Siranon did a double take. About to leave for his day of duty, he stepped into their shared cleansing space to bid Shanna goodbye. He stuck his head into the shower area and had the dawning recognition that once again, his wife's physical form had begun to change. The last time it had happened this way- arms percitibly hardening, abs separating into muscular sections of four, thighs hardening- she had undertaken a program to get herself acclimated to his home environment of Vulcan. But they were on the very hospitable Mashtiq world and there was no reason she needed to adjust here. What was happening now?

Shanna turned and startled. "Oh!" she jumped at the sight of him. "You're so quiet!" she laughed. That spontaneous laughter... She had become a little more joyful, of late.

He chided himself. Once again, he had lost track of whatever it was his wife was doing to the exclusion of his embassy duties. "My wife-" and then he wondered, what would he ask? 'Why have you suddenly begun to ch-' 'My wife, your physique has markedly impr-' 'Shanna, I cannot help but notice, your abdominal region is no longer dist-' He saw the problem of his potential wording from a distance and was grateful he had not ventured to begin any of the unwise sentences that began themselves in his head. Any way he worded it would acknowledge how she had previously fallen into- disrepair? No! That was not the wording he wished to use, either! No, it was better to say nothing.

"Are you about to leave for the day?" she asked, trying to break him out of just standing there, staring, obviously mulling over something. He's more than simply 'not stupid'. He knows what he's looking at, but why isn't he saying anything to me about it? I mean, does he at least like what he sees? Annoyance reared its head, yet again, at their obvious communication issues. She knew she could just speak up and call him out on it. Say something, say something, SAY SOMETHING! She didn't. Shanna instead just stuck her fingers out of the shower to make contact with his in an effort to hasten his departure.

He put his fingers to hers. And the simmering hum of frustration could be felt from and by both parties.

Still, neither party decided, for that moment, to say anything about anything at all.

Siranon went on with his day. But the thoughts continued to plague his mind, what was his wife doing? And why? Some part of him knew it was terribly illogical, but he was also wondering 'and with whom?' Disappointment in himself for that last thought flooded his system.

Years ago, when she had informed him of the intense physical conditioning she had undertaken to acclimate herself to his planet, he had not at all been encouraging. He had been sincerely worried that his wife was taking on too much and would harm herself. But in the end, it had turned into the right thing to do and it had served their interests after all with her having markedly improved health, and not just on his planet of birth. But she had not kept it a secret from him. Why was this time around a secret? He also wondered: was there a secret? Or was it simply an omission? He knew it could not be an intentional coverup, the changes were too obvious. His mind looked at it from a different point of view. Perhaps whatever she was doing, she did not see it as that big a deal and that is why she had said nothing.

He reminded himself, his wife was her own person. And yet, he could not help but wonder, what was it that had made her into a more mellow being, of late? And who was she spending all of this time with as she built up her physical form?

But the question that bothered him most… how had he become so detached from their union that he had not noticed what was happening (whatever it was that was happening!) until now? And why did he not ask?

##

Shanna didn't understand why she saw the need to hide her activities. Did she think Siranon would not approve? (Maybe?) Did she think he would stand in the way of what she was doing? (No! Well- may… ...be?) So what was the real problem?

She waited until she knew he was definitely away for his duties for that day. She picked up her communication device. "Lady, I am ready to go!"

"I am on my way there now," Ta'ole answered. "I was able to secure transportation form Telqal."

"Excellent!" she whispered in return. They had been picked up by others before, but Telqal was the one that seemed most in tune with them.

There was a pause on the other end. "You have the sound of one who is hiding their activities. What is with these hushed tones? Have you not yet informed your hus-"

"I know, I know," groaned Shanna.

"Hmmpf," she huffed out. "The foolishness of this! We will discuss it later. I am nearly there."

Shanna made certain Henry and Ananda were well invested with their tutors for the next four hours. That's usually about how long it took to get to wherever they needed to be, get their training in, and then return.

##

She and Ta'ole met up at the joint meeting place they usually did, halfway between the Vulcan and Klingon section. "What took you so long?" Ta'ole chided her. "If we run now, we may just make it to the craft in time."

The two jogged the almost five minutes to where Telqal was waiting for them. And they could see her from afar, her long curly ponytail waving in the wind. She was beckoning for them to come quickly. Jogging on sand was difficult enough, but they had both been about this for months and it had become a little less arduous for them.

Ta'ole had undertaken to turn Shanna into a warrior, but quickly realized that she had allowed herself to fall into substandard readiness for any form of battlefield. The training had benefited her, as well.

"Come!" Telqal said as the two reached what could only be described as a raft. "The Sisterhood of Swords awaits our presence!"

##

The first time they had undertaken this journey, Shanna found herself a nervous wreck unsure if any of this was a good idea. Once they'd made it to their destination, she was very certain she would not do this again. By week three, she realized she was adjusting to the strange passageway to the training grounds.

Now, nearly six months in, she felt the same thing every time they climbed aboard one of these tiny rafts. Anticipation.

The three women would get on board and steer out. After anchoring the raft just at the point next to open sea, they would all disrobe, jump into the ocean, and swim down to a location not too far under the waves. And there would be one of those underwater meeting places with the transparent dome awaiting their presence.

