196. Sorry for the delay! I try to update weekly and I'm a little off schedule!

Saying goodbye to the family happened in phases. Those flying out early in the morning said their farewells Sunday night. The next group met for brunch at the country club and splintered into rental cars from there, giving last hugs and exchanging information in the parking lot. Among the last to leave were Michael and Natalia. They were going back to California via Philadelphia and spending a few nights in the city before returning to Los Angeles. In less of a hurry, they accepted the invitation for a late morning boat ride followed by a low-key lunch back at the Tucker house.

"Noah, buddy," Michael said as he popped a bacon-wrapped scallop in his mouth, "You are awesome on that tube!"

"You see me lean into da turns?" Noah asked proudly. "Daddy taught me dat! Gotta do da same thing on da jet ski! Hey! You didn't ride da jet skis with us, Michael!"

"Next time."

"Kay." Noah skipped over to the large coffee table and plucked a scallop of his own. "Dese are good."

"What do you like best about them?" Natalia asked. She was a former elementary school teacher and had an easy way of talking to Noah and the twins. She wasn't quite as successful with Sofia, but not even Olivia had an easy time getting her to warm up.

Noah twisted his lips and examined the food on the skewer. "I think...da crispy bacon! Bacon's super good when it's crispy and it makes everrthing taste super good. Daddy's always cookin' bacon 'til it's crispy. Mommy loves it, too even though it makes everrthing smell like bacon! So that's why it's good we have da outside cook stuff here!"

"I think you're exactly right," Natalia said, smiling sweetly.

Noah grinned, ate the scallop, and gravitated over to Maggie and Wyatt. They were lying on their bellies, coloring on the large white paper Ed and Olivia always had in stock. Earlier Natalia commented on their impressive collection of crayons, markers, and pastels, and Noah remembered he promised they would draw her a picture she could take back to California. He found a smaller tablet and got to work though he was interrupted when Wyatt laid himself on the larger paper and said, "Tace me, No!"

Olivia watched Noah deftly attend to his siblings and his drawing before turning her attention back to the adults. "So what do you think you'll do in Philadelphia?" She asked Michael and Natalia.

"We've actually never been there before," Natalia replied, "The kids went on a school trip when they were in middle school, but we were denied chaperone privileges. So...we'll do the touristy things first."

"There's a great little bar there," Ed said, "Near where Sarah used to live." He pulled out his phone and texted her to ask the name, "Been there forever, friendly people, have a lot of live music, jazz mostly. Great place. I'll let ya know the name when Sare texts me back." He wiggled the phone in the air, rested it on his leg, and landed his hand back on Olivia's thigh. "I ever take you there?" He asked her softly.

"No."

"We'll go." Ed smirked at Michael and Natalia, "We were banned from Philly for a while after Sare and Jeff broke up but I think we might be able to return now."

"Justin seems like a good guy," Michael said. Natalia echoed his sentiment with a nod. "Tal, you had his ear for a while last night."

"I did, wow, he's brilliant. And cares so deeply about his research, the project, the book...really refreshing, actually. You don't meet people like that everyday, especially not in LA where we live."

"We love him," Olivia said, "He's so good for Sarah and, well, for us. The kids love him...when he and Sarah first started dating, Justin was an EMT and he let Noah borrow some of his things for his Halloween costume-he wanted to be Justin for Halloween-that was enough for us!"

"How'd he meet Sarah?" Michael asked. He knew Sarah's job would not have logically led her to Justin.

Ed's grip on Olivia's leg tightened and his jaw stiffened, but he managed to tell an abbreviated version of the story and sound close to normal, "Liv was still on the job," he said, "Was working a standoff. Sarah was outside of the building and Justin helped her out down there. Total coincidence."

"Meant to be," Natalia murmured.

"I think so," Olivia replied in a similar tone of voice. She cocked her head and peered across the porch at Natalia, trying to make meaningful eye contact, "Are you sure you two can't stay one more night? It would be so much fun to have you here a little longer." Olivia glanced back at the house, subtly emphasizing her point. Brooke and Sonny had driven back to New York the night before and there was a room available.

