NOTE: I plan to write some extra chapters dedicated to Levy's notes at the end of this fic, just so y'all know exactly what it is that she's been writing about every character by the end.
Also, I do realize that not everyone gets to speak much since it's a large cast. Not much I can do about it now and I'll do my best to give more characters more chances to speak. I'll tell you now though that when I do write "Fairy Tail Plays DBZ: Kakarot" that it will only be the Fairy Tail cast playing the game. Said cast won't be the whole guild, but a smaller number to fit the number of playable characters.
And for what happened at the end of last chapter, just imagine Dragons flying in the air and suddenly God himself strikes down each and everyone of them. That's essentially what the Dragon Slayers felt, and I'll go deeper into that once they start reacting to Cell again.
Other than that, please enjoy and review!
Chapter 59: Return of Cooler
Each one of the Dragon Slayers were breathing heavily. Makarov made his way over to Mira with a concerned expression on his face.
"Mira! Do you know what happened?" Makarov asked.
"Not at all, Master. The note that came with the Lacrama never said anything like this would happen," Mira explained. She peered over to Laxus where he was being tended to by the Thunder Legion.
"Laxus! Are you ok?"
"Do you need to rest!?"
"Do you need us to get anything!?"
"What I need is for you three to give me space," Laxus grumbled. The Lightning Slayer managed to get to his feet and sit back down into his chair. His hands rubbed his forehead in irritation. "What the hell was that creature? The only time I've felt this was when we first fought Acnologia. What the hell is that Lacrama…"
Levy and Lily were fretting over Gajeel. Lily had transformed into his buff form to help his partner off the ground. "Gajeel are you ok?" Lily asked.
"I'm fine, Lily, no need to stress," Gajeel smirked. His eyes softened as he looked at Levy's concerned gaze. "I'm fine, Levy. I just wasn't expecting something like that to happen," Gajeel embraced her in a hug, and she hurriedly returned.
"Just don't scare me like that again, you looked as if death was coming to take your soul," Levy said, into his chest. Gajeel frowned and glanced back at the Lacrama. Wondering what the hell actually happened.
Minerva, Yukino, and the Exceeds were at Sting and Rogue's sides immediately. Frosch was crying as he practically glued himself to Rogue's face. The Shadow Dragon Slayer gripped his partner's body and pulled him off. "Frosch!"
The Exceed continued to cry and looked at Rogue. "Rogue was in pain..a-and Frosch couldn't help!"
"I'm not hurt anymore, Frosch. I promise you that I'll be fine for now on," Rogue spoke softly and held his partner in his arms.
"R-Really?"
"Yeah."
Yukino and Lector rounded on Sting. Both of them embraced Sting for dear life, afraid he'd go into another panic attack.
"Y-Your going to be alright? Right, Sting?" Lector tried to hold back his tears. Sting smiled softly at his partner.
"I'm going to be just fine, Lector. Nothing can keep me down! You know that!" Sting's smile grew wide, which helped ease Lector's worries. He then turned to Yukino who was awaiting him. She placed her hands on his face to check him over.
"I'm going to be just fine, Yukino," Sting softly held her hands.
"I know, but it doesn't stop me from worrying," Yukino replied.
"As if you two would be hurt by some bug's presence," Minerva scoffed. Even though she put up a tough act, the other Sabertooth mages knew she was glad to see the Dragon Slayers were fine.
"I'm going to be just fine, Carla. I don't feel sick to my stomach anymore," Wendy hugged Carla closely.
"I want to make sure of that with my own eyes. You looked as if you wanted to throw up," Carla replied, rubbing her paws on Wendy's arms.
COUGH COUGH
Everyone in the guild turned towards Mira. The eldest Strauss cleared her throat. "Does everyone think they can continue watching?" She received nods and reluctant nods from the audience. Giving them her own nod and smile in return, she turned back to the Lacrama. As she began to reactivate it, everyone thought the same thing together.
"We need to hurry and find out what that bug thing is."
(cut to a spaceship flying in space with GOKU, GOHAN, KRILLIN, MASTER ROSHI, and OOLONG inside. YAJIROBE is munching down on a rice ball)
"HUH!?" The guild all comically fell to the ground at the sudden difference in scene.
"Wait! Wait! Wait! Why is Goku not in bed and why are they in space!?" Lucy voiced everyone's thoughts.
"Might be another movie, since there's such a sudden shift in scenery," Levy guessed.
