What We Do In The Shadows: "Jen..."
Summary: There are unexpected consequences when Laszlo seeks a new human familiar...
Part LXXXV…
The Cravenswood-Relentless Estate…
Evening of the 26th…
A couple of landscaping trucks pulling out, the crews, hired by Jennifer, quite unharmed…
Though a few rather puzzled by the transplanted topiary pieces one of the new owners had selected to transport from their old residence.
Doesn't that look like a…? One asking his coworker as they pulled out, her frowning answer to get his mind outta da gutter.
Inside the main house, Laszlo Cravensworth standing before the giant screen of their home theater system…His proud image projected on said screen in startling clarity as Jacqueline in her maid's outfit points video camera.
Laszlo beaming at his image then at Jennifer and Erika fussing about him as Nadja on couch frowns…
Hmmn…
"You should pull the corset tighter, Erika…His stomach still bulges too much."
"Really?" Laszlo eyes himself on screen…Thought I look quite the distinguished author/lordly landowner/captain of industry, retired/retired military fellow…
As I've said a bit of prosperity poundage not at all a negative in my day…And most of what I know of human history…
Nice way to get round the difficulty with mirrors, eh?…He notes to the camera crew. "Wonderful idea of my Jennifer's…"
Jennifer blushing as she carefully eyes the hair style she and Erika had been fussing with…Yeah…We'll use a bit of mousse tomorrow but it's good…
Master Laszlo…Fond embarrassed look.
"Dear, I think it's quite all right…" he shakes head to Nadja who gives sour look. "Besides…Any tighter and I'll belch up whatever I eat before and during the party. All over my lovely new suit and probably our new white rugs and white…White, dear heart, I remind you…Couch."
Eh… "Fine, but you look like overstuffed and beached whale…"
"I can have the tailor let out another inch or so…" Erika suggests, walking round. "Though if I may say so, mein Master…Mistress. I think you look magnificent in your tux." She beams.
"You do, Master." Jen nods happily. "So distinguished…Really, doesn't he, Mistress Nadja?" turning to the frowning Nadja.
"He's looked worse…" she shrugs. "I suppose it's not too bad…But go ahead and have tailor open it in suit an inch for waist and shoulders, Erika."
Cut to Laszlo on couch a bit later, still in tuxedo pants and white shirt with raised collar though minus suit, now borne off by Erika for alteration…
"I had considered wearing my old Crimean War uniform…Still have it, packed away…To match Nandor's Ottoman…After all we were allies during that one. But Dr. Chu, Jen's husband, isn't wearing his so I agreed to the tuxado…Oh? Right, tuxedo. Which is quite handsome."
Devastating…Nadja, in chair, breathes. And when I, a vampire breath in admiration it means something…
But no chance in Hell will I tell him that…Especially with my Soul companion watching. Or, rather, leering… Frowns at the Doll now on couch beside Laszlo.
"How did she get there? Jennifer?" Nadja, glaring, waving for Jen to remove the Doll who eyes camera with lewd grin.
"Sorry, ma'am. Can't you behave a little?" Jen hissing to the leering Doll as she scoops her up and sets on another chair.
"Very little…" grin by the Doll. "My Laszlo, you look like a prince, even without fine suit." Nodding.
"My Prince!" Nadja glares.
"I would share…" the Doll shrugs. "But, fine… 'Your Prince'. But tell him how fine he looks, our honey bear."
"And do not forget this…" Nadja, sternly, ignoring the injunction.
"I take orders from no one, including my counterpart essence." The Doll, disdainful look and wave of hand.
"Jacqueline!" Nadja cried.
"To the furnace, ma'am?" Jacqueline moving to seize the Doll from chair…
"Eh, no…Just get the bitch from Purgatory out of here… Put her somewhere uncomfortable."
Hmmn…Jacqueline…Jennifer…Nadja ponder.
In this magnificent place, tres difficile…
"I know…Put her in Colin Robinson's room!" triumphant leer at the annoyed Doll.
"Bitch." As Jacqueline takes her up. Jacqueline then pausing to give slightest of smiles to camera as the Doll goes limp in her grip.
"Right away, ma'am." Hurrying off.
