Part 73 – Altitude

Author's Note: Thank you all very much for reading this over the years. I really, really appreciate it, and I wouldn't have written this much without your support.

As for this chapter… Sorry that it took a bit longer to come out than I anticipated. Honestly going over my old writing and comparing it to my current stuff is like… cringey. I have a lot of cringe-like feelings towards my writing. But what's important right now is that I get this fic finished and out. So I'm working on that.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

It had been three hours since Shikamaru had stormed into Naruto's office with his ultimatum, and he still didn't know what to do. He didn't know where to go. He didn't quite know what to think. He did know what he wanted, what he needed; to find a way to end the cycle of hatred that choked his village. And to do that... he had to...

But he didn't know how to do it. He knew what he had to do, but he didn't know how to do it. And this is why he was now nursing a cup of sake and sitting at his dinner table with his son. There was a chill in the air that made speaking difficult, so neither of them did for a very long while. The mackerel was tough enough to eat. They didn't want to choke on their words as well.

It took them a while, but eventually their dinner was finished, and Shikadai joined his father in washing the dishes. There were still no words, but now there were worried glances, and that was when the phone began to ring. Shikamaru immediately strode over, in his mind praying that it was Naruto, having finally come to his senses and deciding to follow his friend's desperate advice. But that would have been too much luck.

"...Shikamaru? Is that you?"

The voice belonged to Shino Aburame. Shikamaru leaned on the table on which his phone rested, and prepared himself for what he would say next. Knowing how quickly knowledge tended to spread among the Konoha 9, he was sure that Shino already knew what he had said and done. Sighing deeply, Shikamaru prepared himself for another threat, or perhaps this time a simple notification. A morbid curiosity led to to him continuing the conversation.

"Good evening Shino." His voice held irritation and tiredness.

"G-"

"If you're about to threaten me, shut up. 'Cause I've already heard of all the ways I could possibly die because I'm doing this-"

"Shikamaru, I wouldn't be calling you if I was going to kill you. And we both know, if I was going to kill you, you'd be dead already." He went silent for a while, letting the reality gradually seep in. "...This phone call isn't even about you. Who is the subject of this conversation? It's Shikadai. I want to talk to you about Shikadai-"

"He wont be going back to shinobi school." Shikamaru said this firmly, without even asking his son for his own opinion, but the look that Shikadai gave him from the corner of his eye showed nothing but gratitude. "I… I haven't thought of a proper substitute yet, but I will find one."

"Indeed, and we wouldn't want him to. It's clear that he belongs elsewhere."

"Glad to hear that you agree."

"...He still needs to stay in school, Shikamaru, but have you thought of sending him to regular school? Or rather, I mean school for non-shinobi. School for civilians."

There was a pause, and Shikamaru watched Shikadai for a few moments. The pause ended when Shino began to speak again, but the father's watch didn't. Shikadai was currently cleaning their kitchen table, Shikamaru soon found his focus directed towards his son's hands. What if… what if they never had to be stained with blood again?

Shino went into details about the school, being able to personally vouch for it due to his own husband being the principal there. Lesson plans were focused more on everyday life and general education, not subterfuge and murder. The school day was significantly shorter than shinobi school as well. Children were prepared to continue studying at higher institutions, or were prepared to go directly into the workforce after their graduation. As the educator went on, Shikamaru grew more and more pleased, but also more suspicious. There had to be- wait.

"...Tell me something only Shino would know," he suddenly snapped. He regained focus on the phone call as Shikadai moved into another room.

"Sounding too good to be true? Yes, it does. And I guess it is suspicious that I'm offering this to you so quickly after everything that's happened." There was a pause on the other end of the line, and in the interim before Shino spoke again, Shikamaru noticed a weird, fuzzy sound on the line.

"…I know that you're seven-"

"Okay okay okay!" Shikamaru blushed, remembering the incident that caused Shino to know that factoid about him. "You're the real Shino alright. When's the earliest that Shikadai could try out this civilian school?"

"Tomorrow morning, if he really wanted to. My husband's class has a few extra openings, and they just started a new semester." Slyly, he added "your outburst couldn't have come at a better time."

Shikadai finished washing the dishes, and then turned back to his father, which is when Shikamaru realized that he had been aware that the conversation was about him the entire time. This would warrant a talk with him but… yes. What Shino was proposed was exactly what the man had wanted for his son; an opportunity, a chance, an alternative. Shikamaru nodded, then turned away from his son, rapping his fingers against the table in front of him.

