Chapter 100

Amanda hovered hesitantly in front of S'Kelnek's door, unsure how to proceed. She needed his help, that was certain, but she had no idea what to give in return. She had given away her rights to the water source she had found and was already in his debt for his tutelage.

Before she could think on it further, the door was opened by one of his attendants.

"My lady, Master S'Kelnek will see you," she said quietly.

Surprised, Amanda walked inside leaving I-Chaya to wait patiently in the corridor.

Amanda sat across from her master as he meditated. The air was heavy with incense which meant that he had been sat here for quite some time. She tried to breathe slowly and not cough whilst she waited for his attention.

After several minutes, his eyes flickered open.

"You caused quite an intrigue last night by declining to attend the diplomatic dinner," he said witheringly.

Amanda kept her gaze on the floor just before her knees. She'd pushed that matter so far into the back of her mind that she had forgotten S'Kelnek would also disapprove. Taking too long to respond, he added:

"You do not need me to tell you that such behavior is unbecoming of the Ambassador's wife. Yet perhaps I have granted your intelligence too much credibility over the last few months."

Amanda couldn't help curling her hands in her lap. It was a long time ago when she would have retaliated quickly to such an insult but she was wiser than that now. She had to accept the consequences of her actions.

"It was not a fault of my intelligence but a lack of due diligence, Osu. I made the mistake of agreeing to two events without realizing that they would occur at the same time."

She found herself sagging at her own admission. Not exactly a great introduction to the diplomatic corps demonstrating what would be perceived as a human weakness.

"Your attendants should have prevented that from happening," he said gravely. "T'Sang is the eldest, correct?" he asked.

Amanda nodded.

"She has made no error yet. To suddenly make one of this magnitude is unusual. Did something happen?" he asked, lowering his gaze on her.

Amanda had to consciously stop herself from squirming. She swallowed.

"I have been working her too hard," she said lamely, hoping that he wouldn't see through her lie. "I'm giving her a rest period before she will return to her responsibilities."

S'Kelnek looked as if he would question her further but appeared to change his mind.

"And what will you do now to recover from this incident?" he asked.

Amanda let out a deep breath, relieved to return to a subject she was more comfortable discussing.

"I plan to remedy the situation by sending a letter of apology to the host and to invite them and the rest of the corps to a dinner that I will host two weeks from now," she said.

S'Kelnek looked at her appraisingly.

"You are aware of the membership count within the diplomatic corps?" he asked.

"Yes, there are 205," she responded.

"And you have experience in hosting a dinner of that size?"

Amanda clenched her jaw. Of course she didn't, she'd only ever been an aide supporting on the sidelines.

"No, which is why I will be enlisting help from others who are more experienced in this area."

S'Kelnek nodded.

"And the Ambassador approves of this plan?" he asked.

Amanda's eyes dropped to the floor.

"I… I haven't had the opportunity to speak with him on it yet. But I'm sure he will agree," she said, trying to look calm and in control.

Another pause ensued where she was at the mercy of S'Kelnek's piercing stare.

"You must be sure not to err this time. When you fail it does not only disgrace the Ambassador but myself as well," he warned.

Amanda bowed her head forward.

"I will not disgrace you again," she said.

She waited for a further reprimand but none came. Still, she kept her head lowered in deference. After a couple of minutes, he spoke once more.

"However, I sense these recent events are not what has brought you here. What is it that you really wanted to speak with me about?" he asked.

Amanda straightened and steeled herself for a negative response to her next request.

"I realize that I am already greatly indebted to you, Osu, for your time, wisdom and teaching but I have one further request to make of you," she said, working hard to keep her voice level.

S'Kelnek's face didn't move a muscle.

"Proceed," he permitted.

Well, it's all or nothing, Amanda thought to herself.

"I wish to fund a student's audition and application to the guild of Uralaun. I have funds for this but I wish to do it discreetly as an anonymous beneficiary. I do not want the application to be tainted by being associated with me," she explained.

S'Kelnek considered her carefully for a moment.

"What is your underlying motivation for this? What has Socran done to earn your support in this way?" he asked.

