Warning/Mini spoiler: There will be smut in this chapter. Slow, loving smut is the best way I can describe it. If you aren't into that then you can just skip that part. Otherwise, hope you enjoy! :)
LEVI'S P.O.V.
It was roughly a week and a half later and a few days before the expedition. From then on there days had been a flurry of movement, training, formation memorising and meetings. Levi barely got to see the brat in the day and when he did, they had to act normal towards each other. It was agonising and he knew they both needed more. Yes, they slept together in Levi's room every night but by the time they're heads hit the pillow they barely had enough energy to move into each other and relaxing in the comfort the other provided before falling asleep.
On the upside, Levi slept a full 8 hours every night the brat was in his arms. It was strange at first, but the new feeling was not unwelcome. He needed the sleep to get through the long days, so he was pleased Dilan was there. And despite the lack of time they spent together during the day, they were doing really well. Like insanely well. Levi was happy for the first time in a long time and from the constant smile on Dilan's face when they were together, he could only deduce she felt the same.
Levi only wished they had more time to be together before getting back to their busy lives.
He looked up as a knock on his office door rang out. His bedroom had sufficed but he had taken a second room in the castle as his office when the papers started piling up and he needed a real work area. He was currently dealing with a rather large stack that didn't seem to lessen no matter how much time he spent on it.
"Come in." Levi said and the door opened to reveal Eld.
"Telegram for you, sir." He informed, refusing to meet Levi's eyes.
Things with Eld and himself had been tense. The blonde was clearly slightly jealous of what he lost because of his fucking hormones. Levi could see it in his eyes. He was still in love with Dilan even but he had accepted she had moved on, which is why her and Eld were completely back to normal, laughing and joking around. Dilan had even gotten up early the other morning to have a training session with him like they used to. Levi was happy Dilan was. And yet his relationship with Eld was definitely lacking. Not that they had been particularly chummy in the first place but it was rather awkward.
Levi didn't really care. As long as he was treating Dilan right, he didn't give a shit how Eld acted towards him, within reason.
He was still his superior after all.
Levi stood up and took the paper, before sitting back down. He raised an eyebrow as Eld was still standing there. Normally the blonde was eager to escape his company whenever he could.
"Need something, Gin?" He asked. Eld swallowed.
"I'd like to talk, sir." He informed, standing firm. Levi observed him for a second.
He had no doubt this was about Dilan.
"Very well." He replied. Eld nodded and stepped inside, closing the door behind him. Levi crossed his arms, gesturing him to the armchair across from his desk. "What about?" He asked. Eld looked nervous but it was clear he had something to say and he was going to say it.
"I think you know, sir." He replied boldly as he sat down. Levi pursed his lips and didn't reply. Eld swallowed again. "About you and Dilan... I wanted to make sure of a few things." He explained. Levi raised an eyebrow.
"And they are?"
"Well sir. We both know I was a dick to Dilan. Especially towards the end of our relationship, I was a real asshole." He sighed. Levi frowned at the mention. Dilan had told him about the fights her and Eld had while they were still together some time ago after making Levi promise not to react. Levi had almost broken that promise when he heard the blonde shit wanted to take her to a psychiatrist to 'fix' her 'irrational' fears of intimacy. Never had he wanted to punch someone in the face more.
But Dilan didn't tell him to get Levi to resent Eld, she simply wanted to talk about it because while Eld didn't know what damage he caused it did still hurt her and talking to him about it made her feel better. Levi agreed, he wouldn't hold any added resentment towards him, but it was hard to keep that agreement sometimes.
"Well aware." He replied sharply. Sometimes meaning, right now. Eld looked at him nervously.
"She told you. The stuff I did... said... before? Everything?" He asked.
"Enough." Levi replied. Eld sighed.
"There are no excuses." He mumbled.
"Not. There aren't." Levi replied.
Eld frowned at his tone but didn't retort, refocusing.
"I just... now that she's gone, I realised what I lost. What I gave up for something so trivial and unimportant in the long run." Eld explained, rubbing his face. Levi could pity him for that. He had indeed giving up something priceless. There was more to love than sex.
Levi sighed.
"What do you want, Eld? Is this some fucked up way of asking for her back, because she's not a piece of property." Levi frowned slightly, unsure of what he was doing here.
Eld took a breath.
"No sir, that's not what I'm here for. I've accepted you make her happy and that you are together. I just wanted to make sure you treat her right. That you treat her the way I should have treated her. I wanted to make sure you don't make the same mistakes I did because she's an amazing person and she deserves better than what I gave her." Eld said seriously and Levi was slightly taken a back.
He was giving him advice, huh?
Levi's first instinct was to reply with some snarky comment that he didn't plan on fucking up like Eld did, but seeing how sincere the blonde looked made him take another second before replying.
"Like I said before Eld, I've loved her for 7 years. She means everything to me. Trust me, I know what I have, and I'll treat her right." Levi replied seriously and Eld's eyes widened in shock that he had been so open. Levi watched as the shock morphed into relief and he smiled sadly.
"Thank you, sir." Eld said, standing, turning to leave.
"She looks happier now... now that you two are friends again." Levi said, feeling like he owed Eld something to show he accepted them as close friends just like Eld had accepted them as a couple.
Eld smiled gratefully.
"She's not the only one. I'll get back to work now, sir." Levi nodded, watching Eld leave the room, looking at lot more satisfied then when he entered.
Levi hoped he would find peace now and move on with someone else.
With his office empty again, Levi unfolded the paper, reading the telegram. He frowned immediately. Apparently, Erwin needed him for some meeting tomorrow in Sina, advising that he ride up late this evening and get a hotel before attending the next day if he didn't want to get up at the ass-crack of dawn. The last thing he needed was more time away from the brat. Levi scowled at it, scrunching up the paper and throwing it in his bin. Then an idea came to him and he bit back a smirk at his own genius, standing and leaving his office.
He found Dilan with Eren on the sparing fields. The boy was getting a lot better with her instructions, but he was still pretty shit. However, if anyone was going to make Eren into a real fighter it was Dilan.
"Dodge." Dilan advised as she threw a left hook to his face. Eren dodged by a hair, barely making it, even with the warning. "Dodge." Dilan ordered again, taking a punch at his shoulder and Eren's eyes widened as he stumbled back, almost falling over. "Now attack." Dilan smirked as Eren took his chance to throw a punch and missed terribly, Dilan taking the opportunity to swipe his feet causing Eren to fall on his ass with an oomph.
"Ow." He pouted. Dilan chuckled.
"You'll get better. You need to anticipate my attacks, Eren, and start throwing some of your own in without me telling you to. I can't spoon-feed you forever, kid." Dilan pointed out, not unkindly. Eren sighed, wiping some sweat off of his forehead.
"I know, I'll try harder, I promise." He replied with determination as Dilan helped him up. Dilan smirked, nodding in approval.
"Thats what I like to hear. Again." She said and Eren's eyes widened, clearly exhausted.
"Again?" He rasped.
"Oi, take a break." Levi ordered to Eren as he got closer and the sweaty boy looked eager to comply, stumbling over to his water and glugging it down. Dilan looked at him and smiled and Levi had to will himself not to smile back. "Pack a bag, we're going to Sina tonight." Levi informed. Dilan raised an eyebrow.
"All of us? Why?" She asked, confused. Levi let the smallest of smirks play on his lips.
