A/N: This chapter contains shameless sexually explicit material. See end for more notes.
June 11. Somehow, Pacey awoke when the alarm went off at five in the morning. Not having fallen asleep until sometime around one, he forced himself to open his eyes and sit up, resisting the desire to sleep more because he knew if he didn't get up, he wouldn't—not for a long, long time.
At five-thirty, he joined Chef Mao in the kitchen. The man greeted him with a warm, friendly smile, and a steaming cup of coffee. "We not only cook for the Moore family and any guests they may have, but we provide a daily hot meal for the crew and staff on board when we are docked, and all three meals when we are at sea," he said while Pacey donned a white chef's jacket and an apron. "That is what your primary responsibility will be once we have got you trained up—feeding the crew."
He was soon put to work with a knife and a chopping board. Onions, eggplant, potatoes. After Pacey finished chopping the vegetables, he was told to place them on a baking sheet and lightly coat them with oil.
Mao opened the oven door and Pacey pushed the pan inside. "That is the secret to Italian stew. Bake the vegetables first," the chef said. "We start the stew early before breakfast because it will take all day to get the flavor just right."
Then Pacey opened several cans of diced tomatoes, and got to work on the sweet Italian sausage.
"James tells me that you received many compliments when you cooked at Danny Brecher's place in Key West," the chef said.
"Oh, well… I wasn't hired as a cook. I kind of did a little of everything. I mostly cooked whatever catch of the day that fishermen might've brought in for us to prepare for them. It wasn't something that happened every day, though."
"And James says you did it very well. I think both he and Danny were pleased."
Pacey threw him a curious glance as he tossed the sausage into a skillet. "You know Danny? I never met him. I only heard his voice on the telephone."
"Yes, I know him. I worked for him at a restaurant in New York. It is Danny who introduced me to Mr. Moore. They have invested in quite a few restaurants together."
They continued on the rest of the morning in the same way, preparing breakfast, and prepping for lunch and supper. Mao kept right on talking, instructing, teaching.
Later that afternoon, he walked up to the sun deck, and through the sliding glass door to see James. The two sat down, and Pacey told his new boss everything that had transpired over the past week with his arrest, arraignment, and conviction.
"You offered me the job back when I didn't have a criminal record," he said, feeling anxious, his guts tied in knots. "But now I do, and maybe I should've told you that when I called you… you know, before I came down here. I completely understand if you want to put me on a plane back home."
James smiled. "Pacey, a lot of the people who work in my kitchens have criminal records."
He looked at him with surprise. "Really?"
"The best chef I employ out in California, at the Ambrosia in Los Angeles, actually learned how to cook in prison."
"Wow. Uh… huh."
"And honestly? Most everyone gets arrested at some point. I've been arrested before. Public intoxication when I was twenty years old. It's not a big deal. Of course, I grew up in South Boston, so that opinion could just be a product of my environment. Most everyone I knew had had run-ins with the cops."
Then James smiled warmly. "But I appreciate you wanting to be honest with me, Pacey. I hope you'll always feel comfortable enough to tell me the truth… about anything."
Relief coursed through him. "Thank you."
Just then the sliding glass door opened, and Melanie appeared in a pale green sundress. "You ready?" she asked him, taking her sunglasses from the top of her head and putting them on.
"And where are you two off to?" James asked curiously.
"We're going into town to get me a SIM card for my cell phone," Pacey answered.
The man laughed breathlessly. "Okay. Have fun. You called Aaron, Melanie?"
"Yes, I did."
It wasn't long before Pacey was once again in the back seat of Aaron the Cab Driver's taxi. He and Melanie were taken to downtown Freeport. The streets were lined with various shops. Many people—clearly non-Bahamians—crowded the area, moving from shop to shop.
"Dese tourists. You always know wen der's a cruise ship docked," Aaron chuckled.
When they finally came to a shop with a colorful storefront, Pacey followed Melanie inside. Buying a SIM card was apparently as easy as buying a pack of gum. Afterwards, they meandered up the street, taking in the sights.
"You'll need to buy a SIM card wherever we go," Melanie told him. "The Bahamian one won't work in the Cayman Islands, for instance, which is where we're going next."
"When do we leave?"
"Friday. Captain Jenkins says it'll take four days to get there."
"How long does James plan on staying in the Caymans?"
She pursed her lips, thinking it over. "I've never been on these sailing trips with them before, so I'm not exactly sure, but I think they stay there a little longer than the other places they sail to. My uncle has a house on Grand Cayman, and so I think we'll be getting off the yacht for a while."
He arched a skeptical brow. "A house," he scoffed. "You mean an enormous mansion, am I right?"
Melanie laughed. "I think there's a bowling alley, a movie theater room, a pool, and a tennis court. Does that answer your question?"
"How long is a while?"
"Probably a couple weeks or more. Uncle James does a lot of business in George Town."
They stepped into a Chinese medicine and acupuncture shop. He browsed the shelves while Melanie collected whatever she'd wanted to get. Aaron pointed to a bright red box with bright red… well, Pacey didn't know what they were. "Dose t'ingums," the man chuckled.
"What are t'ingums?"
Standing at the shop counter, Melanie was amused. "T'ingums is just the Bahamian equivalent to the word whatchamacallits. Those things are tiger penises."
His eyes went wide. "Tiger penises?"
"It's the Far East's answer to Viagra," she explained. "They also sell it in powder form."
The shop clerk joined in the conversation, and conveyed how tiger penis could return an old geezer back to young stud status. Pacey looked at Aaron, who was shaking his head.
"Stick to conch, mon."
"Conch, like the shellfish?"
"It's an aphrodisiac," Melanie told him. "And quite popular in the Bahamas as such."
"We's goin ta market to get you some conch," Aaron said. "It make you strong tonight, mon." He glanced at Melanie, who was purchasing whatever items she'd picked out, and then winked at him.
Pacey laughed. "No, it's… it's okay. I don't need it."
They walked out of the shop and made for Aaron's taxicab. "You sure seem to know a lot about the local culture for someone who claims to have never been to the Caribbean."
