Nikki smiled sitting on the edge of the dock with her feet in the water, Brett, Nathan and Owen were swimming with the five kids, the two toddlers bobbing in life jackets. Meghan took a seat beside Nikki and let her feet dangle in the cool water.

"Where's Teddy," Nikki asked.

"Helping mom," Meghan replied, "something's bugging her."

"They're finding Allison's diagnosis hard," Nikki shrugged, "Owen has at least seen it. I was 16 before Teddy saw it a lot."

"And Danny doesn't really talk," Meghan said, "I think the autism idea is stressing her out."

"Better to test him now," Nikki said, "I see some behaviours but I don't know. It doesn't look like it to me. I think sensory or communication, not autism. I don't see where the daycare is getting autism. Brett and I have had him a lot this summer. I just don't see it."

"It's Teddy," Meghan said, "she thinks it reflects on her as a parent."

"No," Nikki said, "it just is. It happens, no one knows why. None of us have it easy."

"Nope," Meghan agreed, "you hide it."

"I'm a duck," Nikki said, "I'm calm on the surface but I'm scrambling underneath. They don't know. They go for an assessment. She can't panic yet."

"It's something hurting someone she loves," Meghan said.

"I know," Nikki said, "I panicked when we got the asthma diagnosis. To you guys that's calm and manageable but I don't have the medical background."

"It's controlled," Meghan asked.

"It is," Nikki said, "Teddy helped figure it out and our pediatrician is good. We're having a hard time figuring out how to approach an idea."

"What's the idea," Meghan asked.

"Brett wants to adopt Ty," Nikki said, "I want him to. Look at them."

"It's father and son," Meghan agreed, "what's stopping you."

"Jeff," Nikki groaned, "we do the adoption, he's out of my life for good. But I have to fight him to give up his parental rights."

"Do you think he will," Meghan asked.

"He'll say no to spite me," Nikki said, "but it would mean no more lawyers, court dates or fighting for child support."

"How is that still a problem," Meghan asked.

"He quit his job when they started garnishing his wages and it hasn't caught up with him yet," Nikki said, "it's not worth it anymore. I do okay."

"Brett," Meghan asked.

"Were fine. It's a joint account," Nikki said, "only thing he can't touch is the part of the settlement still in trust."

"What did you take out." Meghan asked.

"About half the house," Nikki replied, "he took the same."

"You don't have a mortgage," Meghan asked.

"Small," Nikki said, "mostly the renovations. And we're paying two PhD tuitions. Most of my masters was bursaries and scholarships ."

"How did you do your masters on scholarships," Meghan asked.

"Single mom," Nikki admitted.

Teddy was sitting in the campsite with Evelyn.

"Is everything alright darling," Evelyn asked.

"No," Teddy admitted.

Evelyn moved to the chair beside Teddy, "what's wrong?"

"I'm failing as a mom," Teddy admitted, "I have no clue what I'm doing wrong but my kids aren't doing well."

"Allison is thriving so is Amber," Evelyn said.

"Daniel might be autistic," Teddy said, "and I know it's not cancer or life threatening but he's still my baby. I look at him and Ty and Tyler is so much more outgoing and talkative. Tyler's language is way ahead of Daniel."

"I've had all three of yours a lot lately," Evelyn said, "Amber talks for Daniel. Make him talk for himself. We went through it with Nikki, Meghan would talk for her."

"Eye contact " Teddy said, "his coordination is behind Tyler."

"Stop comparing the two boys," Evelyn said, "he also separats from you easier he's a lot more secure that your coming back if you go overnight."

"I've always had to leave mine over nights to be on call since they were babies," Teddy said, "he hasn't had the one on one time with me the girls did."

"Teddy you're being too hard on yourself," Evelyn said, "relax. Your kids are fine. Daniel is a two year old boy. He reminds me a lot of Owen at that age."

"The daycare wants him assessed," Teddy said, "they know Allison has adhd so they think something is wrong with him."

"What have they said," Evelyn asked.

"He's not making friends, lack of eye contact, his speech isn't quite where it needs to be," Teddy said, "he bounces a lot and spins."

"Have you talked to Nikki," Evelyn asked.

"She said to look into the speech and sensory and talk to the pediatrician," Teddy said, "but the staff at daycare has changed and I'm not happy."

"Is there space where Tyler is," Evelyn asked.