"Not all of us, just me and you. I've got a meeting tomorrow and Erwin told me to get a hotel. I want you to come with me." Levi informed, watching with amusement as the brat's eyes lit up and she had to bite her lip to keep from smiling too wide.
Then her face fell a bit.
"But... should both of us be gone? What if something happens?" She asked, worried. Levi checked no one was watching before brushing his hand up against hers and giving her a small smile.
"It's just until tomorrow afternoon. Eren will be locked in the cellar for most of the time, they'll be fine. Besides... I need some time alone with you." Levi admitted softly, delighted as Dilan blushed a bit. She smiled, giving in quickly.
"Okay. When?" She asked.
"Just before dinner. Be ready by the stables." Levi explained and Dilan nodded, giving his hand a brief squeeze before walking back over to Eren. Levi supressed another smile, watching her go for a moment before walking back to his office, looking forward for to their evening away.
DILAN'S P.O.V.
Dilan tried hard to supress a smile as she hurriedly packed some random clothes into her bag. She didn't need much as they were only staying overnight but she assumed they would be wearing something other than their uniform some of the time. The last week had been hard but so rewarding in its own way. Eren was improving every day, at the beginning he wasn't even able to dodge her quick punches.
Her time with Levi was always perfect. She would agree that she needed some more time with him alone but given how crazy everything was she was happy just to stay in the same room. She was happy to be in his arms and talk to him. Of course, that didn't mean she didn't crave more either. She was excited for tonight.
Dilan looked up as someone knocked on her door.
"You can come in." She said while zipping up her duffle bag. The door opened and Petra came through, smiling at her. Dilan smiled back. "Hey, what's up?" She asked. Petra opened her mouth but looked around her and saw the bag.
"Going somewhere?" She asked.
"Oh, err- yeah. Me and the Captain have a meeting with Erwin so we're heading up to Sina tonight." She replied, hoping she didn't sound too awkward.
Petra smiled and shook her head slightly, going over to her bed and laying down, staring at the ceiling.
She sighed.
"I know you and the Captain are together." She informed and Dilan froze, her eyes widening.
Shit!
Dilan opened her mouth, but no words came out.
Eld, that snitching mother fucker!
"It's okay Dil, I'm not mad." Petra added and Dilan's face softened, seeing the tears behind her eyes. She sighed and laid down on the bed next to her, taking her hand.
"I wouldn't blame you if you were. In fact, I give you my full permission to curse me out right now." Dilan replied, hoping to ease the tension slightly. Petra chuckled, wiping the tears from her eyes she shook her head.
"No, I'm not mad." She repeated. Dilan looked at her, unsure if she was telling the truth or not but decided to ask a different question.
"How did you find out?" She asked carefully. Petra smiled.
"It's obvious to anyone who has brains, you aren't that great at hiding it and neither is the Captain." She giggled as Dilan's eyes went wide.
"Everyone knows?!" She exclaimed. Petra laughed a bit, shaking her head, she turned on her side to face Dilan and Dilan did the same.
"I said anyone with brains. Eren and Oluo have no idea. Eld knows but you know that. Gunther found out too. It's the real reason you and Eld broke up, right?" Petra asked. Dilan sighed.
"Part of it, for sure, but me and Eld weren't right for each other. I couldn't give him want he needed; we were miserable in the end." Dilan explained. Petra nodded in understanding. She closed her eyes and took a breath, clearly trying not to cry. Dilan's heart lurched. "Petra I am so sorry. For a lot of things. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, I'm sorry I never told you that I liked him..." She trailed off. "I'm just... I'm not sorry that it happened. I'm sorry that I hurt you, but I love him. Please forgive me." She asked quietly, blinking back the tears.
Petra opened her eyes to give a sad smile, a tear dripping down her cheek.
"There's nothing to forgive Dilan. I'm not going to be pissed at you for loving someone. It's how I know if the situation was flipped you wouldn't be mad at me." She said logically and Dilan nodded in agreement. "Yes, it does hurt. I... I've loved him for a long time and he never saw me in that way." Petra sighed and Dilan squeezed her hand for support. "But it's comforting to know there was a reason for that. It's not that I wasn't good enough. He already had eyes for someone else. He was already head over heels for you." Petra sniffed, she let out a half laugh, half sob and another tear fell down her face.
Dilan sat up to pull her into a hug. Petra sniffed again and hugged her back tightly.
"It's pathetic but I-I feel like my hearts broken." She sobbed a bit and Dilan blinked out a tear of her own, hugging her tighter.
She wished she could do something to help her.
"It's not pathetic, Petra. Your love for him is real. What you feel for him is real. Don't call yourself that." Dilan comforted. Petra sniffed and nodded in understanding.
"Are you happy?" She whispered after a moment of silence. Dilan bit her lip, trying not to cry at the sadness in her friend's tone.
"Yes." She replied truthfully but felt guilty for doing so.
Petra took a deep breath and hesitated before pulling back to look at her, smiling.
"Then I think I'll be okay." She said genuinely, squeezing Dilan's hands. Dilan blinked at her, causing another tear to drip down her face. She didn't want her to try and get over this before she was ready.
"Petra-"
"No, I'm serious. I may love the Captain, but I love you too and I like to think our bond is a lot stronger. He's a dream that I've created but my friendship with you is a reality. You're like a sister and I love you. If he makes you happy, if he's your dream then I think I can find peace and move on with someone else eventually." Petra explained kindly. Dilan sniffed, her eyes glossing over again at the sweetness of this girl.
"He is." Dilan admitted in a voice thick with emotion. He was her dream, there was no denying that. Petra smiled.
"Then I'm happy for you." She said genuinely. Dilan smiled and hugged her again.
"I love you, Petra. You'll find your dream again; I know you will." She reassured and Petra chuckled.
"I know." She sighed in content, pulling back.
She took a breather, wiped her eyes and smirked. Dilan blinked at her shift in attitude.
"Now I need the dirt. Dish, girl." She asked with a grin. Dilan looked at her in surprise.
"Isn't it too soon to be..." She asked hesitantly. Petra rolled her eyes and smiled.
"Please. If I don't get to be with him I at least wanna hear what I'm missing. I want all the dirty details to make myself feel better. How is he in bed?" She smirked evilly and Dilan's eyes widened in mortification, the heat rising to her cheeks.
"Petra!" She squeaked, embarrassed. Petra burst out laughing.
"Come on! I want the dirt! Give me the dirt!" She begged, shaking Dilan's shoulders. Dilan rolled her eyes but cracked a smile anyway. She would give Petra something, to get her mind off of things because somehow talking about Levi to get her mind off of Levi made sense to Petra.
"Okay but you cannot tell him I told you this." Dilan warned seriously. Petra's eyes lit up and she grinned, nodding eagerly. Dilan smirked. "Levi likes to cuddle." She informed and Petra's jaw slacked.
"NO FUCKING WAY!" She screamed and they both burst out laughing. Of course, Dilan found it adorable, but it was still hilarious that such a violent man liked to cuddle. In that moment, with them both convulsing with laughter, Dilan had never been more grateful for her friend. She knew it must still hurt but she was choosing to accept her and Levi together, choosing to accept Dilan's happiness.
It was such a selfless, Petra, thing to do and Dilan loved her for it.
