They stepped out of the fireplace in the cold, dark sitting room of Spinner's End. Freddie shivered as she felt the cold air hit her bare sex. Snape still had her panties in his pocket. He smirked when he saw her clench her thighs together.

"Come," he said, nudging her towards the staircase. "I'll light the fire upstairs."

She wasn't dressed for the cold, she'd thought she'd be spending the whole evening in the Brewing Lab and it was always warm in there. She was wearing a black skirt that hung about two inches above her knee and a thin long-sleeved green shirt with an off shoulder style neckline. She didn't even have a cloak or jacket. There will chill bumps on her arms and legs and she tried not to shiver as she followed Snape upstairs. He led her straight to his room and immediately lit a fire in the hearth using his wand. She stood in front of it, rubbing her arms, trying to get warm. Snape put his wand on the bedside table, took off his shoes, then came back to stand behind her.

"Are you cold?" he murmured, putting his arms around her from behind. He kissed her neck lightly and rested his chin on her shoulder.

"Of course I'm cold. I wasn't dressed for cold, I was dressed for the lab."

"Mmm I thought you were dressed like this for my benefit. To distract me."

"That wasn't the plan," she chuckled. "It's always warm in the lab... I did wear the skirt, because I know you like skirts, but it's not like it's inappropriate. It's not all that short."

"I do like it when you wear skirts," he admitted with a soft chuckle.

They stood like that in front of the fireplace while the room warmed up. He kept his arms around her and nuzzled her neck but it was more comfortable than sexual. His body was pressed against hers but she didn't feel his cock poking at her like before. She knew it would be a little while before he could go again and that was fine by her. She was enjoying just standing with him by the fire.

After about 15 minutes the room had warmed up a little and he let her go. She turned to face him and he kissed her forehead.

"Take off your clothes," he commanded softly. "I want to hold you and I like to feel you when I hold you."

She flushed slightly and smiled as she hastened to obey. She sat on the edge of the bed so she could take her boots and socks off first, then pulled her shirt off over her head. He was undressing as well, standing beside the bed, but his eyes were watching her. His gaze lingered on her breasts when she undid her bra and slid it off, his fingers frozen in the middle of unbuttoning his shirt. She smirked up at him slightly. She liked that, no matter how many times he'd seen her naked now, he still drank in the sight of her each time like it was the first. She wondered if it would always be like that.

She shimmied out of her skirt, letting it drop to the floor, then crawled under the quilt. He finished undressing quickly and joined her under the covers, wrapping his arms and legs around her. She nuzzled her face into his chest and sighed contently. He pressed a kiss onto the top of her head.

They lay together like that for a while, Freddie didn't know how long. Snape's fingers skimmed up and down the small of her back, lulling her into a drowsy, almost-asleep state. When he rolled her gently over onto her back she was confused for a moment, until he put his hand on her thigh. He kissed her neck and suddenly she was wide awake and a certain part of her needed attention...only he wasn't moving his hand. She whimpered and spread her legs a little, hoping he would get the hint.

"Valerian – what potions is it most commonly used in and where is it found?" he asked, his lips brushing her neck.

"W-what?" she asked, feeling bleary and unfocused. All she could think about was his hand and where she wanted it. "Are you seriously quizzing me with your hand between my legs?"

"I am."

"Why?" she whined. She squirmed, trying to get him to move his hand, but he held tight, his fingers digging into her thigh.

"Valerian root, Miss Gray," he said in a soft, dangerous tone that she loved. "Tell me and you'll be rewarded. Get the answer wrong..." He didn't finish his sentence and she bit her lip anxiously.

"V-valerian root is most commonly used in sleeping potions, including the Draught of Living Death. It's also used in the Draught of Peace. The plant itself is used in the Forgetfulness Potion and...the Fire-breathing Potion."

"Where is it found?" he prompted, giving her thigh a squeeze.

"It's native to Europe and p-parts of Asia, but it can also be found in North America."

"Very good," he said approvingly, sliding his hand upwards but he stopped after a couple of inches. "Hellebore – what's the Latin name?"

"Helleborus," she whimpered.

"Where is the plant found?"

"In open meadows with full sun throughout Europe. Also China."

"Mm-hmm," he said, but still didn't move his hand. She realized what he was waiting for.

