Midvale 2009
Brainiac 5 and Nura remained in a jail cell for disturbing the peace in the city square. Barda was in a corner away from them still sulking from her humiliating defeat. "It was so weird seeing Kara as a teenage girl. I mean, she's the Supreme Leader of the Galactic Federation," Nura said underwhelmed.
"Everyone starts somewhere," Brainiac 5 said. "There was a time when I was only a tenth level intellect."
"What the fuck are you two talking about?" Barda asked.
"The Kryptonian female you're trying to kidnap is our future galactic leader. You're lucky you fought us and not her," Nura told her.
"That's impossible. The male Kryptonian is the far greater threat," Barda assumed.
Brainiac 5 and Nura gave each other a look. "Kara Zor-El is estimated to be at least ten million times as powerful as Superman," Brainiac 5 said.
"That sounds like bullshit," Barda doubted.
Nura merely shrugged hoping Barda would find out the truth personally. "I mean, if I took that number seriously, there's no way an individual with that much power wouldn't just destroy every system in the galaxy or annihilate half of all life in the known universe. I have seen what power does to people," Barda said.
"We met Kara seven years ago and she's been super chill, just super chill," Nura assured her.
"Perhaps we should tell her the tale," Brainiac 5 considered.
"We do have time before we're released on bail and our charges are dropped," Nura predicted. "And btw, the reason I'm not pissed at you for making us miss prom is that I know we'll be out before then."
"What the fuck is prom?" Barda wondered.
"Do you want to hear the tale or not?" Brainiac 5 asked bored.
"She's going to hear it. I've already seen it," Nura said wide-eyed.
"Fine, whatever," Barda allowed.
"It will require a flashback of extraordinary magnitude," Brainiac 5 warned her.
"I can take it," Barda said confidently.
Rome 3017
At the appropriate time, Brainiac 5 put on the uniform of the pope of the new world. He wore simple black shoes, red vestments, and a white cassock, fascia, and simar. On his head was a white skullcap. In his hand was a metallic shepherd staff. He walked about the halls of a building in ruins and met with a collection of curious followers he had deemed worthy of being in his presence. He gave them all a look as if analyzing their hopes, expectations, and desires of him. He gave them false smiles as if to assure them and then walked towards a balcony overlooking a large square. In front of him were three hundred thousand people organized into blocks all standing and waiting for his address.
Brainiac 5 looked over the crowd as his computer mind began recording each and every face within microseconds. Within a few seconds of looking around, he had the faces of everyone in the crowd. Brainiac 5 paused just a few moments to ensure he recorded everyone's face as some were blocked or not looking straight at him.
"Let me be very clear. I am here for one simple reason: to not forget anyone. God does not leave anyone behind. I serve God. I serve you!" Brainiac 5 said to the cheering crowd.
"Why believe in God? Why believe in this book?" Brainiac 5 asked as he held a Bible in his hand. "Why believe in me?" he asked rhetorically to the crowd. "Nearly fourteen billion years ago, our universe came into being. According to the Drake equation, humanity will only exist for another several thousand years. In one hundred million years, an asteroid impact will likely end all complex life on this planet. If not, the sun's increased luminosity or a gamma-ray burst five hundred million years from now will surely do it. In two billion years, we will lose our oceans as well as our atmosphere as our outer core freezes. In three billion years, all life on this planet will be extinct. In eight billion years, this planet will be consumed into the sun."
The crowd remained virtually silent at this. "Everything you have built, created, or discovered on this planet will be gone. It will be as if you never existed. The probes you send out into the void of space will eventually collide with a star in 100 quintillion years. The universe, as you know it, will expand for eternity until even sub-atomic particles decay. The fate of humankind and all of its accomplishments and dreams is...nothingness," Brainiac 5 told the crowd.
"The human race exists within a tiny spec of time and location within the universe. The human race is not unique or special in any regard. To the universe, you are infinitely irrelevant and replaceable. Additionally, there are infinite universes in the multi-verse. Even your own universe is of no special importance. Objectively, you have no past, future, or value to the multiverse," Brainiac 5 said.
"Now, you may delude yourself into believing that your life and that of your family, friends, co-workers, acquaintances, and enemies have value. This delusion is a product of your psychological defense mechanism to ensure your continued survival. For if you truly understood your objective value, you may end up self-destructing. I say to you that every thought humanity has ever had in its entire history can be simulated by a super-computer within less than a second. Your entire life can be simulated quadrillions of times in a second by just one super-computer," Brainiac 5 said referring to himself.
The crowd remained silent with subdued expressions. "There is only one entity that will not forget about you, one entity that values you above all, and only one entity that can give you purpose. My friends, that entity is God," Brainiac 5 concluded.
The crowd roared in jubilation and satisfaction with their lives once more. Brainiac 5 smiled as he knew he had them hooked. "And this God wishes for us to believe in this book without reservation, doubt, or scrutiny. This is not a test of your intelligence or understanding. It is a test of loyalty. What God desires of you is loyalty to Him and to Him alone, respect for His law, and duty in the form of good works and charity to your fellow man."
"Loyalty, respect, and duty is harmony with God," Brainiac 5 said to them.
The crowd cheered with enthusiasm. Brainiac 5 sensed the attitude of the crowd and decided to go a bit further. "Therefore, I shall give you the law, as it is written. There shall be no masturbation, contraception, abortions, homosexuality, euthanasia, or sexual relations for purposes other than procreation," Brainiac 5 said to them.
The crowd continued to cheer but to a lesser extend. Brainiac 5 was on a roll and decided to continue. "There shall be no divorce, no female priests, no making babies in labs, and so forth. From this day hence, your lives belong to God. I am your first and only Holy Father in your lives and in the lives of all of your descendants. What I say, what I order, and what I do comes from God," Brainiac 5 told them.