Later that evening, dinner was over, and the squad had retired to bed after Levi told them of their surprise trip to Sina. Dilan was waiting by the stable, bag in hand, trying to control her excitement. It was cold out, so cold you could see breath in the air when people spoke. Dilan always loved this kind of cold. In fact, she was reminded of the night Levi kissed her at that party. The thoughtful bastard had even lent her his jacket.
Dilan smiled at the memory, stroking her horse's neck.
"Ready, brat?" Levi's deep voice sounded from behind her and she smiled, turning around to look at him. She had gotten used to him sneaking up on her by now.
Well... most of the time.
But what she hadn't gotten used to was Levi in casual wear. Her eyes widened without permission, seeing him in a neat grey and black suit, a few of the top buttons undo with a black collared over-coat on the top. He smirked, seeing her stare at him.
"Are you ogling, Dilan?" He teased slowly. Dilan was too busy to be distracted by his teasing. She walked over to him, dropping her bag to smooth her hands down his chest in appreciation. Was it possible to see abs through shirts because she was pretty sure Levi was pulling it off. Levi gulped audibly, bringing her out of her musings and she looked up at his face, instantly spotting his red cheeks and a smirk filled her face.
"Are you blushing, Levi?" She teased back in the same tone he used. Levi glared at her and she laughed but the noise was swallowed as Levi captured her lips in a needy kiss. Dilan responded instantly, grabbing his perfect shirt and pulling him closer, her back eventually hitting a wooden beam of the stable. They were out in the open, anyone could catch them at any time but that just made the experience all that more thrilling to Dilan.
She tugged on his shirt, letting Levi know what she wanted without breaking the kiss. She had a sudden impulse to feel the muscles under his shirt and she wanted to feel them now. She had never been this impulsive when it came to physical matters such as this, but she had the urge and she was going to go with it.
Levi didn't say anything but untucked his shirt and Dilan was glad he did, so she knew he was comfortable. Everyone has boundaries no matter who they are, and Dilan never wanted to cross his, like he would never want to cross hers.
Dilan let go of her hold on the shirt to slide her hands underneath and over the warm muscles, feeling Levi tense at the contact and shiver in response. From the way Levi moved closer so she could feel more of him, Dilan could only assume it was a pleasurable shiver. Dilan kissed him slowly while she explored his chest with her hands, stroking down the ripped muscles and enjoying the shudders she received in response.
After an unknown amount of time later, they had to break for air, panting heavily and resting their foreheads together. Levi's breaths were almost shaky, and Dilan pulled back slightly to make sure he was okay, blinking in slight shock when she saw how dark his eyes were.
Was that arousal? Did her eyes look similar?
Over the past week and a half, spending more time with him she had gotten a lot more used to the feeling that had shocked her so suddenly before. It was still weird to feel but more exciting than scary these days. That didn't mean she didn't have worries. What if she was never able to give him that? Would he resent her for it? Would they end up like her and Eld did? Would she lose the man she loved because she was so fucking broken?
"Hey." Levi called softly, cupping the side of her face and making their eyes meet. Dilan noticed his eyes weren't as dilated, but they were concerned. "What's wrong?" He whispered, smoothing his thumb over her cheekbone.
Dilan looked at him for a moment, seeing how much love was in his eyes and that was all she needed to reassure her. Levi loved her for her. He would never resent her for such a thing. Besides, maybe with Levi... things would be different.
Dilan smiled at the thought.
"Nothing. I'm great." She said truthfully. Levi observed her for a second before nodding in approval. He smiled and kissed her again before tucking in his shirt and leading them both back into the stable. He picked up her bag that she'd dropped, as well as his own that he had forgotten at some point during their kissing marathon and tied them onto the saddle of his horse before untying the horse from its post.
Dilan blinked, noticing he had only prepared one horse with a saddle. They were sharing?
"Aren't we taking two? What if someone sees?" Dilan asked. Levi smiled at her.
"Anyone who sees won't give a shit. We're going to Sina. Anyone there is so shoved up their own asshole that they are oblivious to anything around them." Levi joked and Dilan laughed.
"Have I ever told you, you have such a beautiful way with words?" She asked, wrapping her arms around his neck. Levi rest his hands on her waist and pulled her closer, smirking.
"No, but you should more often." He teased back and Dilan laughed as he kissed her. "So? Do you not want to share with me or something?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Dilan rolled her eyes.
"Course I do, idiot." She scoffed. She would take any chance to be closer to him and the bastard knew that. Levi smirked at her answer, letting go of her for a second to mount his horse before offering a hand up. Dilan smiled, taking the hand and accepting the help, taking her place behind Levi, she didn't hesitate to wrap her arms around him and bury her head into his shoulder.
So freaking warm.
Levi snickered, lacing his hands with one of her own briefly, to give it a quick squeeze and making her smile as a result before pulling out of the stable and trotting towards town. Dilan kissed his neck and snuggled into him, happy for this time alone together.
It was an hour before they reached Sina and Dilan stared at all the bright streets in wonder. She had never been to Sina when it was dark, and she had certainly never been to this part of town before. Whenever she was in central Sina, it was for boring meetings at the deliberation hall. If they ever came into Sina for leisure, they never came this far in or they wouldn't be able to afford anything. But even on the outskirts, the quality was much better than Trost. This really was high society.
They were a bunch of pricks but Dilan could still appreciate the nice things that the pricks have.
Levi led them down a street into a fancy ass looking stable and they dismounted. Levi gave the man some money and he led their horse away. Levi turned back to her and smiled, taking her hand. Dilan squeezed the hand back as Levi started leading them along. Assuming Levi knew where she was going, Dilan took the time to look around, appreciating all the amazing sights. When Dilan snapped back into reality, she realised they were heading down a street of loud restaurants.
"Is the hotel down here?" Dilan asked, curiously. Levi glanced at her.
"No." Levi replied briefly, continuing to walk. Dilan frowned in confusion.
"Then why...?" She asked.
"We're getting dinner." Levi explained, stopping outside of the least noisy restaurant that was still pretty fucking noisy. But it wasn't noisy, like pub noisy. It was full of pretentious chatter and people calling for the waiter and complaining and loud, fake, obvious laughter.
Dilan saw Levi grimace and suddenly understood what was happening.
"Levi did you take me here for a date?" She asked, moving around to face him. Levi frowned, averting his eyes and Dilan couldn't get over how cute he was when he was embarrassed.
"Well yeah. I haven't exactly dated before, but I'll try it. I want to treat you right." Levi explained. Dilan smiled widely at that, her heart warming. It was clear that restaurant was the last place Levi wanted to go into and Dilan couldn't blame him. It was too loud, too bright and too crowded. Dilan would have a hard time in there but Levi with all the mess and the people triggering his OCD would be in hell. And yet, he was willing to go through all that, just to treat her right.
"Levi, we don't need to go in there." Dilan smiled, lacing their hands. Levi frowned.
"Brat I-"
"The idea of going in there clearly makes you uncomfortable and I can't be happy if you aren't. Besides, dates don't have to be in restaurants." Dilan explained. Levi raised an eyebrow.
"No?" He asked. Dilan chuckled, rolling her eyes.
"No, stupid. The only thing important about a date, is being with someone you care about." She replied, pleased as Levi smiled. "So, instead, why don't we grab some shit to snack on, a pack of beers and go sit by that quiet river I saw a while back." She offered and Levi's smile grew wider.
