The beach party was a disaster.
The sun was already about to set when Claire Farron arrived at the designated place.
She had gotten home, taken a shower, taken a short nap and had forced herself out of her bed and into one of Serah´s more stylish summer dresses about an hour later, suddenly determined to go.
She hadn´t done anything fun in a very long time and she thought she felt strong enough that day. She was a genetically modified super soldier, surely she could handle a few hours in a deck chair.
Piece of cake as Zack would say.
It was late when finally she entered the promenade that led to the beach and the party was already in full swing. There was fancy music and the sound of voices and the smell of fires greeting her before she could even see the bar, the people, the multicolored seats and tents.
Reaching the shore she pulled off her sandals to feel the sand on the bare skin of her feet.
It was still warm.
Warm and reassuring.
Made her feel relaxed and safe, more confident.
Tonight was going to be a good night, she decided there and then.
Tonight she was going to talk to Sephiroth.
Yes...
Their silence had lasted long enough.
Tonight she was going to set things straight.
Things could not go on like this much longer.
Tonight everything would turn alright.
She kept repeating those sentences in her head again and again as she fought her way through the throng of people, trying to make her way over to the bar where she thought she´d glimpsed a strand of Genesis´ crimson hair.
She had half reached the place when she stopped dead in her tracks and the good mood she´d been talking herself into vanished into thin air.
The silver haired man she´d been hoping to meet was nowhere to be seen. But in his place there was that annoying brunette woman leaning against the bar at Genesis´ left, Cloud, Zack and Lebreau lounging somewhere close to them. Angeal was nowhere to be seen either...
Great. Fang...
This was proving to become a jolly evening for sure.
Forcing herself to approach them nonetheless, it was the second she took a step forward that she found her two missing comrades join the party from the other side of the bar.
Sephiroth and Angeal.
And she felt her heart beat significantly faster at the sight of them. Of him. Felt that strange fluttery feeling at the pit of her stomach again at the prospect of talking to him.
Of hearing his low husky voice.
Of being close to him...
Her heart plummeted and crashed into the ground though when she saw the brunette woman rushing forward to greet the man of her dreams with a hug. A hug that seemed pretty welcome to the silver haired First Class since he didn´t seem to have threatened to hack her hands off yet.
Lightning felt her heart ache.
He´d never greet her with a hug anymore. He'd never done that to begin with. Then again would she have wanted that?
No. I would have felt all wrong...
Still, the way the general was looking at the brunette nuisance, smiling at her even, it made Claire Farron's insides turn to tar.
That smile...
It had taken her years to pry one out of him.
A feat Oerba Yun Fan seemed to have accomplished the very day they met.
Somehow it was all so cruel. Wrong. So twisted.
Why was he smiling at that girl like this.
Because he likes her... That small treacherous voice inside her head piped up.
No. Impossible.
He couldn't like her, not like that, or could he?
Of course he can... Why wouldn't he? You treated him like shit. The voice provided readily.
Why would he choose you when he could have cheery pretty witty admiring Fang?
The realisation of it made Lightning's insides burn, made her heart clench uncomfortable.
It was true. She hadn't treated him very lovingly, had pushed him away on plenty of occassions.
She had been rude. Cruel even. Hadn't really given him a chance.
Why again had she been pushing him away like that?!
He'd wanted to be together with her hadn't he? Had bought a beachhouse for them to live in, had wanted them to be a family.
Why had she not even tried?!
Because you were scared. The voice inside spoke up.
Lightning knew that it was true.
She could have come up with a hundred reasons but in reality it all ran down to that.
She had been scared.
Scared of her feelings, of her own wants, scared of letting him in, scared of committing to something that only scared her more.
Scared of him. And that special bond they shared. Scared of who and what she was. They were.
Was scared still. She was aware.
But now that she had seen him with Fang, suddenly she realized that there was something that scared her even more.
The prospect of loosing him. The prospect of being without him. Of letting him go.
Watching the subject of her musings flirting shamelessly over at the counter of the bar, only a few few meters away from her really, Lightning felt her chest clench up, suddenly felt hard to breathe, to think.
Had she really lost him to that cow?
Him, the only man she´d ever really cared for?!
The only man who'd ever understand?
How could she have been so stupid...
How could she have let this happen?!
That party on the beach was just as any other Sephiroth had attended with his comrades since he had arrived there. Except of course for Fang.
