Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters.

Original A/N: Thanks to MaeSilverpaws1, who is beta-ing this story.

Chapter One Hundred Forty-One

Fighting Minds

Harry gritted his teeth, since the night that he had pushed Voldemort out of his mind he hadn't known a moment of peace. Though he no longer was force to see fake images that Voldemort conjured for him, he was now in the constant presence of Voldemort. His scar seemed to always be on fire now; though there were times when it would burn just a bit more and he would be in Voldemort's mind without being able to do anything about it.

It was true that he no longer had to watch his friends and love ones being tortured, but at the same time he knew that what he saw now was real and not an implanted image, which in a way made it worse. Even when witnessing how Voldemort handled his followers, Harry felt sickened by what he saw. Voldemort show no mercy whatsoever to them, torturing one of his Death Eaters for giving him bad information. It wasn't just watching the torture either, it was listening to Voldemort's thoughts as he did this that really was unnerving, as Voldemort relished in the pain he was causing.

"Harry Potter," Voldemort said after the Death Eater had been dragged from the room. He was smiling, his red eyes dangerous and his face just as snakelike as it had been the summer before. Somewhere in the back of his mind Harry realized that Voldemort must be looking into a mirror so they could have, what appeared to him as, a face to face talk. "I hope you've enjoyed this show. Fantasies haven't seemed to have been working as well as I had hoped so now you'll get reality."

Harry woke up after that statement violently ill. He knew that Voldemort wasn't giving him an idle threat and his mind was buzzing. Any time he closed his eyes he was afraid that he would be in Voldemort's mind and as the week went on, more often than not he was. When he was a wake, he felt as if Voldemort was looking through his eyes, picking through his mind and pulling out everything he knew … everything he was.

He tried to muscle up his anger, tried to work on all of the Occlumency he knew, but nothing seemed to work. When he was force to watch Voldemort torture, and later kill, a pair of Muggles for no reason other than that they were there, he felt only helplessness. And Voldemort knew that, and reveled in his helplessness.

Harry's friends still came to visit him but he didn't pay attention to them, he didn't want to see anyone while it felt like Voldemort was constantly with him. Eventually, most of them stop coming, though Ron and Hermione ignored any protest, whether with words or just his silent treatment, luckily they only stayed for only a few minutes, just long enough to let him know they were there for him. Sirius too constantly visited him, and stayed by Harry's side during his free time. Harry didn't mind this as much, and the only time he felt almost normal was when he talked to Sirius. The conversations were usually centered on what he saw, so they weren't very nice but Sirius was still able to make him relax a little.

Of course after a while even these conversations no longer seemed to be helpful because day after day Harry saw the same thing … people dying at Voldemort's hands. There was a range of victims, and several different ways for them to be tortured but it eventually lead to their deaths and it always felt like he was the one doing it.

One particularly bad night, Voldemort talked directly to him again, saying, "I thought I'd change things up and show you the past."

He entered a dark room that seemed more like a dungeon. He saw that someone was chained in the middle of the room, his head was down at first, and he felt pleased that the man was cowering from him. Then James Potter looked up, a look of defiance in his eyes just as several of the other younger wizards he had face. They actually believed that they could stand up to Lord Voldemort, the fools. James Potter had, however, thought ahead, cursing his own mind so that he would not give up the information that would mean the death of his wife and child. James was still a foolish man, to waste himself to protect those others, but he couldn't help but admire the dedication he had to try not to be a liability. If his Death Eaters showed that kind of determination they might not be so worthless to him.

He walked closer to James Potter slowly, looking for the fear he always received from others and this time he wasn't disappointed. There wasn't a man in this world that wasn't afraid of him. Bending down and kneeling so that he was looking at Potter eye to eye. Then he was in the pathetic man's mind searching for the location he wanted. The child was everywhere in James mind, sickening pictures after sickening picture of a family happy together, but he couldn't see where they were. The memories he looked through started to deteriorate each time he landed on a promising image taking the important information away before he could get to it. Each time this would happen, Potter would groan and scream loudly as if the memory was painfully burning its way out of his mind. After hours of this, he stood up looking at the boy that was lying limply in his chains, the color had drain from his face and he no longer had any defiance in him. The foolish man had stood against him, Lord Voldemort, and now he was broken beyond repair.

"This was your fault, Harry," Voldemort said after the vision was done. "Your father never needed to suffer through this pain … if not for you. This wouldn't have happened either."

Harry was thrown into another memory of the past:

He appeared on Godric's Hollow and he could hear the fight had already started but he had decided to go to the back, after all his Death Eaters were in the front. He didn't see her, but he sense that she was there and shot the curse that brought her down. The red hair was the first thing he saw and by the position she was in, it was easy to see that when she had fallen she had taken great measure to protect the baby in her arms so it would not be hurt.

Foolish. This people were so foolish. Protecting the boy when they knew that he, Lord Voldemort, wanted him dead.

"You were quite hard to find," He gloated, his eyes on the boy, though he noticed Lily Potter shifted more to hide her son from him. "But in the end, it was useless. I must say that it was rather lucky for me it had rained today … you very nearly got away." He laughed then, a cold laugh that was shrill and inhuman. "There is no saving the boy ... He is destine to die by my hands," his lip curled into a cruel smile at that and his eyes also became longing. "But you need not die ..."

