"Wash the glasses and scrub the plates; that's what stains and grime all hate! With our sponge and soap, we'll clean all of these dirty plates!" Nifty sang with a smile and cheerful attitude as she and the Slayer cleaned up his breakfast.
Nifty was a weird girl, and that's being polite about it. There was a side of her that was no different from any other romance-obsessed person, whether male or female. But then you had this side, the joy of cleanliness, to her and literally no one else in creation this counted as a date between her and the Slayer. And to make sure it was an actual date before they came in with his plates, glasses, and silverware, she rushed into the kitchen and kindly told all of the chefs to GTFO.
"You have a song for washing dishes?..." The Slayer asked, his helmet hiding the small smile he had from how amused he was by that, but not in an insulting way.
"I have a song for everything!" She answered while turning to look at him, "And I mean EVERYTHING. Dusting, mopping, laundry, bathrooms, bedrooms, the list is as long as my chores." She explained.
"Surprised you have the time not only to write so many but to memorize them too..." He complimented, impressed by that.
"Yeah, well...I've had more free time thanks to all of the staff we got when the hotel was rebuilt. Not so much that I'm not busy or cleaning up after them because they DO make all kinds of mistakes which I have to fix, so people don't think we're slobs. But other than that, I have plenty of time to come up with these songs and learn them note for note!" She exclaimed proudly.
"Maybe you could join my band then..." He suggested, which made her gasp.
"So you ARE going to be performing more then?! That wasn't just a one-time thing?!" She questioned.
"It could be...depends on how Loona and Octavia feel..." He replied.
"Well, we're just going to have to make sure they reach the right decision!" She decided, which made him chuckle.
"I don't think you can make those two do anything they don't want to...not like I would want that anyway..." He said.
"But Will! This is your chance to be a big-time celebrity!" She argued.
"Aren't I already one?..." He asked.
"For murder, sure, but do you REALLY want to have the same kind of fame as most of the people down here? The serial killers, I mean." She responded.
"I'm not the same as a serial killer. I'd never hurt someone who didn't deserve it." He said in a stern tone, but only to make sure that was clear and not because she made him angry, "But I do understand your point... it could be nice to be known for something other than putting holes the size of bowling balls into monsters..." He agreed.
"Right? So, here's what I'm thinking." She began as they both finished washing the dishes, "I. Your wonderful friend Nifty could become...wait for it...YOUR MANAGER!" She shouted zestfully.
"I don't know...I'm pretty sure that's what Katie's job is...or if it isn't, she might try to bite my head off if I gave it to anyone else..." He told her.
"Katie has her job at Slayer studios. She's busy managing a multimedia startup that will explode more than it already has, thanks to your return and the concert you put on last night." She argued, making her case, "Plus, and I say this with nothing but love, the only person who beats her out for anti-social champion is Husk. Basically, she's not a people person." She said to him in a whisper, "But for me? I'm ALL about people! I'm friendly, I'm cute, and I'm persistent! With me as your manager, there's nothing I couldn't do for you!" She exclaimed.
Taking a second to consider her proposal, he swiftly managed to decide because he took her seriously as a good friend would.
"Well...you're right that Katie's ability to interact with others who aren't close to her is arguably her weakest..." He started as he folded his arms, "And the only other person who matches the qualities you have is Charlie, who is busy running the hotel..." He continued, "But still, to my knowledge, you don't have any experience with something like this...if you can convince Husk and Alastor, who know you better than anyone, that you'd not only be capable but would excel, then you're hired..." He concluded.
Letting out a squeal so high-pitched and full of energy it broke some of the glasses nearby, Nifty lept at him and wrapped her arms tightly around his neck.
"OH, WILL THANK YOU! THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!" She shouted rapidly while hugging him, "I PROMISE! YOU'RE NOT GOING TO REGRET THIS AT ALL!" She promised.
"Glad to hear it..." He replied while gently patting her on the back, "Now then, why don't you go get started on trying to get their endorsement while I stay here and clean up the glasses you shattered?..." He suggested.
