When the boys left for the forest behind the Potter's' house where Remus would transform this month, Lily and Bess settled in to watch a film on the new television. By the time the credits were rolling they were both dozing, and when the boys returned in the early hours of the morning, they found both girls snuggled up on the sofa. Bess grunted as a hello and went back to sleep.
Bess woke to the smell of bacon and groaned, nuzzling further into her lovely pillow. She could smell fruit... no... oranges? She took in a deep breath through her nose and shifted slightly, cuddling more into the soft pillow... which also shifted...
Her eyes still closed, Bess frowned. She felt two arms move around her back and shoulders, and cracked open one eye to see a mass of red hair flowing over a pyjama clad shoulder. Her eyes and head traced up until she made eye contact with Lily, who looked just as confused as she was. Bess shrugged.
"Morning," she mumbled, sighing and closing her eyes again.
"Mm, good, more sleep," Lily replied, joining Bess in falling asleep again for a few more minutes.
They woke again to gentle shaking and James' voice.
"Moony and Peter are still asleep, but breakfast is ready if you fancy it?" he asked, Bess and Lily both staring up at him sleepily.
"Five more minutes?" Lily asked, pulling Bess back into her embrace.
"Uh... well, normally I'd say yes, but we uh- kind of have a guest?" James said, an odd tone to his voice.
"We're under the Fidelius, James," Bess mumbled, snuggling back in. "No guests, 'member?"
"Apart from... you know... Dumbledore?" James whispered in a slightly bemused tone.
Bess and Lily's eyes flew open and they looked between each other and James, trying to gauge if he was telling the truth or not.
"Good morning," Dumbledore said with an amused tilt to his words. He was standing somewhat awkwardly at a respectful distance from the sofas, between the fireplace and the kitchen. "Will you be joining us for a spot of breakfast?"
Bess' eyes widened and she pushed Lily back down. "Password?" she asked, refusing to look at James. Since James had tricked her in January by impersonating the headmaster, she'd insisted on passwords to confirm his identity.
"Sixty-nine, dudes..." Dumbledore replied with an amused crinkle to his eyes, and it took everything in Bess not to laugh. She enjoyed coming up with ridiculous Muggle references for him to repeat as confirmation of his identity.
She nodded to Lily, and both girls scrambled up, trying to adjust their pyjamas. They coughed awkwardly and Bess shuffled on the spot, feeling the blush spread from her chest up to her cheeks.
"I'm so sorry, I'm so embarrassed!" Lily cried, reaching up her thumb to gently nibble on her fingernail, her brows furrowed.
"Please do not worry at all," Dumbledore said with a twinkle in his eye. "I should apologise for the intrusion. I needed a word with Miss Coulson and Mr Black and was invited for a bite to eat."
"Of course! Of course!" Lily replied for Bess and herself, stepping forwards and smoothing out her hair. She gestured towards the kitchen and beamed. "After you, Professor."
"Merlin, Evans, you're already Head Girl, you don't need to keep sucking up. No offence, Professor," Sirius called as he walked from the kitchen to the table, carrying a large plate of pastries.
"Nothing's confirmed yet," Bess hissed at her boyfriend, who rolled his eyes.
"Not to worry, I believe that Miss Evans and Mr Potter will make a splendid Head Girl and Boy," Dumbledore said, turning his gaze upon the table. "Ah! Pain au chocolats! My favourite!"
"Wait... James... You're making James Head Boy?" Lily asked, stepping forwards, gasping. James looked like he'd been hit over the head with a troll's club.
"Of course. I spoke to Bess about my decision months ago. Did you not inform your friends?" Dumbledore asked, raising an eyebrow to Bess.
"More fun this way," she shrugged and bounded over to give a laughing Sirius a kiss. "How was last night?" she asked in a whisper.
"Fine. Moony's going to have to stay for a few more days. It's always harder when we can't roam that far."
"The Order meeting's on Wednesday... He could go home on Thursday?"
"Perfect. Thanks love," he replied, leaning in to rub his nose against hers. "Ready to talk about the vision? Because I don't think Dumbledore's sticking around... he mentioned something about Prague."
