* ~ The Eighth Year Universe Series ~ *
PART THREE
The Eighth Year
Chapter 61: Never Tickle a Venomous Tentacula
Harry had to admit, as he sat in the Hogs Head with a glass of firewhiskey waiting for Neville, he was partly keeping his plan a secret from Draco just to get on the smug git's nerves. Ever since they had all become friends, the Slytherins never expected anything sneaky of the Gryffindors, so Harry had a very Slytherin plan, and he knew that Neville would be able to help him out with it.
"Hey Harry," Neville said as he sat down on the barstool next to his fellow Gryffindor.
Harry smiled at his friend, "Hey, Nev. Firewhiskey?"
Neville nodded, and Harry ordered another firewhiskey which Aberforth slid across the table to Neville, "Thanks Abe," both boys said in unison.
"So Neville, how come you just happened to be in the ice cream parlour at the right time to overhear about Draco proposing to Hermione?" Harry asked. He narrowed his eyes at his friend.
Neville gave Harry a boyish grin that he knew well. It reminded him slightly of Ron, "I just happened to go in to buy ice cream, and I saw you and Draco."
"And you just happened to overhear our conversation?" Harry asked in amusement. Neville's story did not at all convince him.
"I have good hearing," Neville said simply.
Harry shook his head in amusement but left it there, "Anyway, I need your help with Sadie and Theo's wedding present."
"You told me that much last night," Neville remarked as he sipped his drink, "Are you going to tell me what it is yet?"
Harry chuckled, "I'm going to buy them 11 Grimmauld Place," he said with a smile.
"That's a nice idea. There's no way Theo would want to live with Sadie's mother, and I know how he feels about his stepmother. They're definitely going to need their own place," Neville laughed, "Do you want me to chip in on the price?"
"Well, you can if you'd like," Harry said as he thought about it, "I mean Draco said he would, so that way it would be a present from all of us, I guess."
Neville nodded thoughtfully, "What does Draco know?"
"Just that I'm trying to get the house, but there's more to it than that. Muggles want to demolish all of the houses in Grimmauld Place. They want to redevelop it and build over the area," Harry explained to Neville, who understood quicker than Draco.
"Your house will be alright though, won't it? I mean, it's not in the same plane as the muggle houses. It's that kind of charm, right?"
"Exactly," Harry said. He smirked, "You got that faster than Draco."
Neville smirked as well, "I'm a pureblood too; he forgets that. I just took longer to flourish," he said with a chuckle.
Harry laughed, "Well, you're right about the house. It won't be demolished, but the other houses around it will, and I want to try and save 11."
"Why?" Neville asked, thinking about it for a moment.
"Well, I'm planning on giving it out as a wedding present. You'll want to live in Longbottom House, obviously, and once I sign 12 over to Draco and Hermione, I expect they will move in there."
"How thoughtful of you," Neville said with a raised eyebrow.
"I do try," Harry smirked.
Neville chuckled and drank some more firewhiskey, "So, you need a plan to try and stop the houses from being knocked down?"
Harry nodded, and Neville appeared thoughtful for a moment, "Well, I have one idea, but it could be considered as slightly morally wrong."
Harry grinned in a slightly manic way, "Do explain…."
Neville chuckled, "I can only think of one thing that stops muggles from building on sites, and that's the fear of ghosts."
"What are you thinking?" Harry asked. He liked Neville's train of thought.
"We could rope in some of the school ghosts, get them to haunt the buildings and the land so that the Muggles don't build on it," Neville suggested, and Harry pondered the idea.
"It might work, but I don't think it's extreme enough…."
"How good are you with glamour charms?" Neville asked out of the blue.
Harry frowned, "What, like the make-up kind or the forensics kind?"
"The forensics kind," Neville replied.
Harry answered, "Uhh, I'm okay...I mean, I can do a passable job."
"In that case, I have a plan," Neville said. He grinned at his friend.
"Excellent."
The following week was their second week of exams, and it was when some of the bigger ones happened, so Harry wasn't surprised when Hermione's calm bubble burst. It had happened on Sunday night when Draco asked her how the studying was going. Hermione promptly burst into tears and exclaimed that she would fail everything. Sadie, Daphne and Susan had calmed her down, but it had taken about three hours.
On Monday, Hermione, Daphne, Sadie and Lilly were all equally nervous as they headed off for their Arithmancy exam. The boys saw them off and wished them good luck, then frantically studied for their Transfiguration and Herbology exams. When the girls returned three hours later, they were all in high spirits.
"Can you believe that actually happened?" Daphne asked Sadie, Hermione, Lilly and Melody as they all walked into the common room together.
Hermione shook her head in amusement. All of the girls were laughing, "No, I mean not at N.E.W.T level, at O.W.L, I might have expected it!"
Draco, Harry, Theo and Neville shared confused looks as the girls drew closer to them.
"What happened?" Harry asked as Daphne sat down next to him on the sofa.
"Zacharias Smith," Hermione replied with a pointed look at her best friend.
Harry grinned somewhat evilly, "What did the stupid git do this time?"
Sadie was giggling, and Melody smiled and said, "He obviously hasn't paid much attention in class, so he drew up his number chart for the exam and forgot to hand it in to the examiner."
