I do not own anything except my OCs. WARNING: Randomness, dank memes, cringe and grammar mistakes.
Chapter 123: $00pah NiN10Doh!
Nova started the video.
[Intro]
(First short)
Peach: Hey guys! Let's play a board game!
Mario & Luigi: Yeah!
Tumble: READY FOR A CRAAAZY ADVENTURE, BITCHES?
"It's Mario Party?" Ruby said.
Mario: Ehhh, what's going on here? (A dice falls on Luigi.)
"Was that Arin?" Jaune said.
Mario: Oh, I guess you're first then.
Luigi: FINE... (Luigi moves and stops in front of a castle.) Oh okay, do I get, uh, money or some- (The gate falls on him.)
(It was Yoshi's turn. He landed on a Bowser pad.)
"Whoa, whoa, wait, it goes too fast!" Yang said.
Bowser: Congratulations! Let's see what you won! (The wheel stops at death.)
"Death?" Ren said.
"What are the odds?" Nora said.
Bowser: (laughs) Aren't you lucky? (Blows up Yoshi.)
"Stop killing Yoshi all the time!" Ruby said.
Peach: My turn, my turn! (Rolls the dice. She moves to a star pad.)
Toad: Hi! Would you like to buy a star?
Peach: But I have no coins.
Toad: That's okay! You get one anyway! (Pulls out a star, along with his penis.)
"Whoa!" Yang said, covering Ruby's eyes.
"What?!" Jaune said.
"What the hell?!" Blake said and she started laughing along with the others.
Toad: Hooray!
PEACH GET STAR
Mario: Hey, what the fuck?!
Luigi: Eh, don't worry. I'm sure our luck will cha- (Tumble knocks him down.)
Tumble: Time for a minigame, asswipes!
(The minigame starts. Peach happily jumps on platforms. Mario and Luigi jump on a platform, but the ropes snap and they fall in the lava.)
Peach: I won!
MARIO PARTY 287 NOW AVAILABLE FROM MILTON BRADLEY, RATED E-10 AND UP, SOME ASSEMBLY REQUIRED, MAY INCLUDE CHOKING HAZARDS AND DEATH. NO DELAY, BUY TODAY.
(Next short.)
(It's an Excite Bike match.)
Biker:. YEAH! TOTALLY EXTREME! WOOO-AAHHHHH! (He jumps, flies off his bike and lands, tumbling forward and dies.)
"C'mon, people don't die like that." Yang said.
"Apparently they do." Weiss said.
(Next short)
Lololo: I'm here to save my GIRLFRIEND!
Lalala: No, he's not.
(Next short)
(Captain Olimar is walking down the forest, picking out Pikmin. A red one... A yellow one... A dead one.)
"I'm so confused right now..." Weiss said.
(Next short)
(Kirby is flying on his warp star towards the Halberd.)
"Yay, Kirby!" Ruby said.
"And the ship looks like a penis." Yang said.
Kirby: That... that... that looks gross.
(Kirby lands on the ship and pulls out his assault rifles.)
Some of them laughed a little.
"Oh shit, he's packing heat!" Nora said.
"Time to kick ass." Yang said.
Meta Knight: (chuckles) Your time has come, Star Warrior. I will finally exact my nonspecific revenge and take over DREAMLAND!
Captain Vul: Who are you talking to, kraaa?
Meta Knight: The devil himself.
"Meta Knight is so cool." Ruby said.
Captain Vul: Wow, seriously?
Meta Knight: No, butthatwouldbewhoyoubetalkingtoinaSECOND! (Cuts Captain Vul's head.)
"Oh shit!" Yang said.
Sailor Waddle Dee: AH, SIR! HE'S TOTALLY WRECKING EVERYONE WITHOUT EVEN TRYING!
Kirby: (while shooting and blowing up stuff) Excuse me. Pardon me. Coming through. Oops. Ah. Sorry. Out of the way. Out of the way. Ah. Oh.
They laughed a little.
"That thing is a monster." Jaune said.