"You're kind of perfect." He murmured, pulling her closer. Dilan smiled, pressing a kiss to his lips.
"So are you." She laughed as Levi rolled his eyes, grabbing his hand and walking with him back the way they came, her heart incredibly light.
LEVI'S P.O.V.
It was a while later, a little past midnight. They had managed to find a store open that sold a various selection of posh ass snacks and Dilan, the idiot, had tried to pay for her half. That was an argument that Levi won by kissing her, allowing her surprise by the public affection to stun her while Levi paid for the food. Dilan had called him an asshole but cracked a smile soon after.
They couldn't find any beers in such a posh part of the city but brought a bottle of wine that sufficed.
They walked back to the river they had passed on the way, located in a public park that was quiet at night. There were only a few streetlamps on and there wasn't a soul in sight, everyone else busy parading about the town and dining at shit places like the one Levi had almost forced himself to go into. He only assumed that's where dates happened, having no experience in the area at all.
He was glad Dilan had understood how uncomfortable going in there would have made him, but he wasn't surprised that she did. The amazing brat could read him like a book. He much preferred Dilan's idea and he was thankful she wasn't into that kind of stuff either. But Levi would have followed through with it if she was.
He would do anything to make her happy.
The next few hours were spent, laying down by the river, Levi sitting against a tree, Dilan slotted in-between his legs. They ate the expensive treats and laughed at how posh and horrible some of them were. Dilan told him that one day she was going to learn how to cook so she could make them nice food and Levi scoffed at that, telling her the day she could cook edible food was the day titan's would shoot rainbows out of their asses. Safe to say Dilan was not amused by his little joke and he got a heavy punch on the arm that made him smile.
They talked, they laughed, and they basked in each other's company. Levi hadn't been so at ease in his life. Being with her was so easy. He never wanted the moment to end.
"Levi?" Dilan asked, tracing her finger over the creases and scars of his palm.
"Hm?" Levi hummed, his eyes closed, a peaceful expression on his face.
"Do you really want kids some day?" She asked softly and Levi snapped his eyes open in surprise. Dilan chuckled, noticing his shock. "Calm down, idiot. I said some day, didn't I? It's only that you mentioned it before, and I wanted to know if you meant it." Dilan shrugged. Levi relaxed, remembering their conversation on the roof.
In truth, he did mean it. Every word. He used to be adamantly against the idea of having children but after spending time with them, seeing how much joy they bring into people's lives, he changed his mind. But it wasn't only that that changed his mind. Spending time with Dilan, who he could see himself taking those steps with, was what also shifted his opinion.
"I meant it, why you want one, brat?" Levi asked with a smile, kissing her neck. Dilan blushed hard and Levi bit back a laugh. She noticed and slapped his shoulder.
"Maybe." She huffed, crossing her arms. Levi smiled at her adorable behaviour, pulling her closer.
"Good. We'll have one then." Levi replied and Dilan's eyes widened, turning around to face him to make sure he was being serious.
"Wait-really!?" She asked in shock. Levi chuckled.
"Really. I don't mind how and we'll have to be talking distant future here, brat, but I love you and I plan on keeping you around for a long time. We may have just started dating but I've loved you long enough to know you're the one for me. With time, I'll gladly take those steps with you." Levi explained, stroking her cheek. Dilan's eyes glossed over and she cracked a wide smile, kissing him.
"You're the one for me too." She whispered after pulling back. Levi smiled, his heart warming. Dilan kissed him again before getting comfy, resting the side of her head onto his shoulder. Levi stroked her hair and she smiled, melting into him.
"By steps, do you mean like getting married?" She asked, a light blush on her cheeks. Levi smiled, amused by her cuteness. He nodded, kissing the side of her head.
"Yep. We can get a house in the country." He mused and Dilan's eyes lit up, liking the idea of that.
"And a dog?" She asked and Levi gave her a deadpan look.
"A dog is where I draw the line." He informed and Dilan laughed.
"Marriage and baby, you're all for, but you draw the line at a puppy?" She asked, incredulous. Levi shrugged.
"I won't have a filthy mutt, dirtying my house." He grimaced and Dilan laughed, rolling her eyes and leaning into him.
"Clean freak." She mumbled, closing her eyes, a happy smile on her face. Levi's heart warmed.
There was a moment of contented silence before Dilan spoke again in a tired but happy tone.
"I can't wait to take those steps with you." She admitted. Levi smiled, unable to express through words how happy hearing that made him. Instead he just kissed her hand and held her close, hoping she would understand. From the way Dilan smiled and snuggled into him, he knew she did.
DILAN'S P.O.V.
After a while longer at the river they packed up their stuff and Levi lead them to the hotel. It was a beautiful structure and Dilan had never been in such a fancy place before.
Their room was large with a bathroom to the left as soon as you stepped in. Walking through into the main room and out of the small corridor there was a table and chairs on the right, crafted with fancy polished wood and a dresser in the top right corner with a vase of beautiful blue flowers on top. On the left was a large king-sized bed with pristine white sheets and fluffy looking pillows, an oak bedside table either side. The entire back wall was glass that overlooked the woods that they had previously been resting in. It seemed to have started raining while they were checking in because water droplets were hitting the windowpane, creating a delightful white noise in the background. The floor was carpet and Dilan marvelled at how soft it was under her feet once she had taken off her shoes. She had never experienced carpet before.
Dilan turned to Levi wondering how he could afford such an amazing room. Levi smiled at her and the question vanished, suddenly unimportant as she gazed into his eyes. He was so... beautiful. Dilan lifted her hand up to stroke the side of his face, leaning up to put her lips on his.
It wasn't long before their kisses turned passionate like always.
Dilan gasped as Levi picked her up, setting her down on the table gently and locking his lips with hers. Dilan's heart pounded in her chest as she grabbed fistfuls of his shirt and pulled him closer, wrapping her legs around his waist. She wanted him as close as possible. His touch was intoxicating as always, his lips even more so. Dilan didn't want to ever let him go. She wanted to stay in the bliss for as long as possible. Annoyingly, they both needed air and Levi seemed to have slightly more will power than her as he pulled back only to place kisses on her neck that made Dilan's knees go weak.
Dilan bit her lip to muffle a moan as he kissed a sensitive spot below her ear. The man seemed to notice as he directed all his attention to that area, sucking and nipping. Dilan shuddered, wondering how he always managed to make her feel so utterly breathless just from a few touches. And with that she could take no more, grabbing his face up, she needed his lips back on hers. Levi complied, sucking gently on her lower lip before sliding his tongue over hers and Dilan moaned into his mouth. She figured it must be illegal to be this good at kissing.
This is what she'd been missing out on all those years, huh?
Dilan felt something new burning between their kisses. And that heat rose with every beat of her heart as its pace picked up. She had a need and it took a second to figure out what that need was. When she realised what she wanted she froze in disbelief and Levi noticed, pulling back immediately. He looked at her with concern and she gazed into his steel eyes which, again, were slightly more dilated than usual. She took a deep breath, focusing on his face. He was as gorgeous as the first day she met him, albeit a little more tired. He had the same eyes that could set her on fire one minute and fill her with a deep calm the next. Somehow, he was managing to do both in this moment.
Dilan allowed her mind to go blank for a moment and ignored all her reservations. Just once... she wanted to be normal. She wanted more. She wanted to be connected to the man she loved, and she was finally ready to do that. And with that determined thought, she captured his lips again, reaching for the button of his shirt.