Amanda's eyes widened. She should have expected that he would be able to figure out who the applicant would be. She had underestimated him again.

"I have had the opportunity to hear him perform. He has a unique talent that should be celebrated. I would not want him to miss his true calling because of a boy's cruel prank."

"So he has earned your sympathy. But why go to this much effort? Perhaps he will not be able to apply this year but he is still young. Another three or five years will make little difference," S'Kelnek said dismissively.

"Because a talent such as his should be appreciated for as long as possible. I believe he is just as rare as finding a water source."

"That is a bold claim for someone who has no experience in the art of Uralaun," he said, disapproving.

"Then let me at least support the audition so that you may hear him sing and judge for yourself. If I am wrong, I will not support the application to the guild."

S'Kelnek closed his eyes for a moment appearing to meditate briefly before opening them to speak once more.

"Even if I agreed to support you in this unnecessary endeavor, there is still the matter of what you would offer to me in recompense. Do you have a proposal?" he asked.

Amanda squeezed her hands tightly together. Just as before when she was outside of the corridor, she could think of nothing that she could offer him.

"I do not have a proposal, Osu. I have nothing further of value that I can offer you in return. The only thing that I can offer is my service whenever you should need it," she said.

"I already possess that as you are my student," he said sharply.

Amanda winced. She knew this had been a bad idea. Her heart sank. She was about to apologize for taking up his time and ask him to forget about the whole thing when he spoke:

"I will consider your request. Leave me now and I will summon you when I have made a decision," he said authoritatively.

He waved his hand dismissively and Amanda took that as her cue to leave.

Late that evening, Amanda struggled to sleep. She felt hot all over despite the temperature being cool in the night time air. In frustration she threw off the bed sheet and sat crouched on the side of the bed, forcing herself to take some deep breaths.

Sarek was not in the bedroom. She had not seen him at the evening meal and when she had decided to skip the great hall for the night he wasn't to be found in their rooms either.

Trying to breathe out her unease, Amanda moved to the living area with the intention of cooling off in front of the ventilator. Poking her head around the archway she found the room dark and unoccupied. It appeared he would not be coming home tonight. Amanda sighed.

She sat in front of the ventilator and breathed a sigh of relief as cool air bathed her face. It was not as effective as a splash of water but it was as close as she was going to get. For a long time she just stared into the blackness of the teardrop shape until her eyes defocussed. She was tired but she couldn't sleep with this anxiety coursing through her veins.

Sighing, her eyes roved the room until they rested finally on her satchel. She knew her mind wouldn't still until she had reconciled with Sarek and spoken to him about T'Sang. It would only be so long before her absence aroused suspicion. And she would need her portfolio back to continue her studies.

Amanda eased herself up stiffly from the floor before grabbing the satchel. She hastily threw on a robe and cloak before stepping outside. She guessed his refuge lay in his office so began the long walk in that direction.

The diplomatic offices were almost deserted at this time of night. Handing over her satchel to the security guard at the entrance along with her ID badge identifying her as cultural attaché she was scanned and permitted entry.

The interior was paneled with obsidian and the central corridor towered several stories high to a now gloomy skylight. Amanda consulted the list of offices before finding an elevator to Sarek's floor. The sound of her shoes clipped softly as she walked, echoing in the empty chamber.

Finding the entrance to his office suite, Amanda raised her badge against the security scanner to gain access. The door slid open and Amanda recognized a familiar reception room with desks for two aides that sat there unoccupied next to a small waiting area. Espying a more ornately decorated doorway she moved to it and gently pushed to see if it was locked. The door swung open and Amanda walked into a dimly lit room. The desk was empty however on the other side lay one of the teardrop shaped ventilators she was so familiar with. In the ring of seating surrounding it she recognized Sarek kneeling there with Se'tek at his side.

At her intrusion they both looked up from the PADDs they had been reviewing. Se'tek stood immediately, no longer wearing the silver sash she had seen him in previously.

"Lady Sarek, what a welcome surprise," he said respectfully, inclining his head towards her.

Amanda allowed a small smile to pull at her lips.

"It is good to see you too, Se'tek," she said.