"If we could look I know she was really selective and is happy with them," Teddy said, "we see the pediatrician next week for screening."

"Talk to them and try another daycare," Evelyn said.

"We will," Teddy said, she began to cry, "nothing we do helps Allison make and keep friends. She just doesn't connect with the other girls."

"Is she still interested in Pac Rim," Evelyn asked.

"She is," Teddy said, "we're looking at the middle school program. I don't know. We're not sold on the academics. She's starting fourth . So she would go in two years. They cut their fifth grade program."

"That program was small; they only took 20," Evelyn said.

"It's the adhd will they be able to support her," Teddy asked, "what about her IEP?"

"They always had one in place for Nikki," Evelyn said, "it was Mrs Payton when Nikki was there. She was good with adhd. Her adhd will be harnessed at Pac Rim. Teddy she'll alternate between academic and dance blocks. She's okay."

"Why can't she make friends," Teddy asked.

"She's super sensitive," Evelyn said, "we know another one who was like that. Does Allison have one or two best friends."

"Bella and Ava from dance," Teddy said, "nice girls."

"Corinna and Sydney," Evelyn said, "Julie."

"I just want her to feel good about herself," Teddy said, "she comes home crying from school everyday. She's already panicking about back to school and being with the kids that tease her. I don't know how to help. I can't watch her come home Crying everyday."

"I know," Evelyn said, "it's hard to watch. Teddy I know it's hard to watch your kids struggle. Sometimes you just have to let yourself cry with them."

"I just want to make it better," Teddy said, "she hates the medication."

"Don't do it," Evelyn said, "we stopped medicating Nikki when she decided she didn't like it. Dance, swimming lessons, music. Just be there."

"How do I fix it," Teddy asked.

"That's the worst part Teddy," Evelyn said, "you can't take this away from them. They have to do it and figure it out. Allison was talking to Nikki this morning about it. They were drawing."

"I heard. I gave them space," Teddy said, "I don't know how to help her. I can untangle the web with her but she wants her mind to slow down. She says her thoughts go too fast and she wants them to slow down."

"Help her find an activity that slows her down," Evelyn said, "what does she gravitate to?"

"Her flute and dancing," Teddy said.

"Encourage that," Evelyn said, "the more she moves the better. She's okay."

"I hate it because I'm failing as a mom," Teddy said, "I let her down. I let Danny down."

"Teddy you're a great mom. This is being a good mom. Feeling all of their hurts and their pain that's the hardest part of this. Your kids will be okay," Evelyn said, "Allison will be fine. I had a lot of these nights when I questioned if I could do it. It won't be easy but being a mom is hard. What do you need?"

"For them to be happy," Teddy said.

"They are," Evelyn said, "and so loved."

Teddy continued to cry. Evelyn wrapped her in a hug and held her. Teddy was often the strong one, the rock for the family but she had hit her breaking point.

Back at the dock a pair of women walked down followed by a herd of children.

"It's Meghan," one woman whispered.

"She wouldn't dress like that," Batool said.

Nikki and Meghan were both sitting in their bathing suits and floppy sun hats.

"Meg are you coming in," Nathan called.

"Come on Nikki," Brett yelled.

"Mommy come," Tyler said, "please."

"When you ask like that," Nikki said, putting her hat and sunglasses on the towel pile and sliding into the water.

She swam towards her son and fiancé letting them splash her before grabbing the second pool noodle from Brett to float on. Tyler bobbed happily in his life jacket between his parents.

"Meghan," Batool called.

"Batool, Noor," Meghan said, "I wasn't expecting to see you here."

The two women tried to speak to Meghan in Arabic she insisted on English.

"Meg," Nathan said swimming over.

"Batool, Noor, this is my husband Dr Nathan Riggs," Meghan introduced.

"What are you doing here," Noor asked.

"Family camping trip," Meghan said, "with my mom, siblings and their families."

"Where are they," Noor asked.

Meghan pointed, "that's Nikki, her fiancé Brett and their son Tyler. Then Owen and his kids Allison, Amber and Daniel. Owen's wife Teddy is up helping my mom at the campsite."

Faroke saw the other kids and heard them speaking Arabic and raced over hauling himself onto the dock.

"Faroke go back with Uncle Owen and Auntie Nikki," Meghan commanded.