"That'll do for her." Nadja, nodding regally. "Now…If Lord Cravensworth of Cravenswood has stroked his ego enough in front of our minions…" Lazslo rolling eyes to Erika's sympathetic look.
"I've your gown all ready, Mistress Nadja." Jennifer beams, pulling up a rather astonishing black sequined formal gown with red threading. "Ginny dropped it off an hour ago."
…
Jacqueline to the two members of the camera crew following her, the Doll in her hand, smiling at camera as she pauses a moment… "I expect you gentlemen and lady will act with the discretion here. I am after all the counterpart of the…Person…You have an agreement with…" eyeing them.
"Besides is a good story, no? The Soul of Mrs. Cravensworth in minion Miss Jacqueline for a bit. Only a bit, I promise you." Pausing… "Though it is rather nice to have corporeality again…" wan smile, pat of her frizzled black hair. "Yes…Very nice…" grin, eyeing her chest as best she could. "But no, I am seeking Redemption for us both and making the whoopie with Lazslo in this poor thing's body would not quite…" shrug. "Though I am not saying I wouldn't love to…" grin, then a sigh.
"I just don't trust that Colin Robinson. He is up to something, I am sure. I have the instinct on these things, being of the Roma."
And a disembodied Soul/Ghost, yes…Nodding to a question.
"No." sour stern look. "I cannot answer that question, sirs. You must forgive me. Why am I here and just what role we the Souls are playing will be answered, in time. Though like my counterpart, I am sure you have guessed some of it. But I'd better get on with this. No doubt now she is fine lady and powerful vampire, Nadja Counterpart is a bitch about being served quickly. Come…" she urges.
"The poor girl…This one I mean…" she indicates herself as she descends the rather fine if minor staircase to the vast basement area. "Her soul is quite out of sorts…A bit zany, you know. She is largely hiding, really, in some sort of dream state where she feels safe, I suppose. No wonder she's been such subordinate type. Quite off her rocker as you say now, really…A very troubled girl. Much with the buried guilt…" She opens door to the basement level…
"Oh. Such a palace of a place…But really far superior to any I ever heard of or my counterpart encountered in her wanderings…" she peers round in wonder. "Lets see, where is that beige little monster's room? Come, Jacqueline…" she urges herself. "You've been down here cleaning and fetching for them. Ah, yes." Nod. "Thank you."
"Mr. Robinson?" polite call in Jacqueline's voice, none of the trace of accent of a moment ago. "Mistress Nadja wanted me to leave something with you!" she calls to Colin's storage room/bedroom door.
"Good…Not here from his work yet." She pauses then enters.
"Disgusting…" looking round. "So arrogant in his beige, miserably cramped, life-draining way, in a lovely place like this. He could easily…" she sets the Doll on a cold metal chair, then peers at a small photo on his nightstand.
"Well, this is interesting. Why should a creature like him keep an old picture…Himself and who is this…? Yes, woman?" she eyes camera, holding up photo. "No idea?"
"So, he must have cared for someone…Once." She sets photo down. Oh my…She eyes herself in mirror… "She is a pretty little one…" Turning at question…
"Oh, no…Colin Robinson is not included in those selected for rescue in our effort… I don't mean to be cruel, peoples." Sheepish nod. "No…" shrug. "It is his own matter and not for me to say. No, not simply that he is different in his vampiral form. That's not what denies him his hope. Perhaps one day, but he's shown no sign of recovering his humanity as the others have. The fault lies in ourselves, you know?"
"Oh, yes." She nods at question. "Your friends, our counterparts, have very much shown this." Firm stare… "You must be aware of it…How human they've become, even in the short time you have followed them…I'd better return, Nadja will come looking for me. Out of both annoyance and…" smile. "Concern…"
Nodding head slightly… "Yes, we are blessed in our counterparts…Our hopes of escape from the Limbo we three remain trapped in all depend on their good hearts. As did poor Vlad of the Dracule and his dear wife…"
Good hearts for vampires, naturally…shrug. One must speak relatively here, no?
"And more I cannot say…" staring at her hands. "This woman is lucky in her way to be so…Lost…And free in her sad, crazed way…Oh…" shakes herself. "I must be careful…This is the addictive…And we must get back." She eyes the Doll. "Come and see how good actress I am…" smile. "It's a trait of my people as Nadja would tell you." Sigh.
