Chapter 55- Shore Seawind

"I don't know."

Aggie laughs her harsh crow laugh, and presses her fingers harder against her arm, letting her blood spill around her hand. "You, you don't know?"

"I thought you were the leader," Dominicus says, looking at me through narrowed eyes. "That's what you've been calling yourself this whole time, isn't it?"

"Yeah. I'm the leader, but I don't have all the answers," I say. "I thought that's what Aggie was for."

Dominicus barks out a laugh. "Aggie, having all the answers. Sure."

"Shut it, Dommie," Aggie snaps, then narrows her eyes on me. "Up to you right now, Ocean Boy. What are we doing?"

"We're final six now, aren't we?"

"So what? We were final seven five minutes ago, and we weren't having this talk then," Dominicus says.

"We should keep together until the other three are dead," I say. Even though this alliance is broken, I have to try and keep it together, at least until I can get my trident again. If I hadn't left it with Trestle, I would be a lot better off, but for now I have to keep my allies where they are.

"Then what?" Aggie asks. "I know what you're thinking; it's obvious, Shore."

She never calls me Shore. "What am I thinking then?"

"You're going to kill us, that's what you think you're going to do."

"It's the Hunger Games, Aggie."

"True," she says, tilting her head.

"Let's get started," Dominicus says, rubbing the heel of his hand against the hilt of his knife.

"What, on me killing you?" I ask. His voice has annoyed me to the point where I won't mind eliminating him. First him, then Aggie who's already hurt, and then I can take out the last three tributes without any problems.

"No, I don't think so."

"Then what?"

"How about we kill you instead?" Dominicus says, and grips his knife. Over by the trees, Aggie doesn't move, but I've lived with her for the past six days; I know she's getting ready to run. I'll have one chance to get the trident, and that means I have to be faster than Aggie.

"Not ideal," I say, my fingers flexing, anticipating the feel of the trident in my hands. "So, no."

Dominicus flips his knife around like he's getting ready to throw it. "Well, I think I will anyway."

I take off at the same time Aggie finally moves, both of us going for the jungle and where Trestle is. He has what we want; for me, my trident, for her, a knife. Avoiding looking at his mutilated face, I reach and pull my trident from his stomach, leaving three gaping holes in his uniform. When I turn, Aggie's already standing there, holding a bloody knife with both hands, while the wound in her arm continues to soak through her sleeve.

"You're fast," she says. "I'll give you that."

"You haven't seen me really run before."

"Like you'd run," Aggie scoffs. "The great Shore, who's so desperate to be a leader and prove himself or whatever, running away?"

She's right. I wouldn't run; not once in this arena have I run away. And I won't run now, to let my allies, or former allies, battle it out between them. I'll finish what I started, because that's what they're all expecting me to do. I'm the water, I've flowed my way to this hillside, and now I'm going to be the tsunami that will take out my alliance too.

"I won't run away, you know that."

"Do I really, Shore?" Aggie's hands shake slightly, but she looks impassive. Almost bored. "Do I really know that?"

"What do you know then?" If I can keep her distracted, then I can kill her when she's not expecting it. Aggie's smart; I just have to be smarter.

"I know the alliance is over."

I duck just as Aggie throws the knife, I can hear the whistle of the blade as it flies over my head and sticks in a tree behind me. "I thought you were better at aiming than that," I say, slowly standing back up.

Aggie shrugs and presses her hand back onto her bloodstained sleeve. "I made you look over here, didn't I?"

Automatically, I twist, drop, and throw the trident all in one movement, while Dominicus's knife hits a tree a few feet away from me and falls to the ground. Throwing the trident feels like it always has; like pure power is rushing through my veins, like I have the ocean flowing through me and surging forward. I am the ocean, I am the water, I will be District 4's victor.

Dominicus shouts and jumps out of the way, but not fast enough to escape being grazed on the arm by one of the prongs, before the trident hits a smooth tree and sticks. Stumbling to the side with his hand pressed to his arm, he leaves the trees, running back to the hillside with a gasping laugh. Aggie's silent, but I know what's going on; they're still allied with each other; they just want to eliminate me.