It was the first of those nights that she attended with them and she seemed more excited than he had ever seen her before.
Angeal and he had taken a little longer to arrive and the others seemed to be half drunk already, especially the young brunette woman who greeted him with a hug and a few nice words.
It was weird... The way she seemed to feel so comfortable around him. It wasn't something he was used to. Noone had ever treated him like that back at Midgar, noone would have dared.
His authority really must have suffered a lot since they´d arrived at Bodhum. And so had his reputation.
Well. Noone here had ever seen him do anything remotely threatening. Sure, they'd heard some stories. But noone was aware of all the things he'd done, he could do, noone had seen the monster, the killer, the battle angel.
Not in action.
And Fang... Fang hadn't known the Sephiroth of Midgar either, the person he had been. There was no reason for her to back off in trepidation, to step out of his way as a means of self perservation or to kneel at his feet in awe. She only knew the new Sephiroth. The new and improved version. The one who allowed himself to show emotion, who was considerate of others and their feelings, the one who allowed himself to relax, to drop his guard, to have some fun, give second chances and to just enjoy the blissful simplicities of life that fate had never granted him before.
And it was around Oerba Yun Fang that being this new improved version felt most comfortable, came almost naturally.
'There you are!' the brunette woman had said, her green eyes sparkling up at him in amazement.
'I´ve been missing you, General...' she had added seductively as she had pulled him away from the others by his arm and over to the bar before he could even think to complain.
'Tequila for my handsome friend!' she ordered immediately, before she turned back to study his face, a huge smile plastered on her lips.
'I´ve been waiting for you all evening!' she explained, batting her eyelids in what she must have figured was a quite alluring way.
It made the general mentally facepalm himself.
What was it with girls never knowing when they had enough?
'You didn´t wait with the drinking, I fear.' the man in question answered somewhat chilly, but yes... It was amusing in a way, the way she seemed to sway there on her feet.
He´d never seen Lightning get herself drunk like this, or had he?
Yes, maybe he had... But he´d certainly never heard her call him her handsome friend.
No... She had more sense than that. More dignity.
Still... Did she even find him handsome?
Somehow Sephiroth wondered.
Lots of women did. Plenty of men even.
Still, Lightning had never expressed her opinion when it came to his looks.
Was he even her type?
Sephiroth didn't know.
'There you go!' Fang said, shoving the little glass into his empty hand before taking her own and bringing it up to her lips.
He wasn't sure whether there was a single breathing thing out there that didn't think he was their type.
'Cheers.' the woman beside him said before she downed the thing, just to order another round the second her empty glass hit the wooden surface of the counter.
General Sephiroth Crescent obediently followed her example.
He had wanted a break, right?
There was his chance.
He wasn't exactly the kind of person to drown their sorrows in alcohol but yeah... Considering everything that had happened those past few weeks... The thing with the dogsters, his mako cravings, the endless nightmares of his past, the thing with Lightning...
Especially Lightning...
Well, let's say those few sips of tequilla, the beach party, the music and the good mood were a most welcome distraction. And so was Fang.
That woman was like a resfreshing breeze on a humid summer day.
It was two shots later that the feeling of somebody´s eyes boring into the back of his head made him come back to his senses. Made him look up and study the crowd.
He was not in Midgar anymore. He was aware.
Still. He had not forgotten about constant vigilance. Wasn't even sure he could.
It was too deeply ingrained in his being, was a reflex really, a compulsion maybe.
Was part of who he was.
Checking the area around him he found Zack and Lebreau busily making out on one of the deck chairs and Cloud, Genesis and Angeal, at the bar right next to them deeply immersed in conversation that seemed to concern a group of ladies lounging near the waterline.
Watching around some more he glimpsed Yuj, Marqui and Gadhot, from the neighbourhood watch, dancing in the crowd, and even some of the other guardian corps members among the other guests enjoying themselves.
It was among a group of people he´d never seen before that suddenly he caught a glimpse of pink.
It was gone the second that he took a closer look.
Could it have been Lightning?
Suddenly he wasn´t sure.
She hadn´t attended a party in ages.
And he hadn´t seen her around much. Not even at work.
No, it couldn´t be her, right?
Right...
That Tequila was probably playing tricks on him already...
Or was it?
'Hey! How about a bath in the sea?!' Fang´s voice mercilessly ripped him out of his musings.
'I´ve never taken a bath in the sea before!'
Had he just spotted her there in the crowd?
