rating: K
disclaimer: i don't own naruto.
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47. annoying
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"She spent three weeks trying to make that," Sarada says as she wipes at her brow with a towel, leisurely.
Pausing midway in his eating, Sasuke lets his chopsticks hover over his bento box and raises an eyebrow. "Three weeks?" He solemnly gazes at the food Mama prepared for him today.
Chidori training usually leaves her sore and tired, but maybe it's worth it if it means she can tease Papa during lunch breaks. She smiles, innocent. "You should've seen her, Papa! Mama spent her free time day in, day out just to come up with more recipes and practice them!" Mama would totally tell her to stop talking by this point—and luckily, Mama is not here right now.
Sasuke resumes his eating. "Why?"
She debates telling him the real answer, but decides to spare Mama the embarrassment. "She said she really wanted to get better at cooking."
He keeps chewing, in a refined manner. "She's already skilled enough."
The corner of her lips curl upward. "That's what I told her, but she insisted on it."
Papa begins to look contemplative. "I did notice she started making other foods for dinner lately."
Sitting adjacent to him on the ground and taking out her own bento box, Sarada replies, "Different, huh? She wanted more variety."
"What she usually makes is already good." He continues eating.
Casually, she also starts eating. "Maybe you should tell her that yourself, Papa." Since she made those just for you.
Giving her a seemingly-blank glance, Sasuke takes his time sipping his water. "I will later, Peanut."
Bristling at the foul nickname he somehow came up for her a while back, she tries to not shiver in front of him. How in the heavens did he even come up with this name anyway? Not even Mama calls her that! "R-Right…" Sarada tries to smile pleasantly, but feels her eyebrow twitching. "I told you not to call me that, Papa."
Calmly, he seems unfazed and simply enjoys the rest of Mama's lunch. "I am merely doing what most fathers do for their daughters."
Her eyebrow raises. Like giving them atrocious nicknames? "Like calling them after a nut?" she deadpans, then chews some of the rice Mama packed for her.
"Like giving them a nickname that exemplifies affection," he has the gall to correct her, nonchalantly back to eating. "You are my peanut," Papa adds, and Sarada has a hard time trying not to gag on Sakura's lovely-cooked rice.
She wonders how her plans to tease Papa over Mama somehow backfired and resulted in Papa teasing her instead. She didn't even know he was capable of doing that, to be honest. There goes her plans to have some fun after training her butt off for half of her whole day.
Smiling tightly, Sarada plops some tempura into her mouth. "If I'm Peanut, then what is Mama?"
Strangely, his eyes soften. "Sakura."
She blinks. "That's it? Just her name?" Oh, where is the fairness?!
Papa starts smiling, looking amused at her flabbergasted reaction. He doesn't look up from his food, but she can still see that smile from her position. It feels like it's been a while since she's seen him smile like that. Mama must mean so much to him. Lovebirds. "Is it required to call her after food?"
"No," she responds, shaking her head. If it was required, then she'd have to feel sorry for Mama. Looking upward, she contemplates. "But nicknames are supposed to be affectionate, so I guess you can call her anything you want as long as it's meaningful."
"Annoying," he says in response, and it seems sort of random to her.
She quotes bemusedly, "Annoying?"
Papa refuses to elaborate behind it. He smiles, looking like this one word has a special meaning to him and he won't tell her about it. "Nothing," he dismissively replies, eating more rice. "Just something I have attached to my sentimentality." He pauses. "Naruto was always annoying enough to warrant the name anyway."
Oh? She swallows her tempura. "I thought we were talking about a nickname for Mama."
He flawlessly comments without missing a beat, "Which I already provided."
Once more, she raises her eyebrow. "Which is her name."
He nods, which doesn't sate her curiosity. Birth names aren't nicknames, right? Sarada is about to ask him what his thought process is like when he comes up with nicknames—
"I'm going to check in with Naruto real quick," he tells her, neatly placing his chopsticks back into the empty box and rewrapping it again with the cloth Mama provided. Sasuke stands up, holding the bento box with his only arm. "I'll be back soon."
The moment he vanishes in a puff of smoke, she stares at the spot he was standing at and sighs in distress, "But I'm still wondering why I'm Peanut…"
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Walking out of the bathroom and feeling refreshed from her bath, she's about to walk to the kitchen for a cup of Mama's tea until she hears: "You know, I'm getting tired of hearing the trainee nurses talk about how you and Naruto fight like cats and dogs."
"I do no such thing," Papa says afterward, sounding like his voice is coming from the kitchen with Mama's voice.
Mama makes a lighthearted scoff. "Yeah, right. Then what were all of those years of fighting I witnessed between you two?"
"Competition," he replies. Leaning against the walls in the shadows, Sarada hears a small clink of a cup. He's probably drinking something.
"Competition," Mama jokingly quotes, attempting some deep imitation of Papa's voice, which failed miserably. "What did you two 'compete' over today, pray tell?"
Papa sighs. "He wanted me to convince Shikamaru to let him go stuff his mouth with a new flavor of ramen that was recently released." Mama snickers. "When that didn't work, the idiot wanted me to bring some back for him instead."
Hearing this, Sarada widens her eyes and would've fallen backwards had she not already been leaning against the wall. Nanadaime is her idol, but she seldom sees his notorious ramen-eating habits before, and it sounds a little surreal to hear this from Papa.
Sounding fond, Sakura comments, "Same old Naruto. That big dolt."
"Dunderhead," Papa remarks.
Mama laughs, amused. "Are you ever going to call him anything nice for once?"
A pause, then: "Usuratonkachi." (Sarada is starting to feel sorry for Nanadaime.)
"I said nice."
"Naruto."
Sarada stifles a snort to prevent blowing her cover as Sakura sounds exasperated, "That's his name."
"I was told nicknames are supposed to be meaningful," Papa replies casually.
Sarada can't see her face, but Mama is probably rolling her eyes. "Alright, then what about me? Surely, I have better standing than Naruto for this."
"Annoying," he softly answers, sounding like he's sipping something again.
Piqued, Sarada listens closely because all Mama does in response is laugh, also sounding soft. "Right! That's me."
"Always have been," he murmurs.
Mama sounds happy: "Stuck with me for life!"
"Hm," Papa hums, sounding light.
Smiling, Sarada can't resist shaking her head because they still act like newlyweds. Honestly, Papa should've just told her that Annoying is Mama's real nickname rather than playing mind games with her. Mama herself seems pretty fond of it, so it's not like Sarada is going to tease him over it—
"Speaking of nicknames," Sakura suddenly says, strangely loud. "I'm going to call someone Insomniac if she doesn't go to bed soon."
Sometimes, Mama's acute senses scare her.
Sarada quietly gulps to herself and smiles palely before walking away to her room obediently, deciding that she can have tea tomorrow instead. Closing her door, she thinks that Mama's nicknames are as bad as Papa's.
Newlyweds, she snorts.