"Who is Nikki," Noor asked, "you called your sister squirt."

"She hates being called that now. She's 27. I was 28 when I was captured," Meghan said.

"Are you okay," Noor asked.

"I'm back with my family," Meghan said, "we should take our kids back soon for lunch."

"Meg, do you want me to take Faroke back," Nikki asked, swimming to the dock.

"I'll come back," Meghan said.

"Can you stay," Noor asked.

"No," Meghan said, "I told my mom I would help with lunch."

"You don't cook," Batool said.

"I do," Meghan said, "this is my real life."

"I've been back a year and we still havent had tea," Batool said, "we haven't gotten the kids together."

"We won't," Meghan said, "I'm with my family and my friends. I was not with you by choice. Your husbands held me there against my will."

"Meghan let's go," Nathan said, putting his arm around her waist.

"I'm ready," Meghan said.

"Faroke let's go," Nathan said.

"Please dad," Faroke tried.

"You heard your mom the answer is no," Nathan said, "we are going back to the campsite and helping grandma with lunch."

"Dad," Faroke whined.

"I'm counting to five and your shoes will be on," Nathan commanded, "one, two, three."

Faroke had his shoes on. He looked over his shoulder at the kids he had grown up with as Meghan and Nathan marched him away.

"We should go up and make sure she's okay," Nikki said to Brett.

"She's with Nate she's okay," Brett said, "stay here."

They swam for a bit longer before Tyler had enough of the water, they lifted him onto the dock and they walked back followed by Owen with his kids.

Arriving back at the campsite Owen found Teddy sitting in her camping chair staring at the empty fire pit wiping tears from her eyes.

"Teddy," Owen asked, "what's wrong?"

Teddy shook her head, "not here."

"I'm going to get dry clothes then we'll go for a walk," Owen said, "just us. Mom can you watch the kids?"

"I will," Evelyn agreed.

Owen quickly changed to dry clothes and took Teddy's hand leading her away.

"What's going on Teds," Owen asked.

"I'm failing you, I'm failing our kids and I don't know how to fix it," Teddy whined.

"How," Owen asked, "our kids are happy and healthy. I thought we were happy."

"Allison, Daniel it's all my fault," Teddy said.

"How," Owen asked again.

"Her ADHD that's on me. I'm her mom, I must have messed up somewhere," Teddy said.

"No," Owen said, "that's on my side. Nikki, I have traits, Faroke is being tested, Nikki sees traits in Tyler but he's too young to test."

"It's not getting better," Teddy said.

"What she does now is why Nikki used to annoy the crap out of me when she was a kid. It was bad enough having a baby sister so much younger then when she was her I didn't understand. I understand now that the energy and the impulsivity is part of the gifted adhd package," Owen said, "the very big feelings. We've seen it before and seen that the person can be great. I also need to apologize to Nikki for not understanding it when we were younger."

"It just feels like I let her down," Teddy said.

"No," Owen said, "Teddy you're there every day helping her untangle the web."

"She thinks she's worthless and no one loves her," Teddy said, "that inferiority complex is starting. She's nine she's in fourth grade and already thinks she's less then her classmates that she's worthless."

"Then we show her," Owen said, "we taught one to find her own value."

"And we also watched that one get abused by her boyfriend because she didn't think she deserved better," Teddy snapped.

"And now we know better," Owen said, "we know how to help. Allison will be fine. We could try a counselor if that helps."

"I just want her to realize that she isn't alone and how much we all love her and thing she's amazing," Teddy replied.

"That's the hardest part of watching a kid with adhd we can be there but we've never done it," Owen said, "maybe when we get home we talk to Nikki. I can't take Allison asking me to cut the broken part of her brain out. She wants me to operate and fix it. There's nothing to fix."

"Amelia Shepard is doing a new study based off Derek's," Teddy said.

"That helped it made Nikki feel like it had value and purpose," Owen said, "talk to her. I can and let her know we know where one of the original participants is."

"I don't want to make her feel more different then she already does," Teddy said, "I don't think it's a good idea to have her be Amelia's guinea pig. If she was older and understood what it meant."

"What if we explained it," Owen said, "it helped Nikki to understand how her brain worked. Maybe if we teach Allison."

"Nikki was 16-20 doing that not 9," Teddy said, "I know you want to help but I don't think she's old enough."

