* Yoko Kanno – Little Black Book

* Higanbana – Savon de Fleur

* The House in Fata Morgana – Girlhood in Shambles

* Umineko – Answer

* Yoko Kanno – Little Black Book

In the end, Hatsuyo had made it into the Clock Tower as a student.

Up until the very end, a doubt had always subsisted in her mind; she wouldn't have been surprised if this had all turned out to be an elaborated joke. She had met the overseer mentioned in her father's letter and had gotten her help. That was a miracle in itself, considering they owed her nothing and she had shown up out of the blue. Or was that benevolence or whatever? Hatsuyo didn't really believe in it; why would anyone help her out of the goodness of their heart?

At any rate, so began the one year she would end up spending at the Clock Tower.

Of course, only she had known she would be going to a school for magi. As far as her foster family knew, she was going to study oversea in some British university with a fancy name. They didn't question it, even though it happened so suddenly. They must have been relieved to know she was leaving. That was the least she could do for them.

On the other hand, this had to be the most reckless things she had ever done. She had no idea how to survive on her own in another country, no idea what would be waiting for her and she didn't have so much as a plan. The only thing she had going for her was that her English was correct, one of the few benefits from her mindless studying.

That and the fact she wasn't afraid.

There was one thing she understood as soon as her studies began, however: magi were a nasty bunch. Back in her home country, she had never paid much attention to those around her; people were reserved and didn't have that much personality. While that certainly wasn't the case here, she learned how much better it would have been compared to a world made of pricks. The teachers were assholes and their students were assholes-in-training.

It wasn't active bullying as she was used to. Instead, people were openly disdainful and would either ignore her completely or make sure she understood how much they looked down on her. She had never planned to get along with them anyway, so it wasn't like she cared.

It was annoying though.

She didn't get good results most of the time. That was definitely something new for her but she understood very well why: in a place governed by talent and ambition, she had neither. Her classmates had been raised as magi and taught the basics a long time ago, whereas she was completely new to the very notion of magecraft. Taking that into account, it could be said she had done a great job to even get where she was. She had made up for her lack of knowledge with diligence and an analytical mind, so anything that wasn't too abstract was within her reach.

Even so, she was simply not a good magus. She didn't care much either way. But if someone went as far as to imply (or outright say) her lack of good marks was due to her origins, she wouldn't take it lying down. She was ready to live with those irritating conditions but she had no patience to spare for people.

That was why, one day when a teacher of her tested the end of her patience, she heabutted him.

She would probably get fired for something like that. That fact only occured to her after she had done it however, as otherwise she wouldn't have done it. For how much she hated this damned place, she only had so many options if she wanted to fulfill her original objective. She couldn't really say she regretted what she had done though. Since she was who she was, if they kicked her out she would spit on the ground and leave without looking back.

She had already pictured all of that in her head by the time her teacher had hit the floor.

However, what actually happened afterward had been outside her expectation. No doubt that the teacher in question was dying to have her fired or worse, but he wasn't the one who acted immediatly. Instead, someone from her class stood up and started ridiculing her at length and pretty much called her names in various ways. She wasn't used to fighting anyone with words, so she just stood here on the receiving end of his thorough humiliation. By the time that classmate was done, their teacher had cooled his head and nothing happened to her in the end.

As far Hatsuyo was concerned though, that had been no reason to be thankful; instead, she had sworn an eternal grudge on her classmate for that incident.

...

Although, even had she ignored the treatment from everyone around her, she wouldn't have been content: she had vastly underestimated the task she had on her hands.

She wished to break the curse tied to her bloodline for good but she had quickly been forced to recognize just how little she knew about it. She had managed to learn more about curses by combing through many books at the Clock Tower's massive library, but it was a very vast subject made up of more exceptions than rules.

Without knowlegde about her own specific situation, she couldn't go far. Her father had included no such details in his will, perhaps he hadn't known about it either. She had truly embarked on a quest with none of the tools required for it. In the first place, she didn't even know what their 'curse' truly was and, for all she knew, it wasn't really a curse. After all, it was a strange thing to curse your bloodline. And if it was transmitted by blood and had lasted for centuries, then it couldn't be as easy to remove as a haunting or a supernatural illness.

Months went by and still she hadn't made any progress worth noting.

All she had successfully done had been to ascertain how out of her depth she was. From the beginning she hadn't expected it to be easy, but the more time was passing and the more she realized the sheer breadth of the mission she had taken upon herself. Between researching her own history as well as obtaining the skills she needed, it could take a lifetime.

But she didn't have a lifetime.

At least, not the lifetime of a normal person. She had gathered up the resolution to at least alleviate the regrets of her father in the afterlife and settle the score with herself, but how long could she keep it up? Two years? Ten years? Fifteen? She couldn't imagine going beyond that number. Sometimes, she caught herself thinking she wouldn't even last a full year.

The Clock Tower was a gathering of many experts with experience far beyond her own, so there had to be people in this place who could aid her. Even so, she hadn't once thought of asking anyone for help. If she were to ask one of them, they would never agree without getting something in return, and she had nothing to give them.

In the first place, the idea of receiving help from anyone was sordid.

Anyone in their right mind would stay away from her; her foster family must have felt obligated by the ties of blood, and to this day Hatsuyo was still wondering what that land overseer had gained from introducing her into the Mage's Association. Thus, she had never planned to involve anyone but herself.

But she wasn't getting any result done.

Her classes were supposed to make her a better magus but all she could think about was how far she was from her goal. Handing in homeworks and taking exams were such a pain – she had better things to do than that!

Even if her determination lasted long enough, her funds would run out first. All the money she had was the one left behind by her father; living in another country by herself was costly. She had never learned how to cook, so she was forced to take out or eat disgusting pre-made food. To save as much money as possible, she had adopted the same eating habits as someone penniless. Asking her aunt for help was out of question, which meant the only solution left for her once she ran out was to find a job.

Although, for someone like her to take a part-time job like a normal person was...

Well, that was impossible.

Even if she found something, she would probably be fired in no time.