Bess had managed to describe what a pensieve was before Peter had arrived in the flat, ensuring that she wouldn't have to say anything in front of Peter. They still thought she was simply uncomfortable with the idea of more people knowing her secret.
"No... But it's time..." she replied, taking a seat. Sirius sat down next to her and grabbed a few pastries for himself as Bess tucked into the fruit bowl.
Dumbledore sat towards the middle of the table, opposite Bess and Sirius, and after a to and fro, James and Lily sat down next to him. James still looked dumb struck, but Bess was pleased to see that Lily was beaming at the news.
"Now, Bess, I'm sure you know why I am here?" Dumbledore asked, not moving to eat anything. He clasped his hands together and leant his forearms on the table.
Bess nodded, swallowed her mouthful, and replied in a low voice, "Yes, of course-"
"Bess," Lily interjected. "Remember, the house has ears," she whispered, spinning her forefinger in the air.
Bess nodded her thanks and turned back to Dumbledore. "Basically... I saw... I saw him..." she said, trying to indicate Voldemort. Dumbledore nodded. "And I know where it is... I just need confirmations of the timing."
There was no disguising the excitement in Dumbledore's eyes. They both knew what this meant - they would have located all four Horcruxes. Now, it was simply a matter of chasing them all down and ensuring their destruction.
"Absolutely brilliant news, Bess, brilliant indeed. May I?" he asked, indicating her temple. "I would like to have a private look before I share with Mr. Black."
"Of course," Bess replied. "Though I don't have a-"
Dumbledore nodded once and reached into his robes. He removed a vial and held it across the table. Bess put her fork down and held her hand out towards Sirius, who placed his wand in her hand. She felt a familiar rush of magic, but this was slightly different. She and the wand both knew she wasn't its master, but she knew that if it came to it, the wand would perform well for her. She trusted it, and she could feel, from the gentle thrum of magic, that it trusted her as well.
Raising the tip of the wand to her temple, she removed the memory and let the silvery liquid pour into the vial while James, Lily and Sirius watched on in awe.
"Thank you. I will return this to you in due course. Unfortunately, I have been called away and so will be uncontactable for a few weeks. This will remain safe in the meantime, I assure you," he added as an afterthought.
"You won't be at the next meeting?" Bess asked, frowning as she returned Sirius wand. "And what about the... chamber?" she asked, reminding him that they still hadn't made it down to the Chamber of Secrets.
"Alas, no, I will miss the meeting, but you will all be left in the capable hands of Alastor Moody," he replied. "As for the chamber, it can wait until my return. We have time on our side for that, do we not?" he asked, tilting his head.
Bess knew that he was talking about the fact that her visions had shown that Malfoy Manor would contain one Horcrux the following summer, so they would at least have to wait until then to destroy all four. Bess and Dumbledore had agreed to wait until they'd obtained the hardest to capture Horcruxes before they began to destroy them, just in case Voldemort could feel the destruction and moved to hide his others more securely.
Bess nodded and let out a long breath, raising a hand to her chest to rub at her sternum - she could feel panic rising in her chest but she wasn't sure why. She felt Lily's foot nudge hers beneath the table and smiled at her friend to reassure her.
Dumbledore turned to Sirius. "Have you used a pensieve before?" he asked, raising an eyebrow and looking over his half-moon spectacles.
When Sirius shook his head and said, "But I'm aware of the mechanics of it. My father had one until I blew it up when I was seven."
Dumbledore's eyes widened. "You... blew it up?"
"He was using it to spy on our teachers..." Sirius replied, shrugging. "Secrets should be kept secret, shouldn't they?"
Dumbledore nodded, and Bess saw his tenseness ease, replaced with a weariness she had recognised in Euphemia at the start of the week. Perhaps, she wondered, exhaustion came hand in hand with old age and an active participation in the war effort?
He gestured vaguely with his hand and smiled at Sirius. "In that case, I will call on you upon my return. Please prepare yourself in the meantime. Having viewed one of Bess' visions before, I must warn you, they are incredibly disorientating. Bess may have experience in focussing her mind and sight on the important aspects of her surroundings, but we viewers do not have the luxury of her precognition. I would hope that you would only have to view it once, but, alas, we will have to keep going until we have an answer."