"But why!? When we got left on such a big cliffhanger with so many questions!?" Lucy continued to scream, comically.
"I don't know! But, I'm grateful to not have to see that bug thing at the moment," Levy replied and leaned back into Gajeel.
Some agreed that they didn't want to see that bug anytime soon while some others wanted answers immediately.
GOHAN: So Dad, what's the first thing you wanna do when we get to Namek? Maybe go fishing? Camping? Anything that doesn't involve training?
"You're talking to the wrong person," Macao replied to the boy.
GOKU: I'm gonna be first in line to try some old-fashioned Namekian cooking!
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure they don't eat, Goku. So, that's going to be pretty difficult for you," Wendy giggled.
GOHAN: I don't see that happening.
GOKU: Not with that attitude!
"I've missed the sound of his voice," Erza sighed, happily. Jellal and Kagura both flinched at her words.
"I'm just happy to not hear him screaming anymore," Makarov messaged his poor ears at the memory.
KRILLIN: I'm looking forward to a relaxing vacation! This will be the first time that I've been on Namek where I haven't been beaten up...or stabbed...or exploded.
"That brings up a good question. Why are they going to Namek?" Lily asked.
"Oh! Maybe to visit Dende?" Wendy hoped.
"That shouldn't require an entire movie though," Carla said.
MASTER ROSHI: I'm looking to get with some sexy Namekian ladies!
"Who's gonna tell him?" Romeo asked, pointing at the old pervert.
KRILLIN: I... don't see that happening.
MASTER ROSHI: Not with that attitude!
"No, it's just impossible," Evergreen sighed, annoyed.
YAJIROBE: I'm just looking forward to getting some time away from Korin.
KRILLIN: Are you two fighting? Because I notice a distinct lack of cat hair on you.
YAJIROBE: Yum! (continues shoveling down on his food)
"They're fighting," Lisanna and Juvia said, simultaneously.
GOKU: Hey, Piccolo! What's your favorite Namekian dish?
(cut to Piccolo in the other room isolated from the others)
GOHAN: Dad, I hate to break it to you, but Namekians don't eat.
GOKU: That's weird. They're weird.
"I know right! How could somebody not like eating?" Natsu was still flabbergasted by Namekians.
NAIL: (telepathically) So, haven't been home in a while, eh Kami?
KAMI: (telepathically) About 500 years, give or take.
PICCOLO: Eh, you're not missing much.
"Yeah, it's just trees and water. With less Frieza," Lisanna agreed.
KAMI: (telepathically) Oh, please. Unlike you, I remember the halcyon days of our planet. Beautiful blue landscapes, a thriving culture. Our beautiful kinship with our Albino brothers.
"Hm," Freed raised an eyebrow.
NAIL & PICCOLO: Oooooh...
KAMI: (telepathically) What?
(shows the spaceship approaching New Namek)
OOLONG: Uh, guys? Can a planet get cancer?
"That's an odd question. I would hope not," Yukino said, worried.
KRILLIN: That's a weird question. Why do you- (sees a giant grayish piece of matter on New Namek outside the window) Whoa, wow!
"WOAH!"
"What happened to Namek!?" Sting asked, astonished.
MASTER ROSHI: If it needs some inspectin', I'm your man! I've done my share of mammograms in my day, if you catch my drift!
"Ewwww…"
OOLONG: When I do them, they're called hammograms.
YAJIROBE: That'll do, pig.
"Yeah, no more pig jokes," Romeo crossed his arms.
GOKU: Oh, boy. Someone should probably go tell Piccolo.
PICCOLO: (appears behind Goku) Someone should go tell Piccolo WhaAAAAAH... (sees the grayish piece of matter on New Namek as the ship enters the atmosphere)
("Team Four Star presents" text appears on the screen and then shows "Cooler 2: The Return of Cooler's Revenge – The Reckoning")
"COOLER!?"
"Didn't he literally get tossed into the sun!? How is he alive!?" Sting questioned.
Lucy on the other hand melted in horor. "No more of Frieza's family!"
(Cut to New Namek with a bunch of Namekians handcuffed and walking in a line. Two Cycloids are heard beeping.)
KEEL: (thinking) That's it. Enough of this. (destroys his handcuffs) Time to f*ck some face! (starts charging at a Cycloid)
CYCLOID: Beep. (grabs Keel by the face)
KEEL: Oh no, my face! (the Clycloid tosses him to the ground)
"Welp, you got face fucked," Laxus commented.