LEVI'S P.O.V.
Levi's eyes went wide as Dilan started unbuttoning his shirt as she kissed him and he pulled back, instantly worried. Yes, perhaps things had unintentionally picked up a bit in terms of heat, but he didn't want her to feel like she owed him to go all the way or do something she was uncomfortable with. He never wanted her to feel like she needed to have sex with him just to make him happy.
This was his fault. He should have sat her down and had a conversation with her about this. He had been meaning to the past week, but the opportunity had never been present. Dilan never mentioned the talk they had when she was drunk so he could only assume she didn't remember what happened at all.
"Dil... what are you doing?" He asked, trying to get his breathing under control. It didn't help that he was painfully aroused right now. In his defence, she was too gorgeous. Dilan blushed and averted her eyes. Levi tried hard to ignore how adorable she was being.
"Oh... I um... I thought..." She cringed, embarrassed. Levi sighed and laced his fingers with hers, placing a soft kiss on her lips to reassure her and her eyes met his again.
"Dilan, we don't need to do that. You don't ever have to force yourself into something that makes you uncomfortable. Not for me. I love you, okay? I'll be happy as long as I have you. You don't owe me anything and I mean that long term. Don't put pressure on yourself to be ready or try to be ready. I love you for you, not the possibility that one day I might have your body. Understand?" He said seriously, needing her to get it.
Dilan looked at him in slight shock before her eyes glossed over slightly and Levi was worried, he'd made her upset for a moment before she cracked a wide smile and kissed him gratefully. Levi let out a mental breath of relief, thankful his words had gotten through. Hopefully she would feel more at ease when things got heated from now on knowing Levi didn't expect her to take it any further on his behalf.
Dilan pulled back and leant her forehead against his, stroking his cheek gently.
"I love you too, Levi." She whispered, slightly breathless and Levi smiled, his whole chest erupting in warmth no matter how many times she had said it to him. It still felt as good as the first time. "Which is why I want to try it." She continued and Levi sighed.
Clearly, he was wrong. He hadn't gotten through to her.
"No, brat, you don't understand. I don't need-"
"I know dumbass." She cut him off with a fond smile, rolling her eyes slightly. "I know you don't need or expect anything, and I love you for that, but I want this. I trust you; I trust you more than anyone in the world and if you tell me right now that it's worth it, that it's meant to feel good... then I'll believe you." Dilan explained, looking into his eyes with determination. Levi could still see fear there, but it wasn't overwhelming dread. She was really trusting him.
Levi looked at her carefully, figuring out how to reply. He wanted to answer for her. He wanted to make sure his answer was in her own best interests, making sure not to let the fact that his heart was still pounding in his chest at their close proximity be any kind of a factor. She was asking if sex was supposed to feel good? Yes, he knew it was and he was certain he could make her feel good. But was it worth it? Was it worth the experience potentially bringing up bad memories for her? Levi never wanted her to associate him with that pain from her past.
Dilan seemed to notice he was struggling. She smiled at him lovingly.
"I trust you." She repeated, kissing him gently. Levi kissed her back, trying express how much love he had for her. Dilan smiled into it, smoothing her hand up his undercut. Levi pulled away, looking into her burning eyes once more for confirmation.
"You're sure?" Levi asked carefully. Dilan smiled and nodded, kissing him again. Levi picked her up, continuing to kiss her as he laid her down on the bed carefully. He hovered over her and took in her features. Her eyes were slightly darker from lust, and her cheeks were flushed, her lips somewhat swollen from their intense kisses. Levi was convinced she was the most beautiful person he had ever seen. "We can stop whenever you want. Just say the word, it doesn't matter when. I won't be mad." He assured. Dilan smiled and nodded in understanding, looking a lot more relieved.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought her back down, so his lips met hers. Levi supported himself with his arms, not wanting to crush her. He could sense her hesitancy in the kiss. She may be ready, and she may trust him, but she was still scared. That was okay and Levi didn't intend on rushing this. Which is why when her slightly shaky hand reached for his shirt buttons again, Levi took it in his own, smoothing his thumb over her knuckle as he continued to kiss her deeply. Dilan seemed confused but didn't protest.
In fact, Levi was pretty sure some of the tension seeped out of her muscles knowing they were going to take this slow.
He broke away from her lips to give her air and she breathed heavily as he kissed along her jawline and down her neck, licking and nipping every so often and enjoying the little squirms and gasps she made in response. He licked around the shell of her ear and sucked on her earlobe and Dilan let out a quiet moan, arching her back a little. Levi smirked against her skin, making a mental note that she was sensitive there. Dilan seemed to sense his smugness since she sent him a half-assed glare, attempting to hide her red face with her hands. Levi chuckled softly and pulled them away, kissing her forehead and both of her cheeks. Dilan seemed to blush even more, but she did crack a small smile and averted her eyes. Levi smiled, finding her behaviour incredibly cute but he didn't mention it, instead locking his lips with hers once again.
He went at her pace, knowing this was the only way to do it. After some time later when Dilan tugged at his shirt for the second time, only then did he comply, sensing no hesitation and no fear. She wanted his shirt off this time so that's what she would get.
He was going to give her everything she wanted tonight.
Levi sat up a bit to unbutton the top part of his shirt before pulling the material over his head. He took a breath, trying to calm himself down before looking at Dilan again. He smirked when he saw she was gawking at him. Or more accurately his chest. Before he could do anything else, Dilan sat up a bit too, smoothing her hands over his shoulder blades and Levi let out a breath at her touch as her hands travelled down his chest slowly. He shivered, locking eyes with her amber ones, he checked she was still okay, and she seemed to be pleased, too distracted by his muscles to think about what was coming next.
Levi watched, mesmerised, as she kissed his neck before moving downwards, pressing soft kisses over every one of his firm muscles. Levi swallowed hard, his eyes fluttering closed. He wasn't expecting this kind of initiative from her, but he certainly wasn't complaining. Her touch was like a drug. It was addictive.
Her lips moved back up until they locked with his again and Levi kissed her slowly, knocking the air out of her. It was only a few moments later, when things started getting more heated and breathier that Dilan broke apart to pull her shirt over her head. Levi cupped her cheek, smoothing his thumb over her cheekbone and making sure she was mentally prepared for what she just did, pleased as there was no reservation in her eyes. And with that Levi allowed himself to look at her.
She was... beautiful and Levi couldn't stop himself from smoothing his hands over her waist, stroking his thumbs up her ribs.
Dilan shivered, melting into his touch.
Levi pressed a kiss to her bare shoulder, fully intending on giving the new areas of skin the attention they deserved, but Dilan surprised him by unclipping her bra and allowing the material to collect on the floor with the rest. Before Levi could analyse her mental state, she kissed him eagerly and Levi figured that was clarity enough. He carefully lowered her back down, continuing to kiss her while he did. After a moment Levi broke away, kissing downwards. He heard Dilan's breath hitch in her throat as Levi kissed the curve of her breast, grazing his teeth slightly, he smirked as goose bumps appeared on her skin and her hands automatically flew up to grip his hair as she let out a soft gasp.