"I said I'd never done these summer sailing trips. I didn't say I'd never been to the Bahamas before. My parents used to take us every year when we were kids, before they divorced when I was seventeen. It was our annual family vacation. My parents even honeymooned down here. They loved it here."
They walked in silence for a couple minutes.
"So…" Melanie said, humor in her voice. "Jessica told me that you think I look like your sister. Now, I met her at that barbecue at the bed and breakfast in Capeside, and I don't think I look anything like her."
He looked over at her and she laughed. "Oh, that was Gretchen. You resemble my older sister Amy. Dirty blond hair, green eyes, same figure… it's uncanny, frankly."
"What's she like?"
"Amy? Oh, she's a rebel turned wife and mother. Part of her is still a rebel, at least when it comes to her habit of intentionally pissing off our parents."
"Sometimes I wish I could be a rebel," Melanie said with a sigh. "But nope, I'm the good girl."
He chuckled. "Well, the summer has only just begun. Maybe you can find a way to stretch your wings and live on the edge before you go back to school."
She smiled up at him as they reached the taxi and he opened the back door. "Yeah, maybe."
After Aaron gave them a tour of Freeport from the back of his cab, they were back onboard Tabitha's Secret. Pacey went to the top deck and sat on a bench outside the captain's bridge. Pulling out a calling card and his cell phone with the new Bahamian SIM card, he dialed Joey's number. They chatted on the phone for almost an hour before he reluctantly hung up to return to his kitchen duties as the time for supper approached.
June 12. On Tuesday morning, the six o'clock alarm rang at her bedside and Joey rolled over to hit the snooze button. However, before she could allow herself to fall back asleep, she groaned and forced herself to get up. The B&B had guests, and they would need breakfast.
The way the reservation book was shaping up, it appeared as though they'd be booked solid with guests through the summer. Bodie and Bessie had agreed to let her take over Pacey's job as cook, although for breakfast only; she was abysmal and had no talent for any other meal. She'd mastered the art of pancakes, and while they weren't as great as Bodie's or Pacey's, they were pretty good.
That was her second job and paycheck secured. Now all she needed was to find a third. Once breakfast had been cooked and their guests fed, Joey spent the rest of the morning stopping by every restaurant in town and filling out applications. Shortly before five o'clock, she arrived at Leery's Fresh Fish for her shift. It was there she came face to face with Dawson for the first time since Sunday.
"Hi, Joey," he greeted as she tossed her bag into her locker in the coat room.
She refused to speak to him, ignoring him while she tied an apron around her skirted waist.
"So, you're just not going to talk to me? I mean, we work together. We'll have to talk at some point."
"You're right, Dawson," she said abruptly, turning to face him, her eyes hard. "Is there anything work-related you need to tell me right now?"
He sighed in defeat and walked away.
The rest of her shift was tense. Dawson's mere presence, bussing and cleaning off tables while she took orders and carried trays of food, was enough to set her on edge. At nine o'clock, she found herself knocking on Mrs. Leery's office door.
Gail smiled when she walked in and gestured for her to sit down in the chair in front of her desk. "What can I do for you, honey?"
"Um… I was wondering if I could adjust my schedule."
"Well, that shouldn't be too much of a problem, depending on what kind of adjustments you want to make."
"I was wondering if I could be taken off nights and work the day shift."
Mrs. Leery stared at her in surprise. "Are you sure that's what you want to do? You'll make more tips at night."
It was honestly worth it to avoid Dawson as much as possible. "Yes, I'm sure."
"Is there something I need to be concerned about?" Gail asked. "Has something happened on the evening shift that I should be aware of?"
"No, it's just…" She nervously tucked her hair behind an ear. "It's just that I know with Dawson's summer job with Jack… you know, the house painting… he'll be busy during the day and will mostly work here at night. So, I figured I should move to days."
Mrs. Leery gave her a saddened look. "Joey, I don't know what exactly has happened between you and my son, but I do know he's been absolutely miserable since he came home from graduation."
"Then I'm sure he would appreciate the space and won't mind getting some separation from me here at work."
"Okay, sweetie. As it turns out, you're in luck. Angela has been waiting for an opening on evenings, so I can just switch your shifts with hers."
"That'll work out fine. Thanks, Mrs. Leery."
It was shortly after eleven o'clock that Joey made a stop on the way home and pulled into the twenty-four-hour Shell station to fill up the truck. The gas station had a Help Wanted sign posted in the window, and she considered applying for the job. It probably wasn't too difficult to stand all day behind a counter and sell cigarettes and chewing gum. Her mind made up, she walked inside once her gas tank was full.
June 22. It was a Friday night in Capeside, and Joey had found herself at Andie's house. Jen was there as well as Jack and Tobey and Will Krudski. Mr. McPhee was in Rhode Island visiting Mrs. McPhee for the weekend. The group of friends had ordered pizza and watched a couple movies. Jack had also filled a large serving bowl with spiked punch and they all sorta got drunk. Well, everyone except Will, who didn't want to touch the stuff.
The girls eventually retreated, cups of spiked punch in hand, up to Andie's bedroom, leaving the guys to talk about whatever downstairs. Joey set her cup down on one of the bedside stands and fell back on the mattress.
"I miss Pacey," she frowned.
"We know," Jen said.
"I think that's like the twentieth time you've said those words in the last three hours," Andie remarked. "You guys talk on the phone, don't you?"
"Of course… every day." Joey laughed. "Bessie actually made me go out and get my own cell phone 'cause she said I was tying up the B&B's line too much."
"Well, it's nice you get to talk to him all the time."
"Yeah, but it's not the same." She stared up at the ceiling with heavy lids. "I miss his face, his hair, his voice." Warmth rose within her that had nothing to do with the alcohol. "His lips, his hands, his…" She blushed and fell silent.
"His what, Joey?" Jen said with arched brows, teasing her.
She giggled, but didn't say anything.
"So, how are things with Will?" Jen asked, changing the topic.
Andie smiled. "Really good. I'm very happy."
"Come on, I want the sordid details."
Laughing into her cup, Andie didn't reply.
Jen huffed in annoyance. "Look, my love life circled the drain a long time ago. I need to live vicariously through my friends. Joey? How's the long distance thing going? Have you become desperate enough for phone sex yet?"
