In Metropolis, several thousand green-skinned alien troops exited a portal. They wore blue uniforms with white chest armor, had laser rifles in their hands, and featured antennas on their foreheads. Behind the infantry were several mecha-tanks. The alien army had already killed scores of civilians with their laser rifles as they walked the main street. Police fired back using their cars as cover. The tanks fired on the police cars blasting them to pieces. The aliens then created a barricade of their own to shield them from police fire.

Kon landed near the police but before he could make a move, a beam sliced through several civilians and hit him to the chest. Kon fell to the pavement groaning with blood on his jacket. "My shirt," he said annoyed seeing a black hole in his Superman t-shirt. Noticing an old grandma about to be vaporized, Kon took to the air and rescued her. The alien army fired on Kon missing with every shot. Suddenly, Kon was hit and the two fell into a crater. Kon looked over the severely mangled grandma.

"Well...shit," he realized.

A tank commander fired on Kon's position. The beam hit a pink shield and was deflected. "I don't know who you are but it's time to go," Elisa said in her Violet Lantern uniform.

Kon chuckled at her and so did the aliens. "Get her to a hospital," Elisa told him off.

Kon watched passively as Elisa shielded herself with her ring, tossed some aliens around, and fired on some of the tanks. Additionally, she created pink bubbles around a few alien heads so they ran out of air and passed out. Elisa struggled against the army as she was getting hit from all sides. Her shield began to break down from the onslaught.

Kon ignored the grandma and casually walked towards Elisa. "What's your plan?" he asked her.

"We have to stall them long enough for the civilians to escape," she said obviously.

"Yeah, I got a better idea," Kon said as he went Super Insane. The blood on his jacket was immediately vaporized and the ground beneath him began to shake.

The alien army fired on Kon non-stop destroying everything around him. Kon emerged from the smoke unharmed and then fired his own energy bursts. Hundreds of aliens were blasted apart with each strike. Kon fired off a string of energy discs that sliced through their ranks like they were butter. Kon pointed at the tanks and blasted them apart. The alien tanks fired back creating explosions all around Kon without effect. Other aliens set up laser Gattling guns behind their barricades. Kon fired a continuous beam of energy that blasted their guns apart before they could even fire.

Meanwhile, Brainiac 5, Dreamer, and Guardian entered the battle. For his part, Brainiac 5 would occasionally use a metal tentacle to wrap up an officer and extract information from his brain. Nia created force fields and astral projections of herself whenever she could. The aliens fired on her projections not realizing they were not real. Guardian kicked ass with his shield and threw grenades at the aliens. An occasional laser beam would bounce off his armor.

"Who's the kid?" Nia asked of Kon.

"Take a wild guess," Guardian said as Kon gleefully incinerated individual officers as others fired on him.

While Kon had his fun, Elisa continued to shield fleeing civilians as they were randomly fired upon. Unable to keep up her shield, she fired a pink burst of energy towards the army severely damaging the alien tanks. Baseball-sized probes went straight for Elisa. She fired on them destroying most of them but one opened up and attached itself to her face. Kon landed on the pavement throwing several aliens back from the impact. Several tanks fired on Kon all at once. Kon blocked the beams with his hand easily enough but then got hit with a liquid adhesive.

"The fuck?" he wondered.

An alien commander placed his laser pistol at Elisa's throat to blast her head as she struggled against the probe wrapped around her face. Kon powered up blasting the adhesive substance off him and punched the commander off of Elisa. Kon tore off his armor and punched the commander several times to the head. He then realized Elisa was almost out of air. He easily took it off her face.

More portals opened as the alien invaders gained reinforcements. Brainiac 5 scanned the army and determined they were now carrying synthetic Kryptonian rifles. "I have some bad news," he said to the others.

"Oh, what could it be?" Kon mocked.

"There are too many of them and their technology is too advanced. We should consider the city lost. I'll contact the DOD to initiate a nuclear response," Brainiac 5 said seriously.

"What? No way! The DOD isn't going to take this victory from me," Kon said self-absorbed.