MOURI: No, please! He's but a boy! He knows not what he does!
"Reminds me of someone," Macao eyed his son. Romeo whistled nervously and looked away from his father.
CYCLOID: Beep. (prepares to attack Keel)
MOURI: You're so cruel...
CYCLOID: Beep.
(The Cycloid fires a blast, but Gohan appears and deflects it to the ground. Goku and Krillin appear when the smoke clears.)
"Z-Fighters to the rescue!" Happy and Lector cheer.
GOKU: I don't want to have to solve this with violence, but I also really wanna punch you. (more CYCLOIDS appear) And your friends.
"Then that means violence is the only answer!" Natsu pumped his flamed fist.
CYCLOID: Beep.
KRILLIN: (off-screen) That one's askin' for it!
"What did it say?" Meredy asked.
GOKU: What are you even doing on New Namek?
CYCLOID: Beep.
GOKU: A what? Well, I think we have one on the ship, but the sodas aren't cold yet.
META COOLER: (off-screen) I believe they're referring to me. (appears in front of the CYCLOIDS, who all proceed to start beeping in applause)
"Woah! Cooler's got an upgrade!" Bickslow exclaimed.
"Yeah! He's now Cooler than Cooler!" Sting said, much to the embarrassment of his guildmates.
"What is he? A Metal Cooler?" Gray asked.
"No, that was Frieza," Freed responded.
META COOLER: Thank you, thank you. You're too kind. (one Cycloid beeps again) And you're just brown-nosing.
Laxus gave Freed a quick glance.
GOKU: So, you return once again, Freezer.
"How could you even…" Lucy deadpanned.
GOHAN: (off-screen) Cooler.
GOKU: Cooler.
META COOLER: Yes. I have returned, dumbass.
GOKU: Goku.
"No no, he was correct," Minerva spoke. She ignored the glare she received from Erza.
META COOLER: Dumbass. With the help of the Big Gete Star. (Krillin laughs off-screen)
"Yes, Krillin, we get the joke," Lily shook his head.
META COOLER: Thanks to it, I have been reborn with this new dynamic, metal form. With it, we have entrapped this planet. And now... we are going to f*ck it. Both figuratively...
(cut to scenario of Big Gete Star drilling into New Namek; cut back to present)
META COOLER: (slowly) And... very literally.
There was a brief moment of silence from the audience in response to Cooler's actions.
"There's a thing called "consent". Give it a try sometime," Gajeel said.
"I still want to know why he chose Namek of all places," Levy desired to know.
KRILLIN: ...You know, just because it can't reject you, doesn't imply consent.
META COOLER: Now, what say you?
PICCOLO: Freeza did it.
"And there's his reason," Levy added to Cooler's character page.
META COOLER: Excuse you?
KRILLIN: The robot thing. Freeza did it. When he came back to Earth.
META COOLER: But that's not the same, I-
"Different circumstances, but overall still copying your baby brother," Bickslow mocked.
PICCOLO: After he took over Namek, like you are now.
META COOLER: Wait... He destroyed Namek!
"He still took it over before throwing a hissy fit and destroying it," Gildarts countered.
GOHAN: Well, this is New Namek.
META COOLER: So it's completely different!
"Aren't you literally draining the life from Namek. Which would be the same as destroying it, just like Frieza?" Erza raised an eyebrow at Cooler's ignorance.
PICCOLO: Yeah, about as different as you are from Freeza.
KRILLIN/Romeo: (off-screen) Shots fired!
META COOLER: Kill the bald one.
"Which one? You are talking about Piccolo, right?" Mira asked.
(the Cycloids starts charging at the Z-Fighters)
CYCLOID: Beep.
KRILLIN: Freeza did it.
"He's not wrong," Lucy remembered Krillin's death.
(One Cycloid punches Krillin into a plateau. Another Cycloid tries attacking Gohan, but Gohan evades the attack.)
CYCLOID: Beep.
GOHAN: Eep!
PICCOLO: (fighting three Cycloids at once) Stop being a bunch of pansies!
"Piccolo handling three like a real man!" Elfman yelled.
(cut over to Yajirobe, Oolong, and Master Roshi)
OOLONG: I'm gonna die on an alien planet! Dammit, I'm becoming Krillin!
"Why are you guys even here?" Rogue asked.
"Comedic relief, most likely," Levy answered him.
YAJIROBE: Calm your tits, scrabo-breath. Master Roshi's got this one.