She laughed, and then let the words sink in. "Honestly, I never even thought of that."
"What?" Jen replied, shocked. "Pacey hasn't even brought it up?"
"Well, he's on a yacht and his phone doesn't work down in his room. He's not about to… do that outside where anyone can just walk in on him."
"But didn't you say he's in Grand Cayman now and staying in some huge mansion?" Andie said.
Joey thought for a second. "Oh, yeah. Yeah, he is. They got there Monday."
Jen grinned. "Does he have his own room?"
"I… I think so." She suddenly felt warm all over, could feel the heat rising in her face. "I can't do that, though."
"What? Phone sex? Why not?"
"Because it would be too embarrassing, Jen. What would I even say?"
"The same stuff you'd say if he was there, except you say it on the phone," Andie told her matter-of-factly.
"Oh, geez…"
Jen laughed. "Girl, what's wrong with you? Phone sex can be a lot of fun. You better get some."
Her face became even redder. It felt too weird to talk about Pacey this way with his ex-girlfriend in the room. "We don't need to talk about this. Andie, let's talk about you and Will instead."
"Yes, let's," Jen said excitedly.
"What do you want to know?"
Joey pushed herself up on her elbows and exchanged looks with Jen, smirking. "Is he good in bed?" she asked.
Andie blushed. "Joey—"
Jen interrupted her. "How good?"
"Good," she answered quickly.
"How good?" Jen pushed. "God-like good or just… you know… good-good?"
Sighing, Joey lay back down and stared longingly up at the ceiling. "Pacey is god-like good," she said dreamily, and wondered if the phone sex thing might actually be a good idea. She had a feeling he'd be really good at it. He talked all the time when they had sex. "And his voice. Oh, my God, his voice."
Her two friends started laughing. "Don't mind her," Jen said. "Back to Will."
"Remember how I told you guys about Lorenzo…?"
"Your man in Italy? Yeah."
"He's better than Lorenzo," Andie whispered, her eyes going wide, and then she giggled.
"Really?" Jen breathed. "Is he better than Pacey?" she asked in a low voice.
Andie lifted her cup of spiked punch to her mouth. "I'm not answering that question," she replied in a tone that brooked no argument. "Anyway, Joey," she said, speaking louder. "How's your new job?"
"The gas station? It's all right, and it actually pays nine bucks an hour. I couldn't believe it. Can't beat that around here."
"I'm glad you had the night off and could hang out with us," Jen said.
"Me too. Back to work tomorrow night though, six to midnight."
Andie moved to sit cross-legged on the bed. "How's things at the Leery's restaurant? Do you see Dawson much?"
At the mention of Dawson, she frowned. "Only in passing… sometimes."
"How are you feeling about that whole situation?" Jen asked.
Joey pushed herself up into a sitting position, and looked at her friends. "You know, I've been thinking about the past few years of my life, just trying to remember every conversation, every moment that I missed because I was too blind or ignorant to see what was really happening. And it just goes around and around inside my mind. Things are just so much clearer to me now."
She sighed heavily. "I mean, remember the Spring Formal freshman year? Dawson didn't really want to be there with me. He just didn't want Pacey to take me."
Jen and Andie exchanged looks. "Jo, we weren't here freshman year," Jen said.
"Oh, right," she giggled. "I forgot. Sometimes it seems as if you guys have always been here."
"Nope. It was just the three of you," Andie said.
"Yeah," Joey breathed. "The three of us."
1998
April 4. It was a rather chilly Saturday night in downtown Capeside when Pacey walked out the Rialto's doors, his best friend following him out to the sidewalk. "God, that movie sucked," Dawson said.
"At least Heather Graham was hot."
"Very hot. But I can't believe someone as talented as Gary Oldman would agree to be in such crap."
"And you thought Mercury Rising was bad last night." Pacey shook his head. "This was way worse."
Dawson scoffed. "What a waste of money. I want a refund. The movie we make this summer is gonna be way better than that turd."
They made their way down the street, heading for the restaurant where they were supposed to meet Mr. and Mrs. Leery to catch a ride home. It was then that they saw an unwelcome face walking towards them.
"Here comes Satan's little helper," Pacey muttered, and Dawson laughed.
The girl put on a big fake smile as she approached. "Well, if it isn't Tweedledee and Tweedledumbass."
"Hi, Abby," Dawson greeted with a frown.
"You two have a date tonight or something?"
Pacey rolled his eyes. "You know what, Abby? I'm jealous of all the people who haven't met you."
"Keep rolling your eyes, Pacey. Maybe you'll find a brain back there." Then she sighed and threw them another fake smile. "I don't suppose you two losers are going to the Spring Formal?"
Dawson scoffed. "School dances are lame."
Abby laughed caustically. "Are you just saying that because you know that no girl in her right mind would agree to go with you? Of course, that's not entirely your fault. I mean, if I had a face like yours, I'd sue my parents." Then she turned to Pacey. "So, do you have a date?"
"I haven't asked anyone, no." He glanced at his best friend, who was now scowling.
"Well, you could always ask me." She smirked at him tauntingly.
Pacey laughed. "Abby, if you were on fire and I had water, I'd drink it."
Sneering, she walked off mumbling insults under her breath, finally leaving them alone. "Her birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory," he said to Dawson as they once again started heading in the direction of the restaurant.
They walked in silence for some moments. If he was honest with himself, he had been thinking about the upcoming dance quite a lot lately. "You know, Dawson… if you asked Joey to the dance, she'd say yes. I think she wants you to. I mean, it's pretty obvious she wants to go with the way she kept talking about it the other day."
His friend laughed. "Joey? Put on a dress and go to a dance? Yeah, right. Besides, she agreed with me. She said school dances suck."
"You need to read between the lines, Dawson. You don't want to ask her?"
"No, why would I?" Dawson laughed again. "Don't be ridiculous."
A hopeful feeling rose in his chest. "Well… what if someone else asks her?"
Scoffing, his friend gave him a skeptical look. "Like who?"
"I don't know." He shrugged his shoulders casually, but he felt his face burning. "Would it bother you if she went to the dance with someone?"