Sadie felt slightly bad for giggling, but Zacharias was a pompous git who irritated her, "He's lost about 40 marks because it doesn't count as part of the exam now!"
Harry whistled, and Draco sniggered then muttered something about how it served him right.
"He's not a nice guy," Neville admitted, "But that is a bit of a shame."
"Nah, it's not," Theo said with an evil grin, "He should have handed it in; it's his own bloody fault."
Harry grinned back at the Slytherin and nodded, "It completely is and let's face it, he's a wanker."
Laughter echoed around the common room, and for a moment, nobody was stressed.
But then it was Tuesday, and there was the Ancient Runes exam. Hermione, Draco, Daphne and Lilly were those in the group taking the exam, and Harry definitely didn't envy them that morning.
"I'm glad she's so laid back," Neville was saying to Harry about Lilly, "I couldn't have coped if I'd still been dating Hannah. She had a nervous breakdown yesterday. Lil works hard and spends more time with books than me at the moment, but at least she's calm like Daph."
"Daphne was a bit worried about this one, actually," Harry said to Neville as they dug into breakfast, "She doesn't freak out like Hermione does, but she's been quite quiet all morning."
"I'm not looking forward to tomorrow," Neville said darkly, "I've never been great at Transfiguration."
Harry laughed and said, "McGonagall told me I was lucky I only needed an E to get into Auror training."
"Well, as long as we scrape through, we're fine," Neville reasoned, "Oh, by the way, I've made the first move towards that thing...for you know."
Harry nodded. Sadie and Theo were both sitting relatively nearby, "Good, when do you think we'll see the first results?"
"Saturdays edition of the Prophet hopefully," Neville said thoughtfully.
Harry grinned, "Perfect. Hey Nev, do you want to go practice some Transfiguration after breakfast?"
"Sounds like a plan," Neville said, "I need all the help I can get."
"You and me both," Harry chuckled.
"Hey," Harry said brightly when Daphne made her way into the common room after her exam, "How'd it go?"
"Good," Daphne said as she dropped down on his knee, "I mean, obviously, it's my best subject because of the curse-breaking course I want to get into."
"Did Smith manage to finish the exam this time?" Theo smirked.
Hermione and Draco smirked at each other, and this time Neville grinned, "What did he do?"
"He forgot how to do a certain ancient type of manuscript," Draco said, trying to conceal a broad grin, "And it was a pretty important question."
"So Ernie tried to give him a hint by pointing at an owl outside of the window," Hermione said as Daphne started to laugh too.
"And he thought that meant the script was written in lines, like an owl's feet," Daphne said with a roll of her eyes.
"When really what Ernie was saying was that the translation of the question was O. W. L. The manuscript was easy; it was just slightly curved modern letters," Hermione said.
"But what Zacharias handed in was a bit of paper that looked like an owl had walked all over it," Daphne sniggered.
Draco shook his head in disbelief, "I can't believe that guy thinks he's smarter than everyone else."
"He was probably just stressed, guys. Cut him a break," Hannah said from the table behind them.
"Aw, come on, Hannah," Harry laughed, "Even you can't stand him."
"He's not that bad," Hannah said, but it was clear that she didn't believe her own lie.
"Yeah, right," Lilly snorted, "I remember you taking him out in the DA. You can't throw a stupefy spell like that at a friend."
"Unless you are Draco, Harry or Theo, of course," Neville added in amusement, "Who have emotionally charged fights with their 'friends' all of the time."
"Whatever," Draco drawled, Harry scoffed, and Theo muttered. Daphne couldn't stop herself from grinning at her fiancé in amusement.
"I'm going to fail this exam."
Neville was pacing slightly as he stood in the entrance hall with everyone else in the eighth year. This morning was the Transfiguration exam, and while most of the group felt okay about it, Neville and Harry were rather nervous.
"No, you aren't," Harry assured his friend, "You did fine when we practised yesterday. Just pretend the examiner is me."
"Deep breaths Nev," Lilly said, she was kind of taking the mick, but she was also trying to be comforting.
Neville shot her an amused look as the doors to the hall opened. They all filtered in and were split up to each be examined on their practical skills before the written exam. Harry was nervous about this part, but he managed to transfigure a goblet into a dinner plate. Then he mostly managed to transfigure a squirrel into a mouse, but it still had a slightly furry tail which he was pretty sure he lost points on. From the corner of his eye, Harry saw Neville do well up until he transfigured his squirrel into a bird which the examiner was impressed with, until the bird decided to do its business on his head. Harry just hoped Neville wouldn't lose marks for it.
By the time the practical and written exams were both over, everybody wanted a break, and they were all starving as they met up in the entrance hall.
"How did it go?" Harry asked Neville because they ended up being the first ones out of the hall.
"Alright," Neville admitted, "Until the bird decided to shit on the examiners head."
"Did he deduct points?" Harry asked. The incident vaguely amused him if he was honest.
Neville shook his head and chuckled, "Nah, thank Merlin. I reckon I might have scraped a pass."
"Me too," Harry said with a chuckle, "But an E is good enough for the Auror selection process, so that's good enough for me."
"Exactly," Neville grinned.