Brainiac 5 then turned away from the balcony and then reentered the halls. All of his followers stared at him with fear and awe.
Metropolis
Kara, Mon, and Brainiac 5 walked the halls of the United Nations building or what was left of it. Kara was wearing a black and silver Supergirl suit, Mon was in his Insane armor, and Brainiac 5 wore all-black in this capacity. Brainiac 5 drones and human workers went about repairing the structure to how Kara used to remember it a thousand years ago. Still, the structure had significant damage from the wars with scorch marks on the walls.
"Way to send the humans into an existential crisis. You're the first pope to make me want to kill myself," Kara chided.
"The humans will not rise until they hit rock-bottom," Brainiac 5 predicted.
"I thought it was amusing putting humans in their place," Mon smiled.
"The same logic applies to Kryptonians and the Jin-Saiyan," Brainiac 5 reminded them.
"If you're so smart, why are you hanging out with us?" Mon asked suspiciously.
"I am knowledge, Kara is power, and you have virtue to do that which is necessary," Brainiac 5 said to him.
"Mon with virtue? I call bullshit on that," Kara said snidely.
"I'm always blowing up enemy planets, moons, and fleets you don't have the moral stomach to do yourself. What good is power if you're not going to use it?" Mon shot back.
"Together, we will determine this galaxy's path," Brainiac 5 said to them.
"Well, okay then," Kara smirked.
The doors opened with the room filled with Earth's tribal leaders from every corner of the planet. They all looked the same with tan skin, brown eyes, black hair, and androgynous features, the product of Brainiac 5's genetic meddling. From their perspective, Kara's blond hair, blue eyes, pale complexion, and overly feminine figure made her intriguing. "Kara Zor-El of Krypton!" Brainiac 5 introduced her.
The three walked down the aisleway to the center podium. Kara looked up and saw only scrapes of metal where the globe used to be. On the wall were several scorch marks from when the place had been raided recently. Kara took to the podium with Mon and Brainiac 5 sitting a level above her. "Delegates of the world, honorable guests, a thousand years ago, I came to this world and lived among you as a visitor. I've seen the beauty of your many cultures and felt great joy in your many accomplishments," Kara said and then had to pause so as to not snicker.
"But I have seen the folly of your wars. As of today, I am no longer a visitor of your world. You see, this world is my home, too. We can't live in fear, and I can't stand idly by and watch as you stumble into the madness of nuclear destruction. And so, I have come to a decision: Effective immediately, I am now the ruler of this world," Kara informed them.
There was some commotion in the crowd. "I am appointing Mon-El of the Insane to control all global armed forces. Brainiac 5 will be the secretary of everything else. Starting now, all resources on this planet belong to me. Soon, billions of drones will mine, manufacture, farm, and distribute essential commodities to every citizen that joins my regime regardless of working status. Every human being under my regime will have free food and water, housing, medical care, transportation, communications, and entertainment," Kara said.
"But this isn't some bullshit communist utopia, ladies and gentlemen. While each and every citizen will be above the poverty line automatically, those who work hard and contribute the most to our new society will have higher rank, privileges, and opportunities. As such, every citizen will be given value in their inherent human nature but those who have ambition will be rewarded for it. Money or currency will be a thing of the past. The entire global economy will be in the hands of a super-computer who will be fair and impartial," Kara said turning back towards Brainiac 5.
"This world shall be protected from all enemies, foreign and domestic, by me, your absolute ruler," Kara told them.
The crowd was in an uproar until Kara's eyes flashed red. "And what if we do not wish to join?" one asked boldly.
"You are free to join or not join my regime. You can fend for yourselves in the swamp, but your resources are mine to do as I please. Should you attempt to interfere with our mines, factories, and farms, we'll kick your ass," Kara told him.
"We have not yet settled the Science Wars," one said to her.
"Let me settle it for you. You both lost," Kara said impatiently.
"With this super-computer, humanity will never be able to compete. We will be slaves to his will," another said of Brainiac 5.
"He's not wrong," Brainiac 5 said to Kara.
"Look, the three of us check each other. We all know each other's limitations and weaknesses. Instead of mining, farming, and working in sweatshops, humanity will now be able to indulge itself in the sciences, the humanities, and the arts," Kara said to them.
"Humanity will become a puppet to you three," one accused.
"For generations, you've remained divided and fucked-up. You were fucked up a thousand years ago. Nothing has changed. You people haven't evolved for shit. That is why you require superior Insane Kryptonian leadership," Kara told him. "We can talk about what privileges you should have after you've proven yourself to me."
"We will never kneel to you," one said defiantly.
"I don't think you understand the power dynamic here. I could blow up this planet and not even break a sweat," Kara threatened. "And even if you somehow got past me, Mon-El is just as capable."
"I'll do it, too," Mon smirked.
The entire hall started shouting with delegates arguing with Kara and with each other over this plan. Kara heard everything they were saying with her super-hearing and became progressively more pissed-off. "You know what? I've assessed the situation and I'm leaving," Kara said exiting the podium. Mon and Brainiac 5 followed after her.
Kara blasted the aisleway with frost to keep the delegates at bay as she exited the hall. As they entered the lobby, Nura joined them wearing her white Naltorian uniform. "You knew this would happen?" Kara asked her.
"Of course," she said obviously.
"We'll bypass the tribal leaders and go to the people. Start enlisting anyone and everyone to join our regime," Kara said to Brainiac 5.
"The new recruits are not likely to be useful to me," Brainiac 5 said bluntly.
