Just because I was in the mood for it: Something short to enjoy your Sunday with :-)

Chapter Title "Infinity" by The XX

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the Chicago PD, Fire or Med characters, only my OCs!

Hailey had thought about just not talking to Jay and leave him a message instead, maybe even when she was already gone, but then she hadn't had the heart to do it like that. The last thing she wanted to risk was him hating her, if she left without a word. Hailey needed at least one person on her side. She needed someone to tell her it would be alright, that she hadn't ruined it all, that he understood why she had done what she did and that Voight had had no right to talk to her like that and take so drastic measures. Send her away? It was absolutely impossible to wrap her head around that alone. There was only one person that could give her the strength and power to go home, pack her things and board that fateful plane tomorrow morning. One person who could make her thoughts stop racing and ground her.
Right now everything was just a mess. And in that whole mess one thought had embedded itself deep in her heart: She really needed to see and talk to Jay! See and take in his familiar face one last time.

Only instead of his face, another one greeted her when she arrived at the location her phone had directed her to. A very fresh, very animated and beautiful face. One that she should have expected to be here and yet momentarily threw her for a loop.

It belonged to a woman who would put a smile on Jay's face during a stake-out just because she texted him to bring back lots of ice-cream when he got the chance and had the nerve to hit a 24-hour supermarket on his way home. A woman who had taken over some of what Hailey once had considered to be her responsibility concerning the care and mental hygiene for her friend and partner.
That woman now reigned in her very obvious surprise to see her here this late in the evening pretty quickly:

"Oh hey… We thought you were the pizza guy!"

Taking in her radiance Hailey started to wonder if her move to come here had been the right one.
Rianne was positively glowing even with paint splatters all over her face and dirt on her clothes, like someone from a couple-friendly D-I-Y advertisement, glossy edition. That ridiculously large hoodie sweater over clay stained leggings, all that messy hair held up by a signature headband: even Hailey had to admit she could pull that look off. How could Jay not be in love with her?

"Im sorry, to barge in here like this, but I need to talk to Jay. I know he's here, I pinged his phone."

Hailey instantly regretted for it to come out so harshly and like a demand, but it was the only way she knew she could handle this at the moment and not break down crying on the spot. She really must not cry under any circumstances!
Big azure eyes stared back at her so knowingly that Hailey felt pretty naked under her scrutiny.

"Hailey I'm starting to wonder if you can do it!"

Certainly she should not think about all the awful things Voight had shouted or rather spat out, his face only inches from hers. It had taken her every resolve not to flinch back or else, like punch him in the face for example, because she had felt so threatened. Especially she had felt extremely small and Hailey didn't like that at all. It reminded her of times she rather wanted to keep buried.

"Yeah, sure! Jay's here, come on in," Rianne's trademark lilt brought her back to reality and she followed her inside, where it was thankfully much warmer.

Jay had told her they were still fixing up the place, so she hadn't known what to expect.
Passing Jay's vintage motorcycle in the middle of the entrance hall, she was led up a steep straight staircase to the first half floor. From afar Hailey could hear Jay's voice chuckle flirtatiously:

"I see you're empty handed, so you're gonna have to think about something good to keep me distracted babe, I'm starving. And we of course have no glasses for the wine so I'll guess we'll be drinking from the bot…"

They had reached the top step by now and Rianne moved aside to reveal that they had unexpected company. Jay froze for a second with a flustered "Oh," on his lips. He looked so different in this environment, very different from how she was used to seeing him. His hands were also covered in remnants of what Hailey guessed was paint and putty and he was wearing an old flannel shirt of his that was a little worn out and frayed at the seams, his light blue jeans had actual holes in them. She didn't know he owned anything else than dark blue, grey and black jeans, maybe some cargo-pants. It wouldn't have surprised her if he'd been barefoot, as it would have matched the comfortableness he gave out, but his shoes were actually the same ones he had worn all day. Meeting his eyes and taking in the tousled state of his normally so well-groomed hair she imagined a slight blush creeping into his cheeks. Oh well this was certainly awkward.

Hailey quickly took in the room and noticed a blanket spread out on the floor as there was no real furniture in the room yet, its ceiling reaching two-stories high, candles lit on a silver platter next to it. Soft music came from a bluetooth-box placed on a single leather armchair next to an industrial door leading out to a courtyard. Obviously she had walked in on something that was supposed to be an impromptu romantic dinner or even some kind of celebration. Shit! Hailey really had no idea about her partner's love life and this was maybe a little more than she had wanted to know about it, because it suddenly felt way too intimate.

Quickly changing her line of vision Hailey couldn't help but admire the spacious surroundings. Even with the certain rustic feel of the former warehouse structure, this place was on the verge of being transitioned into something very homey and certainly unique. It was completely different from anything she would have ever pictured Jay in, but he oddly fit in here. Hailey couldn't help but keep thinking that it was actually pretty apposite: His life was extending!

"Yeah, well: We're living in a warehouse now…" Jay commented on Hailey's inspection.

He said it with an eye-roll in his voice but she could tell he loved it. What the hell was she doing here?