"What?" Lily said.

"Stand aside and I'll let you go," he said looking almost amused, watching the disbelief in Lily Potter's eyes. He saw it before she said anything, as her disbelief turned to disgust, that she wasn't going to stand aside. The girl was throwing away her life even though she knew she couldn't do anything. Voldemort was glad that he would never be able to understand what was going through the minds of these fools who loved minds, because he would never be stupid enough to risk his life for anyone else. He had no weakness like these people.

"Not Harry!" Lily's voice was shrill and it came out in barely a whisper at first but as he advanced on her it became louder and shriller. Tears rolled down her face as she screamed at him to leave her son alone ... to kill her, but leave him alone.

"Silly girl," Voldemort said as he looked down at the woman that had become rather annoying with her screams that he leave her son alone. She must have known that he was here for the boy and it was ridiculous that he would leave without killing him.

Harry was suddenly out of the vision and back in the hospital. He was feeling every emotion possible, grief, pain, guilt, helplessness … everything. He didn't share what he saw with anyone this time, the images of his father losing his mind and his mother being killed wouldn't leave him and he couldn't talk about it.

Voldemort's taunts that his parent suffered because of him rang in his ears. He knew what everyone would tell him now, that Voldemort was wrong, that it was Voldemort's fault, but Harry couldn't stop the guilt that filled him. He had been Voldemort's target and his dad had sacrificed his sanity too keep him safe. Harry was just now getting to know the James Potter that was still alive, but seeing his dad's old memories showed both his parents as being whole and alive and he realized how different his dad was now. His mum had given up her life, even knowing that she couldn't protect him (not physical at least), she still wouldn't let him die. He felt the weight of this settle in his heart.

It wasn't until the next day, that he realized that Voldemort wasn't anywhere lurking in his mind as he grieved. He had no idea if he pushed Voldemort out or if Voldemort had chosen to leave, and he didn't really care. He couldn't seem to care about anything like that, nor for what form of torture would be next, all he could think about was everything his parents went through when he was little more than a year old.

When he did feel Voldemort returned it was to pull him into a vision, and he followed. A hollow determination filled him and he wasn't going to let Voldemort control him anymore. It wasn't the anger that everyone thought he needed that give him the strength to fight, but this new found feeling.

Are you trying to fight me, Harry? he could almost hear Voldemort ask with amusement. He no longer seemed to be in the hospital wing, but he wasn't where Voldemort wanted him to be either.

I'm not doing this anymore, Harry thought and yet he knew Voldemort heard him as clearly as if he spoke the words.

Do you really think you have any choice?

Harry didn't bother to answer that he just waited for Voldemort, knowing that he was going to do something more, to try to prove to Harry that he couldn't stop the onslaught. He wasn't disappointed; he felt Voldemort put more pressure on him to break through his new found defense. Harry didn't panic, he didn't try to desperately make sure his defense were strong, they just were.

Harry felt Voldemort's angry rise, he felt a bit of his own boil over, and it came to him that he wanted Voldemort to feel exactly what he had felt during the last memory. He knew that Voldemort didn't care about anyone, but Harry's feelings were raw and Voldemort didn't have to understand the pain to feel it. So for the first time, Harry focused on his own feelings and then tried to push them onto Voldemort. For the first time, he could feel Voldemort pull back on his Legilimency and then try to shield himself.

So now you're trying to attack, Harry, Voldemort thought, there was no change in his voice, he was as confident as ever. This was merely a slight obstacle he had to get around. Do you really think you can?

Harry didn't think of a comeback, he just continued putting everything he had on passing on his grief to Voldemort. Anger was now backing up this feelings and he was more determined than ever to never have to go through this again. He was going to make Voldemort feel his pain. This wasn't about skill, this was his will against Voldemort's and he wasn't going to lose this time. He wasn't going to be helpless again.

You'll always be helpless against me, Voldemort gloated.

NO! Harry thought angrily, but felt himself weaken at his protest, he felt Voldemort becoming stronger.

Fight all you want Harry, but you can't stop me from hurting you, from killing the people around you; you're just a boy that is destined to die by my hands.

NO! Harry thought again, but it wasn't only his angry that was strengthened by this newest taunt, but his resolve as well. That pain of loss was so close to him now that the thought of anyone else getting hurt was too much for him to bear.

If it was too much for him to bear, it was impossible for Voldemort. Harry could tell that Voldemort was feeling everything that he was feeling now and Voldemort couldn't stand the pain. Harry was now in Voldemort's mind, not like he had been in the past; this wasn't a vision that Voldemort want him to see, or the memories he shared with Harry or the current moments of torture and pain. No, he was wandering through Voldemort's secrets. He saw images of the orphanage that Voldemort was raised in. Saw the children that Voldemort had tortured before he even went to Hogwarts in a dark cave. Harry saw Voldemort walking the corridors of Hogwarts, he was no longer a student but he was trying to get a job as a professor. He saw a bunch of Slytherins laughing, stumbling over themselves to get Voldemort's approval. He was talking with someone about a Gringotts's vault. He was working at a shop with a lot of dark objects in it …

Harry was suddenly back in the hospital wing breathing heavily, his head was aching worse than it ever has before and he couldn't seem to be able to move a muscle. But he knew one thing for sure, Voldemort was no longer in his mind, and he wasn't coming back for more.