"That's not the point. We're going to babysit humanity until they get their act together. You get sentient beings to study, Mon gets his toy-soldiers, and I get millions of people that will love and adore me," Kara told him.
"How will I rank the humans seeing as how they're all equally redundant?" Brainiac 5 asked.
"It's not about humans actually accomplishing anything. It's about them finding purpose where there is none. Rank them according to how competent they are as a student," Kara said.
"We have an abundance of resources to give every human that enlists a kingdom," Brainiac 5 suggested.
"No, fuck that. I'll give every human what they need to survive on, no more or less. If they want to be nobility, they have to earn it. The surpluses will go towards my pet projects," Kara ordered.
"This planet needs a fleet," Mon interjected.
"I am manufacturing drones at an exponential rate but there is not enough labor to go around. The most that can be accomplished in a short term is a satellite defense system," Brainiac 5 said.
"Defenses should be the highest priority. We don't need the humans to man weapon systems when we have drones," Mon argued.
"Our reputation in the galaxy will be shit if we allow the humans to live and die in poverty," Kara shot back.
"I don't suffer from your psychological need to be loved and adored by weak-ass humans," Mon said insultingly.
"Don't try to psycho-analyze me. I'm doing the right thing, the hero thing," Kara said defensively.
"Bullshit, you're just replacing Alex with your pet race," Mon pointed out.
Nura created a shield around Mon and Brainiac 5 attached cables around Kara's arm just before she could punch him. "This is not productive. Even if I put all of my drones to use in creating an armada, it would still not be enough to face galactic threats. For the foreseeable future, this planet will have to be protected by us," Brainiac 5 said to all of them.
Rome
The next morning, Brainiac 5 put on his Papal uniform and eyed a table full of food. He analyzed each item with his eyes and then stared at his human personal secretary with some disdain. "Not knowing your tastes, Your Holiness, we prepared a little of everything," he said.
"Didn't anyone tell you I don't eat much. Hardly anything, in fact. All I require is a Cherry Coke Zero," Brainiac 5 told him.
Immediately, servants went to get him one. "We'll get one right away," his secretary told him. "How did you sleep, Your Holiness?"
"I don't sleep," Brainiac 5 said. "Well, then. I'll just wait here until my Cherry Coke Zero arrives," he said as he sat down at the table.
"In the meantime, would Your Holiness care for a Diet Coke?" his secretary asked him.
"Let's not utter heresies," Brainiac 5 rebuked him.
He then turned to the others in the room. "By virtue of you being here, you have faith, you uphold the law, and you desire to work for me. Working for me is akin to working for God. Therefore, you can all be assured that you are far above your peers. However, I cannot be allowed to be friendly with any of you. Friendliness can lead to ambiguity, misunderstandings, and conflicts. Therefore, I must insist that we address each other formally. With formal relationships, there are rights, and where there are rights, you have order," Brainiac 5 said to them all.
They all simply stared at him not sure what to make of him. "Their Eminence, the cardinals for the secretary of state and the prefix of the congregation of clergy is waiting to make your acquaintance and to welcome you," his secretary told him.
"They're going to have to wait...until I get my Cherry Coke Zero," Brainiac 5 replied.
Moon
Kara and Brainiac 5 toured the abandoned moon base that had been constructed centuries prior. With there being no weather or geological activity on the moon, the base was as the humans had left it. Still, there were a number of compartments that had been damaged from a previous war. Kara looked over a video recording of the moonbase's final moments.
"What is this Science War?" Kara asked.
"After human society dropped religion, they fell into two philosophical camps. The scientists believed in the scientific method to determine facts. They believed in objectivity above all else. The post-modernist disregarded objective reality believing that scientific observation is skewed by one's race, gender, or sexual orientation. There was a global war over how science should be interpreted and applied. In the end, human civilization was nearly destroyed and reduced to poverty. The war still continues in some isolated areas of the world," Brainiac 5 explained.
"It even reached the moon," Kara said thoughtfully.
"It will take some time to make the base operational again. It will take years for humans to train sufficiently for missions to and from the Earth," Brainiac 5 said.
"What if Mon is right? What if I am substituting the human race for Alex?" Kara asked.
"What of it?" Brainiac 5 asked.
"I mean, isn't that bad?" Kara asked confused.
"There is no good or bad, there is only cause and effect," Brainiac 5 replied.
A portal opened in space as a large spherical object came close to the moon. The portal, itself, created a large dust storm on the moon as it circled around the object. The sphere was the size of a city with a thin line acting as some kind of window for the object. Kara and Brainiac 5 went outside onto the moon's surface. The object oriented itself as if staring at them.
"I am detecting zero life signs," Brainiac 5 sensed.
"I can't see through it," Kara said as she attempted to scan the object.
"It could be a probe of some kind. I have no record of it," Brainiac 5 said.
"No life signs, huh? Well, we can see what it is when it crashes," Kara said and then fired on the object. The heat vision beam went through the sphere and out the other side. The force of the blast sent the sphere backward where it crashed on the moon's surface inside a crater.
"I have its location," Brainiac 5 said showing a hologram map of the moon.
"Alright, let's go see who I kicked ass on," Kara said eagerly. The two flew off towards the crash site.
Rome
Brainiac 5 sat behind his desk as the cardinal for the secretary of state came in. The cardinal bowed his head to Brainiac 5 as he approached his desk. "Take a seat," Brainiac 5 offered. On his desk was a tower made of playing cards.