Meta Knight: THIS IS BULLSHIT!
They all laughed.
Sailor Waddle Dee: WHAT DO WE DO?!
Meta Knight: We fight till our last breath and go down with the ship!
Sailor Waddle Dee: Okay... Better idea. (Jumps off the ship.) ABANDON SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP!
They laughed again.
"I don't blame him." Blake said.
Meta Knight: (facepalms and sighs)
(Next short)
(The Duck Hunt dog hides behind the tall grass. A duck flies by. It gets shot. The dog gets up, holding the duck and flipping us off. Meanwhile, at the battlefield.)
Commander: WE GOT ONE MAN DOWN! ONE MAN DOWN! THE ENEMY IS IN POSSESSION OF THE CORPSE!
"Wait what?!" Ruby said.
"A war zone?" Pyrrha said.
(The ducks start shooting at the dog. The dog runs away.)
Commander: GET THAT FUCKING DOG!
Soldier: GRENADE! (He throws a grenade at it and it kills him.)
Commander: FOR THE MOTHERLAAAAANDS!
They couldn't stop laughing.
"A freaking warzone! Okay, that was nice." Weiss said.
(Next short)
Fox: Why is it always such a chore to get u- he-he-hello! (He sees Krystal inside a... crystal. He instantly fell in love.)
"Oh my god..." Blake said.
(He punched the dinosaur thing who was playing the saxophone(I don't play Star Fox) and ran over there.)
Peppy: (through the communicator) Fox, what are you doing? We've got to find the dang Krozoa Spirits!
Fox: (crawls under the crystal to look under her skirt) Almost got it...
Some of them laughed.
Peppy: This is no time to be a horndog! Do a barrel roll! Press A to shoot!
Fox: Now I wish I had a camera.
Pokémon photographer: Ha! Leave it to me, Foxy Brown! New Pokémon Snap XXX!
"What?!" Yang said.
"Triple X?!" Pyrrha said.
"What the hell is this?!" Weiss said.
"I don't want to see that!" Ruby said, covering her eyes with her hood.
Photographer: With hot Pikachu busty action, all night all day long! Dunka dunka dunka dunka.
Some of them laughed.
Scizor: And he was looking for a Pokémon with a bigger bust. So he used the stone and I transformed. I tell you, it really makes them tender.
"What the fuck is this?!" Blake said.
Scyther: Yeah, well, sometimes he just gotta- (They notice that they're being taken pictures. They look at each other and then they pose for the photographer, who goes full horny. He takes pictures of a Bellossom, a Nidoqueen, and a Mareep.)
"I can't believe I just saw rule 34 Pokémon..." Jaune said.
(Next short)
(It was a R.O.B. on display... and it was already breaking.)
Geek: This... game... is... AWESOME!
"Some people get excited very easily." Ren said.
(Next short)
Purple Link: Okay, guys~. Did you finish setting up camp?
Blue Link: I set up the tent... over there... so I can sleep.
Red Link: Get the fire started! Fire, ha ha ha! Burn, BURN!
"That's actually cute." Ruby said while giggling.
Purple Link: Okay~. I got the clothes all washed and hung up to dry~... and I even embroidered our initials on to the chest. It's just fabulous~!
"I like how he wrote 'me' with hearts on it." Yang said.
Green Link: Gosh. I wonder what Ganon's up to.
Red Link: You never wonder that because you don't THINK!
TV show Link: Well excuuuuse me, princ-
Red Link: YOU'RE NOT WELCOME HERE!
Blue Link: Hey... what about... this guy...?
Dark Link: I'll get you, Gadgets. (His bird hat screes.)
"Now I want to play that game." Ruby said.
(Next short)
Diddy Kong: So Dixie, what do you say we skip the action-adventure platforming and get on that Diddy Kong?
"Are they kids?" Pyrrha said.
Dixie Kong: You do know we're, like, related, right?
Diddy Kong: That's even better!
(Next short)
"Sweet home Alabama!" Yang said.