Sirius nodded and Bess felt his hand tighten around hers. "Not a problem," he replied stoically. And then he asked something that Bess hadn't been expecting. "Would I be able to view the Greyback vision as well? I'd like to see if I can recognise anything."
Bess' eyes snapped to the side of Sirius' face. He had run his hands through his hair enough times that his hair was swept back, revealing his entire side profile. Suddenly, he looked older, more focussed, less jokey.
"If Bess will allow it, I will as well," Dumbledore replied, and Bess let out the breath she didn't know she'd been holding in. She avoided Sirius' eyes, which she could feel travelling over hers. "And with that, I shall take my leave. If I may?" he asked, indicating the pile of pastries. Sirius smiled and nodded, and Dumbledore removed a single pain au chocolat from the pile. "Many thanks."
"Professor?" Lily asked, looking up at the wizard. "Thank you for trusting James and myself with these two positions. We won't let you down. Well..." she said, tilting her head. "I won't let you down."
"I don't like the insinuation there, Evans," James replied, finally speaking.
Dumbledore's lip raised a fraction, his eyes twinkled, and he nodded to the foursome before he strode to the fireplace and floo'd back to Hogwarts.
When he'd left, Bess stood, her chair scraping against the floor.
"Love, I'm sorry. But I knew if I'd asked you first you would have said no," Sirius said, repeating her action and standing. He held out a hand to her, but she moved away from him, still silent, and made her way towards the bedroom. "Love!" he called, and Bess looked over her shoulder.
"I'll allow it," she replied, "but you have one chance to watch it. I won't give it to you again. I- I can't let you see it more than that."
And with that, she continued her path to the bedroom for some alone time and an anxiety reducing shower. Lily was sitting on her bed when she exited the bathroom, a bar of chocolate and two novels in front of her for 'reading time.' They spent the rest of the day together, chatting and reading. Bess surmised that Sirius was somewhere else sleeping, as he didn't return to their bedroom. In fact, Sirius and Bess didn't speak about Sirius' request for the rest of the day, as when Lily and she exited the bedroom at dinnertime, Bess' chest still tight with tension, they found that Remus and Peter were awake.
xXx
Bess woke in the middle of the night to an empty bed. Panting, she rubbed her sternum and tried to catch her breath and calm her heartbeat, which was racing out of her chest. She could feel the sweat beading at her neck and forehead and groaned.
After scanning the room and padding to the bathroom for the loo and to wipe away the sweatiness which had extended under her arms and to the backs of her knees, she exited the bedroom altogether and went off in search of Sirius. The moment she opened the door, she knew exactly where he was.
She could hear the soft keys of the grand piano wafting music down the hall. She followed the tune until she reached the living area, where she stopped and leant against the wall, watching Sirius as he played. His jaw was tight, his brow furrowed in concentration. Her eyes dragged over his topless form, watching him play with such intensity - his shoulders and arms moving as his hands flew across the keys, his head nodding to a beat, his eyes moving between the keys and the ceiling as if he were playing from memory. Which, Bess realised, he must have been, as she couldn't see any notes in front of him. She watched for minutes, listening as the tune built and built, reaching a crescendo.
The intricate music cut off when he realised she was there.
"You play piano?" she asked softly as she approached him. He sighed and nodded, shifting on the bench seat to give her space. She smiled when she saw that he'd pulled on his pyjama trousers before heading to the piano - he probably worried that one of their guests would come across him.
"I haven't for a while. Doesn't really go with the whole rebel vibe, does it?" he asked, snaking an arm around her waist when she sat down. "But I had this stuck in my head."
Bess didn't ask him about why he was up. She knew the answer - nightmares. It was the same reason why she was awake, and the reason why they often held each other in the middle of the night.
"Do you want me to tell you something nice?" she asked, looking up at him, tracing his jaw with her gaze. It was a frequent request when they were sleeping in the same bed - 'please tell me something nice' or 'distract me.' They'd fall asleep talking, and their dreams would be filled with each other rather than their memories.
He shook his head and smiled down at her. "No, it's okay. I just," he reached up to move a rogue curl from her cheek and Bess sighed as he ran a thumb along her jaw. "I just need to play this. If I finish it, it might get out of my head once and for all."