MASTER ROSHI: (standing in front of an army of Cycloids) I have many things... A best friend who's a turtle, an island... Chlamydia…
The adults in the guild all did a double take at that one.
MASTER ROSHI: This... is not one of 'em.
YAJIROBE: Oh... Well then what are we-
(shows the Cycloids dragging off Master Roshi, Yajirobe, and Oolong after capturing them)
OOLONG: Hey, Master Roshi! What if you try giving 'em the clap, you jackass?!
"Can robots even get that?" Gildarts wondered, until Cana slapped him for thinking about it.
(cut to Goku attempting to attack Meta Cooler with Kaio-ken, but it has no effect and Meta Cooler retaliates by kneeing Goku in the face and punches him)
"Aw! No "Kaio-What" joke?" Levy whined.
GOKU: So, I keep punching you, but you ain't budgin'.
"The story of all of Natsu's fights," Gray remarked.
"Hey! Not all my fights are like that!"
"Name one."
"Every time I fight you," Natsu smirked at Gray's shocked expression.
META COOLER: That would be my new metal body.
GOKU: Which you got from the Spaghetti Star, right?
"Natsu don't call it that," Erza stopped the pink haired mage before he even opened his mouth.
META COOLER: ...Not dignifying that. Look, why don't you just turn Super Saiyan? Then we can get serious.
GOKU: But I don't wanna end the fight yet-we just started. I mean, why don't you use that little mask thing?
"Yeah, that form was awesome. Scary, but awesome!" Lisanna agreed.
"We're not acknowledging the fact that he's that confident? No? Ok," Gajeel noticed everyone was paying more attention to the movie than his comment.
META COOLER: Good question, but I've got a better one, though. What's that thing on your face?
GOKU: What's what thing on my-
META COOLER: MAH FIST! (punches Goku in the face)
"Gotta try that one next time," Gajeel turned his hand into iron.
GOKU: All right, fine! I'll go Super Saiyan. But I'm doing this for me. (transforms into a Super Saiyan)
This transformation had to be the prettiest one they've seen yet. Not much to say other than that.
(cut to Piccolo attacking a Cycloid and fails to make even a dent)
"You can hit harder than that, Green man!" Mira shouted.
CYCLOID: Beep.
PICCOLO: F*ck! (thinking while removing his cape and turban) Dammit, I gotta find a way to break these things.
NAIL: (Have you tried hitting them harder?)
"That sounds like something Natsu would say," Fairy Tail all said, collectively.
PICCOLO: That sounds like something Goku would say.
KAMI: (Yes... And remember that time you've never beaten him?)
PICCOLO: RAAAGH! (drives his fist straight through a Cycloid)
"That's one way to motivate him," Mira smiled.
PICCOLO: (thinking) Huh... It worked.
"Told you it works, Lucy."
"Shut up!"
(cut back to Goku vs. Meta Cooler)
GOKU: HIYAH! (hits Meta Cooler really hard and sever his right arm) Hey, it worked! (Meta Cooler regenerates his right arm) Wow, the Big Ghetto Star ain't no one's fool.
"Don't even think about it," Erza once again stopped Natsu.
META COOLER: That's right, monkey. With the power of the Big Gete Star, I can recover from any injury, no matter how intense. But enough about me, let's kill you! (punches Goku in the stomach and begins to choke him)
"GOKU!"
(cut back to the others)
CYCLOID: Beep. (knocks Gohan to the ground and then smacks him away, who then struggles to get up)
"GOHAN!"
KRILLIN: My God! (lands on Gohan and they both get up, back-to-back) Any ideas?
GOHAN: Well, our opponents are mechanical...
CYCLOID: Beep.
GOHAN: ...which means they'll have structural weak points we can exploit. Likely their joint areas. I suggest- (Piccolo lands beside him) Huh?
PICCOLO: I figured it out. We just need to hit them really, really hard.
"Yeah! No nerdy science stuff needed!" Natsu agreed with Piccolo.
GOHAN: ...That sounds like something my dad would say.
PICCOLO: Right! (starts attacking the Cycloid with Gohan following suit)
KRILLIN: I've prepared my whole life for this.. It's KRILLER TI- (Cycloid elbows him in the face) It's never gonna be a thing... (falls to the ground)
"Anyone could've told you that," Gajeel laughed.
PICCOLO: (off-screen) Just use your friggin Kienzan, Christ!
"He really needs to use it more," Freed said.