"The plant itself is stewed to a concentrated form for potions. Syrup of Hellebore is used in Draught of Peace, Volubilis Potion, and Potion No. 86."

"Correct," he said and his hand moved up again. "Staghorn."

"Staghorn," she repeated and had to think for a minute before answering. "Calocera viscosa. It's a fungus, found on the mainland countries of Europe. It grows on the wood of fallen trees and stumps in forests – including the Dark Forest that borders Hogwarts grounds. It's not commonly used in potions because of its bitter taste and oily texture, but it's found in some Cleaning Solutions – particularly wood polishes."

"Very good. You frequently miss that one when we go through the flash cards," he said, trailing his lips up her neck. He kissed her jawline and moved his hand up another inch. "Hypericum perforatum?"

"That's the Latin name for St John's Wort," she said immediately. "It's grows wild in temperate climates including Europe, Western Asia, and North Africa. It's used in the French potion used to cure rabies. It's also found in most potions used to treat depression, anxiety, and sleep problems...and also in your tea blend #55."

"Correct," he said, looking surprised and amused. "But that wasn't on the flashcards and I'm not sure it will help you in the competition."

"Do you have all 500 flashcards memorized?" she asked suspiciously. "And are we going to go through all of them before you finally touch me?"

"Perhaps," he said with a small smile. His hand moved again and it was now only an inch from where she wanted it, so close she could feel the heat from his hand on her labia. "The Famous French Method for the Bite of a Mad Dog – the 'french potion for rabies' as you called it – what other herbs are used?"

Freddie blew out a sigh and wracked her brain. She hadn't studied the method since fourth year. She knew she'd written an essay on it at the time but what she remembered most was Daniel with bubbles around his mouth, barking and chasing her around the grounds playfully, pretending to be a rabid dog. She smiled at the memory.

"Winifred," Snape said impatiently and slapped her thigh, just hard enough to hurt and snap her back to reality. "Focus. Or do you not know the answer...?" He moved his hand down a fraction of an inch.

"No, wait!" she yelped. "You bundle equal quantities of Rue, Vervain, Sage, Plantain, Polypody, Wormwood, Mint, Motherwort, Balm, St John's Wort and Centaury leaves together and hang them in the shade. Once they're dry-"

"You are forgetting one," he said, slapping her thigh again, a little harder this time and she bit her lip. She thought hard, repeating the ingredients under her breath.

"Betony!" she shouted just as he raised his hand to smack her again. He put his hand back down gently and nodded.

"What do you do once they are dry?"

"You pound them into a very fine powder. Then mix two to three drams of the powder with half a dram of powder of vipers-flesh in a glass of white-wine and take it in the morning before eating for fifty-two days altogether. If the dog bite is near the head or face, the dose has to be doubled."

"What else?" he asked. She thought for a minute, but eventually had to shake her head. She didn't know. She braced herself as he hit her again. It hurt more than a spanking on her ass but it made her wetter nonetheless.

"How is the wound cleaned?" he prompted. "What do the french use in their method that we do not?"

"Camphirated Spirit or Spirit of Myrrh," she answered. "The English use sea water." She remembered something else suddenly – threatening to cut Daniel's liver out it he bit her. She had to stifle a grin as she interrupted Snape's next question. "And it's recommended to take the liver of the infected dog if possible. Dry and powder it immediately and mix it with 3-6 ounces of wine, syrup, or anything you can use to get the patient to swallow it. It has to be done within 24 hours of the incident to be effective."

He looked down at her, his brown eyes warm, and she thought that he looked proud of her. His index finger brushed her outer labia gently and she gasped sharply.

"You are very wet," he commented in a low voice. She arched her hips but he quickly jerked his hand away. "If you move, I stop," he warned and she immediately went still. He smirked and replaced his hand. He continued to stroke the same spot, agonizingly slowly. "What are the properties of moonstone?"

"P-properties of moonstone?" she repeated, finding it even more difficult to concentrate now. She whimpered quietly. "Uh, it's, um...silver. A milky silver-white color that glows slightly. Some people refer to it as the 'wishing stone' and it's mined in...uhhh, mined in Sri Lanka and India, southern India. When powdered they are used in the Draught of Peace, Potion No.86, and-" she swallowed heavily. "-love potions."

