Alistair woke, his eyes blinking at the bright light of the sun as it climbed through the trees. He could tell by its position that it was barely an hour after sunrise, and he merely sighed in resignation.

Some sort if internal bell always seemed to wake him at this hour, no matter how late he went to sleep, and he thought he should be used to it by now.

He got up, being as quiet as he could- after all, just because he was awake, did not mean all the others should be- and he began to stretch. He needed more and more stretching in the mornings, especially after sleeping on the ground.

"Didn't sleep well?"

Alistair turned, seeing Hawke and Fenris sitting near the fire. Both looked awake and alert, and he wondered if they had taken the last watch.

"Slept fine," he responded, as he pulled on the lining shirt of his armor. It was padded to help keep him comfortable while wearing the plate armor, but also provided warmth against the chill of the morning. He went to his knees and took a few moments to pack up his bedding.

"Oh really?" Hawke asked with a smirk as he finally made his way to the fire. The warrior was far from old, yet he surely acted the part. "The way you're moving says otherwise."

"You'd think I would be used to sleeping on the ground, wouldn't you?" Alistair replied, good-natured. "It's not as if we have beds to sleep in, except when we are at the Keep."

Hawke smiled, as it was difficult not to like the man. "Getting used to the comforts of command, are we?" he teased.

"Well, I was raised in a barn… literally," Alistair laughed. "I suppose I am simply used to a softer bed." He sat down on a stump next to Hawke. "So what's for breakfast?" he asked.

Hawke gave him a slap on the back. "I'd say that it was your turn to cook, but Duran warned me about that," he said with a laugh. "We're just waiting for Anders to get up and get it started."

"Why me?" Anders complained from his bedroll, even as he turned over and pulled the blanket over his head.

"That's what you get for being the best," Hawke replied jovially.

If anyone was still sleeping, the topic of breakfast had them all stirring. Hawke did what he could, and had put the kettle near the fire for hot water. But after years of complaints from his friends, he wasn't going to bother with trying to make the food.

"Come on Blondie, I'll help you," Varric said, as he got up and put on his boots. He looked over to where the two remaining wardens were packing up their sleeping gear, then back to the other side of camp, where Hawke's and Fenris' bedding still lay.

"Is that a warden thing, or what?" he asked.

Nathaniel glanced up, and saw what Varric was pointing to, and gave a shrug. "Habit, I suppose," he replied. "After you've lost your bedding because darkspawn interrupt your breakfast, you learn to be ready to leave, before you start eating."

The members of Hawke's party gave shrugs and nods, though Anders was still buried in blankets.

Nathaniel looked over, then pointedly gave Varric a wink. "However, I don't recall Anders being a very good cook… maybe I should handle breakfast instead."

The blankets rustled, as the mage shot up to a sitting position, glaring at the archer, his hair sticking up in every direction. "I seem to remember you eating every bite," he shot back, offended.

"Well, yes, as a warden, you eat when you can, and what you can," Nathaniel replied, turning back to his bedding, though Varric could see the smirk he wore. "I really don't mind, if you'd like to get some more sleep," he added.

Anders huffed, and got out of his bedding. He stormed off into the trees, with Hawke calling after him, "We all appreciate that you kept your smalls on this time!"

"Stuff it Hawke!" came the reply.

Hawke grinned at the others, then moved over to take care of his bedding. "I find it hard to believe that you didn't enjoy his cooking," he told Nathaniel in a quiet voice as he passed him.

"Oh, its great, no doubt," Nathaniel answered, just as quietly. He moved over to help Hawke pack up Anders' bedding, since he would handle the meal. "I was hungry though, so I wanted to get him moving."

They shared a laugh, helping to pack up the remains of the camp, while Anders and Varric got the food ready.

None of the men complained about the journey, not that any were expecting that to happen. They were all too well versed in travelling over land on foot for it to even be a thought. Some spent the time talking, others were quiet, but each respected the other's need for company or lack thereof, so they passed the time happily.

Varric waited, though he wouldn't say he was patient about it. He wanted stories, and he knew when to let others simmer, and when to raise the heat. He knew that they knew he would ask… he just needed to wait for the opportune time.

They spent the first day speaking of other things, and as men always do, the subject of women was broached. They all seemed to steer clear of talk of Cat, and when Hawke shared old stories, they could tell it was from a time when he was much younger, and not nearly as experienced with women.

Carver seemed to enjoy those stories, and in fact would bring some of them up. Yet even when Hawke was the butt of the joke, the story seemed to still show him as the hero of the tale, something that would have infuriated his sibling before, but no longer seemed to.

Varric was surprised, but he actually was fine with the younger Hawke's company. It was as if being a warden put everything into perspective for him, and the cares of the past no longer meant what they did. He couldn't help but be slightly impressed, and more than a little relieved.

"What about you, Duran?" Hawke asked, once he was out of stories to share. "There must be ladies that enjoy a dwarf in armor, am I right?" He gave the warden commander a grin, and wiggled his eyebrows in suggestion.

"Certainly," Duran agreed. "But I was never one for the chasers."

Nathaniel and Alistair started guffawing at that, causing Hawke's crew to eye them in confusion. Varric could see Sebastian's lips quirking upwards, and called him out.