Natalia and Michael looked at one another and shrugged, silently admitting to one another that sacrificing a night in Philly would be worth gaining an additional evening on the beach with distant relatives who, in a matter of days, had become close friends. "I'm sure we can get a deal on the room," Michael said, "Or even not, yeah, it'll be good to stay here another night, and, maybe I can even try one of those jet skis?" He spoke the question loud enough for Noah to hear.

"YEAH!" Noah shouted.

"Let's do it," Michael said to Natalia, who appeared as though she'd already made up her mind.

"Yes," she said and gripped his hand, "Noah? Do you think I can drive the jet ski, too?"

"Oh yeah," Noah said breezily, "Den, after, if you jump da waves a lot, you go in da hot tub and your muscles feel all better!"

"This might be the most perfect place in the world," Natalia replied.

Noah grinned. "It is."

…..

Sarah collapsed onto the murky shore and tossed her oar aside. "Holy fucking shit this is way harder than I remember! Jus, we did this before! Why is it so brutal this time? G, I am so sorry we dragged you along on this little adventure! You must be miserable!"

G was huffing and puffing, but not nearly as physically exhausted as Sarah. She sat down on a smooth, low-lying rock and gazed out into the wetlands. "I'm actually not. This is a cool thing to do." She wasn't lying. The paddleboarding excursion, to G, was a perfect combination of exercise, nature immersion, and sightseeing. Her only wish was a guide who knew the names of the foliage and wildlife they saw along the way. "Thanks for inviting me," she added.

Justin grinned at G in the way he did when he thought Sarah was being a little over-the-top. Often, handling and tempering Sarah was a two-person job, and Justin welcomed the assistance. He didn't offer a verbal reply, but he tapped G's back with his oar and rolled his eyes at Sarah as she made a production of stretching her back and neck while still sitting on the slimy-looking sand.

"I don't want to go back to reality," G added.

"Me nei-" Sarah caught herself and changed course, "It really should be an endless summer. This has been the most perfect summer. And the reunion, gawwd, Brookey did such a great job, it was fun, organized, not too big or overwhelming…"

"I dunno," Justin said, "It seems like we hung out with Mike and Natalia more than anyone. And ourselves. But maybe that's a good thing, better than just some superficial stuff. Which was most of the rest of the time."

"You're right," Sarah mumbled, "I guess I had this idea in my head that it would be one big happy family party thing...well, I guess it was for Grandma. For us, not so much. Wish Sam would've been able to stay longer. He was nice. And Livvie and Daddy are in love with Mike and Nat. Bets on whether they stay another night? Sorry G, you might be bunked with the kids again."

"It's only one more night," G said with a chuckle, "And I really don't mind. They don't snore."

"Maggie tries to wake you up," Sarah said.

"Yes she does," G admitted. "Every night."

"Maggs," Sarah sighed and quickly pivoted subjects. "Welp, this time tomorrow I shall be in my bed with Justin and our huge lab and dreading work."

"Where is Pearl?" G asked.

"With Sonny's mom and dad believe it or not," she said, "Carmen was a no and I felt bad about sending her to the dog hotel again even though it is posh, so, she went to Staten Island. Well traveled pooch."

"I'll say."

"I'm glad you were willing and able to hang out with us a lot this summer," Sarah said sincerely, "It's been a real good time."

"It has been."

"So you know what this means?"

G could see Sarah's eyes widen behind her sunglasses. "What?"

"No matter where we live we must always be neighbors."

G laughed. Sarah had an endearing, if not illogical view of the way things worked in the world for other people. But G knew by now to just nod and agree. "We will be," she replied, "Forever and ever."

"Forever and ever…" G echoed.

…..

Rather than preparing a meal, the entire group grabbed barbecue for dinner at a local stand which happened to be situated adjacent to the town's best mini golf course. After gorging themselves on ribs, brisket, potato salad, and macaroni and cheese, the group headed over to the course and played eighteen holes. When they returned home, Noah begged for a hot tub session, and, after being granted permission, he and the twins splashed around in the bubbles. Maggie and Wyatt played their favorite game-they would stand on a seat and shiver in the cool breeze.

"Stan'uh'COLD!" They shouted before letting themselves fall back into the water, propelled by the jets. After surfacing they would yell, "WARM 'GAIN!" The water sloshed over the sides of the tub and onto the cement below.

