I had realized that her death was a week before Christmas. A WEEK. No way was I going to be in the Christmas spirit or wanna celebrate the Christmas holiday.

Throttle noticed that I was not in a good mood. He knew it was a week before Christmas and didn't bother to ask why the Christmas decorations weren't up yet.

"You ok, love?"

I looked at him with tears streaming down my face. I shook my head no. He had no idea how close I was with Charley. I had been friends with her while I was in the Marines.

"I know you and Charley were close, so I'll understand if you wanna stay somewhere else for a while. All I ask is that you text me in the mornings and before you go to bed."

I had wiped the tears from my face.

"I don't know what I wanna do right now. I mean besides waiting for her body to show up at the garage. I feel like I had failed her as a friend. She was there for me when you left the first time. I should have been there for her. I'm a horrible friend."

Throttle grabbed my hands with his and pulled me close to him. I hugged him tightly, but not real tight where I cause him to choke. He knew I didn't really mean what I said about being a horrible friend. He knew that was the grief talking.

He felt his shoulder get wet and knew I had been crying again. Throttle knew that just being there for me was enough. He couldn't think of anything that would get him smacked if he said the wrong thing. Throttle figured it was better to just stay quiet and be there for me.

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The next couple of days I spent at the garage helping out Fourby and Christina. Nosedive had also noticed I wasn't myself. He stopped what he was doing and asked me what was wrong.

"Do you remember my friend, Charley? I had introduced her and everyone to the team years ago."

"Yeah, I remember. What about her?"

"She committed suicide a few days ago. I'm waiting for the delivery of her body and for everyone else to show up so we can have her funeral."

"I didn't know she had passed away. I've been helping out Christina and Fourby this whole time. I'm so sorry, Mike. Is there anything I can do?"

"I'd like you to be there at the funeral. It'll be up to you if you wanna say something at the funeral. I do want you to dress in a suit."

"Of course. I have no qualms about wearing a suit. Wing ever tell you about the undercover mission Grin and I were on?"

"Nope. You have any pics of that mission?"

"Actually, I do. Since moving from the Pond, I've kept all my things in the Migrator."

"Even though both Fourby and Christina are allowing you to live in the loft above the garage?"

"I have too much stuff, so I keep it all in the Migrator."

"Tell ya what, Dive. You can keep some of your things at my place. Like your Ducks uniform, if you want."

"I'd like to put my bro's uniform in your closet, if possible. If that's ok, I mean."

"Of course you can. I have no problem with that."

"What about your husband?"

"Not his place to question what goes in the closet. I'll just put it there."

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Later in the day, Charley's body arrived in the cryogenic chamber. The people who delivered her body also said they have a casket for her too.

"I told your boss I will have a casket made for her."

"I'm aware, ma'am, but this is what was sent with your friends' body. It was free of charge, too."

"If it was free of charge, then I'll use it. Let's see it."

We walked over to the back of the truck and I looked at the casket. It was beautiful. A black walnut casket with a beautiful baby blue lining.

"If she was alive, she'd love it. It's beautiful."

"I'm glad you do. I'm sorry for your loss."

"Thank you."

I watched the delivery guy leave, then I pushed the cryogenic chamber into the garage until later this week.

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The following day, I spent some time at the garage helping out Christina and Fourby. I was working on the books in the back office when someone came into the garage asking for me. Christina knocked on the office door, then opened it.

"I'm sorry to disturb you, Michelle, but there's someone here asking for you by name."

"What's his name?"

"He said his name is John. Said he's an old friend of yours."

I thought for a few mins., then it hit me. The guy I had been seeing yrs. Ago when I left Throttle.

"Tell him I'll be right out. I need to finish this up. Thanks Christina."

Christina nodded then closed the door behind her and went to tell John that Michelle would be out soon.

About 15 mins. later, I came out of the back office and walked up to John.

"Hey John. What's up?"

"Hey. I was wondering if you wanted to go get a cup of coffee with me and catch up on old times?"

"Sure. Mind riding on my bike?"

"I don't have a helmet."

"I do." Then I handed him my spare helmet.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

After we left the garage on my bike, we headed for a coffee shop to talk. I had told him that we can't see each other again since I got back with Throttle.

Then I realized that if Throttle finds out, he could actually sign the divorce papers AND file them with the court. I could lose my family….or, he could want John to have a 3some with us.

"I know what you said, but I had to see you again."

"You do realize that if my husband finds out that I had cheated on him while separated, he could actually divorce me. I can't lose him right now. We just lost a good friend, so you showing up is bad timing. I'm sorry, John."

"Don't be. I'm sorry for your loss, though."

"Thanks. If you'd like to meet everyone, we can stop by the house."

"If you don't mind?"

"Not at all. I think you'll like my husband. Real easy going guy, when he's in a good mood."