"Choir Boy, if you know the joke, you shouldn't keep your friends in the dark," he pointed out.

"Of course Varric," Sebastian replied easily. He smiled at the wardens, then turned to Hawke. "I am uncertain if we mean the same thing… but my brothers would use that term for the women that were after a man for their… ahem, title."

"Ah…" Hawke said, as the others' started chuckling.

"Hawke has had his share of those," Anders spoke up with a grin. "In fact at Aveline's wedding, he hid behind a pillar to avoid a pair that was literally chasing him down."

"Oh… so awful," Hawke remembered with a shudder. "All I could do was run… they wouldn't listen to a word I said!"

"Are you seriously complaining about having women chase after your attention?" Carver asked with a frown.

"Not women," Nathaniel disagreed. "Vipers."

"Ah yes," Anders nodded. "Nathaniel was a nobleman's son once upon a time."

"There was one girl who didn't even like me, but her mother had filled her head with how wonderful her life could be, if only she could capture the heart of the heir to the Howe's fortune. Even telling her that I was the second son, and already betrothed did nothing to dissuade her," Nathaniel reminisced. "Very handsy," he commented, demonstrating by grabbing Alistair's arm and petting it.

Alistair shook him loose, giving a roll of his eyes. "Frankly, I'm happy I avoided all of that," he replied.

"How so?" Varric asked, innocently.

"Oh… uh," he stammered, looking to his friends for help.

"Alistair had a fairly noble father, though his mother's blood was not nearly as pure," Nathaniel said. He knew keeping quiet would just arouse curiosity, but a simple and vague answer would most likely drop the subject.

"Ah, a noble bastard then?" Varric asked, and received a nod from Alistair.

"I'm more than happy to just be a warden," Alistair replied fervently.

"What esteemed company we are keeping," Hawke replied, looking impressed. "And here I thought I was the only one that was avoiding the title they are trying to hang on me."

"What title?" Carver demanded.

"Something about bringing back the glory of the Amell line," Hawke replied. "Of course I have to denounce the Hawke side of my family to do so." He smirked, and looked to Varric. "I just don't think hearing everyone call me "Amell" would work."

"Definitely not," Varric responded, shaking his head. "I would have thought Leandra would be trying to get Trickster to become the new Lady Amell."

Hawke gave him an incredulous look. "And you thought that Charade would just meekly go along with that?" he asked.

Varric didn't hesitate. "Not a chance of that."

"Exactly."

"I'm still upset that I didn't get to meet this cousin you told me about," Carver spoke up. "And I find it incredibly hard to believe Uncle Gamlen had a woman, let alone a child."

"From what we can tell, she takes after her mother," Varric said, chuckling. "She doesn't remind me of Gamlen at all."

"That is what makes me think I will like her," Carver replied. "And besides, the Amell name was considered tainted by all of the mages born into our family. After cousin Marian was taken away by the templars, and Mother ran off with Father? It meant the end of the Amells in the noble circles," Carver explained. "I just don't see how giving the title to another mage will bring back the glory of the name, no offense, brother."

"None taken," Hawke replied. He knew his brother truly didn't mean to offend him, more that it made no logical sense.

"Honestly, the Champion of Kirkwall is very popular with the people," Sebastian spoke up. "More than likely the nobility simply want to claim Hawke as one of them, to further their idea that those that are special are of the nobility."

Hawke, having had enough discussion of his own family, decided to change the subject. And since Alistair was walking next to him, the poor sod was the target he chose.

"So Alistair…" Hawke said, having the warrior glance over to him. "I wanted to hear about what happened with you and Cat?" he asked.

Alistair blushed, his mouth opening and closing, though no sound came out. He searched around him for something…Anything! that he could use to change the topic, but he was not great at spur of the moment thoughts. Not in this situation at least.

"Uh… I don't know what you mean?" Alistair replied in a mumble. He knew he was sunk when Nathaniel and Duran both groaned, and shook their heads. They had been working with him for years on improving his lying skills, but he was hopeless in that regard.

"Well, as convincing as that was," Hawke replied with a grin. "I was actually talking about when Cat was with the wardens, she had told me how much you helped her, but wouldn't say much more. I just wondered what you said, or did that was such a help."

Alistair breathed a sigh of relief, until Hawke continued. "But that wouldn't cause such a reaction, so now my curiosity is piqued, I must admit."

Hawke wanted to go easy on him, but it was just so simple to get a reaction from him. He wasn't lying either, now he was curious as to what Alistair thought he meant. Knowing the reaction most men had to Cat, he wouldn't be surprised if the warrior and Cat had had something between them.

He couldn't see it still there, they were too close of friends.

Duran was the one to come to Alistair's rescue. He knew that they would eventually speak of Cat… she was the piece that held their groups together, much more than Carver ever would. She had integrated herself into their lives, without even trying.

"Did you know, that when I first met Cat, I had a lot of misgivings about her?" he began, and the group immediately went from noisy and teasing, to silent and attentive. They could all sense the change in the conversation.

Varric moved up a little, wanting to hear every word.