"Sounds good to me!" She agreed with another smile before letting go and hurrying out of the room.
Still amused by how excited and expressive she was, the Slayer moved his attention away from her to the broken pieces of glass on the floor. However, unknown to him, Nifty didn't go very far. She was standing right outside the kitchen door, but she wouldn't be there for very long. She merely stood where she was to think to herself, all the while the most sinister grin anyone could've seen was spread across her face.
"Hehehe, once I'm his manager, I'll get to be around him twenty-four seven. I'll get closer to him than Angel Dust or Katie or anyone else can. Then we'll start going on dates, fall in love, and I'LL be the one who can proudly call herself MISSES SLAYER!... Misses Blazcowicz?... Eh, it'll sort itself out when we're married." She thought, ending it with a shrug, before getting on her way to earn Husk and Alastor's approval.
Elsewhere...
Beautiful was the word Octavia thought of when she first laid her eyes on where Gabriel took them. She expected to go somewhere in the circle, or perhaps Urdak since they'd been there before, if only once. But where they went was indescribable, bright green grass as far as the eye could see covering rolling hills, flowers, and other such flora adding a rainbow of color to the scenery, and the sky above was bright blue with only a few white clouds.
"I must confess. I was the one who suggested this be the place for you and your mother's conversation." Gabriel spoke, explaining so she wouldn't need to ask, "A sibling of mine named Abaddon has recently...refurbished their circle. At least that's the best way to describe the transformation. And beyond the breathtaking environment, it is entirely isolated. This way, you and your mother will have no intrusion on your conversation, other than mine, of course." He told her.
"It's not an intrusion if I invited you." She said with a smile as she looked at him.
"I suppose that is correct. And may I say again how flattered and honored I am your trust in me is enough to be here for such a personal event." He replied.
"Who better to trust than an archangel?" She asked before looking around, "So, where is my mom?" She inquired.
"Over there." He answered, directing her vision with the point of his finger to a tree not far from their position, "She's sitting on the other side out of view. I had us arrive here in case you needed a moment to prepare yourself or in case you had second thoughts." He explained.
"I appreciate that. But no matter how much time I have, I won't be prepared for what's going to happen or what's going to be said." She said with a sigh, "So...it's better to get it started without thinking so I don't hesitate." She decided.
Forcing her body to walk forward as it wouldn't move otherwise, with Gabriel at her side Octavia approached the tree. Like everything else, the tree itself was beautiful, healthy brown color to its bark, and the leaves were full of life. Sadly she couldn't enjoy its majesty nor that of her surroundings, for once she and Gabriel got closer and started to walk around it, her eyes locked with those of the person she needed to speak with.
"Octavia, you came." Stella greeted with widened eyes, as a part of her was expecting this would end differently.
"Yeah...I did." Octavia responded, not offended by her mother's surprise because it made perfect sense, "I hope you don't mind, but I asked Gabriel if he could stay with me as we talk...I couldn't do this alone, and dad certainly wasn't an option." She explained while pointing to the archangel with her thumb.
"Not at all. If anything, I was going to make the same request once he brought you here if you decided to come at all, of course." Stella replied, being just as if not more nervous than her child.
"Forgive me for putting myself in the conversation." Gabriel spoke to get their attention, "But should I sit next to one of you? Standoff to the side? I don't know where I'm meant to be during...this." He explained.
"You can stand a little ways from us. I think that would be best," Stella suggested.
"Yeah, just be ready in case either of us starts crying or screaming, and we need someone to get in the middle," Octavia added.
"Thank you for the clarification." He replied before walking to a distance that gave them some privacy but also so he could be there in an instant.
With the archangel no longer nearby, the mother and daughter duo were alone, yet neither was ready or sure how to start this long-overdue conversation.
"...You...could sit next to me." Stella offered while patting the ground with her hand to get things going.
"Maybe...depends on how this goes..." Octavia replied.
