The Devil in Me
I Will Never Be Forgotten With You By My Side
The chapter title is from the song:
Somebody to Die For by Hurts.
1st May 1998
Beltane
Malfoy Manor was full of life for the first time since Imbolc and, coincidentally, Lucius's death.
Narcissa had felt unable to host Ostara, which was why everyone had gathered at Peverell Court, but Beltane was a huge festival. It had been held at Malfoy Manor for several years now, so rather than breaking tradition, Narcissa put on a brave face and planned her first Beltane without Lucius.
The children had played all afternoon and danced around maypoles, as was traditional. The festival was to celebrate the beginning of summer and the days growing longer, so it filled everyone with hope.
Harry smiled over at Daphne as she and Sadie placed flower garlands on the children's heads as they prepared to depart so the evening festivities could begin. She was smiling radiantly at them and laughing when they told her stories; some of them would even hug her.
"Wipe the smile off your face, would you? Only the newlyweds are supposed to be blissfully happy," A voice said from behind Harry.
He tore his eyes away from Daphne and turned to look at Charlie, "Yeah, how are you coping with the heartbreak?"
Charlie grinned and crossed his arms over his chest, "Oh, I think I'll live."
"I'm still not over the irony of you being Felix's best man, you know?" Harry said, shooting his friend a grin.
Charlie winked in response, "Definitely some truth in it, though."
Harry chuckled and looked across the garden at Lydia and Felix. They were smiling and nodding as they spoke to Narcissa, who was congratulating them on their recent nuptials. Narcissa motioned to something in the distance and left, so the couple headed over to Harry and Charlie.
Lydia wasn't wearing white, but she was wearing a traditional Beltane style dress – it was ivory and adorned with summer flowers that Daphne had helped her embroider in.
"I see my sister is already the perfect lady of the house," Lydia said, following Harry's line of sight.
"She likes kids," Harry agreed, "But who would have thought it…the ice queen handing out flower garlands."
"She isn't the ice queen anymore," Lydia said, giving Harry a knowing smile.
"No, she isn't," Harry agreed, "And congratulations again, guys. I know I said it earlier after the ceremony but still - well done, you managed to get married without getting pregnant first this time."
Felix and Charlie chuckled, and Lydia gave Harry an exasperated look, "That is rich coming from you."
"Hey, we did a massive magic ritual, and we still managed to avoid it," Harry said, grinning at Lydia, "Otherwise, we would have been getting married today too."
"Sometimes I think fate is too kind to you," Lydia muttered, hooking her arm through Felix's, "We have niceties to make for a bit longer, then we can get drunk and enjoy ourselves."
"That sounds like a good plan to me," Felix said, looking from his wife to Charlie, "Are you coming?"
"Course," Charlie said, patting Harry on the back and heading off with the couple.
Harry didn't mind being on his own; it just gave him more time to think.
Daphne handed out the final crown and looked around the garden for Harry. When she saw him, their eyes locked, and they both smiled.
It had been a hard year, one filled with problems, but now Daphne was here and soon, she would be his wife. She had come into his life at a tumultuous time, and now, he couldn't imagine his world without her.
Sadie and Draco had been walking in Malfoy Manor's grounds to escape the main garden's busyness. Draco had begun to move on from his father's death, but the first Beltane without him at their family home was proving difficult.
They stopped in a circular clearing between the hedgerows where four statues stood in alcoves carved into the hedges. Each one depicted a different Hogwarts founder – Salazar was the tallest and most majestic looking, typically and his sculpture, of course, gleamed brighter than the other three.
This was one of Draco's favourite places on the estate to walk because it was full of familial history. That was why he had brought Sadie to this spot on this particular day.
"This place is special to me," Draco mused, looking around at the statues, "My mother used to bring me out here as a child when things got too much in the house."
Sadie looked up with interest; Draco didn't talk about himself very often at all.
"And she did that because it meant something to her," Draco said. He swallowed a lump in his throat, "On this spot, 25 years ago to this very day, my father gave my mother an ancestral ring, an heirloom passed down through the Malfoy line for centuries. They were already in a marriage contract, of course, but Father felt that Mother deserved a proper proposal."
Sadie smiled, "That's a beautiful story."
Draco nodded. He looked at Sadie for a moment, then reached into his pocket, "Which is why I think it would be fitting that I ask you the same question today, in the same spot."
Sadie's eyes widened, she had expected a proposal because Draco always talked about it, but she had never expected such a heartfelt one.
"Will you be my wife?"
Sadie opened her mouth, then shut it again. Her eyes were on the ring that was in the palm of his hand – it wasn't new; it was clearly a family heirloom.
"I was going to say no just to mess with you, but I can't after that," Sadie admitted. She bit her lip to hide her smile, "Yes, I will marry you."
Draco smiled in relief and slid the ring onto her finger, "Daphne told me that you would respond better with words that came from the heart."
"Well," Sadie said, smiling and hooking her arm through his, "Daphne is a very wise woman, in that case."