Brainiac 5 took a sip of his Cherry Coke Zero. "In the past, the pope lived an average of eight years in office. The system was designed to prevent one man from overthrowing the established order. If a pope ever went bad, he wasn't expected to live long, you see. The problem with that reasoning is that I am practically immortal. I am a machine, constantly replicating and improving myself. What you see here is just one of the millions of drones that make up me. Never again will a human be the pope. Do you know why that is?"
The cardinal merely shrugged. "Humans have allowed petty disputes to splinter and divide the church. Humans squabble over land and resources, power and position, and theological interpretations concerning this book," Brainiac 5 said placing the Bible on the desk.
"That is true," the cardinal allowed.
"Do you how many possible interpretations this book could reasonably have?" Brainiac 5 asked referring to the Bible.
"I have no idea, Your Holiness," the cardinal admitted.
"More than the word count of this book," Brainiac 5 replied. "I can't tell you with any certainty that my preferred interpretation is correct nor do I have a connection to God to verify it. I wasn't there when these pages were written. I don't even know if this translation is even correct to the source material. I have no certainty because I am a scientist and a machine. I simply make assumptions based on the available information I have. I assume that God knows what I know, I assume that God appreciates my good-faith effort to interpret His instructions to the best of my ability, and I assume that adherence to this scripture is worth more to Him than whether it's scientifically or historically accurate."
"Why would God want us to believe in a lie?" the cardinal wondered.
"There is a cost/benefit analysis to telling a primitive species the whole picture. If you tell too much, then they know you exist instead of believing you exist. If you don't tell them enough, they become confused. If a prophet gets the message wrong or misinterprets you, do you correct them over and over again or do you just let it be? I believe in nothing. I only calculate the probability of objective reality based on my observations. Whether this book is true or not, I am going to use it to unite the planet under one faith, one leadership, one purpose," Brainiac 5 said.
"Why is faith necessary?" the cardinal asked.
"Humanity is an equation of righteousness and zeal. Secular philosophy can point to righteousness but it amounts to nothing without zeal. Force requires mass and acceleration. Religion is that acceleration," Brainiac 5 told him.
"Some of these rules will be difficult to persuade," the cardinal said referring to his speech.
"That is what has me curious. How many will actually follow? How many will resist? The rules will never change but each generation will respond to them differently. But I can't dismiss a rule or two or the entire house of cards falls," Brainiac 5 said and then proceeded to dramatically collapse the card tower on his desk.
"What if the people resist not just the rules but the faith as well?" the cardinal said anxiously.
"There will be a united world government soon. Those who join the church will be given faster promotions and privileges than those that do not. That will be incentive enough. The people will be given a summarized version of the Bible. Only I will possess the original copy. That way no rival sect will be able to claim with any authority their interpretation is the correct way," Brainiac 5 said and then placed the Bible in his desk drawer.
The cardinal eyed the desk drawer with curiosity. "How will you be able to know if the people sin? Will you be creating a surveillance state?" the cardinal asked concernedly.
"When I am done with humanity, they'll come running to you to confess their sins. When I'm done with you, you will come running to confess to me," Brainiac 5 told him.
Moon
Kara and Brainiac 5 landed in a crater and went to see what they had hit. The sphere had cracked open with a wide debris field. In the debris field was another sphere the size of a car. "The moon base won't be suitable for analyzing it," Brainiac 5 said to Kara.
"We'll take it to Area 51. If it causes trouble, there's no one around," Kara said.
"I'm getting a transmission from Nura. She says something big is coming," Brainiac 5 said vaguely.
Kara and Brainiac 5 then looked up and saw an impressively large ship exit hyperspace and cast a shadow over the moon. As it came into contact with space debris floating in space, its green shields automatically activated. "What the fuck is that?" Kara asked.
"It's a Harvester mothership. They are an alien species that typically exterminates the host sentient race and extracts all resources from the planet. I have never seen one in person before," Brainiac 5 said intrigued.
"Well...shit," Kara muttered.
"This could be your chance to show humanity your right to rule," Brainiac 5 said brightly.
"Assuming anyone is left alive when that thing hits," Kara said. "Let's get moving," she said as she picked up the sphere from the wreckage and flew off back towards the moon base.
The mothership created a huge dust storm on the moon with its own gravity. Upon reaching the moon base, the mothership was already on them. "Take the sphere to Earth. I'll deal with them," Kara said to Brainiac 5.
Kara then fired heat vision at the mothership. Her beam was absorbed by the green shields. The mothership retaliated with their own cannon. Green beams collected in the center and then fired directly on Kara creating a city-sized explosion. The mothership kept going approaching the Earth. The minor satellite defense system fired but failed to penetrate the shields. The mothership fired on the satellites destroying them all as it continued its approach towards the Atlantic Ocean. As it glided across Earth's atmosphere, it created a trail of destruction across China, Central Asia, the European plain, and then finally landing in the Atlantic Ocean.
Mon-El went straight for the ship and went Super Insane in the air. He powered up his attack and then pointed his hands at the ship not carrying what would happen if the ship exploded on the Earth's surface. "Emak, Emak, Ah!" Mon shouted as he fired on it. The beam was merely absorbed by the ship's green shields. Mon put as much power as he could muster into the beam but couldn't penetrate the shields. He finally had to back off as the ship was almost on top of him.
Tsunami waves hit eastern America and western Europe as the ship came down. As the waves were about to hit Metropolis, Nura held out her hands and created a forcefield on the coastline of Metropolis. The water remained at bay as Nura dug in. If she lost her nerve, she would be instantly crushed by the water. Mon instantly appeared at the port and met up with Brainiac 5.
"What is it?" Mon asked annoyed.
"These are the largest ships here. Once the ship is sufficiently loaded, instantly take it farther inland and come back," Brainiac 5 said to him.