"Right, of course." She said, moving her hand back to her lap, "...Octavia, I...don't know where to begin..." She admitted with a sigh, "Do I apologize for the past? What led up to me and your father's divorce? How was I never really there for you or acted as a mother in any way? There are too many options...but that only shows how horrible I was as a parent and person..." She told her.
"Is this real?" Octavia questioned while crossing her arms, "I already asked Gabriel if this was all an act before, and I believed him. But I know you, mom. I know the kind of person you've always been and the things you've done for the sake of keeping up appearances and maintaining what is expected of the noble class. So I'm sorry if even after everything that is happening right now, I still can't believe it's real, but I need to hear and see you say that is." She demanded.
Responding to that by immediately standing up from her place on the ground, Stella took a few steps closer and placed her hands on her daughter's shoulders.
"It's real." She told her seriously, looking her straight in the eyes as she did, "I'm not trying to act like a new person because I'm not. Nor am I trying to pretend that everything will be okay with one conversation, and we'll suddenly be best friends or like sisters. The only reason I want to talk to you is to see if someday that can be possible if we can be anything at all to each other, even if it is only acquaintances. The time I have spent in Gabriel's company and Helsa's, as hard as the latter may be to believe, has made me realize that I am not perfect. I like anyone else, can make mistakes, am capable of being flawed, and have been for most of my life. Again I cannot stress enough to you I'm not expecting this to end a certain way; simply talking to you is what I wanted, and you've given me that. If you decide you've heard enough, then tell Gabriel to take you home." She said.
Like before in Hell, everything stopped for Octavia; the only thing still moving was the wind that blew gently against her body and feathers. But this wind was different than the last; it wasn't cold to the point it made her pull the cloak Gabriel gave her shut, which she was still wearing. Instead, it was warm; it didn't carry an omen foreboding tragedy; this wind offered the possibility that something good was waiting.
"You're...serious...you're actually serious..." Octavia muttered in disbelief as she looked at her mother's face, "I...where the hell has this been?!" She questioned; in an instant, she was furious, even going so far as to step away from Stella, "All of my FUCKING life I have waited for this, for you to finally act like my fucking mom! Yet only now when you're losing everything, forced to go into rehab or face damnation, AND when a FUCKING ARCHANGEL FROM FUCKING HEAVEN IS INVOLVED DO YOU CHANGE?! HOW IS THAT FUCKING FAIR TO ME?!" She screamed.
"It isn't," Steall replied while closing her eyes and moving her hands in front of her, not daring to say more as she knew she deserved everything her daughter had to say.
"Do you know how many times I wanted you? How many times I NEEDED you?! And while dad is just as guilty as you are for all of the insane terrible fucking things I've seen, things a child should NEVER see regarding their parents! At least whenever I needed him, he was there for me. Sure sometimes he's too much of a dork for his good, definitely lets his sex drive interfere with his life too much, but I was ALWAYS his top priority! HE FUCKING LOVED ME!" Octavia shouted as she balled her hands into fists, tears falling from her eyes because she couldn't hold them back anymore, "But you...you went out of your way to have as little to do with me as possible...only ever caring about me or my life if it benefited you somehow or if you had nothing else to do...I mean, for fuck's sake, mom...why did you even have me at all?..." She asked.
Now, it was Stella's world that stopped. That question made her feel many things, none of which were the slightest bit good. But combined, they formed one word in her mind, and this single word summed up what she'd been up until now, she was a monster.
"...Because...the noble class must ensure their family's future...that...is why I had you..." Stella answered with a sorrowful expression, "I did love your father...thought he was charming...I had plenty of suitors, so it had to be real with him...otherwise, why even choose yourself when you could wait for the best offer?..." She asked, "But you're asking me why I had you...and I can't tell you without lying that it was only to have a family and raise a child...as your father is a prince so too are you a princess...and for me as to how I was raised...it was the responsibility of any nobleman or woman to keep our class pure...at least...that's how my parents described it..." She explained.