"Why would it bother me? She can do whatever she wants."
"You really wouldn't care?"
Now Dawson looked annoyed. "No, I wouldn't care. Why do you think that I would?"
Pacey did not want to have that conversation. Sometimes his friends' possessiveness was stifling. He understood where Joey's came from: her possessiveness grew from the fear that yet another person she cared about and trusted would be taken from her. But Dawson? He didn't quite understand his side of it. His possessiveness only seemed to show itself whenever Pacey intruded on a friendship Dawson apparently wanted all to himself.
"So, if one of the boys in school asked Joey to the dance, you'd be totally fine with it?"
"Of course. It's not like I'm gonna ask her. So, if someone else asks her, and she actually wants to go, good for her."
Feeling emboldened, he smiled and nodded. "Do you think she'd say yes if I asked her?"
Dawson stopped walking. Sensing this, Pacey had only taken a few more steps before he also stopped and turned around to face him. "What?"
"You want to ask Joey to the dance?"
"Well, I was thinking about it," he shrugged, trying to come off nonchalant. "There's no one at school I like as much as her, and seeing as how I only really like her half the time, that's saying something. Do… do you think she'd say yes?"
His friend swallowed. "Uh, well, she doesn't exactly like you either."
Uncertainty rising inside him, he frowned. "So, you think she'd say no if I asked?"
"I… I don't know what she'd say, Pace." His brows furrowed as if he also felt uncertain, and Pacey could see Dawson had meant what he said: he didn't know whether Joey would say yes or no.
Lost in thought, the remainder of his walk with Dawson was silent.
On Monday morning at school, his heart in his throat and his guts churning, Pacey walked quickly to find Joey before the first bell rang.
Smiling to herself, feeling excited and anxious for Friday night, Joey hoisted her backpack over her shoulder and closed her locker to see Pacey coming to an abrupt stop right in front of her.
"Hi, Jo."
She laughed. "Hi, Pacey."
He smiled at her friendliness and his heart warmed at her unusual morning cheerfulness. "You're in a good mood."
She flipped her hair behind an ear and tried not to blush. "Yeah, I guess so."
"Well, since you're in a good mood, then I guess this is the best time to…" He cleared his throat. Butterflies invaded his stomach. "So, you know the Spring Formal is this Friday, and so I—"
"I know. Dawson asked me." She bit down on her lip to stop herself from grinning like a fool.
He stared, his mouth falling open. "Asked you what?"
"To the dance, duh."
A powerful disappointment came over him. "But… I thought… I thought Dawson didn't want to go to the dance."
Joey nodded, and recalled Dawson being adamant about not wanting to have anything to do with it, just as he'd been back in February about the Sadie Hawkins Dance. She had suspected he'd only taken that stance because someone else had already asked Meghan Arliss to be their date.
She turned to start walking to Homeroom. "I did, too, but yesterday when he asked me, he said he'd changed his mind."
While walking beside her, and before he had a chance to gather his thoughts and say anything, Dawson appeared in the hallway.
"Hey, guys."
"Hi, Dawson," Joey smiled.
Pacey swallowed as he stared at his best friend, disappointed but not surprised. Of course, the guy didn't want him to take Joey to the dance. He walked quietly beside his friends with they talked. With Dawson there, her attention was immediately diverted, and she no longer even gave him a passing glance. Just then the bell rang for Homeroom, and he made his excuse to leave. Saved by the bell, he thought with an inward sigh. He shook himself, turning away from the forceful reminder that he would never be able to supplant Dawson's position in Joey's life.
Later, while walking to lunch, he spotted Nancy Wheeler in the hallway, her long, curly strawberry blonde hair a dead giveaway. "Hey, Nance!"
She turned and smiled. "Hey, Pacey."
"Um, I don't suppose I lucked out and you don't have a date to the Spring Formal?"
"The Spring Formal?" she said, her brows knitting with confusion. Her blue eyes twinkled playfully.
"Yeah. You know… the school gym… Friday night… seven to ten p.m. The social event of freshman year? Ringin' any bells?"
"Way to ask a girl at the last minute," she teased, acting affronted. "I feel really special, Pacey. Thanks."
He chuckled. "I know I'm cutting it kinda close, but… well, since you asked me to Sadie Hawkins, I thought I'd reciprocate. That is, if you're free?"
She shrugged. "No one's asked me."
"Really?" he said, surprised. Nancy was too pretty to not have been asked.
"Ever since I got braces last month, the boys…" Her voice trailed off. "Anyway, I was gonna skip, but if you need a date, then I'd be happy to go with you, Pacey. I mean, we had fun last time, right?"
His cheeks flushed at the memory of their kiss at the dance. "We did. Well… thanks. Okay. I'll pick up you at six-thirty on Friday."
"It's a date," she said. She gave him a dimpled, bright smile; her braces sparkled. Then they walked together towards the cafeteria.
April 10. The night of the big dance. The middle school gym was decked out with a large disco ball, twinkle lights, and streamers. It also smelled liked basketballs. The boys wore suits. The girls wore gowns and corsages. Except Joey.
"No corsage?" Pacey asked, glancing down at her wrist while they stood inside the gym. Nancy had gone to the bathroom and Dawson had gone… somewhere. He stepped further to the side, putting much-needed distance between them. She looked too pretty, and she smelled too nice.
"Dawson didn't get one," she replied, shoving down the twinge of disappointment. "It's no big deal. It's not like this is a real date."
"It's not?"
She shook her head with a frown, before forcing her mouth into a smile. "We're only here as friends."
His brows furrowed. "Really?"
"Yeah, well, what else would we be?" Embarrassed, Joey turned her face from him, avoiding his gaze. "When he asked me, he made it very clear he was just asking me as a friend. He said since we both didn't have dates, then it would be nice to go as friends. So, that also means no slow dances. His words."
Taking a deep breath, he tried not to roll his eyes. "I hope you'll have fun, at least."
Joey watched him walk away with Nancy, a frown tugging at the corners of her mouth. While Dawson chatted with some of his friends in the A/V Club, Justine Sherman walked up to her, dressed in a hot pink knee-length party dress. Her perfectly straight golden brown hair hung to her shoulders.
