Author's Note: And now, at long last, the last chapter of this story…

Nothing Lost

Chapter 51

"Katie, there you are."

"Hi, Dad." Kate managed a smile and stepped into her dad's hug of greeting.

"Rick didn't come with you?" Her dad peered into the hall as if he thought Castle might be lurking around a corner.

"He's picking up lunch for us and will join us soon." Castle had, with a tact and sensitivity that probably shouldn't have surprised her, volunteered to get lunch for them, giving her privacy with her dad even without her asking.

"Oh, okay. You look like you're ready to go back to work, Katie. Is that why you and Rick came into town, for you to meet with the new Captain about coming back?"

"No, it's not that." Kate sat down on the couch in her dad's living room. "Come and sit down, Dad. I have to tell you something."

Her dad looked curious but not overly concerned as he sat down in the armchair he favored. "What is it, Katie?"

Kate released a steadying breath as she met her dad's eyes, noticing with fresh eyes the lines around his eyes and mouth, the added gray in his hair, how much older he looked these days than he had before her mom had died and knew at least some of that, if not most of it, was due to her mom's death and his own struggles afterward, more than the mere passage of time. "The reason Castle and I came into the city today—it's about mom's case," she started as gently as she could.

But of course, there was no way to soften the impact of the words, any reference to her mom's case. Her dad stiffened, his expression darkening with worry and grief, as always when her mom's case came up. "What's happened?"

"It's over, Dad, we got him, the man behind it all. He's just been arrested."

Her dad reared back in shock and then his eyes shut as he hunched forward, covering his face with his hands. She leaned forward to touch a hand to her dad's knee and he slowly lowered his hands, scrubbing them down his face, and looked up, his eyes now wet. "Tell me everything," he rasped unsteadily, his voice sounding unlike him.

And she did. Even after Raglan's death months ago, she hadn't told her dad what she'd discovered, had only told him afterward that Raglan had been a crooked cop and that was why he hadn't tried to solve her mom's case and he'd been killed to keep from talking about his corruption. But now, for the first time, she told him all she'd uncovered about the Raglan and McAllister kidnapping and extortion ring, told him about the murder of Bob Armen and Pulgatti being framed, and how her mom had gotten involved. She told him about Bracken's involvement, all his schemes to gain power. The only thing she did not tell her dad was Montgomery's identity as the third cop involved in the kidnapping scheme; she made it sound as if Montgomery had only discovered the identity of the third cop, also deceased, just before his death and then learned about Bracken and set in motion the FBI investigation. It was a long story and a complicated one, and for a moment, she wished Castle was there, storyteller that he was, to make the telling better, easier, but this was something she needed to do on her own.

"Agent Shaw has been keeping me updated and that's why Castle and I came into town. Agent Shaw arrested Bracken less than an hour ago, and he's been taken into custody."

Her dad listened, his face seeming to age years, slow tears sliding down his face before he wiped them away, and then abruptly lurched to his feet, moving a few steps away into the kitchen, resting his hands on the counter.

She watched him, her throat tight with emotion, the fear she would never put into words but always reared its head whenever her mom's death, her mom's case, came up, the fear that her dad would relapse.

He wasn't going to fall again, she assured herself. This was a good thing, would not make him fall again. And her dad was stronger now, recovered. He'd stayed sober even after her shooting; he could handle this. As her mom would say, life never delivers anything that we can't handle. Her eyes stung with threatening tears. "Dad?" She tried but even to her own ears, she sounded hesitant and yes, afraid.

Her dad sniffed and lifted a hand to swipe at his face again before he turned to face her, returned to the armchair. His eyes were reddened but he looked somewhat calmer. "He's been arrested? And you're sure he'll be convicted so this is really over?"

Her dad of all people, married to a criminal defense lawyer for more than 20 years, knew that an arrest didn't always lead to a conviction. "I'm sure. Agent Shaw is good at what she does; Montgomery knew that and I believe it. It's why this has taken so long, because she wanted to be sure the evidence was solid, beyond a reasonable doubt."

