do . All he knew was that he couldn't face anyone right now, not even Ron and Hermione.

But as time ticked onward he grew stressed again. He need to figure out what was going to happen next. One way or another he would have to front up to McGonagall, to apologise and face whatever punishment she deemed fit. But as for actually doing that, actually facing...everything...well, he didn't have much in the way of a plan.

The only thing he could bring himself to genuinely consider was going down to see Hagrid, trusting that even at this late hour he wouldn't be turned away. If he was lucky Hagrid might even let him spend the night, but first he just had to figure out what to say to him, how to explain what was happening without making him upset. And so he delayed and delayed, because no matter how much he wanted to do down there he couldn't stand to see Hagrid worried about him.

It was pushing on to eight o'clock in the evening, and Harry still had no intention of vacating his place to head back to Gryffindor Tower. He didn't know what he was going to do, if he would stay here all night, but the choice was taken from him. The grand stairwell of the Astronomy had been cloaked in near darkness until the approaching glow of light caught Harry's attention.

He looked up, gripping his wand and bracing himself to dispel anyone who might have come looking for him. There were still some decoy detonators in his bag, but any use of those to distract or scare away someone would only give away his position. Yet in a strange way it was almost a relief, as though he had been too frozen to make a decision until it was forced on him.

Professor McGonagall was making her way up the circular staircase, a lantern levitated by her side that followed her. From beneath the invisibility cloak he watched her coming, and he held his breath when she stopped on a landing below and looked around.

'Potter?'

In the hope that she would move on he remained silent and still, but she was not to be fooled. Somehow she had found him.

'Potter, please come out. I know you're here somewhere.'

Unless she had reached incandescent levels of fury he sensed there wasn't a reprimand coming. She was stern faced, but she didn't seem angry, and this was the only reason he revealed himself. He wasn't ready to face her, but he pulled the invisibility cloak off and stepped out from the alcove. His limbs ached as he moved from the position he had occupied for hours, and moving felt strange and unfamiliar.

Upon seeing him McGonagall's face was alight with relief, and she closed her eyes as if sending a prayer of thanks to Merlin. Raising her hand she gestured for him to come down to her and then waited patiently while he dragged his feet. When he stood in front of her it felt just like before, him sitting across from her right before things had gone to hell. He wished he could avoid looking her in the eye, not wanting to see the disappointment in her eyes, and yet he forced himself to show her that much respect.

'Harry,' she began gently. He noted the use of his given name, which was unusual for her. 'I come to know all of my students quite well, and that includes you too. Well enough to expect that you would never speak to me the way you did today were you in your right mind.'

There was a pause as he stood there in silence, wondering if she was expecting an apology. He waited in apprehension for the lecture to begin. He would apologise, he would take any punishment...he just wanted it over.

'So clearly, you are not in your right mind,' McGonagall stated, holding his gaze. She cleared her throat, her expression softening before she continued. 'You will be returning to Grimmauld Place for the remainder of the week. You will take this time to collect your thoughts, and you will return to Hogwarts Sunday evening. Then you will resume all of your classes as of Monday morning.'

Harry stared at her, speechless. Confusion swept his thoughts as he tried to understand what she had just said. Grimmauld Place. He was going to Grimmauld Place.

The news should have flooded him with relief. He should have been whooping and cheering on the inside, for the prospect of getting out of Hogwarts had always seemed too good to be true. But now it was actually happening he felt nothing. He felt numb to anything McGonagall had just told him, even resuming Occlumency next Monday.

Harry looked away and then nodded silently.

McGonagall's body language relaxed, having expected him to argue with her. 'Go to your dormitory and pack belongings for the rest of the week. Say goodbye to your friends, and meet me in the Entrance Hall in precisely thirty minutes. Is that enough time?'

He nodded again then turned away, going back up a few steps to collect his things. Stuffing his cloak back into his bag he slung it over his shoulder and left, still avoiding McGonagall's eye as he passed her. Walking quickly he made his way through the dark castle, passing by only one other student hurrying to the library before curfew.

It seemed too good to be true…Grimmauld Place. He was getting away from here. He was going to see Sirius.

When he entered Gryffindor Tower he immediately found Ron and Hermione, who had chosen seats nearest the Fat Lady's portrait in anticipation of his eventual return. They both lurched to their feet when they saw him arrive, but they tried not to create a scene even though they'd been worried out of their minds all day. Seeing their concern Harry gestured to the staircase, allowing them both to follow him up to the boys dormitory.

'Harry, we were so worried,' Hermione moaned as soon as they were alone in the dormitory. 'You just disappeared after Transfiguration.'

'We went looking for you,' Ron added, looking at him warily. 'What happened with McGonagall?'

Dumping his schoolbag on his bed he tried to think of where to start…but how could he describe how badly things had spun out of control? Where would he even start?

'I think I've been suspended.'