"Mmm," he confirmed and dipped his finger through her dripping folds, causing her to cry out. He silenced her with a kiss then lifted his head to gaze at her. "Amortentia."

"Amortentia?" she repeated, staring into his eyes which were twin pools of black, no longer brown.

"Tell me about Amortentia," he murmured. He kissed her again and started trailing kisses down her chin, along her jawline, his finger still teasing her folds.

"It's the most powerful love potion in the world," she whispered. "And it-oh!" she cried out as his finger brushed her clit. "Dangerous!"

She heard him laugh softly as he kissed a spot below her ear.

"There's no need to shout Miss Gray," he whispered playfully and if she wasn't so wound up she might have smacked him. "...Tell me how to brew it."

"Huh?" she asked dazedly because now his finger was teasing her entrance and she hadn't heard him.

"How do you brew Amortentia?" he asked, circling her entrance with his finger. She was sure that if she could answer this he would finally enter her...but she was worried she'd die before then. His finger stopped moving and she felt him thread the fingers of his other hand through her hair and clench his fist, causing her to whimper.

"S-start with 24 ounces of standard potioning water in a g-g-gold cauldron over a low flame," she stammered and he loosened his grip on her hair slightly. "Bruise 6 peppermint flower heads with a mortar and pestle, then sprinkle them into the water when it's lukewarm. Take 12 Peppermint leaves and drop them into the cauldron one at a time. Mmm..." His finger had started teasing her again and she fought to keep her focus. "Mm-moonstone. 3 tablespoons of powdered moonstone. Add it one tablespoon at a time, stirring 3 times anti-clockwise in between each spoonful. While the liquid is still moving from the last stir, sprinkle a handful of red rose thorns into the water. Let it stew for one hour then remove it from the fire and cover the cauldron with a silk cloth in a dark place to steep for-" the tip of his finger dipped inside of her and she whimpered desperately. "You're killing me, Severus. Literally killing me."

"Keep going," he told her.

"You keep going," she retorted before she could stop herself. He raised his head from where he'd been periodically kissing her neck and he gave her a scathing look that made her heart stop. She flushed and he 'hmmed' disapprovingly. His finger wasn't moving but he didn't pull it away either and she was grateful for that.

"S-sorry," she stammered. "I'm sorry." She cleared her throat. "Over the course of seven days uncover the potion once a day to stir it seven times... anti-clockwise. On the 9th day place the cauldron back over a low flame. Place 3 frozen ashwinder eggs into the potion one at a time, careful not to splash the potion, gently stirring as you do. When steam begins to rise add a lock of your own hair or a drop of blood – or, if you're intending to use it on someone specific, a lock of their hair or their blood. When the potion becomes pearlescent in color remove it from the flames. Once it is cooled it can be strained into a vial for storage."

She said the last sentence in a rush, glad to be finished, more than ready to be rewarded. But he didn't move his finger. Instead he lowered his mouth back to her neck and kissed her. She whined in disappointment and he nipped her, hard enough to make her gasp and to probably leave a mark. He continued kissing and nipping at her throat for what felt like days, still not moving his fingers, until Freddie felt like she would cry from frustration.

"Please," she begged, tears prickling at the corners of her eyes. "Severus, please. I need it, I need it now, I need your fingers inside me or your cock or-or literally anything, please, I need to cum."

He didn't respond except to suck harder over the pulse point on her neck. It felt amazing but she couldn't orgasm from that.

"I hate you," she choked out, almost a sob. There was an audible sucking sound as he pulled his mouth away from the spot.

"You don't hate me," he whispered in her ear, his hot breath making her shiver. "You love me." She felt her face flush and a tear leaked from the corner of her eye. "How do you recognize Amortentia?"

"I do, I do hate you," she said but of course she was lying.

"Mm-mnh," he said as he brushed his lips against the curve of her ear. She took a shuddering breath.

"Amortentia is easily recognized by its mother-of-pearl sheen, the way the steam rises off of it in characteristic spirals, and it smells like," she took a shuddering breath and whispered. "It smells like you."

She was rewarded for her answer as he immediately thrust not one but two fingers deep inside her. She let out a cry of relief and delight. Both her hands were clenching the bed sheets but as his thumb moved across her clitoris she grasped wildly at his shoulder, raising her top half off the bed. With his two fingers thrusting into her and his thumb stimulating her clit Freddie saw stars as the strongest orgasm of her life ripped through her. Her body went rigid and her vision went black, then she saw stars.