Thankfully there was a gap between the Transfiguration and Herbology exams which almost everyone spent in the common room cramming. Theo eventually broke the silence and the tension by starting a fight with a piece of scrunched up paper which escalated quickly.
Come Friday morning; the mood was different; most of the group didn't need a high grade in Herbology, so they weren't freaking out as much as they had been for other exams. Neville, Hannah and Susan were the least worried; it was like being a Hufflepuff (or Neville) automatically made you good at Herbology. Lilly panicked the most because she needed an O in the subject, but she was almost as good as Neville in the class.
The exam had two parts, written and practical. After two hours of doing the written side, everybody was glad to be doing some practical work in the greenhouse, but it didn't go entirely smoothly…
"Can you believe he ended up in the hospital wing?" Harry asked through his laughter as he made his way back from the Herbology exam with Draco and Neville; the girls were walking slightly behind them.
"He's such an idiot," Draco said in an almost endearing way.
"It was pretty funny," Neville said. He was still chuckling.
"And very Theo," Harry pointed out.
Draco nodded his agreement, "Definitely very Theo."
"Do you think we should go visit him in the hospital wing?" Neville asked.
"No, he doesn't deserve visitors," Draco said as he rolled his eyes, "The stupid tosser shouldn't have tried to tickle the venomous tentacula."
Harry sniggered, "Do you think Madam Pomfrey will be able to reattach his pinky?"
"I hope she can't," Draco said.
Neville laughed loudly, "Yeah, so we can take the piss out of him for it for the rest of his life."
"We should probably go check on him," Draco said sheepishly as the group reached the first floor.
Harry smirked, "I thought you said it was his own fault?"
"It was. He's an idiot, but we should probably still go see how he is," Draco admitted reluctantly.
"Come on then," Neville said as he turned into the hospital wing, "Let's go see your boyfriend, Draco."
Draco glared at the Gryffindor, "Shut up, fatbottom."
"Go give him a kiss, ferret," Neville teased, and Draco glared some more, but he did make his way over to Theo's bed. Harry and Neville followed; both of them were smirking at the scene.
"Hey Theo, how's the finger?" Neville asked with a grin.
Theo rolled his eyes and held up his bandaged hand, "Attached."
"Well done on the intelligence you portrayed today," Harry said sarcastically.
Draco grinned, "Yeah, Theo, bet you've aced the Herbology exam."
"You can't take the mick, Draco," Neville said with a smirk, "You were practically in tears when it happened."
"Even Sadie didn't freak out that much," Theo said with an amused smile.
"Worried about his poor boyfriend," Harry teased, and Draco rolled his eyes and muttered that he wasn't that worried.
After that, the girls arrived, and a worried Sadie ran over, so the teasing stopped, for now.
The weekend wasn't one for relaxing. It was more a time for studying. When everyone gathered together for breakfast on Saturday morning, Harry and Neville shot each other a grin. They tucked into toast as usual and waited for the post to arrive, which it did only moments later.
Only Hermione subscribed to the weekend edition of the Prophet, so when the post came, it dropped the Prophet in front of her, and as usual, she eagerly opened it up. Harry knew the article wasn't on the front page, so he didn't expect Hermione to pick up on the plan straight away, but he also didn't expect her to burst out laughing when she saw the front page.
"What is it?" Draco asked in amusement from her right, and then he glanced at the paper, and his eyes widened.
"What are you laughing at?" Harry asked from Hermione's left, and then he too glanced over at the Prophet.
The front page was dominated by a large picture of Draco and Harry sitting on opposite sides of a table in the ice cream parlour. The picture had been snapped just as they had leaned closer to each other to discuss the plans for Sadie and Theo's wedding present. It was conveniently snapped at the right time to make it look like the two friends were about to kiss.
"The Hero and the Rogue: Potter and Black, more than just an ice cream?" the headline read.
Hermione grinned. She had just scanned the article, "This is brilliant."
"No, it's not," Harry and Draco echoed, which only made Hermione giggle.
"Read it out loud, Hermione," Daphne said with a chuckle as she tried to crane her neck to see the article.
Hermione grinned broadly and did just that.
"Mr Harry Potter, the hero of the war, and his new friend, Mr Draco Black (formerly Malfoy), were spotted on an intimate 'date' last weekend. The two boys were sharing an ice cream in Diagon Alley. Questions have been raised since the start of this friendship as to whether it is something more, although both Mr Potter and Mr Black are in serious relationships, and sources say that Mr Potter is engaged to his long-term girlfriend, Daphne Greengrass. However, this picture brings the issue to the fore once more, so what exactly is going on between the two young men? We spoke to their close friends Neville Longbottom and Theodore Nott to find out more.
"Harry and Draco have always identified with each other in some way," Mr Longbottom told me, "Even when they hated each other, they were sort of longing to be friends but without realizing it. They are both very much in love with their respective girlfriends, but there has always been sexual tension between those two since we were all about 14 years old."
When I asked if they had ever acted on this 'tension', Mr Longbottom replied, "Who knows? Probably. It wouldn't surprise me, what with society being much more relaxed about these things now."
