Bella PoV

God, how much I wanted this.

Wanted him.

I had wanted this for such a long time.

He got up for one moment and looked for something in the pockets of his jeans and I had to smile with amusement. Always prepared, it seems.

Then he was once again with me, smiling, touching, kissing.

When he came to me, it was nothing like the movies or the books said.

There was pain, yes, a little but it was oh so perfect.

This was the ultimate way of love, the closest you could be and it was everything I had always dreamed it would be.

I locked my hands in his neck and looked at him as he started moving. It felt strange and new but it also felt so, so good.

He buried his face in the crook of my neck, breathing my name again and again and I love you, I love you, I love you

"I love you too. So, so much," I whispered into his ear and that was the moment his whole body stilled, turned to stone for few seconds before it relaxed against mine. He was crushing me with his huge body but I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. Being trapped between him and the mattress, I felt so secure and warm; I never wanted it to stop.

Far too soon he rolled off me and lay, breathing heavily, at my side, his gaze locked firmly at my face as if he was looking for something.

Pain? Regret? Disappointment? Embarrassment?

But I showed him nothing of these. Instead I smiled, reached out, touched his face, said "I love you" and then, finally, he returned the smile. He quickly tossed something on the floor next to the bed before he drew my into his arms, spooning me from behind, holding me as tight as he dared. His heat surrounded me as did his arms, locking me in a cage of pure safety. I hummed quietly, the song I had heard him sing at the truck the other night and I felt him chuckle lightly when he recognised the tune. "So you were awake after all" he murmured, already half asleep.

"I like to hear you sing..." I didn't know if he was still hearing my answer because his breath was coming evenly by now. But his grip didn't loosen, even in his sleep he guarded me and kept me safe.

I closed my eyes too without giving in to sleep. Not yet. I wanted to savour this moment just a bit longer, the heavy air, his hot body, the pale light of the moon and the absolute stillness apart from his breathing.

I wanted to hold on to this moment forever because who could tell how many of these we had left?

In the end, sleep overtook me but locked in his safe embrace, the nightmares, after so many months, stayed away.