Duran smirked at Hawke. "I've heard your crew refer to themselves as your merry band of misfits," he said with a chuckle. "I like to think of my own group starting as something similar. At the start of the blight, Alistair and I were new wardens, not even a year in, and suddenly we were tasked with saving all of Ferelden.

"Not many believed in us, it would be difficult to do so when we didn't believe in ourselves. But we were all that Ferelden had, so we were determined to do our best."

Hawke walked along, ready to help keep Duran from walking into a tree- with how deeply the memories were pulling at him, he almost seemed as if he were reliving them. Hawke could hear the joy and sadness in equal measure, and he felt a kinship with the dwarf.

"We took whatever help we could find. First was an apostate mage-"

"An extremely angry apostate," Alistair cut in.

"She is definitely a handful," Duran agreed with a smile. He knew he and Alistair would never agree about Morrigan, though the two of them were much easier about the other now.

"A chantry initiate, a Qunari warrior, a dwarven berserker-"

This time it was Nathaniel who broke in. "A drunk," he added, to which Anders chuckled, and agreed wholeheartedly.

"Who is telling this?" Duran asked his friends.

"Sorry," the pair replied, though they smiled.

"So there we were. We were traveling from Redcliff to the Circle of Magi to gain the assistance and alliance of the mages. To make it even more of a challenge, the man who was trying to take over the throne declared all wardens as criminals, so we were constantly being attacked."

He looked to Alistair, nodding for him to continue, so he did. "We were already on alert, because of some random encounter with a woman, claiming to have bandits attacking her wagon. We started to follow her, and she ran off into the trees."

"Trap," Hawke commented, giving a knowing nod.

"Most definitely," Fenris agreed.

"We thought the same," Alistair nodded. "So we were going carefully. Suddenly to our left, we heard screaming and another woman ran from the trees, straight at us." He gave a grin at the memory. "She kept looking back, and almost ran right into my shield. I had to drop it, and stop her with my arm."

He shook his head. "She was looking around, like she was trying to find a weapon, and she started backing away from me, as if I was going to attack her. I put my hands up, trying to reassure her, but with our weapons out, it probably didn't help much."

He grinned as he stopped walking. "Then all of a sudden, she stopped, threw her hands up, and yelled at us to stop. We all froze in place, wondering what was going on. Behind her, came yells in every direction, as the trap was sprung. She turned to see them rushing us, and she turned back, giving us an apology."

"So she didn't mean to trip the trap?" Fenris asked, intrigued.

"No, she didn't," Alistair replied. "Then the really strange thing happened. The group tried to attack her, as well as us. And their leader was so incensed at that, that he helped to fight off his own men."

"He was an obviously talented fighter," Duran took the tale back. "He had been hurt in the brawl, but we treated his wounds, intending to have him join us, rather than fight us. And yet, once we spoke, his only concern was for the woman."

"I didn't understand at first," Duran admitted. "What was so special about the woman that he would destroy his own trap, change his allegiances? I told myself it didn't matter, because it helped us gain another fighter, though we were then saddled with the woman."

"I must admit, this is unexpected," Hawke interrupted. "Were you not happy to have Cat along?" he asked.

"Not at first," Duran admitted. "My fellow warden seemed besotted with her," he said, teasing Alistair and causing his face to turn red. "My new assassin insisted on coddling her, she couldn't fight, and she seemed to be holding secrets. Just what I didn't need."

"What changed your mind?" Hawke asked, curiously. He didn't notice a few of the men tense at his question.

"A few things," Duran replied with a smile. "Her views of the world were different, as I am sure you can understand, but I learned to trust her. And she was always so… optimistic, I suppose is the word for it." He paused.

"And then we went to the circle tower."

There was silence now, and Hawke and his crew waited, wanting Duran to continue, but not wanting to push. They walked on, most of them pulling jerky from their packs to eat rather than stopping for a midday meal.

"It was bad, I'm assuming," Hawke finally spoke, breaking the silence.

"Yes, it was bad," Duran replied. He gave a large sigh. "Not many know all that happened there, and I won't go into it all." He turned and gave Anders a concerned look.

"If this is because of me, Commander, rest assured I am fine," Anders said with a frown. "I was not a part of the circle. Nothing you can say now will change that."

Nathaniel made a noise, and rolled his eyes. "I for one would like to hear it," he commented. "There are many aspects of your tales from the Blight that I haven't been told yet. At least, not in detail."

"Very well," Duran answered, though he gave Anders an odd look. Then he turned back forward, and continued walking. "Though I must admit I will be very disappointed if I were to hear or read about this later."

"Harsh, but point taken," Varric quipped.

The group listened, as Duran told the story of the circle tower, who had gone, and who stayed behind. They all knew that he was skimming over details, if not from his words, then from the expressions on Alistair's face. However, they could understand why, as what he did tell them was horrific enough.

"A demon was able to do that?" Hawke asked, incredulous. "To trap you there, in your own minds?"

"Yes," Alistair answered. "The worst part is, you don't even know that it is happening, until the demon makes some sort of mistake. For us, it was pretty obvious that our lives were not the happy images it was trying to have us believe."

"So… what did it show you?" Varric asked, and his friends all chastised him immediately.

"Uh, sorry?" he said, not feeling it, but realizing he may have overstepped.