"I'm sure it's gonna look great once it's finished…" she managed to get out, fiddling nervously with her jacket seam, not meeting Jay's eyes.

The doorbell went for the second time. A so sudden loud sound it made her flinch a little.

"Wild guess: This should finally be pizza!"

Rianne snapped back into action next to her and excused herself to go open the door, seeming eager to escape the uncomfortable silence, while Jay kept staring at Hailey in a confused way.
She could tell he knew this was not just a friendly visit to see his new place. They didn't do these anymore, at least not as naturally as it used to be. Jay knew her. He could tell by the look on her face that something wasn't right. Even if she had been better at hiding it.
How would she survive without a partner who knew he like he did know her?
Again she felt tears stinging behind her eyes that she vehemently tried to gulp down.

"Hailey …," Jay stumbled over his words and made a step towards her, but then Rianne was already back with the food.

"D'you want in on pizza?" She asked balancing two large boxes, setting them down on a nearby pasting table and opening the lids.

Suddenly all Hailey's courage and determination vaned:

"No, ugh, look, I'm sorry. This was a bad idea! I just wanted to have quick chat with Jay, but you're obviously busy, so… I'm just gonna go! It's actually not that important…"

It was everything but not important, but Hailey already had one foot turned back to the stairs, when Rianne interrupted her:

"Really it's not a problem! And if you wanna talk to Jay alone, I'm just gonna go and be upstairs. I actually wanted to call Matt anyway, see how Sylvie's doing?"

The last part was directed at Jay, who just nodded in empathy, obviously knowing what she was talking about.
Before anyone could argue with her Rianne had ripped off a piece of cardboard and put one slice out of each box on it to take them to go. She turned to walk towards a staircase leading to a second floor gallery, letting her hand run along Jay's lower arm in passing, shortly squeezed his hand and gave Hailey an encouraging smile. And it didn't even seem fake.

That woman wasn't stupid. On the contrary: perceptive enough to pick up on the vibes Hailey was giving out that the thing she had to discuss was a private matter between her and her partner. In that moment she almost hated Rianne for being so nice and liberal to take herself out of the occasion without anyone asking her to. Why couldn't she be terrible?
The expression Jay momentarily wore when his eyes followed his girlfriend was nothing short of adoring and soft.

Would this be it by the way? Her visiting him or more accurately them in a perfect, family friendly home? Never really able to be alone with Jay other than at work or when out for a drink? A drink he would cut short when he needed to go home to be with his girl? And at work? Well, that certainty was at risk now too wasn't it? Who knew what her New York assignment would bring, who knew what would be when she returned to Chicago. When and if that would be. The fact that she was about to leave him behind sank in even more so and that she absolutely didn't know how to do it as well.

But she was happy for him! She just had to be happy if Jay was happy and he really seemed to be just that, didn't he? So she was leaving him in very capable hands. And maybe her new assignment was a chance at moving on and letting go of things that had long since changed anyway. But then why did this all hurt so bad?

"What's up Hailey? You don't look so good and you're freaking me out actually," Rianne heard Jay address Hailey when she was already headed upstairs, his voice laced with deep concern.

His partner coming here without announcing herself in advance was a little odd, so there must be something serious going on.
She didn't want to be the prying nosy girlfriend, so she had given them some privacy, but suddenly she heard a very distraught sob followed by:

"I really screwed up Jay!"

Not able to control her natural curiosity Rianne peeked down from the gallery one last time and saw that Jay had put his arm around Hailey's shoulders as if to comfort her. The gesture made her heart pump a little faster. Was Hailey actually crying? What the hell could she have done?
Breathing through that splinter of jealousy and confusion Rianne tried to keep her head and heart in check, just do like she had said and concentrate on getting Matt on the line, while munching her pizza slices in solitude between paint buckets and a lonely foot lamp.

Thankfully he picked up so that she was distracted for a minute or two other than worry about what Hailey had possibly to tell Jay and how it would affect him.
The matter to discuss with Casey wasn't really uplifting as well. Unfortunately Sylvie Brett's biological mother, whom she had just started to get to know and have a relationship with, had died giving birth to Sylvie's half-sister that weekend. Obviously a very traumatic incident that had left their friend utterly devastated and made Rianne think about the fact that she hadn't once since coming back from Argentina inquired about her step-mother's health and wellbeing during her advancing pregnancy. Perhaps she should get a little bit more invested even if she still had mixed feelings about it.

After ending the call it didn't take very long until she heard Jay call out for her and climb up the stairs. She met him halfway.
All the earlier banter and lightness had been wiped away from his features, when he took her by the shoulders and spoke in a low and troubled tone:

"Hey so… turns out Hailey has to leave for New York tomorrow…"

The way he said New York told her that nothing about that sat right with him and she had a few ideas as to why. At the moment said person about to leave still awkwardly hovered downstairs as far as Rianne could see.

"Oh, did she piss off Voight?"

It was just something that spontaneously sprang to her mind and Jay's surprised expression told her she wasn't really so far off with that theory:

"What makes you say that?"

"Isn't it the truth?"