So I'll eliminate them first. I'm the shark, and even sharks rip apart their own kind sometimes. District 4 chose me to come here and kill Aggie and Dominicus, and that's what I'm going to do. I have to keep the promises I made; I told Mags that Kelpie would die easy, and she did; I told Mags that I wouldn't trust my allies, and I haven't; I told my family that I would win. I promised Thalassa I would win. I've lost her voice and her laughter; I can't lose the rest of her, and I won't let her lose me.

Dominicus is still gasping and laughing out on the hillside when I run forward and pull my trident back out of the tree, then step out into the bright sunlight. He's not moving, just pressing his hand against his arm and laughing.

"Guess you can aim alright, can't you?" he says, choking on near hysterical laughter.

"I aim better when you're not moving," I say. I have to forget that he was my ally, that he's a boy a year older than me. He's not a boy, he's a fish I have to catch for the Capitol. That's all they are, because if I think about them as my allies, as people, I'll never be able to kill them. The others weren't real either; not the boys from 5 and 12, not Reaper or Kiril or Trestle. Only victors are real, and I have to be that victor.

"Good luck with that," Dominicus snaps, his laughter stopping abruptly.

He's unarmed, and standing there injured. I could kill him, I should kill him, but something is stopping me. The others I've killed; those were different deaths. The two boys first, those were at the Cornucopia bloodbath and almost didn't count. Reaper and Trestle were attacking us. This, this killing Dominicus, it's in cold blood, and somehow I can't do it.

"You waiting for something, Ocean Boy?"

My head whips to the side at the sound of Aggie's voice; she's coming out of the trees with her hand firmly pressed to her arm still. I don't see the knife she's holding until it's almost too late, but I manage to sidestep it at the last moment, letting it tear a hole in my loose pant leg instead of my leg itself.

"So you can aim," I say nonchalantly, tossing my trident from my left hand to my right. "Congratulations."

The wind's picked up; tossing my hair to the side and blowing Aggie's around her face. It's like any sea breeze I've ever felt out on the Jewel, on the water, on the beaches of District 4. And it reminds me of how the wind would pick up Thalassa's red hair and blow it out behind her, until she looked like a sea goddess from the old times.

Dominicus and Aggie are the two people standing in my way of getting back to her. So even though I don't want to kill them now in cold blood, I have to. District 4 chose me to be here; they knew that when the time came, I could kill my allies and take the crown. I'm the volunteer and the tribute. I have to be the victor too.

"Back to where we started," Aggie calls, pushing her blowing hair out of her face and leaving streaks of blood on her cheek in the process. "Only Dommie has a few more holes in him."

"No worse than some of the stuff Aulus used to do," Dominicus replies cheerfully.

Aggie looks at me and her face goes blank. "So again, Shore. What now?"

I tighten my grip on my trident. I'll kill Dominicus first; he's closer, and if he's dead, then it'll make killing Aggie easier. They have to die, they have to die, if I'm going to go back to District 4. I have to go back; I can't back down now. And Mags told me that I will be her champion; how would she feel if I died now?

I keep Dominicus in my peripherals while I watch Aggie, who's still watching me with unrelentless eyes. "What now, Shore?" she asks, and she almost sounds gentle when she says it. Almost.

Quickly, I switch my focus from Aggie to Dominicus, thrusting my trident forward and towards him, but he sidesteps quicker than I can move, dancing just out of reach. Dominicus snickers, stepping back to regroup with Aggie, until we're on two sides; me on one, them on the other.

"Is that that really the best you can do?" he asks, still annoyingly nasally. "Thought you were better than that."

"Shut up, Dommie," Aggie says, keeping her focus on me.

"I'll kill you too, you know," Dominicus says, sounding annoyed.

"Just quit."

"How about we do something before the water rises any higher?" I say, gesturing with my free hand out at the ocean. I can hear the waves breaking against the rocks down below, and it's so familiar.

"You're right, you should hurry up and fire your cannon," Aggie says, still pressing her hand to her shoulder. Trestle's been dead for a long time now, but the hovercraft hasn't come for him yet. Not with us all standing around him like we are. He was alive and now he's not, and the same is going to go for one of the three of us.

"I'm good," I say, and rush forward again, this time against both Aggie and Dominicus. My trident's just left my hand, flying towards Dominicus, when my former ally drops and rolls to the side, letting my trident disappear into the trees behind him.