Mr Nott had a slightly different view on the 'friendship' between Mr Potter and Mr Black, "I've known Draco since he was tiny," Mr Nott confided in me, "And I can tell you he was mad when Harry didn't want to be his friend in ou first year. Ever since then, Draco's been after him. He has a thing for forbidden fruit, you know? Anyway, Draco and Harry are pretty much a thing. Yeah, their girlfriends both know about it. They don't mind."
Mr Nott shared his friend's view that the two young men had probably acted on the tension mentioned earlier in the article. Mr Longbottom assured me not to listen to anything that Mr Nott told me due to his tendency to talk nonsense. But could this all just be part of the cover-up?
Watch this space!"
The table had erupted in laughter as Hermione read the article. Harry and Draco shared a glance, and then...
"Long-"
"Fat-"
"-bottom!" Harry and Draco finished, both glaring at their friend, who grinned.
"That's why you just happened to be in the right place at the right time," Harry said with narrowed eyes.
Neville shrugged and smirked at his friends, "Well, I wanted to prank you, and I needed a bit of extra cash, so I just sold the story to the Prophet."
"I'm impressed," Theo said with a grin in the direction of the Gryffindor, "Very Slytherin of you. I have taught you well, young one."
"Theo, why do you know so many quotes from muggle films?" Hermione asked in amusement.
"Muggle Studies exam," Theo said casually, "Film section."
"What other ones do you know?" Hermione asked with a chuckle, "I'll test you."
"Alright," Theo said with a grin, "I have to match them to the films, so say a quote, and I'll tell you the film."
"Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get," Hermione said.
Theo thought about this for a minute, "Oh yeah, It's from Scarface!"
"Seriously?" Harry asked as he burst out laughing, "You do know what Scarface is about, right?"
Theo rolled his eyes, "No, okay, give me another one."
"How about…" Harry said thoughtfully as he tried to think of films Dudley and the Dursleys had watched, "I've got a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore."
"Uh, is that from Titanic?" Theo asked.
"No Theo, slight difference," Hermione said in amusement, "Titanic is about a boat sinking and lots of people dying, and that quote is from the Wizard of Oz, which is a happy musical."
"Whatever, next one," Theo said as he brushed off the fact that he wasn't doing so well.
"E.T phone home," Hermione said.
"Oh! I know this one!" Theo said enthusiastically, "It's from Alien!"
"No, Theo," Hermione managed to say through her laughter, "There was a huge hint in the quote! It's from the film E.T."
"You're so screwed for your Muggle Studies exam, mate," Draco said as he shook his head in amusement at his best friend.
"I should probably start revising since it's next week," Theo said thoughtfully.
Hermione shook her head in amusement and got back to the Prophet. Harry and Neville shared a smirk and pretended to keep eating for the next 5 minutes until…
"Oh my gosh!"
"What is it?" Daphne asked. She had jumped when Hermione had exclaimed loudly.
"There's an article in here you should all listen to," Hermione said, and everyone moved in closer. Nobody noticed the smirks on Harry and Neville's faces.
"Unearthing History shrouded in mystery," Hermione read the headline, "Unearthed mid-week were human bones, along with wizarding artefacts at a housing estate in London. The houses in the street known as 'Grimmauld Place' were due for demolishment, but after the demolishment of the first house, a Muggle archaeological team was brought in. The results of their excavation were astounding, a mass grave dating to an age Muggles call pre-history has been found, and it is believed to be a one in a kind site. The head archaeologist, Professor James Clark, has stated that the site is no longer fit for re-development. The demolishment of the other houses has been cancelled, and the site is tipped to be designated world heritage site status. Amongst the muggle skeletons and artefacts were wizarding artefacts, it is unknown how these came to be in possession of the Muggles. Amongst these artefacts were a time-turner which Muggles believe to be an ancient time-telling device and a quill which is thought to be a sacred feather."
"That's handy," Harry said thoughtfully, "I didn't really want my house to be demolished."
Draco smirked and caught Harry's eye. He nodded as if to say that he understood.
"What in the hell is an archaeologist?" Draco asked as an afterthought.
"Oh wait, I know this one! It's a Muggle person who makes buildings," Theo pitched in.
"Theo, that's an architect," Lilly pointed out through her chuckles.
"Well, it's the other one then, a Muggle who studies monkey bones."
"That's an anthropologist," Hermione said with an amused smile, "And they study prehistoric human bones to learn about evolution, but it's close enough. An archaeologist is someone who digs up the past. They dig up human bones, relics and artefacts, even old houses."
"What's the point in that?" Sadie asked with a frown, "Things get buried for a reason."
"Yeah, I agree with Sadie. What's the point? What do they do with the things they dig up?" Daphne asked as she frowned too.
Hermione had forgotten that in many ways, purebloods still didn't understand muggles, "Well, they don't have great sources to learn about the past like wizards. They don't have many tapestry family trees or written historical documents, so they dig up the past to learn more about the people before them."
"Why do they need to learn about that, though?" Susan asked. She didn't quite get it either.
"They think it helps them to understand how the world works, how society works, and it's also important to them to learn from the mistakes that humans made in the past," Hermione explained. She didn't see why the Slytherins couldn't understand.
"You didn't say earlier, Mione, what do they do with the stuff they dig up?" Daphne asked again. She frowned deeply as she tried to understand this.
"They put them in a mausoleum," Theo answered. He thought that he had remembered something from Muggle Studies.