Until this day, she hadn't ever had to worry about things like food or money. Even having a proper place to call 'home' was something she had taken for granted. Only now, when she was alone and could only rely on herself, did she realize how much her aunt's family had done for her. She had never returned that favour. If she had felt all alone back then, what should she call the way she felt now?

But when she had left them, she had already decided she would never meet them again.

Thanks to her current lifestyle and this isolation, she was more focused than ever on breaking her curse. And in turn, she was growing more restless at her own uselessness. There may not have been a short path to take, but how could she give herself a pat on the back when a short path was the only thing that could save her? Merely thinking about it was enough to wake up her headaches.

All she could do was to vent in whatever way she was able, and to endure.

Although...

Speaking of venting, there was something noteworthy about her new life here at the Clock Tower.

One element which somehow managed to stand out from the rest: him.

The classmate who had made a fool out of her in front of the whole class, the boy she had vowed to punch in the teeth later, had from that day on pestered her to no end. For one reason or another, and sometimes no reason at all, he would come and find her even when she didn't want to see his face. And what would he come for, if not to mock her even more? He harrassed her with that nasty tongue of his and then slipped away when he was satisfied.

He was an absolute pain the ass, such was the impression deeply carved into Hatsuyo by that Leo Argas.

She had no reason to hold back her opinion and, for that matter, she never missed the opportunity to swing her fists at him. On a good day, she could catch him off guard and give him what he deserved; most of the time though, he got away with a single punch or managed to escape before she could enact his just dessert. In that way, he was very much like a cockroach.

But...

...No matter how much she roughed him up, he would end up coming back. Violence was usually the way she pushed people away from her, yet for some reason it didn't work on him. She had wondered at first if he could be one of those masochists she had heard about – but if he were, he wouldn't be trying to avoid her attacks. Then, he had to be a sadist who enjoyed pushing her buttons until she lost her cool.

At any rate, ever since that day, Leo Argas had become a part of her daily life. On rainy days, on sunny days, on snowy days – whenever and wherever, he was here to pester her. Eventually, it had started to feel natural even to Hatsuyo. No matter what she told or did to him, she expected to see him later.

No, even worse, she was looking forward to seeing him again; that was something she realized with much horror and disgust.

It was a nonsensical feeling and she would rather not think about it. She was content with telling herself that was because of how convenient a punching bag he was: he always came back no matter what and always gave her more reason to hit him. Thanks to that, she was able to let out a lot of steam regularly enough. It wasn't like she went around and vented her frustration on other people to begin with. She only gave in to her temper if they pushed her too far. So having someone she could regularly hurl insults and anger at made a world of a difference.

In a way, it reminded her of the life she had used to live as a middle schooler, going around after school and beating up as many people as possible. But this was different from that time. For one, despite how she felt on the matter, she had never beaten Leo to a pulp. That was partly because of how slippery he was, but she still made sure to only batter him a little compared to what her strength would allow. And also... well, it was a hard thing to explain. She was not blindly giving in to her impulse or attacking people like a wild animal anymore.

It was more deliberate.

More personal.

Somehow, punching him felt different from hitting other people who got on her nerves.

After a while, she seriously started thinking about what was going on between them to have a dynamic like that. As far back as she could remember, there was no comparison she could think of.

He wasn't like Yoshiko: he was always picking fights with her.

He wasn't like the friends she'd had in grade school or her foster family: frankly, she had never really cared about the distance between him and her.

But he wasn't like the other magi in the Clock Tower either: at least, when he made fun of her, it wasn't about the same stupid things.

In the end, she couldn't tell what their relationship was. And she wasn't sure how she felt about it either. But when she tried to imagine how life in this place would have been without his pesky presence... she realized he was the only person who truly 'existed' here.

The people around her snided behind her back or to her face, they ignored her and pretended she didn't exist. And so, to her they had no faces and no names. This was nothing new for her – when she walked down the hallways or sat down in class, it felt as though she was the only living being around. And yet, she recognized his face and she knew his name.

He would come to find her with a smug face for some stupid reason.

They would spend a while arguing back and forth, although it would be mostly him using weird logic and pretty words to twist things in his favour.

And finally, she would chase him off with the threat of a kick to his bum.

It was always the same thing, always in this order. Somehow, they had settled in that cycle without thinking about it and neither of them had ever tried to put an end to it. It was almost like an unspoken agreement. It was irritating and repetitive at times... but it was also comforting. A predictable event with a predictable conclusion; this monotony was the only stability she had managed to find. Her head never hurt either when he was here, no matter how pissed she would get.

She hated it.

Until he had come along, she had never thought she could want something like that.

It brought back memories of a different time, one she could never go back to.

She really hated it.

In the end, she still didn't know what he was supposed to be to her. But maybe she didn't need a word for it. He could say all the stupid things he wanted, she would still listen to them and then hit him. And she could indulge in her anger without feeling any shame, he would still come back to do it all over again. A predictable pattern, that was the link between them.

That was all it had to be.

Nothing more, nothing less.

That was the closest to friendship a monster like her could get.

...

Even so, she made no progress at all.

She could wrap her head around concepts that had eluded her before, she tried different approaches and even tapped into her own ability to get a better understanding of it. But at the end of the day, she couldn't even tell if she was on the right tracks or not. It was like being lost in a blizzard, where everything was dyed white and hidden from dight. And once the storm would settle down, she would find out the world had been drowned in snow and that it was too late to find her way.

All she could do was freeze to death.

Even after a year had passed, that was the point she was stuck at.

Then... if she stumbled upon a true miracle, it was fine if she reached for it, right?

Even though it wasn't her choice, she had still been granted a chance. As if someone somewhere had learned of her plight and had decided to finally throw her a bone. One morning, she had just woken up with those red tatoos on her hand. As soon as she learned what the Holy Grail War was, she knew it to be what she needed. A freak show for magi and ancient heroes to kill each other – that was probably the rightful place for someone like her. And if she made it to the very end, she could get whatever she wanted.

Considering that it would normally only be seven people, the fact that there was such a large amount of participants was almost like a unpleasant joke. But she didn't care. All that mattered was the reward. It was her final chance. Her only chance to make it before her spirit gave out.

Hatsuyo couldn't do it the way she currently was, however.