"No one is nuking anyone. We're not giving up," Nia said determinedly.

"You got a screw loose," James chimed in.

Kon engaged the army hitting more of their tanks. An alien commander in a mech suit punched Kon through the monorail system. The alien commander slammed down on Kon and punched him repeatedly to the face. Kon suddenly grabbed his fist and powered up to full-power Super Insane. He quickly overpowered the alien commander and then tore through the entire army killing thousands of troops in seconds. Troops were tossed in the air as Kon went through them. The surviving aliens retreated into the portal.

"A nuke? What the fuck, Barney?" Kon scoffed.

"I was merely trying to motivate you," Brainiac 5 said dismissively. "Where is your father?"

"Where do you think?" Kon smirked.

On the alien homeworld, Mon wore his Insane uniform as he confronted their armies. "You don't seem to understand. Earth is not yours to conquer. This planet belongs to me," he told them as he went Super Insane 2.

Mon's golden aura could be faintly seen in the deep red atmosphere. Static electricity sparked all over his body. Finding the alien commander, he punched him so hard his torso was ripped out of the mech suit. Mon crushed his skull in his hand and then went on an epic rampage across the planet. Cities were blasted apart from energy bursts and satellites were destroyed in low orbit. The planet's power source went down immediately. Mon blasted apart their moon and then punched a large piece of it down on the planet. The mountain-sized piece hit the planet creating catastrophic ruin across the planet.

"It's good to be back," Mon smiled at his total victory.

He then instantly appeared next to Kon and Brainiac 5. "I've wrecked their homeworld," Mon reported.

"Is that all? I infected them with a biological virus that will make them prematurely age killing most of them off within seconds," Brainiac 5 replied.

"Damn you, Barney," Mon said peeved that he had been surpassed.

"I don't think we've been introduced. I take it your Kara and Mon's son," James asked as he took his helmet off

"Yes, I'm Kon-El," Kon replied identifying James. Kon scanned Nia and gave Brainiac 5 an odd look. "Wait...I thought she was a...," he said confused.

"The malfunction was fixed," Brainiac 5 informed him.

"Wait, did you just scan me?" Nia asked offended.

"I have powers from both my mother and father," Kon smiled.

"And the weaknesses of both," Brainiac 5 added.

"That doesn't mean you should use them," Nia said peeved.

"Kon-El is morally challenged in many aspects," Brainiac 5 explained.

"Fuck yourself, Barney. I won this battle," he said immaturely.

"You could have won it a lot quicker if you wanted to," Elisa scolded him. "Hi, I'm Elisa. I'm a violet lantern."

"That makes her a Lesbian," James said intrigued.

"Not always," Brainiac 5 said knowingly. "There was one that resisted," he said referring to Carol.

"And I'm not that one," Elisa smirked.

"Well, it's been fun. Kon and I are taking off. You guys can clean up the mess," Mon said as they both flew off.

Smallville

Mara glanced at the news while helping Alex with dinner. "My father and Kon will be late," she said vaguely.

"Well, that means more for us," Alex joked.

Mara turned on a hologram of Brainiac 5 on the kitchen table. "What is your inquiry?" he asked.

"A few of my classmates have been turned into human bombs," Mara said.

"I know," Brainiac 5 said unconcernedly.

"Any idea who is behind it?" Mara asked.

"No. Is this something that concerns you, Mara?" Brainiac 5 asked.

"It does," Mara confirmed.

"Continue to gather on-the-ground intelligence at the school. I will see what I can find my own way," Brainiac 5 said.

"As you wish," Mara said and then turned off the hologram.

"So...Barney outranks you?" Alex assumed.

"He's one in the Vindicator Trio and just below my parents. In his capacity as the Holy Father, he outranks both my parents," Mara said.

"How do you know when he's in his capacity as the Holy Father?" Alex asked curiously.

"When he wears the appropriate uniform. With his hologram technology, he can turn it on whenever he wishes," Mara replied. "And his teachings are only infallible when he wears his hat."