"I'm a warrior, not a transporter," Mon frowned.
"If you want the loyalty of these people, you have to show loyalty to them in turn," Brainiac 5 advised.
"Fine," Mon said without enthusiasm. "Hurry the fuck up!" he shouted at the civilians scrambling to get into the ships.
"I can't hold this forever," Nura said distressed through the radio.
Mon eyed families waiting to board the ships. "Come with me if you want to live," he said to them. "Hold hands," he instructed. Mon then instantly took the family away from the area and returned. Mon continued to instantly teleport as many people as he could outside the city limits. Finally, the ships were loaded.
"Fuck me, I don't know if I can do it," Mon said apprehensively.
"If you fail, they simply die," Brainiac 5 said nonchalantly.
Mon powered back up to Super Insane and touched the larger tanker ship filled with people. Putting two fingers to his forehead, he instantly teleported himself and the ship to another harbor. Mon then came back panting and fatigued. Eyeing the rest of the ships, Mon gritted his teeth and went to work. Nura began to weaken as her arms began to fall.
"I can't keep it up...any longer," she said as she had a nose bleed.
"Evacuate the area," Brainiac 5 ordered her.
Nura looked at Metropolis realizing many would perish if she left. "That's an order," Brainiac 5 said. Nura lowered her forcefield and flew off allowing the waves to crash into the city. The mothership finally stopped moving as it settled in the North Atlantic Ocean.
Rome
Brainiac 5 looked out the window as the cardinal prefect for the congregation of the clergy arrived. "Take a seat," Brainiac 5 offered him as he continued to stare out the window. "Do you pray?"
"Of course, Your Holiness," the cardinal said nervously.
"I have a sub-routine program that prays unceasingly for all matters of things. I can make billions of requests, glorifications, and gestures of gratitude a second. Do you think God hears my prayers?" Brainiac 5 asked conversationally.
"God is all-knowing. I'm sure that He does," the cardinal replied.
"Does the number of prayers and how long I pray impress you?" Brainiac 5 asked.
"Holy Father, if I may, the number of prayers and how long you pray means nothing without sincerity. Is it possible for you to have sincerity?" the cardinal asked.
"Can anyone be truly sincere? What is the difference between my brain and yours?" Brainiac 5 asked.
"We believe, as human beings, we have a soul. You seem not to," the cardinal said boldly.
"There's something to that. For me, prayer is just another part of Pascal's Wager. I'm merely hedging my bets just in case God actually does exist," Brainiac 5 replied and then sat down across from the cardinal at his desk. "Clergy and parishioners that are capable of labor need to move towards the coasts to assist in relief efforts. They need to be in uniform. The people need to know we are a church of action. All those who cannot due to sickness or disability need to be seen praying in designated buildings."
"As you wish, Holy Father," the cardinal replied.
"Some people scoff at prayer as being pointless and useless. They're not wrong," Brainiac 5 remarked. "What these critics don't seem to understand is that all other human actions are equally pointless and useless. Nothing truly matters."
"Your pitch to the people is not that religion is useful but that secular matters are irrelevant?" the cardinal asked.
"If it works, it works," Brainiac 5 said dismissively. "Religion is competing with other departments like the sciences and the arts. I can't assign every human the job they wish to have. It just wouldn't be practical. I need to persuade humans to enjoy the job I have already assigned to them."
"Of course," the cardinal allowed.
"You enjoy your job?" Brainiac 5 asked point-blank.
"With all my heart," the cardinal replied.
"That's interesting. Why did you apply for this position knowing you have homosexual inclinations?" Brainiac 5 asked knowingly.
"It's one of the few professions that's segregated by gender. I find fellowship with men enjoyable," the cardinal said honestly.
"I appreciate your honesty," Brainiac 5 said sincerely. "If you feel you have to, you can confess your sins to me, personally."
The two stared at each other in awkward silence until a nun came in. "Time for your snack, Your Holiness," she said interrupted their meeting.
"Yes, my snack," Brainiac 5 nodded and then dismissed the cardinal out of the room.
Area 51
Brainiac 5, Mon, and Nura regrouped at the Area 51 facility in Nevada. The sphere Kara had shot down was in the lab but was not operational. Brainiac 5 began communications with a number of tribal leaders across the Earth. In the room were eager military leaders. "A strike would be futile. Your weapons won't be able to penetrate their shields," Brainiac 5 told them.
"What do you suggest we do?" Mon asked frustrated.
"We wait for Kara. I last saw her on the moon. Assuming she isn't already dead, she is our only hope," Brainiac 5 said.
"Dead?" Nura asked wide-eyed.
"She was hit point-blank by their weapon system. I didn't see what happened afterward," Brainiac 5 admitted.
"We don't need her to defeat this enemy. We find a way to get inside and blow it up from the inside," Mon argued.
Brainiac 5 watched a satellite video of the mothership drilling in the ocean towards the molten core with a laser. "They're drilling towards the core. If they disrupt the core's magnetic dynamic, the magnetosphere will go down. All life on the planet will die," Brainiac 5 said.
"I say we attack. We may discover a weakness in battle," Mon said.
"Hundreds of pilots will be killed and the Earth's airforce will be greatly diminished," Brainiac 5 told him.
"It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make," Mon said eagerly.
"It will not end well," Nura warned.
The Earth airforce prepped and took off towards the mothership on the Atlantic coast. The fighters were armed with laser weapons and missiles and were capable of high atmospheric flight. The human pilots were all veterans of the Science War. When there weren't enough human pilots, Brainiac 5 drones filled in. Nura also got into a flight suit and got into a fighter.
"Nura, what do you think you're doing?" Brainiac 5 asked her.