She knew that, in order to reach that miracle, she would have to go against everything she had built in the span of almost ten years. To use the instincts she had repressed for so long, she had to use that sword. Not simply carry it around to satisfy her addiction, but to turn it against other human beings as it was meant to be.

A part of her, deep within her soul, was rejoicing; but she shut her up.

There was only one Hatsuyo.

She wouldn't run away.

She understood very well what she had to do.

It wouldn't be an accident or a fluke this time: she was going to take more lives in cold blood. She would dedicate her entire self to the sole thing she had ever been good for, and she would become a monster completely. She would drown in the blood she had spilt if she had to.

And, at long last, she would be able to make things right.

...

She couldn't exactly do it alone though; in accordance to this whole ritual, she was supposed to summon a 'Servant' to fight. She thought that was a strange to do in the first place, but if that was all she needed to be a Master it wasn't going to scare her.

Incidentally, she remembered something she had heard about a long time ago; she had no choice but to call her cousins so that they could fetch it for her and send it by mail. She also had to deal with an unending barrage of questions from them, alledgedly because she barely ever contacted them. Well, in the end, she had gotten what she wanted: it was just a vey old dragonfly carcass that was ready to turn into dust at any second, but she had been told it was related to someone very important.

"Ooh, that's the light of day, that's the light of day for real~!" She was shocked when it actually worked though. "Servant Lancer, nice to meetcha! I've answered yer call to become your blade, my lord! And to have some fun on the side, if ya don't mind~."

She had ended up summoning a really strange guy. She didn't like the idea of having someone sticking to her all day and night, so the first thing she had asked of him had been: 'Don't be in my way'. Lancer had laughed to her face when she had said that, but he turned out to be a lot easier to get along with than she had expected.

He said some dumb things sometimes and he would act behind her back without being asked anything, but he would otherwise listen to anything she said. She didn't especially like being called a 'lord' all the time but she had to admit it didn't feel bad to have someone like him around. After all, if his power was the real deal then there was no way she would ever hurt him, even if she lost her mind. Maybe for that reason, she felt at ease around him.

Apparently, he wasn't her only 'ally' either – she was introduced to a whole bunch of other Masters and Servants with whom she was supposed to cooperate.

She wasn't an idiot though: this was only an alliance out of necessity. There could only be a single real winner at the very end, so they would turn against each others as soon as all of their opponents had been dealt with. She didn't have to care about these people. They would end up hating her in the end anyway. It was better for all of them if thet didn't pretend to be friends.

But... why did he have to be here as well?

Of all the people in this damned world, why did Leo Argas have to be a Master? And as always, he was treating it like it was nothing... could he not understand what position he was in? If a day came when the two of them had to stand against one another, it wouldn't go like their routines. Admittedly, only Servants had to die for the ritual to be complete, but that was a naive thing to believe. She had already decided that there was no turning back once she chose to get her hands on the Grail.

At any rate, they were on the same side at the moment, so it wasn't something she had to think about right now.

Maybe he would lose his Servant to against someone else, or perhaps he would be smarter than that and step down of his own will.

And if he was going to get himself killed...

Well, he knew how to run away really fast, so he was probably going to get out alright.

'...I'm really powerless until the very end.'

She ended up revealing her true face to him though. That was something he would have to see sooner or later, but even so... when she saw the way he was looking at her, it was as though she could see her own monstrosity reflected in his eyes. She hadn't thought she could still be shocked at this point but... that blood covering her hands was one she had wilfully drawn.

That was what she had decided to become.

So, she would keep going on.

To her surprise, however, one of their enemies had offered her to turn traitor. He had used sweet words meant to mislead her, she knew that. But he hadn't been entirely wrong either. It was in her best interest for the Holy Grail War to keep going instead of grinding to an endless stalemate, and if she weakened her own Faction she would be getting closer to her objective.

She hadn't jumped on the occasion though.

Crossing that line would meant turning against him as well; was that a silly thing to worry about after coming this far already?

This link they had shared was a comfortable place for her to stay. Too comfortable perhaps. And maybe that place didn't exist anymore: lately, he had started acting strange. For example, organizing a Christmas party and inviting her, or asking about her life. That wasn't part of the script; she didn't understand what was going on in his head at all.

Even so, didn't it feel right to be here?

...

'I used to think you too didn't fit in the Clock Tower, but I was wrong. Actually, you don't fit anywhere!'

She had been mistaken again, however.

Somehow, she had managed to forget along the way: she didn't have a place in this world.

So... she didn't have to worry about herself, or anything really.

Her determination was worth more than this.

'I... is that... how it is...?'

She had decided that her wish was the terminus to begin with, so why should she care about what she left behind?

Even if nothing was left for her, it didn't mean a thing.

'This is... your fault.'

It was certainely his fault if she had hesitated for so long. But he had also been the one to remind her of what she was meant to do. In that sense, she was thankful, even if there was nothing to be happy about.

That was her duty.

The only thing she could do to make amends.

So she would keep going.

Even if it meant destroying herself and everything around her, she would reach out and touch that miracle which only answered to blood.

Nana... Nana...

What would she think if she saw her like this...?

...

...

Nana too was going to be happy... in the end.

Chapter LXXX: Kindred Soul

* Higanbana – Savon de Fleur

Leo had finally made it.

As it turned out, his luck wasn't so terrible after all. Although, it was as much thanks to whims and random gut feelings as it was due to chance. Did that still count as chance?

Not that it mattered, he was simply happy that he could reach his destination in less than an hour.

Turning back for no real reason and returning to where Neo Helios was stuck had been the right call to make. Since he really had no way to tell where anyone was on the Ark, Leo had been resigned to ask someone from the Black Faction for help. With a little luck, it wouldn't have been a murderous maniac with complete disregard for human life.

But when he had gotten there, he had heard the sound of weapons clashing in the distance. He had been very hesitant to approach but it had really been his best bet: if people were fighting, then at least two Factions were present. If there was a member of the Red Faction, he would finally have found an ally. If there was someone from the Black Faction, he might get the indications he needed.