Dominicus laughs, gasping and wheezing again, while the dawning realization that I'm unarmed sinks in. If he hadn't been so quick, he'd be dead, but he's not; he's standing six feet away from me and laughing while I'm here without a trident in my hand.

"Leave it, Shore," Aggie says. "You're not going to win anyway."

"I am. I have to," I say. I made too many promises; I have to win. I won't let Thalassa down. I said I would marry her, and that's what I intend to do. I have a life outside this arena, just waiting for me, and I'm not going to let Agrippina Crass and Dominicus Sorce throw that away.

"No. You won't." Aggie looks at me, and for a moment I see who she really is again; not a sadistic murderer, not a shark determined to kill. A girl. Trained, but gentle; she could be any girl that's been in this arena. For a moment, she could be Kelpie, scared and lost. Then her look changes to pity, just briefly, before hardening and becoming what she's been this whole time in the arena. Ruthless.

She pulls the knife out of nowhere, the blade shining silver in the sunlight, and the world seems to stop for a moment.

Before the Games started, back on the roof, Mags told me that I would face my mortality; that I would confront the possibility of my own death. And that I should choose to live instead.

I didn't understand her then, but I think I do now. With Aggie pulling out the knife, and me having no trident in my hands, I'm facing my death, facing my allies: a boy I hate and a girl that I will never understand.

She was right about it all; she knew what would happen. So I won't die. I told Mags that I would live and come back, and I owe her that much to keep my promise.

"Stop. Aggie, stop," I say, slowly backing away from them while the wind keeps picking up, shaking the trees and blowing my jacket out behind me. "Stop." My boot catches on a rock, tripping me, and I fall backwards and hard onto the rough stony ground on the edge of the cliff. I can feel the rocks on the edge crumbling under my hands, until it falls away, down to the water below.

"Just stop, Aggie," I tell her, slowly getting back to my feet. "Don't." The waves are loud behind me, and the wind is loud in front of me, but in between, my former allies are silent.

Thalassa. This is all for Thalassa. I have to win for her; I don't matter, nothing matters but getting home to her, because she can't see me die. Not like this. "Aggie."

I look into Aggie's eyes, dark blue, and I see pity in them. No harshness. This whole time, these whole Games, it's been between Agrippina Crass and me. I knew she was trouble and deceiving back in the Capitol, and that's all she's been this whole time in the arena. I saw what she showed the world, and who she really is; I've seen all the shades of Aggie Crass, and I should never have trusted her for a moment. I thought I didn't, but I did. I trusted her enough to keep her alive.

"I'm sorry, Shore," she says, the true Agrippina Crass says, and with a single movement of her hand, the knife leaves it and hurtles towards me. When Aggie wants to, she never misses. I know that. I saw her in Training, at the Cornucopia, and on the beaches here too.

Still, it's still a shock to see her knife embedded in my chest.

The world slows down and speeds up in the same ways that it did when I killed Reaper, when Aggie killed the mutt. Words catch in my throat; I can taste blood, but I manage to get one word out before I choke.

"Aggie."

"Goodbye." Her eyes are gentle, and I know that it's the real Agrippina Crass who's put a knife in my chest. That no matter who she is or pretends to be, she's a killer. And maybe a victor too, because it's not going to be me.

I cough, and the blood bubbles in my mouth, making me stagger backwards. One moment, the ground is there, and the next, I'm falling, still with Aggie Crass's knife in my chest.

Thalassa.

I loved her. I loved her more than myself, more than anyone in the world. And even though I loved her, I'm leaving her. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry that I was a fool to believe that I could win, that I could kill my allies in the end.

I'll never marry her. I'll never have a future with her, and my family is going to lose me too. Da, Ma- what's going to happen to them? My sisters?

I'll never see the sun rise from the Jewel again either. I've lost everything.

District 4 put their trust in me, and I failed them. I've failed everyone.

I should have given Thalassa a star when I had the chance. I should have given her the whole world, and told her I loved her sooner, because all the time we had is all the time there's ever going to be.

I'm sorry.

The ocean gives and gives and gives until it can't give anymore, and then it takes back. That's all it's done for six days is take. It's my turn now. Maybe somewhere, Da will pull in a net of fish and think of me, because I've given myself back to the ocean.

But it doesn't matter now. All that matters is the fall, and then the feel of the waves and rocks as I hit them and disappear.