Chapter 43: I'm Not in Love With Bella Anymore

Jacob got up, and said, "Alright, is it okay if I use your kitchen? I am going to cook us something. I know you said you are fine, but I don't want to take chances, and you are meeting with Sue tomorrow. I would like you for you to take it easy until Sue says otherwise."

I said, "Okay..that is fine."

Jacob sigh in relief and said, "What would you like to eat? Just tell me what to do, and we can make something."

I nodded, "Okay, uhm. There is chicken marinated in the fridge. Cut some green bell peppers and onions and not-so-thick slices, grill them first before placing the chicken in the pan. Let the chicken charcoal just a bit, but not too dry either. There is some left ver rice, and can you open a can of red beans? Add some oil, and little bit of garlic salt. I trust your palette."

He grinned, "Sure!"

He got to work on our lunch, and I could smell the chicken being grilled. It made my mouth watering, and it made the babies even more fussy, so I got up from the couch to grab three Choco Pies from the cabinets.

Jacob was by the oven, when Jacob turned around to see what I was doing. Jacob tsked, "You could've asked, and I could've gotten for you."

I said waving my hand, "Nah, its fine. You were occupied and the smell of the food got the babies a little more fussy, so I wanted to eat something in the meantime. You want one?"

He nodded very eagerly, with my poor aim, he catches it as I munched on one. He ripped it open and threw the whole Choco Pie in his mouth.

I said teasingly, "You gonna regret that. You want something to drink?"

I laughed when I saw him have a hard time swallowing it, and he gave a huge gulp, but he did it successfully, so he gave me a toothy grin.

He said cockily, "Nope."

I laughed and asked, "How do you like it?"

He said, "Hmm.. it was okay, but I wished I had a drink with it. It was hard to shallow the marshmallow inside of it."

I said, "Yup."

I went back on the table to finish the remaining Choco Pies and drinking water from a water bottle. Finally, Jacob was done. He set the table, served me and himself grilled chicken with rice and beans. I tasted it and I gave a pleased smile, "You did good, Jacob."

His lit up with an awkward laugh, "Yeah?"

I nodded with a smile, and Jacob gave me a appreciate smile for the compliment, so we dig in.

Curiosity got the best of me so while I was eating, I asked, "Jake, so ..what was that about in the phone call with Bella?"

Jacob had his mouth fill of rice and beans, so he took a sip of his drink before saying, "things are different for me."

I said curiously, "How so?"

He said, "I..don't feel anything for Bella anymore. Don't get me wrong, I still care for her as someone that I used to love, but I am not in love with her."

I tilted my head, and asked, "Was it the imprinting or going on the spirit walk that changed?"

He frowned and said, "I think it was both. When I accepted myself as a spirit warrior, I realized I don't really love Bella as strongly as I thought I did. I know it was partially influenced by Meyers, and I had a crush on Bella before I became a shapeshifter. However, since I wasn't accepting my fate as a shapeshifter and I lost sight of who I was when I first phased, I cling onto Bella because me loving her was what reminded the old me before I phased…. My feelings were genuine, but it became an obsession as I kept denying my rightful role as Alpha and as a shapeshifter. I was able to finally accept her refusal and rejection once I accepted myself as a spirit warrior and alpha. So, I was fine until during my very short alpha training in the spirit world, the spirits told me that Leah was my Alpha female due to the large pack of this generation and the incoming transition of the physical world once the supernatural would be exposed. I was shocked and amazed. I really felt I didn't deserve her with how she is and what she went through…, but the spirits had other plans in mind for us, so I wasn't sure what to think of that until I actually locked my eyes on Leah…I felt my whole world shifted. I saw a glimpse of my future with her. I have always seen her and the small admiration that I had of her before I went on the spirit walk came to the forefront of my mind strongly. It's not that the imprinting implanted feelings in me, but it helped me to aware what I already felt of her and.. now when I first locked eyes with her..…I see her potential, her weaknesses but also strengths. From the memories that I got of her while I was gone and how she was slowly changing, it all came together for me. I actually see her for her underneath all the pain and suffering that had been in the forefront of her personality.. I hope that makes sense?"

I said hesitantly, "Ye-yeah. I think so."

He continued, "my feelings for Bella were a closed door, but now that I have imprinted. It is like imprinting made the closed door to a wall. There is no way for me to go back to those feelings. I feel free from Bella once and for all." He croaked at the end.

My heart goes out for Jacob since loving Bella only brought him suffering and torment, but I am glad he is finally free from those feelings.

I was thinking to tell Jacob to let Leah know, but I was remembering of how she responded when she came back from her very quick spirit walk. She did tell Jacob that she felt his genuineness to his feelings toward her, so I don't think it would be necessary to tell him. How he handled himself with the elders and the pack, I am not anxious about the future of the pack. I am confident that he knows what he is doing.

But, what about Sam? How come he still feels something for Leah? It seemed like imprinting or a romantic imprint would cut out all feelings of your past relationships to focus on the imprint. What if Sam in the beginning wasn't meant to be a romantic imprint to Emily, unless long before Sam imprinted Emily, Emily desired Sam while he was with Leah.

I was disturbed by that thought, so I asked but not sure how to word the question, "A-And Sam?"