In the end, he got something ever better though: all of sudden, Hatsuyo had jumped out of a street while carrying a huge guy and had proceeded to throw said huge guy overboard. He didn't know what all of that was about, but the fact was that he didn't need to ask anyone for help anymore.

Was he ready to face her though?

He was certainly filled with doubts but after running around so much and pushing his body to the limit, he didn't care enough to do nothing.

And so, he walked up to her.

"...You..." She heard him approaching and turned around. When she saw it was him, Hatsuyo's eyes opened wide for a second. The next moment though, she frowned. "Why did you come here...?"

Leo opened his mouth to speak but no sound came out.

What would be the appropriate thing to say here? He could try to say something cool or crack a joke to soften the atmosphere, but the latter was way too heavy for him to come up with anything. Not to mention, he wasn't sure Hatsuyo would be very receptive to a jest. His heart was still racing from his intense jogging, so he took a moment to calm down and think harder. When his breathing settled down though, he still had absolutely no idea what to tell her.

Since that's how it was, and since he still had to say something, he gave up on being appropriate and fell back on the absolute basics of socializing: he waved his hand at her in a friendly demeanor.

"Yo." He greeted her.

It didn't exactly have the effect he had hoped for: she was glarring at him more and more. Well, that was about what he had expected anyway. He had dragged himself across the Ark, had searched desperately without a single clue and had finally found her – which meant that the easy part was now over.

"That's all you have you say...?" Hatsuyo growled.

"Hey, at least I said something."

"You had the chance to die back then." She clicked her tongue.

"If that's really what you think, you could have done a better job." Leo tried to smirk but that memory was still too fresh in his mind. "I got away A-okay!"

"And instead of treasuring your life, you chose to come here instead? You should have stayed holed up inside your bed and let someone competent fight for you."

"Hey, I know I'm not strong, no need to twist the knife..." Admittedly, someone in his condition really should be taking it easy. But now was way too late to think about that. "Besides, I came here because there's something I have to do. It's not like I can let other people take care of my problems all the time, right?"

"... ... ... ...I see. So that's how it is." Hatsuyo unsheathed the katana at her hip and pointed it at Leo. "Even though you know how darn weak you are, you thought you could take me on?"

"...Huh?" Leo blinked.

He could feel a cold sweat all over his body simply from the way she was staring at him. That was something he should have known very well: right now, Hatsuyo was not just kidding around. She was ready to kill; but he didn't understand why she was reacting like that. When she stepped toward him weapon in hand, Leo felt a tingling sensation on his belly, on the same spot where she had stabbed him weeks ago. He still remembered the sting of that blade.

"Wait–"

"You thought you could take your revenge on me without even bringing your Servant?"

"...Huh?!"

That was when it dawned on him: all this time, he had worried about whether she would even want to speak to him, and yet not even once had he thought about what she would think. What conclusion would she come to if he came after her, when the last time they had met she had shanked him?

"Wait wait wait, that's a misu–"

His raised his hands in front of him to hold her back, but Hatsuyo would not wait: in a swift movement that his eyes couldn't follow, she had swung her sword diagonally across his body. Cold steel effortlessly cut through his clothes, flesh and bones, carving a line so deep that she might as well have cut him in half.

Or at least, that was what would have happened if Leo really had been standing there.

But when Hatsuyo's katana passed through him, the illusion of himself he had cast disappeared.

"As I thought..." Hatsuyo grumbled. "So you're still not that stupid yet."

Even if he hadn't expected her to get agressive so suddenly, there was no way Leo would have approached her without at least some precaution. Hatsuyo could seriously hurt him even without a weapon, so he would rather not show himself until he felt safe. However, having a conversation like that felt weird: at the very least, they should be able to see each other, otherwise it wouldn't feel like he was being honest.

That was why he cast another mirage in his place.

"What, are you going to play hide and seek until I'm tired? I'll find you before then." Incidentally, Hatsuyo was glaring at his illusion instead of him, which was certainely unusual. But alas.

"I told you to wait!"

"Do you really think there's such a thing as a time out in a real fight?"

"This isn't a real fight! I'm not here to kill you!" He protested.

"Do you expect me to believe you and lower my guard?"

"I'm expecting you to show a little more trust! If I'd really wanted to take my revenge on you, I wouldn't have revealed myself, would I?"

"You didn't reveal yourself." She spoke the harsh truth. "And you're dumb enough to do that."

"Says the one who's too dumb to recognize a trustworthy person when she sees one!" Leo crossed his arms and blew through his nose.

Instead of words, Hatsuyo replied with her sword a second time. Poor Illusion Leo lost his head before vanishing from existence. Unfortunately, real Leo didn't have the time to mourn his loss before setting up the next mirage, and as he did so he wondered where to go from here. Actually, it didn't really matter if Hatsuyo believed him or not: even if that wasn't the reunion he had hoped for, he didn't exactly need her consent for this. That being said, he wanted to speak earnestly just as much as he wanted her to listen earnestly.

For once, he wanted to break that barrier between them.

"What can I do to make you trust me, then?" He asked.

"You can't."

"Is it scientifically possible to be this hardheaded?"

"If I lower my guard, you kill me. If you show yourself, I kill you. It's as simple as that."

"For the last time, that's not... ugh..." Leo loudly sighed.

Thinking about it, she had always been stubborn like that, always ignoring what he said even when he made a valid point. He had never really thought much about it though, had he? Maybe things wouldn't be so hard if he had. But it wasn't too late – the time they had spent together was very much real; if he wanted to trust the Hatsuyo in front of him, he had to trust that as well.

And he also needed to trust she had been paying attention to him as well: why would Hatsuyo believe he wanted to kill her? It was true that he had often done nothing but tease her for his own entertainment, even if it meant being gratuitously mean. But he had never been aggressive or attacked her physically. Hell, he couldn't ever remember being violent in front of her. The fact that she had 'tried to kill him' might be a sufficient motive for revenge, but it was still strange to expect someone like Leo to resort to killing.

So why did she believe so adamantly that he was after her life?

...

"...Did I say something that hurt you?" He asked.

"When haven't you?"

Another Leo bit the dust and was replaced before soon.