"Hi, Joey. Your hair looks so cute like that."
Knowing Justine was full of shit, she said nothing.
"Who did Pacey come to the dance with?"
"Nancy."
Justine smirked. "Well, can you give this to him for me?" she asked, holding out a folded note.
She didn't take it. "Give it to him yourself."
The girl let out a small gasp. "Nuh-uh, I don't wanna look like I'm coming on fast." Justine shoved the note in her hand. "Thanks, Joey."
She glared as Justine walked away to join her gaggle of friends.
A little while later, after dancing to quite a few fast songs, Joey found herself the wallflower once more while Dawson went to get her some punch. Moments later, she was joined by Pacey.
"Hey, you havin' fun?" he asked.
She watched Dawson standing over by the punch bowl, talking and smiling with Meghan Arliss, wondering if he'd forgotten about her. She sighed before putting on a fake smile. "Yeah, I'm… I am. Are you having a good time with Nancy?"
"Yeah, she's fun."
"Do you think you'll kiss her like last time?" she blurted out, and inwardly berated herself for asking the question.
"I don't know, but I've never kissed a girl with braces before, and I'm always up for trying something new," he grinned.
She forced down the twinge of jealousy before it could spread. "This is the second dance you've gone to together. So… is she gonna be your girlfriend now, or something?"
"Nancy?" he laughed. "No, it's not like that."
"What do you mean? What is it like?"
He shrugged his shoulders. "I mean, I like her. She's fun to hang around. But… I don't know. I don't… like her that way. I don't think she likes me that way either."
"But she's pretty."
"She is."
"She's nice."
He nodded. "She's very nice."
"And she's funny."
"Yeah, she's all right."
Joey didn't understand. "So, what's the problem?"
He laughed, but then his mouth curved into a frown. "You can't force yourself to feel something you don't, can you?"
"No, you can't," she said, gazing at the short brown hair that curled over his ears and forehead. Joey wanted to run her fingers through it, the impulse sudden and almost irresistible. The familiar, confusing mixture of fear and longing rose up inside her. She desperately tried to shove it down before it could turn her body into a battleground.
A fleeting thought ran through Pacey's mind and he wondered how she would react if he voiced aloud his confusing feelings about her, how they ran hot and cold and he couldn't figure them out. Sometimes he wanted to touch her, hold her hand, stroke her hair, pull her closer to him and kiss her. Other times he'd love nothing more than to push her into the creek. She could make his jaw tighten with annoyance more than anyone, and he was convinced she was the most aggravating person he'd ever known.
Still, the urge to spill his guts was suddenly overwhelming. "Um… Jo… the truth is… is that, well, I don't like Nancy… well, because—"
Just then Abby Morgan went by with a couple of her minions. "Wow, Joey. I didn't know the Salvation Army sold prom dresses," she sneered and walked off in a fit of giggles.
Her face burned and she crossed her arms in front of her chest, backing up against the wall.
Pacey hoped the disco ball fell on Abby's head. "Don't listen to her, Jo. You look pretty." He eyed her blue dress with the gauzy material. He fought to keep his gaze from going any lower than her shoulders. Her breasts had grown considerably over the past few months, and her hint of cleavage was enough to make him start sweating.
"No, I don't. My mom made this dress for Bessie when she was in high school, and my sister refitted it for me to wear. I know I look stupid."
"You don't look stupid. Didn't Dawson tell you that you look pretty?"
Joey scoffed. "He said, 'Wow, you look different.'" She rolled her eyes. Maybe if she'd also put on makeup like Bessie had insisted, Dawson might've reacted a little more in the way that she'd hoped.
He shook his head as he shoved his hands in his pockets. "You do look different, but that doesn't mean you look bad. I was serious, Jo. You look really pretty."
Blushing, she averted her eyes from his. "Thanks, Pace." Suddenly remembering the note she'd shoved in the small drawstring pouch that hung from her wrist, she reached inside and took it out.
"What's that?" Pacey asked.
"A note Justine Sherman asked me to give to you."
He reached out to take it as she started to open it and read. "'Pacey. I think you are so cute and I've been wanting to get with you. Meet me in the girls' locker room at nine o'clock and I promise you'll leave the dance satisfied.'" She laughed in shock and disbelief. "What a tramp."
He threw her a look. "Why does she have to be a tramp? Just because she wants to get with me? You're such a prude."
"And you're a pervert. She's a tramp because she's sending her vag through the mail."
"And?"
"And? She's not saying, 'I think you're a nice guy and I want to spend time with you,' she's saying, 'I wanna bone.'"
He shrugged. "At least she's honest."
"An honest two-bit floozy. But you'd probably stick your thing in anything."
He pulled a face. "My thing? I didn't know you cared so much."
"I don't," she denied, glaring at him.
"Well… whatever. See ya, Potter," he said, spotting Nancy returning to the gym from the girls' bathroom.
Joey watched him walk away, jealousy and anger swirling inside her. Then she crumpled the note in her palm and threw it in a nearby trash can.
An hour later, the DJ started spinning Savage Garden, and another slow song poured from the speakers. Pacey spun his date around. "God, this song sucks," he complained, and she laughed. "This DJ is terrible."
"You want me to ask the guy to play some Lynyrd Skynyrd?" Nancy teased.
"Almost anything would be better than this crap."
They turned on the makeshift dance floor and his eyes fell on Joey, sitting down on the bleachers, looking miserable. Pacey quickly scanned the other couples dancing, and sure enough, there was Dawson with Meghan. Again. Closing his eyes, he shook his head and clenched his teeth. What a moron.
"Uh, Nancy, do you mind if I go talk to someone for a couple minutes?" he asked, stopping their dance.
"Sure, go ahead."
"Okay, I'll come find you in a bit."
He made a beeline for Dawson, clasping him hard on the shoulder when he reached him. "Hey there, buddy," he said, interrupting the dance and pulling him away from Meghan.
"What's up, Pace?" His brows furrowed with confusion.
"Dawson, what the hell are you doin', man?"
His eyes widened. "What?"
"You've danced with Meghan the whole time, while your date is sitting over there on the bleachers. By herself."