Lightning wasn´t sure.
He had been staring into her direction for a couple of seconds, but she was pretty sure she had been hidden from his sight by a bunch of people.
Next thing she knew, he was talking to Fang again and she could only watch in horror as a few seconds later the pretty brunette started shedding her clothes to expose her smooth bronze skin and a tiny black bikini, the eyes of her fellow comrades bulging, it was Genesis who stood there with his mouth gaping stupidly while Zack had the decency to look away, if only for Lebreau´s sake.
'Come on guys!' Lightning heard the irritating female´s voice carry over to her hiding place as she motioned for them all to follow her down to the water, all the while tugging at the General´s uniform, a futile attempt from her side to make him take it off and join her.
Or that was what Lightning thought until a moment later the silver haired man, HER silver haired man, obediently shed his clothes to expose his perfect upper body, Cloud, Angeal and the redhead joining them immediately, as did the guys from the nighbourhood watch.
It was horrible to watch. Painful really.
It was carefully making her way over to the bar that Lightning watched the brunette newcomer throwing off the rest of her clothes, felt her hands curl into fists.
The stupid bitch was showing off her smoothly tanned skin, her gorgeous boobs and behind for all of her comrade´s to see and it was almost too eagerly that that bunch of idiots was ready to take off their shirts and shorts and expose their trained abs and toned upper bodies for the stranger to admire.
Ugh.
It was horrible.
Made her almost throw up again right there and then.
Fang´s attention was fixed on Sephiroth mostly as usual, as shamelessly she let her eyes roam his skin as if he were her´s and her´s alone.
UGH!
The beast inside her stirring, Lightning felt the almost irresistible urge to scratch that woman´s eyes out.
No.
She couldn´t watch this.
Not any longer, she thought as turning back to the bar she averted her eyes from the picture of the jolly party now jumping into the cool waves, splashing and laughing as they went.
She didn´t even want to think about what kind of stuff might be going on under the silent water´s dark surface...
Getting up from her seat she made her way over to the toilets. And quickly.
She felt tears coming again.
And she had no intention of letting anyone see them fall.
Never.
Things were humiliating enough as they were.
It was about an hour later that she returned.
Making sure that her face showed no trace of her prolonged crying session, she had checked in the bathroom mirror about a hundred times, the pink haired female made her way back to the party just to find her comrades at the bar again, fully dressed this time, thanks Etro.
It was only their damp hair that betrayed their skinny dipping session as leaning against the counter, they hadn´t wasted any time getting themselves drunk, it seemed.
Watching them from a safe distance away Lightning saw that Fang girl standing next to Sephiroth again, no, leaning against him actually. It seemed she had gotten herself so drunk she needed to have her arms around his neck as she was talking to him so she wouldn´t just sink to the ground.
The sight of it, it was making the pink haired first class want to turn around and flee the scene immediately, but it was Angeal Hewley who saw her first, who giving her one of his inviting smiles just waved her over.
Great.
She couldn´t just run away now that they´d seen her, could she?
No she couldn't. It would seem insane.
Making her way over to them with tiny tentative steps, Lightning came to stand somewhere next to Angeal with the rest of the group looking at her questioningly.
There was that awkward moment were all conversation ceased and even that Fang girl looked up at her to see what was going on. Dull green eyes gaping at her stupidly.
It took only a second though before everyone started talking again and the pink haired female stood there awkwardly, trying hard to evade those pretty mako eyes piercing her skull from the side now.
'Hey, you came!' Zack finally broke the ice after he managed to entangle himself from Lebreau, sky blue eyes smiling at her invitingly.
'You´re late, you´ve been missing out on an awesome nighttime swim!' Cloud threw in as he gave the blue haired member of the neighbourhood watch beside him a funny glance.
'Yeah... I´ve been missing out on a lot of things it seems.' Lightning answered, her voice suddenly very small, she wasn´t even sure the others could heard.
'How about a drink?!' Genesis offered, holding out a bottle of vodka for her to take a swig, but the pink haired first class refused immediately.
'No. Thanks. I... I can´t.'
It was true.
She was carrying a child after all.
She couldn´t afford to drink any alcohol, could she?
No.
As much as she hated the damn thing growing in her belly, she couldn´t bring herself to do that, to consciously harm it like that. Not anymore.
The redhead giving her one of his strange mysterious looks, her eyes involuntarily travelled upwards to meet Sephiroth´s curious green ones.