"It can be personal," Duran replied with a smile. "Though, what actually happened, is that I broke out of my dream rather rapidly, as did Alistair. We were then able to find the false dreams of the others, and help them break free as well.

"To answer your question Varric," Duran replied with a smirk, "most everyone's dreams were being back with their families or loved ones. I was able to understand it was false, because the demon was trying to show me what I wanted- my father, knowing that I was innocent of the crime he thought I committed. However, wanting it, did not mean that I would believe it was happening."

"Ah, so the demon's aren't very smart then," Hawke surmised. "It was just pulling thoughts and emotions from you, like a desire demon might."

"Indeed," Duran praised, smiling at Hawke. "Most people would want to revel in their wishes or desires coming true, but my father was dead, and I knew that wish would never be granted."

"Something similar happened for me," Alistair spoke up. "Though it was my father acknowledging me. I was getting married, and my parents and siblings were there."

"Who were you marrying? Some noble girl?" Varric asked.

"Leave it to Varric to get to the sordid details," Hawke said, but he turned to the warrior with a grin. "So, come on, who was it?"

Alistair ignored him, and started speaking again. "The others that I helped were also similar-" he tried to continue, but Hawke just interrupted.

"Tell us! Tell us!" he chanted.

"Look," Alistair tried to explain, but Hawke just continued, getting Nathaniel, Carver, and eventually Fenris chanting with him, though Alistair could tell that Fenris didn't care, he was merely doing as Hawke asked in order to be left alone.

"It was Cat!"

The group stopped, and Alistair looked over to Anders in dismay.

"Sorry," Anders told him. "But I know Hawke, and he wouldn't have stopped until he knew."

Alistair put his hand over his face, hiding his eyes from their grins. "Why Alistair, I knew there was something between you two!" Hawke replied in a giddy voice.

"It's not like that," Alistair moaned. "But I can explain,"

"Wait, Cat knows too, obviously?" Hawke exclaimed. "And she didn't say anything to me?" he turned to Fenris, silently asking if he knew about this, and Fenris shook his head.

"But apparently told Anders about it," Hawke continued, his eyes narrowing on the mage.

"Look, I shouldn't have said anything, that is becoming clear," Anders backpedaled. "But she didn't tell me to share secrets, and honestly, I didn't even know who it was she was speaking of, until you shared your side," he said to Alistair.

The hurt look on the warrior's face, had him sighing. "It's a bit of an explanation, so let's let the wardens finish their story, and then I will tell you mine, all right?" he said, exasperated, as Hawke and Nathaniel joined in, in giving him pouting looks.

"Sounds good to me!" Hawke cheered, and gave Alistair a slap on the back, though he didn't feel it through his armor. "How about you, Alistair, as the wounded party?"

"Wounded party…" Anders grumbled.

"That is fine," Alistair replied, somewhat morosely.

"Great! And by the way, you have excellent taste," Hawke exclaimed, and turned back to Duran. "So, you freed everyone from their dreams, and then what?" he asked.

"Actually, nothing happened," Duran replied, continuing the tale.

"Nothing?" Nathaniel asked. "Then how did you break free from the demon's hold?"

"After a bit of time, we decided to go searching once more," Alistair said. "We thought that we may have missed something, and Duran suggested he try first."

"And so I went, and found myself in another dream," he said, choosing his words carefully. "It was someone's home, and I could tell that they were celebrating a holiday. I heard a voice, and turned to see Cat, standing in the middle of the room. She was listing the things that she knew to be true, and then deduced that what she was seeing must be false."

"So she broke free as well?" Sebastian asked, the pride in his friend coming through his tone. "That sounds like her."

"Yes, and I spoke to her, and she turned to see me, and a look of fear crossed her face."

"Fear?" several of them asked, confused.

"Surely she wasn't afraid of you, Commander," Anders said.

"I learned later," Duran continued, ignoring the question, "as others emerged from another room, that this place was her family's home, and the people the demons were impersonating were her parents and her husband."

Even if he hadn't known which of the men he travelled with knew of Cat's past, he could have pointed them out now. Alistair, Nathaniel, Anders, and Fenris all had concern painted on their faces, even as their eyes mirrored the others' curiosity. Those four knew what he had seen- memories of another world.

It didn't stop Hawke, Varric, Carver and Sebastian from being curious either, as they were even more in the dark about Cat's past, and since Duran would always protect his friend, he did what he could in that regard.

"The fear I saw, was because of what she was trying to put behind her," he continued, speaking mostly to Hawke. "She told me the memory was from the day that her husband asked her to marry him, something she no doubt wished that she could go back and change."

He hoped she would forgive him for taking the liberty, but he thought they would take his advice to heart and never mention it to her. He didn't like fabricating her feelings, but it wasn't completely untrue. She was now trying to put the past away.

The men were quiet now, though most of them looked to Hawke, trying to see how he was feeling.

Duran continued on, telling quickly of how they defeated the demon, and found themselves on the floor, with Cat laying on top of Alistair. He turned red again, and they had a good laugh.

In order to prevent more teasing, Alistair took over, speaking of going up the stairs, and finding the young templar who had been tortured and imprisoned. How he was so delirious that he thought they were a dream, or another means of torture- giving him hope only to find it false.