"I've danced with Joey plenty, to all the fast songs. We agreed we just wouldn't dance together during the slow songs. It would be too weird. Besides, she doesn't even like this sort of stuff."
The obliviousness would be the death of him. Grasping his best friend's arm, Pacey turned him in the direction to face where Joey was sitting and pointed. "Look at that girl, Dawson. Does she look like she's having a good time? Does she look happy to you?"
A repentant look came over his face, and he sighed.
"Dawson, she does like this sort of stuff, and she does want to dance to the slow songs, even if she denies it. At the next slow one, if you don't ask Joey to dance, then I will," he said, making it sound like a threat, guessing that would motivate him, and then walked away.
Twenty minutes later, sure enough, the DJ announced a "throwback to 1987," which caused quite a few students to audibly groan, making Pacey laugh, and then another slow song pumped through the speakers. As he watched Dawson approach the bleachers and ask Joey to dance, feelings of relief and disappointment battled for dominance.
Shaking his head, Pacey walked over to Nancy and took her hand. "C'mon. Let's dance."
As they walked to the dance floor, Joey moved very close to Dawson, her stomach twisting with nerves. She'd never danced with a boy before, and she didn't quite know how. When they started to dance, she placed one hand on his right shoulder. Her other hand went to his as his other rested on her waist. They swayed awkwardly to the song, and as she listened to the lyrics, the song sounded sad to her. It seemed to tell the story of a man who was madly in love with a woman who didn't know he existed.
Unable to help herself, her gaze sought Pacey, knowing he probably had to be dancing among the other twosomes on the floor. It didn't take long to spot him with Nancy. They were smiling and talking and appeared to be having a good time. She couldn't help wondering what it would be like to be in Nancy's place. She forced the thought away.
"Why the long face?" Joey asked, eyeing Dawson's expression.
"Meghan's dad is being transferred to Vermont for the summer, so they'll be leaving town in June."
She fought hard to control the excitement now brewing inside her. "Really?"
"Yeah. She also thinks her parents might be getting a divorce, and isn't sure whether she'll be back in September for high school."
Could this really be true? She'd finally be able to get Dawson's attention all to herself? With no busty, flirty blonde always in the way? That she and Dawson would be able to start high school together without anyone else encroaching on their friendship? That maybe with no other girl to compete with, Dawson would finally see her for the girl she was underneath it all? That maybe he'd eventually love her the way she wanted to be loved?
"If you had come to the dance with Pacey," Dawson told her, laughing. "I bet you two would've been at each other's throats by now."
Pulled from her reverie, she looked at him with knitted brows, a sense of panic rising inside her. "Why would I have come with Pacey?" she laughed nervously, feeling caught out for some reason.
He shrugged, still chuckling. "Well, he was planning on asking you."
For a second, she felt nothing but shock. "Pacey…? Was going to ask me to the dance?"
"Yeah, he was thinking about it. But I figured you'd say no, and I felt bad that he was setting himself up for the embarrassment of rejection. And I also realized that, despite your protestations, you really did want to go to the dance. So, I decided to help my two best friends out and ask you myself. Problems solved."
"Yeah, I guess so," she chuckled. Her stomach fluttered strangely. Pacey… wanted to ask her to the dance?
"I mean, you would've said no if he'd asked you, right?" He laughed as if the very idea was ridiculous.
She looked at Dawson's face, knowing the answer he expected to hear. "Of course. Of course, I would have said no." Her stomach flipped. "Can you imagine? Me? Dance with that cretin?"
Her best friend laughed. "Thought so."
Gazing over Dawson's shoulder, she glanced up and found Pacey dancing with Nancy. He happened to glance up at the same time, and their eyes locked across the dance floor. They both started to look away, but found they couldn't. Again, their eyes met and held. There was a moment of sheer intensity as Pacey acknowledged her gaze, and Joey held her breath as though she'd been suddenly plunged into crystal clear water alive with dangerous, hard-to-resist currents. Her heart began to hammer against her ribs. Eyes locked as they danced, they moved to the beat together. Finally, as their bodies turned, they lost sight of each other.
It was after ten o'clock when Joey stood outside the school, waiting for their ride. Nancy's dad had already picked her up a few minutes before and Dawson was standing several yards away talking to Meghan.
Pacey noticed Joey watching them and frowning. "You know, Jo, maybe if you came of your shell a little, you'd get what you want."
"And what do I want?" she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Please tell me, oh wise one."
He nodded towards Dawson.
Her stomach twisted. "What makes you think I want that?"
He shook his head. Between Dawson's obliviousness and Joey's denial, he was ready to bash his skull in. "Look, Dawson is my best friend, and I care about the guy, but I also know that he's… emotionally self-indulgent," he told her, remembering a term Gretchen had used about some guy she'd dated recently. "You don't give him the kind of attention that strokes his ego. So, maybe if you weren't so angry and sarcastic all the time, and maybe tried being… I don't know, sweet, maybe, then he might give you the kind of attention you want from him."
"I didn't know you cared so much," she snapped, throwing his earlier words back at him.
"I don't," he denied.
"Good. So, did you go down to the girls' locker room with Justine?" she asked with an angry sneer.
Pacey gave her a haughty look. "None of your business."
She scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Well, I'm sure Justine kept her word and left you satisfied," she said with disgust.
"That's what you think, huh? I found Justine in the gym and told her I wasn't interested. After she told me I was the dumbest boy in Capeside, I just walked away."
"Why?"
"'Cause I won't just stick my dick in anything." His hormones may have been starting to drive him crazy to the point where he soon thought he might become desperate for a girl—any girl—but neither Justine nor Nancy were the one who affected him, who tied him into knots and got under his skin like no one else. There was only one girl in the world who did that.
As Joey let Pacey's words sink in, Mr. Leery pulled up to the curb in front of them.
2001
June 22. It was nearly midnight when Will Krudski dropped Joey off home. After thanking him for the ride, she made her way inside the house and into her bedroom. She undressed and pulled the cell phone from where she had it plugged into the outlet to charge, shut off her light, and got in bed. Then she dialed her boyfriend's number.