She smiled and nodded, letting him move his hands back to the black and white keys. She watched him trace out some chords before she asked, "What is it?"
"Uh-" Sirius frowned down at the keys. "It's... it's an old wizarding song. Mother would get me to play it when we had guests. Show off the talented heir of the Most Noble and Ancient House of Black..."
"My gain eh?" she teased, and grinned when the side of Sirius' lips raised slightly. "Well whatever it is, it sounds beautiful," she whispered leaning her head against his shoulder.
Sirius chuckled and played a few notes. "It's not. The song's about death."
"Death?"
"Mmm... Well... it starts off with Ravan the Horrid attacking a dragon on his own and then... well, the bit you walked in to was part of the fight. Reg-" he paused for a moment and hiked in a deep breath. "Regulus would sing the lyrics. Haunting really." He chuckled and looked up to the ceiling, his hands resting on the keys now, no longer playing. He smiled and continued, "you should've seen the look on Mother's face the first time I refused to play it. Merlin, she was so angry. But nothing beats the look on her face when Regulus' voice broke in the middle of the second verse a few summers ago." He turned to her and whispered, "there are fourteen verses. And she had friends round."
Bess laughed and Sirius grinned, watching her. "What?" she asked, when she caught him staring.
"Nothing," he said, shaking his head. "Anyway, it starts off with the attack, and then I'll let you guess who won..."
"Ravan?" Bess asked with a teasing smile.
Sirius laughed again, and Bess' smile widened at the sound, her heart racing for a completely different reason now. "Please? A single wizard against a fully grown dragon? I mean... obviously I'd be fine."
"Obviously? Thought about what you'd do if confronted with a dragon have you?" she asked, placing a hand on Sirius' back and beginning to rub up and down in a soothing motion.
Sirius returned to the keys and began to play a slow melody. He smiled, raised an eyebrow at her, and said, "I'm sorry, did you forget I'm a Gryffindor?"
"I think you mean, did I forget your best friend is James Potter..." she mumbled, nuzzling his shoulder with her cheek.
"True... did I wake you?"
"No," she yawned. "But you weren't there when I rolled over for snuggles so I came looking for you. The music was a pleasant surprise... The song's not the only thing that woke you up is it?"
Sirius shook his head and his fingers moved quicker over the keys, the melody building.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
"Nothing," he replied in a quiet, dismissive voice as his hands flew over the keys.
"Pup. What's. Wrong?" she asked again, placing a hand on his forearm to stop him playing, her other stayed rubbing his back.
He sighed deeply and stared at her hand on his arm. "I was just so relieved when the full moon passed and you were safe. I felt happy. And then at breakfast I realised that I have to do it all over again."
"Do what?" she asked in a whisper.
"Worry," he answered as he returned to fiddling with the keys, playing random notes. "My dreams used to be filled with... well, you know... but the new ones... these ones were different. I-" he sighed again. "Bess, what if you grow to resent me? Resent this? Us? I felt free on Friday and that was my first time out of the flat in days. And... and I couldn't help but think about you. And about what you said once... about feeling trapped and wanting to just go for a walk without someone attacking you or having to watch your back."
"Sorry for being such an inconvenience," she replied, her hand stilling on his back.
"What? No, Bess, you're not. That's not what I'm saying, love," he said, playing a broken chord. He rubbed his face with both hands and shook his head.
"I know. I know," she replied. "Sorry. I just... it's a bit too close to home, you know? If I'm completely honest, I- I'm jealous that you got to run around and be happy at the full moon," she sighed deeply. "When I run with a werewolf it won't be quite like that..."
"I'm sorry," he whispered, and Bess felt his hand on her cheek, the pad of his thumb gently wiping away the track of a tear she hadn't felt fall. "And I'm sorry for asking to see your vision... I know I shouldn't have brought it up, I just... I just want to share this burden with you."
"I understand, I think, I just wish you hadn't blindsided me... and you have to promise it won't change the way you see me," she replied.
"Of course it won't, love," he said, kissing her forehead, "Of course it won't. I just know that you've been thinking about all of this the whole time... But then... you- you've been so happy in the past week and I thought maybe it was real. That you weren't pretending."
"I wasn't pretending, pup. You make me happy. But it'll always be at the back of my mind... well... unless Dumbledore takes pity on me and takes the memory," she whispered.