(Meanwhile, Cooler is still choking Goku)
META COOLER: My God, you take an eternity to choke.
"Considering the fact that he can scream for hours on end, I'm not surprised," Minerva agreed with Cooler.
GOKU: Is that...all you...got?
"You're in no position to antagonize him," Erza facepalmed.
META COOLER: As a matter of fact... (sends a wave of power through his arm and chokes Goku harder)
GOKU: Ah! Regret! Regret!
(Vegeta comes out of nowhere and kicks Cooler in the face, causing him to release Goku)
"VEGETA!?"
"Oh great. The royal ass is back," Minerva grumbled.
GOKU: (kinda raspy) Oh hey, Vegeta. When and how did you get here?
"I would like to know, but I'd doubt he'd answer," Levy said.
VEGETA: Apologies, but if anyone's going to kill Kakarrot... (transforms into a Super Saiyan) ...it's me.
"You're not that good at it," Erza said.
GOKU: You're not even that good at it.
The knight blushed at her and Goku saying the same thing.
VEGETA: Shut your hole, Kakarrot. Anyway, We meet at last... Cooler.
META COOLER: Yes, we do... y-you...?
"You don't know him? Isn't Vegeta the Prince of Saiyans? How do you not know him?" Evergreen asked.
"Cooler wasn't in charge of the Saiyans, Frieza was. So, that probably explains it," Levy answered.
VEGETA: Wait, do you not know who I am?
META COOLER: Should I?
VEGETA: I am Vegeta, Prince of all Saiyans! (continues speaking as Meta Cooler looks around in a bored expression) Last of my royal blood, bringer of death, destroyer of worlds, and wrecker of your shit.
Minerva was laughing at Cooler's disregard of Vegeta's speech.
"God, can he sound more full of himself?" Laxus rolled his eyes.
META COOLER: Saiyan? Forgive me, I was under the impression there was only one of you.
VEGETA: Oh, trust me. There is ONLY one of ME.
META COOLER: Then my eyes must deceive me, because I believe I see TWO dead monkeys.
"Gotta give it to Frieza's family. They have really good comebacks," Gajeel acknowledged.
(Vegeta charges forward, but gets sent flying away by Meta Cooler. After one second, Vegeta once again charges forward, but gets thrown back again. Not one to admit defeat, Vegeta proceeds to charge again, only to get sent flying again. Vegeta comes back and charges again.)
The guildhall was filled with laughter at Vegeta getting sent flying repeatedly.
Laxus pinched the bridge of his nose as he thought back to his fight with Gajeel and Natsu. Only that Natsu was in Vegeta's position.
(Shifting over to Piccolo ripping apart the Cycloids one by one, who all beep as they explode)
GOHAN: Mr. Piccolo! (is being carried off by four Cycloids)
"No, Gohan!" Mira and Lisanna cried out.
"Kid couldn't even last long enough to beat one," Laxus grumbled. He felt a chill up his spine as Mira sent a death glare in his direction.
PICCOLO: I'm coming!
KRILLIN: Phrasing!("Really?" Lucy deadpanned) I mean, help! (is also being carried off by four Cycloids)
"I'm not surprised about Krillin," Gildarts said.
PICCOLO: (a Cycloid grabs him in the arm) Nice try, but you're not just gonna pull me away like- (a Cycloid sticks its gatling gun in his face) Huh? (the Cycloid proceeds to open fire on his face) Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Dicks! Dicks!
"Stop crying!" Mira shouted.
NAIL: (They're just bullets, they're hardly even...) (several Cycloids form arm cannons) (Oh, cool. Cannons! Those'll hurt.)
PICCOLO: (under siege) They dooooo!
"Hang in there, Piccolo!" Wendy said.
(cut back to Vegeta once again getting knocked back by Meta Cooler)
META COOLER: He's quite persistent.
"You couldn't begin to imagine," Fairy Tail sweatdropped.
GOKU: You have no idea. (Vegeta charges forward and gets knocked back) He's actually a really nice guy after you get to know him.
META COOLER/Everyone: I doubt that.
(Vegeta charges forward again)
VEGETA: Son of a bitch, I got you this ti- (attempts to kick Meta Cooler only for him to crush his leg) AAAAAAHHHH! (Meta Cooler mutes him by grabbing his mouth)
META COOLER: You want to know what death tastes like?
"Not exactly," Yukino replied.