He trailed his tongue down, over her soft skin, between her cleavage and her ribs, kissing along the base of her stomach and enjoying the gasps he was enlisting from the gorgeous woman beneath him. Dilan was panting and Levi waited until she least expected it, having avoided that area all together so far before taking her nipple into his mouth and Dilan couldn't muffle the moan that escaped her mouth as her back arched off the bed. Levi felt pride at her reaction, continuing to make her gasp as he added attention to the neglected bud.
Dilan sighed softly, her face relaxed in pure bliss and Levi was happy the attention was pleasing her.
Eventually Levi stopped the focus on her breasts and returned back to her neck, not without earning himself a small whine of annoyance from Dilan. Levi chuckled softly, licking a long stripe along her jaw line and sucking on her neck's sensitive spot once more, making her shiver again. Dilan's fingers went to his belt and Levi helped her, undoing the button and shrugging the trousers off his legs. He left his boxers on, not wanting to scare her with how hard he was right now. He didn't want her to think about that next bit until he was sure she was ready.
Right now, he just wanted her to enjoy the attention.
Dilan went for her own trousers and Levi was concerned for a moment but didn't stop her. She gave him a look to help and he did, pulling down her zipper and hooking his fingers in the waistband, ready to pull down when Dilan put a hand over his, stopping him. Levi's stomach dropped slightly and he looked up, worried she was freaking out. He breathed out when he saw her face. It wasn't scared.
She almost looked... embarrassed.
Levi moved back up to her face, stroking her cheek gently.
"What's wrong?" He whispered, placing a gentle kiss on her temple. Dilan seemed to relax slightly at the affection but still refused to meet his eyes.
She bit her lip.
"You've... never really seen the scars on my legs." She confessed quietly, almost shame in her tone. Levi's eyes softened and he stroked some hair behind her ear, kissing her gently before pulling back to look her in the eye.
"You're perfect." He assured, meaning it. He wouldn't change a single thing about her. Dilan blushed and smiled a bit. Levi smiled back and kissed her again while he dipped his fingers into her waist band again, seeing how she'd react. This time, Dilan didn't stop him, in fact, she arched her hips to help him get the piece of clothing down and he had to pull back to get it off the end of her legs, dropping it on the floor.
They were 1 item of clothing away from being completely exposed in front of each other.
Levi looked at her legs, instantly noticing the abused flesh of her thighs. The scars were dark, having had plenty of time to heal over, and ran down the inside of her leg on either side. He ghosted his fingers over her tanned marked flesh and felt Dilan tense, but he paid no attention, leaning down, he proceeded to place a kiss on every single mark, worshiping her skin with his lips. Dilan was panting as he worked his way up, being painfully slow, he covered every inch of her skin, moving to her arms, covering the scars their too. He reclaimed her breasts once again and Dilan didn't bother to contain her moans before he reached back up to her lips in a long overdue kiss.
Dilan kissed him back passionately, clearly wanting to return some of the effort he was giving to her. While the thought made him smile, he wasn't bothered about himself. Tonight, was all about her.
"You're beautiful." Levi breathed, not being able to help the words slipping from his mouth. Dilan smiled at him, cupping his cheeks.
"So are you." She replied, equally breathless. Levi chuckled, kissing her again.
DILAN'S P.O.V.
Dilan almost couldn't take it at this point. He was being so gentle, so slow, giving her so much attention and time, making sure that she was ready that her heart felt like it was going to burst any second. She wasn't sure if it would be possible to love this man more. He was everything that she wanted, everything that she needed. His touch was electric and yet soothing. As the seconds ticked by, she forgot her nerves all together. She had never felt so hot, the sweat was literally dripping down her forehead. But she also felt different down there. Almost wet? What was with that?
Dilan broke back from the kiss to sit up a bit, checking her pants with a curious expression. Was she bleeding? She ignored the raised eyebrow from Levi and checked, frowning at the clear sticky liquid.
"The fuck is this?" She mumbled. This was new.
She heard a chuckle and looked to Levi as he smiled, kissing down the side of her head.
"Women make that when their aroused. Helps make it hurt less." He explained briefly. Dilan blinked.
"Oh... that's never happened before." She muttered under her breath, a lump forming in her throat.
"Hey... look at me." Levi encouraged gently. Dilan did so, feeling the lump vanish immediately as her amber eyes met his loving grey. "Don't think about before. Stay here with me." He whispered and Dilan cracked a smile, nodding happily. Levi smiled back, placing his lips back on hers as they sunk into the mattress. Dilan ran her fingers through his hair, so completely in love with this man.
In that loving moment, she almost felt ready.
Deciding to go with it, letting her train of thought sweep her up, she hooked her fingers in Levi's boxers and tugged gently, telling him what she wanted.
Levi pulled back from the kiss to look her in the eye.
"You sure?" He asked, breathing as heavily as she was. Dilan could see in how dilated his eyes were that he was getting desperate. And yet Dilan knew if she wanted to stop right now, he would with no questions asked. That's how much she trusted him because that's how amazing he was. And yet, her arousal was reaching an all-time high too. She was starting to need more. It was scary but also exciting in a way. She nodded firmly and Levi hesitated, but Dilan kissed him before he could say anything else, pulling down the material and Levi seemed to accept her answer as he was quick to kick his underwear off before helping her with hers. Dilan lifted her hips to help and soon they were completely bare in front of each other.
Dilan's heart was pounding but she almost kind of liked how vulnerable they were. She would only trust Levi to be near her in this state. And the fact that he was still kissing her was definitely helping her nerves.
Until he broke the kiss for air and Dilan looked down, her whole body tensing up in dread as she remembered what came next and she felt her blood run cold. Levi noticed immediately and gripped her chin, forcing her eyes up to meet his.
"Listen to me, okay brat?" He soothed and Dilan felt herself calm, if only a little. "Take a deep breath and focus on my voice." He continued, leaning their foreheads together. Dilan hesitated but closed her eyes and did as she was told. She took a deep and let it out. Levi stroked her cheek in approval. "Good. Take another." He instructed softly. Dilan did so again but found her breaths were starting to get quicker and her body started to shake without her permission. Levi gave her a reassuring smile. "We'll stop for today. We can always try another time if you feel ready." Levi comforted and Dilan took another unsteady breath, shaking her head.
"N-no, I'm fine." She tried. She could see he needed this, and the truth was she felt like she did to. Her body was ready, it was just her mind holding her back. Levi's eyes softened and he stroked her hair affectionately. Dilan found it calmed her down.
"Dilan, you're trembling." He reminded, softly. Dilan swallowed.
"I know." She replied, hoping the look in her eyes would tell him just how much she wanted to go on. How much she wanted to work through the fear. It's not like she was scared of him. It was more that she was scared of the trauma. What it would do to her.
Levi hesitated before speaking up.
"Talk to me then. What exactly is scaring you?" He asked genuinely. Dilan blinked, not expecting that. What was scaring her? Was it the idea of pain? No, not really. She could handle pain. She thought back to her previous experiences, tensing up slightly in thought but Levi took her hand, squeezing it gently and it helped her relax.
"I guess... the idea of not being in control is what scares me the most. Being trapped, being used." She admitted shakily, a rogue tear falling down her cheek. Levi wiped it away gently.
"Well you know I would never use you. You know I love you. You know, you're safe." Levi comforted and Dilan breathed out subconsciously. Of course, she knew all these things, but it did help for him to say it. "As for the control... do you want to try something?" Levi asked. "If you really don't want to stop." He added with a stern look. Dilan nodded.