Alex tried not to laugh. "I'm sorry. It's just, from my point-of-view, he's an asshole without a soul," Alex said.

"Logically, one separates the messenger from the message," Mara said dismissively. "When Barney is in his official capacity as Holy Father, he behaves himself."

"So, when both of your parents are gone, you take orders from him?" Alex asked.

"Assuming the order is lawful and moral," Mara replied. "You are wondering where you sit in the hierarchy?"

"Well...I don't know," Alex wondered.

"I cannot speak for Kon but should my parents and Barney be unavailable, we take instruction from you. You are our aunt," Mara said.

"Thank you. That's very nice and...very weird of you to say," Alex said taken aback. "What if I was married to Kelly? Would she be your aunt, too? Where would she fit in?"

Mara simply gave Alex a stare. "She wouldn't be in the chain-of-command or called as such...by me."

Mon and Kon suddenly appeared in the living room with both of them having green blood all over their clothes. "That was fucking awesome!" Kon said excitedly.

"Fuck yeah it was. Another civilization bites the dust," Mon said giving his son a high-five.

"You two should take a shower," Alex said as she saw them.

Mara gave Mon's beard an odd look. "You like my beard? Time passes differently on their world. I spent the lost few weeks slaughtering bug people."

"If you're going to pass for Superman, you're going to have to shave it off," Alex said obviously.

"Damn," Mon frowned as he touched his beard.

Kon went upstairs to his room while Mon went to the master bedroom to clean up. On the TV, the news was all about the battle in Metropolis. "Looks pretty fierce. Nia and James could have been killed," Alex said of the destruction.

Mara eyed Elisa in her Violet Lantern uniform immediately recognizing her.

At school, Kon hung out with Elisa at lunch. "So, Kon, what do you think about all this?" Elisa asked him.

"I can't believe they expect us to eat boiled chicken. I mean, what the fuck?" Kon said dismayed at the cafeteria food. He was wearing an immature duck t-shirt.

"I meant the mall bombing," Elisa said.

"It's unsettling," Kon said unconcernedly. "We should stop worrying about it."

"Well, that's a great way to figure this out," Elisa rolled her eyes.

"I have my very own Sherlock Holmes to figure it out," Kon said referring to Brainiac 5.

"Right, the robot," Elisa said skeptically.

"I'm not so much into solving mysteries as I am about kicking ass," Kon said.

"The fighting part is so much easier than the thinking part, isn't it?" she chided him.

"It's all I'm qualified for," Kon smirked.

In English class, Kon was enthralled with the story of the day. On the order of some lords, a man was put to death with his severed head put in a tree as a warning to others. However, the head in the tree called a girl over and spit in her hand impregnating her. When she was discovered to be impregnated, she was banished to the middle world of humans where she gave birth to twins. And those twins repopulated the entire Earth.

"Wicked," Kon said wide-eyed.

"Did you spot anything?" Elisa whispered to Kon.

"The only thing queer in this room is you," Kon teased.

"Excuse me, you two," the teacher scolded. "I expect more from you two, lovebirds."

The entire class all jeered at them. "What the fuck is wrong with you all? She's a hot babe. You should all be congratulating me," Kon said to the rest of the class.

"He's not my boyfriend," Elisa blushed terribly.

"Oh, sorry, I guess I rushed to conclusions," the teacher said awkwardly. "Now, shut the fuck up so I can do my job!"

"Jerk," Kon said under his breath.

After class, Kon and Elisa went down the hall. "That was uncomfortable," Elisa said.

"You said it," Kon agreed. He then got a call from Brainiac 5. "Sup, Barney?"

"Your physics teacher, David Hiles, is a former weapons engineer for global tech, a military sanctioned research firm. Neutralize him," Brainiac 5 said.

"What if he's innocent?" Kon asked.

"He still works for a firm that is a competitor of Wayne Enterprises and Lex Corp.," Brainiac 5 said.

"Got it," Kon said and then hung up.