"That's... true I guess." He scratched his head. "But it didn't make me look like such a heartless guy, did it...?"

"It made you look like a piece of shit. What are you trying to say?" She replied dryly.

"I'm just..."

Leo found it surprisingly hard to simply tell what he wanted to say. This wasn't something the old him would have cared about, probably - he had never been too careful with his words. He had never been good at telling the truth either but he had believed he could do it if he really wanted to. Now though, he understood he couldn't take honesty for granted.

Honesty that came too late.

Honesty that never came.

He couldn't tell which one was worse.

Lately, he had managed to open himself to people he had barely known. That was certainly something he couldn't imagine himself doing a year ago, so he had felt a little more confident. But maybe that not knowing these people had actually made it easier for him. Now that he stood in front of someone who had only ever seen him with a mask on, it was harder than he had thought to take it off.

But... that wasn't exactly right.

He wasn't hiding behind a mask, that was only the way he saw it. The weight on his face came from none other than himself. But he didn't want it anymore. No more veil. No more pretense. No more pride. If he chose to believe it wasn't there, then there was no mask.

And if the latter was off, then the only thing he could show was what lied beyond.

"You know, I don't hate you."

"Liar." Hatsuyo mercilessly diced up another mirage. "That's the most bald-faced lie you've ever made."

"I really mean it though. It hurt a lot and you were super scary back then, mind you. But weirdly enough, I couldn't hate you. In fact, I..." He chewed on his words for a second, but he eventually let them out. "...I hated myself the most. I didn't even have the strength to resent you. And if I do have it now, well, I'm not sure what I'd do with it."

"I don't understand anything of what you're saying."

"...It made me think, we've never really talked heart to heart, have we?"

"..."

Hatsuyo's arm froze in its tracks. It was only for a second though: the next moment, she finished dispatching another mirage. She was slicing through his illusions almost casually, to the point it didn't even look like she was fighting. And yet, her attention was focused on them more so than on him.

"It also made me think a lot about all we went through... I mean, before the Holy Grail War. Well, actually I'd been thinking about it before. What I'm trying to say is... well, I wanted to have a talk with you. So I came here."

"What...? You came here to have me listen to you, and then I'll shout some insults at you while kicking you away? Just like we used to...?" A vein popped on Hatsuyo's forehead. "Are you kidding me? It's not the time to do whatever you want and act on a whim – this is a Holy Grail War!"

"That's exactly why! After you left, I had no idea if I would see you ever again! That's why I don't care if it's childish or out of place; if I don't do what I want while I can, I'll never be able to. And that's worse than looking stupid!"

"You'll die, that's all you're going to achieve. You've thrown yourself in the middle of a battlefield, and for what? To have a chat with me? Is that how little value your life has?"

"There are things I want to tell you, and that's as important as my life to me. I don't care if you believe me or not." He did care, but he couldn't get everything he wanted. They were able to meet again, and if he could tell what was on his mind, he could be happy with it. "Even if it's weird, I don't hate you. I'd never try to kill you either."

"Then I will kill you!"

"Well, I don't believe you!"

"What is that supposed to mean? You think I'm all bark and no bite?! I'm telling you I will!"

"If you won't believe me, then I don't have to believe you either!" Leo stuck out his tongue. "If you had wanted to kill me, I would be dead! And even if you really meant to kill me back then, I'd still not believe it! I don't need a reason or proof – that's just how I feel! Good luck convincing me otherwise!"

Illusion Leo's smugness didn't last long before he got cleaved in two but his will was undeterred. On the contrary, the more they exchanged words, the more his confidence grew. He had been so afraid to face her up until now, yet this was exactly how they had always been around each other. The place and circumstances may have changed but they were ultimately just two blokeheads hurling words at each other without listening. He could be every bit as stubborn as her if he wanted; but this time, he wanted to accept her as well.

That was why, even though he was almost fooling around, he felt a deep sadness.

"I trust you. So even though you might hate me, I wanted to see you. You know, I realized eventually: I used to think everyone around me hated me, when the truth is that I was projecting my own hatred on them. Is that... is that why you think I hate you? The one who would come after you and kill you, is it really me? Or is it you?"

"..."

Hatsuyo's body sized up; the arm holding her sword was trembling, but with what emotion?

"After you left, I went to visit your appartment. And I saw that room." Leo confessed. "We've spent almost a year together but I really had no idea how you felt that entire time. We never shared much of anything about ourselves, did we? I used to think we were friends but maybe I'm the only one who thought that way."

"..."

"And it scared me. It was scary to think we're like strangers. But I'm not afraid anymore."

With a snap of his finger, Leo made the illusion he had cast vanish. Hatsuyo blinked in surprise and looked around until her eyes fell on him; he had also removed the illusion keeping him invisible. He knew just how dangerous of a move it was but it was something he had to do.

"That's the real me." He raised his hands as a warning. "That's not an illusion or a clone, so don't kill me please."

"What are you doing...?" Hatsuyo frowned; well, more than usual. "Have you finally gone crazy?"

"Hey, don't slander me. There's another reason I wanted to find you, and I can't do it if you can't see me." Saying so, Leo took his backpack off and put it down to rummage through it. "This is yours, right?"

"...!" Hatsuyo's eyes opened wide.

What Leo took out of his bag was plushy.

A chick plushy to be more exact.

It was still worn down, a little wet and its original colour was partly faded, but it was in a better state than when he had seen it the first time. It was a miracle in and of itself that he had managed to bring it with him considering how many times he had almost lost his stuff. Even though it wasn't that huge, that plushy had still taken up the most space in his bag and had limited what he could bring with him, so Leo would have hated it if it had been damaged on top of that.

"It was all beat up, so I repaired it." Actually, Michael was the one who had patched it up since Leo didn't know how to sew. Still, it had been his idea; at long last, the chick didn't have any filling poking out from its sides. "Your place is so empty it's almost spooky. So if you had this with you, it must be really important, right?"

Leo held out the chick plush toward her. Hatsuyo was making a face he had never seen before: she looked like she had just seen the most ludicrous thing in the world. It seemed Leo had bet on the right horse. He hadn't actually had any idea about the emotional value of what he held in his hands. After all, it was found all weathered underneath her bed. For all he had known, it could have been some junk she had picked up on a whim. He would have looked really stupid if that had been the case.