Then he spoke of facing a room of abominations, finding that one mage had willfully let a demon in, and was using blood magic to break down the defenses of others in order to let demons take them over.

"Cat stayed with the templar, even when he commanded that she leave, and she told me later that he had broken down in hopeless tears, wishing that she would just kill him, so he wouldn't have to relive it any more," Alistair said, his voice going quiet.

"We could all tell that it hurt her to see him like that," Duran said. "But she stayed with him anyway, because she couldn't help us in the fight. When we returned, she and Zevran helped him down the stairs, and reunited him with his templars. He saw her as a beacon- someone that represented the good in the world."

"She told me that she sent him a letter once, because she was worried that he would use this as an excuse to persecute mages, not that he didn't have cause," Alistair added.

"And because she was unable to help by fighting, she saw this as the first time she was able to help someone, and she couldn't let herself fail," Duran said sadly. "And somehow, in her mind- if he falls, it would be her fault, for not doing enough."

"That's why she can't give up on him," Hawke mumbled to himself. "But she sent him away," he said to the others. "If that was how she truly felt… how could she send him away, knowing what she means to him, and what would happen to him?"

The wardens exchanged surprised glances, but they didn't have an answer.

"It's obvious," Fenris spoke up for one of the first times since he joined them. "Because of you, Hawke. When placed with the decision between him and you, she chose you."

Hawke looked pensive, and kept walking, though he didn't try to engage anyone else. The others merely looked to each other and shrugged, and followed after him. Alistair stayed back, waiting for Anders, and started walking beside him.

"You know…" Alistair said softly, trying to keep the conversation between them, but the eavesdropping dwarf was more than likely getting all of their words. "Duran wasn't worried if you could handle talk of the circle."

"No?" Anders asked, confused. "What was that look for then?"

"He felt… guilty."

Anders turned, a shocked look on his face. "Excuse me?!"

"After you joined the wardens, he realized that we had been there in the circle while you… were imprisoned there." Alistair looked away, feeling the same sense of guilt. "If we had just looked through the whole tower… but we didn't. We could have gotten you out of there much sooner… avoided so much misery."

Anders frowned as he thought about it. "That… may be true," he spoke slowly. "But I don't blame you. And I don't want you to blame yourselves, either. I knew the consequences of my actions, so I don't blame anyone else. Besides… who knows if I would have gone with you?"

But he did start thinking… wouldn't Cat have known I was there? Why didn't she tell them?

He shook his head at the ugly, bitter thoughts, trying to let them go. Nothing could be helped by dwelling on that now.

"I'd like that explanation about Cat now, if you don't mind," Alistair said sincerely, curious how Cat had spoken of him.

Anders sighed, but nodded. "When I first met Cat, she was unlike anyone I had ever met before," he explained. "I had always been treated as dirt at best, but for some reason, she treated me like a person. And I realized that she wasn't trying to get something from me, nor playing some type of game, as other women had before. She was genuinely trying to befriend me.

"At one point, I felt that she was the only woman I would love, as I could no longer settle for less than what she was. I even went so far as to grab her and kiss her, trying to get her to realize that she wanted me too."

"I see," Alistair replied, feeling empathy for the other man, as he had felt and done much of the same.

"However, once I did, not only did she not want me, but I realized that what I was feeling wasn't passion. Yes, I loved her, but as a sister, or a friend- not as a lover. And I admit, at the time, it was a depressing thought."

"How so?" Varric asked, unable to not listen in, though neither man acknowledged him

"She seemed to be everything I wanted- the perfect woman for me! And I couldn't muster the feelings that I believed I should have!" Anders exclaimed. "I decided that my chances for love had passed me by, because of all the time I spent running- from the circle, from the wardens, hell from life!"

"That's quite the decision," Alistair replied, feeling that perhaps they were more similar than he had realized.

"Yeah," Anders said sheepishly. "One night we were in the clinic alone, as she had been hurt, and we spoke at length. One of the things we spoke of was these feelings, and she told me that she believed there isn't only one chance at love, otherwise she would have to believe that she let hers go as well. That's when she told me about you- well, a man that she knew, but now I know it was you."

He pushed his hand through his hair, not wanting to get embarrassed by the details. And realized he had yet to pull it back and out of his face, but left it as it was.

"She told me that she could have loved you, but that circumstances of the blight were in the way, and you both had duties that made it impossible. But, she swore that it only meant that there was someone else out there… for each of you, and that meant that there was someone else out there for me as well."

He hung his head a little, surprised that he felt so badly about telling them of the conversation. It felt a little like a betrayal. "I am sorry," he said softly. "I didn't mean to share something so personal, nor to embarrass you."

"It is all right," Alistair replied. "Those feelings were so long ago, and have no merit now. Besides, Duran is always telling me I get embarrassed far too easily, and need to work on it."

"Hawke will help you get rid of that, as he likes to tease mercilessly," Anders replied with a small smile.

"Yes, I have heard," Alistair said dryly. "I don't believe all of Carver's stories, but they have some basis in facts."

"I can HEAR you, you know!" Carver turned around and gave them an angry glare, getting identical grins in return.