Kon and Elisa flew over to their teacher's house. Kon scanned the house with his X-ray vision. "He's got a creepy basement," he reported.

"Radiation signature detected," Elisa's ring reported in a feminine voice.

As they came up to the house, David Hiles got out of his car and faced them. "Hold it right there," Kon said to him.

"I didn't expect to get caught so early, and I certainly didn't expect it would be kids," David said disappointedly.

"To be fair, you got busted by a super-computer," Kon told him.

"Fair enough. Come on inside," he invited.

"This could be a trap," Elisa hissed.

"Well...no shit," Kon agreed.

"Follow me, I'll show you the fourth missing student. I assure you, I have no intention of resisting," David said calmly.

"Well, okay then," Kon said as he followed him down into his creepy basement.

"It's just through here," he said.

"So...why did you do it?" Kon asked curiously.

"My son was pestered and bullied to the point of suicide. My son's suicide led to my divorce and my divorce led to losing my job," David said somberly.

"You're doing this to avenge your son?" Kon speculated.

"No, that would be too cliche. I'm doing this to avenge the destruction of my life. These kids are out there going to the mall, attending parties, drinking too much alcohol, and playing sports instead of studying and doing their homework," David said bitterly.

"Damn," Kon said realizing he fell into all of his categories.

"I turned all of these kids into a human bomb as part of my crusade to end the pain caused by these popular kids, and I can't think of a better way to end my crusade than the death of two superhero brats," he said revealing a bomb underneath his shirt.

"I'm guessing this was a trap after all," Elisa realized.

"Yeah, I didn't see any other people in the house," Kon confirmed.

"You only a few seconds left," David said to them as the counter went down.

Elisa fired a pink shield around his torso. The bomb exploded harmlessly inside the shield but blasted David's head and limbs off. Kon was splashed with blood from the explosion. "Sick," he gagged.

"So, is it over?" Elisa wondered turning away from the grisly scene.

"Barney will come by to make a sweep of the place," Kon told her.

Alex eyed Kon as he entered the house with blood-soaked clothes. Mara even eyed him. "You better not stain anything," Alex told him.

"It's already dry," he said as he went upstairs to take a shower.

Alex began to shudder, cry a little, and then consoled herself. Mara gave her a concerned look. "What's the matter?"

"I was once a high school gym instructor and one of my students got covered in pig blood. She massacred dozens of students in front of me and there was nothing I could do to stop her. Kon just reminded me of her," Alex said as she composed herself.

"You should talk to a shrink. You have obvious signs of PTSD," Mara said slightly concerned.

"The only shrink I know is Kelly and we're having a cool-down period," Alex said.

"My father can discuss your issues on your behalf. He sees Kelly every so often," Mara revealed.

"Wait...what?" Alex thought she misheard.

Flashback Spring 2020-Metropolis

Mon nonchalantly entered Kelly's office and sat down in front of her desk on a high floor in the Catco skyscraper. This was the first time Kelly and Mon had ever met in this timeline. "My name is Dr. Kelly Olsen. My job is to analyze your needs both psychologically and physically," she said.

"Sounds pretty straightforward," Mon smirked.

"I hope you don't mind. The windows can be a bit distracting," Kelly said referring to the skyscrapers outside.

"I hadn't noticed," Mon flirted.

Kelly lowered the blinds and gave Mon an odd look. "Just a few questions to finish your evaluation. Do you exercise?"

"When I have to," Mon said vaguely.

"Do you consider your employment psychologically stressful?" Kelly asked.

"Sometimes," Mon admitted.

"How much alcohol do you consume?" Kelly asked.

"Too much," Mon replied.

"As I child, would you say you were close to your parents?" Kelly asked.

"Not really. They're both dead now," Mon said uncomfortably.

"How long ago?" Kelly asked concerned.

"Short enough that I still remember it," Mon replied.

"How, if I may ask?" Kelly asked delicately.

"My mother murdered my father and then my mother was killed by my girlfriend," Mon said vaguely.