"Hopefully she will relent before Colin Robinson returns and send me to get her. I should not like to have to return to her in here, with him." She turns to eye one crew member.
"Oh, yes…I think he is so bad…" calm stare. "Ah…'Is that why?'…" she smiles at question…And at the reasonably good-looking questioner. "I cannot answer that, clever young man. But there are several reasons I am here. Come, my 'Mistress' will be anxious."
…
Zeller Properties…
"Mom?" Eloise "Ellie" Zeller, twenty-year old pretty, blondish college student in somewhat preppy pale blouse and dark skirt eyes the camera crew in her mother's office. "Is this a government thing? Are they asking about Dad? I'm not sayin' anything about him…"
"It's nothing to do with your Dad, Ellie." Ginny sighs. "My client Mr. Cravensworth has these guys follow him for a book and documentary project. I agreed to let them film here regards the work we've been doing for him and his friends. Don't worry about it."
"I don't wanna be in this…Can't they leave?" frown at the camera.
"Jacque? Can you take your sis out for a mo while the guys finish with me?" Ginny turns to an amused Jacqueta.
"Sure. Come on, Ellie. Ma will finish up and we can go have dinner."
"This is crazy…Weird." Ellie frowns, shaking head at camera. "I didn't sign a release, you guys. Don't put me in this…"
"I'll take care of it, honey. Just go wait outside a minute." Ginny urges.
"Sorry about that, guys…Miss." She sheepishly eyes camera after the two girls have left. "Ellie takes after me, I guess." Shrug, wan smile. "But isn't she a lovely girl? It was so kind of Mistress Nadja to take such an interest in her. Saved her life, I'd say. Or at least got her back on the right track." Fond smile.
"Of course, I know I owe Master Lazslo and Master Nandor my thanks too. They did the work of hypnotizing the dean and that jerk kid. Got her out of the worst of it and that jerk out of her life…And I am truly grateful." Beam. "Wish I could tell El whom and what she owes her second chance to…Well, perhaps one day she'll have the chance to serve them…"
Eyeing the crew… "I guess you folks think that's a bit…" sheepish shrug. "But I owe everything to the Mistress and our Overlords…I mean apart from my life to my Mistress…She and they freed me from my obsession with this place, with success…Money, really…To the point of not caring about much else…" smile… "Of course, while dropping quite a fortune in my and Jen Steinecke's laps and getting Jackie Williams out of my hair. Though I don't wish Jackie ill, you should know. I even hope she and Roy can find a little happiness, in time." Earnest look. "I hope to be happy with Rick, do well by my girls and by my people here, at last. And better than I ever did before. And that's all thanks to our Mistress and Overlords, bless 'em." Cocks head to camera's view. "And you know, in a few days, I get to be 'mistress' of sorts of the Cravenswood-Relentless Estate." Smile.
"Not that I would ever supplant Mistress Nadja there." Anxious look. "I only mean I'll do all I can to keep the place up and in a way she'd find suitable until she can return in safety." Nod.
"But it is very kind of her and the others to let the place to me. Rick is gonna be blown away. He loves the place for its history. And to have it to live in, as caretakers, sorta, for free? Apart from some maintenance costs, natch…" she shakes head. "I think Jaqueta loves the place, though I know she and Ellie have their own lives to lead until such time as they're required to take over my service…A day that might never come though I'm glad they're around to serve if needed." Shrug to camera. "Sorry but that's how I feel and I am their mother…It's really not…" slight annoyance at one crew member.
"Ok…" she nods to the director's intervention. "Just…These are my girls…It's our lives. And you folks are supposed to be objective, right? I mean, if any of you can't be…" Cool stare… "Ok." Renewed nod. "It's fine, we're good. And I appreciate how you guys have helped in all this. I haven't forgotten you probably saved my life and maybe the Mistress' when Devious first came to see me. Just try to accept that my Mistress comes first with me. And that she has my and my girls' best interests at heart. You ought to know that by now." Careful nod. "She's shown it so often. But ok…And we'd best finish up. Even Jacque will be getting impatient. Was there anything else you needed from me?"