Ed sat back in the loveseat and looked on, smiling. His arm was around Olivia and she fit perfectly there, at his side. She rested her left hand on his leg and her rings sparkled when they caught the fading sunlight or the lamp affixed to the ceiling fan. He took a sip of whiskey, nodded toward the kids, and remarked, "Thought that'd be a nice place for us to relax and unwind but it's become another thing to play on."

Michael and Natalia grinned and nodded. "Cool bathtub," Michael said.

"Right. Home is going to be so disappointing."

"When are you heading back?" Natalia asked.

"End of this week," Olivia replied.

"Looking forward to it?"

"Yes and no," she said, "I love it here but I love the city, too, especially in fall. It's nice to have this balance. And we have two kiddos heading to preschool soon, so there's a lot of excitement ahead."

Sarah let loose an exaggerated groan, "The twinsieeeees…"

"Big kids now," Caroline said, then shot up and started for the hot tub to stand guard, "Jesus, you three are making me nervous!"

Olivia chuckled. Caroline being more nervous than she was certainly was a switch. Olivia caught sight of G who was on the porch swing and saw a relieved look cross her face. She, too, had been concerned about the kids slipping the wrong way in the hot tub. Hmm, Olivia thought, maybe I'm finally loosening up.

"Want a refill?" Michael asked. He held up the bottle of whiskey he'd purchased for their hotel room but hadn't really made a dent in until now.

Ed nodded and held out his glass. Everyone else declined. Olivia wanted to ask about California, toss around ideas for a future trip out to Los Angeles and up the coast. She and Ed had been there for the taping of the Ellen Show a couple of years ago, but the memories seemed like they were housed in the very distant past. Olivia wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. Her life with Ed and the kids had certainly become more and more her life rather than a mere footnote or a blip as it had felt early in their relationship. Other than the talks with G and the run-ins with Jo, the summer had been devoid of anything police-related which was both odd and refreshing. Yes, this whole marriage and kids thing was really going to last. So when she looked across the table at Michael and Natalia, she agonized about their uncertain future, and, like Ed, experienced twinges of something along the lines of survivor's guilt.

They talked more about Sarah's work, about Justin's projects and his eventual doctoral degree. They recapped the reunion and joked about some of their less fun and odd distant relatives. And, when the sun finally set, Ed announced it was time for the kids to get out of the hot tub. His directive was met with mild protest, but Ed allowed the trio to rinse off in the outdoor shower. The perk eased the pain of the end of fun and approaching bedtime and provided more entertainment for Michael and Natalia. When they were finished, Ed emerged with the twins under his arms and Noah skipping alongside. He delivered the sodden three-year-olds to Olivia who wrapped them in freshly washed navy and white striped towels.

"I drippin, Mama!" Maggie said.

"Yes, sweet girl, I'll get it," Olivia said, "You can sit with me and everyone for a little bit, okay?"

"Kay!"

She held Wyatt and Maggie on her lap. The towels were thick and oversized, and she was sure her babies were warm. Just in case she kept an eye on their small, suntanned feet peeking out, watching for goosebumps, but none arose. Noah wedged himself on the swing with Sarah and G and sipped from a bottle of flavored water. In the yard, Ed heaved the cover on the hot tub, secured it, and wandered the yard picking up stray toys before rejoining everyone.

"What stories are you going to read tonight?" Natalia asked.

"I dunno," Noah said and generously offered, "You wanna pick em?"

"Oh, wow, that would be great!" Natalia looked incredibly eager to potentially read to the trio.

Maggie, though, had other plans. "No book!" She commanded from under her towel, "Pay CARDS!"

"Gamma give dah'ers," Wyatt said through a giggle.

Caroline shook her head, "No secrets with those two," she said with mock disgust, "Absolutely none. Maggie, Wyatt, you have to zip it if you want to win any money!"

"Gi'me fi'dah'ers, Gamma!" Maggie said.

"Yeah," Ed grumbled good-naturedly as he sat down next to Olivia, "These two are sure to be a hit in preschool. Cards...gambling…"

"Hell," Michael said, "They'll be bored with all those ABCs."

"And counting?" Sarah said, joining in, "Grandma probably already has them counting cards!"

"No Sare Bear," Noah said with a twinkle in his eye, "Dat's my job."

…..