Kelly gave him a WTF look but wrote it down. "Humor me, how did someone like you end up here? Forgive me, but I think you might be hiding from something," Mon speculated.

"You're paying a lot of money for my services, Mr. Matthews. Are you the one asking the questions or me?" Kelly asked assertively.

"Of course, carry on," Mon allowed.

"I see that you have left your occupation blank. What is your occupation?" Kelly asked.

"Well, that's not the sort of thing that looks good on a form," Mon said awkwardly.

"Why is that?" Kelly pressed.

"I kill people," Mon said super seriously. "Small world, eh?"

"You're Mon-El," Kelly realized horrified.

"Barney disabled your panic button, your surveillance camera, and your phone. I just wanted to have a little chat," Mon said.

"You're violating a lot of boundaries, Mr. El," Kelly said freaked out.

"What can I say? I'm Insane," Mon smirked.

"What can I do for you?" Kelly asked nervously.

"In Insane culture, a man may have many wives. I wish to continue that cultural tradition. I've mated with Kara, but I want to add a few more. I want you and Alex to join my harem," Mon said boldly.

"We're gay," Kelly said obviously.

"Don't I know it. We can be like every other sex-less marriage. I can provide all three of you protection under one roof," Mon offered.

"I'm not allowed to have a relationship with one of my clients," Kelly excused herself.

"Say yes and I'll no longer be your client," Mon said obviously.

"I don't believe in polygamy," Kelly told him.

"And I don't believe in homosexuality, so we're square," Mon said.

"Kara will never accept this," Kelly pointed out.

"If it meant keeping her sister close to her, she would definitely accept," Mon said knowingly.

"Tell you what. If Alex agrees to it, I'll consider it," Kelly dodged.

"That's all I needed to hear," Mon smiled.

End Flashback

Smallville

"...and so my father's been trying to create this harem with you two ever since. He wants to get you two back together behind the scenes as part of his master plan," Mara explained.

"What the fuck?" Alex whispered.

Kon came down the stairs with a towel around his waist looking impressively ripped for a teenage boy. "All clean and fresh now."

"You need to put clothes on," Mara scolded him.

"But you're my sister and she's gay so I don't see why I should have to," Kon said argumentatively.

"Just do it," Mara glared at him

"Fine, whatever," Kon said as he went upstairs.

"Let me guess, he wants to bone me, too?" Alex assumed.

"In Insane tradition, if a son defeats his father in combat, he possesses his father's wives and their unmarried sisters. So...yes," Mara replied.

"I will pray for Mon's good health," Alex said dryly. "Wait, aren't you senior to him?"

"I was conceived before he was but the order of our birth was at the exact same time from the pod chamber," Mara explained. "In Kryptonian culture, I am, indeed, senior but in Insane culture, I have no rank at all."

Mon instantly appeared in the living room. "Let's have dinner. I'm starving," he said enthusiastically.

At the dinner table, Kon went into detail about his adventure. "So, I found out one of my teachers was turning kids into bombs as a revenge plot against popular kids responsible for his son's suicide. But then he bitched-out when I caught him. He turned himself into a bomb and tried to blow me up. But then Elisa came in and placed a shield around the bomb. So when he blew up, blood and guts got all over my leather jacket and it was so gross," Kon summarized.

"Why didn't you kill the son-of-a-bitch?" Mon asked.

"I wanted to give Elisa the kill," Kon said generously.

"But she didn't actually get the kill. He blew himself up," Mara corrected.

"Same thing," Kon said dismissively.

"Is it, though?" Mara asked skeptically.

Mara and Kon eyed their father. "Well...shit, Mara's right. You only get credit for the kill if you actually kill him," Mon admitted.

"So...who wants dessert?" Alex asked awkwardly.

The next day, Mon and Alex walked down the streets of Smallville. "So, there's this woman named Lana Lane," Mon began.

"I've heard of her," Alex said not sure where he was going with this.

"And I think I can get you hooked up with her," Mon offered.

"How do you hope to accomplish that?" Alex asked humoring him.