Wario: Come on down to Crazy Wario's Wario Microgame Emporium! I'm-a so crazy, I'm giving these completely ridiculous and dumbfounding minigames away for (coughs a hundred) dollars, EACH!
"How many?" Ruby said.
"I think he said a hundred." Blake said.
Wario: Show up your mad skills on your videogame homies! 'Squish the little girl', 'Grope the boobies', 'Play with knives', 'SWEET RAVE PARTY'!
Some of them laughed.
Wario: Remember! If it's not made in Wario, it's not made good... Ah, I don't fucking know, but come-a down anyway! Wahahahaha!
(Next short)
Now back to our feature movie, Planet of the Kongs!
(A Japanese man is walking through a desert.)
Man: Ugh, waha... whatu the hellu is goingu on, desu-ka ne?
Some of them laughed.
"I can't! When someone talks like this I can't hold it!" Yang said while laughing.
(The man sees a couple of Kongs.)
Man: HORY SHITO! (Gets pinned down.) Purease don'tu hurtu meee, desu-ka!
Kong: Get your filthy hands off me, you damn, dirty human!
(The man is now in jail.)
Man: This is Madu Housu! MADU HOUSUUUUUU!
They all laughed.
(Next short)
(It was a Game and Watch game about fast food. The orders were too much. The orders werw done, but as Mr. Game and Watch was carrying the food, he slips and falls, dropping the food on the other guy. And then the game turns off.)
"Noooo! Poor pancakes..." Nora said.
Geek: Did... uh, I... did I win?
(Next short)
(Final Destination. King Dedede vs Master Hand. Master Hand comes down with a punch. He misses and breaks a bone. He starts screaming in pain while Dedede is rolling on the floor laughing.)
They laughed a little.
"Freaking dumbass." Yang said.
(Next short)
Pokémon photographer: Yeah, yeah! That's it, baby. Sell it. Sell it! Sell it like you got Diamonds and Pearls!
"There's more?!" Pyrrha said.
"Not any more!" Ruby said, covering her eyes again.
(He takes pictures of a Dragonair, a Miltank-
"Okay, this is getting too weird." Yang said.
"And before it wasn't?!" Weiss said.
(- a Celebi, a Mudkip, a Blaziken, a Jigglypuff, a Plusle and a Minun-)
"Aw, god..." Jaune said.
"Skip it, please!" Pyrrha said.
(- and a Lopunny. The geek, while enjoying it, tried to pause it, but he couldn't.)
Geek: What the... what... Where... Where the fuck is the pause button?!
Some of them laughed a little.
(Next short)
Marth: What? I bet you 20 pieces of gold that 90% of you douchebags don't know anything about Fire Emblem!
Lololo: Hey there! You want to help me save my girlfriend?!
"And now everyone knows it." Jaune said.
"Yeah, but If I see another Fire Emblem character in Smash, I'll smash their faces! Pun intended!" Yang said.
(Next short)
Meta Knight: Now my opponent, draw your sword and duel me!
Kirby: What?! No!
Meta Knight: ... Why not?
Kirby: I don't feel like it.
Some of them laughed.
"Besides, he already has guns." Weiss said.
Meta Knight: B-b-but we have to fight!
Kirby: Ok, fine, but I don't want to take the sword!
Meta Knight: OH YES, YOU DO! YOU'LL DRAW THAT BLADE AND YOU'LL LIKE IT!
Kirby: No!
Meta Knight: Alright. I'll wait.
(It was now night.)
"They're both quite persistent." Blake said.
Meta Knight: Ok, very well! But you shall taste the power of my- (he immediately gets blasted by tons of ammunition.)
They all laughed.
Meta Knight: Ai chihuahua, no bueno...
(Kirby won!)
Kirby: Yay!
Gay
(Next short)
(Fox gets a call from Falco.)
Falco: Ugh, it's such a jerk-off.
Fox: Uh huh.
Falco: You know what I'm saying? Fucking jack my tank even!
Fox: Yeah.
Falco: And I was all like 'Personally, I prefer ya mom'!
"What is he talking about?" Blake said.