"Apologies," Alistair replied.

"Uh, the same," Anders said, though he didn't mean it, and Carver could tell.

"Whatever," he grumbled, turning back around.

"Interesting," Varric said to himself, making a few more mental notes. He hoped they stopped soon, as he had much to write down.

Carver was perplexed. Cat had always been something of a mystery to him, ever since he had met her years ago. She was kind, yet aloof, outspoken and flirtatious one moment, then closed off and reserved the next.

When he and his brother were leaving for the Deep Roads, she had come to his home to beg him not to go. And though his mother had been sure that she had feelings for him, it didn't make any sense. She had never taken him up on his advances… in fact had seemed put off by them- so he had stopped.

He knew that the Commander, the Constable, and the Deputy Commander were all close with Cat. She had stayed with them for almost a year, and was always with one of them, yet they hardly spoke of her.

And now, returning home brought on talk of how his brother was involved with her, to the point that his mother was insistent that they would marry. It was simply baffling to him. True, there had been years in between the times he had seen Cat and Garrett, but he would have sworn that they didn't hold affection for each other, but merely tolerated the other.

As Carver saw it, having Cat's name brought up meant that it was finally time to get to the bottom of all of this. He only knew what he heard from his mother, or from snippets that he overheard from the others. Now was the opportunity to hear the truth, from the source.

Little did he know, that Duran would be helping him.

For his part, Duran felt he had a good sense of the Champion of Kirkwall, but wanted no doubts. He couldn't help but feel uneasy that Cat had yet to share her past with the man she professed to love, but it was her decision, not his. He thought that perhaps more insight into the man would help him understand her reluctance.

"So, Varric, how much farther, would you estimate?" Duran asked. "I am not familiar with this area."

"If we continue at this pace, I would think about 3 more days," Varric replied.

"Really?" Carver asked. "Won't we be in Starkhaven by then?"

"If we were going more North, then yes," Sebastian replied. "But we are heading East, toward Markham." He glanced over to the dwarf. "Though, I have always been told that nothing lies in that area."

"Well, Choir Boy, that must be why they call it the Wastes," Varric answered with a smirk.

Nathaniel pulled out a map, and found the points they were speaking of, and gave a whistle. "Are we going to be able to find this place?" he asked skeptically. "That is a lot of ground to cover, in search of a secret hideout."

"Varric had someone follow the carta dwarves the last time they attacked," Hawke replied, in a proud voice. "We were given pretty specific directions."

"Not to mention he said that the place is rather impressive," Varric added. "In fact, he said it gave him quite a shock to see such a place in the middle of nowhere."

"I suppose we will know it when we see it then," Nathaniel replied, rolling his map carefully and stowing it away.

"So, Varric," Duran began, getting the other dwarf's attention. "I'm curious what had you naming your crossbow Bianca?"

"You haven't named yours?" Varric replied with a grin. "Now that is odd."

"Oh really?" Duran retorted, amused. "Why is that?"

"I thought everyone was doing it," Varric said, giving a shrug. "After all, the warriors were naming their blades and shields, and the archers must have felt slighted."

"Is that what happened," Duran said drolly. "I suppose I just hadn't heard. Well then, how did you decide on Bianca?" he asked again.

Varric gave another shrug. "Mirabelle was taken," he said.

Duran wasn't fooled by any means, but he knew that he wouldn't get the real answer, even if he kept asking. "I suppose I won't go with that then."

"Going to join the crowd then?" Varric asked. "And name your crossbow?"

Duran gave a secretive grin of his own. "I think… Rina will suit her nicely," he replied. Alistair gave a chortle, that he tried to disguise as a cough. "Good choice," he praised.

The others looked at them, curiosity and skepticism in equal measures. "Why that name?" Varric asked.

Duran gave him a lofty shrug. "Mirabelle was taken," he replied, and Varric rolled his eyes.

"I see…" he responded.

"Well I don't," Carver complained. "Why that name?"

"Perhaps I will tell that story another time," Duran answered. "But I think perhaps it is someone else's turn."

Carver snatched at the opportunity presented. "Varric!" he exclaimed. "You're supposed to be the storyteller here, and we've yet to hear one."

Varric's eyebrows winged up in surprise. "Well, yes, Junior," he replied. "But a good storyteller doesn't just tell stories, he collects them too."

"Besides, most of Varric's stories these days are about Hawke," Anders replied with an eye roll. "And we don't need to hear how badly he embellishes our exploits."

"More accurately, how he leaves us out of our exploits," Fenris added.

"True!" Anders agreed, causing Varric to give them a scowl, and Hawke to give them a grin.

"Hey, I merely give the people what they want," Varric said pompously. "It is not my fault that they only want to hear about Hawke." He chuckled at their grumbling.

"That it most likely better than what we wardens hear," Carver said, giving a smirk. "Mother's letters wouldn't reach me half the time, so I feel a little bit at a loss."

"Oh?" Varric asked, surprised that he was intrigued. The younger Hawke obviously had some sort of idea he was leading to.

"I'm sure Hawke's friends can help fill in the blanks for you Carver," Duran offered.

"Really?" Carver asked, giving his Commander a cunning smile, as it appeared they were working together for the moment.