(Vegeta's lets out muffled screams as Meta Cooler prepares a blast)
GOKU: Hi-yah! (kicks Meta Cooler off Vegeta)
VEGETA: (growls) Would you just- (Meta Cooler disappears) What!? Where did you-
GOKU: (pins Meta Cooler down behind Vegeta) Don't worry! Saved you again, best buddy!
"Goku always comes to the rescue!" Erza and Natsu cheer together.
VEGETA: That's it! Killing you both! BIG BANG ATTACK!
(Vegeta fires a blast at both Goku and Meta Cooler, but they vanish before the blast can connect. In the smoke, Meta Cooler appears and kicks Vegeta in his 'DragonBalls', which causes him to squeal in pain in slow motion before Meta Cooler punches him in Goku's direction)
Every male in the audience all tense up in phantom pain at what they just witnessed. Feeling extreme sympathy for Vegeta at the moment. As taking a super strength kicked to the nuts from something even stronger than metal had to be extremely painful.
Most of the women winced at the hit, but didn't feel the exact same pain as the men did. Cana and Minerva were laughing at Vegeta's pained face and squeal.
"At least Trunks was already born," Lucy chuckled, nervously.
GOKU: Huh? (catches Vegeta) Aww, he's all tuckered out.
"It's more than that," Gray released a ragged breath.
(cut back to Piccolo as the Cycloids have finished firing cannons at him)
PICCOLO: All right, you get that out of your system?
CYCLOID: Beep.
PICCOLO: Okay, just wanted to make sure.
CYCLOID: Beep.
PICCOLO: Okay, good. (fires a explosive wave that destroys all of the Cycloids, who beep as they go down) (thinking) All right, better go save Gohan.
"Why did it take him so long to do that?" Rogue wondered out loud.
KAMI: (What about the others?)
PICCOLO: (thinking) What ABOUT the others? (flies towards the Big Gete Star)
"Exactly, only Gohan matters," Mira agreed. Her siblings stared at her in horror at the dismissal of Krillin and the rest.
(cut to Gohan, Krillin, Master Roshi, Yajirobe, Oolong and the Namekian prisoners inside the Big Gete Star)
D.V.E.D.: Hello, meatbags! Let me be the first to congratulate you on your selection to have your life juices power the Big Gete Star! I hope the amenities are to your liking!
YAJIROBE: They're not!
D.V.E.D.: Then good news! You won't be staying long!
"Because you'll all be dead," Happy added.
"Thanks, Tom-Cat. We couldn't have figured that out on our own," Carla replied, sarcastically.
YAJIROBE: You're damn right! (punches D.V.E.D., which has no effect)
"He tried," Kagura acknowledged.
D.V.E.D.: Splendid! A volunteer! (grabs Yajirobe's arm) Quick, everyone! To the de-organer! (starts dragging Yajirobe away as Gohan, Krillin, Master Roshi, Oolong try to pull him away)
Some giggles and snorts were heard in the guild.
(cut to Meta Cooler advancing towards Vegeta and Goku)
VEGETA: He keeps kicking me in the dick. Why? Why does he keep kicking me in the dick?
"Cooler's only been going for nut shots and now he's my favorite villain," Minerva felt great all of a sudden.
GOKU: Wait, I think I might have a way to beat him...
VEGETA: If you say hit him really hard. I swear to God, I will kick YOU in the dick!
"Better not," Erza grumbled.
GOKU: I guess we could hit him...really hard. (Vegeta growls) Together?
VEGETA: ...Whatever.
(Goku and Vegeta charge at Meta Cooler full force and ram into him simultaneously, severing the upper part of Meta Cooler's body)
GOKU: Hey, Vegeta! What works? Teamwor-
VEGETA: Finish him off, you gibbering oaf!
(Goku and Vegeta simultaneously fire a blast at Meta Cooler, which finally destroys him. Goku and Vegeta fall to the ground and revert to their normal state while catching their breath)
"ALRIGHT! That's the end of Cooler!" The guild cheered at the Saiyan's victory.
"Ya know, those two really remind me of Gajeel and Natsu," Lucy laughed.
"Almost like their alternate counterparts," Levy joined Lucy's laughter.
"Tch, I wouldn't work with Salamander if he was the last guy on earth," Gajeel scoffed.
"And I wouldn't work with Gajeel, since he's the most annoying Dragon Slayer," Natsu retorted.
"THAT'S YOU!"
GOKU: See? We can do anything by working with each other.