"Alright then, I'll run it by him. If Shikadai wants to switch schools, you'll notice it in the morning." A pause.

"Thanks Shino. For everything."

Shino gave a satisfied sound, knowing that Shikamaru was really thanking him for his unspoken loyalty and understanding, and then he hung up. The moment that he did, Shikamaru's hopeful mood changed, and he barked into the line.

"If anything happens to Shikadai tomorrow, I swear to God, I'll fucking kill you, Konohamaru."

At this, the fuzz on the other end of the line stopped, and sure enough and as predicted, the voice of Konohamaru Sarutobi came through on another end of the line, one that Shikamaru previously would have never thought to be used against him.

"...You're playing a very dangerous game, Shikamaru. Stop it before you go too far-"

"So putting my son into a school that'll lead him to a better career is treason now?"

"I know what you said during your last meeting with Naruto. At this point we all know." Konohamaru took a deep breath, and Shikamaru could almost hear the regret that was heavy in his voice.

"Kakashi-sensei says that there's a reason why this village is run the way it is. He says there's a reason why the world works the way it does-"

"Spare me the history lesson, and I'll spare you my explanations and lectures-"

"Just stop, Shikamaru. Before you start a civil… war. Don't you think it'll get really messy, really fast? You already have Shino agreeing with you… what next? The Akimichi, the Yamanaka? Will it be your four clans against the rest of the village?"

"May-"

"We don't want to kill you. But we will have to if you keep infecting people-"

"Infecting people? With what, the truth-"

"What do you think will happen if shinobi stop fighting? Do you think the other villages are just going to let us be, let us transition from warriors to producers or whatever you're thinking we should become? Do you think that we can just… stop the hatred by throwing down our arms? Do you think they'll throw down theirs too?"

Shikamaru went quiet for a few moments, realizing that he hadn't really thought of this part of his plan. Hastily, he hung up, and then turned to begin to tell Shikadai what he and Shino had spoken about. He would deal with the schematics of his plan and wish later. For now, all he wanted was for his son, his only son, to be safe.

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Sasuke Uchiha felt uneasy, and it was all Shikamaru's fault.

"Sasuke?" The head of the Uchiha clan turned his head, and then quickly remembered where he was. To his right side was Sakura, and to his left was Sarada. It had been a few hours since Shikamaru's outburst, and he and his family were having dinner together in their home. In front of him was a gracious display of food, something that he and his wife both created together mere moments ago-

"Sasuke? Is something wrong?"

Sasuke blinked again, and this time remembered what he had been doing; blessing the table before they started. He placed his hands together and then bowed his head, the rest of his family following through as well, and said a quick 'thank you' to the heavens for their meal. Once everyone began to eat again, Sasuke's mind returned to earlier in the day, to the scene of Shikamaru's greatest crime, and the man's blasphemous words played again and again in his head in an unending mantra.

"Do you think that these wars would be nearly as frequent, or nearly as deadly, if shinobi were to cease to exist?"

"All of those threats became threats because of the warfare and strife that the wars that fuel our world caused."

"Maybe Team Taka weren't so wrong after all..."

A deep, troubled frown appeared on his face. It was official, then. Whatever injuries that Shikamaru had sustained during the war had drove him mad, and now he was nothing more than a raving lunatic… no. Sasuke didn't believe that for a moment. He still had all his faculties, he had been there when Yoki had admitted to his crimes… he had seen much of what Shikamaru spoke of. The cycle, the pendulum… the cycle of hatred was a very real thing, and Sasuke himself had once been wrapped up in it. It wasn't too far fetched to think that it could be extended village wide… but still.

A world with no shinobi… it was almost impossible to envision.

"Sasuke dear, we didn't cook this dinner just for you to stare over it."

With this, Sasuke began to dig into the food in front of him, and paused his thoughts, allowing himself to engage in the time that he had with his family. Back during the war times like these were sparse, but now with the war over he looked forwards to spending quality time with them, eating, shooting the breeze, perhaps even gaming or seeing a movie. Such things were impossible for him to do mere weeks ago.