But the way Hatsuyo was staring at it, he felt he had been right to not just leave it laying around.

"Nana...?"

She walked a few steps closer and held out her hand slowly.

However, Leo's hopes were dashed the very next second – Hatsuyo raised her sword and, with a swift stroke,

the stuffed chick was sliced in half.

* Fata Morgana – Girlhood in Shambles

"I don't need the past!" Then, she drew back her fist and punched him hard enough to throw him to the floor. "Are you making fun of me?! What does it matter now?! It's too late!"

Leo stood up with difficulty; the pain in his chest was so great that his body would have preferred staying down. When he was back up on his feet however, he saw Hatsuyo walk toward him – and the look in her eyes sent chills down his spine.

Instinctively, he stepped back.

"I don't need Nana! I don't need you! And I don't need those memories! I don't need anyone! Why can't you get that through your thick skull!" As Hatsuyo approached, he stepped away with a slight shiver. "What's wrong...? Are you scared now? You were so confident that you were safe, where did that go?!"

"I'm pretty sure you'd still cut me a bit, so I'm looking out for my limbs..." Leo smiled bitterly but it was exactly as she said: he was recoiling in fear.

Not because his courage was fake, mind you. Hatsuyo was always in a bad mood but that wasn't the same vibe as he was getting right now. What she was displaying was genuine rage, not just annoyance or stubbornness. There was an intensity in her eyes which she had never shown Leo before. She wasn't grumbling empty threats or snarling like she used to; she was screaming from the top of her lungs, with so much power her voice started to crack.

And with that anger, she swung her sword in front of her over and over again. Her blade was hitting nothing but there couldn't be a clearer message to not get any closer. Leo didn't think it was a warning though: to him, it looked like this sword was reflecting exactly how she felt.

This was what he had asked for: the true feelings of Hatsuyo Toriyama.

He had hit his head against this wall again and again, desperate to get on the other side. And now that he had finally cracked a hole into this shell, he found himself on the receiving end of what lied inside.

"Why are you doing this?! Every time, you keep coming back no matter what I do or say! I even stabbed you so you'd understand to stay away: this is what happens to those who stay around me! Are you blind!? How much blood do I need on my hands before you understand!? I'm a monster! I destroy everything around me, that's all I can do! I don't need someone like you standing in my way!"

"...I see." Leo muttered. "I should've heard this a long time ago. Sorry."

"Shut up! Don't you give me that look!" She gritted her teeth. "I'm projecting on people...? As if someone like you could understand! You have no idea how it feels like! How I've had to live!"

"You're right, I don't know. That's why I want to know! I want you to tell me about it, about everything I failed to notice sooner!"

Hatsuyo was relentlessly approaching, threatening him with the swings of her weapon and forcing him to step farther and farther back. But the truth was, what scared Leo the most wasn't the ruthless cold blade; it was her words. He couldn't deny any of what she had said. Those were the words he had been afraid of, the harsh truth that there was a deep gap separating them. The truth that he hadn't done anything right.

He had been prepared to hear it, but even so...

"So what?! So what, if I told you?! It wouldn't change anything! It wouldn't have changed what I am! You think it's going to make you feel better!? Look at me! This is who I am! This is all there is!"

That wasn't something he could let her say.

" No, I was happy. When we met for the first time and we started hanging out, it really made me happy." He knew nothing about her, that was true. But she was not a stranger. "To be honest, it wasn't all in good intentions. You always acted rashly, you weren't good at anything except swinging a sword and you said unreasonable stuff. So... I guess I felt a little superior. Maybe I wanted to feel good that there was someone around who was even worse than me."

"Shut up! What's the point of telling me that now!?"

"But I think I was also a little jealous. I wanted to feel superior but you were actually stronger than me. When you wanted to tell someone off, you did it. Even if it was someone important or with more authority, it didn't stop you. Back then, I thought... it felt like you could do anything you want and say what's on your mind without a care in the world. I know I was wrong, but... I did wish I could be as strong as you."

"What strength!? Look at me, is that what you wanted?! I didn't have the strength to do anything, I was completely useless!"

"Maybe that's true; you'd know better than me. But you know what? When I said I admired you, that's also true! Even if you were a walking public danger, you felt more warm and alive than everyone else in that damned place. And you looked like you hated it as much as me, so it made me feel a little less alone. I thought I'd found someone like me. It's not perfect company and, honestly, we were kinda fighting all the time. But it was better than anything else I had, so I wanted to spend more time together."

"Shut up..."

"It felt right. When you were shouting at me or trying to grab me, I didn't have to worry about anything else. We were fooling around like idiots, but it felt like it was the rest of the world that was the fool. That's how I felt – even if it turns out you're a monster, that's a fact that will never change!"

"Shut up! Even if everything you said were true, it's too late! I can't turn back! I can't afford to fail now!"

Eventually, Leo couldn't step back anymore: his back had hit the railing of the Ark.

They were now standing on the very edge of the ship and Hatsuyo was still advancing. He could still run away on the sides but that fact did not register in his head: his attention was focused not on her sword but on the face she was making – in the first place, he had gone backward only because she had been coming forward.

"I'm a cursed monster! All I can do with this strength is to win and obtain the Grail! It's all I can do...! So... I'll do anything...! I'll kill anyone if they stand in my way, because I'm a monster! This is something only I can do! I'll even kill you!" Hatsuyo was out of breath, yet even so she didn't stop screaming or moving her arm. "It's... better this way... if I kill you, at least... you can be saved..."

"...Huh? What are you sa–"

Shh–!

Leo was interrupted when the katana finally struck him. It was a very superficial wound; it had grazed his arm and his knee, barely enough to draw some blood. But this pain was a good reminder that this threat was real. Even though Leo's mind felt calm, his body seized up with panic; Hatsuyo was close enough to kill him. That was something she realized as well: now that he had his back against a wall, all she had to do was to attack for real.

And for that purpose, she raised her sword above her head with both hands.