The first time, she had nearly drowned. But now, after learning to adjust, Shanna was able to hold her breath just long enough to make it to the air-filled location.

The three of them pushed through the squish of the permeable membrane and entered the dry large meeting space. Already, most of the women of this particular chapter had begun to train.

Shanna, back then, did not understand that by beginning to train in this way with a division of the Mashtiq, she would start to gain somewhat of an insider's perspective on certain aspects of the culture. She also didn't realize that she would begin to be accorded a certain amount of respect for doing so. Both her and Ta'ole were gaining their husbands a more secure footing in the Mastiq's estimation. Unlike Siranon, Chol'chyr was aware of his wife's activities.

"You must work with the archer, first," Telqal informed them both that day as soon as they entered the membrane. Neither of them were fans of the ranged weapon.

"Oh damn," Shanna muttered under her breath as they all donned the light defense clothing for combat training.

Working first with archery, they both received the good news that despite their lack of confidence with the weapon, they were both incrementally improving.

And then onto melee weapons combat.

Watching Ta'ole wield her weapon of choice, the bat'leth, was always an amazing sight to behold. Bat'leths had been one of the gifts sent from the Klingon delegation to the Mashtiq. The warrior race had very much appreciated the gesture. So when Ta'ole was able to demonstrate its proper use, she was quickly pulled in by the warriors and used it on a regular basis to show it's practical strengths.

Shanna, however, had had no previous weapons experience of any kind. Ta'ole had undertaken to show her the usage of the bat'leth in private a few days a week, but when she entered training with the Mashtiq, she was first given a staff and began learning it's usage. Within months, she was then handed a polearm with a blunted blade.

Today, things were about to change.

Weaponmaster Shiltaf issued her a curved shortsword with an blunting energy barrier surrounding the blade. This was made specifically for those still in training. "Learn this first, and then you will learn the shortsword…"

Shanna found herself honored at being presented with a new weapon. She did not know how well she was doing since the Mashtiq were not big on encouragement or words of positivity. She only knew she did well when Shiltaf's face would break into the grimmest of smiles at some maneuver Shanna would happen to pull out in sheer desperation of not wishing to be struck. The veteran fighter was short and sturdy, legs and arms full of power. She did not hold back on Shanna, even at the beginning. This woman knew that Shanna possessed something within that was capable of much. Both she and Ta'ole had discussed at length Shanna's struggles and fight against the darkness within herself. Shanna did not know this, she only knew that Shiltaf was a hard taskmaster who was determined to, in Shiltaf's words, 'make her into a real woman'.

At the beginning of her training, Shanna could not deny hurt feelings over how many times she found herself flat on her back, the wind knocked out of her, her world turning in a dizzy spin of dancing twinkling lights and floaters in her vision. As soon as she would feel the tears at the backs of her eyes, she would look over at Ta'ole and could practically read the Klingon's mind. 'Get up, Human. Do not embarrass us here!' She would struggle upward, ready to be assaulted again.

After months, however, Shanna wound up on her back less and less. That was when she had graduated to the polearm.

And now the curved sword. She had a strange feeling about the use of this particular weapon. "I am ready. Bring your sword to mine," she remarked to Shiltaf.

Ta'ole heard her words and gooseflesh rose up her arms.

Shanna circled Shiltaf slowly, watching her closely, waiting for her to- when she struck, she was ready. The two crossed swords for a short time and then Shanna found herself on her back. She did a rapid-roll out of the way of Shiltaf's relentless pursuit and then was back up off of the ground and on her feet, ready to cross swords again.

And then Ta'ole saw something she had never seen before from Shanna during combat training. A smile.

I have created a monster… she realized. And I am pleased.

"She is almost ready for the combat trials," Telqal whispered to the Klingon.

"She is."

"Next year."

"Next year," she agreed. But there was something else that needed to be addressed.

##

Things were quiet as they walked back to the embassy together later that day. Shanna was quiet in a way Ta'ole had not seen in some time. She was usually either wound up or very sad after training.

But there was something about her today, a quiet stillness she had never seen her possess.

"Shanna?" Ta'ole said, unsure of how to begin this conversation.

"My lady?" she asked as she turned her silver eyes to regard the woman walking next to her.

Yes… even the steadiness of her gaze was different. What is happening inside her mind? "Your husband. Why have you not told him of your association with the Sisterhood?"

Shanna didn't know exactly how she was going to explain what it was she was doing and why. There was a long pause, at first. Finally, "My lady, how long have you and the ambassador been married?"

She scoffed. "Much too long."

Shanna could only laugh at that answer. "Siranon and I have been married a little less than five years, and yet… so much has happened." She felt like for the first time in a long time she was seeing things clearly without an excess of emotions attached. "We were like a whirlwind. We got together so quickly…"

Ta'ole had often wondered, how had the two of them wound up married? She had even wondered, at first, if they were not a diplomatic creation for their particular house to secure the Mashtiq embassy. She had known Amanda and Sarek for so long, thought perhaps the magic of that old relationship was forcefully being recreated for official reasons. She saw quickly, though, that their relationship was quite real. And now this young one had much to say about the things she was beginning to realize.