Her dad nodded, looking down at the floor and then up again, his lips twisting. "Bracken," he repeated grimly. "I've met him."

She flinched a little. She supposed she shouldn't be surprised—Bracken was a lawyer too, after all, and the legal community in the city could be a surprisingly small world—but the thought still hurt, the extra layer of betrayal. "Oh." She hesitated but had to know. "And mom?"

Her dad sucked in a shaky breath, wincing, and she knew the answer. "Your mom and Bracken were opposing counsel a few times."

"So Mom would have known Bracken was a formidable opponent?" She couldn't imagine her mom had ever suspected Bracken could be as dangerous as he was but oh, for a fleeting moment, she almost wished her mom had been a different type of person. The type of person who would have taken the easy way, stayed safe.

"You knew your mom, Katie. She tried to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and she was never the type to be intimidated. Once she made up her mind that something was the right thing to do, not even a tornado could have made her budge from her path." He managed a faint ghost of a smile. "Where do you think you get your iron will from?"

She heard in her mind Castle's remembered voice. Most people come up against a wall, they give up. Not you. You don't let go. You don't back down. That's what makes you extraordinary.

She had heard about her physical resemblance to her mom so much; it was, perhaps unsurprisingly, what most people who had known her mom noticed about her first. And while Kate accepted it as a compliment since her mom had been beautiful—she personally thought her mom had been more beautiful than she herself would ever be—but oh, a comparison to her mom's character meant so much more. For a moment, she felt almost like the little girl she had been, the one who'd worshipped her mom as a superhero, the one who'd been convinced her mom had no flaws.

No, she could never wish for her mom to have been anything less than what she had been because her mom had truly been the extraordinary one. Her throat was tight with emotion. Her mom had done what was right and as much as it hurt, she knew that mattered.

Her dad paused, sniffed, and tried for a faint smile that was somehow more evocative of wistfulness and sadness than tears. "Your mom did get the better of Bracken a couple times, getting her client acquitted or off on minor charges. She said those were the wins that meant more, because he was a tough opponent and she respected that."

Kate pictured Bracken's face, his granite expression, not the face of a man who accepted defeat. She'd lived in the male-dominated world of law enforcement long enough to recognize that Bracken was also the type of man to whom defeat at the hands of a woman would rankle even more. So her mom's victories in the courtroom would have added a personal edge to Bracken's motives, made him quicker to decide her mom would have to go. She felt another surge of cold rage at the thought—but then remembered, too, that it had been another woman, Agent Shaw, who had arrested Bracken. And Bracken knew that Kate herself had been behind his downfall too.

She attempted a faltering almost-smile and said, not entirely steadily, "As Mom would say, the truth is powerful and wins in the end. And she was right. She has justice now. She can be at peace."

Her dad leaned forward and reached out to grasp her hand. "I know, Katie-bug, and I always believed that somehow, you would succeed in getting justice for your mom. You always have succeeded at anything you put your mind to."

She sniffed, feeling her eyes grow damp. "Oh, Dad…"

"I know what this means to you, what it means to me. To know the truth. Your mom always said the truth could hurt but it also heals, in time."

Her lips trembled. "As usual, Mom was right."

"Yes, and I can almost hear her say, I told you so."

She choked on something that was a laugh and a sob combined.

Her dad's faint smile faded as he met her eyes, lifting his other hand to touch her cheek, brush an errant strand of hair that had slipped free behind her ear. "But Katie-bug, listen, what made your mom happy, and what I know would let her truly be at peace now, is not about your mom's case. It never has been. As much as today means, to both of us, I want you to remember that your mom didn't need her case to be solved in order to be at peace. What your mom always wanted most was for you to be happy. It's what I want most too." He sighed. "I've always worried that your mom's case took up too much of your life, that you were letting your mom's case get in the way of your future. But this summer, as tough as it has been, for the first time in years, I haven't been as worried about that. It seemed like you'd finally decided to live for yourself, to allow yourself to be happy. And that's what matters most to me, what I know would matter most to your mom."