The man who had gotten her into that mess in the first place looking her dead in the eye, for a tiny moment there she wasn´t sure whether he knew about her secret. Whether he suspected. Whether he hadn´d known about it for quite some time now.
That one time he´d been touching her belly after her fight with that dogster thing...
Where he´d saved her from another wave of pretty uncomfortable pregnancy cramps...
He´d used their Jenova connection there.
Was there any possibility he´d found out right then?
The unsettling stare of the General making her squirm, Lightning quickly decided to look away again.
'What? No alc for you? Are you sure you´re okay?!' Cloud suddenly said, and she wanted to just hit him in the balls for it.
'No... I.. I think I´ve had too much already...' she quickly made up.
In a way it was true.
She´d had enough of it.
This party.
These people.
This situation.
This life...
Suddenly everything about it sucked.
Somehow in just a few weeks time all the beautiful things about Bodhum that she had loved so much, appreciated, had somehow turned stale, sour, empty.
The peaceful beaches of Bodhum, once the paradise of her childhood, home, her family, suddenly it had all turned into a nightmare.
Turning around on her heels, it was without another word that Claire Farron made her way back into the crowd and away.
Just away.
She needed to get away.
Cloud had said something about Lightning not drinking and suddenly she was off again. That comment had somehow offended her, or maybe it had been something else...
The woman he loved turning around to look back from a few meters away, General Sephiorth Crescent found her eyes fixed on his face, their gazes locking for an awkward moment, her stare cold and hostile, he tried and give her a reassuring smile.
It was only a second later that she turned to let herself get swallowed by the crowd entirely.
Lightning...
He felt the sudden urge to just go after her.
Yes, it had felt good to see her there. To know she was going out again. That maybe she was feeling better.
He had missed her.
Missed her a lot.
And the sight of her alone had made his heart give crazy hopeful flutters.
Yes. For a tiny milli second there he'd thought she migh have come to see him. To talk to him. To make up with him.
It had been wishful thinking of course. Was ridiculous. It was her who'd pushed him away in the first place. Her who'd made clear she didn't want him, any of it really.
And still...
'Hey... What´s wrong pretty boy?' Fang suddenly asked out of nowhere.
She´d been clinging to him all evening and it was really starting to go on his nerves, to get too much, or maybe it had become too much quite some time ago now.
How had he ended up with her arms around his neck in the first place?!
Suddenly he could not remember anymore.
Anyway, he didn´t even really hear her. His eyes following the pink haired First Class vanishing somewhere in the crowd, his attention was far away from the drooling woman right in from of him.
The cocky brunette removing one hand from his neck to actually touch his face, to make him look at her, it was just another futile attempt to catch his attention.
No... This had been going on for far too long.
Catching her wrist in a firm but gentle grip the silver haired man carefully put her hand away and back to her side, where surely it belonged.
No... There was only one person he´d ever let touch his face. And that person was definitely not Oerba Yun Fang.
'I´m sorry. I can´t.' he whispered as apology before gently pushing her away he was off.
Pushing his way through the crowd, it took him a few minutes himself before he managed to locate his comrade near the path that led away from the beach and back to the main road. A tiny pink dot fighting her way against the throng of people pushing to come in, he tried to move there faster to maybe reach her before she´d manage to leave the beach entirely
He wasn´t that lucky it seemed. Once she´d made her way outside she´d quickened her pace to a run, eager to get away from him it seemed.
Fighting his way against to incoming crowd there was nothing he could do to reach her in time. Well... Nothing sensible at least.
Shit...
'Sephiroth!'
Fang was suddenly behind him.
Had probably been from the beginning or she wouldn't have caught up so fast.
'What´s going on?' She asked as panting from the effort of keeping up, she gave him a slightly devastated look.
Quickly averting his eyes from his new colleague´s face he felt them land on Lightning again.
Just a tiny flash of pink hurrying down the street.
Gone again. Out of his reach.
If only she would talk to him...
'What... But...' The brunette choked out as .. she followed her comrade's gaze.
'Oh... I see...' she sighted finally before she made to look back at him again.
'You´ve got a crush on her, huh?!'
It made the silver haired general look up at her instantly.
He wasn´t sure `crush´ was exactly the right word to describe his feelings for the pink haired first class.
No... `crush´ was definitely not enough.
He only averted his gaze to the ground, to have it snap back to Fang´s face the second she ended her next words.