"What d'you mean?"
Bess grimaced. "When I removed the memory so Dumbledore could view it in his pensieve... I felt like a weight have been lifted off my shoulders. The core memory was gone, so all the memories of telling you all everything... that was all blurry or... or something... I don't know... I just- it just made me feel like I was myself again. Worry free for the first time since I'd watched what's coming for me."
"What?" Sirius asked, turning completely on the bench to give Bess his full attention. "Why won't he keep it? If that'll help you-"
Bess sighed and shook her head once. "He can't. I need to remember it to make sure I know which door to go through, or to know... I don't know really... I just think it's not been the right time for him to take it from me yet," she replied.
"But that's just stupid!" Sirius said angrily, raising his hands in the air. "If he could just-"
"Pup, no," she said sadly. She shook her head again and smiled, tears glistening in her eyes. "Dumbledore and I have talked about this already. There's nothing I can do. So please just keep playing," she said. "I want to hear the rest." She paused for a moment and then added, "and just so you know, I don't resent you at all. This flat... you've made it infinitely better for me just by being here. But I hate this situation." She sniffed and wiped her nose on her sleeve.
"Are you sure? Because when I told Peter about you having to stay inside, he said that trapping you in here will all come back to bite me... that he thought you seemed just as unhappy as at Hogwarts. I hate that I'm-"
"Peter's wrong. He didn't read the situation right at all, okay?" she said strongly, frowning at him, her gaze locked onto his jaw.
Sirius scoffed. "He's pretty observant..."
"Please stop listening to him on the topic of us, okay? Go to Remus. Take his advice. I prefer when you do..." she said, leaning in to place a kiss against his jaw. Sirius' eyes fluttered shut and she continued her kisses for another moment. When she pulled away she asked, "but there's something else isn't there?"
Sirius paused again and shook his head, opening his eyes to look down at the piano. "Nothing important... just... James said he wanted to marry Lily. And... and we all know that they're meant to get married and... and..."
"Peter again?"
"Yeah..." he let out a small chuckle. "Peter said that it felt like you had one foot out the door."
"He's been reading Rita Skeeter then?" she asked, nudging Sirius in the side with her elbow.
"It's true though, isn't it?" he asked, finally tearing his eyes from the black and white keys to lock his gaze onto hers.
"No, Sirius, it's not true. My heart and mind is connected to you. It has been since before we met. If there's a door open, it's me trying to make sure you have an escape if you want one. I am wholly... completely... entirely, yours, body and soul. The fact that we can live apart, or fight apart... that we have our own lives and come together to love... I think that's our strength. After our families tried to break us, we found each other. You're my family now. My support. I rely on you, and Lily, and James, and Remus. I trust you all with my life and I would die for any of you. But Daphne chose me to cross worlds for a reason, and I think it's because she knew that I wouldn't give up, I wouldn't stand idly by, and-" she paused, unsure if she should go ahead and reveal something about her old life.
"And what, love?"
"Promise you won't laugh or run for the hills?" she asked, biting her lip and avoiding his searching gaze.
"Of course, love."
A small smile played on Bess' lips as she played the memory in her head. "When Sirius Black died in the books I spent years imagining a world where he didn't die, where I went back to the Marauder era and saved everything and then we got married..." her eyes flickered to his. "So if anything, you're the one who has all the power to break my heart here. Because to me, there's no one else. I only say that we're seventeen and so too young because I don't want to force you into anything... but honestly? If it were up to me... if I could click my fingers and change everything, end the war without more fighting or hunting... and if you had no free will? We'd be married, holidaying in the south of France... we'd abandon the Black surname and switch to something we both liked, like... Stevens..." she laughed, "and I'd be going into Auror training and you'd be doing whatever you wanted..."
"Wow, that's-" Sirius interjected, a bemused smile on his face.
Bess held up a hand. "Not done, pup... We'd spend our evenings going to different restaurants and learning cool magic and stuff, and then the weekends visiting people. We'd have a baby when we were in our late twenties because we'd think it was fun, or we'd decide to not have any kids so we wouldn't turn into our parents. For our joint thirtieth we'd rent out Hogwarts, which I know you're thinking would be impossible, but come on, the Ministry would allow it for a high enough price. And we'd have an epic water gun or paint ball battle using magic, with all of our friends... And then we'd live the rest of our lives together, happy, not wanting for anything."