"So it's your parents' fault then? You're free of all blame for being a shitty mom?" Octavia questioned.
"No. My choices are mine and mine alone. My parents and upbringing influenced my behavior and actions, but they were still mine to make. I could've been different, but I feared how that would reflect on our status in society, which I now realize is quite possibly the most worthless thing to care about, but that's not important right now." She said as she reopened her eyes, showing she was crying as well, "I'm sorry, Octavia. I was never your mother beyond the fact that I gave birth to you. I'm so sorry." She apologized.
At that point, both women were on the verge of sobbing. And yet they continued to fight against it, though, it wasn't to maintain an appearance or keep from showing any weakness. It was because there was only one thing left that needed to be said between them, one final statement that'd end this conversation and decide the future, and that statement fell on the shoulders of Octavia.
"Why couldn't you just be a bitch?..." She asked as she looked at the ground, "If you said anything...even one single off-handed remark about anything...I could still hate you and tell you to stay out of my life forever...but I can't now..." She said while shutting her eyes tightly, "I want a mom...I've wanted one my entire life...and even though a part of me wants to slap you or curse you for having this change of heart...the other part wants me to run into your arms and start crying...but I can't do either...because one conversation isn't enough to fix everything...but...it's a start..." She told her.
"Does...does that mean?..." Stella questioned with widened eyes, trying her best not to be hopeful, but she couldn't keep it from happening.
She could only respond with a nod as her emotions choked her, causing Stella, unable to contain herself anymore, to rush towards her daughter and hug her. When this happened, Octavia lost all control and held her mother as tightly as she was before both broke down sobbing. They weren't friends now, weren't sisters either, but this embrace marked the start of their efforts to become a parent and her child. Unfortunately, this touching moment would be interrupted, but not because of something terrible.
"Pardon me." Gabriel spoke up, having walked over about thirty seconds after the crying started, "I'm so sorry to disturb you, but is this crying good or bad? I assumed good because you're hugging, but I'm not sure how demons express affection." He confessed.
"Yeah, it's good." Octavia managed to get out alongside a chuckle, though she was still crying profusely, as was her mother.
"Oh, good. I'm glad to hear you two have at least come to something agreeable. I'll be honest; I wasn't comfortable with the idea of getting between the two of you if you decided to get physical." He confessed before turning around, "I'll let you two cry some more. Come get me when you're ready to go back." He instructed.
However, before he could take one step from them, Stella let go of her daughter, rushed over, spun him around, and hugged him.
"Thank you, Gabriel." She told him while tightening her embrace, "You helped give me this second chance with my daughter. I will never forget, EVER." She said.
"Uh...you're welcome, Stella...glad I could be of assistance..." He replied awkwardly, not knowing how to respond or handle this situation.
Sadly it'd get worse for the socially awkward archangel, as Octavia came over and hugged him as well.
"Yeah, thanks, Gabriel." She said with a smile.
"...Oh father...please help me...I don't know what to do..." He begged in his mind, never having been faced with anything like this before.
Meanwhile, In A Secluded Area Of Lucifer's Circle...
"Ah, father, there you are." Samur greeted as Vega appeared before him via a portal.
It'd been an hour almost since Vega had his conversation with Lucifer. But instead of going directly to the location where the new facilities were being constructed, he made a quick stop in Urdak to make sure things were settled there.
"Sorry I'm late, just wanted to see if the Dark One's power had done anything nefarious with all of us being absent." He replied as the portal closed.
"Do you not trust the containment measures me and the Wretch have taken?" Samur asked.
"Of course I do. But it helps to be a bit paranoid when it comes to things like this. I learned that from Will." He answered before seeming to lock up physically.
"Father? Are you alright?" Samur questioned.
"Yes, again, my apologies, I just received word from Gabriel. It's so rarely my children ask for me I wasn't expecting it." He said.
"Is something wrong? Does he need our assistance?" Samur inquired.
"No. If anything from what I can quickly discern of his situation, this is good for him." He decided, "Now then, shall we focus on the task in front of us?" He suggested.
