(A/N: Here we are, the penultimate chapter. Thanks to everyone still reading and doing that crap I nag you to do. Self-indulgent as these chapters are, y'all are a big part of why I've worked so hard on these over the years.)

Ch. 59: The Irascible Shrunken Zim

Summary: Zim accidentally shrinks himself and needs Tak's help returning to normal size.

KABOOOOOM!

"There's my cue..."
Tak made a beeline for the lab chamber where she heard that explosion go off. Waving the smoke away, she peered around.
"Ughh, I knew it. ZIM! That is the last time I let you operate foreign machinery on your own! ...Zim? Zim, where are you?"

"Ahem."

"Huh?" Tak looked down and saw Zim...much further down than usual. He'd been shrunken. He barely came up to her waist. Her eyes widened in shock. "Zim, y...you're tiny."

"I noticed," he grumbled.

"What h-happened?" She struggled to process what she was seeing. "How'd you get so...?"

Zim cleared his throat again, then gestured toward the partially-exploded machine. It bore a striking resemblance to a walk-in shower, and had "Breadth-Box" printed along the base.

"I was trying to use this device. It contains special photons which alter the size of anything inside," he explained. "And its production was discontinued, so I had to order most of the parts separately."

"Sounds expensive."

"Well, I've got a guy. Anyway, I was using it, and there was some kind of malfunction, so," Zim's tiny arms flopped to his sides. "I ended up like this."

"Then, you wanted to make yourself bigger?" asked Tak. "Why?"

"Why not?" Zim scrunched up his face. "Everyone wants to be taller, at least a little...well, maybe YOU don't. But I'm sure you don't see a lot of the world's hardships from where you're standing!"

"Re-Really? So that's why..." Snickering, Tak covered her mouth. "What a disaster...!"

"Glad you find my predicament SO amusing, Tak!" scoffed Zim, holding his tiny hips. "Can't say I'm surprised, though!"

"Sorry, but that's irony for ya!" Tak gleefully mirrored his stance. "Heheheh! This is why you don't mess with the laws of nature like this; they always find a way to get back at you! Just like those humans who get plastic surgery only to end up looking like they lit their face on fire and tried to douse it with a hammer."

"YEAH. YEAH, LIKE THAT."

"Hahhh, sorry. Anyway," Tak bent down to his level. "You can reverse it, right?"

"Right! In theory! If I repair the machine!" Zim scurried back towards it and hit a button to reactivate it. No dice. He went to inspect the damaged part of it, but it was too high up. "Eh! Eh! Ehn...!"

Tak sat idly by and watched. "Pfft. Why don't you try your PAK legs or something?"

"I thought of that, and I can't!" Zim kept jumping, trying to reach the top of the machine, until he fell on his tiny behind. "Oof! There's a warning on the side, it says not to use any cybernetics for an hour after absorbing photons or my teeth will melt!"

"Aw, geez, Zim. What're you gonna do?" Tak mused flippantly.

"Y'know, YOU could do something!"

"I could, yes. What'd you have in mind?"

"Gee, I dunno!" Zim's voice dripped with sarcasm. "Perhaps if there were someone taller around, who isn't under threat of dental liquefication, they could help repair the machine!"

"Alright, alright." Tak whistled, then called out. "GIR, MIMI, C'MERE!"

"THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!" blustered Zim. "I don't want them to see me!"

In the few seconds it took for the SIRs to arrive on the scene, he'd ran and hidden behind the Breadth-Box.

"SUP!" greeted GIR, only to be shushed by Tak.

She pointed at the Breadth-Box and signaled him and MiMi to tiptoe around it. Just as the duo snuck around the left of it, Zim came sidling out from behind it.
Tak motioned for him to keep going and, thinking it was a trick, Zim crept the opposite way. He peered around the corner of the machine only to find himself face-to-face with GIR and MiMi.

"AAAAAAGHHH!"

"Master, look at you!" GIR beamed, and poked him in the gut. "You're almost as big as me nowww!"

"SMACK!" Zim slapped him off. "NONE OF THAT! Zim is still your mas—AHH!"

GIR hoisted the Irken over his head. "Go long, MiMi!"

"Play nice with him!" Tak warned as Zim was flung across the room. "He's smaller and more fragile than usual!"

Obeying her mistress, MiMi caught him carefully (not that it made Zim any less livid). She paused, then dug into her head compartment for something.