"I do not know or understand why, but I have reached this crossroads inside myself. I'm realizing some things that- I came to rely on him, his steadiness, his influence... his approval too much." Shanna shook her head. "I needed to get the point. I'm more than just his wife. I am still me. The daughter of a woman that once showed up to an embassy function with glitter in her hair. I'm a scientist and graduate of The Vulcan Science Academy with dreams of Daystrom in my future, a student of cultures, a lover of every forbidden confection you can imagine- I have no idea how I found myself so far from home for so much of the year."

As she spoke, more and more realizations were coming to the surface. "It started to feel like I was losing pieces of myself while he seemed to remain largely intact. I know that's not fair now, though, because he's been changed in ways no one else can tell. It's not his fault he's able to hide it better than I am." She also thought of how Siranon had had to hide information from her on their way there, tamping down the burn of resentment from that, still. "I'm more than just the companion that shows up with the ambassador, with no official title, but responsible for half his failures and successes." She sighed deeply. "I wanted something of my own, something for myself, here at this post."

Ta'ole knew exactly what she meant. "Yes. The very thought at times can cut deeply. So much is expected of us."

Shanna exhaled, relieved that Ta'ole was not chastising her for her thoughts. "He returns from his day and does not tell me of what it is he had to contend with. And I don't ask, because I know he won't tell me. And it's difficult to know, how do you support someone who has a job where they can't tell you just how stressed out they might happen to be?"

Ta'ole stopped in her tracks and looked into the silver eyes of the human young woman. "Did you think to pay him back by withholding information about your day, young one?"

Shanna hadn't expected that question. At first she was poised to deny such a petty thing. But then she kept her mouth shut. What Ta'ole had assessed was pretty close to the truth. She didn't like thinking of herself in such a light.

"Do you wish to be in a state of warfare with he who is your husband?" Ta'ole asked next.

"Warfare?" Shanna asked, wondering where that question had come from.

"When is the last time your husband reamed you out in the bedchamber?" she asked knowingly, a smirk on her proud features.

Shanna wanted to fall into the ground and cover herself with sand, her contemplative peace from earlier all but gone. "Whaaat?"

"He has not given you proper attention in quite some time, I can tell," she said confidently. "It is time for you to demand punishment."

Shanna burst into embarrassed laughter because there was nothing else she could think to do under the circumstances. "From warfare to the bedchamber?"

"They are closely related!" Ta'ole insisted with a laugh.

Shanna was walking rapidly then trying to get away from the conversation. So what, Siranon and her had barely touched physically in quite some time! So what! He was a Vulcan, his work was demanding and he didn't seem to need physical contact very often. And frankly after the devastation of the last few years, neither had she. But they were also barely talking, and that was the real problem. What were things turning into between them? Was she upset with him about all of this and secretly training as a form of revenge? Revenge combat? What the hell? I have been spending too much time with Ta'ole…

"You need to speak truly with him," said Ta'ole. "Tell him everything. Tell him of your activities and your feelings, human. Tell him your thoughts."

She groaned. "One doesn't talk about feelings with Vulcans, my lady."

"Then he should have married a Vulcan!" she said with a fierceness in her tone.

Shanna felt like she was hearing her mother in that voice. "I'll give all of this some thought."

But Ta'ole was concerned that she would not. "Do as I say, human. Tell him all. And then sit on his face!" she roared with laughter.

"OH!" she squeaked, fully scandalized that she had said such a thing.

##

At the same time, Siranon sat behind his desk at work. He had gone over the latest dispute between two clans on this world. It was one of those moments of futility where all he could do was watch what was happening. Because without an explicit invitation to intervene… he sighed tiredly as he put his PADD down.

His mind trailed off to his own conflict, or the lack thereof. He admitted that he had become so tied up with his duties, once again, that he was completely unaware of what was happening with his wife's days. He had automatically assumed that she was tied up with Ananda and Henry, their upbringing, and education. Another part of him smarted. Why did he assume that was the entirety of her day? More importantly, he chastised himself for not asking. He had meant to ask of her plans, her next step before applying for Daystrom in a few years. But he had not.

He thought back to the last meaningful conversation they had had. Lewis' accident was somewhat of a final straw. It was within his power to use his influence to find out how the boy was doing, and he had not. He told himself, if Shanna asked him, he would do it. But she had not asked him, so he had not done so. Some part of him knew, she was afraid to ask him. He realized, belatedly, he should have done it anyway. It would have gone a long way to assauging her concerns since she was so far away unable to help.

And to the other part of their issues- part of him knew, he was afraid to touch her. After what had happened to both of their children produced together, an inner spring of panic rose at the thought of them naturally reproducing together, again. Losing them had been devastating. But he had almost lost her in the process, so close did she hover between life and death that last time. What would happen next time? He did not wish to find out.

How long do you plan on avoiding physical contact with she who is your wife? He knew avoiding these things was not sustainable. It was time to give constructive thought on how to fix this. But did she even want to repair the damage between them? It was time he faced these things, head on.