A choked sob escaped her, hot tears burning her eyes, blurring her vision. "Dad, I…" Her voice failed her. She hadn't been unhappy in the last years but…

Her dad leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "I know, Katie-bug," he murmured. "I just want you to think about it."

She nodded but couldn't speak through the emotion clogging her throat and wasn't sure what she could say as it was.

"I'm proud of you, Katie, and I know your mom is too." He touched his fingers to her chin in a gentle caress that echoed one of her mom's habitual gestures. "Our fearless Katie-bear."

A watery hiccup that might almost have been the beginnings of a laugh emerged from her mouth. 'Katie-bug' had always been her dad's preferred moniker, one he'd never stopped using, although he was careful never to use it when anyone else was around, with the hospital and Castle being the sole exception to that. 'Katie-bear' was, for reasons that had been lost in the mists of time or her baby-hood, the pet-name her mom had generally used when Kate had been young, gradually falling out of use by the time Kate was a pre-teen. Her mom was the only person who'd ever called her 'Katie-bear,' until today. And oh god, how she missed her mom.

She sagged into her dad's embrace. "Oh, Dad, I miss her so much." The words came out in a muffled wail against his shoulder.

Her dad hugged her. "I know, I miss her too," he murmured.

She seemed to have run out of tears at least so she didn't cry, only hugged her dad, her face buried in his shoulder. Her dad didn't say anything more, no comforting bromides; he only held her as they mourned together. And just the mere fact that she knew he, of all people, understood exactly how she felt, was somehow enough. It was, she was painfully aware, what she had not had in the years her dad had been drowning, being able to share their grief but in the last few years, since her dad's recovery, they were able to grieve together—and heal together—and that made all the difference.

She wasn't sure how much time passed—perhaps a couple minutes—before she and her dad both started at the sound of a knock on the door. She hurriedly swiped at her wet eyes. "That must be Castle," she managed.

"Oh, of course. I'll let him in." Her dad stood up, running a hand down his face, and went to open the door.

She instinctively tried to snap her emotional shields back into place, the way she always had when anyone else was around—and then pulled up short as she heard Castle's voice greeting her dad. Felt a sense of relief as she realized that she didn't need to hide her emotions, not with Castle. Not ever again.

Her makeshift shield fell away as she stood up and moved to greet Castle, earning a glance of quick concern and some surprise as she tucked herself against his side, sliding her arm around his waist, a more demonstrative posture than she would normally have permitted herself in her dad's presence but she wanted this closeness at the moment. Castle slid his arm around her, even as he continued addressing her dad. "I wasn't sure what you'd feel like having for lunch so I got salad and a couple different kinds of sandwiches and some pasta too and for dessert, I picked up some cupcakes, because I figured a treat was in order. Does that sound okay?"

"It sounds great, Rick, thank you. And from the looks of it, I think you brought at least twice as much food as we'll need."

"Always better to have too much and then have leftovers is my philosophy," Castle responded.

"Johanna used to say the same," her dad said, managing to keep his voice steady as he mentioned her mom, the person on all of their minds, and somehow, having her mom mentioned eased the fine species of tension in the air from all the suppressed emotions.

Her dad busied himself setting the table while Castle turned to her. "Hi," he greeted quietly. She knew he noticed the evidence of her tears, concern darkening his eyes. And she loved him for not asking if she was okay, unnecessary as the query would have been, or otherwise expressing his worry. He was simply there for her if she needed it.

"Come and sit down, you two," her dad spoke up. "Rick, Katie, what would you like to drink? I have soda or iced tea or coffee, and of course water."

She and Castle both volunteered to get their own drinks but her dad waved them off and they obediently sat down at the table and let her dad play the host.