'But really. She´s not interested, I think.' the girl said somewhat casually as she watched the pink dot vanish in the darkness of the night.
'Seriously... I haven´t seen the two of you talk like ever since I got here.' she said, presenting the general with one of her dazzling smiles again.
'Or is this what excites you. A girl playing hard to get? A challenge?'
His eyes travelling back to the spot where Lightning had disappeared, Sephiroth felt his heart sink the second that he realized that it was true.
She hadn´t been talking to him in a long time, not if she could help it, had been evading him at all costs.
Letting the truth of it sink in, he gave a small frustrated sigh.
Then on the other hand, it´s been like this before. Hadn´t it?
It´s been like this a lot of times.
Back in Midgar.
And even here in Bodhum.
There'd been lots of times when they hadn't been on speaking terms, evading each other, …
Well, he'd hoped they'd be past that.
Apparently they weren't.
'It´s... Kind of complicated.' he said somewhat pensively.
And it was true.
It really was complicated above all else.
'I´m not complicated.' the tipsy woman offered inching closer again.
'Yeah, I can see that.' the general replied somewhat dryly.
No... He so wasn´t in the mood for this. Doubted he'd ever feel tempted by any of it ever again in his entire life.
Turning around on his heels to walk back to the bar, he heard Fang's voice pipe up from behind once more.
'Hey Sexy...'
He turned slowly, only begrudgingly this time, rewarding that stupid nickname she´d given him with an exasperated sigh.
'Think you could walk me home?' She asked, big green eyes pleading him to agree.
'I´m feeling terribly lost... Young girl... Big new city... Tons of monsters roaming the streets...'
She gave a tiny tipsy giggle.
'Uhm... Sure...' the general said, gritting his teeth, as feeling slightly stupid he followed the brunette woman back to the main street.
'There we are. You´re safe.'
The way back to Fang's hotel had seemed to stretch on forever and so had the woman´s constant babbling.
She was drunk of course.
But still...
She was starting to get on his nerves.
Maybe she should have asked Genesis to bring her home.
He always loved to brabble for hours himself...
Maybe they could have talked themselves into oblivion or something.
'Care to come in?' Fang suddenly said suggestively, leaning against the doorway to the local inn for support as not to tumble to the ground.
She was swaying on her feet there, looking up at him with big green puppy eyes that could have rivalled Zack's.
General Sephiroth Crescent felt his insides churn uncomfortably.
'No thanks.' he declined almost instantly.
She pouted.
'I´d rather not...' he stammered, fighting to find the right words.
Some magical words that would allow him to make her understand without hurting her feelings.
Well... Those words they stayed illusive.
'Sorry. I´m... I´m just not interested.' he finally said instead.
Well. At least it would convey the message.
'It's really her, isn´t it?' Fang suddenly said out of nowhere.
Giving him a knowing smile she made over to one of the little benches arranged infront of the hotel, made to sit down, beckoning him over.
The silver haired general, he only stared at her.
Suddenly she did not seem drunk at all.
'Come on everyone can tell... And the way she's staring daggers at me... It doesn't really take a genius...' she began somewhat eagerly.
Her tall silver haired companion not responding in the slightest, Oerba Yun Fang gave an exasperated sigh.
'So... What is it with her... Your chosen one?' she suddenly asked somewhat knowingly.
'I can sense some tension there between you two and I'm not talking about the good kind.'
It made the silver haired first class raise a brow.
It really was that obvious wasn't it?
'It is complicated...' He finally brought out again.
Fang gave him a knowing smile.
'I gathered there was something going on between the two of you, but sorry, I didn't gather it was aynthing serious.' she offered as some kind of explanation.
'It is serious.' the silver haired first class said sincerely. 'At least from my part.'
'Okay. So it's just friends then.' Oerba Yun Fang stated with a smile.
It made the general smile back.
'Friends.'
'Okay... So now we settled this... What is it that´s going on between yourself and Farron?' Fang asked eagerly, not bothering to hide her curiosity.
'I don´t know.' the general answered her truthfully.
Oerba Yun Fang only arched a brow. Drunk or not, she was no fool.
'We are frieds, right, you can tell me.' she cooed.
It made the silver haired first class join her on the bench with a tiny defeated sigh.
'I love her.' Sephiroth confessed.
The brunette woman´s gaze grew pensive.
'You should tell her.' she said somewhat dejectedly. Suddenly she didn´t seem drunk anymore at all, not even tipsy.