As her orgasm subsided Freddie realized she was crying. Sobs wracked her frame and she clung to Snape who immediately wrapped his arms around her.

"Are you okay?" he asked, kissing her sweaty forehead.

"Thank you," she sobbed. She couldn't stop crying and she didn't know why except sheer relief. "Thank you, thank you."

"Shhh," he said gently, leaning back on the bed with her on his chest. He made soft comforting sounds and his strong arms held her tight until slowly Freddie stopped crying. He kissed her then – her hair, her forehead. He kissed away her tears. Then he kissed her lips.

"I did not intend to make you cry," he murmured. "I'm sorry."

"It wasn't – wasn't bad crying, I just..." She took a shuddering breath and he looked at her, his face both curious and concerned. "I've never felt, never had an orgasm that strong before. I felt like I was dying but amazingly."

His expression turned to one of amusement and affection and he kissed her again.

"The french call it la petite mort," he said. "The little death."

"More like big death," she chuckled weakly. "...I guess all that torturing, being on the brink for so long, made it all the more intense."

"Well then I am pleased," he said.

She lay on top of him a moment longer, then rolled off. He let her go and she flopped onto her back beside him.

"You okay?" he asked again.

"Hot," she said by way of explanation. She put her leg against his to maintain physical contact between them. His body felt like a furnace. It always did but this time she needed a moment to cool off.

She lay there, feeling the sweat drying on her skin, with her muscles still twitching slightly from the force of her orgasm. She thought about what had just happened and tried to be grateful for it – she was grateful for. The orgasm had been fantastic and totally worth the wait. Even the quizzing her she thought was pretty hot and she was even more impressed by her ability to answer. But something he had said was bothering her.

"What's wrong?" Snape asked, rolling onto his side to look at her.

"Hm? Nothing. Just resting."

"I can tell you are lying, Winifred," he said quietly and she felt a stab of guilt. She hated lying to him but she really didn't want to talk about it. "Your mind is closed to me."

"Just practicing my Occlumency," she said quietly.

"You are lying," he said in a low voice. "You never lie to me... What's wrong?"

"I don't want to talk about it," she said, turning her head to stare at the wall.

He was silent a moment. With her Occlumency casting a mental wall between them she couldn't begin to guess what he was thinking or feeling. She couldn't see his face but she knew it was probably blank.

"I cannot fix it if I do not know what it is," he said finally. His voice was soft but his tone wasn't dangerous or demanding. It was gentle. "Particularly if it is something I did. Tell me, Winifred... please?"

She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

"When you said...when you said 'You don't hate me, you love me'...it felt like you were making fun of me," she mumbled. She didn't turn over to face him, she couldn't. She couldn't bare to look at him.

"Wh-...That was not my intention," he said and touched her shoulder gently, urging her to roll over. She closed her eyes and shook her head. "Look at me, please." She sighed and turned over to face him, but she couldn't look at him. She felt stupid and weak and she was afraid of what she'd see if she looked at him. He cupped her face gently and made her meet his gaze. His eyes didn't look cruel, they looked...sad. "Winifred, I was not making fun of you. I would never, not for that." He brushed her cheek tenderly with his thumb. "I lo-"

He seemed to choke on the word but Freddie's heart leapt into her throat. Now he was the one who wouldn't meet her gaze. He was looking past her and his face looked strained and guilty. Freddie knew he was looking at the picture of Lily on his bedside table.

"You can't say it, can you?" she whispered. He tore his gaze away from the photo and looked down at her.

"I care about you," he said hoarsely. "I care about you deeply. But..."

"I know," she said and scooted closer to him so she could put an arm around him. "It's okay. You don't have to say anything."

He immediately wrapped her in an embrace and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. She could feel his heart beating rapidly in his chest.

"Maybe one day," he said, his voice barely audible.

She nodded and pressed her face to his chest, but she had her doubts. What if he never could, what if he didn't? What if he got scared and left her, disappeared? She knew he hated talking about it, knew he probably wanted to run even now. What if, when the time came, he let her go?

His mind opened to her suddenly with an overwhelming rush of strong emotion, letting her feel what he couldn't say...that he loved her.