Eventually Sakura brought him into a conversation with Sarada, a conversation that slowly turned into a debate over who the best overall baseball player was, and after a while Shikamaru's words snuck back into his mind. This time, they caused him to rest his eyes on his daughter, and here his pupils remained for a while. He thought back to when he was around Sarada's age, the things that he had done, hell, the things that most Genin had done. He remembered Zabuza, he remembered Haku, both for the first time in months. He remembered Haku's status as a tool, and how… normal that had been. Normal for a young boy to be used up and used fully by a man old enough to be his father, but not his father. He could remember himself nearly dying… he could remember that knucklehead Naruto, he could remember his then hapless wife.

But then his thoughts decided to linger on Haku, and Haku's fate, and how he had seen such situations replayed a thousandfold in the years since he had become a shinobi. Young men and women used, like tools, but they were tools, because they were shinobi. To be a shinobi was to be a tool…

"Don't you want our kids to be safe? To live better lives than we did?"

… Sasuke then remembered Orochimaru, and all the things that the man had done to him and done with him…

"We turned out just fine."

"You call this 'just fine'?"

… He had been a tool once, too. But no longer… but yes. Yes. He was still a tool, wasn't he? A man that Naruto trot out when he was needed, with everything else in his life being conditional or unexpected. If he truly wanted to, he could ignore his wife and child. But he could never ignore Naruto's orders, no matter how nice-sounding they were…

"The Will of Fire dictates that we must protect the next generation at all costs. And by destroying the system we have, I'm going to protect our children from dying in a future war, and continuing the cycle for their children."

...Damn crazy psychotic fu-

"Dad, you've been staring at me for a while."

Sasuke came back to the present, and noticed that he had been staring at Sarada for a long while now, blank faced and mouth slightly agape. He quickly fixed himself, said a quick apology and then calmed Sakura's nerves. But his mind kept thinking, and even generous amounts of rice and chicken wouldn't fix that. Even an evening of watching quality television with his wife and daughter wouldn't fix that.

And even a night full of lovemaking couldn't take his mind off of it.

Sasuke held Sakura in his arms as she slept, pleased with both of their performances for that night, but his mind still very troubled from what had happened earlier on that day. Still troubled. And at that point, the concerns about the life that Sarada would have were joined by another concern. He rubbed Sakura's back, trying to comfort himself again, but to no avail.

"But do you? Do you have any idea of what happened back then?"

Of course he did… no. No he truly hadn't. He didn't know… yes. Yes he did!

His clan was slaughtered because of the actions of a few- wait, no, that wasn't right! Yes, yes it was. And Sasuke was a coward for ever taking Kakashi's deal, for taking a chance at having a family again and freedom over exposing the truth and the corruption inherent in Konohagakure's government. He was a coward and a fool, a coward and a fool.

He couldn't handle himself, not now, and not like this. He needed to think, he needed uninterrupted, unbridled time to just think about what had happened. Because the longer that he thought about it, the more that Shikamaru's words began to ring true, at least for him, the former rebel and former avenger of his clan. But if they rang true… and if he…

He looked down at Sakura's sleeping figure, and his eyes widened with horror. Then, slowly, he placed a kiss on her rather large forehead, and moved so softly off of the bed that she didn't stir. Once he was out of bed, he quickly put on an old cloak and some boots, and prepared himself for a few day's journey. He couldn't take them with him, he couldn't even tell them where he was going, lest they get dragged into this foolishness as well. All he could do was leave, all he could do was leave and hope and pray that he would find the answer to his dilemma while he still had options, while there were still sides to be on, before the Konohan government slaughtered the Nara clan, as was precedence, or before Shikamaru started a coup. So he would leave them here, he would find a secluded place to think, to truly think about what had happened to him in his life, and to think about the future, to ensure that Sarada could have one.

… Oh God… what was he doing? Not again, not again.

He strode back over to Sakura. No, she deserved better- no, he had to leave. He had to leave now. He gave her another kiss, this time on the lips, this time punctuated with him resting his forehead on hers. He had to pull himself away from her so that he could leave to say a nonverbal goodbye to his daughter, a kiss on the cheek and a forehead nuzzle was in order for her too. Then, exiting the front door, Sasuke left his home, and hoped that by the time he returned it wouldn't be burning.

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"Ah, Shikadai. Fancy meeting you here."

...Oh no.

"Oh no no, stay still please. I just wanted to talk to you about something, that's all."