"The news is starting to break," Castle told them as her dad sat down. "I expect you both might start to get some phone calls or messages from your friends soon enough. I caught some of Agent Shaw's press conference while picking up lunch and she mentioned you specifically, Beckett, crediting you with leading the investigation at the early stages and passing vital evidence to the FBI."

Oh. She hadn't expected that and wasn't sure how to react.

Her dad reached out to pat her hand. "You deserve it, Katie."

"I was only doing my job," she demurred, her throat a little tight, and left unsaid what they all also knew, that she had done it for her mom.

"The FBI spokesman also said that they weren't going to release the names of Bracken's victims to the public until after they've spoken with the families but I imagine the names will be released by the end of the day."

Which meant there was going to be a lot of publicity bringing up the details of her mom's murder and the other murders. Oh god. She met his eyes and summoned up a wan attempt at a smile. "I guess it's lucky that your place in the Hamptons is so private then, give us a place to hide."

Castle's eyes softened, gave her a small, private glimmer of a smile, before turning to her dad. "You're welcome to return to the Hamptons anytime, Jim. You have an open, standing invitation."

"Thank you, Rick, I appreciate it and I'll take you up on that sometime but I think I can manage for now. I'm not some public figure people are likely to recognize."

Oh, but Castle was and he'd been at the arrest, linking him with the investigation too. "Have you talked to Martha and Alexis, warned them?"

"Yes, I talked to Alexis and left a message for my mother. They'll be okay; my mother's had some experience with handling publicity."

The rest of lunch passed quietly. Her dad and Castle carried on a brief conversation about how Martha and Alexis were doing but for the most part, they were all content to eat in silence, broken only by a few desultory comments, but the silence was a comfortable and somehow comforting one. Proof if she'd needed it of how at ease her dad was in Castle's company.

She and Castle left her dad's apartment after they finished lunch and dessert, with her dad wrapping his arms around her in a tight, lingering hug as if he was momentarily reluctant to let her go and then giving Castle a hug too, making Castle blink. She felt a pinch of emotion at this evidence of the growing bond between these two most important people in her life.

And the thought reminded her that there was one more thing she needed to do, one more person for Castle to meet.

She turned to Castle once they were outside again. "Will you come with me to see my mom?" she asked, her voice not entirely steady.

His expression changed, softened, as it usually did at any mention of her mom. He understood the significance of her question—of course he did. "I would be honored," he answered quietly.

She gave him a small smile at that and then they were on their way with her giving him quiet directions to the cemetery.

Her steps slowed and she reached out to grip Castle's hand as she led him the familiar way through the other tombstones to her mom's grave. The last time she'd been here had been—oh god—just days before Captain Montgomery's death, she remembered. She had visited a couple days before that for Mother's Day and then had come the call about Lockwood murdering McAllister and everything spiraling out of control and she had come here, to her mom's grave, as she so often did when she needed comfort or reassurance or a reminder of why she did what she did.

Her mom's grave, the most sacred spot in her life, the most private place in her life. She had never visited her mom's grave with anyone else except her dad and even so, she and her dad tended to visit her mom's grave separately. To mourn in their own private ways the wife and the mother they had respectively lost.

But it was time. This was right.

Castle's steps hitched and he paused, turning to her in sudden dismay. "I don't have flowers. I should have thought—I didn't bring anything—"

Oh, this man. She briefly stepped in to hug him. "It's okay, Castle. My mom will understand."

"But still…"

She gently tugged on his arm and they went on together but he hesitated, let her take the final step to stand in front of her mom's tombstone alone, as if to give her a semblance of a moment alone with her mom.

Her eyes blurred with sudden hot tears at the familiar Latin motto, Truth conquers all—because it had. Finally, after all these years, the truth her mom had fought for had conquered.