As they had done zillions of times before, Olivia and Ed ended their evening on the porch, sitting together on the loveseat, appreciating the view and each other. Only, on this particular evening, their backyard was decorated and ready for the next day's wedding. Extra twinkle lights had been hung. Temporary posts had been installed and tomorrow they would be adorned with splays of wildflowers. The Adirondacks had been moved into the shed and white plastic chairs sat in perfect rows facing a temporary altar which had been miraculously constructed in a matter of days. Olivia and her crew had even managed to incorporate the fire pit into the master plan.

"It looks perfect," Ed half-whispered into her ear, "You did a fantastic job."

Never one to take full credit for anything, Olivia replied, "The girls helped."

Instead of protesting, Ed kissed the top of her head. "You ever think we'd be sitting here thinking about one of our kids getting married tomorrow?"

"That's a loaded question."

"It is," Ed replied softly, "Mmmm...it's so quiet."

"Weird," Olivia remarked, "Rarely is it so quiet here. I think that's why the nights and the mornings are so important to me, to us, you and me, at the beginning and end of each day. Even after all these years I never get bored of that stability."

"I should have said somethin' along those lines tonight in my toast."

"Your toast was perfect. Your toasts are always perfect."

Ed chuckled. "Think so?"

"Oh yes. All of them. Even the ones no one else ever saw or heard."

Ed held her more tightly. "Yeah," he said softly, "Those are my favorites."

"Mine too."

…..

The drive home was onerous and aggravating. The Tuckers encountered every impediment imaginable-construction, accidents, heavy traffic-and Ed joked through gritted teeth that maybe they should take it all as a sign summer wasn't over after all and turn back. Noah, who had keen ears and big plans for reuniting with Mia and Mateo and planning for the beginning of second grade, instantly objected. An hour removed from his Bethany Beach paradise and he was already back in New York mode. The trip typically lasted under five hours, with stops, but not on this day. When Olivia finally saw signs for the Lincoln Tunnel she breathed a sigh of relief.

Then subsequently groaned.

The GPS went crazy. Her traffic app flashed alert after alert.

"It wants us to keep going," she said, "Something going on in the tunnel."

"No tunnel?" Noah asked, disappointed. He turned to his brother and sister for help in pleading for the underwater route but Maggie and Wyatt were both asleep.

Ed twisted his lips and steered out of the lane leading to Weehawken. "Can I interest you in a bridge?"

"Which one?"

Olivia turned and smiled at Noah and wondered how many other seven-year-olds had a preferred bridge into the city. "Which one would you like?"

"Brooklyn, but," Noah strained to see his surroundings, "I don't think it's da right side."

"You're right, smart boy! How about George Washington?"

"Okay. Dat's kinda by Gramma."

"Kind of."

Noah sat back in his booster and gazed at the unfamiliar New Jersey scenery passing by. Under his breath he whispered the names of cities and towns he saw printed on signs, doing his best to sound out tricky pronunciations like Secaucus and, as they traveled farther north, Rahway River.

Up front, Olivia used Ed's Twitter account to gather information on the tunnel backup. She murmured details as she read headlines. "Eight car pileup...jaws of life...emergency vehicles having trouble getting to the scene.." she lowered her voice to a volume she hoped only Ed could hear, "There must be fatalities. This looks horrific."

Ed made a concerted effort to slow down and concentrate on building traffic ahead as they approached the bridge. He did remove one hand from the steering wheel to reassuringly squeeze Olivia's hand and silently remind her they were okay. She smiled, nodded, and looked back at the kids-the twins still snoozing away and Noah sitting up, trying to catch glimpses of other people's lives happening adjacent to the highway.

"It's good to be home," Olivia murmured.

Ed smiled and winked at her. "Sure is."

….

The morning after the Fin-Phoebe double date, Olivia opened her eyes, took one look at the clock, and sat up with a jolt before remembering that Ed was there. She paused and listened carefully to the talking and laughter coming from the kitchen. Next to her, on what was now Ed's side of her bed, the covers were put back into place but rumpled. There was no doubt someone had slept there. Olivia chuckled. She and Ed had definitely had their share of alcohol the night before and she felt it in her head and her body. She also felt the effects of what they'd done after returning home, yet she'd slept so well she hadn't woken once during the night and Ed getting out of bed had not disturbed her one bit.