Ron and Hermione looked perplexed, glancing at one another. 'Not because of Umbridge, surely?'

Harry shook his head, having momentarily forgotten about Umbridge's attempt to suspend him. At least she'd be pleased.

'I got into a row with McGonagall. She's sending me to Grimmauld Place for the rest of the week. I have to be back by Monday.'

'She's not mad at you,' Ron mused, thinking out loud. 'If she's suspending you she's probably trying to do you a favour.'

'Grimmauld Place?' Hermione confirmed. 'She's probably going to have Sirius talk to you about Occlumency.'

Harry nodded in agreement, seeing the inevitable connection. 'I don't even care,' he said, opening his trunk and taking a handful of clothing. 'I just want to get out of here.'

There was a heavy silence as he started to pack his things, tossing the Marauders Map onto Ron's bedside table for him to use. They would have better use of it while he was gone. He could feel his friends watching him as he packed, but he couldn't bring himself to offer them any reassurances that he was okay…he wasn't okay, that much he was starting to see clearly.

'What should we tell people?' Hermione quietly asked.

'Dunno,' he muttered, deliberating over which of his school books to take. He settled on taking all of them, knowing he couldn't afford to get any more behind. On a whim he included the half dozen books Scrimgeour had loaned him. 'Tell them I'm at St Mungos, having that shock treatment they all told me to get.'

'Don't say that,' Hermione said, beginning to sound tearful. 'We're going to miss you.'

'Well, you shouldn't,' he said sharply, casting a weightless charm onto his bag and slinging it over his shoulder. He turned to face them both, wishing they didn't look as miserable as he felt. 'You'll have an easier time without me around.'

'Don't say that either!'

'Yeah,' Ron agreed, he too sounding disheartened. 'We don't care how many people we have to tell to fuck off.'

Appreciating the sentiment Harry just nodded. There was no way around it, they were better off without him right now, but they refused to say it. Their support had never wavered.

'I should go. McGonagall's waiting for me.'

Hermione became teary eyed as she hugged him goodbye, forcing him to offer empty reassurances that he was alright, that he was going to be fine after a few days to clear his head. It was the same reassurance he had to offer Ron too, who hugged him tighter and longer than expected. Confident it would only be a few days he reminded them of this before making his way down from the dormitory.

He left them in Gryffindor Tower, declining their suggestion of coming down to the Entrance Hall with him. He preferred to go alone, and he felt an unusual sense of peace coming over him as he traipsed the darkened corridors as he had done many a night before. There was no one else around, the portraits didn't bother him, and he was on his way out of there, finally.

The Entrance Hall was empty when he arrived, and so he sat down on the steps and waited. Conscious of exactly where he was he looked to his left over the balustrade, down to the area where Cedric's memorial had been erected last June. At the time it had been overflowing with tributes and flowers, but by the time the new school year began it was gone, leaving in its place what seemed like a gaping chasm.

Looking away from it he rested his head against the balustrade and waited for McGonagall. They travelled to London by Knight Bus, and judging by the efficiency of their journey he got the feeling the Order had made prior arrangements with Stan and Ernie. Harry and McGonagall were the only people on board and they travelled together in silence, but strangely it was a comfortable silence. Neither of them felt the need to make small talk or discuss his earlier outburst, for which he was immensely grateful.

With a loud bang they found themselves in central London, Ernie squeezing the triple decker bus through the night traffic. As they travelled through the city Harry stared out the window at the busy streets, the pavement filled with people despite the hour, coffee shops and pubs open late. He watched on in interest, envying the Muggles who were going about their lives with no idea of what was happening in their country. He longed to be like one of them, oblivious to everything.

The Knight Bus came to a screeching stop, delivering them a few blocks away from Grimmauld Place where Mad-Eye met them on the pavement. He gave them a short greeting before ushering them to keep moving, and so Harry and McGonagall bundled themselves in their cloaks as they set off, and the Knight Bus disappeared with another loud bang. As they walked the dark pavement Harry looked over his shoulder, observing Mad-Eye who stayed back a bit before following.

The shadowy street revealed more people, a dark figure across the road watching them, another looking out from a nearby window. He was not concerned by their presence, trusting that even if those people weren't Order members in disguise he and McGonagall were perfectly safe. When they arrived at Grimmauld Place they were met by Kingsley Shacklebolt waiting on the stoop.

'Minerva. Harry,' he greeted them both. 'Any trouble?'

'None at all,' McGonagall assured him. 'Very smooth journey.'

Without further delay Kingsley opened the door for them, and McGonagall ushered Harry inside first. The entrance hall was as gloomy and poorly lit as usual, Harry paying it little attention as he set down his bag and began shrugging off his cloak. But when he looked up he froze in confusion, wondering if somehow they had managed to enter the wrong house. Behind him McGonagall had just closed the door and she too stopped in her tracks, giving a small gasp of surprise.