She swiped the tears out of her eyes with her free hand. "We did it, Mom," she managed, her voice a little scratchy with emotion. "We caught him—Bracken. He's been arrested. It's over and you won." She tightened her grip on Castle's hand, bringing him in against her side, her eyes flickering up to meet his for a moment. "And I wanted you to meet my partner, Rick Castle." If she shut her eyes, she could picture her mom's expression, had imagined introducing her mom to Castle so many times lately. "And yes, he is the Richard Castle."

"It's an honor to meet you, Mrs. Beckett," Castle greeted quietly, as naturally as if her mom were really there.

The gossamer-thin facade that this was a normal introduction dissolved and she tucked her face into his shoulder, his arms closing around her. "My mom would probably be acting like a fangirl on meeting you for the first time."

A faint smile tipped up the corners of his mouth. "Another reason why I'm sure I would have liked her."

Her lips trembled into a pale facsimile of a smile. "She would have liked you, even more than my dad does."

"You think so?"

"I'm sure of it."

"I wish I could have met her."

"Me too." Her throat tightened and she rested her face on his shoulder again as she blinked back the prick of tears. He simply held her, brushing his lips against her hair. And somehow, being held like this, surrounded by his warmth and his strength, made the ever-present ache of missing her mom seem to hurt less. "When my mom died," she began quietly, just a faint tremor in her voice, "I thought I would never be happy again." It was true. And while she could recognize, now, that the sentiment was a sign of how young she'd been at the time, it had also come true, like a self-fulfilling prophecy. She had taught herself to stand alone, had protected herself by keeping everyone at a distance. She had survived. But no, she had not really been happy, had not allowed herself to be happy, like her dad had said, as if in an obscure corner of her heart she hadn't felt as if she deserved it when her mom's case was still unsolved.

But then she'd met Castle and he had shaken her defenses with all his disarming humor and his warmth and yes, his attractiveness, and perhaps most of all, his cleverness that challenged her, threatened to draw her out of her own self-imposed shell. She had kicked him out for looking into her mom's case—fitting and yet somehow ironic too, now—but then he'd come back, when the truth about Captain Montgomery's betrayal, his past, and then his death, along with everything that had come out about her mom's case, had weakened her defenses almost to the breaking point. He'd come back when she'd needed a friend like him—had come back because she'd needed a friend.

And now thinking about it, it seemed almost inevitable that she and Castle would end up here like this because, somehow, in spite of everything—or maybe because of everything, their differences and their pasts with their different hurts and the jagged edges left by those hurts—they fit, magnetically pulled towards each other like opposite poles drawn together.

She lifted her head to meet his eyes. "My dad said I haven't really allowed myself to be happy and he was right. But you—you make me happy, Castle, happier than I thought I could be. You make me laugh, you make me think, you make me better."

"Kate…" He trailed off, as if for one of the few times in his life, he had no words.

And now, finally, she found the words she needed to tell him. "I'm in love with you."

His eyes, his entire expression, lit with so much love and joy it almost hurt to see and she felt a ball of emotion expanding, filling her chest. She'd thought—believed—that he'd known that she loved him and yes, he probably had, but she hadn't realized how much it would mean to him to hear the words. Maybe because he was a writer, someone who valued words so much, made his living with words, he might have known that she loved him but he'd still needed to hear the words too. "I love you, Rick," she said again. The words came easier the second time and it seemed as if she could almost taste the truth of the words on her lips. Because she did love him, loved him as she would never, could never, imagine loving anyone else.

His arms tightened around her so much it almost cut off her breath and then he was kissing her, kissing her as if the world had become a vacuum and she was the only source of oxygen in it.

She kissed him back for a moment but then, reluctantly, turned her face aside, softening it by brushing her lips to his chin. "Not in front of my mom, Castle," she managed.

He huffed something that was almost a laugh. "Right." He turned his head to address her mom's tombstone. "Excuse me, Mrs. Beckett. I find your daughter irresistible and sometimes, I just can't help but kiss her. She's like my kryptonite."

A bubble of laughter escaped her. Oh, this ridiculous, adorable man. "Castle."