"I don't know much about archaeology Theo, but I'm pretty sure that's wrong," Harry said in amusement as he drank his coffee.
"Yeah, a mausoleum is where dead people are buried. It's like a house for the dead," Lilly said.
"You're thinking of a museum," Hermione said, "They put the skeletons and artefacts in a museum so that people can go and see all of the artefacts."
"People go and look at dead people and random bits and pieces that came out the ground?" Daphne asked in disbelief.
"That's really disrespectful!" Sadie said, she looked affronted, "The dead should be left at peace, and so should their belongings!"
"It isn't right," Draco agreed, "That people make money out of digging dead people up."
"Ah, well, you know Muggles, they'll do anything for cash," Theo said.
"They do it so that people can connect with their past, Theo," Lilly said irritably, "It's important for Muggles to be able to see the remnants of their ancestors in museums because they don't have the resources to read about the past, especially going back as far as medieval times."
"Fine," Theo muttered, "But I don't get it."
"You don't have to," Hermione pointed out.
Neville cleared his throat, "Anyway. To bring us back to the point, this is quite good. Otherwise, Harry's house would have been demolished."
"You didn't even say anything," Hermione said as she shook her head at her friend, "You might have a bunch of tourists on your doorstep from now on, though."
"Ah well," Harry said thoughtfully, "At least the house will still be there."
"Didn't you say they evicted the tenants in the houses, though?" Draco asked, "Will they get to move back in now?"
"Yeah, I think so," Harry said thoughtfully.
Draco nodded and smirked. The conversation continued on how it was good Harry's house would be okay, and as this was discussed, Draco pulled out a piece of parchment and scribbled a note on it, then signed it and folded it. He walked over to Harry and handed it to him, "I heard Nev was going to pitch in too, so that's my bit."
Harry nodded and unfolded the parchment. It was a cheque for a third of the price of Sadie and Theo's new house.
"It worked then," Harry said quietly as he dropped down next to Neville on the sofa by the fire in the common room.
Neville nodded rather proudly, "They aren't going to build. Well done on the glamour charm, even the head archaeologist was convinced that the skeletons were real."
Harry grinned. His charms had gotten better. He had discovered he was much better in his classes when he didn't always have a dark lord breathing down his neck. What a surprise that was.
"When are we going to apply phase two?" Harry asked thoughtfully.
"Well, we can do it before or after graduation," Neville said as he pondered about that himself.
"I only have one exam next week," Harry said.
Neville nodded, "Yeah, same, so next week then?"
"Sure," Harry said with a smile, "Well done for coming up with this. It was pretty genius."
Neville shrugged nonchalantly, "My dad was weird like that. He was a pureblood who was interested in muggle stuff. He and Ron's dad once spent a summer doing some archaeology in Egypt. They met up there on holiday and stayed for two months," he chuckled, "So I read his diaries about it growing up, and I just thought it might work."
"Well, it did, perfectly," Harry said as he leant back against the sofa, "Are you revising for DADA?"
"Nah," Neville said casually, "Pretty sure I've got it under control."
"I reckon I should automatically get an O," Harry said smugly, "I mean, surely killing a dark lord is proof enough?"
Neville laughed at this too, "Yeah, but you have to prove that you can do the theory," he said.
Harry rolled his eyes, "That's the part I hate."
"You might hate it, but you're good at it," Neville said, "I saw your mock exam result, 98 out of 100. That's better than Hermione."
"It's the only class I'm better than Hermione in," Harry said with a smirk, "And she hates it."
"Is that why you bring it up so much?" Neville asked with a chuckle.
"Yup," Harry replied with a slightly evil grin, "How's Lil feeling?"
"Nervous as hell," Neville replied, "But I know she can do it, and I think deep down she does too."
Harry nodded, "Wish her luck for me, mate," he said as he patted Neville on the back before heading to bed.
The rest of the weekend was spent studying, primarily for DADA, as the only other exams in the final week were Care of Magical Creatures, History of Magic and Muggle Studies, which only a handful of eighth years took.
On Monday, the Care of Magical Creatures exam took place, and something strange happened. Nobody knew what had happened in the exam. Charlie had sworn everyone present to secrecy, but it had ended with a dead chicken, creating a new species of flobberworm by Luna and Charlie being sent to the hospital wing with burns to his arms.
On Tuesday, it was the History of Magic exam, and Zacharias Smith was once again the talk of the exam after he lost it with stress and started to scream at the examiner. According to Ernie and Justin, he had to be dragged from the classroom and knocked out because he was kicking and screaming so much. He was now locked up in confinement in the hospital wing.
"I wonder if he'll end up in Lockhart's old cell," Theo sniggered as they sat in the common room that evening discussing the Hufflepuffs breakdown.
Unfortunately for Theo, Melody happened to be walking by just as Theo insulted her boyfriend. That was how 20 minutes later, Theo ended up in the hospital wing with a pretty bad bat-bogey hex on him. Apparently, Melody had found a friend in Ginny. Suffice to say, the others would never let Theo live this one down.
Combined with the venomous tentacula incident, Theo was leaving his impression on the school. No doubt, he wanted to be remembered years after he had left, just like the Marauders.