VEGETA: Just shut the f**k up, Kakarrot.
"For once I agree with him," Minerva said.
GOKU: Hey...we beat him, right?
"Yeah, you guys vaporized him," Sting answered.
VEGETA: Yeah, he turned into smoke.
GOKU: Then who's that guy? (reveals Meta Cooler on top of a cliff)
"HUH!?"
"That's right! The Big Gete Star!" Levy reminded everyone.
META COOLER: Hello, buddy!
GOKU: Oh, right. The Serengeti Star.
Natsu didn't say a word as Erza's gaze turned to him in an instant.
(shows a TON of Meta Coolers on the cliff)
The mages gaped at the amount of Coolers standing on the cliff.
"That has to be over 500 Coolers," Jellal spoke.
"How do you beat that if just beating one took so much effort!?" Lector panicked.
META COOLERS: That's right. I am Legion. For we are-
VEGETA: A pain in my ass.
"Couldn't have said it better myself," Laxus said.
(the Meta Coolers descend from the cliff to attack Goku and Vegeta)
GOKU: Well, Vegeta, you take the five hundred on the right, I'll take the five hundred on the left.
VEGETA: Screw you, I'll take five hundred and one!
"That's right. As long as you guys give it everything you got, you'll come out the winner!" Erza believed.
"Just give them another good beat down!" Natsu shouted.
GOKU: That's the spirit! (screams and goes Super Saiyan)
VEGETA: (screams and also goes Super Saiyan)
"YEAH!"
(cut to Goku and Vegeta captured and covered in wires)
The cheers died instantly at the sight of Goku and Vegeta covered in wires. Guess 1,000 really was too much for them.
GOKU: Wow. I can't believe every single one of them kicked you in the dick…
"All 1,000 kicked him in the nuts!?"
It was a real good thing that Trunks was already born.
VEGETA: (whines in a high-pitched voice)
"He can't even talk," The men winced in sympathy.
GOKU: So, where the heck are we, anyway?
COOLER: You are inside...of me.
"What?"
GOKU: *gasps* Vegeta! He shrank us!
COOLER: (his face is shown to be connected with the BIG GETE STAR) What? No. No! I'm part of the Big Gete Star!
"How did that happen!?" Air blew out of Levy's nose in interest.
GOKU: Oh, you're a head. Well, that's neat. Probably don't punch as hard as you used to, though.
"He doesn't have a body, so yeah," Lector said.
COOLER: I'm sure you're dying to know the story.
GOKU: I'm really not interested-
"I am!" Levy rebutted.
COOLER: You see...
(cut to outer space, showing the remains of Cooler's head rolling around when a small chip lands on it)
COOLER: What the fu-
(cut to present)
COOLER: And that's how it happened.
"I'm done," Levy closed her notebook and leaned back into Gajeel's side.
COOLER: And now, with the help of your energy, we shall have everything we need to fuel the Big Gete Star, as well as rebuild myself even better than before.
"Why didn't you just rebuild yourself a new body?" Sting asked, confused.
"That would require proper planning, which Cooler seems to have lost the ability to do along with his body," Levy snapped. Gajeel rubbed her head to calm the petite woman down.
BIG GETE STAR: Beep.
COOLER: Shut up, baby, I know it.
(Vegeta and Goku scream as their energy gets drained)
"Fight back! Don't let Cooler win!" Natsu pounded the table in front of him.
BIG GETE STAR: Beep.
COOLER: Oh, yes. To the last drop. (Goku and Vegeta are shown completely drained) Ah, delicious. Now, to dispose of the two- (Goku and Vegeta grab onto the wires and send more of their energy to the Big Gete Star) What?! Impossible! You were bone-dry!
"They're overloading the Big Gete Star!" Freed said.
"Ha ha! Knew they weren't done yet!" Natsu and the rest cheered in hype.
BIG GETE STAR: Beep. (the Big Gete Star begins detonating)
COOLER: I know, but I can't stop them! Where are the mes? Send in the mes!
BIG GETE STAR: Beep.
COOLER: What do you mean, I'm exploding!
(cut to outside of BIG GETE STAR, showing several META COOLERS exploding; cut back to inside)
"Guess your legion wasn't all that after all," Jellal smirked.
COOLER: Ahh, f-
BIG GETE STAR: Beep.
COOLER: -mes!
(cut to YAJIROBE, about to be cut into two)
YAJIROBE: No, please! You can't kill me! There's someone at home that I love!