"As you wish," Samur replied before they started moving, "The buildings are coming along quite well thanks to the Sentinels lending us their labor. I estimate that they'll be up and operational before the day is through. As for the additional units we want to add to the Authorities ranks and Pentagram City as a whole, we've yet to deploy them as we think it'd be best if that happens after your son's press conference." He informed.
"Agreed. Although, I am starting to think we should delegate these responsibilities to someone else." Vega shared.
"Lucifer's crumbling beneath the weight of it all finally?" He asked.
"The crumbling started long before now. At this point, he's crushed, and his bones are being ground to powder," Vega answered.
"Ah, it has gotten worse then." He replied, "If it would help, I'd be more than happy to handle this. Give your son the time off he desperately needs." He suggested.
"Oh Samur, that'd be perfect, thank you," Vega responded, "But won't the Wretch need your assistance here?" He asked.
"Not at all. With all seven Khans helping him, my presence isn't necessary." Samur answered.
"Ah, that's true. Speaking of how did the matter of him giving them names resolve?" He inquired.
"Surprisingly well. He maintained his composure, informed them of the exchange you two had, explained that he was still mulling over it, and requested they drop it for now." Samur explained.
"And did they?" He asked.
"On the condition, he, at the very least, share what he's come up with so far by next week," Samur answered.
"Hahaha, I think the Wretch was right. Our exposure to those of Hell has affected us in some ways." He suggested.
"Should we be concerned?" Samur asked, though in a less than serious way, for he knew the answer.
"I don't see a reason to be. If anything, this helps us be closer to those who aren't of our origin. Become more normal in a sense." He answered.
"A greater quantity of normality maybe what we all need truthfully," Samur suggested.
"I couldn't agree more." He responded.
Hours Later, At The Happy Hotel...
You know, to everyone's surprise, things weren't all too insane at the moment. Maybe it was due to the residents all being tired from their programs, possibly caused by the celebration the night before, whatever the reason the Happy Hotel wasn't swarmed with demons and Imps wanting to see the Slayer. Not to imply he wasn't surrounded, because of course, he was, but the group that currently swarmed him had every right to. The Imps he rescued a few weeks ago were the ones presently stuck to him like glue, all expressing their gratitude in some way or another.
So for his friends hanging out in the lobby close by, who also stuck around all day even after they woke up, they didn't feel jealous or upset. After all, now that he was back, they'd get him all to themselves most of the time.
"You know, for someone so good at killing the shit out of things, Will's good with kids." Angel Dust commented as he and the others hung around the front desk since Husk had to be there anyway.
"Eh, doesn't surprise me at all." The feathered feline said with a shrug, "Think about it. The man is only brutal when brutality is needed. But how often does one find themselves in a situation where they need to strike a kid they explode?" He asked before immediately raising a hand, "Forget I asked." He added, mostly directing that towards the IMP group as each member was about to say something.
"On the subject of children, Loona, are you sure you haven't heard from Octavia?" Stolas asked for what was the hundredth time by now.
"Stolas. I like you. This is why if you don't stop asking me that FUCKING question, I am going to regret it when I rip out your vocal cords." She told him.
"I'm sorry. But it isn't like Via to take off without telling me where she's going; even when she's in the, I hate you dad kind of mood." He said before looking to Azrael, "Any word from your brother?" He inquired.
"No...which is admittedly quite strange..." She responded, "Though, in his defense, I and my kin haven't used this particular method of communication since the split happened. I very well could be out of practice, or he might not be receiving it." She explained.
"It's still fucking weird how he came looking for her, or am I the only one thinking that?" Blitzo asked.
"You. It's ONLY ever you." Moxxie answered.
"I can second that." Vox chimed in.
"Oh, shut the fuck up, both of you," Blitzo replied scornfully as he crossed his arms, "And what the fuck are you even still doing here, Vox? Shouldn't you be back at the studio working on your game or something?" He questioned.