There was a break on Wednesday, which most of the group used to practice duelling in the Room of Requirement. They were just honing their already adequate skills for the exam on Friday, and Harry had to admit that he expected Lilly would ace the class as she beat Susan, Daphne and Theo with ease. In the end, though, Hermione ended up being left to duel Harry after Draco had been knocked out of the final three.
As Harry got ready to duel Hermione, he let his thoughts wander slightly. He was incredibly proud of Hermione and how far she had come. She still couldn't beat Harry in DADA, but she was so much better at the practical side of it than she had been when they had first become friends. Harry and Hermione bowed to each other, walked to their respective ends of the platform, and the duel began.
It was fast-paced, and Harry relied on a good, quick shield charm. Hermione cottoned on to this and started firing unblockable spells, which made Harry run and jump around the platform. She was trying to get him out of breath.
Harry wasn't just good though; he was fit too. Playing Quidditch and being on the run had ensured that he didn't run out of breath quickly. Hermione kept this tactic up, and Harry continued with his tactic of trying to distract her and catch her out by firing at her when she was in mid-spell, but he didn't get her.
In the end, Hermione got to him first. Her tactic worked but not by getting Harry out of breath. Harry jumped to avoid Hermione's stunning charm, and when his feet should have touched the ground, they didn't because he had jumped slightly too far back, and he fell off the platform and knocked himself out.
"Ennervate!"
"Do you think he's okay?"
"He's got a pretty big lump on his head."
"He's got a hard head. He'll be fine."
"Hard head? Uh-huh."
"Shut up, Theo."
"He managed to survive Voldemort about ten times; I reckon he can survive a little fall."
"He looks like he's waking up."
Harry opened his eyes and blinked a few times until the world came into focus. He was lying on his back on the hard wooden floor in the Room of Requirement, and Daphne, Draco, Hermione, Theo, Sadie, Neville, Lilly and Susan were all standing above him. Each one looked down on him with concern.
"Are you okay?" Daphne asked as she cocked her head at her boyfriend.
"My head hurts," Harry said. He winced as he touched a snitch sized lump on his head.
"Next time, try walking off the platform," Daphne teased.
Hermione bit her lip as she dropped onto her knees next to him, "I'm sorry, Harry, I didn't mean for you to fall off, I was just trying to-"
"You were trying to win the duel," Harry finished for her. He smiled at her, "And you did, well done."
Hermione gave him a weak smile and helped him up, but he was very shaky on his feet, "We're taking you to the hospital wing," she ordered.
Neville picked Harry up and threw him over his shoulder, which was no easy feat. Since the war, Harry hadn't been so much of a skinny runt. He had gotten more muscle and was heavier. All the same, Neville made it look easy, and Harry rolled his eyes as he was carried to the hospital wing and shouted at by Madam Pomfrey for being there so soon after he'd been discharged the last time.
Harry let her fuss over him as he watched his friends snicker in the corner of the room. Ten minutes and one bandage later, she let them come over to his bed.
Harry got to his feet gingerly and accepted Draco's arm because although his head was bandaged up, he still felt slightly dizzy. Madam Pomfrey had given him a potion to help with that, but she said he had a concussion, so he might feel a little odd for the next few hours.
"Aw," Daphne said from where she was walking behind Harry and Draco with Theo, "Look at them, arm in arm."
Theo winked at his friends, and Neville snapped a picture.
"Harry!"
Harry was lying on the sofa in the common room with his feet up. He had been told to relax by Madam Pomfrey; she had assured him that he would be okay for the DADA exam on Friday if he did this.
"Yeah?" Harry said casually.
Theo rushed over to him and sat down in an armchair, "Everyone else is asleep. Can you help me revise for Muggle Studies?"
"So you do revise?" Harry asked in amusement as Theo handed him a list.
"Sometimes," Theo laughed, "Just ask the questions on the list."
"Alright," Harry said, and he looked down at the list of 6 questions, "Number 1: What is the purpose of a microwave oven?"
"Oh, I know it! It's a box to watch theatre on. It's people acting, but it's all in a little box, and Muggles use it for entertainment," Theo said. He looked quite proud of himself.
"Good answer but not for that question," Harry said with a vague smile, "That's a television that you're thinking of."
"Oh, okay, what is a microwave oven then?"
"It's a box that you put food in, and it cooks it. It runs off of electricity," Harry explained. He looked back down at the paper, "Number 2: What is a monarch?"
Theo thought about this one for a few seconds and then answered, "A monarch…oh, yeah, it's what muggles call convicts."
"No, Theo," Harry said, he chuckled at how clueless the Slytherin was, "It's a King or Queen who rules a country."
"Right," Theo said. He was clearly trying to make that stick in his head.
"Number 3: What must a batsman protect in the game of cricket?" Harry asked. He knew cricket reasonably well. His Uncle Vernon had liked to watch it on the television in the summer, but he doubted that Theo would know the answer given his answers to the last questions.
"Uh, himself, his face…his penis!"
Harry laughed loudly at this, and it made his head throb slightly, "He protects the wickets so they don't get hit with the ball. That's how the game is played."
"Wickets, right," Theo said, and Harry wondered how on earth he would pass this exam.