"I'd be more than happy to help if I can, Junior," Varric added.

"Well, let's see," Carver said slowly, drawing it out for fun. "Last I was in Kirkwall, Cat was begging me to stay with her, and not go to the Deep Roads. He gave a sarcastic smile and shrug. "Looking back, I wonder how things would be different if I had simply stayed in Kirkwall, but that is besides the point."

"What is the point?" Hawke asked, not liking that Carver was implying that Cat had wanted his brother before him.

"The next thing I hear, is a letter from Mother talking about how excited she is that my elder brother would be married soon, though she was worried because of the rumors going around about how he had no choice since he had gotten his lover pregnant."

The three elder wardens' mouths dropped open, and their eyes shot to Hawke, who simply smiled at his younger sibling's attempts to have the upper hand.

"Is that what you heard?" Hawke drawled, not concerned in the slightest.

"Then, Cat shows up at Soldier's peak, showing no signs of being married, nor having a child. It does make one wonder…"

"Does it?" Hawke asked tightly, still not comfortable with the memories of that time apart.

"I must simply be missing parts of the story, obviously," Carver said, enjoying the cross look on his brother's face. He did love the man, he was his brother after all. But he was so damned perfect… and it was sooo easy to needle him.

"Because seeing the two of you together, it seems as if Mother is getting ahead of herself again," Carver continued.

"Isn't this old news?" Nathaniel grumbled unhappily.

"I see where you had trouble Junior," Varric said, giving Hawke a grin. "But that isn't one story, that is literally years of stories." He took a drink from his water bag, pushing the cork back into the spout. "But I think I can sum it up pretty well."

"Oh?" Carver asked, frowning. That hadn't been what he was expecting. "I'm listening."

"Well, let's see…" Varric looked around to his friends. "I think I'll need help. Broody, give me the situation with the Deep Roads in twenty words or less," he suggested.

There was a moment of silence as Fenris thought it over, and then spoke. "Cat had a bad feeling, and warned you, knowing Hawke would feel badly if you died."

Duran, who had been counting with his fingers, exclaimed, "And in only sixteen!"

Carver frowned at his Commander, who merely smiled back, thoroughly entertained.

"Blondie, your turn," Varric turned to Anders. "The rumor mill, in twenty words."

"Hmm…" Anders mused. "Cat faked illness at dressmaker's to spare your mother's reputation and dressmaker's feelings. Pregnancy assumed and spread from slighted dressmaker."

"Twenty-two," Fenris scowled.

"No it wasn't," Anders countered, repeating the phrase while holding up fingers as he counted. "Cat faked illness at dressmaker's-"

"Dress maker is two words," Fenris pointed out, and Anders glared at having been interrupted.

"Of course it isn't!" he replied hotly. "Not when speaking of the profession! It is just like a tailor!"

"Then you should have used tailor," Fenris added, seeming unwilling to bend. "You failed."

"All right, moving on," Varric said, clapping a few times to get their attention. "It was twenty, it was fine," he added.

"Not if you count the hmm at the beginning," Fenris pointed out.

Anders looked ready to argue, and Hawke stepped in. "We're getting away from the point here," he said settling the matter. He ignored the dirty looks Fenris and Anders gave each other.

"Your turn, Choir Boy," Varric said, moving on. "Situation with the assassins," he said. "And go!"

"Uh, Cat was targeted, but all of us were involved. Cat left in order to keep the rest of us safe, and give us time to stop the assassins for good," Sebastian replied.

"That was definitely more than twenty," Alistair pointed out.

"You all may have assumed that I could only use twenty words, but Varric gave no such stipulation to me," Sebastian replied smugly.

"Choir Boy has a point, but it was implied by the game," Varric said, shaking his head at the prince, who gave a shrug.

"So, why is Mother so sure that you are getting married?" Carver asked his brother, truly curious now. "I mean, it's been years now, and nothing has happened."

Hawke looked at his brother, amused at the question. "I'm a mage, Carver," he replied.

"No, really?!" Carver retorted. "I never knew that!"

"Your sarcasm is noted," Hawke said dryly as the other chuckled.

"I think what Carver is trying to ask, Hawke," Duran spoke up. "Is… what are your intentions with Catarina?"

Hawke was ready to quip something in return, when he noticed that the entire group was not only silent, but looking at him in expectation. He glared at his friends, annoyed that they were joining his brother's side, but they merely smiled at him in return.

"I…" Hawke stammered, not having a good answer, and falling back onto his feelings. "I love her."

He didn't see the smiles, as he had continued walking, and got to the front of the group. He heard the sound of someone coming quickly behind him, and looked over to see Duran had caught up, and was walking next to him.

"As pleased as I am to hear that, Garret Hawke," Duran spoke quietly, "that isn't what I asked. Think about it some. I'll ask again another time."

With that, he stopped walking, letting Hawke continue on alone with his thoughts.

Cat would have been appalled if she had known what the men were talking about, yet she was acting very similar in her questions of Nyssa. She would have been equally appalled at herself if that were ever pointed out to her.

Ignorance was bliss however, and Cat, Nyssa and Merrill spent the evening regaling each other with the adventures of the day. Cat shared of her thoughts regarding Hawke, and his response to her suggestion. She seemed very hopeful that their relationship would be able to continue to progress.

