Ramen Doodles

By Andrew J. Talon

Disclaimer: I do not and probably never will own Naruto or any other copyrighted works mentioned in this story. I am not writing this for profit.

A bit more exploration of Sasuke's preference for Sakura.

Sakura: "So Sasuke! Wanna go on a date?"

Sasuke: "Shut it, Sakura. You're annoying." He gave her the stuffiest, most infuriating expression he could.

Inside though...

Sasuke: Come on you beautiful goddess, hit me already! I wish to feel the tender caress of your fist against my face. COME ON!

Naruto: "Wow! Sasuke thinks you're annoying, Sakura! But I don't!"

Sakura: "SHUT UP!" Punches him, sending him flying

Sasuke: GODDAMNIT!

Sasuke puts his genius intellect to work.

Sasuke: "Sakura... We're going to spar."

Sakura: "Oh, I could never spar against you, Sasuke!"

Sasuke: DAMNIT WOMAN!

Sasuke: "You're weak. You need to get stronger. We're sparring."

Sakura: "Er, well... I mean-"

Sasuke: "We're sparring."

Sakura: "I-I can't just hurt you! I would never hurt you! I mean, after everything-"

Sasuke's genius intellect was now taken over by his surging teenaged hormones.

Sasuke: "DAMNIT JUST HIT ME ALREADY!"

Sakura: "S-Sasuke?!"

Sasuke: "HIT ME ALREADY YOU STUPID COW!"

Sakura: Tears up and runs away

Sasuke: "... FUCK!"

Naruto finally gets up and shakes his head.

Naruto: "Dude... you're trying too hard."

Sasuke: "What do you know?! She hits you every chance she gets!"

Naruto: "Yep. So you're missing the one critical piece."

Sasuke: "Which is?"

Naruto: "How good is your henge?"

A bit later, "Naruto" finds the crying Sakura on a bench. Sasuke really hates seeing Sakura cry.

Sasuke: As Naruto "Hey Sakura-chan! Come on! You know you want to hit me! It'll make you feel better!" He grins "Don't worry about that bastard, and just let loose! I can take it!"

Sakura: "No! No, I-I can't even hit you, Naruto! I'LL NEVER HIT ANYONE AGAIN!" She bawls "That's what I am! A-A berserker!"

Sasuke: FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUCK! Damnit, she's trained under Tsunade and yet she... AHA!

Sasuke: "... Not even if I did... This?" Sasuke gropes her chest

Sakura: "AH! YOU BASTARD!" PUNCH!

As Sasuke flies away, he is crying tears of joy

Sasuke: Sweet mystery of life, I finally found you~...

In the future, when Sakura has wrecked yet another of their houses.

SAKURA: "NOOOOO! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!"

Sakura collapses in despair.

SARADA: "NOT AGAIN, MAMA!"

SASUKE: "Eh, it's just a house. We'll buy another."

SARADA: "Wha-?! How can you be so OKAY with THIS, Papa?!"

Sasuke looks warmly at Sakura AND the destruction his wife caused while the saxophone from "Careless Whisper" plays in the background of his mind.

SASUKE: "...I have my reasons."

Sadomasochist!Sasuke is best Sasuke.