"What are you doing?" Zim grimaced once she found that something; a hotdog costume complete with bun and mustard. "What is that, why do you have that?!"

"MiMi, you're so bad!" GIR giggled, racing over. "Yeah, let's dress 'im like a wiener!"

"NO, NO, NO! HEED ME!" protested Zim, thrashing about as they pulled the suit over him. "AAUGHH, THE CHAFFING!"

"Lemme see, lemme see!" Tak clapped when they showed Zim off. The suit didn't even have openings for his limbs, only his face. His tiny, wrathful face. "OH, you look horrible! Hahaha, you oughta put 'Sausage Zim' plushies up for sale, they'd do great!"

"I'd buy one!" agreed GIR.

"ENOUGH FOOLISHNESS!" Zim tore the costume off, even biting it to shred it further. "Ptoo! If none of you feel like being useful, I've got a transmission to send! I'll find out how to fix this stupid device! THIS, I SWEAR!"

"Oooh, sounds important," Tak's eyes tracked his storming past her. "Well, don't let us stop you."

"Awww," GIR pouted. "I was gonna dress 'im like a sailor next."

XXXXXXXAWHILELATERXXXXXXX

After he'd been gone a while, Tak decided to check on Zim; a little guy like him could get lost down in that lab.
She followed his voice down a cavern to the usual part of the lab used for calls, and found him on a stepping stool. It was barely concealed by the dashboard between the floor and the screen, where a Vortian was nodding along to Zim's rantings.

"Whatcha doin', Zim?" she asked, stepping into the light.

"AGHH," he nearly fell off his stool. "Tak! Just because there's no door doesn't mean you shouldn't knock!"

"This is your 'important transmission'? Who's that rando?"

"Oh! Tak, this is Prisoner 777," Zim said in a casual manner. "I occasionally call on him for, ehhh, technical support. Which he better provide if he wants to keep his babies existent."

"Hiya," 777 waved.

"You've got a Vortian inmate assisting you?" Tak crossed her arms. "Isn't that...not right?"

"Hmm?"

"I feel like you're not allowed to do that."

Zim shrugged. "Well, anyhow."

"Mmn."

"It was he who sent me the parts for the machine, so if anyone can tell me how to fix it, it's him!"

"I would, if you'd divulge what the problem is already," the Vortian insisted.

"If I knew that, I wouldn't be contacting you! Now make with the cooperation! Do you WANT your offspring destroyed?!"

"I guess not," groaned 777. "Look, I double-checked, you were sent all the correct parts for the Breadth-Box. It must've been assembled wrong."

"Oh, you IDIOT!" shouted Tak.

"AY!" Zim said, offended.

"Not you, him!" she pointed at the screen.

"Oh."

"What were you thinking, trusting an idiot like Zim to put that thing together? Y'know, he once broke his hand inserting a flash drive!"

"AY!"

"Hey, I've made tons of deliveries just like this," 777 replied. "I never know exactly how he's gonna screw up."

"Excuses, excuses," Tak strolled up beside the irritated Zim.

"Wait a second." After a couple blinks, 777 peeped through his fingers like goggles. "Why d'you look so big standing next to him?"

"Ah..." Sweat ran down Zim's face. "Perspective."

The Vortian's jaw dropped. "YOU'RE SHRUNK!"

"Listen, I—"

"AhHhH, YOU SHRUNK YOURSELF! How the heck did you manage that?! That machine only has, like, two settings!"

"777! That is completely IRRELEVANT!" sputtered Zim. "The current issue is getting me back to normal size! Now do as I say, I'm losing my patience!"

"No need to get short with him," quipped Tak.

777 heaved a sigh. "At least now I see the problem. It's those special photons stored in the Breadth-Box that alter your size; my educated guess is you didn't wire everything right, like there was a cross somewhere, straining the flow of the photons. Or something. If you rearrange it correctly and everything, you should be able to return to normal. You and your, uhh, uhhh..."

"Let's go with 'partner in crime'," said Tak, causing Zim to do a double take.

"Uh, yeah, you two oughta fix it together, man. It wouldn't be an easy task alone, especially for someone your size. And I doubt your robot slaves would be better suited to the job. "

Tak furrowed her brow. "They prefer the term 'minion', but...yeah, that's a fair assessment."

"Hmph," Zim eyed her cynically for a moment. "Can't you just send me a new machine?"