"Number 4: In Muggle science, water is made of two chemicals; one of them is hydrogen. What is the other?"
Theo frowned deeply as he thought hard on this, "I remember this one…it has the same name as a character from that Muggle book we studied…Lord of the Rings…what was the guy with the thing called…he became King or something…Aragon!"
"You're thinking of Argon Theo," Harry said in amusement, "And that's not the answer; it's oxygen. Number 5: What is the name of the character who becomes King at the end of the Muggle book series "The Lord of the Rings"?"
"Aragon!" Theo said happily, and Harry laughed at his friend, "Correct. Finally, Number 6: Who is the current Muggle Prime Minister?"
"Oh, I know this one. It's the woman, the one all the Scottish people hate because she blew up mimes or something. I always found that weird. Mimes are annoying, but blowing them up is quite extreme and don't mimes come from Italy? So why do the Scottish people hate her?" Theo had gone off into a complete tangent but brought himself back to the point while Harry stifled his laughter, "Margaret Fletcher, that's her name!'
"Her name is Margaret Thatcher," Harry said in amusement, "She upset miners, not mimes, and there were a lot of mines in Scotland and Northern England. That's why they didn't like her in those places. Anyway, she isn't the prime minister at the moment; Tony Blair is."
"Aw bugger," Theo said, "I'm going to fail this exam."
"I thought you wanted to fail this exam," Harry said.
"I do," Theo said with a grin, "I just wanted to check that I could."
Harry snorted and shook his head in amusement at his Slytherin friend.
When Theo climbed into the common room after his Muggle Studies exam, his friends were waiting with amused smiles in seats by the fire, so he joined them and sat down next to his fiancé.
"How did it go?" Sadie asked. She expected the inevitable answer.
"I nearly got disqualified because of my answers," Theo said. He sounded almost proud of this fact.
"How can you get disqualified from a Muggle Studies exam?" Harry asked in disbelief.
"My answers were purposefully idiotic apparently," Theo said with a shrug.
"What were the questions?" Hermione asked. She was both amused about, yet dreading, the answer that would likely come.
"Well, one was about the Titanic. It asked why it happened, so I wrote; because Muggles are stupid and don't know how to drive boats or that boat vs iceberg is a stupid battle."
Hermione rolled her eyes, "Yes, I can see why that might be offensive."
"Another one was "Why do Muggles believe in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy?' so I-"
"Oh, for the love of Godric," Neville murmured, "What the hell did you write?"
"Well, I wrote; because their Muggle parents are liars who invent a fantasy world to make their children feel better. Then the children feel betrayed when they find out they have been lied to, and they end up growing into adults with psychological problems. Further proof that muggle parents are scumbags," Theo said, which initiated much chuckling and eye-rolling.
"Oh Theo," Sadie sighed in a very long-suffering sort of way.
It was Friday morning, aka the day of the DADA exam. Hermione was freaking out, and Lilly was barely eating.
"I'm going to fail this exam! I got an E in my O.W.L. It's my weakest subject!" Hermione panicked.
"Hermione, chill," Daphne said. She shook her head in disbelief at her friend.
"Hermione! You knocked me out with petrificus totalus in first year, and it's a third-year level spell!" Neville exclaimed in amusement.
"You worked out how to protect yourself from death by Basilisk. I'd say that's pretty impressive," Susan added.
"You helped me train for the Triwizard Tournament when we were about two years too young to be able to know any of that magic," Harry chipped in, "I'd say that's an achievement."
"You practically invented the DA in fifth year. What kind of fifth-year can come up with a rebellion like that without a good grounding in DADA?" Hannah asked her friend.
"Then you fought in the Department of Mysteries against Death Eaters without major injury or death," Harry said as he gave Hermione a 'stop putting yourself down' look.
"Then you fought Death Eaters again in the Battle of the Lightning Struck Tower," Neville said, they were all bigging Hermione up, but she deserved it.
"You were Undesirable No.2 in the biggest war our world has seen. What does that say about your magical skill?" Draco asked, although the question was rhetorical.
"Your quick thinking is the only reason I'm here today, Hermione. Without you while I was on the run, I would have died for sure," Harry finished. He squeezed Hermione's hand, "That's proof enough that you will pass this exam with flying colours."
"Any examiner that fails one of the golden trio in a DADA exam will get hung, drawn and quartered by the general wizarding public," Neville added.
Harry chuckled and added, "Or by Kingsley."
Hermione smiled around at her friends, "Thanks, guys," she said, and she seemed slightly calmer as they headed to the classroom on the first floor where the written exam would take place. Lilly had been silent through this exchange, and she remained silent through the entire walk to the exam, although she did at least let Neville hold her hand.
They had a 10-minute break when it was over before the practical exam, but like Divination, this was done individually so they could talk in the waiting area. They chatted and agreed they had all done the best they could on every question, apart from Theo, who had gotten at least one wrong by getting a werewolf mixed up with an Ewok after over-cramming for his Muggle Studies exam.
"What do you think the practical will be like?" Draco asked the others as they all stood in a waiting area.
Hannah was in the large room; she was first because they were being called in alphabetically.
"I don't know," Hermione said, "But I suspect Hannah will go out another door, so she can't warn us what to expect."