"First of all, fuck you. Second of all, we have no work to do until we start receiving feedback on the demo. But even after a full day of it being out there, there's been no mention of it anywhere on the internet." Vox explained.
"Huh, must really suck ass then." He told him.
Expecting Vox to do something violent in response, everyone was surprised when Sir Pentious stepped in by wrapping his tail around the Imp and tossing him across the room.
"I got your back." He said to the Overlord, which made him smile.
"Well, well, aren't you two gay as shit? How adorable." Cherri teased with a grin.
"In all seriousness, it is good to see you're getting along so well," Katie admitted.
"Of course we are!" Velvet exclaimed, answering for all three of them, "With Pentious around, Vox doesn't get the headaches that want to make him kill our entire staff! And I didn't think that was possible!" She shared.
"That is good. We can't afford any bad press now that Will's back," Katie said.
"Already thinking business, huh?" Angel Dust inquired.
"Obviously, after that show last night, he's become even more famous than he already was, which in itself is incredible." She explained.
"Tell me about it. You can't go on social media without seeing his, mine, and Octavia's faces plastered everywhere." Loona informed as she held up her phone to show everyone.
"You know Katie; you could be their manager. Can't think of anyone better for the job." Vagatha suggested.
"OH! That's a great idea! And I could be their costume designer!" Charlie suggested.
"You put me in a costume, and I'll kill you," Loona warned.
"I don't know; Katie's got SO much on her plate as it is! Do we REALLY want to pile more on top of what she has to deal with every single day?" Alastor questioned.
"...The fuck did that come from?" Angel Dust asked; he and everyone else caught off guard by that.
"Yeah, what do you think I'm not capable of managing their group?" Katie asked.
"Not at all. But you're so busy dealing with everything at Slayer Studios. Perhaps it would be better if someone else took the job?" He suggested.
"That's...unnaturally considerate of you, Al. The fuck are you trying to do?" Cherri interrogated.
"What? Is it SO out of character for me to care about any of you?" He asked.
"Yes." Everyone said in unison, Azrael being the sole exception.
"...Huh...so this is what a blow to one's pride feels like..." He replied, genuinely feel a tinge of pain in his chest.
But before they could continue to investigate the radio demon's strange sudden concern for Katie's workload, they all heard the front doors open, which earned their attention.
"Via?" Stolas said as he turned to look but was quickly filled with disappointment since it wasn't his daughter.
"No. I'm sorry." Lilith apologized with an awkward smile before walking over.
"Mom? What're you doing here?" Charlie asked.
"I came to see if any of you would be watching your father's press conference, and if you were, I thought we could watch it together." She answered.
"As someone who was hit in the face with the fucking thing the conference is about, which forced me to spend an entire month in a hospital in Heaven, I can safely say I've had my fill." Husk told her.
"And as someone who was partly responsible for it, albeit it was during a period where I was in a meat puppet suit, I'd rather put the whole experience behind me." Sir Pentious said.
"I don't know, guys. We may want to watch it." Vagatha spoke up before she looked over at the Slayer, who currently had an Imp child, the very same he met on the street that day, sitting on his shoulders, "We might get to learn more about what's going on. Since Will hasn't said much about it." She suggested.
"Yes, and for MANY damn good reasons." Sir Pentious argued.
"You don't have to watch it, snake boy." Angel Dust replied while crossing his arms, "I, for one, however, want to, I don't feel like ruining Will's good mood, so if Lucifer's gonna explain shit, I'm fine with that." He said.
"Likewise, having some context for Will's nightmares would be nice." Cherri agreed.
"Fine, geez." Husk said with a sigh and an eye roll, "But if we don't want to bother him, we're going to have e to watch it on my TV." He told them.
"Oh no, the moderately sized flatscreen you have on your desk. What a major inconvenience." Blitzo replied sarcastically while waving his hands.
"...When the hell did you get back here?" Vox questioned as no one noticed the Imp return.