She nods at the director's query…
"No…We are following my Lady's and the Masters' commands. Watch but don't engage at the reception. And be light, bright, and friendly human friends of the Overlords. Well, friends of the Cravensworths and Mr. Relentless, our dear, utterly human clients and treasured, dearly so, new friends. I'm actually looking forward to meeting the Draculas…Acuras…" giggle. "Jen's right. It does sound like a bad horror movie." Grin… "Honestly…We're pledged to be peaceable, tomorrow night at least. So long as they are." Nod. "And it seems they mean to be. It should be a very nice time. You know my Jacque is thinking about medical school, it'll be nice for her to speak to Dr. Acura." Grin. "Bet he could really smooth a way for her." Arch raise of eyebrows…
"And Gui…Our dear, sweet…Wealthy as Croesus, now, according to Susie, lucky girl…" grin. "Is coming home with Phyl…His surprise secret agent…" shakes head. "I shoulda guessed but I suspect it wasn't Gui who called her in there…" smile. "And Susan, his declared…To his whole family, at the aunt's funeral, intended. Good for them." Smiling nod. "Sue is a great girl and will keep even the Boss on his toes. I know Master Nandor is thrilled, he was pulling for them." Sigh, slight wince. "I guess this is a little hard on Phyl. I know she was gaga over the Boss and I get it." Winsome smile. "I mean I'm so glad to have Rick and that the Mistress and Master Lazslo like him, but I am fond of Guillermo too…We all are, now we can properly appreciate him. Just that I get what Phyllis is going through, that's all."
"Though it's something special that she went to Mexico, to look after him. And I know whatever the Boss claims now about arranging for her to come, she was the instigator there…" smile. "What? Colin said that, did he? A real expert on thrall and such, huh?" Wry smile. "Well, maybe he's right. I dunno as to that. I guess he'd have the expertise there…Oh? He doesn't thrall people? At all? Well, at least he's seen enough of the others' at work to know, I suppose." Eyeing the crew member repeating Colin's lectures on thrall…Specifically regarding…
"Did he? So, I 'slip around Nadja…My Lady's…Commands', eh?" slight frown…Then sudden anxiety… "It is true I did once say I didn't think we ought to kill ourselves but I only meant…I mean I thought it would put the Mistress at risk…" slight nervous look. "I'd never refuse a command…Or deny my Lady anything…" nod at comment. "Well, sure…I get that…It's nice we can still be practical and we have been, I hope. You can love someone and still see…" pauses. "But I'd die for Nadja, I'd sacrifice my own daughters for her…I'd kill for her…" anxious look, then calming as she stares at the camera and crew.
"Well…Lets leave it there, right?" nods. "Though, you know…You guys never did answer my question…About my being a monster now?" winsome look. "Thanks…" shrug to comment… "But 'it's not your fault' isn't exactly no, is it?" wan smile.
"I'd better go to my girls. You guys can always reach me later…I'm 24/7 as to service for them, you know." Ginny, rising. Eyeing the sheepishly patting hand of one of the crew, the woman pulling back at the director's look…
"Thanks." Nod.
…
The old Residence…Or, Devious Abbey, as the new owner likes to put it…
Simon, expansively seated in his favorite swivel chair turning to face Samarta's video camera…
"At last, here I am. Dark Lord of all I survey…" he intones. "In my new seat of power, my dominion over yet another island established for all time to come!"
Cackling…
Yeah, sure…Todd, Rappula, Samarta, various others, minus the bad-backed vampire who's found Colin's old bed in his old room a delightful therapy for his back pain…
Tell that to Mayor DeBiasio or Governor Cuomo…
Or even the borough president here…
Though there it is true the fix is in…As far as our real estate deals…
But hardly "dominion"…Samarta, suppressing frown…
Still, the more film the more story…The bigger the scoop when I make my pitch to the Post. And a vainglorious supervillain vamp is sure to be a draw here.
Washington, I mean…No mere rag for this gem.