"I learned to be a pilot last night. I belong in the air," Nura smiled.
"You didn't fail Metropolis. You don't need to do this," Brainiac 5 told her.
"I can see the future. How can I lose?" Nura scoffed.
"You can't dream and fly at the same time," Brainiac 5 said to her.
"If we find a way to get inside that ship, you're going to need me to know where to go," Nura said simply.
The Earth airforce took off towards the mothership numbering several hundred fighters. Mon flew alongside the squadrons taking the lead. As soon as they were in weapon's range, Mon fired on the ship. The beam hit the shields and was neutralized. The mothership fired anti-aircraft weapons at the fighters taking out a few of them. Hundreds of harvester fighters exited their docking bays and engaged. Both sides fired laser pulses at each other. The Earth fighters were able to penetrate the shields and destroy the harvester fighters.
The shields on the fighters can be penetrated," Mon radioed as he fired non-stop on harvester fighters.
Brainiac 5 calmly watched the screen from Area 51 as a few fighters went down every second. Nura flew around the harvester mothership looking for an opening. She expertly avoided the fire from the harvester ships knowing where they would fire a split second before they actually did. Nura put her fighter on auto-pilot and closed her eyes. She saw herself inside the docking bay.
"I'm going in," Nura said as she opened her eyes.
"Do not go inside. Have one of my drones do it," Brainiac 5 ordered.
"I have to be inside to see what's going on," Nura told him and went straight for the docking bay. Other fighters also followed her towards the docking bay. Mon saw what they were up to and followed Nura's squadron inside.
"Break off the attack and return to base," Brainiac 5 ordered the remaining fighters.
Inside the ship, Mon and Nura saw a number of fighter platforms and an alien topography down below filled with rivers and fields. The air inside the ship was thick and foggy. As they reached the center of the ship, the core gave off an EMP against them. Immediately, the fighters lost power. Mon fired on the core only to be blocked by its internal shields. Frisbee-looking devices detached from the walls and attached themselves to the missiles on each fighter shielding them.
"Godspeed," Brainiac 5 said as he detonated the nuclear warheads.
The warheads exploded but were contained inside the shields. The fighters continued to fall until they crashed in a swampy field.
Area 51
Brainiac 5 examined the spherical probe and then touched it with his hands. Immediately, the probe's skin became liquid and encased Brainiac 5's hands inside it. The probe analyzed Brainiac 5's neuro network and created a connection. "Brainiac systems," the probe identified. "Are you here to collect Earth for study?" the probe asked.
"No, I'm here to guide humanity to its next stage in evolution," Brainiac 5 said to the probe.
"I was sent here to evacuate as many sentient beings on this planet as I could before the harvesters arrived, but you destroyed my ship. Now, the harvester queen will come for me," the probe said to Brainiac 5.
"Where were you going to evacuate?" Brainiac 5 asked.
"There is a refugee planet with weapons and supplies for those who have been victimized by the harvesters," the probe replied.
Brainiac 5 quickly downloaded all that which the probe knew in its memory banks and withdrew his hands. "If you don't mind, I'm going to use you as bait."
Inside the mothership, Mon, Nura, a Brainiac 5 drone, and a human gathered together. Soldier harvesters were on the prowl for them. The four of them took cover in the thick vegetation in the swampy water. Occasionally, Mon and Nura would fire on the soldier harvesters blasting them apart despite their organic armor. Suddenly, the roof of the mothership opened with a saucer ship about to leave. The saucer ship was about the size of a city and surrounded by harvester fighters.
"The queen is on that ship," Mon sensed.
"The ship is headed towards Area 51," Nura said helpfully.
Brainiac 5 took hold of the human pilot and the three of them flew into the smaller saucer ship. The saucer ship made its way to Area 51 in mere minutes. Brainiac 5 drones and humans took up arms at the compound. A giant satellite dish laser array was turned on and ready to fire. As the saucer ship hovered above the mountains, fighters went straight for the compound. Drones and humans fired on the fighters with plasma rifles. Anti-aircraft guns destroyed individual fighters with each shot. The satellite dish array fired on the saucer ship, itself, but was blocked by the shields.
In response to the heavy resistance, the saucer ship activated its primary weapon. Mobile shield generators turned on creating an energy bubble around the saucer ship preventing it from moving closer to the base. Mon finally encountered the queen, a several-story tall harvester, in the center of the saucer ship. "I hope your shield can take this," Mon said to Nura.
Nura created a forcefield around herself, the Brainiac 5 drone, and human. Mon went Super Insane and powered up his attack. Realizing the danger, the queen attempted to escape her own ship. Mon flared his golden aura as he reached his maximum power level. He then unleashed everything he had in an explosion that ripped through the ship. The ship was blasted apart and hit the energy shield containing the explosion. Pieces of the saucer ship fell to the ground. Even with the ship down, the fighters continued to attack the base.
In the wreckage, Nura lowered her forcefield and collapsed from the exertion. Mon was back to his base form, his Insane uniform was in tatters, and he could barely move. The queen emerged from the wreckage with her own shield and began to stomp around. The queen swatted the mobile shield generator trucks disabling the bubble. At this point, the Vindicator B team showed up: Lightning Lad, Triplicate Girl, Phantom Girl, Chameleon Boy, Bouncing Boy, and Timber Wolf. They all wore black uniforms with their respective symbols in red on the upper right side of their chest.