When she made her way into the kitchen, the sight nearly made her burst into happy tears. Noah was hanging on Ed's back-apparently extending an earlier piggyback ride-and Ed was moving back and forth between a skillet full of hashbrowns, bacon, and eggs and a cutting board full of fresh fruit. Ed chopped a piece of melon and handed it back to Noah, popping it into his mouth without looking. Noah murmured his approval at the taste and reminded Ed to check the bacon.

"Is it gettin' too crispy?" Ed asked.

Before Noah answered, Olivia said, "I think it needs another couple of minutes."

Ed and Noah both jerked their heads in her direction and grinned.

"Sorry," she said, "Did I scare you?"

"A little," Ed tilted his body so he could kiss Olivia while keeping Noah away from the stove. "Good morning. I, uh, woke up early and realized we could use a nice breakfast."

Olivia grinned. "Great idea," she replied, glancing at the fruit, "And you went out?"

"Yeah, uh...there's no food here, Benson."

"There is, it's just geared toward toddlers, but, no, I haven't been to the fruit stand in a week. We were due. And now," she bit her lip, "We're all set. At least until next weekend." She noticed Ed's neck and Noah's grip leaving red streaks. "Noah, honey, why don't we give Ed a break?"

"I'm helpin!"

"Why don't you help Mommy set the table? It looks like the food is almost ready."

"It is," Ed replied, "Coffee's ready too. Unless you want tea?"

"Coffee's good," Olivia took Noah into her arms, "Alright sweetheart, down you go!" She handed him his plate and utensils. "Put those on the table honey." She grabbed some napkins from a cabinet and handed them over when Noah returned. It took him longer this time and Olivia used the opportunity to hug Ed from behind and press her face to his unshaven cheek. "What do you want to do today?" She asked.

"I don't know," Ed replied. "Something low key? Zoo?"

The zoo. Ed Tucker's first response when asked what he wanted to do on a beautiful Saturday when he could have done anything in the world was to suggest the zoo. He wanted to spend the day with her and her son. He wanted to cook them breakfast. Be there for them, be present, be in their lives and maybe it was the lingering effects of the booze but Olivia was certain had he asked her to marry him right then she would have said yes and not immediately objected to seeing if they could exchange vows that day. Instead she gave him a kiss, a smile, and said yes, the zoo sounded like a perfect way to spend the day.

"Wha'else?" Noah asked. He was back at their feet, looking up expectantly, waiting for more instructions perhaps a tad impatiently.

Olivia smiled, apologized, and handed him two more plates.

Noah retraced his steps back to the table. Little did he know it wouldn't be the first time he had to wait for his mother and this guy Tucker to flirt and whisper to each other before continuing with whatever was next.

…...

Ed woke up early on their first morning back in the city in several weeks. He crept from the room and closed the door, careful not to wake Olivia or anyone else in the apartment. He made himself a cup of coffee, stood by the window, and experienced a surge of affinity for the concrete jungle standing before him. The night before Noah gushed about riding the subway again, riding scooters in the park, and biking to the Statue. The twins had a giggle fit when they realized they were back in their bedroom, and they spent at least half an hour jumping on the beds and getting reacquainted with their stuffed animals and toys.

Yes, it was good to be home.

Ed decided he would go out and get breakfast. He had no idea what the day entailed, but he was hungry and a bagel from his favorite shop would surely hit the spot. He ducked back into the bedroom to change clothes, left a note on the counter in case Olivia or Noah woke up, and headed downstairs and to the deli a couple of blocks away. As expected, there was a line, and Ed grabbed a newspaper to read while he shuffled closer to the counter.

The headlines weren't very interesting-politics, conflicts around the world that never seemed to end, local debates about taxes, transportation, pollution, public health-and, on one of the interior pages, photos from the Lincoln Tunnel accident. Ed winced. Olivia was right. It was horrific. The cars were unrecognizable twists of charred metal. There was no way anyone could have survived the worst of it, and, as Ed continued through the article, he read the names of five people who had lost their lives. A teacher. An electrician. A mother and a daughter. And…

"Shit," Ed muttered under his breath at the last name on the list-a Stabler.

….

#Tuckson