"Personally, I prefer ya mam!" Yang said, giggling again.
(Then he gets a call from Amanda Toad.)
Amanda: (crying) Every time I speak to him, he never looks me in the eye like he did when we first fell in love! (Fox was speechless)
Some of them laughed.
Amanda: I feel like the only reason he keeps me around anymore is to keep making these fucking tadpoles that won't live up to be anywhere near us- hey, you wanna grab some dinner later?
Fox: No!
"She changed her mood from 100 to 'wanna fuck' in no time."
(Then he gets a call from Krystal.)
Krystal: You tried to look up my skirt?!
Fox: Give me a break. I was a desperate man in a desperately bad game, desperately needing some poon.
Krystal: Oh, I love it when you talk dirty.
Fox: Oh shut up!
The girls laughed.
(Next short)
Male Pokémon trainer: Alright, let's see here. We got time and space, every human emotion, eevery natural element and nature itself, life and death... What do we go for next?
"God?" Nora said.
Female Pokémon trainer: Only one place left to go. We go for God!
Male Pokémon trainer: Ah, wait. No, we got one too.
Female Pokémon trainer: Oh.
(Meanwhile, with the Pokémon staff thinking for Gen 5.)
One of them: Fffffuck.
Some of them laughed.
"There really is nothing after that, huh?" Jaune said.
(Next short)
(It starts at a hospital. An L Tetris block is pacing back and forth, waiting for the results, along with his S-block friend.)
"Tetris blocks?" Blake said.
"What could you do with Tetris blocks?" Weiss said.
(The T-block doctor calls the L-block to tell him the good news about his child.)
"Maternity ward?" Ruby said.
"The blue block is becoming a father?" Pyrrha said.
"That's so great!"
"Apparently blocks can have sex too." Yang said.
(He arrives at the room where his J-block wife is, holding their baby. He gets excited and takes a cigar for the occasion. But then she reveals her shape and it's a Z-block. The father is so shocked that he drops his cigar.)
"Ohhh myy goood." Blake said.
"But that doesn't look anything like them." Ruby said.
"Ruby... which one of the blocks look like the baby?" Yang said.
"The green on-... Ohhhh..."
(The mother quickly hides the baby. The L-block looks at his friend. The next thing is the S-block being thrown out the window on the top floor and breaking apart, dying.)
"Holy shit!" Yang said.
(Next short)
(It was the final battle against Tabuu.)
Tabuu: (like a megaphone) Attention, all citizens of the Smash Brothers universe. I'm taking over your world. This is no big deal, I swear. (Everyone is covering their ears.)
Pit: Sweet fucking Palutena, that voice is unbearable!
"You can say that again." Blake said.
Pokémon trainer: Not so fast, we're gonna beat you! Go Charizard!
Lucario: AHHH, OH MY GOD! I DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE IS WORSE!
Some of them laughed a little.
(Then Sonic spindashes into the fight, crashinh one of Tabuu's wings.)
Sonic: Hey guys, am I late? (Snake kicks him in the balls.)
Some of them laughed.
"What the fuck?" Yang said.
Snake: Fuck! God! Fucking hedgehog! Oh my god! METAL GEAR! (He takes a rocket launcher and shoots at Tabuu, which defeats him.)
Tabuu: Ahhhh, this sucks... I can't believe I showered for this... (dies)
Pit: We did it!
Snake: Metal Gear! Metal Gear!
Jigglypuff: Jiggly! (Jigglypuff starts singing and everyone falls asleep.)
They all laughed a little.
[Credits]
"Let's see... Arin's there, Kira Buckland... wait, MasakoX was in this too?" Ruby said.
"Wait, where was Kyle Herbert in this?" Jaune said.
"In the after-credits scene which is not in the video." Nova said.
"Well, that was... weirdly erotic..." Pyrrha said.
"So you're admiting that you're a furry?" Yang said.
"Very funny."
And done! Like, follow, leave a review AND NOT A REQUEST, send me a PM if you want and READ THE NOVA FORCE. See you soon!