"Kourin would be sad," Juvia said.
D.V.E.D.: Beautiful. What's her name?
YAJIROBE: H-h-he's a cat named Korin
"When you say it out loud, however…" Lucy said, but Juvia slapped her with a water tendril.
"We don't judge love, Lucy!"
D.V.E.D.: I am no one to judge. But I do decide your fate. Kill him (starts malfunctioning) slow... slow... slow... slow... (in a deep voice) Drop the bass. (explodes)
GOHAN: Everyone, follow me! (leads everyone out of the room and into an incoming crew of Meta Coolers) Aw, crapbaskets.
KRILLIN: I AM NOT DYING HERE AGAIN!
"Would be best if you didn't," Lector said.
"Frosch thinks so too!" Frosch added.
(All the Meta Coolers blow up and Piccolo appears from the smoke)
PICCOLO: Come with me if you want to live.
GOHAN: Eh, wrong sci-fi, but it'll do.
"At least he's here," Mira shrugged.
(cut back to Cooler)
COOLER: How? It literally doesn't make any sense! It took everything you had to defeat a single me, yet you had enough power to overload the Big Gete Star?! How?! How did you do this?!
"You underestimated Saiyans. The biggest mistake you could ever make," Makarov smirked, satisfied.
GOKU: It looks like you underestimated our power. Just like...
COOLER: DON'T YOU DA-
GOKU/Natsu: ...you did on Earth.
COOLER: Oh. Fair enou-
VEGETA/Gajeel: And just like Freeza.
(Cooler begins screaming and grows a body and Goku proceeds to transform into a Super Saiyan and starts charging an energy blast, but Cooler punches him and grabs him with wires)
"GOKU!"
COOLER: Did Freeza ever do THIS?!
GOKU: Beginning to feel like you have something against your brother.
"Took you this long to figure it out?" Cana asked.
COOLER: Die... (starts squeezing Goku with the wires, causing him to scream) DIE! (screams as his arm gets sliced by a blast shot from Vegeta)
VEGETA: That...was for...my dick... ahh... (collapses)
"The Prince got his shot in. Now finish it, Goku," Laxus said.
GOKU: (breaks free of the wires and prepares a blast) Time to put you...ON ICE! (throws the blast at Cooler's chest)
"You could've tried so much harder," Gajeel was disappointed at the pun.
COOLER: ...Really? (sighs, then explodes, showing his remaining organic skin rolling around in the dust)
"And with that Frieza's family is finally gone for good," Lucy smiled at a job well done.(Cough "Eradicate The Saiyans" Cough)
(cut to outer space, with the BIG GETE STAR about to burst)
BIG GETE STAR: Beep. (explodes)
KRILLIN: Huh. Well, Goku's dead again. Any of you guys got DragonBalls?
"Why is that the immediate conclusion?" Erza asked Krillin.
GOHAN: Wait, look! (sees Goku and Vegeta falling from the sky)
KRILLIN: Wait, is that Vegeta?
(Goku and Gohan laugh like little insanos until Goku crash-lands on the ground which produces an enormous explosion)
"They could've caught them...no reason to let them hit the ground," Romeo said.
GOKU: Thanks for bringing those Senzus, Bean Daddy!
YAJIROBE: It's what I do.
"Yajirobe was useful," Lisanna smiled.
GOKU: You know, I learned something today. In the end, when all is said and done, Freezer was Cooler. And Cooler was Freezer.
"Did he just say that Frieza is cool?" Gajeel asked.
"I still believe he's confusing the two," Kagura said.
GOHAN: ...So, now that it's over, we should probably go find Dende.
"Yeah? Where has Little Green been? He's usually jumping in joy to see Gohan," Natsu said.
KRILLIN: Yeah, where is Little Green? He's the one who invited us to vacation here in the first place.
MOURI: Oh wait, you thought... But he... Oh, my. I think you may have misinterpreted his message.
(cut to Mr. Popo and Dende on The Lookout back on Earth)
DENDE: WHERE THE F**K IS EVERYONE?!
"Why is Dende on the lookout?" Everyone wondered.
("Monkey Vs. Robot" by James Kochalka Superstar starts playing as the ending credits play)
[STINGER]
(shows a space pod in space with Vegeta inside and holding a small microchip)
BIG GETE STAR: Beep. (Vegeta promptly crushes the microchip)
VEGETA: Flawless victory.
"Hn, better than nothing I suppose," Laxus said.
Chapter End