Kakashi's voice was deceptively friendly, and Shikadai Nara knew exactly why. As he heard footsteps approach him, footsteps that he knew Kakashi was letting him hear, a multitude of strategies came into his head, but they all dictated the same thing. Run. Run away, for he knew that his father's outburst the day before meant that this 'convenient' meeting between he and the former Hokage was dangerous, to say the absolute least.

Quietly, he gathered his nerves, trying to shield himself with logic as he usually did. He can't kill me, he wouldn't kill me… would he? Before leaving for school, he and his father had a light breakfast, over which the boy had asked the elder Nara about the trouble that they were in, and the possible consequences that would come to them. Shikamaru had shuddered, but didn't bother to lie or downplay the possible consequences of his actions. Then, remembering that he had very well had made his own son a target, he had promised that he would watch over him, and that nothing bad would come towards him. Because of this, the boy was sure that, at least somewhere, his father was watching him from the shadows.

But would his father be a match for Kakashi if Kakashi decided to…?

No. Stay brave.

Shikadai took a deep, audible breath, then turned around to face Kakashi, his face trying to be as neutral as possible. And I had such a great day at school today. Troublesome. Kakashi's face was unreadable as usual, but the boy knew better. For him to approach him now, mere minutes since the end of the school day and out in the open like this, as Shikadai's new schoolmates went to their parents or otherwise walked home… whatever message that the man had must have been important.

Weaker than he wished to, Shikadai raised a hand and waved, putting on a forced smile. "Lord Kakashi. I didn't expect to see you here… err… how's your day-"

"Let's skip the pleasantries, shall we? Your father barged into a meeting two days ago and said some very controversial, very dangerous things. I'm here to just make sure that you don't end up on the same path as him, by explaining why everything he's done since that day has been wrong."

Shikadai cringed, but then tried to figure out a way to properly respond to the man in front of him. Preferably a way that would ease off suspicion.

"...I know he's wrong. Err, that's why-"

"You don't need to lie to me. And in case you were stressing out about it, I'm not here to hurt you." To further his point, Kakashi leaned against a nearby wall to relax himself. "Matter of fact, I'm here to save you. After all, such a brilliant young mind shouldn't go to waste, right? I don't want to lose someone with so much potential as a shinobi."

Shikadai felt the weight of a thousand pounds taken off of his shoulders, and let himself relax. He knew that the rest of this conversation would likely be some sort of verbal spat, but everything was better now that the threat of death was off the table. When Kakashi spoke again, Shikadai was ready for him his questions.

"...I see you went to the non-shinobi school today..."

"I did. And I had lots of fun, actually."

"Lots of fun? With you? At school? I find that hard to believe."

"Well believe it, because I really enjoyed myself today." Kakashi smirked at the boy's reference to the current Hokage, but his next words dripped with warning.

"Things that are new always seem better than the things that are old, don't they? At least at first. I'm sure within a week you'll be missing your friends and clan at the other school. Not to mention the sub-par phys ed that they offer." He waved his hand.

"All that stuff you've learned today is irrelevant to you anyway. Soon, you'll be the leader of a great ninja clan. For what reasons will you need to know civilian grade things anyway?"

"I don't know. Maybe I'm just being curious. Maybe I just want to know… and maybe I don't want to be a ninja…?" Almost instantly, the false friendly look on Kakashi's face faded away, and was replaced with a look of genuine concern for the boy. At this point, Shikadai didn't know what to think, and the look had meant hat his initial strategy, based on the assumption that Kakashi could care less about the boy and simply wanted to uphold status quo, had to be changed. Or maybe I don't need a strategy. Maybe I should just…

"Don't be foolish. You don't have to follow your father's actions, you know. I know that you only came to school today based on his recommendation-"

"No I didn't. It…. He received a call from a teacher here that said that my talents would be better suited here. Then, I decided to check this place out." Shikadai narrowed his eyes.

"It was my choice-"

"Then you made a bad choice. And I still don't believe that it wasn't influenced at least in part by your father-"

"Lord Kakashi, why is it so hard for you to think that I don't want to be a ninja?! I don't want to be like my Mom and Dad, they're great people, but some of the things they've done?" Then, the memory of the war returned to him, and he struggled to keep his tears at bay. "Some of the things that I've done already…? I'm done with it. I don't want to do it anymore."

Suddenly, Kakashi knelt down to Shikadai's level, just after he took a few steps forwards the boy to make sure that his next words were personal.