I wonder if I should also "scoop" some of him…Keep a bit in an urn or something just as a little sign of respect to the guy who got me back in the world and my career. But lets not put the horse before the chariot…
Though heck…I see a movie here, down the road. With quite a role for the intrepid reporter who broke the tale, at nearly Immortal cost…
"Samarta? Keep up if you would?" Simon frowns. "You're supposed to be interactive here…Next question?"
"Sorry, boss. Yeah, ummn…So, Mr. Devious, Dark Lord of Manhattan and Staten Island…What's your next brilliant move in your brilliantly Evil plan?" she reads from script.
Right…
"Glad you asked, Humanity." Simon nods, leaning back in chair. "Our 'friends and allies', the skunks, were doubtless lying when they claimed to be moving to Manhattan…At least to the location they claimed. None of my spies…Human or vampiral…Including my special and silent partner…Can confirm this."
"Some 'partner'…Special or silent…" Todd frowns.
"Cut! How many times must I tell you people not to interrupt my monologues!" Simon rages. "Though good point Todd, clearly Colin Robinson does know where he and the others have gone, but he prefers to dole out intel in his own way."
Ummn… "Samarta? You might want to erase that last bit…No…" he shook head. "Keep it. The world should know who labored with me to save and damn our dear colleagues."
And that's a wrap, far as I'm concerned…Thanks Boss. She thought…
Not that I'd ever have erased that little tidbit of useful intel…
Only questions now being…
Whom do I sell to who'll offer me what I want without staking first and asking questions about my motives later? The Hunters might offer me a crack at the Redemption bus but Lesley'll be trying to monitor them and they're not likely to pay well if at all…Nor are likely to let me keep exclusive rights to the story, wanting to keep their activities secret. The Post will want more confirmation than just my popping fangs and probably can't help me on the regaining Humanity front…
The Cravensworths and Nandor the Relentless and their enthralled crew would hand me over to Simon…
No, I need someone who could protect me and who'll believe, and want the tale, but without an emotional stake, here…Sorry…
Of course reserving the print rights at least to me…
And then how quick can I find some excuse to hand the rest of this nonsense over to Todd and slip out…
…
Cut to Colin on bus several hours later as he heads home…
"So that old vampiress of Simon's is in touch with you guys? And is offering her own footage on Devious to add to your documentary? Sweet. A real potential money-maker there. She what? She wants what?" he blinks, shaking head.
"What the hell is wrong with vampires these days?" frown. "Dracula, William the Bloody, Angelus, Fred the Beguiler, Ruth, that old friend of Nadja's, The Exterminator…Has everyone gone soft in the head? Where's the pride in being Immortal and murderous?" shakes head. "Of course, I do have the advantage…Daylight walker, can eat human if I choose…Don't go poof if you stake me and even when young enough to bleed on wood contact, we're hard to kill…"
"What?" grim look.
"That's ridiculous…Why would I partner with Simon Devious? The guy's a posturing turd. What would I have to gain? He said that? Well, so why haven't I told him where they are?" thin smile.
"You want me to drain you all dry?" dark look. "I can kill you all you know and it'll look like a nice series of massive heart attacks. Well, you keep to our agreement…Our individual motives and what we discuss is strictly between us and your camera till this thing's completed. But remember, I can find you and kill you any time."
Reflective pause…
"Still, it would be nice to have a little record of the why and whats to watch after I've triumphed…But I'll answer what I choose and if you're not happy with that…"
One member of crew starts going into cardiac arrest…
"She'll be fine. She's only thirty." He grins as the woman is helped back by a crew person.
"I'll give you one answer now…" hard stare. "I haven't told Simon about the new place because I don't want it violated by his crew. He'd get all territorial and possessive and send in his people and of course be trying to get that damned fool witch's hat, assuming Lazslo brought it, which of course he did. No, that's strictly for the Vampire Hunters and their little slayer, Ms. Acura to know of. Bring Simon's people in and our friends might die fighting Evil to save their little human pets. Oh, no. No way."
Archly grim look at camera…
"What you know, you know…And I suggest you keep it to yourselves. Guess all you like as to why I'd want to interfere with this Redemption gig. Maybe I just care too much for my friends and roomies to see them shunted off to Hell to make way for their wuss souls." Thin smile.
"Or…Not. My business. And besides…Would I want Simon's gang mucking up my pool?"