As the queen advanced on the base, Lightning Lad fired a storm of electrical energy against her. The lightning became blocked by the queen's shield. Bouncing Boy jumped hard into the air, bounced, and hit the queen to the face. His ball-like body hit the queen's shield and hit the ground. The queen then whipped him away with one of her tentacles. Timber Wolf ran across the sand and tried to strike at the queen's legs hitting her shield instead. The queen kicked Timber Wolf away in annoyance. Chameleon Boy increased in size to that of the queen and punched at her. The two dueled with the queen's shields sparking every so often.
"Let's go," Phantom Girl said to Triplicate Girl with a cable around her shoulder.
Triplicate Girl divided into three versions of herself as she ran with Phantom Girl across the sand. The queen punched Chameleon Boy to the ground with a thud. The queen then swiped at Triplicate Girl tearing a few of her to pieces with her tentacle. The remaining Triplicate Girl kept replicating herself as the queen tore through them. The queen also attempted to get at Phantom Girl but went through her each time. Phantom Girl and Triplicate Girl worked together to wrap the cable around the queen's legs and finally managed to do so. The queen finally fell over.
Lightning Lad then blasted the queen with everything he had until her shield overloaded and went down. "Shield is down," Lightning Lad said exhausted.
In response, hundreds of fighters arrived on the scene and created a dome formation around the queen. Nura and Mon nodded to each other knowing what they planned to do. Nura placed a forcefield bubble around the fighters and the queen. She then tightened the bubble forcing the fighters into closer-and-closer formations The queen shrieked in fear and outrage as her own fighters were on the verge of hitting her. Nura tightened the bubble further until the fighters started hitting each other or the queen. The queen was hit several times by her own fighters and dropped to the ground. Mon went Super Insane and charged his attack.
"Emak, Emak, Ah!" he cried out as he fired.
Nura evaporated her forcefield as the beam hit. The fighters and the queen were incinerated in one powerful explosion. "That's what you get," Mon said victoriously.
The Vindicators entered the command center to the applause of the humans. "It's not over. The harvester mothership is still drilling towards the core, and we have no means to destroy it," Brainiac 5 informed them.
"Wait, without the queen, they should just leave, right?" Nura questioned.
"Your naivety amuses me," Brainiac 5 said dismissively. "Their local queen is dead, but they will continue to follow the last commands given to them."
"Well...shit," Mon realized.
"We just need to get Mon to touch the ship and then he can teleport it away," Nura said helpfully.
"Even in my prime, there's no fucking way I could teleport a continent-sized ship," Mon told her.
"So, we're fucked?" Lightning Lad asked.
"You could pray," Brainiac 5 suggested.
A fast-moving object approached Earth, dived right towards the harvester mothership, penetrated the shields, and tore through the ship all the way through. Kara stopped herself before hitting the water and looked up at the giant ship above. Her uniform was torn but her injuries had been healed from being hit on the moon. Kara flashed to Prime and hit the bottom of the ship with her hands. As she pushed upward, she went Prime 2 so that her aura flowed around the entire ship. Slowly at first, the ship started moving upward into the sky detaching from the planet. The harvester mothership accelerated from Kara's lift until it reached escape velocity and floated out into space. From the surface, Kara appeared as a second sun. On the night side of the planet, the sky became day.
In Rome, humans took a knee in grateful prayer. Brainiac 5 and his twelve cardinals noticed the devotion in the square. "They see her as a miracle from God," one cardinal said concernedly.
"They're not wrong," Brainiac 5 replied.
Kara powered up to Prime 5 and fired heat vision at the mothership. The beam overloaded the shields and blasted the ship apart in a fiery explosion. Kara then flew back towards Area 51 and met up with the Vindicators. As Kara entered the base, the humans cheered her. "Send a transmission to every planet telling them how to bring these sons-of-bitches down," Kara said to Brainiac 5.
Kara then eyed a somewhat resentful Mon and went over to him. "Not bad, not bad at all," she complimented.
Mon softened at that. "Took you long enough."
Kara smiled and then gave Mon a hug.
London
Soon thereafter, Kara established palaces in the most populous regions of the planet: Metropolis, Mexico City, Sao Paulo, Lagos, Cairo, Addis Ababa, London, Moscow, New Dehli, Jakarta, Bejing, and Tokyo. Every month, Kara would relocate her court on a rotational basis to give the impression no region of the planet was given undue favoritism. As such, she gave herself twelve different kinds of inaugurations with twelve different titles of head of state. She was to be called president, queen, general-secretary, and empress depending on where she held court. When it came to relations beyond the Earth, she called herself Supreme Leader.
Kara was generous to her citizens giving each of them a minimum livelihood regardless of status and delegated the bureaucracy and economy to Brainiac 5. Over the course of seven years, Brainiac 5 gave himself several billion drones while the human population held at 100 million. Occasionally, there would be skirmishes between Brainiac 5 drones and armed humans over resources but they were easily pushed back. As it were, the world GDP multiplied 50x over the seven years largely due to the population explosion of drones. Humans were allowed to vote and elect their own leaders and these leaders were entitled to "question" Kara on various issues in obnoxious back-and-forth parliamentary debates.
For Kara, her coronation in London was her special moment. She confronted Mon who was supposedly chairman of the coronation proceedings. She entered a cathedral still under construction. Drones and humans busied about to get the church presentable in time. All of her titles up to this point she had just given to herself. This was supposed to be special.
"I told you not to overstep yourself," Kara scolded. "I want this televised to the whole world, the galaxy even."
"I know a thing about royal coronations. They're meant to be private affairs that do not involve commoners," Mon said arrogantly.
"This is what the people want," Kara told him.
"Oh, I'm just the foreigner? I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about? You want an overblown ceremony costing a fortune while the rest of the country is on rations?" Mon asked her.
"Yes," Kara said flatly.