"Let's talk to Amilia and to psych and see," Owen said, "we can give her the choice. What if we showed her the scans from Derek's study?"

"She's too young," Teddy said, "she's not interested."

"Meds aren't working for her," Owen said, "do we try something else?"

"We've tired three," Teddy replied, "counselling, your mom suggested no meds for a while. She's been off them all summer and is happier. I just don't know about school though."

"Try it," Owen said, "give it a month and if it's not going well we put her back on it?"

"Your mom suggested that," Teddy said, "I want to seriously consider the Pac Rim program as soon as possible. They were so good with Nikki's and giving her what she needed to succeed. She'll be one of 30 in her grade instead of 300. The whole school sixth to seniors is 300-400 kids. Blue Pine is 1000 at least the high school is over 2000. Maybe smaller where people will know Allison would work."

"I still worry about the academics at Pac Rim," Owen said, "math not so much it's the teacher Nikki had she's consulting with them but the rest."

"Are there other schools maybe Medowcrest isn't the right fit," Teddy asked, "where she might do better?"

"We can look into it," Owen said, "Teddy we can't fix this now."

"I want her to feel good about herself. We watched for years as Nikki doubted her worth. I can't see Allison do that. I can't see our daughter beat herself up and think she's worthless, that she doesn't deserve to be loved or treated well. I'm already hearing that language of I'm just a dancer or I'm okay. She's already comparing herself to Amber and only sees her own shortcomings. Somewhere Allison has gotten the idea that it's all her fault because of her adhd. She's not happy she compares to Amber and Faroke and it's hurting her. I think a different school might help so she's not compared," Teddy said.

"Let's do it," Owen said, "we can move Ali to another school, maybe somewhere smaller. I know the smaller classes were why mom put Nikki at Pac Rim so the staff knew her and she had consistent teachers year to year."

"The school wants a psycho educational assessment they think she's stupid," Teddy said, "that's what I heard two education assistants saying that Allison Hunt isn't very bright."

"Let them assess," Owen said, "we get all the info. Treat it like a patient with both of ours that are getting assessed. We get the information then come up with a plan. Teddy I hate seeing it happen as much as you do. I'm blaming myself for both. Maybe if I had more time with Danny his language would be better but I don't think it's autism. He's meeting all his milestones except speech and my mom pointed out Amber talks for him. "

"So we get Amber to stop talking for him," Teddy asked.

"Try it and see," Owen agreed.

"I was talking with your mom and she suggested maybe trying a different day care for him," Teddy said, "his is pretty academic and structured. We've never been thrilled with it for any of our kids and it's really not a good fit for Danny. Maybe we look for something else?"

"Move Daniel and Allison and see if it helps," Owen said, "if we move Allison should we move Amber?"

"Don't move Amber," Teddy said, "I think separating so they don't compare might be good."

"Theres still a few weeks before school goes back," Owen said, "we can do it for september."

"I want to talk to Nikki about daycare," Teddy said, "what she looked for in a good one."

"We'll talk to her," Owen agreed.

"We're okay," Teddy asked.

"We are," Owen said.

"Can we do this," Teddy asked.

"We can," Owen said, "you're not doing this alone Teddy I'm here. You need to let me in on this."

"I am," Teddy said, "it's hard because I don't want you to blame me."

"There's no blame," Owen said, "we love our kids and they are who they are. I hate seeing them struggle but we can do this together. I'm going to say no to Richard making me chief. Its not the right time for our family. You and our kids need me home. It's not fair to my family for me to do that now."

"Owen it's your dream," Teddy said.

"No," Owen said, "you and our kids. That's what I wanted. Not now. When the kids are older. Not now."

"Are you sure," Teddy asked.

"I am," Owen said, "I'm thinking of switching to general, I can be a general surgeon."

"No," Teddy declared, "turn down Chief is one thing but to give up on what you're passionate about. You can't do that."

"And how much have you stepped back for me and the kids," Owen asked.

"Not the same Owen," Teddy said, "yes I take time off for our kids and don't research anymore but that's okay. I will when the kids get older."

"I want to step back so you can do that," Owen said.

"Let's both stay with what we have for now," Teddy said, "focus on the kids."

"We can do that," Owen agreed.

Teddy looped her arm around his waist as they continued to walk, he pulled her closer.

"I love you," Owen smiled.

"I love you too," Teddy replied.