"You said you wanted to see me, but I didn't want to...! We weren't supposed to meet ever again! You were supposed to hate me and stay away! You didn't have to care or think about me for the rest of your life!"

"I can't do that, Hatsuy–"

"There's no Hatsuyo!" Her voice had gotten rough from all the screaming and slowly lost its power. "When this is all over, there'll be no more 'Hatsuyo'... I can finally take everything back... I can make this curse disappear for good...! And with it, monsters will be gone too..."

"...!" The meaning of those words finally dawned on Leo and struck him with fright. "What are you saying...?"

"They can all be happy... They can live just as they wanted to... With the Holy Grail, I can make a world where I was never born!"

The sword was still raised high, like a guillotine waiting only for the order to come down. But Leo was not paying any attention to it anymore: Hatsuyo's words had wiped his mind blank. Her expression was filled with pain and anger but her eyes were still looking straight into his. No doubt then that she really meant those words.

But when it finally registered with his brain...

"What...? I don't want that!" He shouted back. "I don't want a world without you!"

"...As if you'd understand... ha... hahaha..." For the first time since he had met her, Leo heard Hatsuyo laugh. A dry, weak laughter devoid of any joy. "It'll be better for everyone if I never existed."

"That's not better for me! I don't even wanna imagine how it would have been without you! And how can I believe it's a good thing when you're making this face!?"

"..."

"I don't believe you're a monster! I don't believe my life would be better without you! And I don't believe there's no hope left!"

"Who said anything about hope...?"

"I did!" Leo slammed his hand on his chest.

"I didn't ask for anything... I didn't ask you to believe shit!" Hatsuyo gritted her teeth.

"I know I've done and thought stupid things in the past. But even when I gave up on myself, there were people who didn't give up on me! I should... I should have done the same for you, but I was so busy thinking about myself that I didn't even realize how much you were hurting!"

"I didn't ask for your help..."

"I don't care! This is something I want to do – not because you asked for help, but because you didn't! I can't let you give up on yourself and pretend I'm happier that way!" His voice became half chocked, drowned in his emotions. "You never let anything through and you try to take on too much by yourself! You're always unreasonable and you never want to accept kindness, but you're still the one who made me feel like I wasn't alone in this world! You're still the Hatsuyo I know, not a monster! And if that's what you are, then I'm also a monster!"

It was ironic, in a way: even though Hatsuyo had to be the one hurting the most, Leo was the one who ended up crying. When she saw tears trinkling down his cheeks, Hatsuyo's face twitched and her expression became undecipherable. Her blade was still hanging above her head but it was swaying slightly – she was shivering.

"I came all the way here to find you even after you stabbed me in the guts, so that makes me at least as much of a monster as you are!" He wasn't even sure what he was saying anymore. "Even if I can't understand or share the same pain as you, I won't let you be alone!"

"Shut up!"

And finally, the sword came down.

* Stop music

Leo flinched and closed his eyes; there was only so much bravey he could have. But although he felt a sharp pain, it was nothing compared to what he had braced himself for. It was nothing more than a small twinge, even if that was painful enough on its own. When he found the courage to open his eyes, he saw the blade of her sword resting on his shoulders, its edge barely biting into his skin.

Even though he could swear she had swung it down with all her strength, the katana had struck him more feebly than a breeze.

"Shut up... please..." As unbelievable as it sounded, anger had vanished from her face. All that was left was a deep sadness. "Please, stop... why would you go so far... for someone like me...?"

It only lasted for a second however. Before soon, Hatsuyo hardened herself again. After taking a few steps back and lowering her sword, she looked him with eyes that were softer than usual yet firm nonetheless. And finally, after returning her weapon to its sheath, she spoke:

"I can't turn back. Not after all I've done." Unlike before, she managed to speal calmly. But the resignation in her voice had not disappeared, far from there.

"Hatsuyo..." Leo reached out his hand. This distance, which he had managed to bridge for the span of an instant, was increasing again; he couldn't accept it. "That's not how it has to be! You can still–"

But the next second, his hand was gone.

It had not really vanished: he saw it detach from his arm and fall down; by reflex, he caught it with his other hand without realizing what had happened. For a strange moment, he felt nothing at all – then, his severed nerves began screaming with a searing pain, signaling that his hand had been cut off for real. But the culprit was not Hatsuyo; she hadn't moved an inch and looked every bit as shocked as he was.

No, the one responsible for this was...

"Ya can't just do whatever ya want right now, sorry~." Lancer of Red chirped. It was eerie just how casually he was smiling to Leo, as though he was simply saying hello. "It's embarassin' if ya don't think about yer position. I'm s'pposed to treat you as an enemy, ya know?"

"Lancer...?" Hatsuyo looked at her Servant with confusion.

But then, she looked behind her.

Neither of them had felt the spearman's presence a moment ago, and for a good reason since he had just now arrived. And he was not alone: two silhouettes approached and Leo felt his stomach sink when he understood who they were. He had never seen that woman before but there was no way he wouldn't recognize Odysseus. After all, he had witnessed the death of Charles Pendleton and Völundr. And he knew when their gazes crossed that he had every reason to be afraid.

"Our apologies for the lateness. Those golems were more of a handful than anticipated. They should not bother us anymore." Odysseus said and he turned his attention to Hatsuyo. "I do not see the vampire anywhere. Since you seem to be in one piece, I assume he's met his end?"

"I threw him in the water." Hatsuyo replied, gesturing toward the railing with her thumb.

"That's my Master for ya~! I was worried I might be too late, but now ya make me ashamed as yer Servant!" Lancer laughed to himself. But then, a shadow passed over his face. "Not everything's peachy though."

"This one is Saber of Red's Master, is he not?"

Odysseus' question was purely rhetorical; the way he was looking at Leo was cold and ruthless.

"I cannot feel your Servant's presence in the viscinity. But if you possess your rights as a Master still... this is the perfect occasion." A bow materialized in his hand. "That holy knight is undoubtly one of the most dangerous Servants at the moment. With such a defenseless target, I can rest easy."

"Hey, you." Elena Bujart called out to Hatsuyo with a scowl. "Eliminating that kid shouldn't have posed you any problem. What is your excuse for this?"