'She doesn´t seem to know.'
'Oh, she does know, trust me. I´ve told her at least a hundred times.' The silver haired man sounding resigned, Fang gently made to touch his shoulder.
'Maybe you ought to tell her again.'
Yes. Maybe he should. But how was he supposed to? Somehow she never listened. Shit she´d been running away from him half an hour before.
Again.
General Sephiorth Cresecent gave a devastated sight. Telling her was no use it seemed. No use at all.
'Or maybe she needs more. Sometimes a lady needs proof to be convinced.' the brunette woman said, a smirk now forming on her lips.
'More?' It made Sephiroth's brows ride up his forhead.
What more could he possible give her?
He poured out his heart in front of her.
Had put up with her stupid little games.
He'd bought her a beach house...
He cooked her dinner...
'Yeah... I don´t know... Write her a poem or something. Or maybe a song.' the crazy woman said.
That comment of her´s it earned her nothing but an incredulous stare and a shake of his head.
'Well... I do like poems.' Fang threw in somewhat suggestively.
'Genesis is the one for poems.' the general finally said.
It made the brunette woman giggle.
'Maybe you should try. Some woman need proof of a man's feelings. You know.. Things that cannot be bought with money. Things that cannot be expressed in words. Some kind of sign of your undying devotion for her. I mean everyone can squeeze out a few fancy words.'
It was measuring Fang up with his eyes that he made to shake his head again.
'I don't know Fang...I've been trying to talk to her. I've been trying to do things for her. I've tried everything. I... I... I'm not sure she even wants me. I mean she actually said she doesn't want me...' The silver haired first class stammered insecurely.
'She said she doesn't want you?' Oerba Yun Fang probed with raised brows.
'No... Not exactly...' Sephiroth clarified. 'She said... She doesn't want any of it.'
'It?' Fang prodded.
'I... I think I've been pushing too hard. I... I pressured her.. I didn't... I just wanted it so much... I guess she wasn't ready.' the silver haired first class revealed.
'We have history. And not the good kind. There's some tings... happened between us she might not be able to forgive...'
It made the woman beside him give a little smile.
'Well maybe you should try again.' she insisted amicably.
Yes maybe he should.
Her words made the general stare into the distance pensively.
Well maybe he really should.
'If only I knew -' he had barely started that last sentence of his when a flash of pink vanishing behind a corner registered somewhere in his peripheral vision.
'Sorry. I gotta go.' was all he offered as an explanation as he got onto his feet immedeately.
Yes. He would try again.
And this was his most welcome chance.
Swiftly turning away from the woman on the parkbench, he quickly made to walk away, broke into a run in fact, the second he was out of Oerba Yun Fang´s sight.
'Lightning?' he whispered once he had made it around the corner and into one of Bodhum´s darker streets.
She was nowhere to be seen.
Was that Tequila playing tricks on him for real this time?
No...
He knew what he´d seen.
She was there.
He sensed her presence.
Could probably sense it from a mile away.
What was she doing there?
Was she following him? Was she checking on him?
Could it... Could it be she missed him too? Could it be she wanted to talk to him?
'Lightning wait! I know you´re here.' he spoke into the darkness, but there was no answer. Only the dark silence of the abandoned alley.
It suddenly reminded him a lot of their very last encounter. The last time they'd been talking.
The memory was not a pleasant one.
A soft breeze carrying over from the sea tousling his still damp hair and the sound of some crickets chirring in some nearby bushes and suddenly there she was, out of nowhere, standing a few meters behind him.
He simply loved the way she could sneak up on him like that.
She was probably the only person in the world gifted with that ability.
Or at least she had been until he'd gotten so inattentive lately. So preoccupied.
He almost considered walking over to hug her, when he found the inviting smile he gave her met with one of her poisonous warrior scowls.
It made his heart sink almost instantly.
Sure... She hadn´t been following him around to make up, right?
He should have guessed.
The way she looked at him, it seemed more probable that she had come to kill him.
Slice open his thorso and tear out his insides to let him bleed dry right there in the streets.
'No good night kiss for your new girlfriend?' the pink haired woman spat acidly and Sephiroth felt his eyebrows riding up his forehead in surprise.
So that was what this was all about?
Fang?!
No that couldn´t be... That wasn't possible.
Or was it?!