She really didn't.
"What?" She asked. Levi sat up a bit and lied down on his back before pulling her onto him, their positions now flipped, so Levi was lying on his back and Dilan was sitting on top of him. Her eyes widened in surprise and she steadied her hands on his shoulders to keep from falling.
"Honestly, I've never done this before..." Levi admitted, a small blush on his cheeks. "But being on top does offer that level of control. I'll still guide you, but you'll have the control. Do you think it would help?" Levi asked, lacing his hands with hers. Dilan looked at him, her heart-warming at the thought behind the gesture. It was obvious which position he preferred but he was putting his own comfort aside on the hopes it would make her feel better. To his credit, this position felt a lot less suffocating. Don't get her wrong, she loved Levi on top of her but for now, at least until she got used to it and rewired her brain, being the one in control, the one with the power to stop at any time even if she knew Levi would do whatever she asked, helped a lot. It was the extra little push she needed and the amazing man beneath her knew that.
She was nervous but he still said he would guide her. She trusted him to help her.
"Yes, I think so." She smiled, breathing out in relief, she noticed she wasn't shaking as much anymore. Levi smiled in approval.
"Good." He replied, kissing the palm of her hand. Dilan's heart fluttered at the simple action and it gave her the push to continue. She sat up, kneeling so she was hovering over him rather than seating on top of him. Dilan looked at him for help, not exactly sure where to go from here. Levi smiled in reassurance, squeezing her hands for support and she let out an unconscious breath, feeling a lot better. His hands left hers and slid onto her hips, gently moving her until she was at the right angle. All she needed to do was move down.
Dilan swallowed hard, taking a breath. The crazy part of her brain was telling her this was insane. It was screaming at her, asking her why she was allowing herself to be put in such a position again. A position that had brought her nothing but pain and years of emotional torment. But looking at the face of the man she loved, looking at how much affection was in his eyes, the rational part of her brain told her she was safe, and that Levi would never hurt her. And that was the side that reigned supreme.
With that comforting thought, feeling like she had beaten her fear for the moment, Dilan lowered herself down, with the help of Levi's hands on her hips. She bit her lip to muffle a whimper as pain erupted but she kept moving down slowly until she was sitting down on him again and Levi was fully sheathed inside her.
Dilan was breathing shakily, trying hard not to let it get to her. While it was manageable and a lot less painful than before considering she was actually aroused this time, it was still enough to bring back some horrible feelings and she had to blink back the tears.
LEVI'S P.O.V.
Levi had to use every ounce of willpower not to moan out loud when Dilan sunk onto him. She was so tight and hot, and he found himself fighting hard against the cardinal impulse to buck his hips and bury himself further into that amazing heat. In the moment, he knew he had never felt anyone as amazing, but it knew that was probably added to the fact of how much he loved her. There had never been any feelings before. It was just fucking to release stress.
This was something different and he found himself enjoying it a lot more.
Levi let out a shaky breath, wiping away some sweat that had collected on his forehead. Staying so still was testing every ounce of his self-control and he found himself swallowing down the urge to move every five seconds. Taking another breath, he opened his eyes again after having had to close them at the intensity of the feeling. He observed the woman he loved. Her head was down so he couldn't see her facial expression, but he didn't need to really. It was obvious how uncomfortable and in pain she was from her body language alone. It was very clear they were not having the same experiences right now.
That was normal at this point, she needed to get used to his size, which he'll admit was bigger than average, so he wasn't surprised she was uncomfortable. Only when she was used to him could he start moving. He wanted to get to that part soon so he could make her feel good, but the likeliness was they were nowhere near, especially when she was so tensed up like that.
Levi took her hand and squeezed it gently. Dilan bit her lip and looked up at him. Levi's heart hurt at the tears swimming in her eyes and he gave her a comforting smile, kissing her hand again. He tugged on her hand gently, an unspoken request for her to get closer and she did, laying down on top of him to hide her face in his shoulder.
Levi could feel her body's small tremors and her shaky pants on his skin.
"You're doing so well, brat. I'm proud of you okay?" Levi comforted gently, running his hand through her long black hair and pressing soft kisses to her neck. Dilan let go of a bit of tension but was still shaking. Levi wasn't sure if she was scared or in pain anymore and decided he needed to reassure her. "I'm not going to move until you're ready and you're going to do the same. There's no time limit, okay? We'll wait as long as you want." He assured, feeling Dilan melt into him further as he stroked his hand up and down her spine. Her shaking reduced at the comforting words. "Relax, okay baby?" He mumbled against her skin and Dilan let out a breath, managing a small nod, she started to control her breathing.
Levi smiled in approval and kissed her neck gently, not going for anything to make her squirm quite yet. He simply wanted to sooth and reassure her that nothing was going to happen until she was ready.
He forgot about his needs almost all together in favouring hers.
A bit of time went by in silence, the only noise being their soft pants as they laid there together. Levi continued to shower her with affection, and he felt her relax more with every second. All was going well, and they were on the right track until a loud crash from outside in the far distance that sounded like a tree falling over due to the storm had Dilan flinching and then wincing as she accidently moved on him. She had tensed up subconsciously which is why it hurt as much as it did, but Dilan didn't seem to understand that, and her breathing grew laboured again.
They were right back to square one.
Levi decided to try something new. If he could make her feel some good maybe she would forget about the bad.
"Can I try something?" Levi asked softly, continuing to litter her skin with gentle kisses. Dilan let out a shaky breath and hesitated before replying.
"W-what?" She whispered.
"Something that will make you feel good." He replied simply and Dilan seemed reluctant. "I'm still not moving, I promise brat." He reassured and Dilan relaxed a bit. "Trust me?" He asked, kissing along her jawline. There wasn't even a second of hesitation before she replied.
"Okay." She whispered. Levi smiled, his heart warming at how much faith she had in him.
Stroking her back gently, Levi smoothed his hand down and underneath, moving Dilan up slightly so she could give him the space he needed without having to change her position which she seemed to be quite comfortable in. Levi didn't want to take any comfort away from her right now.
His hand brushed down her lower stomach and was about to go lower when Dilan tensed.
"W-what are you doing?" She asked in slight surprise. Levi kissed her neck before biting down lightly on her earlobe and Dilan gasped, putty under his touch.
"Trust me." He whispered again and Dilan didn't protest as he continued to kiss her neck while snaking his hand downwards, locating the neglected bud with ease and adding just the right amount of pressure.
Dilan whimpered at the unexpected pleasure, arching her back involuntarily and it was obvious to Levi she had never been touched like this before.
"Shit." She hissed, grabbing onto his firm shoulders as some kind of tether, burying her face in his shoulder to muffle the moans. Levi smiled as he continued his ministrations, touching her in just the right way. Adding just enough pressure to make her see stars.
"Feel good?" He asked with a smug smile, nipping at her ear. Dilan gasped again and Levi continued to add to his mental notes that her ear was really fucking sensitive. No complaints on his behalf, he loved to make her squirm. He licked around the shell and she shuddered.
"Ass... y-you're loving this aren't you..." Dilan panted out, digging her nails into his back as he touched her in just the right way and Levi swallowed hard, supressing a moan of his own. Dilan didn't seem to notice, and again, this night was not about him. They could discover each other's body's another time given Dilan wanted to do this again.