Draco chuckled and paused before they could leave the little clearing. He pulled Sadie towards him and stole a quick kiss, "Thank you. I know we did not start our relationship on the best terms, but it means a lot to me that you were able to see past that."
Sadie's smile was genuine, "Do you remember what I said to you a few months ago? If you abandon a book because you don't like the first chapter, you might never see what could have been a beautiful ending."
Draco smiled back and closed the gap to kiss Sadie again, murmuring another thank you against her lips.
Malfoy Manor was adorned in yellow may flowers, and it created a very warm feeling. In light of Lucius's absence, that warmth was required. Without him striding around in colourful robes looking incredibly self-absorbed, the festivities just didn't feel the same.
"You look so tense."
Narcissa didn't need to turn her head to recognise that voice.
Andromeda slipped her hand into her little sister's and squeezed it, "I miss Ted as much as you miss Lucius, you know?"
Letting out a small sigh, Narcissa nodded, "I know."
"And you have a wonderful son with a good head on his shoulders," Andromeda continued, "Which is much more than I was left with in the aftermath of the battle."
"Yes, I know, and I am grateful for what I do have, I assure you, but - "
"You still long for what you don't have," Andromeda cut in, "I understand. When you love someone the way you loved Lucius…when you give things to a man that you cannot take back? When you love someone with all of your heart and soul, the hardest thing you will ever have to do is let it go, so it will take time, Cissa."
Narcissa brought a hand up to her face and dabbed her eyes, swallowing and clearing her throat.
"You felt the same about Edward," Narcissa said, looking at her big sister, "And you lost him too, but you don't show it like I do."
"I feel it the same way that you do," Andromeda promised, "But I learned how to hide my true feelings a long time ago. When we were young, I learned that fits of emotion got me hurt by Mother or Father. You, on the other hand? You were always the little angel who could do no wrong, so you wore your heart on your sleeve then, and you still do now."
Narcissa glanced down, guilty.
"Do not feel guilty for escaping their abuse," Andromeda said sternly, "You were their miracle child, the one they thought would never happen. Of course, they adored you, just like you and Lucius doted on Draco."
Narcissa looked up at Andromeda's words.
Draco had just stepped back into the main gathering with his hand in Sadie's.
Night had fallen, the children had just left, and the house-elves were lighting the special Beltane bonfires.
"Who is engaged, it seems," Andromeda finished.
Narcissa smiled and caught Draco's eye. He tugged at Sadie's hand and dragged her over to his mother.
She hugged them both in turn and kissed Sadie on both cheeks, much to her embarrassment.
Harry and Daphne, who were standing nearby, had caught sight of the scene, so Harry called, "About time, Draco!"
Draco made a rude hand gesture in his direction only to be scolded by his mother, much to Sadie's amusement.
Tom and Lily were absent from the celebrations because they had taken Amalthea back to Peverell Court to settle her before returning for the evening festivities.
Amalthea had gone down with ease. The nanny elf that Lily had convinced Tom to hire sat by her side to watch over her.
The reason that they were so late back to the party had nothing to do with their 6-month-old.
"They're going to know," Lily said, pulling her dress back on and using a glamour charm to cover up a mark on her shoulder.
Tom smirked over at her, "How? We simply say that Amalthea is going through a 'separation' phase."
Lily shot an amused look over her shoulder, "Look at you, using parental terms."
"Kenneth from my Ministerial office assures me it is a perfectly ordinary phase all infant children go through," Tom remarked.
Lily snorted, "And you have work friends now. Who are you, and what have you done with Tom Riddle?"
"Peverell," Tom corrected, his eyes meeting hers in amusement.
"You'll always be Professor Riddle to me," Lily said, the look in her eyes playful.
Tom chuckled when she turned away to fix her hair then spun around, "Do we look like we just had sex?"
"No," Tom said, pushing his feet into his shoes, "So nobody will know unless you tell them."
"Unless I tell them," Lily scoffed, "It's your stupid little smirk that always gives us away."
Tom opened the door, and Lily stepped out, ignoring the satisfied look on his face as she did so.
"Did I tell you that you look charming in that Beltane dress, by the way?"
Lily shot an exasperated look over her shoulder, "I hate you."
"Hm, what a way you have of showing it," Tom mused, resting his hand on the small of her back as he often did when they walked together.
They left the house, walked down the path and then apparated away.
When they arrived at Malfoy Manor, the Beltane bonfires were burning, music was playing, and in the grounds ahead, people were dancing.
It made Lily smile, "Harry looks happy, doesn't he?"
Tom looked at Harry, who was dancing with Daphne. He cracked a small smile too, "He does."
Lily chuckled as Reyna pulled her dad up to dance. Gus rolled his eyes but indulged his daughter. They had grown closer since Naomi had left for her world tour to 'find herself'.
"Do the flames and smoke of the bonfires really have protective powers?" Lily asked, her hand in Tom's.
"They do," Tom answered. The couple stood on the sidelines. Tom grabbed a couple of glasses of whiskey from a passing house elf and handed one to Lily.