The entrance hall looked like the site of a demolition, and it was readily apparent how Sirius had been occupying his time lately. The portrait of Mrs Black was gone, as was nearly the entire wall to which she had been affixed, leaving only bare bricks peeking through crumbling plaster. The hallway wallpaper had been stripped clean off and the carpet ripped up, leaving the hallway and reception room with nothing but bare floorboards and crumbling plaster walls.

Harry looked around in astonishment, taking note that the wall sconces and even the door handles had been removed - but there was something else that really caught his attention. In the middle of the hallway floor was an enormous hole, and as if drawn to it he moved forward to better see. Quick as a whip McGonagall seized him by the back of his collar, not letting him get any closer.

'Sweet Merlin,' McGonagall murmured faintly, hand over her mouth as she began to question whether or not she had done the right thing in bringing him here.

The sound of footsteps pre-empted Sirius's arrival, and he quickly appeared at the top of the basement stairs and hurried towards them. Dust bloomed from the bare timber boards as he walked, and he gave his bark-like laugh when he saw McGonagall clutching Harry by the collar.

'It's fine, Minerva,' he assured her, confidently walking straight over the hole as if it wasn't there. 'It's charmed.'

McGonagall tentatively released him, allowing Harry to go closer to the hole and peer down into the basement kitchen below, and then up at the ceiling where there was a matching hole. His curiosity only temporarily abated he turned to Sirius who had put his hand on his shoulder, and he wondered how much he knew. His godfather was going to expect an explanation as to what was going on…but he didn't know where to start. How was he supposed to explain?

'Thanks for getting him here. Any trouble?'

'None at all,' McGonagall assured him, looking more comfortable with leaving him here now. She gave Harry a rather formal nod. 'I'll make arrangements for your return to Hogwarts on Sunday evening.'

'Thank you, Professor,' he said sincerely. It was for more than just getting him here, but for her understanding…he had needed this desperately, and she recognised it.

Sirius saw her out and then waited in the doorway until she summoned the Knight Bus, returning only when she was safely on board. As he waited Harry continued looked around the bare entrance hall, peering into the dark reception room that was empty of all furniture.

'Sorry about the state of the place,' Sirius said lightly, closing the door and replacing all of the security charms. 'Wasn't expecting anyone other than the usual crowd.'

Harry nodded, swallowing around a hard lump in his throat. He kept looking around, trying to feign interest, but all he could feel was Sirius's gaze, and so he forced himself to meet his eye. Seeing his godfather there in the flesh felt strange and foreign, like he was in a dream from which he would soon wake up. There was a long pause as the two of them considered one another, and Harry dreaded that he would have to speak first…he wasn't sure what to say.

'How much trouble am I in?'

Sirius's expression softened. 'You're not in trouble,' he said, studying him. 'McGonagall says you're in a bad state. I'm inclined to agree with her.'

This simple acknowledgement just about did him in. Hearing someone else say it so plainly, a statement of fact…it immediately felt truer than it had before. Harry nodded his head. Yes. He was in a bad state.

To his relief he didn't need to say anything, for Sirius quickly embraced him. Winding his arms around Harry's shoulders he pulled him close, and Harry sank into him, not knowing until right now that this was what he needed. It wasn't the quick one armed hug they exchanged when he left after Christmas, when neither of them were in a good mood after news of his Occlumency lessons, but more. Closing his eyes he rested his head against Sirius's shoulder, relaxing into the embrace.

When Sirius didn't let him go he was glad, and his eyes were burning as emotion welled up inside him, and when the first tear fell more followed. After months of forcing himself to hold it all back he could do it no longer, and he readily let go of his tightly held control, feeling like it was finally the right time. It wasn't the kind of embarrassing scene he might have dreaded, and so he didn't try to stop himself, but instead was grateful it was all coming out.

Having maybe expected this Sirius didn't seem taken aback, and he waited patiently as he allowed Harry to let his guard down. As the lump in his throat eased and he quietened he began to feel a sense of peace, and though he knew it would be short lived he clung to it. In that moment it felt not unlike returning to the Burrow last year, like stepping over the threshold and knowing he had come home.

He quickly wiped at his face, grateful that he didn't feel embarrassed or awkward when he pulled away. At first Sirius tried to hold onto him a moment longer, and when he released him he let his hand linger on Harry's shoulder.

'You're not in trouble,' Sirius repeated. 'I'm glad you're here.'

Harry took a deep breath, steadying himself. 'Me too.'

Sirius pulled him back into a hug, rougher and more lighthearted this time. He gave a great sigh before clapping Harry on the back of the shoulder, and then releasing him he nudged him down the hallway towards the basement stairs.

'There's food downstairs. Let's eat first, and then we'll talk.'

A/N Hope it was worth the wait, and that you enjoyed this chapter and where we're going. Thanks for the reviews, really appreciate them :-) One more chapter this weekend and then back to the weekly schedule I think.