A thousand miles away, Pacey's heart had swelled at the sight of her name on the screen. "Hello?" he answered after the second ring.
"Hi, sweetheart."
"Hi, Jo."
"I'm a little bit drunk, Pacey."
He laughed. "Okay. What have you been up to, drunk girl?"
"Hanging out at Jack and Andie's house. Will just drove me home."
"You had fun?"
"I did. How's life in the mansion?"
Scoffing, he looked around the huge bedroom. "This place is bigger than a mansion, Jo. It's like an estate. It's forty-five thousand square feet. There's over thirty rooms. It's got ten bedrooms. It was nice of them to shove me in one and let me stay here."
Just the sound of his voice was heating her blood, and the conversation inside Andie's bedroom rushed forward in her mind. But so did embarrassment. "Shove you?"
He chuckled. "Well, I am the hired help. They could've just left me on the boat. I might've preferred the boat, actually."
"But you get to cook in the huge, fancy kitchen. And swim in their Olympic-sized pool. And go bowling in their very own alley with shoes and balls and everything. I bet they even have matching shirts with everyone's names embroidered on them. Oh, have you decided to take up tennis yet?" She snorted.
He laughed breathlessly at the slight slurring of her words. "How much did you have to drink tonight, Jo?"
"Just some spiked punch. A few cups. I lost count, but that's it. I was a lot drunker earlier. Most of it's worn off." She paused. "Well… some of it."
"Okay," he laughed.
"Anyway, I'm sure it's not so bad hanging out with rich folks all day."
"I'd rather hang out with you."
Sadness and longing welled up inside her. "I miss you, Pace."
Frowning, he sighed. "I miss you, too, Jo. I wish I was there with you."
Her mouth went dry and she swallowed. "I… I wish you were here, too."
Silence stretched out between them, and she suddenly felt like she could combust. It was a different kind of warmth than the alcohol in her blood. Phone sex wasn't something she'd ever imagined she'd do. After all, she'd never really had to think about it before. But they were apart now, and they were on the phone a lot. She wanted to go for it, but the embarrassment was painful.
But… what the hell?
"What would you be doing if you were here?"
The way she'd asked the question, the tone of her voice, made his body react. His blood warmed. His groin tightened. There was definitely something playful in her voice, sexual. Pacey licked his lips and decided to act unaware. "Well, I suppose I'd be in your room, having this conversation in person."
She rolled her eyes, feeling like an idiot. Maybe now just wasn't the right time. "I have to get up so early tomorrow," she groaned, thinking of the morning and the guests she had to cook breakfast for. "Why did I stay out so late? And I'm not even that tired. I feel like I got my second wind just when I should be sleeping."
"If I was there, I'd know how to make you sleepy," he said huskily, lowering his voice.
Her cheeks flushed hot, and Joey had to purse her lips hard to prevent an embarrassing squeak from escaping her throat. "Yeah," she choked.
"I could make you sleepy now…"
She was dying inside. Could she really do this? Lust coursed through her veins along with the alcohol. "Since you're so good with words, you probably could…" She sighed. "I know it hasn't even been two weeks since you left, but this is already so hard."
"It's been rough on me, too. As soon as I get back, we're gonna take a few days and lock ourselves away from the world."
"I'm gonna hold you to that, Pacey."
"Trust me, Jo. World War Three couldn't stop me from doing what I want to do to you when I get home."
The muscles in the pit of her stomach tightened. She could feel her warm center becoming slick with desire. She wanted to be bold and just go for it. God, why was this so difficult? Why should she feel embarrassed? It was just Pacey. "What are you wearing right now?"
He chuckled. "My boxers."
"That's it?"
"That's it. What are you wearing?"
"One of your old Bruins T-shirts," she replied in a flirtatious tone. "And that's it."
Her words sent a jolt of desire straight to his cock, and Pacey groaned. "You know what seeing you in my clothes does to me." He could hear her breath quickening, and his face flushed hot. "Are you… are you touching yourself, Joey?"
Her entire body coiled tight. "No, but… I want to."
"What's stopping you?"
"Well… I don't know. I mean, if you're not comfortable with—"
"Are you kidding me, Potter? You think I don't want to listen to you get off?"
She laughed. "Well, when you put it that way."
He passed the phone to his right hand and then palmed the growing erection tenting his boxers. "I know my voice can help get you there…"
Unable to stop herself, she whimpered. "I really wish you were here, Pacey."
"I'd climb through your window, and find you there on the bed," he spoke huskily as he freed his arousal from his boxers and gripped the thick base of his shaft. "And you'd be wet and ready for me."
Her eyes rolled and she palmed an aching breast through his shirt. "Tell me… tell me what you'd do."
He grinned into the phone. "Well, the first thing I'd do is get you out of that T-shirt."
She bit her bottom lip, fighting a smile, and then reached for the hem and pulled it over her head, tossing it to the floor. "Shirt's off. Now what would you do?" she panted.
"Eager, are we?" he laughed.
"Don't tease me."
"But I love teasing you."
She took a deep breath, relaxing against the pillow.
He stared at the erection in his firm grip, willing himself not to stroke his cock yet, wanting to her to come first. "I want to get on the bed with you. I'd kiss you, kiss your neck."
She groaned, and he hummed in agreement.
"Then I'd run my tongue from that hollow in your throat all the way to your breasts."
"Yes," she gasped, her fingers following his spoken path. She ran her finger around her hard nipple, and made a low noise, arching her back at her own touch. "My nipples are so hard right now. I wish your mouth was on them."
He groaned, and a bead of precum appeared at the tip of his cock. "I love your breasts, Jo," he murmured, and she smiled. "I love the feel of them against my hands, my tongue. You taste so sweet. I love everything about your body. How soft your breasts are when I hold you close, and how wet you are when I touch your pussy."
She gasped, and then moaned as the desire deep in her belly coiled tighter, the sensitive flesh between her legs burned hotter. "Yes, that's it. Keep talking."
His cock twitched, and the bead of precum rolled down the rigid length of his arousal. Still, he gripped the base tightly, fighting off the urge to stroke himself to climax. Not yet. "Jo, you sound amazing. I love your little sounds, your breathy moans. I'd love to be there watching you. Are you touching yourself?"