"Beltane is an exceptional time of year. The bonfires offer protection for the summer ahead, and fertility rituals are important. There is a reason that several children tend to be born in January or February, you know."
Lily smiled knowingly, "I don't think it will take long for Lydia and Felix to produce an heir. I wonder what will come first, the Nott or the Rosier heir?"
"Traditionally, the family with the most combined wealth – land and money – is given preferential treatment," Tom explained, "In this case, it would be the Rosier's, and then the Nott heir would follow."
Lily nodded thoughtfully.
"Our first child will be the Black heir, of course," Tom continued, "As it stands right now, Amalthea is the Peverell heir, but if we were to have two male children, she would be overridden."
Lily looked up in surprise, "You want to have more children?"
Tom frowned and looked down, "Yes. Have I not mentioned that to you?"
"No," Lily said, amusement shining in her eyes, "You haven't."
"Nonetheless, it will not be a problem, will it?" Tom asked, "You desire children."
Lily chuckled, "Yes, Tom, I want kids," she agreed, smiling warmly, "So no, it won't be a problem."
"Good," Tom said stiffly.
"I suppose asking you to dance would be pointless?" Lily said, looking over at her fiancé.
Tom gave her a knowing look, "I would sooner put my soul back together again."
Lily bit back a grin, "You're such a drama queen."
Tom looked down to hide a small smile.
A grand feast was laid out on the grounds while the bonfires burned out – once they had finished eating, the couples would dance around and jump over the flames of the bonfire to grant them good luck and fortune for the year ahead.
During the feast, it became apparent that Beth, who had married Fitz not long after Imbolc, was pregnant. This was discovered when Beth turned green upon the sight of something, and Fitz then said something stupid, therefore letting the cat out of the bag.
The friends talked about the revelation, and Ginny had brought it up by saying how happy she was that her Aunt Beth was finally getting her happily ever after.
Harry had responded, "Her happily ever after? What do you think this is, a Disney film?"
And Ginny had thrown a bat-bogey hex at him, which Daphne had deflected with a shield of ice. The whole thing had been a joke, and Narcissa had glared down the table at them,
"No duelling on Beltane!"
"Sorry, Mum," Harry and Draco had echoed, making Narcissa crack a genuine smile for the first time all day.
"It is nice to see them get a happy ending though," Draco had said, his eyes on the couple further up the table, "He spent so long keeping an eye on her but not being with her, and he never told anyone about it."
The others nodded their agreement.
"It's funny, isn't it?" Draco mused, "The big regrets in life that people keep to themselves."
"Oh, I don't know," Sadie said thoughtfully, "I tell people about you."
Everyone in the vicinity of the newly engaged couple burst out laughing at that. Draco was too happy to even pretend to be annoyed at her. He just shook his head and smiled as his friends and family enjoyed themselves around him.
The happiness and harmony were broken before long, though.
Astoria stormed over to Daphne and Harry with a furious look in her eyes. She sat down irritably across from her sister and glared at her.
"Good evening, Astoria," Daphne said calmly, "What have I done to warrant such a reception from you?"
"Father and Elijah Smith have just concluded their 'business' for the evening," Astoria said, the look on her face a sour one.
"What business could Father possibly have with Elijah Smith?" Daphne asked, frowning over at her parents.
"He has agreed to a marriage contract," Astoria said irritably, "Between myself and the Smith heir, Benedict."
"The Slytherin the year below you?" Daphne asked.
Astoria nodded, "Look at him, with his floppy hair and his stupid smile, ugh!"
"Would you rather have married a salty old Death Eater?" Harry mused, "Because that was the other option."
Gus, who was sitting next to Harry, snorted and said, "Tell it like it is, kiddo."
Reyna chuckled and looked at her father gratefully, "Thank you for not marrying me off to the likes of Travers."
"You live your own life, Reyna," Gus said with a smile, "You are proving to be a damn good Healer. I'll give you until your 30 to either decide to marry or enact the Marriage Law."
"Very reasonable of you, Dad. Are you feeling okay?" Reyna joked.
"He's drunk. Take it while it's going," Harry said, grinning at his mentor and now, his boss.
Gus rolled his eyes at that, and from across the table, Draco said, "Still, marrying a Smith, Astoria? Tough luck."
"Yeah, that does suck," Harry agreed.
Daphne gave Harry a pointed look and muttered, "Not helpful, Harry," under her breath.
Astoria glared at him, "Just remember that if it weren't for you convincing Father to rip up the marriage contract, I could have married Draco Malfoy."
"Trust me, you don't want to marry Draco Malfoy," Sadie cut in.
Draco looked at her in disbelief, "I'm right here."
"Yes, I know," Sadie remarked, looking back at Astoria, "He's high maintenance, sensitive and far too focused on his hair. You'll be much better off with Benedict Smith."
Astoria glared across the garden at Ben Smith, who waved at her overly eagerly.
"Ugh, how I am going to marry that?" She muttered to the amusement of her family and friends.
* TBC *