"Done?" he asked when she paused for breath.
"Done."
"I have a question then..."
"Shoot."
He laughed and asked, "When we met and you called me a prick, how much of you died inside when you thought you'd lost any chance of being with me?"
Bess scrunched up her nose and looked to the ceiling in thought. "Like... twenty per cent?"
"Interesting..." he replied, nodding with a grin. "Well... I can say with all honesty that I am one hundred per cent in that boat with you."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. And one day I'm going to marry you," he whispered, leaning in to kiss her deeply. He broke the kiss with a long sigh and rested his forehead against hers.
"And one day I'll say yes," Bess replied truthfully. "But right now, you're still seventeen and I don't want to force you into anything."
They fell into a silence which was broken by Sirius, who said, "Is there anything I could do which would break your trust?"
Bess didn't have to think, her answer came tumbling out, "Cheating, obviously, but it would break my heart if you got with Marlene McKinnon..."
"McKinnon?" Sirius asked, his eyes widening. He turned slightly on the bench and ducked his head down to try and catch her eye. "McKinnon? Merlin! How d'you know her?"
Bess frowned teasingly and narrowed her eyes when she finally meet his eye. She asked, "How do you know her?"
Sirius grinned at her obvious jealousy, which Bess took to be a good sign since he didn't look too worried. "Two years ahead of us at Hogwarts..."
She nodded and rolled her eyes, arching her back to ease the sore muscles of her lower back. "She's in the Order soon. There's a whole fandom dedicated to you and her getting together in the next few years."
"What's a fandom?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Like... fans of the book series who think you two would have gotten together..." she said, not wanting to spend time trying to explain ships and pairings to him - it had taken him an entire night of chatting to come to terms with the fact that it wasn't just Bess who thought he was amazing from his description in the books.
"Merlin..." he replied, looking up at the ceiling. "I mean, she is pretty fit..."
"I'm sorry?" Bess asked, raising both eyebrows.
Sirius pursed his lips and Bess could tell he was trying not to laugh. "Have I told you lately that I'm going to marry you?"
"Mhmm..." she replied, narrowing her eyes.
"Anything else on your list?" he asked, trying to change the subject, a light tinge of pink to his cheeks.
"Yeah... you could fall in love with Remus..." she replied with a small smile.
He grimaced and shook his head. "Too late for that one, love, you know I can't resist a cardigan..."
"You and me both," Bess replied with a giggle.
"Honestly though, you have more competition from Remus than Marlene," Sirius said, sighing and turning back to the keys.
"Same with you," she countered, and expertly avoided his narrowed eyes and jealousy.
He played on until Bess let out a gigantic yawn and snuggled into his shoulder, when he said, "You should go to bed, love."
"Maybe... do you want me to go?" she asked, reaching her arms around his waist and kissing his bare shoulder.
She felt Sirius shake his head and he gently squeezed her thigh. "Never."
"Then I'll stay for as long as you want me."
"Forever sound good?"
"Perfect," Bess mumbled, her eyes closing, her breathing evening out as she fell asleep to the dramatic melody. Sometime later, the music came to a finish, and she felt herself being carried back to bed.
xXx
A/N: Bit meta there, hope you don't mind! Next chapter will be the Order meeting, so we'll see if it's any different when Dumbledore's away and the five are official members of the Order. Peter may have a redemption arc btw, I'm not completely sure yet...
Thank you to everyone reading, following, favouriting and reviewing - Ghost Claw 001, themugglepadme24 - (thank you so much!), and BlueHairedRaven - (I'll get back to you on this properly! I need to have a proper think of how I do it. Off the top of my head, I think I just write out all of the dialogue as if they're having a normal conversation, then I read it in my head as if the characters are all talking, and just try to visualise what they do with their hands and their faces and bodies, and then try to add that in, almost like stage directions? Then I flesh each bit out and try to add in bits for Bess where she's thinking or remembering something. If I think that someone doesn't have enough 'screentime' then I'll give them some more dialogue so we remember they're there.)