She would have asked after his newborn but was aware that now wasn't the time for catching up. She walked forward to her husband who rose from his seat as she approached. It was hard to read his expression in the dim light.

"I apologize for intruding at such a late hour…" she paused as she considered which title to say. She chose to play it safe as he was at his workplace. "Ambassador."

He didn't respond so she continued.

"If I may have a moment of your time, there is something important I need to discuss with you," she explained.

There was a moment of silence before Se'tek made to depart, he nodded his head to her as he passed.

After the door closed shut behind her, Amanda watched as Sarek consulted his PADD. The light in the room suddenly brightened so Amanda could see more clearly. She looked to her husband's face to see a considerably cool expression residing there.

"Thank you," she said gratefully.

He gestured toward the seating area.

"Sit," he instructed.

Amanda knelt down on one of the seats and placed the satchel in her lap. As was customary, she waited for him to speak first. As she waited, she noticed a muscle flicker in his jaw as he saved his work and cleared his applications. He was tired.

Finally finished, he turned off the PADD and returned his gaze to her.

"What is it that you wish to discuss?" he asked.

Amanda ran her fingers across her satchel but decided not to broach that topic first.

"Before that, I must apologize. I am truly sorry that I missed the diplomatic meal and that I embarrassed you in front of your colleagues. Regardless of the fact that you are an Ambassador, as your wife I always want to be there to support you. I made a mistake that fills me with deep regret and I will do whatever it takes to remedy the situation."

She paused to take a breath for a moment to calm the swirl of emotion in her chest.

"I'm also sorry for the following argument. I was angry at myself for letting this happen," she added.

She looked directly into his eyes and filled her next words with as much sincerity as she could muster.

"I have never wanted to disappoint you," she swallowed. "So… I'm sorry," she trailed off.

Her eyes slid back to the floor again, unable to hold his gaze any longer. She hoped that her words would be enough. Her throat felt tight as she waited for his reply.

"You have always held yourself to high standards, even as my aide" he said finally.

Amanda looked up to find his eyes had softened towards her.

"Well, you did challenge me to exceed your expectations," she sniffed ruefully.

"A difficult task, indeed," he agreed.

He reached out his fingers, offered in the ozh'esta. Amanda removed her glove to complete it. As their fingers touched, he spoke:

"I know it was not your intention to cause me any disgrace. You are too kind for that."

Amanda smiled lightly as he let their hands drop.

"However, I do request that you be more careful in future. I will require you to attend all future events unless it is an emergency," he said firmly. "As there may come a time where I will be indisposed and will need you to represent me and the Vulcan people in my absence," he said, eyes grave with responsibility.

Amanda nodded. She would help him carry this burden.

"I will do as you ask," she agreed.

"Good."

Amanda noticed an almost imperceptible easing of tension in his shoulders. She herself, also felt a weight lifted off her chest.

"I have heard from S'Kelnek your plans for hosting a diplomatic dinner two weeks hence," he said.

Amanda smirked. What a gossip, she thought to herself.

"It is a bold decision given your lack of experience in this area however if it is bold enough it could eclipse your previous error. I shall send you the names of some people who can help you with the hospitality and so forth," he said, already returning to the efficient problem solver he was. "You do realize that with this move, you will be the center of attention," he reminded her.

Amanda nodded.

"I understand. I realize that I will be expected to provide some cultural enrichment so I have already enlisted T'Pen to choreograph a dance that we can perform together."

Amanda knew the next couple of weeks would be hell but she knew T'Pen wouldn't allow her to fail. Sarek nodded, approving.

"Would you do me the honor of playing at the dinner?" she asked, a little worried he might say no as they had only recently returned to peaceful ground.

"Naturally," he agreed.

Amanda smiled. It now felt like finally everything was going to be ok. That feeling lasted only a short time though as she remembered the satchel containing T'Sang's inflammatory portfolio resting against her thighs.

"If we could postpone discussing the rest of the event until tomorrow, we have a difficult situation that I am not sure how to resolve," she said, worried.

"What is it?" he asked.