"She's totally in love with Clark Kent. If I were Clark, I would have made Lois, Lana, and Chole all my wives," Mon said. "So...I don't think it will be too hard to make a threesome happen."

"What would your severely depressed self-imposed exiled wife think about this?" Alex asked disapprovingly.

"She was already on board with a threesome between Lana, myself, and her," Mon revealed.

"But you're pretending to be Kara's cousin," Alex pointed out.

"Yea, yea, yea," Mon confirmed.

"What the fuck is wrong with you two? Can't you form a monogamous relationship with someone that isn't your relative? Is that so damn hard?" Alex asked him.

"Alex, you can't really talk," Mon said dismissively.

"No, fuck you, Mon. The only difference between me and a traditionalist is that I happen to be gay. I haven't slept with anyone since Maggie. All Kelly and I have ever done is a kiss," Alex said.

"Damn," Mon said surprised.

"And I'm not about to break up an 18-year marriage for some fling," Alex added.

"Hi, guys," Lana greeted as she passed by.

Mon and Alex both gave her a wave. "I keep forgetting how small this town is," Mon frowned.

"I'm not joining your harem, Mon. It's never going to happen," Alex told him off.

"Well, Kelly already agreed to the idea if it meant getting you back," Mon lied.

"What?" Alex questioned.

"Sup?" Mon asked as he got a phone call from Barney.

"Nia had a dream of an alien approaching Earth at a high rate of speed," Brainiac 5 told him.

"I got it handled," Mon said and then hung up. He then called up Kon. "Son, I'm busy dealing with some bullshit disaster. I need you to go into space and kick-ass on some alien invader," he ordered and then hung up.

"So...how is your job at the Smallville Gazette?" Mon asked casually.

"You sent your son on a dangerous mission because you can't breathe in space," Alex figured.

Kon flew into the upper atmosphere and into space. As he reached escape velocity, he went Super Insane. As a Kryptonian/Insane hybrid, he could tolerate the vacuum of space for a limited period of time. He eyed the Earth behind him and looked for the enemy. A green streak suddenly hit from the back. "You must be new," the Green Lantern said to him.

Kon stared at the one-eyed, purple people eater in front of him in a Green Lantern suit. "From the looks of it, you're a Yellow Lantern. I'm going to have to kick your ass," Allen-the-alien said to Kon.

"You will try," Kon smirked.

Kon punched the Green Lantern towards Earth's atmosphere. "If you were trying to punch me into something, the moon is that way," Allen said condescendingly. With his ring, he took control of a satellite and threw it at Kon. The satellite exploded as it hit Kon. The Green Lantern punched a distracted Kon back into the atmosphere.

Taking a deep breath, Kon powered up and went back into space. The two clashed in space with the Green Lantern putting Kon into a bear-hug. "What are you doing here on this planet, Yellow Lantern?" Allen demanded.

Kon headbutted him in his eyes and then kicked him hard into the moon. The Green Lantern made a new crater on impact. "Not bad, but I don't fear you," Allen said to Kon. The two clashed repeatedly on the moon until Kon started to get tired. Allen pressed the advantage taking Kon to the ground and punching him repeatedly until he lost his Super Insane.

"Wait, you're not a Yellow Lantern," Allen realized.

"No shit," Kon replied. "Who the fuck are you?"

"Alright," Allen backed off and gave Kon some space. "I'm a Green Lantern. We're a peace-keeping force for the universe. I drop by planets like yours to make sure everything is alright."

"Yeah, sure," Kon allowed. "But I thought John Stewart had this sector."

"That newbie? No, your planet, Urath, is in my sector," he said.

"Dude, this is Earth," Kon corrected.

"Is that spelled with a U or an E?" he asked.

"An E," Kon confirmed.

"Oh, shit. I am in so much trouble with the Guardians. Thanks for telling me. I'm Allen," Allen introduced himself.

"Superboy," Kon said as he shook his hand.

"Okay, well, as long as I don't get fired, I'll see you around. Sorry about kicking your ass," Allen said and then took off.