"I would if I could but I can't so I won't," 777 fiddled with his hands. "Those parts were hard enough to come by as it was. Prison life is no fun."

"Well, bye then." Tak hung up, and promptly tucked Zim under her arm. "Come on, buddy."

"HEY, I'm shrunken, not paraplegic!" he hissed as she carried him off.

"If you had to walk the whole way, it'd take forever to get back to the machine."

"So what? Given those shenanigans earlier, you clearly don't care about resolving this disaster!"

"Of course I do, I've already helped you! During your little 'conjugal visit', I sent GIR and MiMi out to the sauce mine, then I scoped the damage and figured out where the problem was," Tak handed him a blueprint. "Here, I drew this diagram of how the proper set-up should look."

"Ah!" Zim took it, only to frown at how sloppy it was. He could barely tell what he was looking at. "WHAT? You can draw better than this!"

"UH, well, I was drawing it, but then I kept thinking about Sausage You," Tak wore a slight smirk. "I-It's tough to focus with that image on the brain."

"RRRGHHM!" Zim crumpled up the paper and threw it away. "Ughhh, you still don't get it."

Tak glanced at him as she reentered the Breadth-Box's room, then set him down. "Zim, I feel bad for you and all, but surely you can see the humor in this considering you're the one who caused—"

"SEE?! That right there! You don't get what it's like having the wit, the charisma, the...everything else of a Tallest, doomed to the diminutive stature of a service drone! Hoping decade after decade that I'll grow even a little taller! But it never happens!" Zim clenched his tiny fists in frustration. "What, am I supposed to just accept the fact that I can hardly match anyone's tallness, not even my own partner's? I'm thankful you can tolerate it, but some of us are a bit more proactive!"

Taking in his words, Tak pensively rubbed her arm, then knelt down. "It's ok, Zim. It doesn't—"

"If you say 'size doesn't matter', so help me, Tak..."

"No, not that..." She reached out to him and he surprisingly didn't turn away, even if he still looked upset. Tak held him close and cradled him, like a child. "It's, I don't 'tolerate' your size. I actually think it's part of why I like you."

"Why?" Zim pulled his tiny knees up to his face in curiosity. "Because it gives you a sense of superiority over me?"

"NO. It's because you don't let it stifle you. You aren't inhibited by any of your flaws, really, you stay the same self-confident Zim. That's called 'strength of character', and it matters much more to me than how tall you are."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Plus it's cute, y'know," Tak had to add.

Zim would've complained about that, but he just lumped in with the rest of Tak's comforting speech, and told himself she had the right idea.

"You have the right idea!" Reinvigorated, he hopped out of her arms, towards the Breadth-Box. "Computer! Put on some jaunty music! We're finally fixing this thing!"

And so, Zim and Tak partook in a
*~TEAMWORK MONTAGE~*
in which they worked together to repair the Breadth-Box, rewire everything as needed, establish a newfound respect for each other, all topped off with a high-five at the end.

Once Zim stepped back into the box, Tak crossed her fingers and powered it on. Quite a few bright sparks came from inside as all those shrinking photons were removed from Zim, and then the machine shut down (without exploding this time).

Zim emerged from it with his height fully restored, and patting himself all over. "So! I'm exactly the same as before?"

"That's right."

"Not even a little bit taller?"

"'Fraid not. You're really ok with it?"

"Sure! I AM ZIM, after all! And this is the size Zim should be," he declared. "Perfectly Zim-sized as the universe intended."

"Well said, Zim, very mature," Tak nodded proudly. "Hmm, speaking of which, I think it'd only be responsible to destroy this machine."

"A-ha-ha, probably," Zim looked upon it with anticipation. "How shall we do it? Large, extra-large, or triple-extra large explosion?"

"I've got a couple chainsaws in the other room. We could light 'em on fire and slash it to pieces," suggested Tak. "Unless you think that's overkill."

"..."

"..."

"COMPUTER, PUT ON SOME DEATH METAL!"

(A/N: As a "fully grown" woman at 5'3", this chapter contained some venting. I just want a couple more inches and the universe refuses to begrudge me them. It's some bull.
Anyhow, hope you enjoyed. Please review, fave, follow, check for errors and I'll see you next time for the "grand" finale. I'll try to make it a real labor of love, so...I guess if you have any ideas—VERY small ideas bc I DO have a core concept planned—for stuff that could happen or even just jokes, uh, lemme know! Maybe I'll work it in somehow. PEACE!)