He refocused on her question and chuckled, her arched back giving him just enough room to take his other hand and cupped one of her breasts, smoothing his thumb and rolling the stiff peak. Dilan cried out his name in a way that made Levi's brain go foggy with arousal. He was panting as fast as her, the pressure was starting to be too much to handle, especially with all her squirming. It was the most fantastic torture he had ever felt but he was starting to need more. From the gasping in the woman on top of him, perhaps she felt the same.
His theories were only proved as Dilan gave an experimental roll of the hips and they both moaned at the feeling.
"L-Levi." She breathed, wanting help.
Levi nodded, moving her head slightly and brushing some sweaty hair behind her ear to kiss her before sitting her up again. Dilan was shaking again but it wasn't from fear. She needed release and he did too.
Still, he made a promise to go slow and he wasn't going to break that.
Levi placed his hands on her hips, gently rubbing the soft skin in soothing circles while he looked up into her fiery eyes one last time, making sure she wanted this. Dilan nodded, reading his thoughts and with that last bit of encouragement Levi gently moved her on him while rolling his hips and they both gasped, the long wait filling them both with so much relief and pleasure it was barely imaginable.
It had never felt this good before.
Levi kept going, keeping the pace slow. Thanks to his position, it was harder to get the right angle but from the euphoric expression on Dilan's face and the way her nails were digging into his shoulders he assumed he was doing something right for her. And her response was only making it better for Levi.
He groaned softly, angling his hips just right and Dilan cried out.
Levi smirked, knowing he'd found a very sensitive spot and continued to thrust in that direction, making Dilan moan without filter as Levi continued his agonisingly slow pace. He knew he needed more but he wouldn't go faster until Dilan made the first move, like everything else.
When Dilan started moving her hips in time with his and locking her orange lust-filled eyes with his, he knew she was ready.
In one smooth motion, Levi had sat up with her on his lap. He wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled her hips to his, burying himself deep inside her.
"Levi! Shit." Dilan gasped, grabbing onto him and wrapping her arms around his neck to bury her face in the crook of his neck. Levi continued to rock them back and forth, picking up the pace and continuing to hit a spot deep within her that was making her see stars. Dilan was a mess, moaning and cursing into his neck. Levi couldn't judge her because he was the same. At a particularly deep thrust he had to bite into her shoulder to keep from moaning too load and Dilan practically screamed his name.
Levi could tell she was close. He was too.
DILAN'S P.O.V.
Dilan couldn't handle it anymore. The pleasure was so intense she could hardly breathe, and she was convinced her heart was about to tunnel out of her chest at any given moment. She had no idea it was possible to feel this good. Levi was hitting just the right place, kissing her in just the right spots and his breathy pants and small moans were setting her on fire. She had never heard him sound so amazing in her life. She was shaking from how good it felt and part of her never wanted it to end but the rest of her felt the need for release so strongly that she might just explode if she didn't get it soon.
The man below her seemed to notice.
Levi took one hand off of her hips to once again find her sensitive bud, bringing her closer and closer to the edge and Dilan gasped, never having felt anything so intense in her life. She was jelly under his touch and she found she couldn't think coherent thoughts anymore, choking on moan after moan, tears spilled from her eyes and slid down Levi's bare back.
He didn't stop but pulled her face back to look at her, clearly worried. His face filled with relief as he saw she wasn't scared or freaking out, simply overwhelmed by the intensity of it all. Levi lent their foreheads together and Dilan gazed into his eyes with much effort as she got closer and closer to her peak. Dilan was so close she almost couldn't bear it as Levi claimed her lips in a final deep kiss as they both reached their climaxes, gripping onto each other tightly and moaning into the others mouth. Dilan's mind went completely blank, unable to think of anything other than the pleasure. No pain, no fear, no worries, no grief, no human eating monsters. In this shared moment all that existed in the world was her and Levi.
Together.
Levi rocked them a few more times slowly to draw out their orgasms before stilling his movements and breaking the kiss to give them both air and time to catch their breaths.
Dilan was breathing shakily, clinging onto him with everything she had, she couldn't help the tears that continued to drip off her chin and slide down his skin. Levi held her close, stroking her hair, pressing more loving kisses to her neck and Dilan had to bite her lip to muffle a sob, completely overwhelmed with how much love he was showing her in her dazed state. She felt a tear slide down her own shoulder and she realised Levi might be similarly overwhelmed.
She took a few breaths to calm herself down, lifting her hand to run her fingers through his hair in a loving and comforting gesture. Levi hugged her tighter and took a few more moments to compose himself before pulling back to look her in the eye. Dilan smiled at him, wiping the tears away from his eyes and Levi did the same to her, cracking a smile of his own.
She pressed her lips to his in a slow, gentle kiss while they held each other, enjoying the thrum of their bodies as they continued to come down from their highs. Levi hesitated before breaking the kiss. He gently twisted her over, so she was laying with her back to the mattress and kissed her while he pulled out. Dilan shivered slightly, weirdly preferring his warmth to be there now. Levi laid down on the pillow beside her, pulling her onto his chest and Dilan slid her leg over his, draping a loose arm around his waist and snuggling into him, sighing softly in content. Levi pulled the covers over them and kissed the side of her head, holding her close.
"I love you, Levi. I love you so freaking much." Dilan mumbled tiredly and Levi chuckled warmly.
"I love you too." He said against her temple and Dilan smiled, another tear spilling down her face. She knew as long as she had this amazing man with her, everything would be okay.
And with that comforting thought she closed her eyes and allowed the amazing exhaustion to take her, never having felt safer than right now in her loved one's arms.
A/N: Guyyyyyyysssssssss! Are we so proud of her? Fearless woman right there.
This has been one of the big building points in the story in terms of character development for Dil and I absolutely wanted to make it perfect.
Maybe some of you weren't expecting sex this soon but I had a couple reasons for this. Soon the story will be moving fast and I wanted their first time together to just be loving and happy with no cloud of sadness from the squads deaths looming over them. This time right now is their time to connect as a couple and be with each other. Also I wanted them to be comfortable naked in front of each other as after the expedition I want them to help each other and them having boundaries about how exposed they are with each other would limit the scene I want to write. Not that I plan on them doing it the day the squad die or anything but you'll see what I mean.
Levi was the perfect gentleman of course. Damn, I know I'm the writer but he's so perfect, lol. Giving her so many opportunities to back out was probably what gave Dilan the strength to keep going. She knew, despite the dark thoughts and the bad memories that tried to weigh her down, that she was safe and loved and Levi wouldn't hurt her.
I'd say it was pretty mellow smut as smut goes but what'd you think? Let me know the kind of stuff you would want in the future. I think as Dilan builds confidence they'll be able to experiment with new stuff but in terms of the style of writing was it just the right amount of detail? Not graphic enough? Too graphic?
Let me know cause I'd love to hear your thoughts. Constructive criticism is always appreciated :)
I know them having sex was the main point of this chapter but did we like the scene with Eld and the Dilvi talk by the river? Them talking about kids literally makes me so excited. Will they have children, you ask? Well... that would be a spoiler, wouldn't it ;)
Thanks for all the comments everyone. I hope you don't mind that the chapters have slowed down a bit but I'm really quite busy with exam prep at the moment so I hope you don't mind if the pace of uploading stays about the same for now?
I love you guys! Thanks for reading and stay safe! X