"I don't suppose it would do any good now anyway," Harry said thoughtfully, "I reckon there will be something to do with Dementors, Inferi and a mock duel, but I'm not sure what else."
They stood together chatting meaninglessly for a while, and the group slowly got smaller as Susan was called in and strutted confidently towards the door. It was Draco's turn after that, and Harry established that people were in the room for an average of ten minutes. Sadie left the group next, and after that, Hermione departed and had the shortest time yet in the room. Harry hated how far along in the alphabet he was sometimes as Daphne entered the room and was also faster than the average. He found himself feeling quite excited about this exam. Neville left shortly after, and he was only about seven minutes. Theo and Harry stood and talked for a bit; they were trying to keep Lilly calm as they did so. But then Lilly was called in, and she took around nine minutes. After that, Theo was called in to take his exam and again took somewhere between five and ten minutes. Eventually, Harry's name was shouted.
"Potter, Harry!"
Harry grinned as he made his way towards the room and entered. It was just a large room with an examiner standing in the middle. There were a few 'props', and Harry could guess what they were all for. One was a cupboard, housing a boggart that would become a dementor. Boggarts were supposed to take on your worst fear, of course, but they could be altered to shift into a specific thing and take on its characteristics. There was a tank of water in the other corner of the room with what looked like a real Inferius in it, but Harry knew that it wasn't real. It was just covered with glamour charms to give the impression it was the real thing. He knew his stuff when it came to DADA. There was a 'shooting range' lining the back wall of the classroom, which Harry knew was to test the accuracy of their spell casting. There was a long rectangle marked out on the floor in the centre of the room, which Harry assumed would rise when it was time for the mock duel. He had to admit, he was good.
"Ah, the famous Mr Potter," The examiner said with a smile, "The fastest time set for this exam was 5 minutes and 15 seconds. Do you think you can beat that?"
Harry grinned, "I can definitely try."
"That's the kind of spirit I like to see," The examiner said happily, "For you, I'm sure this is simple. Start here, defeat each challenge and then come to the centre of the room for the finale."
Harry nodded and thought to himself, easy. The examiner took out a stopwatch and said, "Your time starts…now!"
Harry walked towards the cupboard with his wand at the ready and a memory fresh in his head. The doors burst open, and a 'dementor' flew out. Harry closed his eyes briefly and thought of the first night he and Daphne had spent together as a couple. All they had done was cuddle and laugh about stupid things, but it meant the world to Harry as he shouted, "EXPECTO PATRONUM!" and watched his stag take the fake dementor out with its antlers.
Harry smirked as he moved on to the Inferius. He was pleased to have his trusty stag Patronus back again. As soon as he began to approach it, the thing climbed out of the water and started to stumble aimlessly towards him. Harry casually cast the firestorm spell and drew the fake Inferius back. In seconds it fell to a heap in the ground, easy.
He moved on again to the aiming challenge at the wall at the back of the classroom. He wasn't sure if it was just judged on accuracy or whether strength and power mattered too, so he took a few seconds to focus and then turned to the targets, which were now moving. He hit all six in under a minute, and he was pretty sure he hit them all in the centre too.
Harry walked back to the centre of the room, where the examiner looked extremely impressed. He raised the platform, and Harry took to one end while the examiner took to the other. The man was shot and plump, which made Harry think he would be an easy target, but looks could be deceiving. They walked to the centre and bowed to each other, then they took their places, and the duel began.
Harry was glad he had practised with Hermione a few days before because, like Hermione, this examiner duelled fast. That was his tactic, to try and throw off a pupil with his speed.
It didn't work on Harry as he dodged or shielded everything the examiner threw at him and, in return, threw spells back at him. But the examiner was just as good at dodging and shielding as Harry was. He moved fast for a man of his stature. Harry caught him out though, he hit him in the legs with a jinx and won the duel. After he undid the jinx, the examiner stopped the timer and sunk the platform back into the ground.
The examiner whistled when he looked down at the stopwatch, "5 minutes and 2 seconds. A brand new record Mr Potter."
Harry grinned and shook the examiner's hand, "Who did I beat?" he asked.
The examiner smiled and replied, "Albus Dumbledore."
This took Harry by surprise but in a good way. He thanked the examiner and left the room where the others were waiting in another hallway.
"Wow, that was fast!" Daphne said when she saw Harry come out.
Harry grinned broadly, "I beat the record. I'm the fastest person ever to complete the N.E.W.T level DADA exam."
"Well done, Harry!" Hermione said eagerly, she hugged Harry, and a few seconds later, Daphne did the same thing.
"Who did you beat to the top?" Draco joked.
"Dumbledore," Harry grinned.
"Seriously?" Lilly asked in disbelief.
"Yep," Harry grinned, "How did you do, Lilly?"
"I know I passed," Lilly said with a slight frown, "I'm not sure if I'll get an O though, and I need one."
"She's being modest," Neville smirked as he put an arm around the girl, "You'll get an O."
Lilly rolled her eyes in a good-natured way, and the others talked about how well they felt they had done in the exam. It was the perfect end to the exams, and Harry found that he was no longer dreading leaving Hogwarts. He looked forward to what was next. He couldn't wait to begin Auror training.
* ~ TBC ~ *