"Calm down, Master." Odysseus then summoned an arrow and drew his bow. His eyes were piercing through Leo as though he was made of glass. "It is simply that this young man over there has a trick up his sleeve."

It was now or never.

"Je n'existe pas!"

Leo only had one true and tried tactic to get out of trouble. He had known from the first moment that these two were not going to be his friends, and so he had been waiting for an opportunity. It was very dangerous still, so he had waited to see how things would unfold. But now his life was only hanging by his ability to get the hell out of here as fast as possible.

Thus, after turning invisible he broke into a sprint to escape.

That was what he got for walking around without Galahad to protect him. Speaking of the latter, the best solution would have been to forcefully summon him by his side. That had been the first thing Leo had thought of, naturally – unfortunately, that was impossible right now, for the simple reason that the hand Lancer had severed was also the one containing his Command Seals. That had probably been no coincidence either. He had never expected that guy of all people to pull a dirty move like that, but he had no time to complain about it.

Unfortunately...

"An admirable endeavor, if a futile one." Odysseus hummed. "How many trickeries do you think I've had to contend with before?"

All of sudden, a powerful gale swipped across the edge of the Ark and hit Leo. There was already a lot of wind here because of the altitude but this was something completely different: Odysseus was the one who had unleashed it and, although it didn't hurt Leo, the illusion keeping him hidden was forcibly ripped apart.

Calmly, the bowman took aim and fired his arrow within the same movement.

This time, Leo didn't even have the time to close his eyes.

* Umineko – Answer

"Don't just stand there with your mouth wide open, dumbass."

"Uh...?"

The arrow had hit with a resounding thunk, which was not a noise flesh was supposed to make. There hadn't been any miscalculation on Odysseus' part, the projectile had flown straight toward Leo at sonic speed. It just so happened that someone else was standing in the way – the arrow had planted itself not into Leo's chest but into Hatsuyo's back. The latter didn't even seem to care: instead of parrying or deflecting it, she had grabbed Leo by the collar and lifted him up.

Then, she whispered something into his ear.

Upon hearing this, Leo blinked.

"Hu– Wait, hold on a sec–!"

"You're on your own now!" Without waiting for his approval she chucked him into the air and over the railing.

Now that the stubborn idiot was finally out of this, that was one less weight Hatsuyo had to deal with.

Seriously, in that situation trying to run away from an expert marksman was the worse idea he could have had. And if she had intercepted the arrow instead of taking it, Odysseus would have had the time to fire a second one and he wouldn't have missed this time. Not that she'd had to take a hit for that guy, mind you.

Well, what was done was done.

And the price for that not a small one: the only reason why Hatsuyo had survived the arrow without a scratch was thanks to the armour Völundr had made for her. It had served her well throughout the entire war – against Linandir and Savrance in particular – but it would seem that this was its limit: cracks spread from where she had been hit and the armour on her upper body crumbled apart. That was only fitting; if that armour had been given a choice, it would probably have refused to help her at all.

She understood that, so she wasn't going to cry over it.

Instead, she turned around to face the bowman who couldn't help but sigh.

"What is the meaning of this?" Odysseus asked slowly. "If I am not mistaken, you said yourself that you would have no qualm eliminating your old comrades. And at the time, I believed – no, I knew it to be true. Then, you shouldn't have seen any problem with killing him as well."

Hatsuyo clicked her tongue.

"Yeah, I can kill that dumbass whenever I like. I'll get rid of anyone if they're in my way. However..." She brought her hand to her scabbard. "Who said you were allowed to do it?"

"Are you still not aware of your position? I'd thought you ready to do anything once you have an objective in sight. No..." Odysseus's gaze sharpened. "Could it be I was mistaken? I was...?"

"You're wasting your breath, Archer." Elena glared in Hatsuyo's direction. "She knows what she just did, so let's not pretend we don't know what she wants."

"...Certainly, after such a display, it becomes hard to deny it..." Odysseus nodded with some bitterness.

"I don't need you to deny anything." Hatsuyo bared her blade and brandished it toward him. "Or did you think I'm the type to let it slide when you piss me off?"

Hatsuyo hadn't had the time to finish that sentence that Odysseus had fired several arrows at her. She didn't so much as flinch however: before these projectiles could ever dream of hitting her, they were reduced to pieces and fell to the ground harmlessly. On the other hand, Odysseus was forced to move away – had he done so a fraction of a second later, he would have been bisected from the top of his head down. The Archer had returned to his Master's side while Lancer came back to Hatsuyo.

"Oi, oi, oi! Don't act like I'm not here!" Lancer barked at his opponent. That being said, he had a huge smile while saying that. "Ya got my heart racin' here, my lord! Though, if ya had been plannin' it from the start, ya should have told me. I only cut the kiddo's hand 'cause those guys were watching, ya know?"

"That's entirely your fault." She grumbled.

"S'that so? Well, if ya say it, then that's how it must be!" He laughed it off and turned his attention to Odysseus. "I've been itchin' to do it since the first time we fought, ya damn trickster! Ya better be ready, I don't want this to be over in a blink!"

Meanwhile, Elena was scolding her Servants.

"It was all a waste of time in the end." She retrieved more cross-shaped gems from her pocket. "All those efforts weren't worth anything."

"I disagree. We did get the intended result out of them, so I am ready to call it a success to some extent." On his end, the bowman materialized several more arrows in his hand. "Besides, if I were not able to get rid of them, I would not have picked them in the first place."

"Those are some fightin' words!" Lancer cracked his neck with anticipation; he glanced at Hatsuyo with some reservation though. "I can't really guarantee anythin', Master. I'll kill that bastard for sure, but I can't look after ya."

"You weren't supposed to."

Hatsuyo dusted off the last bits of armour sticking to her clothes and held her sword with both hand.

"Humans, beasts or even gods – if they're in my way, I'll cut them down."

Thank you for reading.

I have nothing to add, really. By the way, if any of you are confused about the quotes at the end of the first scene in this chapter, please refer to Chapter IX, Interlude XIV, Chapter XLVI and Chapter XLVII.

~Legends Storyteller