He turned back to meet her eyes, his expression now entirely sober, sincere. "I love you too, Kate. I've always loved you and I always will love you."

"Always," she repeated softly and the word was both a confirmation and a promise, all in one.

He kissed her again, briefly this time, and afterwards, she buried her face in his shoulder, breathing in his familiar scent, and let herself sink into him, enjoy the feeling of being entirely wrapped up in him. And for that moment, in the quiet of the cemetery, it was as if they were the only two people in the world.

She lifted her face to smile at him, her heart lighter than it had been in months, maybe even years. And she knew what she wanted. "Take me home, Castle, back to the Hamptons."

"Whatever you want, Kate."

She stepped back from his embrace and clasped his hand again, her arm tucked inside his, keeping him close as they turned to leave.

She glanced back at her mom's tombstone, focusing on her mom's name, and she heard her mom's well-remembered voice in her mind. Be happy, Katie, and I will be too.

She was happy, would be happy, with Castle. She turned back to meet Castle's eyes, the love and the understanding in them.

"We could stay longer if you want," he offered quietly.

"No, it's okay. It's time." Time to move on.

He nodded and they started to walk, returning to where they'd left his car.

Back inside the car, he paused before starting it. "So what happens now?"

She smiled at him. "Everything that comes after," she answered simply.

"You'll still be a detective?"

Surprised, she considered it, her smile fading. She had become a cop because of her mom, in order to solve her mom's case. She remembered what he'd told her once, just after they'd met, that she'd had options. Now, her mom's case was solved. But that wasn't all there was. "Yes. Being a cop, it's not only about my mom anymore. It's who I am." Who she had become. She hadn't really stopped to think about it but it was true. She might not have originally intended to be a cop but now, after so many years, after Montgomery's training, being a cop—being Detective Beckett—was part of who she was. If this past summer of not being able to work had proven anything, it was that. "Besides," she added, teasing coloring her tone, "I seem to remember agreeing to be a certain writer's muse."

He didn't laugh. "You'll always be my muse, no matter what you do. It's not your job that inspires me; it's you."

"I know. But it's true, being a cop is who I am now. It might not be easy but I don't think I could work some normal office job, not anymore. I like the challenge, solving cases and, yes, finding justice for other victims. It matters to me, knowing I can do my part to make sure another family doesn't have to deal with a cop who doesn't care."

He gave her a faint, tender smile. "That's my kickass detective." He might have asked about her plans to remind her she had options and he would still be there for her, but he was not surprised at her answer.

She returned his smile. "And I'll have a partner, who'll make my job more fun."

His smile widened. "It's a deal. Partners."

She reached out and took his hand. "Partners. But first, I just want to spend a few weeks with you and not think about anything else." She still had some weeks of physical therapy to go through but other than that, she just wanted to be with him, together, without her mom's case hanging over them. It was the sort of admission she would never have made before, the sort of thing she'd never felt before. She felt color creeping into her cheeks at his expression and took refuge, as usual, in humor. "Unless you think you'll get bored spending so much time with only me for company?"

"Bored, with you? I'm pretty sure I could spend 100 years with you and not get bored."

"There you go again with the hyperbole."

"Have I mentioned that you are so hot when you use literary terms?"

"Onomatopoeia," she deadpanned.

"That might be the sexiest thing I've ever heard you say."

"You should hear me say 'fallacious,'" she quipped, throwing him a look from beneath her lashes.

He laughed and leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Definitely the sexiest woman ever."

She lifted her hand to his cheek, turning his face to kiss his lips briefly once and then again, for good measure. "Come on, Castle, let's go home." To his house in the Hamptons, which was home for now, but really, wherever they were together would be home.

"As you wish."

They exchanged smiles and then he started the car and they were on their way, to return to the Hamptons, to start the rest of their lives.

~(Almost) The End~

A/N 2: Just an epilogue to go. Thank you to everyone who's stuck with me through this long story. I only hope this last chapter has been worth the wait.