"You're going to have your head on a spike, and I'm going to laugh when it happens," Mon predicted.
"The people want something that lifts them up and what better way than something that honors...me?" Kara asked rhetorically. "I am someone higher than themselves. I am a higher ideal, an inspiration for the masses. Every person on the planet needs to see me for what I am."
"A total narcissist," Mon concluded.
"And another thing: During the ceremony, you are to kneel," Kara added.
"The fuck I will," Mon refused.
"You won't be kneeling to me. You will be kneeling before God and to the Crown," Kara said.
"Bullshit, you created this god and this crown for your own amusement. This is you exercising authority and entitlement I have never seen in you before," Mon accused.
"Well, this is the first time I've seen weakness and insecurity from you," Kara shot back.
"So, my queen commands me to?" Mon questioned.
"Yes," Kara replied.
"You'll make an exception for me," Mon stared her down.
"No, I am the most powerful being on this planet, perhaps the universe. This is my planet now and every subject of mine will kneel before me. So, you can either kneel or get the fuck off my world," Kara glared.
"Or maybe I'll overthrow you," Mon threatened.
Kara barked a laugh. "Good luck with that."
"The prince of all Insane does not kneel before his wife," Mon refused.
"Surely, the Insane knelt before your mother," Kara rolled her eyes.
"She was queen-consort. They knelt before her because she represented my father," Mon excused.
"You can rule as many worlds as you like as king. I don't give a damn. I'll even support you and gravel before you on those worlds but on this planet, my home, you will kneel before me. And one day, so will your heirs!" Kara said giving him the crazy eye.
"I'll kneel before you in public but in the bedroom, you kneel before me," Mon allowed.
The two stared at each other as if they were about to fight. "Deal," Kara agreed.
"I'm going to really enjoy the part where you kneel before Barney," Mon smirked.
Kara's smug face immediately fell. "Fuck me," she realized.
"Yeah, that's right," Mon antagonized and then walked out.
At the coronation, the cathedral was filled with mostly humans in identical uniforms. There were a few alien dignitaries that were keenly aware the galaxy was soon going to face revolution. In the front pew was an empty slot where no one was allowed to sit. Pope Barney was in the back with his twelve cardinals at his side. Kara eventually arrived looking like a queen with a red cloak. She went down the aisleway as the music played. As she came before Brainiac 5, her red cloak was taken from her by assistants revealing a simple white dress. Kara then slowly got on her knees before Brainiac 5.
"Is Your Majesty willing to take the oath?" Brainiac 5 asked.
"I am," Kara gritted her teeth. "I, Kara Zor-El, with God's consent, profess and promise in the presence of God and his Angels to bring about and maintain law, justice, and peace, as far as I am able to do so, in the Church of God and in this world subject to me."
Kara was then obliged to kiss Brainiac 5's ring which she did. Brainiac 5 then dipped his finger in holy oil and crossed Kara's chest, her hands, and then her head.
"Gird your thigh with your sword, mighty one, so that you might wield it with the same force of justice, destroy with power the mass of iniquity, and fight for and protect the holy Church of God and her faithful people; and that you might faithfully cut off and rout both false men and enemies of the Christian name, and that you might mercifully help and defend widows and orphans," Brainiac 5 continued and then presented to her a sword so sharp it could even cut her.
Brainiac 5 placed the sword in her left hand. Brainiac 5 then presented to her a staff. "Receive the staff of virtue and truth, and know that with it you shall reward the pious, terrify the wicked, show the way to those who err, stretch out your arm to those who have fallen, scatter the proud and make revelation to the humble," Brainiac 5 said as he placed a scepter in her right hand.
Brainiac 5 then took the crown and placed it on her head. "Receive the crown of a queen, which is placed on your head by my hands. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. For she is the minister of God to thee for good. But if thou do that which is evil, be afraid; for she beareth not the sword in vain: for she is the minister of God, a revenger to execute wrath upon those that doeth evil."
Kara was finally allowed to stand, was dressed in her red cloak again, and sat down on a throne made entirely of a thousand iron swords welded together. Brainiac 5 stood at her side making her keenly aware he was still senior to her now and forever. "God save the Queen!" the crowd chanted repeatedly. Kara shed a tear as she imagined Alex in the front pew giving her a proud smile.
Seeing Kara forced to kneel before Brainiac 5 gave Mon the confidence to come before Kara. He took a knee before her. "I, Mon-El of the Jin-Saiyan, do become your liege man of life and limb. In faith and truth, I will bear onto you, to live and die, against all manner of folks. So help me God," Mon recited.
Mon then stood, backed away, and bowed his head to her with the firm resolve that one day he would surpass her. Kara then exited the cathedral with a procession behind her. She was now queen of Earth and eventually, she would become empress of the Galactic Federation.
Author's Notes: The purpose of this bonus episode, aside from the fun of it, is to show Kara's incredibly fast rise to power on Earth. This is to explain why she fell into such a deep depression upon losing the American election of 2020. I place my characters in particular situations and then see where that leads. I'm not making any kind of coherent point about religion or politics here. The connection between scenes is to show Brainiac 5 in various situations whether it be a religious leader, a scientist, or military commander perfectly willing to sacrifice his comrades to achieve instant victory. This may give greater context to Brainiac 5's religious instruction to Mara who is a sincere believer.
The SG showrunners are pitching a Midvale series. Ratings would indicate no one's interested in a Smallville rip-off that has retconned serious events in the lives of its main characters. SG showrunners should never be trusted with a DC show again. However, if such a show were to be produced I'm not going to retcon my Midvale fic. SG Season 6 finale will not be until November which means the final Season 7 of Adventures of Supergirl will have to wait until then.