"Yes." She nodded as she kneaded her breasts, rubbed her fingers back and forth over her nipples, pinched them, wishing it was his hands instead. "Keep talking. Tell me what you'd do."
He smiled and licked his lips. "I'd kiss and lick and suck your nipples until I had you pleading for more. I love the way you squirm and move under me. The way your body arches up when something feels good, the way your hips thrust up to meet mine as if you can't help it, the way your body begs for my hard cock."
Joey's eyes rolled, and her hips arched, and she couldn't take it anymore. Her fingers pinched at her nipple, and she moaned, louder this time, and slid her hand down over her stomach.
"Tell me what you're doing to yourself, Jo." His voice had lowered, and it was almost a growl, tight with need. "Are you touching your pussy? Are you wet for me right now?"
She nodded despite the fact he couldn't see her, and she closed her eyes. Her fingers slid into her folds, gathering her wetness, and then touched her swollen clit, lust surging through her veins. "I am so wet, Pacey. I wish you were here to feel it."
He closed his eyes and pictured Joey touching herself, palming at her breasts, her fingers between her legs. He finally started to stroke himself, slowly, eliciting a groan from his lips. He wasn't gonna last long. "Fuck, sweetheart. I wish I was there to watch you. Do you wanna come already?"
"Please," she whimpered. "Please make me come, Pacey."
"Oh, baby," he choked.
"You're close too, aren't you? I can tell when the baby talk starts," she giggled, and then realized something that hadn't occurred to her until just now. "You're touching yourself, too?"
"Uh… yeah."
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"Because I want to focus on you."
She smiled, closing her eyes, thinking of his perfect cock, his beautiful hand stroking it, and her clit throbbed. "Are you hard?"
"I'm so fucking hard right now. I wanna touch you, but what I really want is to taste you."
"Yes," she breathed, her fingers moving over her needy clit.
"Know what I want more than anything, Jo?"
Oh, his voice… his voice was like heaven. "What?" she whimpered.
"I want your perfect little clit in my mouth. I want to lick it and suck on it, play with it, feel it throb against my tongue as you come all over my face. And I want to stay there until you're so sensitive you have to push me away."
"Pacey," she whined, arching off the bed. Her body felt as if on fire. "I need you inside me so bad."
Stroking himself harder, he focused on her sweet sounds, her moans and whimpers. He loved it. He missed the softness of her skin, the way it glowed as she threw her head back and cried out in ecstasy.
"Think of me, inside you. I know you like it when I'm behind you, Jo. The way I hold onto you while I fuck you. The way I fill you up and hit that sweet spot inside your pussy every time I thrust. The way I reach around and touch your clit, making you come on my big, hard cock over and over again."
"Oh, my God, Pacey." Her fingers moved faster and she started to feel the pleasure building inside her, a trembling rush that wasn't going to wait much longer.
"I love being inside you, Joey. The way your pussy grips my cock like it doesn't ever want to let go. Feeling connected, feeling like we're two halves of the whole, like we're one person with two hearts, and nothing could ever tear us apart."
Her heart swelled with emotion. Leave it to Pacey to say something so sweet and romantic, and so hot at the same time. "I love you so much, sweetheart."
He growled low in his throat, clenching his jaw and squeezing his eyes shut. He started pumping his erection vigorously. With each hard stroke, he remembered how Joey felt beneath him, above him, her tight, wet pussy gripping his cock, milking him. He felt her soft skin pressed against his. He saw the sweat forming at her brow as she shook and moaned his name.
"Come for me, Joey. I wanna hear you come for me right now."
The command in his voice only made her eyes roll, and she whined pitifully, needing that last push to send her over the edge.
"I'm close just thinking of you lying there, touching yourself, getting off to my voice."
"I want it. I need it."
"I'm picturing your naked body, the way your fingers would slide and stroke over your…" He trailed off suddenly, breathing heavily.
"Naughty girl."
That did it. All rational thought fled her brain. "Oh fuck," Joey groaned, the tension bursting, and she was coming. As the orgasm surged through her body with throbbing pleasure, her entire core convulsed with the power of it, electricity tingling down her legs to her feet, making her toes curl. She pressed her fingers hard against her clit and she hit another peak, coming a second time, unable to stifle the loud keening moan.
Her sounds triggered his own visceral response. Pacey groaned as his balls tightened, and a knot of white-hot need coiled at the base of his spine, spreading to the pit of his stomach. His hips rocked upward with each stroke, pushing his cock through the tight circle of his fist. He swiped his thumb over the sensitive head of his thick shaft, now leaking with precum, hissing at the pleasurable sensation, and moved his hand faster. He could sense his imminent release, the tension in his balls building until he couldn't take the pressure. Then the fire raced up his cock, and he was moaning her name as he came all over his hand and stomach.
Joey was the first to break the long, blissful silence with a soft, breathless laugh. "I knew you'd be good at that."
Pacey couldn't help the smug smile that spread across his face. "Now I really wish you were here, Jo," he sighed. "You could have gotten me a washcloth."
She started giggling. "I'm sorry. Did you make a mess?"
"Only of myself. Not these expensive sheets, thank Christ. That would've been embarrassing."
They excused themselves, telling each other to hold on a minute while they each ran to the bathroom. They soon returned to their beds and cell phones. Then they both sighed, and there was a sadness to it, the distance between them somehow augmented even more now.
"I love you, Pacey. And I miss you so much I can't stand it."
"I miss you, too, Jo. And I love you."
"I don't want to get off the phone. I want to fall asleep listening to your voice."
"Okay."
Joey smiled and curled up, tucking the phone between her ear and the pillow. "You got any more Chef Mao stories?"
Laughing, Pacey then breathed a happy sigh. "I've got tons."
A/N: For those who may have felt this was over the top and too raunchy or this fic didn't even need a phone sex scene in it, then please take up your concerns with Ella10104 on Twitter. It's entirely her fault, and I will not be taking criticism on this topic. Conversely, if you're happy that I included the phone sex scene, then you can also give Ella your thanks. I wasn't even planning on including any smut in P/J's summer apart. So, there you have it.