Amanda pondered for a moment the best way to explain it but decided to let him draw his own conclusions. She slipped the portfolio out of her satchel.

"T'Sang's portfolio?" he said curiously. "Why do you have this on your person?"

"Take a look and then you will understand."

She handed the portfolio to him and watched intently as he worked his way through each page of her drawings. He turned the pages slower as he began perusing the drawings of himself. He glanced up at her.

"She has captured my likeness well," he observed.

Amanda cocked her head.

"Mmhmm," she agreed, waiting for him to reach the end.

As he began turning page after page of depictions of himself, Amanda watched carefully for any change in his expression but saw nothing. When he finally reached the last page instead of slamming it shut as she had done, he stared at it for some time.

After a couple of minutes of silence. He closed the portfolio and placed it on the low table in front of them before resting his fingertips together in a thoughtful pose.

"Well?" Amanda asked, feeling a little impatient.

Sarek considered his words before speaking.

"She has been very… thorough in the study of her subject," he said softly, gazing into the distance.

Amanda thought that was considering it too lightly.

"Sarek, I think this is more than just a committed artist trying to capture her subject's personality in a portrait," she said.

His eyes searched hers.

"I do not think it unusual. Artists have spent many a millennia depicting the nude form," he explained, as if this was all completely logical.

Amanda tried not to let the frustration get to her at his seeming reluctance to acknowledge the situation.

"Then why only you, Sarek? She has seen me plenty of times in the nude and not once am I drawn in these pages," she said, gesturing to the offending book in question. "She couldn't keep her eyes off you when you came out of the sonic shower the other day. The tips of her ears went green when I caught her at it. She was blushing, Sarek. I can't believe I didn't recognize it when I first saw it."

Amanda sat back on her heels and sighed.

"I believe she has a crush on you," she said finally.

"Infatuation?" he asked.

Amanda nodded.

"Yes, exactly that."

They sat quietly for a moment, trying to process it all.

"I worry…" Amanda said, "that as we both relied on her to be a communication link between us it has pushed you both closer together than I anticipated."

She swallowed.

"You share a communal bond with her. Did you notice anything unusual when speaking with her?" she asked curiously.

Sarek stood up to walk to a nearby narrow window in the outer wall of his office and clasped his arms behind his back. The night was pitch black outside. He looked down for a moment.

"She was always very diligent in completing my requests and kept me well informed of your activities. The only emotion I ever detected significantly through the bond was excitement but as she was new to her role and still young, I did not consider it to be something to be concerned about."

Amanda pondered for a moment.

"She never seemed to follow you around or try to get your attention more than necessary?" she asked.

Sarek shook his head.

"Our communication was always efficient and the majority of which was initiated by me."

He turned to look at her.

"You are certain of this? Such an attachment in one so young could have damaging consequences."

Amanda cast her mind back to the argument she had had with T'Sang.

"Yes, I'm certain. But we should not be so heavy handed with managing this. I would think it's quite common in children her age. It will pass in time but we need to consider our next steps carefully."

"What do you suggest?" he asked.

Amanda rubbed her eyes wearily before looking at him once more.

"We should try to arrange for her to become an attendant to another family. We can't do so immediately without raising suspicion but the longer she stays with us the longer it will last and the more painful it will be for her."

"You will require a new attendant to take her place."

"I know. And it will be difficult to replace her but we must," she said firmly.

The last thing they needed was for this to be noticed by the other clan members and the rumor mill to start turning. Amanda stifled a yawn.

"I will make some discreet inquiries with T'Arris tomorrow to see if she has any suggestions for a new attendant," he decided.

"There's the more immediate problem that she is hiding from us at present," she said.

Amanda stood and walked over to stand next to him by the window.

"Can you speak to her? And please… let her down gently," she urged.

Sarek looked at her wonderingly.

"Would it not be better for you to speak with her?" he asked.

"She will fear a rebuke from me. Our last parting was not something I am proud of. I need you to let her know that I am not upset with her and that we want her to return to us."

Amanda sighed.

"I will make amends by finding her a new family that will be to her benefit."

Sarek's lips drew into a thin line as he accepted this task.

"Very well. I will speak with her."