"My condolences for what happened to you during the war, and what you had to do to defend yourself. Under normal circumstances, please understand that those shinobi would have never been able to get anywhere close to you. But I'm proud that you were able to survive, and that you were able to protect yourself, even with the little ninjutsu that you knew. And, in truth, what happened to you demonstrates exactly why ninja exist in our village operate in the first place. To protect children like you, so that you may grow older and help us protect the next generation. What your father is proposing… it may sound good in concept, but if there are no more shinobi… who will protect the next generation as effectively as we? Where and how will you be able to follow your will of fire?"

"In the future I'll be able to find something will let me follow my will of fire. In a way that's better than the path that's out in front of me right now."

Kakashi blinked, and Shikadai continued, knowing that if he didn't take advantage of Kakashi's slip now, he might not find another time to do so. "… I'm hoping to become a scientist one day. A physicist, maybe. Depends on if I get bored or not, but you get the idea. Either one of those things… I could create things that could help people. I could develop things that could help improve daily life… maybe I could…" His voice faded away, and he sighed.

"I don't know exactly. But it's another way… and I'd like to explore that way. At least for a little while longer, until I decide for certain what I want to do with my life." Then, he refocused on the ex-Kage in front of him, and for once didn't break eye-contact.

"And I think that I should be free to explore. It's my life, after all. ...Right? Me exploring different parts of myself can't possibly be a hostile act toward the village… can it…?"

Kakashi remained frozen, and his eyes searched Shikadai for any further signs of weakness, discomfort or uncertainty, but he saw nothing. The boy had clearly made up his mind, and he was standing with his back arched up high and proud. There would be no cowing him from his position, at least not today. Kakashi held his gaze for a few moments longer, before his mind returned to that night in Yamato's apartment…

Something changed about him then, and he felt something come toward him and grip his heart in a way that was sudden and slightly disconcerting. He made a face for a moment, one hidden behind his mask, and then he nodded once, showing Shikadai that he had been heard.

"...You tread a difficult path, Shikadai," he warned in conclusion, but he didn't allow himself to elaborate. He simply slinked away as he was known to do, and left Shikadai standing on his own in the path. The young boy took a deep breath, before he allowed more of his fear to become present on his face, and he hurried home.

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Shikamaru regretted having Shikadai walk his way home the moment that Shikadai met with him again, in their dining room over dinner. Shikadai tried to hide how scared he had been of the former Kage, but his fear seeped through his skin, and Shikamaru saw it clearly. It was abundantly clear to him now; the village the had had grown up in and fought so hard to protect was now hostile to him and his, and he needed a safe place to go in order to think of what he would do next, now that it was obvious that he would have to go against the village. Against his old friends. Against Naruto.

His next few decisions were made quickly, and Shikamaru worried that it was the damaged part of himself that was acting now, not his previous genius. But nonetheless the events happened. He instructed Shikadai to pack all of his essentials, and admitted that he didn't know when they would be able to return. He did the same, and within an hour father and son were packed, and Shikamaru had been able to call the other leaders of his clan in order to warn them about what might happen, and to give Saburo the authority he would need to look after things in his stead. Everything was done very suddenly, but then again, so had his previous outburst. With luck, Saburo would, again, be able to look after the Nara clan until Shikamaru returned. This time the trip wouldn't be for too long; the destination that Shikamaru had in his mind wasn't too far from the village, and so they shouldn't have been gone for too long.

The idea of Shikamaru leaving Shikadai in the village to spend more time at the civilian school came through his mind, but after he realized the potential danger that he could be leaving his son in, the idea left his mind just as swiftly. Similarly, he thought about contacting Ino and Choji before leaving, but then decided against it. He decided that, if the worst happened and the Nara clan was attacked, that they would be attacked alone, and that the Akimichi and Yamanaka clan would be spared. They would understand in time.

Before Shikamaru and Shikadai left their home, they spent moments staring at it, as if they were etching it into their mind. The memories that they had made here traveled through their minds, ensuring that they wouldn't forget a thing. Then, Shikamaru made the first movement, and turned around to leave. Shikadai was soon after.

So the majority of this chapter was already written before I made my giant two-plus year hiatus. But I struggled to re-plot the ending to this story and to get back into the swing of writing like this. Now that I am, expect a new chapter soon. And thank you again for reading, as always!