'No.. What...?! Wait! She isn´t... It´s not like you think it is...' he tried somewhat carefully, but from that dangerous glint in the woman´s pale blue eyes he knew it was no use.
She had already made up her mind. That stubborn bitch.
There was a moment of silence were she only stared at him, looking as though she was going to scratch his eyes out, until suddenly she turned on her heels to bolt again.
The general was faster this time.
Sprinting after her it only took a few swift strides for him to catch her wrist and make her turn back to him.
'Wait, what are you doing here?'
He was already burning to find out. He really was.
She made no move to answer him. Instead her pretty pale blue eyes narrowed into two stubborn hostile slits and her lips set into a tight thin line. Instead of answering, the woman in front of him only kept scowling at him.
Sephiroth could only look at her in wonder.
Women were strange creatures at times.
'Don´t touch me!' Lightning finally barked at him instead of an answer and he could only stare at her completely perplexed, trying to understand what was going on in that pretty head of her´s.
'Light...' he tried to calm her.
This was a misunderstanding. He understood that now. Surely she would see that too once she looked at it the right way.
'Please, let me explain...'
His free hand slowly coming up to cup her face, he wanted nothing more than to hold her, to feel her close to him again.
The woman in front of him violently pushed his hand away.
'I said don´t touch me!' She almost yelled at him.
He let his hands drop away as if burned.
There was a devastated look there in her pale blue eyes and tears threatening to stream down her cheeks any second, he could tell.
Sephiroth didn´t know what to say.
What was it she wanted to hear?
The woman he loved giving a tiny disappointed shake of her head, she just turned away and ran, leaving him there in the empty streets utterly confused.
Would she ever give them another chance?
Probably not...
Or would she?
By the time she´d made it home, Lightning´s makeup was smeared from tears streaming down her face and her feet were sore from running all the way back.
She was unfortunate enough to run into Serah in the hall the second she came bursting through the doorway.
'Lightning! What´s going on?!' her sister cried out in surprise as she hurried over to tackle her in a tight hug.
Claire Farron couldn´t find the strength to answer, nor to complain, but just let her body sink to her knees, while her hands found her little sister´s shoulders and clutched on desperately.
'Hey... It´s okay... Everything´s okay...' Serah tried to calm her, arms tightly wrapped around her older sister´s body, hands patting her back reassuringly, it seemed to be no use. The weight of all the things that had happened in the past few weeks crushing down on her at once, Lightning found herself sobbing in her younger siblings arms uncontrollably.
'He... He doesn´t want me anymore...' she managed between heavy sobs.
'What... What are you talking about?' Serah asked, her voice dripping with concern as she released her older sister just enough to be able to look into her eyes.
'He... He´s... With Fang now...' Lightning whimpered defeatedly.
'What who? No... I don´t believe that.' Serah insisted, one of her hands coming up to brush away a few strands of pinkish hair that had fallen into the once tough soldier´s eyes before pulling out a handkerchief she started dabbing away at her tears and make up.
'Didn´t you see them? They´re together on every possible occasion... They have missions together, they drink together, they go skinny dipping together in the sea... He actually brought her home after the party...' the older woman sobbed helplessly.
'Did you tell him...?' Serah asked after a short pause.
She was talking about the baby of course. The horrible nightmare that was growing in her belly.
Lighting only shook her head.
No... Of course she hadn´t. What was she supposed to tell him in the first place?
'Claire, what do you want me to say... I can´t blame him...' her sister started carefully.
'You´ve been treating him like a stranger...'
'No, I didn´t.' Lightning countered instantly.
'You did!' Serah insisted matter-of-factly.
'You treated him worse actually. When was the last time you went out on a date with him? When was the last time you went skinny dipping in the sea with him?'
'Have you ever actually?'
Lightning only looked away.
She had. That one night at the beach, right after Serah's wedding. They'd been swimming in the sea together. Without any clothes whatsoever.
But that was like a hundred years ago.
While the date thing...
Well... Lightning wasn't sure they'd ever done anything together that could be considered a real date.
Except for that evening at his beach house maybe.
Yes. Surely that would count as a date. Wouldn't it?
'I haven´t seen the two of you together since... I can´t even remember, Claire.' Serah said sincerely.
'Do you two even talk at all?'
No...
The answer was 'no' of course.
Why was it that they had stopped talking again?
Why was it that they had stopped enjoying each other´s presence?
Why...?
Suddenly Lightning didn't know. Suddenly none of it made sense.