But he shook his head, smiling ever so softly when he answered:

"You know I can't talk to you about that…"

"So, that's all I need to know then. I guess you wanna grab a 'farewell drink' with her?"

Not that she was happy about this, but she knew that if Hailey was willing to give him a proper goodbye, he had to take it. Make sure that she was good, that her and him parted ways on good terms. And Jay generally could never deny a friend in need the care he or she asked for. With him they didn't even need to ask, they just got it.

"Yeah…, she'll only be gone temporarily, but…" he looked guilty when confirming her suspicions, so she hurried to keep her tone light:

"Right, so you two go and I'll finish up here.…"

"I know this is terrible timing…" he was reaching for her face as if to apologize in advance.

"It's fine Jay, I completely understand!"

"I really don't deserve you…"

He really was killing her one day with his considerate- and humbleness.

"Yes, you do! So now go before I'll change my mind," Rianne winked and leaned up to him to kiss his cheek, already trying to get out of his grasp and past him, but he held her back, his eyes boring into hers:

"Don't finish the whole house without me!" Jay tried to joke.

She was certainly too tired for that, so she gave him a look that said: 'Please, are you kidding me?' making him smile again and press a long closed-lip kiss to her mouth: "I won't be out too long!"

"Ya, see you at home!"

He jogged back to Hailey, grabbing the jacket he'd left hanging over the railing downstairs as he went. Rianne caught Hailey's eyes when following Jay's descent and brought up her hand for a small wave that the blonde answered with a thankful nod before she followed her partner out the door.

Cleaning up before she called it a night to get back to a comfy bed and a waiting Límon to keep her company, Rianne took in the pizza boxes on the makeshift table: They hadn't been touched besides the two slices she had taken out for herself earlier. Seemed Jay's appetite had been spoiled by Hailey's news. A feeling of heaviness crept in. She took them back to the apartment, maybe he'd be hungry when he got back.

But it was way past two a.m. when Jay came home. Rianne heard him sneak in, then hover in the doorway to the bedroom for a minute or two, an air of bar smell wafting in when he abruptly turned around and left to go back into the kitchen.
She didn't follow him or let him know that she was awake again, because her gut told her not to. Something was off, but Rianne knew he needed to process whatever it was alone, even if it killed her that she couldn't fall asleep until he came to bed. It took over an hour of constantly checking her alarm clock and listening for sounds, until she heard him in the bathroom and then thankfully come to take his place beside her. A hint of bourbon hit her nose, a tell-tale sign that he'd spent his hour alone in the dark apartment taking a nightcap.

Feeling Jay looking at her again before he sighed and settled in underneath his duvet, made her sick to her stomach somehow. Especially when he didn't wrap her in his arms like he normally did. Rianne felt he was laying on his back, probably staring up at the ceiling. Jay never fell asleep on his back.
When she couldn't bear it anymore she finally reached out her hand behind her, searching for his. Freezing in anticipation really wasn't her style and maybe this uneasy feeling was just in her head. So Rianne was somehow relieved when he reacted, took her hand and finally turned on his side to snuggle up to her. But why did it feel like an apology when he whispered "I love you" close to her shoulder?

Jay got back up at half past five a.m. Not that he really had been able to sleep. Careful not to wake Rianne he got up and ready to take a very early trip to his gym as going for a run in this kind of weather was not really a safe option. But he so needed an outlet.

After pushing some weights and running a few miles on the treadmill, he felt slightly better and took a shower at the gym to be ready for work in time. On his way back Jay drove past Rianne's favorite bakery and got a fresh croissant for her. He put it up on the kitchen-counter with a note while she was still sleeping in and left for the station.
Everything about his behavior screamed 'guilty conscience'. He knew that, but right now he didn't know how to handle it any better.

Even if he wasn't sure what exactly he was feeling guilty about. It hadn't been like he had planned anything to happen last night other than comforting his partner and friend and saying a proper goodbye to her before she left for that godawful FBI loan out assignment in New York of all places. Nothing else than trying to make sense of it and wrap his head around the fact that yet another partner was leaving him, albeit only for a supposed short while.
But then he could still very clearly hear Hailey's whispered "Please don't get married while I'm gone?", her eyes pleading, a little glassy in the glow of her porch light, from the drinks she'd had and tears she had shed. Before Jay could really understand what she meant by that he had felt her lips on his, leaving him befuddled and reeling while the front-door slammed shut behind her and he was left outside, wondering what the hell just happened and what to make of it all.

She'd probably be in the air on her way to New York by now and she had insisted that she didn't want him to take her, otherwise she'd claimed she would never board that plane. But Jay couldn't just let this go. Just like it had almost felt impossible to let her go. He needed her to have his back at work! She was his constant there since almost four years.
Still sitting in his truck in front of the precinct now and wondering who he'd be partnered up with from now on and how it would feel to walk into the bullpen knowing Hailey would not come in, neither today nor for the foreseeable future, he shot her a text:

"We need to talk about what happened!"

So? What's your take? Should Jay tell Rianne about it and how exactly would he do it? Also we're going to be circling back next chapter on how exactly Jay and Hailey's talk went, at least I think we are ;-).