Jacob sighed, "this is one thing that I found out in the spirit world. Emily..when Sam and Leah were together, she liked the idea of a Sam in her life, but she wasn't interested in Sam at that time, and..because Leah was not meant to be with Sam, the spirits connected Sam to the next potential person who can carry the wolf gene, Emily. With her temperament and her personality, she was perfect for Sam as he was the first shapeshifter for this generation. That is why she was chosen. However, the elders failed to prepare and train their first shapeshifter. When Sam came back from phasing the first time, he was supposed to resolve his feelings with Leah and end things mutually during the few months that he had before he met Emily. Then, with the accident, he only went on the spirit walk to reconcile with his upset wolf spirit, but due to the stress of being alpha and have to train Jared and Paul, his spirit walk was short…Now, hopefully he can spend as much time in his spirit walk to reconcile everything in him."

His voice changed to be a little more threatening hiss, "if he comes back and he still hasn't resolved his feelings for Leah then I will take a chunk out of him."

I nodded. It makes sense because Jacob already gave Sam his chance to reconcile and move on so that Leah can be free, and Sam can move on with his life with Emily. Then, finally the tragedy between three of them can be resolved.

We finished eating, and I made Jacob to let me wipe the counters and rearrange the kitchen as he washed the dishes. I finally sat down in the couch when I heard a knock by the door. I hollered, "Come in" and it was Seth.

Seth came in apprehensively and gave a short nod to Jacob, as Jacob nodded in return as he was wiping the dishes dry. Seth had a backpack on, and he looked a bit tired.

I asked, "Oh, what's wrong?"

He shook his head, "It's nothing. I just came from taking my online classes, and I came over like Jacob asked, so I will be doing my homework as I stick around. Is that okay?"

He looked cautiously both Jacob and me, and I waved my hand, "Don't worry about it, Seth. Focus on your classes. I'll be chilling here. Grab yourself some snacks by the cabinets. I'll be here in the couch."

Seth face was brightened enthusiastically, and he said cheerily, "Thanks Ale! You're the best."

I said, "Sure, sure. I can't really feed you, but you can help yourself."

Seth grabbed some chips and Mexican Coca-Cola at the table as he got himself comfortable, pulled out his laptop and got to work with his headphones on. I pulled out to watch the news, and it was so boring, so I kept on changing it as Jacob was sitting at the other side of the couch resting his head on his arm.

He looked tired, and I wasn't sure why he was still here. He trying to avoid someone or something? I wonder it got to do that aura thing that Old Quil mentioned when he first met me, so is he trying to relax with me around?

Interesting.

Jacob yawned and asked tiredly, "Uh.. I saw something in your past, but I am a bit confused."

I said, "Yeah?"

He said, "Is there some type of alternative universe about us because I saw something called Vampire Sucks?"

Oh no. He saw that? Bro, Noo!. I started laughing loudly out of nowhere.

He flinched in surprise, and said shyly, "What's so funny?"

I said between laughing, "It's..It's a parody movie of your guys' world. Because Meyers named this world the Twilightverse, this movie is a parody of Twilight. There are some parts to it that are so funny, and some parts that are so questionable that it just straight up stupid. Well, depends what kind of humor you have, the movie could be amusing the whole time or just confusing."

He had his arms folded across his chest, and he said, "Huh."

I proceed to tell him some of the scenes of the movie, and he started laughing as well even Seth was laughing quietly to himself. I could tell he was listening what I was telling Jake. There are some parts that Vampire Sucks put a jab to Twilight. For example, how Bella or 'Becca' in the movie, she was literally bleeding liters of blood in her party at the Cullen's house. Honestly, though. In New Moon, how does Bella get a big paper cut that it caused Jasper to lose control? Not only that, but Jasper was also surrounded by teenagers in high school for the most of the day. How he doesn't lose control from that, but with a little piece of paper cut from Bella, he does? In the movie, it looked like a big finger cut definitely not a little fabric cut from opening her birthday present, but really though, who gets a paper cut like that? I know some people have this health condition that once they get a cut, they bleed profusely, so it is an actual thing but I don't think Bella had that. It made no sense to me, and it reminded me to ask the Cullens about that later.

I also told him the scene of him going to Bella's room in the middle of the night after the big fight at his house. I told him that the Vampire Suck's version of Jake has a contract that he needs to take off his shirt every 10 seconds of movie screening time. I told him it was funny because we always see him and the guys from the pack shirtless. Even though we know it is because they are running high temperature and it is easy to just wear bare minimum of clothing when they phase, it was still a lot to always constantly seeing them shirtless. It just doesn't look good lol. I told him it actually made the pack look more of a cult from an outsider's point of view. Jacob took that comment pretty well, and he was thinking very thoughtfully about it. He is going to get the guys to wear more clothes whenever they are going to be seen by regular people to improve the tribe's perspective of the guys which makes sense.

Although there was some rumor that Jacob's movie actor Taylor Lautner was told that he needs to be shirtless majority of the time in New Moon, it felt a bit predator-ish from Meyers or the directors or whoever to tell him to be half naked majority of the time in the movie when I think Taylor Lautner was like 16? When I found out Taylor Lautner's real age and that rumor, I honestly felt bad that my middle school me would be ogling him like that.

We didn't realize we all were laughing so much as we talked more about the movie when I heard someone cleared a throat. I turned and it was Paul. He was leaning against the door with his eyebrow crooked upward and his eyes flashing silver for a moment. Through the bond, I felt a strong feeling of jealousy.

Jealousy?

Author's Note:

Hello! I am back, I hope this chapter was okay. Still a bit hitting a writer's block, but thank you so much for the kind encouragements!

I will be posting another chapter tomorrow. We are finally going to see Ale and Paul's first date. Keke

As always, reviews are very much appreciated.