'You didn´t even tell him about the baby...' her sister reminded mercilessly.
Yes the baby...
It all came back to the baby, right?
Before the baby everything was fine.
That stupid thing, it had ruined everything.
Of course, it was all the baby´s fault! It was to blame for everything!
Damn that blasted thing!
Serah´s innocent blue eyes piercing her own as if trying to understand what was going on inside her sister's head, Lightning could only avert her eyes to her feet.
She found she couldn´t even look at her.
Serah was right of course.
She hadn´t told him.
Couldn´t tell him.
Ever.
She couldn´t...
How was she supposed to pull it off now that he´d started something with Fang?!
Impossible...
There simply was no way.
'Lightning... Talk to him. I´m sure it´s not to late yet. You have to tell him.' Serah insisted.
'No. No he doesn´t want to talk to me anymore.' the older Farron insisted stupidly.
'I don´t believe that Claire. Why do you think so?'
'He´s with Fang now...' the pink haired first class said again.
'Did he tell you that?' Serah asked somewhat sternly.
Looking at her feet, Lightning slowly shook her head.
'I saw them.' she finally said.
'You saw what?'
'The both of them together.'
'Doing what?'
'...'
Thinking about it Claire Farron realized she hadn´t seen them do anything indecent really, had she?
'Talking?' she finally managed in a small voice.
Her sister gave an exasperated sigh.
'Lightning... You aren´t making any sense. This is your hormone´s talking.' Serah said decisively.
The pink haired soldier only glowered.
'Come on. This isn´t the big sis I remember. You´ve gotta get yourself together. Wash your face, take a rest, calm down a bit and then go and talk to him.' the younger girl said encouragingly as she brushed the remaining tears from the other woman´s cheeks.
For Etro's sake. She had finally stopped crying.
'Please. Just leave me alone.' the older sister said suddenly dejectedly.
'Lightning...' Serah pleaded.
'Leave me alone!' she yelled as getting up on her feet she pushed past Serah and hurried upstairs to her room.
She had to find a way.
Had to find a way away from this.
From him.
From Fang.
Her sister.
Everything.
A way out.
Maybe she should leave?
She could be Etro knew where in a few days time.
Noone was going to find her.
Noone was going to miss her even.
She could change her name again, could get her baby in secret and raise it as a single mum.
She could have a normal job. Like a normal person. Just a normal mum. A normal single mum.
Yes, maybe she could.
Maybe she would.
There was nothing else to do. Or was there? Nothing she wanted to consider at the least.
There was no way she could reveal the truth to Sephiroth. Not now that he was with Fang. And there was no way she could get the baby here without anybody knowing either.
No way she would survive the shame, the humiliation, the emberassment, of having to rais a child all by herself under her former mentor's eyes, under all her friend's eyes really.
No. This really was the only way.
It was slamming the door of her bedroom shut behind her that she pulled out her big soldier supply bag, began stuffing it with clothes, with money, and other necessities.
Yes. She would leave.
She definitely would.
What else was there to do.
The truth was she couldn't bear any more of this.
The secrecy. The hiding. The pain. Pretending everything was alright all the time. Watching the father of her unborn child bantering with other woman.
Fuck, even Serah had now turned against her.
There really was nothing that held her in Bodhum. Nothing that still made her call it home.
No.
She was definitely better off leaving. Was better off starting anew somewhere else. She and her child.
Surely they would be much happier far away from all this turmoil, all this hardship, all this guilt.
Setting her almost bursting bag down at her feet, Lightning took a deep long breath.
Yes. It was true.
Bodhum had become her nightmare. And she wanted nothing more than to leave, to escape.
But it was also late. It was late and she was a tired pregnant woman. A tired pregnant woman who needed rest.
Letting her body fall back onto her matrass she lay there on her back staring up at the ceiling.
Yes. It was late and she needed rest.
There was no use departing now, no gain in bolting in the middle of the night. It wouldn't bring her any further.
No. She definitely needed to rest up first.
Yes. She would catch up on her sleep first. Restore some of her energy, some strenght, make sure she really had everything that she needded then refreshed and fitter, she would leave first thing in the morning.
Yes. This seemed like a good idea. Sounded like a solid plan.
It made Claire Farron's eyes close, made her fall into a calm deep slumber. The first one she'd had in many weeks.
Finally she had a goal again. A perspective. Something to work towards.
Finally she was on a mission again.