Nyssa finally admitted that she, Zevran and Fenris had spent several nights together. She wasn't ashamed, but was reluctant to share too much, especially since Fenris was so private, and Zevran had left- but Cat continued to cajole the words from her.

Merill shared memories of her clan in Ferelden, especially stories of both Tamlen and Mahariel. Cat was happy to learn about the people they were, though it made the loss of them hit her with more force. If things had been different, Mahariel would have been the Hero of Ferelden, and with the stories Merrill told of how he despised humans… she was a little relieved that Duncan went to Orzammar, thought she felt incredibly guilty at the thought.

Cat tensed suddenly, and the two elves looked at her in concern. "Cat?" they asked. "What's wrong?"

Cat placed her hand below her stomach, wondering if it was what she thought. "Uh… I think… I'm bleeding?" she said, standing up to inspect herself. Sure enough, there was a small bit of blood on the chair behind her.

"Oh, your monthlies?" Nyssa asked, relieved that it was nothing. "Do you want a bath then?" she asked with a sympathetic smile. "I can help you fill the tub."

"Yes, I can help too," Merrill added.

"Oh, yes… thank you," she replied, though she was baffled. "Uh, I don't mean to be offensive," she said as they walked into the kitchen towards the water barrels, and filled buckets to carry upstairs. "But are elves… uh, similar in that regard?"

"That's not offensive, silly," Nyssa replied with a laugh. "Most humans refuse to believe that elves are similar at all, let alone ask about it." She gave Cat a smile. "Thank you for caring enough to find out."

"No… problem?" Cat replied, confused, even as they laughed again.

"I actually don't know," Merrill answered, looking sheepish. "The Dalish are the opposite… and don't care about humans enough to find out."

"I suppose that makes sense," Cat mused. "After everything that has happened in the past."

"Yes, but we will never grow if we dwell on the past," Nyssa said, leading the way up the stairs. She missed Merrill's shocked look, but Cat saw it, and smiled.

It was probably the first time she heard an elf say something like that… Cat thought. Most were focused solely on the glory of the elves from long before.

"So," Cat said, hoping she wasn't asking something ridiculous. "You use… uh, cloths as well?"

"That is the easiest way," Nyssa said with a nod. "Though there is a potion you can drink to make it only last one day."

"Really?!" Cat exclaimed, ecstatic.

"Yes," Nyssa smirked. "Though it can cause problems in conceiving children, so most women do not take it until they are finished having children. And even then it is usually only the wealthy that can afford it."

"Cloths it is then," Cat replied, disappointed.

"Anders can make it for you, I am sure," Merrill spoke up. "Though he may not have all the needed ingredients."

Nyssa frowned. "Merrill, Cat hasn't passed her child bearing years," she lectured.

"Oh, of course, sorry!" Merrill replied, looking confused. "But I thought Hawke didn't want children."

Cat gave them a sad smile. "Yes Merrill," she added, "Hawke is afraid of having children, as he believes they would be mages. He doesn't want to have children that would be hunted and persecuted for what they are."

"Oh," Nyssa said, holding a hand to her stomach as if it pained her. "I'm so sorry Cat," she whispered.

"It's fine," she replied, giving her a smile. "I had given up on having children years before I even met Hawke."

Merrill went to get the heating rune, and handed it to Cat.

"Do you mind heating it for me first, Merrill?" she asked. "Then the rune can keep it warm, while I soak for awhile."

"Sure Cat," Merrill replied, placing her hands in the water, a light coming from them, and steam coming from the surface moments later.

"Thanks. Both of you," Cat said.

"I'll head to bed then," Nyssa said. "Unless you'll need help?" she asked, looking up to Cat.

"No, I'm fine," Cat answered. "I'll just soak while the water is hot, then head to bed."

"Just call out if you need anything," Merrill said, as they both turned to leave, and give Cat privacy. "I know I'm practically useless when on my monthlies."

"The same for me," Nyssa said with a laugh. "I get very cross at any little annoyance. Serine would always tell me not to even bother coming to work then."

Cat listened as the two of them left the bathroom, telling stories of their experiences. Grateful that they didn't seem to suspect anything amiss, she gave it another moment, assured that she was alone, and then undressed, and slid into the hot water.

She placed the heating rune at the bottom of the tub, making certain not to touch it after she activated it, as it could burn her. She put her head back, and closed her eyes.

It's been years since I had a period… she thought, confused. The doctors had assured her that she wasn't sick or anything, her ovary was simply inoperative, and the other had been so overworked, that it merely stopped as she got into her twenties.

She didn't ovulate, so she didn't have a period- period. When she and Steven had talked of having children, the doctors had been optimistic of using in vitro, as she still had eggs to use. But after two failed attempts, they didn't have the funds, nor the heart to continue.

She couldn't understand what was causing this, and felt as if her body were betraying her, by suddenly starting to work as it should. Now, when she didn't need nor want the organs to work properly, they suddenly started to? Was that what this was?!

Fate can certainly be cruel, she thought despairingly. I'll have to speak to Anders about the potion when the men return, and be done with this.