"You were all too busy focusing on deer boy and his fixation on Katie. I snuck back into the group. Also, fuck you." He explained.
He shouldn't have said that again because it earned him another throw across the lobby courtesy of Sir Pentious.
"As I said, I've got you." He repeated to the Overlord, which made the other smile.
Elsewhere...
"Are...you okay...sir?..." An Authority asked as they and their partner looked at lord Lucifer.
The devil was, in fact, not okay. When he told his father he would crawl under his desk and sob uncontrollably until the press conference, it was an exaggerated statement made out of distress. But only with the desk part, what he ended up doing was flopping face down on one of his couches, THEN he sobbed for several hours. However, now was not the time to think of his rapidly deteriorating sanity and emotional health; his people have been demanding answers for over a month now, and damn it, they were going to get them!
Sadly, this enthusiasm only exists within this text. In reality, Lucifer looked one good strong gust of wind away from falling apart. His hair was slightly messy, his clothes were wrinkled, and although he tried hiding it with some makeup that matched his skin, you could see some dark purple beneath his eyes from the stress and lack of sleep. Indeed, at this point, the devil was being held together by nothing more than chewing gum and shoelaces.
"Yes...no...maybe...I'm ALIVE." He answered while lightly slapping his face, "I am ALIVE, right? Or at least awake? Is this Hell still? And if it is, are we in my circle or one of my siblings'? Or a devil who isn't family?" He asked.
"I don't think he's okay..." The Authority whispered to their partner, receiving a nod in response, "Yes, sir. We are in your circle, this is Hell, you're alive and wake, and you are about to go speak at a press conference." They answered.
"RIGHT! THE PRESS CONFERENCE!" He shouted, causing both Authorities to jump backward, "I...have something I think...a press...no...a...SPEECH! A SPEECH! THAT'S THE THING OR THE NAME OF THING!" He remembered.
"Uh...yes, sir, you do...you actually gave it to me for safekeeping earlier..." The second Authority told him as they took a folded piece of paper out of their pocket and presented it to him, which in turn made him gasp.
"YOU ARE AN ANGEL!" He exclaimed as he took it, hugging them when he did.
Though they were caught off guard by the sudden embrace from their boss, now that Lucifer was so close, both Authorities, yes both, could smell a specific odor coming from him.
"Wait...are you drunk?!" They both asked.
"SHH! Don't tell anyone...ESPECIALLY my wife!" He answered, pretty much confirming it right then and there.
"Sir! We saw you a mere two hours ago! How are you so...lubricated?" The first one asked, trying to put it politely.
"LISTEN HERE YA LITTLE SHIT!" He shouted while pushing a finger into their helmet-covered face, "I. HAVE HAD. SO MUCH FUCKING SHIT ON MY GODDAMN PLATE! SO MUCH! IF...IF I DIDN'T DRINK...THEN THE ONLY BAD TASTING LIQUID I'D HAVE TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER WOULD BE MY FUCKING TEARS!" He told them before taking a step back, "IS IT SO MUCH TO FUCKING ASK THAT THE DEVIL BE GIVEN A BREAK?! IS IT GOD?! I MEAN DAD?! I MEAN VEGA?! WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU'RE GOING BY NOW?!" He questioned.
Before the devil could rant anymore, the sound of approaching footsteps was heard, followed by the appearance of a third Authority.
"Sir, the reporters and everyone else are ready for you." They informed.
"Oh, okay, thank you." He replied, suddenly having his composure, "Best not to keep them waiting, been doing that long enough." He added before walking past the third Authority.
"Should...we stop him?..." The second one asked, looking to their partner.
"Nah, I'm pretty sure he'll keep his cool when he's in front of everyone. He's a politician, after all." They answered as they crossed their arms, "I mean, it's not like some massive unexpected tragedy that'll shake the very foundation of our society is going to happen at the same time as the conference, because REALLY what are the chances of that happening?" He said.
(A/N: Mad respect to anyone who can guess where the cadence from Nifty's song is from.)